Desperate Measures
by sasha2010
Summary: A story about the evolution of Karkaroff and how he went from a promising Tri-Wizard Champion to a Death Eater, and his struggle to rise again. Starts in the marauders era. CH 60 A late night visitor brings a shocking surprise. LM/IK/OC no slash
1. Chapter 1 Beginnings

DESPERATE MERASURES

CHAPTER ONE

Beginnings

AN: I don't own Harry Potter. This is just for fun not profit yadda yadda yadda. Karkaroff is a very interesting but in my opinion underwritten character. I had fun including him in Second Chances, another fanfic of mine and decided he needed a fanfic of his own. So I serve him up to you, with a side of Lucius, a sprinkling of Severus, and a dash of smut.

This will be AU. Set in the Marauders era and after the first (and in this world final) fall of Voldemort. This story will be a little darker than Second Chances—that's your warning Hope you are up for it. Enjoy, and please be so kind as to leave your thoughts.

"I love you." Lucius would always tell Natalia, he loved her after their encounters. Given the nature of their relationship, she found it odd, but in that moment, and for long moments afterwards, he meant it. Eventually however the feeling would pass, and he would come to his senses. This always made her just a little bit sad, for she liked who he was in those moments as he pressed against her, catching his breath, and nuzzling her neck. She wondered what was his true self, the loving person who professed his love, or the monster that led her into her nightmare.

That nightmare was the memory she most wanted to forget, but was forever burned into her mind like the dark mark that eventually burned his forearm, shameful, fading, but always there. It was their private, sinister connection.

Natalia was shopping alone in Diagon Alley a few days prior to the start of her fourth year at Hogwarts. She worked all summer cleaning after hours in some of the office buildings around the orphanage that was her home. It was distasteful to have to go back to that dismal place every year after Hogwarts, but that was her lot. Knowing that all her housemates, save Severus, were having wonderful summers with their families, made it all the more miserable. The coddled children of the wealthy would go on lavish holidays, and attend elegant parties at each other's estates. They would attend professional quidditch matches, and rub elbows with the well to do. Then when they returned to school she would have to hear all about it. Being poor wouldn't have been half as bad if she didn't have to listen to those prats.

She managed to save just enough money for school supplies, as long as she bought her books second hand. Tuition would be earned through a work-study program. Slughorn had agreed to take her on as a teaching assistant, and her other duty would be to assist the gamekeeper with the animals. Not glamorous work by any stretch of the imagination but they were good opportunities to learn and she was grateful for them. She was so worried about not being able to come back because of the money. Magical education was her only hope to make something of herself.

Diagon Alley was not particularly crowded that day, it was the day before students were to catch the train to Hogwarts, and most people had done all their shopping long before now. The sun was glistening on the damp cobblestones and she could hear music coming from one of the local pubs, Rikki Don't Lose that Number, by Steely Dan. Their music always put her in a good mood, and so she walked with a little spring in her step.

Since she would be spending her own money this year, she waited until the very last to shop and hoped for some sales. Her first stop was Gringotts to exchange the muggle currency for galleons. Then she was off to purchase books. She had no idea what would happen between Gringotts and the bookstore, but it was something that would haunt her for years.

She took a long time selecting her second hand books, looking hard at the prices to see if she could squeeze out enough money for a few extras, but it was not to be. She waited until there was no one else near the register before taking her books to the counter to pay for them. The woman behind the counter totaled the purchase, which came to $200 galleons. Natalia breathed a sigh of relief as she had just enough money. However, when she reached into her bag she couldn't find it. Not good. Frantically, she rummaged through the bag, the side pockets, the bottom, even feeling for holes, but it was gone. The fruits of an entire summer of work, had vanished. In desperation, she walked back through the store retracing her steps, while the annoyed clerk waited for her. She was breathing hard and beginning to panic. Tears were burning her eyes, and about to start rolling down her cheeks.

"Is there a problem?" The oily voice of Lucius Malfoy purred right behind her and a little too close.

And this began her nightmare. The most respected, and not to mention, arrogant boy in Slytherin, and here he was to see her at her lowest point. Explaining this problem to him would be unthinkable.

Natalia was so humiliated she couldn't even turn to face him. "No. No problem." She tried to get away from him and approached the counter again, retracing her steps a second time.

"Did you find your money yet?" The clerk was getting even more agitated, and she wanted to hex her for airing her dirty laundry in front of Lucius.

"Having trouble keeping track of our funds?" He raised his eyebrow while steel blue orbs, eyed her up and down. "How much is the bill?"

"Two hundred galleons." The clerk barked at him.

Once again he cast an appraising look in her direction. Then he shrugged, and reached into the pocket of his elegantly and perfectly tailored trousers. He pulled out a rather sizable money pouch, and carelessly tossed the money on the counter. Natalia couldn't believe her eyes. No one had ever done such a kind thing for her before, and here was Lucius Malfoy, the boy that everyone in our house admired, helping her. She felt special.

"Thank you. Lucius, that was so terribly kind." She positively gushed. When she later recalled this, it would make her ill to think of how naïve she was, like a lamb being led to the slaughter. The clerk bagged her purchase and handed it to her as she continued to smile demurely at Lucius.

He leaned in closely, so close she could smell his cologne, and a wisp of his blonde hair tickled her cheek. He whispered. "Come with me." His voice was so smooth it sounded like Parseltongue, and taking her hand, he gently led her out of the store. Foolishly, she was initially flattered by the attention. Natalia was a plain girl, too thin with short dark hair, but not so dark as to be striking. No one ever looked twice at her, so she understood nothing of such things. She thought he was flirting with her.

He led her to the shadowy alley behind the store. He reached down and took her bag, tossing it aside carelessly. Then he pushed her gently until her back was against the wall. One of his hands snaked behind her lower back, then he leaned against her and a little groan escaped him. Natalia's heart was pounding like a drum. She was sure he could feel it against his chest. She was never so terrified in her life. Much to her shock, he grazed his hips back and forth against hers. "You have a tight little body Natalia. But you know that don't you?"

Natalia did not respond, hoping that was a rhetorical question, but he was relentless, and asked again.

"Don't you? Answer me you little tease."

"Yes." She squeaked, hoping that was the right answer and hoping he would stop. As good looking as she'd always thought he was, this was a nightmarish predicament that she felt powerless to stop. His lips descended on hers, and now his weight was crushing against her, pushing her harder into the wall. Harder still, he ground his hips against hers.

Too afraid to struggle, too afraid to scream, she shut her eyes and hoped it would be over soon. He grunted as he rubbed his hips back and forth and now she could feel his hard length against her. Fear and humiliation won out over her pride, and she began to cry. How could this be happening to her? Having no protectors, she'd always drabbed her appearance down for precisely this reason. She was afraid of what he would do to her if she cried, so she tried to choke back the tears. He heard her and abruptly ceased his gyrations.

"What's the matter?" He said matter of factly. "Don't you like this?" What an idiotic thing to say. Where there women that actually like being molested against their will in an ally? Natalia didn't know any.

Again she was fearful of giving the wrong answer. He was not a person to be trifled with. She'd seen enough of him to know he was arrogant and vindictive if his vanity was offended. She stammered, looking for a way out.

"Oh," he purred, his tone softening, "You're a virgin aren't you?" He was hissing like a serpent. "Never been kissed either I'll wager."

She shook her head no, while pressing her lips into a tight line and staring hard at the ground.

He placed a well-manicured hand under her chin and pulled her face to meet his gaze. "I won't harm you." His seductive voice seemed made to tempt women. She couldn't think of a way out. "I'm a virgin too. I'll remain that way until marriage to keep our bloodline pristine. But I'm 16 years old and I have…needs. If I'm…nice to you, you could be…nice to me. You understand, don't you?"

_No! Hell no!_ Her head was screaming, but she nodded in agreement.

"You'll need funds throughout the year to replenish supplies and such. Let me have some moments with you like this, and I can help you with that." Natalia didn't answer. One moment like this was enough for her. "Don't even think of refusing me. If word of today got out, you'd be expelled."

At the time she was a scared 14 year-old orphan girl and he was the Slytherin prefect from a wealthy family. She looked up to him and thought he was right. This would have looked very bad, and who would believe her over him? So she gave her answer.

"Okay." How she hated herself in that moment.

"Good girl." He planted one last slimy kiss on her lips and left the alley without so much as a backward glance at the wreckage he'd left behind. She spit his saliva out onto the ground and wiped her mouth on her sleeve. Then she gathered her things and began to make her way home. More than anything she wanted to take a shower.


	2. Chapter 2 Knight in White Satin

CHAPTER TWO

Knight in White Satin

When she returned to Hogwarts the following day, things were as expected. As she unpacked her minimal belongings, the other girls were busy trying to one-up each other with stories of their grand summers. Natalia had a rather obnoxious streak in her nature, and smirked to herself thinking she might share her interlude with Lucius just to watch their jaws hit the floor in shock. "Oh me? Well I spent a glorious afternoon dry humping in Diagon Alley with Lu. How was your holiday?" As amusing as their reactions would be, she was smart enough to keep that little tidbit to herself.

She greeted Severus as they sat down to the sorting ceremony and feast. "How was your summer?"

"Dismal. Yours?" Merlin, he could be a grump. Natalia considered herself to be on the snarky side, but Severus had it down to an art form.

"The same. I'm glad to be back." One corner of his mouth turned up in agreement. Natalia sighed knowing that was about as much as anyone except Lily could get out of him. His face suddenly brightened as he looked past her. She turned to see Lily, all smiles and waving back. "Did you see Lily much this summer?"

"No," he said softly, still gazing in her direction, though she was already conversing with someone else. "Her parents took the family on holiday." That explained why his summer was dismal.

She wanted to ask more about his summer, but a letter being dropped off by a shuffling house elf interrupted her. This was an unusual occurrence as post was normally only delivered in the mornings. She opened it and read.

_Dear Miss Smith,_

_I regret to inform you that we will not be utilizing your services to help with the animals this term. The Board of Trustees for the school has determined that there are too many dangerous creatures under our care to continue to allow students to assist the gamekeeper. We will instead be utilizing house elves for this function in the future._

_ Sincerely,_

_ Headmaster Dumbledore_

She sighed heavily. Things were quickly going from bad to worse. She had no idea how she could make up the difference in funds now_._ Severus noticed her agitation.

"Something wrong?"

She tossed the letter at him and he read it. "Well that's certainly inconvenient. Strange too. Students have been helping with the animals for years. I wonder what made the Board reconsider."

She frowned and looked away from him. Her eyes rested on Lucius, who smiled back at her in a way that sent a shiver down the back of her neck. Quickly, she turned her focus back to Severus. "Is Malfoy's father still on the Board of Trustees?"

"Of course." Severus drawled. "How could you not know that? He mentions it every fourth sentence."

Although she could never prove that Lucius interfered with her work-study arrangement, it certainly was an appalling coincidence. Her financial situation was becoming more troublesome by the moment.

"You know Poppy has asked Slughorn to recommend a few students with interest in the healing arts to assist with quidditch injuries. If he's already agreed to take you on as a T.A. I'm sure he would have no problem recommending you for that. I'll speak to him tonight if you like."

Every now and then Severus surprised her. They were both from hardscrabble backgrounds and for that reason he seemed to have a soft spot for her. He put up a horrible persona to keep people away, but on the inside, he really did have a big heart. She knew of course, that he would die if anyone ever found out.

"Thank you Severus. That would be very helpful."

"Don't mention it. I'm afraid it won't be many hours, so you'll still have to find other work, but it's something."

She felt eyes on her again and looked over at Lucius. He appeared to have been listening; his eyes gleamed at her He licked his lips in a manner that he probably thought she would find tantalizing. She didn't. In fact, she was starting to realize that their interlude of the prior day was no laughing matter. He had plans for her. The thought of it made her squirm in her seat. But what could she do? There was no one she could tell who would have helped her. Even Severus as an underclassmen, was very much under his thumb.

She desperately hoped he would forget about the whole thing. What did he need her for anyway? He had girls lusting after him all over the school, and was all but promised to Narcissa Black. Surely this was just a whim. The best she could do, would be to avoid him as much as possible and hope he found some other diversion.

As she was thinking about this, an entire school full of diversions presented themselves in the form of the young ladies of the Beauxbatton Academy, who were introduced as visitors for the Tri-Wizard Tournament. The embodiments of all things feminine, those girls were the polar opposite of Natalia. They skipped and danced their way into the Great Hall followed by their Headmistress, who had to be the tallest woman she'd ever seen. Every boy from Hogwarts ogled them and she quickly looked at Lucius to see if he was one of the ones taken in by them. He glanced their way but quickly turned back to Narcissa Black who was sitting directly opposite him and smiled at her in a patronizing manner. Natalia wondered if Narcissa realized what a phony he was.

Next, Headmaster Dumbledore introduced their second guest school for the tournament, The Proud Sons of Drumstrang. What an entrance they made. The all male student body marched into the room in striking red robes, black trousers and black high boots that were uniformly polished to a gleaming shine. They carried large sticks that they pounded on the ground, producing sparks and cannon like sounds. One student doing acrobatics and another doing some kind of fire-breathing pyrotechnic trick preceded them. Their headmaster, Nikolay Oblonsky, accompanied them. Natalia's first impression of him was, pompous arse.

Natalia watched as the overly masculine student body marched into the Great Hall with minimal interest until she saw the young Igor Karkaroff stroll down the aisle with his schoolmates. For years, every time she would recall that moment, that instant in time, it would play like a romantic movie in her mind. Everything moved in slow motion, the breeze catching his hair and "Nights in White Satin," in the background, even though there was certainly no music playing. Natalia never really liked that song until the very moment she saw him and then it just clicked. Years later, she told him how she remembered that moment, but not the Moody Blues song. She knew she would have NEVER heard the end of it.

She'd never seen anyone so stunningly handsome before. His dark hair was as glossy as Snape's, but fuller, wavier. It curled over the back of his collar, but unlike Snape he kept it pushed off his face, making his strong features more visible. His eyes were large, chocolate brown and framed with long eyelashes that would make any girl jealous. They had a bit of a droopy quality, which made him look more interesting in her opinion. He had a strong nose and full lips, surrounded by a bit of stubble. As he strode into the Great Hall, he must have felt every girls eyes on him, for he seemed to smile smugly to himself and looked slightly to the ground.

He took a seat by his comrades and scanned the crowd. His eyes looked right over Natalia, which didn't surprise her. She was unremarkable, or so she thought. She certainly wasn't special enough for someone like that. The boy sitting beside him nudged him and whispered something. He nodded and smirked, eyes continuing to scan the crowd. They settled on the Gryffindor table and his mouth curved into stunning smile showing off perfectly straight white teeth.

Natalia looked in that direction to see whom he was looking at, just in time to see Sasha Malfoy roll her eyes and toss her hair as she turned away from him. It was no surprise that he would fancy her. She was Lucius' sister, but they were nothing alike. She was far nicer, less pretentious, very popular, and gorgeous. Blokes like him would naturally favor girls like that. Natalia sighed heavily and looked down at her plate. This was shaping up to be a miserable year

After the feast, she was charged with helping the first year girls settle into their new home. As she gazed upon their fresh, excited little faces, she recalled her own sorting and her first impressions of her housemates. She had been so nervous. Slytherin House would have been a good fit for her if she hadn't been so poverty-stricken. During that first post-sorting feast on her first night in the castle, she listened to the conversations over the table, she realized, to her dismay, that she was in the house that had the largest contingency of wealthy students. She immediately considered them to be snobs. They droned on endlessly about their money, possessions and blood status, which, at the time, she had no idea about. The meal was the largest amount of food she'd ever seen at once, far more bountiful than the meager meals at the orphanage. She stole glances around the table at some of her new housemates as she ate in silence.

She remembered the first time she saw Lucius. He was gorgeous. There was no other word to describe him, wearing what were obviously the finest school robes to be had. He had what she, considered to be an incredible profile, strong nose and manly chin, which complimented his shockingly blue eyes. He had long blond hair that was almost platinum. Natalia couldn't help but stare, in her opinion, he was beautiful. Charisma oozed from every pore, and it was obvious by the way the others watched and deferred to him, that he was in charge. Lucius Malfoy was the big man on campus. He caught her admiring him and smirked. She blushed before quickly looking back at her plate.

The Lestrange brothers made an impression. They were gregarious roosters strutting about as if they owned the place. Bella Black was always at their side. She was dark and beautiful as well, arguably the queen bee. Arguably, because many would give that distinction to Narcissa Black, her blonde and beautiful sister. She was already coupled with Lucius, and they made a striking, yet seemingly incompatible pair. Their public face was that of the idyllic pureblood couple, but this was a thin shell hiding their true nature. Lucius, although outwardly gracious to her, seemed somehow patronizing and disingenuous. Narcissa seemed to tolerate him, yet her thoughts always appeared to be otherwise engaged.

Across from her sat a stringy little boy that was also a first year. Every bit as arrogant as the others, it was obvious that he would fit in well, except for one thing. As she appraised his appearance, he carried the same look of sad neglect as she did. His hair was too long and had a greasy look. His robes were second hand. Severus Snape was like her, on the fringes. He looked up from his dinner and snarled, "What are you looking at?"

Natalia had dealt with his kind in the orphanage all her life. Hogwarts would be no different. And so she decided to start crafting her tough persona right then and there, feeling it would be critical to her survival. "Nothing much," she responded while looking down her nose.

Despite their rocky start, Severus Snape and Natalia Smith became good friends. That is, they were as good of a friend as either of them had ever had. Neither one were particularly social, so they had very few confidants. He did have one other friend in school, Lily Evans. She was a Gryffindor and they knew each other prior to coming to Hogwarts. In all the years that she knew Severus, Natalia could never understand the attraction. She assumed it was more proximity than anything. In her opinion, Severus had such a horrible home life that if anyone was kind enough and showed him enough attention, he could be easily led. Fortunately for him, not many did. He had a rather surly disposition even as a child, and other than Lily, and a few Slytherin, people pretty much left him alone. However, Severus Snape was a chameleon; he knew how the world worked and what he must do to survive.

Anything Natalia learned about the way of the world, she learned on her own, as she never knew her parents. They called her Natalia Smith, but the name Smith wasn't her real name, just the name she was given when they found her. She was dropped off on an orphanage doorstep at the tender age of two months old. They abandoned her there with nothing but the tattered pink blanket she was swaddled in, and a note pinned to it that read only "Her name is Natalia." She never knew anything else about her background. So they stuck her with the name Smith, a name that carried no weight, and some considered lowly, common. They could have named her anything, but this is the hand she was dealt.

As a child in the orphanage, the same one where Voldemort once lived, she began to exhibit some magical tendencies, and just as they had with the young Riddle, Dumbledore was summoned to appraise her. She was only eleven and didn't remember much about the meeting, except that he told her he would teach her to harness her magical powers. Power. As a poor orphan, she had been powerless and at the mercy of others her entire life. To hear that she had untapped power and potential inside her was thrilling. From then on power was all she could think about. Naturally, she was sorted into Slytherin.

Since she had no money, she was taken in as a charity case. The do-gooders of Hogwarts would front the money for her wand, robes, books, and tuition until she was fourteen. However, after that, she would have to come up with her own money. She would have to find a way to finance it or, be placed on a work-study program to earn the money for the following years expenses.

Despite her lack of funds, Natalia would look back on her late childhood at Hogwarts as one of the happiest times in her life. It was a palace compared to the orphanage. It was where she learned to channel powers she never knew she had.


	3. Chapter 3 Under My Thumb

CHAPTER THREE

Under My Thumb

_AN: Warning-very dark chapter. I was thinking of a song to set the mood for this chapter. "Under Her Thumb" by the Rolling Stones comes to mind. Ha—you'll see why._

Several weeks went by and Natalia was thankfully able to avoid Lucius. Severus was able to secure a recommendation for her from Slughorn, and so she joined him in helping the quidditch teams with conditioning and injuries. The regular season wouldn't start for a few more weeks so they had no serious injuries to deal with. They mainly helped with stretching and minor scrapes. It was excellent practice and she learned a great deal under Poppy's direction.

While she was grateful for the paid position, it made avoiding Lucius more challenging. Severus mercifully volunteered to work with the Slytherin team, while she rotated between helping the other three houses. On the rare occasions when Lucius and Natalia did see each other, there were other people around, and so he did not acknowledge her. Sadly, she had the nagging feeling that her luck was bound to run out sooner or later.

One evening, she was attending a Ravenclaw practice that was running very late. They needed the practice. It was dark when they finished and they all walked back to the castle together. As she parted course from them to go back to the Slytherin dormitories, she felt someone's eyes on her.

Turning her head slightly, she was faced with the charismatic specter of Lucius. He followed her down the deserted corridor from about twenty paces behind for some time. She quickened her pace, but his long strides soon allowed him to catch up with her and when they neared a broom closet he made his move. He grabbed her hard by her arm causing her to gasp. "Don't make a sound." He whispered into her ear as he pulled her inside.

He locked the door and they were alone in the darkness until he held up his wand, and the room glowed with the soft light emitting from it. She could smell dust and cleaning supplies. "I've barely seen you since start of term." He purred like a cat. "Have you been avoiding me?" _What a ridiculous question._ Did he not see why she felt the need to avoid him?

She narrowed her eyes at him. If there was one thing she learned early in Slytherin House, it was never to show fear. This time, she was ready for him, or so she thought. "Very perceptive of you." She managed to respond without so much as a stammer.

He rearranged his features in to a patronizing look and put one hand over his heart. "I'm hurt. I thought you liked me."

Other than narrowing her eyes and glaring at him, she made no response.

"I like you." His voice lilted as if he was speaking to a small child.

This made her snort with disgust.

"Don't you believe me?" The patronizing tone continued, confirming Natalia's theory that she was in for trouble. "You know I haven't stopped thinking about you since that day in Diagon Alley." His hand grazed down her arm sending a chill down her spine. Slowly he leaned in until his cheek was less than an inch from her own, and nuzzled her hair.

Natalia was quickly losing her cool and starting to panic. Her mind raced, searching frantically for an escape, however she could think of none. "Lucius, please, don't." She put her hands on his chest and tried to push him off, but he would not be denied. She was going to be no match for his strength. "This isn't right."

"What's not right?" His breath was warm on her neck, but his tone was casual, unconcerned. "Am I not allowed to care for you?"

"You could have any girl you want for free. You don't need me."

A haughty look clouded across his face as he pulled away and rolled his eyes. "Free? Humph! You think these pureblood princesses come free? Quite the contrary, they are all dreadfully expensive." It was a very astute point, and his insight surprised her. Natalia however, didn't appreciate it at the moment.

"I thought you and Narcissa were…"

He cut her off. "All pre-arranged by our families," he snapped. "Bloodline. I've no say in the matter." Then his tone softened again. "If I did, I would be with someone like you." If he was patronizing her again, his acting was getting better, for she was starting to be drawn in by this serpent.

"You would?" For a moment, she was tempted.

"Why is that so hard to believe? Do you think just because I'm wealthy I don't have feelings or problems? You're wrong."

Natalia could certainly relate to his feelings of isolation, even if he was at the moment, only slightly believable. "What problems could you possibly have?"

Lucius stifled a grin with great difficulty. This underrated beauty was walking right into his trap. He carefully rearranged his features to look ever so slightly pitiful. He looked at the ground and hesitated before answering in his saccharine tone. "I don't have anyone who truly cares about me." Beneath half closed lids, his eyes darted back to her, gauging her reaction.

Instinctually, she offered support. "Lucius, you have legions of disciples."

He sighed as an expression of pleasure. She was trying to reassure him, his plan was working. "Sycophants would be a more accurate term. They are only around because I'm wealthy, and from a powerful family. They want to use my position. That's what I like about you." He lowered his head so his eyes could meet hers and reached up gently to stroke her hair, but was disappointed when he noticed her cringing slightly. "You've never played into that, despite four years in Slytherin. You remain …unaffected."

Natalia actually started to feel sorry for him. She knew loneliness well and wouldn't wish it on anyone. Perhaps he was more human than she thought. No, his actions in Diagon Alley proved he was not. This was merely a part he chose to play. Immediately she mentally vowed not to fall into his trap. Once the decision was made, she acted on it.

"Please help me Natalia. I could use a friend like you."

With a defiant raise of her chin, she answered him. "If you want someone who likes you for yourself, this isn't the way to find her." She often wondered what would have happened if she hadn't stood up to him in that moment. But she did, and once the deed was done, she could never go back and undo it.

The smile disintegrated from his face, and changed his appearance completely. His jaw tensed, his eyes narrowed and darkened, and a sneer polluted his lips. The slightly insecure young man, was now a monster. "Too clever for your own good." He growled, "Expelliarmus!" Natalia gasped as she was now defenseless. "I'd hoped to do this civilly, but I see that's not possible." Viscously, his lips crushed hers, as he pinned her against the wall. His tongue forced entry past her lips, determined to possess her. Natalia was desperate for breath when he finally pulled back slightly to utter, "Muffliato!" Now her screams would be useless. His erection become insistent and he ground his hips against hers to feed it's hunger.

Crushing her lips with his again, he moaned down her throat as he forced his hardness against her hip. When he did, she finally managed to turn her head, and pull her lips away from his. "Lucius, please."

"I love it when you beg." He growled. "No need. I won't deny you, my pet." He quickly unzipped his trousers and exposed himself. She was terrified at what was coming next. He seized her hand and despite her struggle, managed to make her touch him. She tried to pull her hand away but his grip was like a vice, cutting off the circulation in her hand. As soon as he placed her hand on him, he moaned in ecstasy. "Oh, yes. I knew you would feel so good." His hand was over hers, guiding it to close over his member, showing her exactly how he wanted to be touched. He moved it back and forth, slowly at first, seemingly wanting to savor the sensation, but then faster. Ragged, breathy moans reverberated into her ear. The faster he made her stroke him, the louder he got.

She realized he had no intention of having actual sex with her, just as he had told her the first time he came after her. Knowing her only way out, she decided to get him to his goal quickly, since that was his obvious intent. She leaned in and kissed his neck, before whispering in his ear. "Let go. Let me please you."

"Merlin, yes." He groaned again and leaned his head back against the wall.

"Yes, Natalia, so good. Harder." She obliged. It was mere seconds before he ejaculated all over them both and slouched against her breathing hard.

She stood there staring at him in disgust, but he had dropped his lighted wand, and in the darkness, and didn't notice her sentiment. "Come here." He pulled her body against his and whispered. "I love you." As if this situation could be more twisted, he had the audacity to say he loved her. It made her feel physically ill.

Slowly he began to collect himself. Stooping to the floor, he searched for, and found his wand, which he used to vanish his seed. Then he zipped up his trousers, and made himself presentable. He leaned in to kiss her but when she didn't kiss him back, he pulled away and looked at her for a long moment in the shadows. With a heavy sigh, he reached into his pocket and pulled out a bag of money and pressed it into her hands. "Thank you. There are 300 galleons."

Natalia knew better than to take the money. However she was scared and desperate. She knew she couldn't tell anyone what happened. She certainly didn't want to make him angry. There was no telling what he would do then. And yes, the money would help pay for her tuition among other necessary items. So she took the money and kept her mouth shut. Their relationship, or rather, their arrangement, continued for years this way. She regretted it her whole life.

It was always the same when she and Lucius were together. Not altogether unpleasant to her at times. She had no other experience to compare it to however. Occasionally he would want to touch her, provide some pleasure. But that was just a pretext. Mostly it was all about her getting him off. He didn't even know what she looked like naked. Natalia thought perhaps he needed some boundaries for himself so he could rationalize that this was acceptable.

Interestingly, he liked to talk while she touched him. That is he liked to talk dirty. "You feel so good." "Stroke my cock harder." Foolishly, she used to think he talked that way because he was mad for desire for her but over time realized, he always said the same thing, rather lacking in inspiration. He merely liked sex a little on the dirty side. He liked to hear her talk too. That was the funniest part for her. If you could consider any part of it funny. She would occasionally think about what outlandish thing she would say next time they were together. One time I said, "I love the feel of your Slytherin Serpent." As soon as he heard it, he came with a vengeance, and she had to bite her tongue to keep from laughing.

In the beginning, she was foolish enough to think he liked to hear what she liked and what she loved because he wanted her to enjoy herself. But eventually, she figured out that it was about feeding his ego and not her pleasure at all. It mattered little what she said, except for one thing. After the first time, he could never, not ever, have an orgasm unless she told him how big his cock was. He was that self-involved. She didn't know what he needed her for. He might as well have sex with himself and cut out the middle person. It annoyed her, but then she started turning that to her advantage. If she wanted to get it over with, she'd tell him right away. Bam! Done! She could go back to the library. If she was feeling sadistic, she'd make him work for it till he was desperate, breathing hard, sweating and at her mercy. She liked him like that. He didn't have all the power in the relationship, despite his perception that the money gave him all the power.

This was the time in her life when she should have been just becoming aware of boys, having girlish crushes and blushing when a boy looked her way. Instead she was giving Lucius Malfoy 300 galleon hand jobs in the broom closet. Life is not fair.

_AN: Lucius…. what a miserable thing he is. Boo. What do you think of Natalia? On one hand she could tell, but what would that get her? She sees herself as wrong, but she didn't initiate it. It's the eternal trap for people in that situation. _

_Thanks for the PM's and reviews on this story. It's so encouraging__._


	4. Chapter 4 Imaginary Lover

CHAPTER FOUR

Imaginary Lover

Fall quickly turned to winter that year. She was so busy, and time was slipping by so fast that she didn't realize it was December until she heard people talking about Christmas and the upcoming Yule Ball. Although Lucius managed about 2-3 sticky interludes a month with her, and always professed that he loved her, he did not ask her to the ball. This did not surprise her in the least, for other than their ultra-discrete encounters, he did not acknowledge her.

As the ball drew closer, everyone was consumed with preparations. Natalia was the exception for that rule. However, she was not troubled by it. The only person she was interested in, Igor Karkaroff, didn't know she existed. Even if he had known, she did not feel it would have made a difference. She felt he was way out her league. In those days, she felt everyone was out of her league. Since first arriving at Hogwarts, she had grown much taller, but that was the only thing she thought had changed. According to Lucius, she had a pleasing figure and he told her so at every opportunity. Of course, he was completely mental. She was a little too tall, and tended to slouch in order to blend in with her classmates. Although her shoulder length hair was dark and thick, she could never seem to do anything with it. It just sort of hung there. Other girls in her dorm did each other's hair and makeup while they gossiped and chatted away about various glamour charms and beautification techniques. Natalia never really fit in with the Slytherin girls, however. They were snobbish, and not willing to accept a person of her questionable background into their circle. She overheard a few of the cattier girls whispering about her from time to time. They giggled and said she looked like Severus. She was hurt and horrified at the time, but really, in hindsight, decided they were spot on. The two of them could have been related, oh the horror.

She didn't have time to fret about their snarky opinions, however. She was very busy with schoolwork, assisting Slughorn with his younger students, and working with the Quidditch teams. It was exhausting. Who had time for things like the Yule Ball? Natalia certainly did not.

The first Saturday morning in December was a particularly busy day. There was quidditch in the morning. Drumstrang was going to scrimmage Hufflepuff. It wouldn't count towards house cup points. It would merely be an exhibition, and probably a very bad one. Hufflepuff was never a house known for its athletes and the strapping young men of Drumstrang were sure to rout them. It was cold and windy that day, and with such a mismatch, it was no surprise that the stands were only half full. Only the quidditch faithful would bother to come out on a day such as this.

While she was less than pleased with having to be outside shivering for the match, and dealing with whiney Hufflepuffs who faked injuries when the match got tough, her position did afford her the opportunity to ogle the devastatingly handsome Igor Karkaroff. This had become a favorite pastime of hers. Her first impression when he arrived at Hogwarts was that he was just another good-looking quidditch jock. Nice to look at, but probably arrogant, and perhaps not that intelligent. Through careful observation she determined that her first impression was incorrect.

For one thing, he wasn't as snobbish as the aristocratic Slytherin boys. Nor was he mouthy and obnoxious like Black and Potter on the Gryffindor team. He was friendly to everyone and always smiling. It amazed her how someone could be so enthusiastic all the time. As she continued to watch him, however, it became apparent that he harbored a desperate need to be liked. Though she was quite sure he would never have admitted it. It appeared to matter very much to him if you liked him or not.

For example, he had become fairly good friends with Regulus Black. Regulus, although a stickler about blood status, didn't particularly judge others by nationality or level of wealth. He was considered rather open minded by Slytherin standards. Most of his housemates would say that blood status mattered above all. However, but in reality, to them it was far more about social standing, hence money. So, Regulus would include Igor in their little gatherings, but Igor was always on the outskirts; tolerated but not welcome, attractive but not desirable. She sensed that it bothered him, for he appeared to try very hard with these people. In her opinion, he put forth far more effort than they were worth, and it made her sad for him. He was forever trying to ingratiate himself with the Lestrange brothers and, much to her horror, Lucius. They, however, always kept him at arm's length. She wanted to shake some sense into him when she saw him do that. She wanted to ask him why he felt the need to do that, and why it mattered. This lovely young man was clearly worth ten of them.

Her Igor was having a rough day today. Headmaster Oblonsky stalked back and forth on the sidelines, livid because Drumstrang was losing. Igor, the Seeker had become disoriented in the fog and taken a spill. Oblonskly immediately pulled him out and put in a younger, less experienced player. Now the Headmaster was berating Igor who slouched on the bench with his head hung in shame. Natalia stood merely a few paces away and heard bits and pieces, "Stupid," "Incompetent," "Worthless," "all your fault." Suddenly the crowd cheered and they all looked back at the field in time to see the Hufflepuff Seeker taking a victory lap around the field with the golden snitch in his hand. "Idiot!" Oblonsky struck Igor across the face with the back of his hand. Igor was knocked off the edge of the bench and raised his arm bracing for the next blow. Oblonsky seemed to sense that eyes were now on him and he refrained from abusing his student again. "I want a one page essay on why I should allow your miserable carcass to continue to attend this fine institution of learning. I want it on my desk by tomorrow night or I'll pack you up and ship you back to your father. And this time he won't talk me into keeping you."

Igor sat on the ground following Oblonsky with his eyes and glaring at him. Anyone would have cried after being treated in such a manner, but not Igor. He clenched his jaw tightly and quickly scrambled to his feet. He dusted off his quidditch robes, and haughtily raised his chin in defiance, before stalking off the field after Oblonsky. Natalia truly admired his character in that moment. They could bend him, but they couldn't break him. She found that to be a very admirable trait, and smiled to herself as she watched him walk away.

After quidditch, the students were permitted to go into Hogsmeade for the day. Most of the students were shopping for Christmas presents, or picking out their ensembles for the Yule Ball. Natalia didn't have need for either of these chores, so she wandered around alone, window-shopping. She spied Lucius and Narcissa ducking into Mme Puddifoot's and rolled her eyes. What a rat. Well, at least that meant she was in the clear for the rest of the day. She met up with Severus in the bookstore and they decided to go to The Three Broomsticks. Although she could barely afford a butter beer, she was hoping to develop a friendship with Mme Rosemerta, so that perhaps she would allow her to work there eventually. She needed all the connections she could make there, and the pay was bound to be decent.

The place was fairly empty except for a few of the Drumstrang boys, including Igor. They had apparently started drinking immediately after quidditch, as they were already quite loud despite the early hour. Regulus Black was also in their company but as usual, he had his act together, and was not as rowdy as the others. Severus and Natalia sat down at a table and ordered.

They sipped in silence, neither comfortable in social situations but comfortable enough with each other that they could be silent together. He wasn't always great company but for Natalia, it was better than being alone. The door burst open and Lucius' sister, Sasha, breezed into the room. Almost immediately, her eyes went to Severus, and she joined them. Her blue eyes always seemed to light up when she saw him, but he never noticed. Natalia thought it was an odd attraction. They were polar opposites, but if Sasha could eventually pull him away from Lily, she was all for it. His crush on the Gryffindor ginger was toxic in her opinion. She sat down with them and began to chatter merrily on about her day at Hogsmeade. Although Natalia didn't care for most of the Gryffindor students, she found Sasha likeable. Sadly, Igor thought so too. He was completely enamored with her and practically tripped all over himself to impress her. Predictably, it wasn't but a few minutes before he motioned for her to join them.

"Oh, there's Igor. I'm surprised he's not hiding in the bowels of the ship after that loss today." She giggled. She loved to talk trash about quidditch and she was good enough to back up her mouth. "I mean Hufflepuff? He really was off his game today."

"He looked pretty upset when he left the field." It pained Natalia to recall how that horrible man chastised him. "I wouldn't mention it to him."

"Oh, of course I'm going to mention it. Do you think he would let it go if he beat Gryffindor?" She smirked good-naturedly. "I'm going to go rub it in all day long."

She jumped up and began to walk over to Regulus, who she was very close with, and Igor. "Hey Regulus, please tell me your giving this big sissy some flying lessons. I've seen first years faster than you Karkaroff!"

The boys all laughed on cue. Igor did as well, although the laughter did not reach his eyes and Natalia could tell her remark bothered him. He waved at the waiter and requested another bottle of whatever it was they were doing shots of. He wavered slightly, unsteady on his feet. When he looked sad, it made Natalia feel sad. The emotions in those big brown eyes were contagious.

"What's got your wand in a knot?" Severus asked between sips.

"What? Me?" He could always read her. She found it most annoying. "I'm fine."

"You look sad all of a sudden. What's the problem? You're not still sulking about the Yule Ball are you?"

"I told you, I've no interest in that. Colossal waste of time and money in my opinion." It was a lie. Having no one ask her made her feel like an outcast. She vaguely hoped Severus would ask her as a friend so they wouldn't be the only ones not going, but no such luck. She wondered if he was holding out in case Lily Evans would suddenly, miraculously become available.

As if on cue, the door opened and in walked Saint Lily with James Potter and his cronies. Lily said hello as she passed, but her friendship with Severus had cooled, and she walked by them without stopping to chat. James glared at Severus, who stared him down, daring him to say something, but he didn't. They moved to the far corner of the room. Severus downed the last of his butter beer and slammed the cup on the table. "Come on Natalia, let's get out of here."

She was grateful not to have to watch the Igor show for the rest of the afternoon. More and more, she found herself thinking of him. She particularly thought of him when Lucius was forcing her hand, so to speak. Fantasizing away while Lucius was breathing down her neck helped her get through those times. Humiliating as those seedy fondlings were, she had to disconnect from it in some way just to keep her sanity.

They walked back to the castle in silence, both wallowing in the agony of unrequited teenage love. When they reached the gates, Severus finally spoke. "I have to work on the charms essay. Would you care to join me in the library?"

She was sure he didn't want to be alone after seeing Lily and James together. This was a feeling she certainly understood, and her heart hurt just as much for his pain as her own. "Sure. Let's get our books and go."

They spent the afternoon engrossed in their essays, pausing occasionally to chat softly. Finally Severus noticed the time. "Drat. It's 6:30. We're going to miss dinner if we don't leave now. Pack up and let's go." She hadn't noticed how hungry she was until then. It was already pitch dark out, except for what was promising to be a beautiful half moon.

They settled in at the Slytherin table with Regulus Black, who despite his long afternoon, was none the worse for wear. Regulus did not over indulge in spirits like some of the others. A Drumstrang student, who was one of Oblonsky's closest aides, interrupted their quiet supper. "Regulus, have you seen Igor today? He was barred from leaving the ship, but apparently he did, and now no one knows where he is."

Regulus stared at the young man and blinked twice. "No. Haven't seen him all day."

"Well, if you do, get him back to the ship. If Oblonsky finds out he sneaked out, he'll be in loads of trouble." The young man scurried off.

Natalia's heart started to beat a little faster with worry that if Igor was caught, the Headmaster would kick him out of school and she would never see his lovely face again. It was silly. She barely knew him, but it was her gut reaction. "Regulus, that was a lie. You were with him all day."

Regulus shrugged, completely unconcerned for Igor's plight. "I left his drunk arse at The Three Broomsticks." He pocketed a roll for later and stood to leave. "If he gets kicked out, it will be no worse than he deserves. Foul git can't hold his liquor like a gentleman. He was so obnoxious, we all left him at the pub in his drunken stupor. If he gets caught, it will be his own fault. Who gets that pissed in the middle of the day?" He popped a cream puff into his mouth and strode out of the Great Hall.

Natalia didn't know how she was going to do it, but she had to help him. She'd need an accomplice though. He was a big boy and might be tough to handle in his present condition. "Severus?"

"What?" He raised his eyebrows at her already suspicious.

"You and I are friends right?"

"I guess." He replied cautiously. "Depends on what you want."

She smiled at him, not knowing how to proceed. She didn't need to. Again, he read her like a book. "Oh, no!" He leaned back and snarled at her like she had a bogey on her face. "Not that guy." She began to blush. "Natalia, he's a buffoon." She narrowed her eyes and tried to think of a comeback. "He doesn't even know you're alive. He never will. Trust me those rich snots want nothing to do with people like us. I thought you knew that."

She knew he was correct but persisted anyway. "Severus, pleaaaaassse."

He gave an exasperated sigh.

"I'll finish your charms essay."

"Oh, well, there's a winning prospect." He was dripping in sarcasm.

"You know I'm supposed to work the Gryffindor/Slytherin match. If James or Sirius gets hurt I could botch the remedy, or maybe some other form of sabotage." He pursed his lips while considering her offer. "Of course, I might be too distraught if Igor gets the boot."

Severus studied her as he considered this. Natalia was one of his few friends, and he would not wish this type of torment on her. He knew this horrible feeling all too well, only, he had no allies to intervene on his behalf. Therefore, he relented. "All right."

"Yeaaaa!" She gave a rare girly squeal.

"But Natalia, you don't have to throw the match. Keep your integrity. I'll help you because we're friends."

"The best." She beamed across the table at him.

"He's probably still in Hogsmeade, but we'll have to sneak out. I know a passageway. I'll leave now. You stay here. Meet me by the Ravenclaw entrance in 10 minutes." He seemed to be excited at the prospect of a caper.

"See you then."

They were able to sneak out without any trouble at all. She got the feeling that he did this often but didn't ask questions. They ran quickly down the hill to town, and went first to the place they had last seen him, The Three Broomsticks. The place was deserted, except for one old man slouched over his firewhiseky, and Mme Rosemerta who was listening to the old man tell a drunken tale. The room was filled with beautiful piano music. Natalia immediately recognized the song, 'Moonlight Sonata'. Her eyes drifted toward the sound and she was surprised to see Igor sitting at the piano, eyes closed, and playing perfectly. His head gently swayed as he seemed to feel the notes in his body rather than reading the sheet music in front of him.

"I hope you two have come to fetch this one." Mme Rosemerta barked at us, while nodding towards Igor. "He's piss drunk, and all his cronies got mad and left him here on my hands."

"We'll try to oblige you, Mme Rosemerta." Severus walked over and stood next to the piano. "Time to go, Karkaroff, before you get yourself in trouble again."

"Shh, let me finish this song." He spoke over the tune.

Without thinking, Natalia sat down beside him on the piano bench and marveled at the way his hands glided gracefully over the keys. It would be neither the first nor the last time she would be mesmerized by this young man.

Severus was impatient. "No one wants to listen to that racket! Let's go."

"Racket? No, no no, this is no racket. It's Beethoven." He winked at Severus. "Besides, the ladies love it." He nudged Natalia with his shoulder and smiled drunkenly, making her blush.

"You're drunk and deluded if you think this attracts women. What an obvious choice, and the place is empty anyway."

He tilted his head toward her, drawing her gaze with sincerity in his eyes. "You like this song don't you?" He smiled seductively though he was not trying to.

Finally she was close enough to get a good look at his big brown eyes and instantly became so unnerved, she had difficulty constructing her response. "Uh, huh." Was all she could manage. Igor could have asked her anything in that moment, and she would have agreed to it.

"See! She likes it. That's your problem, Snape, you juss don't understhand women." Between his slurring and accent, Natalia thought his voice was delightful. She could have stayed right there all night, but she'd already dragged Severus out and he just wanted to get Igor back to the ship, and be done with this little excursion. "Don't be ill-tempered with us just because you're not suave like me."

Then he leaned against Natalia's shoulder. When he spoke again, his voice was deep and smooth as silk.

"That's what they call me, you know? The Suave Slav. Yes, that's me." He chuckled at himself as she hoped that was just a joke. If it was a joke, it was funny. If he was serious, he was an idiot. Perhaps it was a little of both.

Severus jerked him up by the collar. "Now, move it before I change my mind." Igor staggered a bit as Severus pushed him towards the door.

"Easy! Easy! I'm going." Igor glared at him as we walked into the street. He was silent for a moment as they walked, but Natalia could tell his annoyance with Severus was stewing. They hadn't gone far when he started in on Severus. "You know, you really are a mean bastard." Severus ignored him, but Igor was in the mood to tease someone. "You're a mean one, Mr. Grinch." Igor began singing in his deep baritone voice, and it boomed all through the streets of Hogsmeade. "You're heart's an empty hole. Your brain is full of spiders. You've got garlic in your soul Mr. Griii-inch! I wouldn't touch you, with a…thirty-nine-and-a-half foot pooooole!"

He stopped singing for a moment, and turned to Natalia to comment, "Oh and by the way I actually have one." He staggered around and laughed at his own joke. Natalia tried not to laugh, knowing Severus would be furious, but her shoulders were already shaking. She looked down at the road, for if she saw Severus react, she knew would surely die laughing. He was kind of a Grinch, even if he was her bestie.

"Get your shit together Karkaroff!" Severus was not amused. He gave Igor another shove, then said under her breath to Natalia. "I can't believe you like this guy."

His annoyance put her over the edge and she burst out laughing. She thought Igor was the funniest man on earth, and the madder Severus got, the funnier she thought he was. Laughter encouraged him, as he always adored an audience, particularly a female audience.

"You're a foul one, Mr. Grinch. You're a nasty, wasty skunk. Your heart is full of unwashed socks, your soul is full of gunk. Mr. Gri-iinch. The three words that best describe you are as follows, and I quote: Stink, Stank, Stunk! Dadada DA da." He swept Natalia up in his arms and swung her around, dancing to this ridiculous song as Severus fumed. He whirled her around one too many times, and then the liquor caught up with him and he fell, pulling her on top of him. Two bodies convulsed with laughter against each other until suddenly their eyes locked and her heart skipped a beat. Her laughter ceased when it really hit her that she was lying on top of Igor Karkaroff. Merlin's Beard, she was laying on top of Igor bloody Karkaroff! And his body felt incredible under her. One corner of his mouth began to turn up in a sly smile.

"Get up!" Severus snapped, pulling her up by the back of her coat and completely blowing the moment. She would have shagged that guy in the middle of the road if it hadn't been for Severus. She obeyed, having no other choice, and then he pulled Igor up by his collar and shoved him down the road while he and Natalia tried to stifle their giggles.**  
><strong>They walked in silence for the next block, and then Igor turned and winked mischievously at her before singing. "You're a rotter, Mr. Ginch…." Gales of laughter poured out of her. No one before or since had ever made her laugh like that. He sang all the way back to the ship only lowering his voice, as they got closer but never stopping. They hustled him onto the ship and into his cabin as he sang his 'big finish'. **  
>"<strong>You're a three decker sauerkraut and toadstool sandwich…with arsenic saaaaaaaaauce!"

As soon as he finished, Severus pushed him down onto his bunk. "Jackass! Come on, Natalia, Let's go."

"Wait." Natalia didn't want to leave him. He looked like such an adorable rake, passed out with a sweetly peaceful expression, dark waves of locks skimming his forehead.

His eyes were closing but he managed a drunken smile for her before passing out completely. Gently, she pulled off his boots and set them by the foot of his bed. His hair was over one eye and she couldn't resist moving it for him. She reached over carefully, not wanting him to know, thinking herself quite slick. As soon as she touched it, his hand shot up and grabbed hers, and the sound of flesh smacking flesh cracked across the room; his reflexes were well honed, as any quidditch player's would be. He resumed his drunken smile and laughed softly. "You think I'm good looking, don't you?"

Knowing he would certainly not flirt with her if he was sober, and knew who she was, she resisted his flirtation for the first time that night. "No, you have shit in your hair from when you fell."

Obviously he found her lie unconvincing, for he laughed again. The melody of his laughter charmed her further still. "You're cute. What's your name?" He slurred.

Natalia became flustered, knowing couldn't tell him who she really was. If he asked around about her, people would tell him she was poor, with no connections, and working several jobs just to pay tuition. It would be preferable to keep this memory as a beautiful illusion than to disappoint him. So she said the first name that came to mind. "My name is Minerva McGonagall. Come on, Severus, let's go."

They managed to tiptoe off the ship without notice, much to their surprise after Igor's singing. It was still a half hour prior to lights, out so they would be able to slip back into the dormitory without questions. Severus stewed in silence as they walked up the hill. Natalia mistook his silence for anger over being called a Grinch. Severus, however, was stewing his sadness, not his anger. He was losing Lily, their friendship that had once been so strong was now halfhearted on her side. He was facing the reality of a class system, unwritten, unacknowledged by some, however terribly and sadly real. It frustrated him to feel so powerless. Now he could see another friend, similarly situated walking into the same horrendous disaster. He watched her in the moonlight, smiling to herself and periodically gazing up at the moon. She looked so innocent, like a lamb before killing. He wished someone would have stopped him, offered advice. So he tried. "He was quite intoxicated tonight."

"I noticed." Her tone was flat, unconcerned.

"You know, this may have gone differently if he was sober." He rolled eyes at himself for pointing out the obvious.

She stopped to face him, and the sadness in her expression made him regret beginning this conversation. He should have let her dream, just a little longer. "Please don't lecture me, Severus. I'm well aware of my lack of pedigree. It's pointed out to me on a daily basis, so your input in unnecessary." She turned to continue up the hill but he grabbed her hand.

"I'm only saying this because I don't want to see you hurt." He nearly choked on his own honesty.

His concern for her gave her a warm feeling and she softened her expression. "Thank you, Severus. But I can handle it."

He merely nodded in response, knowing that in such matters, all advice was useless. They parted ways in the common room. Natalia found sleep difficult that night, but when she did sleep, she dreamed of him.

The following morning Igor stopped by the Slytherin table to chat with Regulus Black. He trudged up to the group, looking rough with bloodshot eyes, a pained expression, and minor bed head.

"Oh look, the creature from the black lake lives." Regulus slapped him on the back. "And how are we feeling today?"

Igor responded only with a groan, and rubbed his temples while downing coffee before anything else. He helped himself to a large plate of food, took two bites and then pushed it away, obviously suffering from a raging hangover. It was certainly well deserved.

He sighed heavily and scanned the room apparently looking for someone. "I met the most incredible witch last night. I had the dirtiest dream about her. Merlin she was foxy."

'Foxy,' Natalia smirked to herself at his nerdy slang, it was, however, the seventies. His comment about the dirty dream thrilled her for years when she thought about it.

This caught the other boy's attention and he continued with his story. They were hanging on his every word with rapt attention as usual. "Great eyes. Amazing rack. I can't remember what her ass looked like but I remember feeling it and it was tight." That was such a lie. He did not. It made her giggle. "Lean, mean and not too far in between."

Severus caught her eye and she quickly looked down at her plate for fear of blowing it. He kicked her under the table but she couldn't look up.

"Damn, she smelled good too." He stretched out his long arms while arching his back, then ran his fingers through his thick mass of bed headed hair. "Like Lavender."

Natalia dared to sneak another glance at Lucius who was now glaring at her. She quickly looked back at her plate, fearful that he would figure it out and disapprove.

Regulus, always loving a bit of gossip, pressed him further. "Tell me Karkaroff, what is the name of this beauty with the…as you so eloquently put it…amazing rack."

He sighed and smiled looking off into the distance. "Minerva McGonagall."

"Bahahaha!" The table erupted in laughter; Natalia finally let go as well, figuring it was save to join in now. Even Severus smiled.

Igor loved to laugh, but loathed to be laughed at. And that was exactly what they were doing now. "What's so funny?" He growled, now looking like a little boy about to throw a tantrum.

But no one could answer him, no one could speak they were laughing so hard. Regulus finally collected himself. "You moron. Do you see the professor in the green robes with the tartan?"

"The wrinkly old bag?"

"Yes." He giggled through tears. "THAT is Minerva McGonagall."

"What?" Igor stared at McGonagall in shock as the boys disintegrated into fits of laughter again. "Well that wasn't her." He deadpanned.

"You got scammed my friend. Are you sure it was even a woman? Are you sure it wasn't a trannie?" Regulus slapped the table and then leaned back. He lost his balance and fell off the bench, and the boys were in hysterics.

Igor hung his head a bit, again loathing to be laughed at. "Snape, you were there? Who was the girl?"

Severus faked a surprised look and shrugged. "I was in the lab last night I don't know what you're talking about." Natalia figured he must have still been fuming over the Grinch thing.

Igor fumed. "Fuck all of you." Then he stormed out of the great hall.

Severus winked at her as the boys continued to crack jokes at Igor's expense. The moment was priceless. Later, when she told him about it, he swore he knew it was she all along, but he was full of shit. It was part of his charm.


	5. Chapter 5 Love Reign On Me

CHAPTER FIVE

Love, Reign O'er Me

Natalia spent the rest of the morning in the library, attempting and failing to finish her charms essay. Try as she might, she could not focus on her schoolwork after the encounter with Igor that morning. He dreamed about her. While she was thinking of him the night before, he was dreaming of her, a naughty dream no less. If she had been a girl of impressive background, or even of middle class background, she might have revealed herself. There may have been a chance. However, her social and economic peril made that option quite impossible. She knew what would happen if she did.

The door to the library opened, and several Drumstrang boys entered. A boisterous lot, they never seemed to be able to go anywhere without a commotion, and the Liberian was already shushing them. They settled in with the Lestrange brothers at the table across from hers. The boys grumbled their greetings to one another, none of them pleased to be studying on the weekend.

"Where's Karkaroff? Still sleeping it off?" asked Rabastan. Natalia strained to hear the answer.

One of Igor's better friends, Levin answered him. "He was up, but then went back to bed. He was aaahhhhh…p'yan v stl'ku." He waved his hand about, struggling every now and then with English slang. "Drunk down to his very soul. What a dumb shit! After that quidditch debacle, he's supposed to be writing an essay begging Headmaster to let him stay. I asked how it was coming this morning, and he said he refuses to write it."

"It's just lip service. What's the big deal?" Rudolphus leaned back in the chair and shrugged.

"You know how cocky his brother was. He's just as bad. He's angry about that girl giving him the wrong name, angry about his quidditch performance, and whatever else is offending his vanity."

"Defying Oblonsky, there's a sure way to a quick trip home."

"No doubt. His father will murder him."

"Well, let's hope he gets the boot before we play Drumstrang in quidditch." Rabastan laughed.

"Yeah. Then I can swoop in and bag this bird that smells like lavender." Rudolphus added. It seemed he was always thinking of sex, even when Bella Black was not around.

The boys began to snicker as the librarian shushed them again. Natalia was horrified. Igor wanted to leave and it was partly her fault. Not only was he never going to be hers, now he was so angry, he was going to get himself kicked out of school. She had to think of a way to fix this mess she created. The last thing she wanted was for him to leave. If we would not write the essay, she would. Immediately she shut her charms textbook and set about the task. Rarely had words flowed so freely from her quill but today she was divinely inspired.

When she finished, she reread the letter and made some edits. When she was finally satisfied, she sealed and addressed it. Then she began to worry. What if Igor changed his minds and wrote the essay himself? That would never do. If Oblonsky received two letters, Igor would be in even more trouble. She had no choice but to write and tell him what she did. Though this letter was far shorter, she struggled with what to say. She was speaking directly to him and that made her nervous. She decided to write as honestly as possible, knowing she would not sign it anyway. As soon as she was finished, she ran off to the owlery to mail her correspondence.

Lucius sat in the courtyard on the hard stone bench re-reading and making changes to his charms essay. He was a perfectionist when it came to schoolwork. He was extremely competitive in his own right, and would have been successful in any situation, but the pressure of being a Malfoy made him even more determined to be at the top of all his classes. It was imperative that he be at the top in every aspect of school life and for the most part, he succeeded.

In his opinion, he was quite unsuccessful with women. His marriage to Narcissa Black, though not officially arranged, was essentially a forgone conclusion. She was a lovely girl, but she merely tolerated him. Since their forth year, he had tried to make something more of their friendship, but to no avail. She was kind but cool to him, possibly resentful of the fact that she, like he, had no say in the matter. He watched his friends enjoy relationships with girls to whom they were genuinely attracted. They had fun together; they enjoyed each other's company. With he and Narcissa, it was always a bit of a charade. On the surface, they were a couple, but that was where it ended. If he was lucky, at the end of a date she might grant him a chaste peck of a kiss, but only if people were watching. Narcissa was brought up to consider appearances as well. Their time together always left him with a hollow feeling.

As he gazed across the grounds, he noticed Natalia coming back from the owlery. He knew she had no family and never noticed her writing to anyone. Immediately, he was intrigued. All morning, since hearing Karkaroff describe his mystery girl, he'd had a sneaking suspicion that it was Natalia. Her skin always smelled of lavender. What could someone like her want with someone like Karkaroff? Could she possibly prefer a foreigner to a Malfoy? Neither one would dare acknowledge her publicly, so what could the attraction be? As he turned this over in his mind, he watched her walk across the courtyard to the entrance closest to Slytherin. Her cloak blew back and he was able to see the outline of her young form. She had an athletic build with small but firm breasts. Her sweater and jeans were last years, and fit her snuggly since she had grown. He tingled a bit below the waist as he studied her flat stomach and thought about what it felt like to run his hands beneath her sweater.

Quickly, he gathered his book and followed her, having no problem catching up with her. "Whom were you writing to?" He asked as soon as he was walking beside her.

She jumped and her hand was on her throat. "Oh, Lucius, you scared me." His eyes met hers with an intensity that signaled something other than just lust, but she could not identify it. "I was…just writing to a friend." It wasn't really a lie.

"Friend?" He raised his eyebrows.

"Yes. Nancy, from the orphanage." Now she was lying.

"A muggle?" The distain in his voice was obvious.

"Yes."

"Hmmm. I wondered if you might be writing to Karkaroff."

Her heart started beating faster. This would never do to have him aware of what happened yesterday, much less the letters she wrote. She kept her voice light, feigning disinterest. "Why would I write to him?"

"You tell me."

This was not a conversation she wanted to linger over in the least. "Lucius, I don't know what you're getting at, but I have to go finish my Charms essay."

"It was you wasn't it?"

"What was me?" She quickened her pace but he trotted along by her side like a Labrador.

"Last night, with Karkaroff. You're the girl he was talking about at breakfast."

"Phfft" She snorted, hoping she wounded convincing. "Don't be ridiculous."

As they passed a nearby alcove, he grabbed her and pushed her against the wall. Firm, but gentle, he was trying not to hurt her. "Do you think I'm stupid? I've seen the way you look at him. He knew what you smelled like too. Lavender, I thought only I knew how lovely your scent is." He moved inches from her face with cat like grace.

She had to be careful with him. He could make life difficult if angry. She looked into his eyes and kept her expression as kind as she was able to manage. "Lucius, there must be a hundred girls that use lavender scented soap. He was referring to someone else."

He met her eyes for several seconds while attempting to detect dishonesty. "So there is nothing between you?"

"No." She smiled, relieved that she was nearly out of the woods with this discussion.

"Good." He breathed as leaned in and kissed her neck. Her eyes turned upward looking at nothing and her skin nearly crawled in disgust at her situation. "I want you to myself."

He was now desperately horny after an entire day of denial with Narcissa and now confirmation from his mistress that she was his alone. She actually merely confirmed that there was nothing presently going on with this particular man, not that she belonged to him. However his ego was large enough that he didn't realize it. His lips trailed upwards until he reached her lips. However he didn't get to kiss them for long before she moved her head to the side and away from him.

"It looks like you dropped quite a bit of cash in Hogsmeade yesterday."

He pulled his head back and examined her again. "So?"

"So do you have any money, or did you spend it all?"

He smirked at he, knowing exactly where she was going with it. He had no money at the moment, and would not receive anymore until tomorrow when his allowance arrived. He was regretting spending so much money yesterday to impress others, especially Narcissa who remained perpetually unimpressed.

He traced the outline of her breast with his fingers, hoping to arouse her. "Surely, you would allow me to pay you tomorrow."

Abruptly, she pushed him off, and he was jerked out of his fantasy rather than being jerked off by it. "Cash only." Miraculously, he let her pass. She did not stop shaking until she was safely back in the girls dorm, safe from his advances.

Lucius watched her walk away and slouched back down against the wall. Just once, he wished someone would like him for some reason other than his money. Even the girl on the lowest rung of the social ladder had no use for him. What was so different about him that prevented him from receiving true affection? He felt he had a good heart, though no one would have agreed with him.

Igor sulked in his quarters after breakfast. His long legs stretched out across his bed, as he lay on his back rubbing his throbbing head. Normally things came so easily to him, but since arriving at Hogwart,s nothing was going his way. From the time he was very young, he had always been graced by the lavish attentions of the fairer sex. It mattered not who they were, girls his age, his sisters, his mother, his grandmother and their friends all found him charming. Since arriving in this foreign land, he was merely a curiosity. Although girls looked at him, and found him handsome, they didn't respond to his charms. It was almost as if he was somehow forbidden to them. At first, he was perplexed, but through his dealings with the Slytherin boys, the only house he cared to associate with, he learned that it was due to his ethnicity. It didn't matter that his ancestors could be traced back from generation to generation, all pure in magical blood and prominent in their part of the world. Here, he was a foreigner, an outsider and it was a new experience for him. He'd never been on the outside, ever, and he didn't like it.

The only thing that infuriated him more than those English limeys laughing at him was his own reaction. They had gotten the better of him, and he let his frustration show. Had he not been still slightly buzzed at breakfast, that would never have happened, and he cursed himself for the lapse. Then there was Oblonsky's humiliating wrath on the quidditch field, his drunken behavior at The Three Broomsticks, and this essay he was now required to write. He was not about to kowtow to that tyrant. If Oblonsky wanted to kick him out of this miserable place, all the better. All he wanted to do was go home and see his family. He missed the familiarity of his home and country, his mother, his siblings and most of all the land they lived on. He would happily spend his days flying and hunting in the woods on their property that extended for miles, and forget all about Drumstrang. However, he knew that if he did return, his father would ensure that the homecoming was not pleasant. Alexei Karkaroff expected much from his children, and was especially hard on his sons.

On top of everything, there was this mystery girl that had him wondering. Who could she be? His memory was vague, and despite his best efforts he could only recall generalities of her appearance and manner. He did not recall much of her physically, but what was permanently sealed into his psyche was the way she made him feel. After months of social isolation from female company, her gentle attention was a welcome change. He recalled her laughter, how she responded to him, how her arduous looks warmed his heart. He remembered how her hand felt grazing his forehead, and the pleasant smell of lavender on her wrists, delicious lavender that reminded him of warm summer afternoons. He didn't know who she was, but he was infatuated, and dying to learn her true identity. Obviously, and unfortunately, she thought him a joke. Why else would she lie about who she was? Merely another English aristocrat finding it amusing to toy with a foreign boy's affection. He'd seen similar situations with some of his friends. Still, he could not drive her out of his mind. So he lay there, with a pounding headache, trying to decide if it was worth it or not.

There was a scratching sound at the portal of his cabin and he looked to see a tiny white owl, no bigger than his hand, perched on the sill with a letter attached to his leg. He was surprised to receive a letter, normally his family wrote to him only once a week and he had already received a letter three days prior. He opened the window and the little bird waddled around to greet him. "Halloo, little one." Wildlife had always interested him and he held out the back of his hand for the bird to perch upon. It obliged, and he pulled the bird inside and set it down on his desk. "Let's see what you have for me, my friend." He undid the letter and read.

_Dear Igor,_

_ I hope you are feeling better, but judging by your state last night, I am not terribly optimistic. By now you know my name is not Minerva McGonagall. I sincerely apologize for lying to you, but at the time, for many reasons I cannot explain, I felt I had no choice. I hope you can find it in your heart to forgive me. _

_ I hear that you wish to leave school, and that is why I am writing to you now. Your education is paramount. I know the people at this school can be difficult, but do not let them trouble you. I've watched you since you arrived, and what I see is an intelligent, enthusiastic, athleti,c and charming young man. You are so full of promise, and a fine education will ensure you attain your full potential. I know you are angry at the moment, at me for my lie, at the Hogwarts boys, and at your Headmaster. I fear in your anger and hung over state, you may not make the wisest decision for your future. So I have taken the liberty of writing to your Headmaster on your behalf. I apologize now. I know it's an enormous intrusion into your life that I have no right to make, but I feel compelled. I just don't want you to go. Not yet. _

_ Sincerely,_

_ MM_

_P.S. I did mention in my letter to your Headmaster that if he started you against Slytherin, you would be formidable and they would all fear the name Drumstrang. I'm afraid that throws the gauntlet down and he will expect much of you. I have faith that you will not disappoint. Tell no one of this._

Igor reread the letter several times searching for some clue as to this mystery girl's identity, but found none. The script was not overly flourished as some girls might be, but concise and perfectly correct. There was nothing unusual about the parchment, nothing to mark it as belonging to anyone in particular. However, when he held it closer, the aroma of lavender was unmistakable. It was most certainly hers. He now knew one thing for sure. He did not dream her. She was very real, and here at Hogwarts. That alone was reason enough to make him want to stay.

The door burst open and Oblonsky entered his room without knocking. He towered over Igor, glaring at him. Igor remained silent, not knowing what to expect. "You can stay." This brought a sigh of relief from Igor and he nodded at his Headmaster. "But you're no longer our starting seeker." Igor tried to keep his expression stoic, but was devastated. His father had been so proud of him being the starting seeker for his alma mater at such a young age. Not only would he be disappointed, his older brother Konstantine would laugh at him. He would almost rather be kicked out than to face the two of them with this information. "You may play beater. But if you bungle the next game, you're out. I shouldn't have started you so young anyway. However your brother was the best seeker in Drumstrang history, I thought you might possess the same ability." Without another word, he left the room.

Igor walked back over to his bed and flopped down face first with a groan. He pulled the pillow over the back of his face and hoped his head would stop hurting long enough for him to fall asleep again. Dreams of lavender girl would help him escape from his troubles.

_NA: Oh Natalia, she just doesn't know when to let it go. And that smarmy Lucius? Do you feel sorry for him yet? Maybe just a little? Nahhhhhh he's a bastard. Can't wait to write the Slytherin v Drumstrang match. Who do you think should win?_

_As you can see, I re-grouped on the vantage point of the story. Thanks to all for being patient during this process. Please review and let me know your thoughts!_

_Thank you to my most wonderfully awesome beta Jamberine, who re-beta'ed the re-write. Everyone go read her stories right now and leave her tons of well-deserved, fantastic reviews!_

_PS—I now have a facebook page under the name Sasha Smith (Sasha Malfoy was taken WTF?) I'll be posting some visual aids and would love to chat if any of you are game._


	6. Chapter 6 Carry on Wayward Son

CHAPTER SIX

Carry on Wayward Son

Although Sasha did not speak to Igor, she knew he was permitted to remain at school, as the Slytherin boys gossiped like a bunch of hens in the common room. They were very concerned with him playing beater in the match on Saturday. Obviously Oblonsky had something up his well-tailored sleeve. They prepared and plotted to gang up on him while Natalia eavesdropped unnoticed in a corner of the common room. As usual, she was practically invisible to them.

After their encounter, Natalia was more infatuated with Igor than ever. If he were in the same room, she found it difficult to take her eyes off him. However, she had to lest Lucius become suspicious. Igor seemed to be wondering about her as well. Any time he was close to a member of the opposite sex, she observed him closing his eyes and inhaling, trying to find the girl who smelled like lavender. She switched to an unscented soap to avoid detection, but every time she saw him do this, she felt close to him. However, she knew it was only a matter of time before this faded, and he moved on.

With end of term exams quickly approaching, Natalia spent more time in the library with Severus. Sasha Malfoy would often accompany them, no doubt a futile attempt to get Severus to notice her. At least, Natalia reasoned, she wasn't that pathetic. Or maybe she was. At that moment Igor strolled into the library with a book under his arm, appearing to assess the social possibilities of the room, rather than looking for a place to study. He spied Sasha at their table and joined them. Natalia flushed and looked down at her book.

"Hi Sasha." He nudged her flirtatiously.

"Hello." She replied coolly, eyes still on her book.

He stared at her for a moment, and then leaned in. Natalia noticed him inhaling deeply, trying to smell Sasha's fragrance. Then his face changed and a smile graced his beautiful lips. "You smell good." While his speech was normally more flowery, when he wanted something, he was direct.

Sasha gave him a look that showed she was clearly annoyed. "Thanks." She replied flatly before going back to her book.

"Is that lavender?" He moved his face closer to her, and licked his lips nervously.

"Yes." Sasha smiled, now enjoying the flattery, particularly if it was done in front of Severus. "Do you like it?"

Igor was now grinning from ear to ear, and beaming at the lavender girl he thought he'd finally found. Natalia clenched her jaw as she watched him slip away from her. Mentally, she was prepared for it, but that didn't make her any happier about it.

"Sasha, there's something I've been meaning to ask you."  
>"What's that?"<p>

"Will you go to the Yule Ball with me?" Igor watched Sasha hopefully for a reaction. Sasha's eyes went to Severus, to see if he would be bothered by the question. Severus watched Natalia, feeling terrible for her, and wishing she had listened to him. Natalia stared at her book, but now had no idea what she was looking at.

"Uhm," Sasha hesitated. "I don't know." She stammered while watching Severus for any kind of reaction, but he made none. As always, he was indifferent to her.

A lump formed in Natalia's throat as she realized that he must not remember any other detail about her if he could mistake Sasha for her. They were nothing alike in looks or demeanor, much less status.

However, they were more alike than either realized. For both of them admired men that not interested in them.

"Please, Sasha, it would mean the world to me." Igor whispered softly. Natalia found it endearing that he could be so tender when it came to matters of the heart. Why couldn't he be speaking to her?

Sasha looked back once more at Severus who still had his nose in the book before giving her answer. "All right then."

"Wonderful!" Igor stood up abruptly. He was desperate to get out of there for he hadn't planned conversation with his lavender girl any farther than this. He backed up several steps towards the door before tripping over a chair. He fell against a table knocking a large stack of books over. Natalia found this adorable and snickered at him while Sasha rolled her eyes. He was obviously embarrassed and scrambled out the door.

Finally Severus looked up from his book. "What on earth have you done to that poor boy?"

"No idea." Sasha sighed. She really had no idea whatsoever.

"It seems he finds himself under the heady intoxication of lavender." Though speaking to Sasha, he looked directly at Natalia.

"Hmm, it's a bit strong for my taste." She mused while sniffing her wrists. "I much prefer floral fragrances. Lucius gave it to me as an early Christmas present and I didn't want to disappoint him by not wearing it."

_Bastard! _ Obviously this was an attempt to throw Igor off the trail, and Lucius had used his own sister in his plot. Natalia made a vow to retaliate. She knew she would have to be very sneaky. She would have to be under the radar, but she was going to make sure that karma bit Lucius right in the arse.

On the day of the Drumstrang vs. Slytherin match, Natalia managed to weasel her way into attending to the Drumstrang team in the event of any injuries. Although she was rather tall, these boys, including Igor, towered over her on the sidelines. She wondered what they were feeding the Drumstrang boys that made them so much beefier than their English counterparts. Igor was permitted to start as beate,r while an older boy took his place at seeker. He didn't seem to mind but on the contrary, was very focused on the task at hand. The match hadn't gone on for more than a few minutes when he was double-teamed by the LeStrange brothers. As he swung his arm back for a shot, Rudolphus ran over it while Rabastan came in from the opposite direction and spun him out. Igor was left hanging onto his broom by one leg and one arm, as the broom went into a tailspin heading towards the ground. The crowd gasped when he hit the dirt with a thud and lay there unmoving. Madame Hooch quickly stopped the game and Oblonsky ran onto the field followed by Natalia.

"Karkaroff!" Oblonsky slapped Igor's cheek lightly, trying to rouse him. "Karkaroff, can you hear me?" Igor did not respond, and Natalia's heart sank. "Igor!" Oblonsky slapped his face a little harder and mumbled something in their native language. For a moment, there was no response, but then he moved his head from side to side, groaning while he opened his eyes. "Are you alright? That was quite a fall my boy."

"My ankle." He winced. "Hurts."

"Alright. Let's get you to the bench." Oblonsky began to help him up. "Come on girl, help us."

Natalia placed herself under his arm, and helped him limp off the pitch to the cheers of fans.

"How could you be so careless?" Oblonsky berated him as they walked. "You should have seen those two coming a mile away. You play like a rookie."

Igor gritted his teeth as he bore his Headmaster's wrath. Once again, he had failed this man, and there would be hell to pay. Surely he would be on his way home before the end of the day in complete disgrace

When they got to the bench, Hooch blew the whistle and the match was back on. Oblonsky turned his back on them, resuming his duties as coach. Natalia knelt before him, pulled off his boot, and began to examine his injuries.

"Can you move it?"

He winced as he tried to move his ankle. Although unsure if it was a break or a sprain, he was sure it would keep him out of the game until he could see the healer. The ankle pain, however, was nothing compared to the humiliation he would soon feel when his father learned of this. Vladmir Karkaroff did not tolerate failure.

The young girl from Slytherin, who was triaging minor injuries, was before him, much to his annoyance, and examining his ankle. She was skinny and her hair was cut in an unfashionable manner, completely unlike the other beauties of her house. She did not look at him but began assessing his ankle. One positive thing he noticed was the way that she handled his foot. Life at an all male school meant that they were all treated roughly, but her gentle touch reminded him of the careful attention his mother always gave him. Generally, he was the type to make a snap judgments, and in her case the verdict was; 'not much to look at, but I like her anyway.'

"How bad is it?"

Natalia traced her wand over his injuries, but did not make eye contact. "I'm afraid it's broken."

"Brilliant." He snapped. "That means I'm benched for the entire match, and now I won't have an opportunity to redeem myself." He growled and slouched on the bench.

Natalia felt guilty for writing the letter to Oblonsky. She was responsible for the high expectations, and now searched for a way to make amends.

"I can fix it if you want." She somehow found the courage to meet his eyes. "I'm not really supposed to without Poppy, but I'm sure I can handle it."

He appreciated her effort, particularly since she was from the rival team and could have easily let him suffer. He answered her with a shrug. "Well, if you muck it up, I suppose it can be fixed. Give it a go, if you wish. I won't tell." He was anxious to get back in the game.

She waved her wand, and whispered the incantation. He grunted as the bone abruptly refused under her spell. But then the pain vanished, and he circled his ankle around without trouble. She smiled at him and he looked into her eyes. There was something familiar about her, something comfortable but he couldn't put his finger on it. "All right then? Stand up slowly. Can you walk on it without pain?" By some small miracle, he stood and walked as if nothing was ever wrong.

"Good as new." He was amused that this girl was so confident, and talented. Drumstrang didn't exactly teach women's lib in 1974. "Thank you. Can you fix my strategy too?"

"Maybe. Sit back down." Intrigued, he obeyed, and she pretended to examine his ankle again.

Natalia did not look up but moved her head closer to him and said in a low voice, "The Slytherin Keeper is Regulus Black. If you watch him, you'll see he keeps glancing to his left side. That's because he's looking at his girlfriend in the Slytherin box. She's sitting next to another bloke and he's hitting on her. If you're quick, you can sneak in on his right and score."

Igor grinned broadly, although she couldn't see him. He was excited about her game plan, and more anxious than ever to jump back in. "Ahh, I'll remember that." His grin was broad. He liked this girl more every moment.

Natalia continued with the most important information. "And Lucius Malfoy, he's one of the beaters,"

"The blonde, yes I know Lucius." He was completely focused on her now.

"Right. He has an ego bigger than your mother Russia. He loathes to be laughed at. If you can do something to make him look foolish, he'll get angry. He will lose focus and not be able to get out of his own head. Then you can walk all over him."

Igor was always looking for angles, the root cause of issues, and wasn't totally ready to believe her. "This is interesting advice, but I don't understand. Why would you tell me something to help us win? You're in Slytherin aren't' you?"

"Yes. They're downright impossible to live with. I hope you take them out."

He lowered his head until she looked up at him, and then turned on his charm full blast. "Your wish is my command, fair lady."

Natalia felt goose bumps go down her arm, and knew her face must be as red as a beet.

Igor jumped up, and ran down the sideline to the Headmaster, who immediately slapped him on the back and told him to get back in the game. Natalia watched him take off while 'Knights in White Satin' played in her mind again. She shook her head to get the song out, and set about pouring water into cups for the substitutes.

Igor was a major factor in the rest of the match. He was able to run up the score by 60 points on Regulus before the Slytherin keeper figured it out, and was able to block him. When it became apparent that Regulus was on to him, he went after Lucius, much to the enjoyment of Natalia. He was able to swoop in behind the blond beater and yank off his cape. Lucius face contorted in anger. He was furious, and went zooming after him, leaving the other beater alone. Igor, however, was extremely agile and outmaneuvered him, bringing cheers from not only the Drumstrang boys, but also loud roars from the Gryffindor, Hufflepuff, and Ravenclaw boxes. The attention fueled his bravado, and he doubled back and dangled the cape like a matador in front of a bull. Lucius went after him again, but Igor darted out of the way and whipped the cape over his head with a flourish, laughing all the while. The crowd went wild with laughter and even the players were distracted. So much so, that the new Drumstrang seeker was able to capture the golden snitch and the game was over.

Again, the crowd went wild! The seeker descended to the ground, followed by his teammates who jumped on him, whooping and cheering after their decisive victory. Lucius stormed back and forth on the Slytherin sideline, red-faced, and screaming at his teammates. Most of them did not respond except Regulus, who didn't take that type of behavior from anyone. He shoved Malfoy and pointed to Igor. Natalia could make out a few words, "Vanity," "Idiot," "You fucked up, Malfoy!" Lucius growled and ran out onto the field, eyes wild with fury.

Karkaroff barely had time to look over his shoulder before Lucius sucker punched him and the fight was on. The first punch caused him to stagger back and fall against his teammates, but he quickly recovered, pouncing on Lucius. He knocked him to the ground and began slugging away at him. The Slytherin team charged the field to jump into the fray. Before anyone realized what was happening, it was complete mayhem. Natalia watched the bench-clearing brawl, wide-eyed and secretly thrilled to see Igor getting the better of Lucius. Out of the corner of her eye, she saw Sirius Black jump out of the Gryffindor box and join the fight to help his brother, Regulus. It was merely seconds before Potter and Lupin threw themselves into the mix as well. It seemed to go on forever, but really, it was merely a few minutes.

"Imobulus!" Dumbledore's angry voice bellowed across the pitch, and all the brawling boys were suspended in mid fight. He and a smirking Oblonsky had a brief discussion, then began unhexing students one by one, and sending them back to their quarters. Lucius emerged with a bloody nose. Igor was obviously the toast of Drumstrang as his comrades slapped him on the back and congratulated him.

_AN: Ha—she got him! And she has Igor a little interested now. What do you think he will do next? Hope you all were good with the re-write. Please leave a desperate author a review. I'm dying to know what you think so far._

_Happy Birthday to Pedja Bjelac (6/30) still a hottie. _

_Happy Independence Day weekend to my American buddies! Hope you are eating burgers and watermelon under the fireworks_

_Pssst! Did you see Alan Rickman is doing Broadway this fall! (AAAACCCCKKKK!) Who's going?_


	7. Chapter 7 The Stroke

CHAPTER SEVEN

The Stroke

The music was pounding in the Great Hall and everyone seemed to be enjoying themselves. Although his date was by far the most beautiful, Igor wasn't satisfied on the evening of the Yule Ball. He didn't know if it was because she was not his lavender girl, or if he'd just built this mystery girl up in his mind so much, that no one could live up to his expectations. Further perturbing him was her perfume, which did not smell remotely like lavender. It was floral, sickeningly sweet, and applied far to liberally in his opinion. As the evening wore on, he disengaged himself from her, and slouched on a bench against the wall, pouting like a spoiled child.

His friend Levin was enjoying dancing with not only his own date, but also Sasha, who didn't seem to miss Igor one bit. Levin was hitting it off with both girls, but worried about his friend. He was a country lad, less wealthy and sophisticated than many of his classmates. He possessed a kind heart, and hated to see anyone left out of such merriment. He was also a little worried that Igor might think he was trying to hit on his date. So when the girls went to the loo, together of course, he bounded over to see his friend.

"Everything all right comrade?" He plopped himself down on the bench next to his friend and they watched the crowd together. Levin pulled a handkerchief out of his pocket and mopped sweat from his forehead. His dark hair was a little shaggy in front, and he used a bit of perspiration to push it off his face.

"Yes, I'm fine." Igor smiled at his friend's concern. He felt fortunate to have someone he could trust. Sometimes Drumstrang was like a den of vipers, and since arriving at Hogwarts, they'd become even worse. "I'm just not in the mood to party tonight."

"What's wrong with you? Sasha Malfoy is beautiful, loads of fun too. I'm sure your father would approve."

Igor scowled at the mention of his father. "She is certainly all of those things, but there is something…missing."

"Keep sneaking her firewhiseky, it won't be missing for long." Levin snickered and elbowed his friend, trying to get him to laugh.

But Igor was not in the mood, and his reply was flat. "Don't be crass. Sasha is a lady. I won't treat her like that."

"Why not?" Levin snorted. "You treat all other women like that."

Igor narrowed his eyes appearing perturbed but was merely surprised. It never occurred to him that he had a reputation for treating girls badly. He always liked their company, and perhaps he allowed their attentions to go further than he should. He truly enjoyed witches and couldn't seem to help himself. It was never his intent to hurt anyone. He liked the way they smelled, the softness of female lips on his, the small of a slender girl's back. Why shouldn't he enjoy the pleasures this life was affording him? He was usually the one to end it however, tiring easily of them as he did. Someone more beautiful, more interesting, more exciting would come along and he would find himself entangled with another before bothering to extract himself from his current situation. Perhaps he had done it enough to develop this reputation that Levin now referred to.

"So you are of the opinion that I am a scoundrel?"

"Scoundrel is a bit harsh. I would say playboy."

"What is this 'playboy'? I'm not understanding you."

"You play around, but are never serious."

Igor considered this for a moment before responding. "I suppose that is a fair assessment." He watched the two girls dancing around, now flirting with the guitar player who was eyeing them. "Levin, my friend you are always honest with me. Do you know how rare and valuable that is?"

"I do. I'm not always sure you know it."

"Be sure. I know it." Igor nodded. "Would you give me your honest opinion on a matter that is vexing me?"

"Vexing you?" Levin eyed him with suspicion. "Nothing vexes you."

"Ahh, something vexes me tonight my friend."

"And what is that?"

"Sasha is not the girl who smelled of lavender."

"Not that again." Levin chuckled, enjoying seeing his frequently overconfident friend befuddled. "I'm beginning to doubt the existence of this girl. No one saw you together. You don't remember what she looks like, and no one has come forward."

"Well your comment about the way I treat women has me wondering. Do you think perhaps she may have heard I'm not the type to become serious, and that is why she hasn't revealed herself?"

"You are over thinking this my friend." Levin slapped him on the back. "She hasn't revealed herself because she doesn't exist. You were drunk, you passed out, and you dreamed this girl. Now let's get back to our dates before they end up backstage with these hacks." Levin got up to go back to the girls but Igor grabbed his arm.

"Levin," his tone was stern. "She was not a dream. She was very real. One day I will find this lavender girl and when I do, I'm going to marry her."

Igor's words gave his friend pause and his expression softened. He'd never seen Igor like this, so caring and sincere about another person other than his family. "All right my friend. I believe you. And when you find her, I'll be best man at your wedding. Deal?"

"Deal." Igor shook his hand, relieved to finally have an ally in this strange situation.

"Excellent, but for now, let's find our dates and finish the night off." And the two boys went off to rejoin their dates.

Natalia sat up in the Slytherin common room after everyone had gone to bed a long time ago. When all the girls were pouring back into the dormitory clucking like hens after the dance, she had sneaked away. She'd spent the evening in solitude, packing her trunk for the journey back to London tomorrow, and getting a jump on some of her readings for next term.

She sat in a large leather chair with her knees pulled up to her chin and stared into the window into the Black Lake, knowing Igor was asleep on the boat by now. She wondered if he had a good time with Sasha but really, why wouldn't he? She was pretty, rich, highly sought after by all the boys, everything that Natalia was not. What would the evening have been like if they were there together? Would he have enjoyed her company? Would he have held her close when they danced? Would he have kissed her?

She heard a noise behind her and turned to see Lucius stumbling down the stairs. His face lit up when he saw her, although the light was dimmed by drunkenness. A shiver immediately went down her spine and she cursed herself for being so stupid as to come down to the common room at this hour.

"Natalia. I didn't know you were up. Can't sleep?"

"Actually, I was just getting ready to turn in."

Lucius was too drunk to disguise his disappointment. He had a depressing night with Narcissa, and needed a friend, however despite his surface popularity, he had few. In his twisted mind, he viewed Natalia as a friend. She was sweet to him. She treated him with care. It did not occur to him in his drunken stupor that he paid her to be sweet and care. He thought he was just doing really well with her.

"Will you sit with me for a bit?" He asked softly, sounding slightly pathetic.

She sighed, knowing the true intent of his proposition.

He sensed her discomfort. "I'll sit away from you, and on my hands if you like."

Natalia smirked, but didn't leave. He took this as a good sign.

Lucius seated himself on the leather couch, facing the fireplace. "Incendio." With a graceful wave of his wand, the flames leapt up and warmed the room. Then he turned his attention to her. "You didn't attend the ball tonight."

"I wasn't asked," came her clipped reply.

"Hmmm." He frowned. "Lot's of people went alone." His ego was large enough that he assumed she was pouting over his not asking her. The thought began to excite him.

"I didn't have an appropriate dress. Besides, I need to study."

Her not having enough money for a dress, never occurred to him. He was fortunate enough that he never had to do without a thing. Poverty was merely a curiosity to him rather than a harsh reality. Something about her slight frame in the firelight made him want to take care of her.

"You could have asked me. I would have been happy to oblige."

His heart was sincere in that moment.

She glared at him. "I'll do what I have to do to continue my education, not for something frivolous like a new dress that I'll wear one time." She was initially insulted that he would think she would jack him off for a new dress. She quickly cooled as she realized that he had every right to assume that considering her conduct.

Lucius looked down to his lap, hoping she couldn't detect his embarrassment. He disgusted her. He was so revolting to her, that she wouldn't touch him unless she had to. In that moment, he was disgusted with himself. "Always practical." He tried to cover his hurt.

"I have to be. It's a matter of survival." She surprised herself in how Slytherin she sounded.

"Tell me, how much would it have cost me to have the honor of escorting you to the ball tonight?"

She shot a nasty look at him. "Is that a joke?"

"No." He tried to sound like his persona, hoping the conversation would begin to turn in his favor. Thus far, he was off balance. "I'm wondering if you are more expensive than my current girlfriend."

She raised her eyebrows. "I'm sure I am."

He was a bit drunk and the topic of conversation was making him ridiculously horny. After a lifetime of being catered to, she was exciting and different. One side of his mouth curved into a smile. He admired her moxie. "Well then, name your price."

She raised her chin in defiance. "Your social standing."

"Sorry?"

"It would cost you your social standing to be seen with me. So yes, I would say I am certainly more expensive than the stunning Miss Black."

He liked the idea of her being more costly, even though he knew he would never pay the price. "That's my problem, not yours. It wouldn't cost you a thing."

"Yes it would, my dignity."

His expression dissolved into embarrassment again. He looked down at his deep green monogrammed slippers and tapped his feet nervously. "Why do you say that to me? Do you hate me?"

"No. No Lucius, I don't hate you." It was true. Her opinion had softened a bit towards him once she realized he would not actually hurt her, and he would provide her with enough money to continue her education. All she had to do was provide him with occasional pleasure and release. "But when we're together, I hate myself." She was lowering herself to him, in order to keep the peace. He however, didn't view it in that light.

No one spoke to him like that, ever. He spent his whole life having people suck up to him. It was the worst thing anyone had ever said to him, and immediately he had a raging hard on. He went to her side. " I don't want to make you feel bad. You make me feel so good." Like so many other refined boys his age, his seduction techniques were rudimentary at best. He took her hand and placed it on his member. She tried to pull back, but he forced her to keep her hand there. "Please. Witch, you have no idea what you do to me. Get me off. I'm begging you." His breath was hot on her neck as he nuzzled against her.

"Lucius, it's late." She shut her eyes, knowing this would be the cherry on top of her rubbish sundae of an evening.

"I'll pay double." He grinned at her mischievously. "Come on. Right here in the common room. It could be fun."

'Fun for him,' she thought. "Are you mental? Someone could walk right in!"

"Everyone's asleep."

"They might wake up. I'm going to bed."

"Don't go Natalia! I need you."

"You have two hands, you don't need me."

He blinked, shock evident on his alabaster face. "Please, no one understands me like you do."

"Understand you?" She snorted. He was talking out of his head tonight.

"Yes. I can tell you things. I don't have to pretend with you."

"That's because my expectations for you are so low."

He frowned but was undeterred. "I suppose I deserve that."

"And more."

"Please, I'm so backed up." He shifted his position and began to move her hand over his harness.

She snorted. "That's your own fault." She ripped her hand away.

"Laugh if you want, I don't care. I'm at your mercy, just please…" he paused to examine her face, breathing hard and sporting tented pajama bottoms. "Please Natalia."

She looked at him thinking he looked rather sad. Despite her better judgment she felt sorry for him. He was unloved, just as she was. It's what made him such a bastard. Her resolve began to give way. He was very needy and it probably wouldn't take very long. "Double you say?"

"Yeah." He breathed. She looked over her shoulder, and when she was sure no one was coming, straddled him and slid her hand down his pajama bottoms. He was without undergarments and her fingers were immediately caressing his flesh. He moaned under her touch, relieved to finally be indulged.

She went straight to what she knew he loved. "Do you like this Lucius?" Her palm stoked the satiny smooth skin on his cock.

"Oh fuck, yes." He gritted his teeth, immediately close to the brink. Their titillating conversation after a night of Narcissa pressed against him on the dance floor had him halfway there already. "Harder witch." She obliged, ready for this to be over, and watched him as he threw his head back in ecstasy.

"Narcissa won't do this for you will she?"

"No, filthy cocktease. Only you." He tried desperately to keep his voice low. The riskiness of the location was only adding to the thrill of it.

"I want you to come for me Lucius."

"I want to. Make me come Natalia." She pumped him even harder but held back knowing what he needed to hear first. He shuddered under her touch, whimpering, begging for the release. "Say it. Ah, Merlin. Fuck, please, fucking say it."

"I love getting my hands on your enormous cock."

"Ahhhhh," he groaned quietly through his orgasm, his body quaking as he pulled her against him. He was silent for some time, stroking her hair. When she felt a decent interval had passed, she moved to pull away from him. "I love you Natalia." He always said that. She gave him a patronizing smile and began her dismount but he held her tightly. "No. I mean it. I really love you Natalia."

She wasn't sure how to take this. Obviously he was much drunker than she thought. "It's late Lucius. You should get some rest."

He stared at her in disbelief. He'd never told anyone except his mother and sister that he loved them. How could this nothing little waif of a witch not appreciate the magnitude of this moment? How dare she not be grateful for his declaration. She, a lowly orphan was being offered an opportunity of a lifetime but she was too full of populist arrogance to know it. "Is that all you have to say to me? I just told you I love you Natalia."

"Then start acting like it." She climbed off him and ascended the stairs to her room. Lucius remained on the couch, covered in his own seed and utterly destroyed.

_AN: So Igor is going to marry his lavender lady. Think he would still be interested if he knew what was going on in the Slytherin common room? And Lucius…the eternal question, does a shoddy upbringing excuse such deplorable behavior?_

_Big thanks to Wendy Waddles, Diana Pearl Gunn, Wolves-rain-chick, SweetieCherrie, Wombat88, EsmeScullyStarling, Shinoslisstlesister and my lovely, talented and always insightful beta Jamberine. Your support in this story is so motivating__ Big cyber hugs. I'm hoping to finish my other story Second Chances this week (just in time for the big premier) and then the updates for this one will come more frequently._


	8. Chapter 8 Is She Really Going Out w Him

CHAPTER EIGHT

Is She Really Going Out With Him?

Natalia spent a dismal Christmas break at the orphanage. It was a ridiculous place to be over the holidays. The place was filled with do-gooders who only showed their faces once a year so they could feel better about being so well off while others suffered. Why didn't they care the other 364 days of the year? Most of the children were about seeing what kind of loot they could score from these people. However muggle trinkets no longer held any charm for Natalia, and she kept to herself, reading in advance for next term. All she had going for her was her magical education, and she would take full advantage of the opportunity. Particularly now that she had to endure the seedy fondlings of Lucius to remain there.

When she returned, things settled down into the routine, the only difference now was that after the coupling required for the Yule Ball, there were lots more romances and mini-dramas going on. Even Lucius and Narcissa seemed to be getting along better after they attended the annual New Years Eve celebration at Malfoy Manor. Maybe he would finally start to leave her alone. Igor and Sasha were also rumored to be an item, although to the careful observer, their relationship seemed rather platonic on both sides.

Several weeks after start of term, Natalia was making her way back to Slytherin house after dinner when Igor suddenly blocked her path. She froze, and somewhere in her head the music started again, effing Moody Blues. He was at least six inches taller than she was, with a broad chest, which kept him from looking too skinny like Severus. His black wavy hair gracefully curled over the back of his collar, and he had about a days worth of charming stubble on his cheeks. He smiled at her thoughtfully, and when he did, those soulful brown eyes met hers and she was completely at his mercy.

"Hallo." His voice was warmer, softer than it was on the quidditch pitch.

Natalia froze while her head was screaming "Holy shit he just said 'Hallo' to me_." _She froze. Her mouth went completely dry and she couldn't answer him. Mercifully, he kept talking.

"Can I walk you back to Slytherin house?"

She nodded, still unable to speak, and totally blowing it. Their footsteps on the stone floor were the only sound as they walked without speaking. He watched her without being obvious. This girl that offered such confident advice on the pitch was nervous. He made her nervous. It was enchanting to him, and he was eager to put her at ease, so he searched for a non-threatening subject.

"You know, I didn't get a chance to properly thank you for your quidditch advice. I must admit I was surprised. Not many people will dare to cross Lucius Malfoy."

For some reason, she seemed to tense further. When she spoke again, her tone was vaguely angry. "He deserves it. Its time someone took him down a peg might as well be you. He's not a great as they all think he is. He knows it too, that's why he compensates by being a bully."

Obviously, he had struck a nerve. Why else would she react that way? Igor was always interested in human dynamics and psychology and was therefore fascinated to find someone else who put so much thought into such things. "Pretty insightful observation. I like that. You're a shrewd little thing, what's your name?"

She sighed and looked down for a moment, like she was avoiding the answer. He didn't responds, figuring if he let the silence drag on, she would eventually become uncomfortable with it and respond. "Natalia. Natalia Smith."

"Natalia." He nodded while considering the harmonious quality of her name. It rolled off his tongue in a natural way. "That's lovely. Was your mother Russian?"

"No. Well I don't know. I never knew my parents." She gulped. "I was raised in an orphanage."

For some reason, she seemed uncomfortable telling him this. It struck him as odd, though to him, this was not shameful. "I'm Igor Karkaroff."

"I know. I mean everyone knows who you are."

The poor thing was now stammering. She looked straight ahead but his eyes remained fixed on her, entranced by the way the pink flush was creeping him her neck.

It was not his intent to make this little girl uncomfortable, but he knew his size and good looks could rattle people at times, particularly guileless and sweet young girls like Natalia. He made an attempt at softening his expression before speaking again. "Why haven't we met before? You know, I never miss a party and I don't recall ever seeing you. After your Quidditch assistance, I looked for you at the Yule Ball, but I didn't see you."

She laughed nervously, still blushing. "I'm not much for parties. I study."

Now he was the one feeling off balance. Did she think he was stupid for going to parties? Unsure how to take her response, he paused. He didn't want to appear unserious about his studies, so he focused on schoolwork. "I like both. What's your favorite subject?"

She cleared her throat. "I like Defense against the Dark Arts."

"Why? I had you pegged for a future potions mistress." He continued to press.

She cringed and he immediately realized his error. Potions mistresses were known for being serious, disagreeable, and frequently unattractive, not something most girls aspired to be.

"Because I'm alone in the world. I have no protectors. I have to be self-reliant."

"Hmmm." Something about her slender frame and understated manner made him want to be that protector. "There's a bonfire tonight by the lake. You should come."

Her panicked expression told him that immediately, she was looking for a way to let him down easy. "I don't know."

"Ah, you have a boyfriend. I'm sorry. I don't mean to sound like I'm hitting on you." He shrugged, trying to appear nonchalant, rather than disappointed. "Bring him along."

She was still avoiding his eyes. "I don't have a boyfriend."

Despite trying to seem reserved, unconcerned even, he sighed heavily. He had royally botched this. "Then what's the problem? I thought we were getting on well."

"We are," she stammered.

"It's just a bonfire. Look if your uncomfortable, or you don't like me, just come anyway and bring some girlfriends." He knew this attempt to recover sounded pathetic but it was all he had left. He wasn't used to being rejected by women and didn't have any back up catch phrases in his lexicon. She looked straight ahead at the portrait, seemingly ignoring him. Now he was getting angry. Who did this little waif think she was? He was Igor Karkaroff. Who the hell was she? Some skinny little orphan with poor fashion sense, it was maddening. He decided to make one last attempt. As they reached the portrait he jumped in front of it, blocking her path.

"I'm not letting you in until you say you'll come. You were a friend to me, let me be a friend to you."

"Okay." She mumbled.

Victory at last! "I'm glad we met Natalia."

"Me too."

He let her by. What she didn't see as she walked away was him smelling the air behind her, searching for lavender. Although she was no longer using the soap, a faint fragrance lingered on her clothes. He detected it, but since it was so faint, decided that she was not the lavender girl he sought. She whispered the password, the door swung open and she entered.

Natalia was relieved to be in the common room, but only for a moment as Lucius spotted her and glared. He grabbed her arm roughly and whispered in her ear. "Broom closet, 10 minutes, don't be followed."

She nodded and he left her so as not to attract attention. Natalia walked over to Severus sitting alone at a study table, hoping to avoid confrontation.

The door had not yet shut and Igor witnessed the entire interaction. Regulus was just on his way out of the room and was pleased to see his new friend Karkaroff. He had gotten over his humiliating defeat prior to term and now had a new respect for Igor. He was eager to pick up some quidditch techniques from him.

"Igor my friend! Are we all set for the bonfire tonight? I've been asking every good looking girl I know, so the odds should be in our favor." The door shut behind him and he could see Natalia no more.

Igor scowled at him. "Tell me what you know about Natalia."

Regulus looked confused for a moment. "Who?"

"Natalia. I just walked her back to your common room."

"Natalia Smith?" Regulus winced. "Your standards are dropping. You know my brother Sirius and his friends once had a contest to see who could snog the ugliest bird."

"She's far from ugly." He was surprised to find such an opinion contrary to his own.

Regulus ignored him and went on with the story. "She wasn't involved. Sirius won. Not only was his bird ugly, she was rather robust if you know what I mean. His mates still won't let him live it down, but he doesn't care. The boy has no shame."

Igor sighed in annoyance while Regulus continued to ramble.

"I think she was muggle-born as well. Merlin, if our parents knew of his debauchery, they would pull him out of here so fast. He's darned close to getting kicked out anyway."

Frustration was now getting the better of Igor and he snapped. "Look, I don't want to hear about your brother and his idiotic friends."

Regulus looked surprised and he changed his tone. "Tell me what you know about Natalia. Does she have a boyfriend?"

"I've heard rumors about Lucius, but really they are just rumors. I've never seen them together. She spends most of her time with Snape."

"Snape?" Igor snorted. What kind of rival would that skinny bookworm be? What could a girl like Natalia see in him? "What's with them?"  
>"Who knows? That romance is even more far-fetched than rumors about Lucius. Who cares? She's nobody."<p>

"Why haven't you introduced us?"

"I told you, she's nobody."

Igor looked at him quizzically.

Regulus sounded patronizing as he attempted to explain to his foreign friend. "She's poor, no family, not sure of bloodline. You know, a nobody."  
>It made him sad to hear her referred to as a nobody. She seemed like a perfectly nice girl to him. "I disagree."<p>

"Look, you stick with Sasha. If you can land her, you'll be set for life."

"She's nice." Igor shrugged and jammed his fists into his pockets as they walked along. "I don't think she likes me in that way."

"Immaterial. None of us marry for love. Besides, once you're married you can ball whoever you want anyway."

Igor was mildly disgusted by his friend's declaration. "Is that what's going on with Natalia and Lucius?"

"Doubtful." He snorted. "He wouldn't condescend to touch someone like her."

"Does she like him?"

"No one likes him."  
>"Then why are you and your housemates always sucking up to him?"<p>

"Because he's Malfoy."

"He's a douche bag."

Regulus laughed, "Indeed! But a very powerful douche bag. Very rich one too."

"Do you think that's what Natalia sees in him? Money and power?"

"I don't know that she sees anything in him. I told you, it's just rumor and conjecture."

"What if it's not?

"Then it's not. Who cares? She's just a piece of ass and nothing more. That's all she'll ever be."

"I disagree." He was beginning to understand why she thought she needed protectors.

AN: HUGE THANK YOU TO WENDY WADDLES without whom this chapter would not be possible Oh and by the way, Wendy is writing this yummy little Die Hard, Hans Gurber fic—OMG—check it out—I love it!

So what would you do if you were Nat? Would you go to the bonfire and hope Lucius didn't find out? Or would you play it safe?


	9. Chapter 9 Light My Fire

CHAPTER NINE

Light My Fire

The bonfire started right after dinner though Natalia waited another hour before slipping out of the castle. She wanted to be sure she wasn't seen, not because what she was doing was wrong, but mainly so she could chicken out and go back to her room if she decided to. Besides, it was no one**'**s business. Her long dark winter coat was too formal for such a gathering, but it was all she owned. Paired with thick winter boots and her Slytherin scarf, it was**,** however**, **a classic look that would blend in. Natalia walked alone across the long bridge in the crisp evening air. The moonlight glistened on the black lake and she could see the warm glow of the bonfire in the distance, and hear the faint laughter lifted in the wind. Butterflies fluttered in her tummy and she took deep breaths in an attempt to quell them.

Lucius, Regulus, and a few other Slytherin boys went down to the bonfire right after dinner, anxious to find some cute birds to keep warm in the dark. Although there were loads of pretty girls there, most were curious, if not terribly serious, about the exotic young men of Durmstrang, and paid them no mind. Lucius decided that there were not enough of his disciples there, and left after an hour, sulking all the way to the bridge. As he reached the entrance to the bridge, he was surprised to run into Natalia. She gasped when she saw him, obviously surprised as well.

"Natalia." He hesitated, caught off guard by how lovely she looked in that moment. Her hair was slightly windblown, giving a softer quality to it rather than her normally severe bob. ** "**I'm surprised to find you out at this hour."

"It's not that late really." She stammered. "I like to walk the bridge at sunset." It was a weak lie that he did not fall for. Obviously, she was on her way to the bonfire. Although none of the Slytherin boys would be interested in a girl with such questionable lineage, the young men of Durmstrang would be. They would be leaving in a few months and any romantic entanglements would be easily forgotten.

"You do? It's an hour past sunset." He slithered closer to her.

"I know. It's just a nice night so I lingered."

"May I linger with you?" He focused very hard on keeping his voice soft and non-threatening.

"I was just about to head back."

"As was I. Perfect timing. We'll walk together." She looked down at her feet as they walked along, depressed at not being able to attend the bonfire. Meanwhile, Lucius stole glances at her. As she pushed a stray bit of hair behind her ear, he admired her graceful hand and delicate profile. He found himself wishing she were of a higher station, so they could be together unencumbered. "You're a pretty girl Natalia."  
>She glanced at him with surprise on her face before narrowing her eyes. She sighed heavily and continued walking. "You didn't meet me in the broom closet. I was disappointed."<p>

"I had to meet Slughorn in the lab to clean up. Apparently some first year Hufflepuff had a mishap." It was another lie, but at least this one was plausible.

"Oh, I thought you might be avoiding me."

"Why would you think that?"

"Because you always avoid me." He stepped in front of her.

"I'm doing you a favor. Your reputation would be tarnished if you were seen with me. What would Narcissa think?"

"I don't give a damn what she thinks." He spat the words out, changing his tone.

"I don't think so. I think it matters very much what she thinks." There was an awkward pause as she stepped around him and continued to walk. "The two of you seem to be hitting it off better since the Yule Ball."

He found it interesting that she noticed, and focused on keeping his voice smooth again. "I suppose. Our families took a brief holiday in the Swiss Alps together."

"Oh, how nice."

He was anxious to change the subject. "What did you do over break? Anything interesting?"

"I stayed at the orphanage and helped look after the little ones. Christmas can be difficult for them you know."

"Oh," he felt guilty about his lavish holiday, and struggled for a response. They walked the last half of the bridge. He didn't speak again until they were back inside the castle. They walked past the great hall and then to the spiral stone staircase that led back to Slytherin house. They were halfway down when Lucius pulled her aside to a secluded alcove with a window. "Let's not go back just yet." He held her hand as they sat in the window seat.

Her brown eyes met his blue ones with an utter absence of expression. But the rest of her face looked so terribly sad. "What's wrong Natalia? I hate to see such a pretty face look so sad."

She frowned a bit, and for a moment, he thought she would cry. "Tell me."

"Oh, it's nothing. I'm just a little tired that's all."

"To tired to stay here with me for a moment."

"No." There was a flatness in her voice that told him otherwise.

"Good. It's been weeks." He grabbed her hand and they began their ritual.

Igor sat on the dock**,** away from the merriment of the bonfire, shooting random sparks from his wand and wondering why Natalia stood him up. Everyone was sneaking fire whiskey tonight and Oblonsky**,** as usual, took the "boys will be boys" attitude and turned a blind eye. Most of the girls were either tipsy or pretending to be tipsy, and easy prey, particularly Sasha Malfoy. However**,** he could only think about the one who was denying him.

Levin noticed his normally gregarious friend once again sitting on the fringes and walked over to investigate. Igor didn't greet him, so he merely sat down beside him on the dock. "Oblonsky just went back to the ship."

Igor shrugged, and continued to shoot sparks for lack of something better to do.

"No surprise."

"Well…that means we are all unchaperoned. The party is bound to digress before long."

"Mmm." Igor barely acknowledged his friend.

"What's the matter with you? You keep looking up at the castle. Were you expecting more guests?"

"Just one. That girl Natalia." He sighed, still looking at the castle and not noticing that Levin was rolling his eyes.

"Who?"

"Natalia Smith, from Slytherin." Igor was slightly annoyed that Levin wouldn't know who this girl was. How could he not notice her? "You know the one that gave me the quidditch advice."

"Oh right," Levin nodded, "the homely one."

Levin's crack brought out his protective instincts, and he snapped at his friend.

"Natalia is not homely!"

"Uhm, okay." It was obvious from Levin's patronizing response that he did not share Igor's appreciation for Natalia, and this bothered Igor. His standing within the Durmstrang boys mattered very much to him and it was important that they approve of his choices. On top of that, Natalia was a sweet girl and didn't deserve that kind of crass remark. Levin was normally more generous than Igor in his assessments of others, therefore Igor assumed he was negatively affected by the fire whisky, and let it slide.

"She told me she'd come tonight, but it's almost ten. Lights out is in a few minutes."

"Wait," Levin chuckled and turned to face his friend, "are you telling me the Don Juan of Durmstrang has been stood up?"

"Shut it." Igor growled at him.

"Oh you have." Levin chuckled again while slapping Igor on the back. "Forget about it! Sasha's here. She's half drunk too, and have you noticed how the top button of her blouse keeps coming undone? Ooooh delicious." Levin snickered**,** but still Igor failed to see the humor.

"Yeah, I noticed." He had noticed indeed and would have pressed his advantage in a heartbeat if he hadn't been so preoccupied.

"I think she wants you to notice. I think she'd be crushed if you didn't notice."

"What's your point?" Igor furrowed his brow in annoyance.

"My point? She's hot and fawning all over you. And here you sit mooning over that stringy little girl from the pitch."

Igor shot him a dirty look.

Then Levin seemed to comprehend what was really going on. "Oh wait, this isn't your lavender girl is it?"

"No, I don't think so." Igor frowned and shook his head violently. He knew his lavender girl was a beauty. He just couldn't recall what she looked like. "She's just…nice. I like her eyes."

Levin shrugged. "Then go see her."

"I'm sure she's in the dorm by now."

"The password is Mercucio. Go see her."

"How do you know the password?"

"Paulette Parkinson told me. She wants me to sneak in later."

Igor walked up to the castle while he struggled to come up with what to say to her. He'd never been stood up in his short tenure of dating and wasn't sure what the proper approach would be. Should he express anger? Should he politely ask why? Maybe he should play it cool and ignore it altogether. His ability to improvise was usually solid and he figured he would know just what to say when he saw her. Surely it would come to him.

The wind was picking up and he was glad to reach the semi cover of the bridge. He was even more grateful to finally enter the castle and warm himself. He descended the spiral stairs thinking to himself, that Hogwarts carried a far more warm and welcoming atmosphere than the Spartan castle of Durmstrang. His musings were interrupted however by voices. He immediately recognized the melodious voice of Natalia, and smiled to himself. His joy however was short-lived as the next voice he heard was that of Lucius Malfoy. Not wanting to believe it, he slowly peered around the corner only to jerk his head back after catching them in an embrace. He could hear them breathing heavily, an occasional moan escaping Lucius. He shut his eyes tight to block it out**,** but for some reason, was unable to leave.

While she wouldn't have chosen it, cuddling up with Lucius in a secluded window seat overlooking the lightly snow covered grounds of Hogwarts wasn't all together unpleasant. He was beautiful in the moonlight. His hair and skin took on a luminous quality. Tonight however, his eyes were more thoughtful, he had more than sex on his mind. He grabbed her hand and forced her to stop. "I don't want you to see him." Came his throaty whisper.

"What?" She never liked to stop once they started. She just wanted to get it over with.

"Karkaroff, you were going to see him tonight weren't you. That's why you're here**,** isn't it**?**"

Unbeknownst to them, Igor's eyes grew wide at the mention of his name while he was hidden from view. He craned his neck and strained to hear what was said next**.**  
>"No. I told you I was just taking a walk." She dismissed his question not wanting to think about the answer herself and resumed stroking him. His grip turned vice like and she couldn't move again.<p>

"Say you won't see him." She looked at him like he was crazy, which only incensed him. "I said, say you won't see him."

For some reason, his jealousy struck a chord with her tonight. Isolation was wearing on her lately and she craved a connection with someone. Did she really have the power to hurt him if she chose another? Or was it merely his competitive nature? She so wanted to believe it. No one had ever been possessive of her like this. Something about his need for her touched her in that moment. Right or wrong, she was developing feelings for him. "Fine, I won't see him." She leaned over and kissed him tenderly to make sure he believed her. He growled like a tiger and kissed her back with violence.

Igor listened for only a few moments, feeling guilty about spying on such a private moment. He could hear Lucius groaning and the sound turned his stomach. Stealthily, he crept back up the stairs so as not to be heard. So his suspicions were now confirmed.

Now angry and frustrated, he jammed his hands in his pockets and sulked back to the bonfire. What could a nice girl like that possibly see in that weasel? He was so obviously using her. Why did she permit it? Probably because he was rich, and powerful and English, that was it. She must be one of those girls that only liked English boys. That must be it.

By the time he returned to the bonfire, his temper was completely foul. He circled around the edge of the party**,** trying to get back on the boat without having to speak to anyone. However**,** Sasha spotted him and called out his name. Several heads turned in his direction and he knew he could not ignore them without someone suspecting something was wrong. Reluctantly, he returned to the party.

"Igor, where have you been? I've been looking all.…" but Sasha didn't finish her sentence as she tripped over a log for the fire and fell towards him. He caught her before she hit the ground. He couldn't help wondering if this was just a ploy to wind up in his arms. She was kind of a lovable screw up and the sight of her stumbling drunkenly about lightened his mood.

"Whoa**,** Sasha, how much have you had to drink tonight?"

"Oh, I don't know." She waved her hand dismissively. "I wasn't keeping track. Who cares anyway?" She stood with his help**,** but was still unsteady on her feet.

"I care. Don't want you to hurt yourself."

She smiled and cocked her head to one side. "Where were you?"

"Oh, just taking a walk." He sighed while trying not to think about the disgusting hook up he'd just overheard. "I'm not in the mood for a big crowd tonight."  
>"Me neither. May I walk with you?"<p>

He didn't really want company, but couldn't think of a polite way to ditch her, so he relented. "Sure, shall we walk along the shoreline?"

"Sure." She smiled coyly at him and they walked along the path. "Look at all the stars. Aren't they beautiful?"

"Yes." He glanced up at them but his mind was far away.

"You use the stars to navigate the boat don't you?" She slipped her arm around his, and snuggled close.

"Yes. Celestial navigation, it's old**-**fashioned**,** but Headmaster Oblonsky swears by it. He says that as long as you master the art of it, if any other means fail you, or are not available to you, you can still find your way home."

"He sounds like a very smart man."

Igor snorted.

"You don't think he's smart."

"He's an arrogant bastard."

Sasha laughed. "What's got your wand in a knot tonight?"

"Nothing." He lied, glancing back up at the castle.

"Are you ready for the match against Gryffindor?"

He sighed, relieved to have a subject that would distract him. A quidditch obsession was something they shared.

"I'm not worried about it." He smirked at her.

"Oh, confident are we?" she teased.

"Always." He smiled. He liked Sasha. "We killed Slytherin. I don't see why your house should give us any trouble."

"Is that so?"

"It is. I think I took your brother to task." For weeks he'd actually felt guilty about humiliating Lucius on his home field, now he was ready to do it again but ten times worse.

"I'll say you did. I shouldn't say this because he his my brother and I do love him, but I was glad you did."

Igor snorted. "Why is that?"

"Oh he thinks the sun rises and sets for him and no one calls him on it. I like that you didn't go easy on him just because he's Lucius Malfoy."

Igor smiled, that was exactly what Natalia had said to him. If she really felt that way, why was she with him? Something wasn't adding up. Igor decided to snoop.

"He's fairly popular with the ladies isn't he?"

"I guess." She rolled her eyes and giggled. "Cash helps."

Igor snorted again, and kept fishing. "Are he and Narcissa exclusive?"

"Allegedly. I have my doubts though. He seems a little preoccupied lately."

"With who?"

"No idea." She leaned closer to him, enjoying a bit of gossip. "It's not Cissy though."

Igor extracted himself from her and walked closer to the shore. She watched him pick up a rock and skip it across the lake. "You know, you seem a little preoccupied yourself these days."

"Who me?"

"Yes you."

"Why do you say that?" He asked mechanically.

"Because you barely paid any attention to me at the Yule Ball. I was stuck being the third wheel with Levin most of the night. Then tonight, you don't lay a hand on me all night and then you disappear for a while. And I wore this outfit just because I thought you liked it." She sounded like a petulant child, and for some strange reason, he found it charming.

"Lay a hand on you? Do you want me to lay a hand on you?" She seemed to be flirting with him, but he saw her looking back at the party. She was obviously more interested in something going on back there. She answered his question with a shrug and he admired the way her hair bounced across her shoulders. She was a beautiful girl, and here he was**,** alone with her. What was wrong with him? He approached her and played with a strand of her hair for a few moments. She met his eyes but without passion. He bent his head and kissed her, softly at first**,** but then increasing as his hormones took off with their own agenda.

Natalia tucked herself into bed that night but could not get Lucius out of her mind. She knew it was crazy, but she was starting to feel an attachment to him. He needed her, perhaps he loved her, but their situation was impossible. Or was it? He was Lucius Malfoy. He could do whatever he pleased. If he really cared, perhaps there would be a way. She didn't love him, but she pitied him. Something about him made her want to care for him, to understand him and to offer him comfort. Narcissa certainly wasn't taking care of him in that manner. Her situation with Igor would certainly be impossible. Perhaps Lucius was her only salvation from being alone.

She was nearing slumber when Paulette Parkinson and Anastasia Greengrass staggered into the dorm. They were obviously inebriated, giggling and shushing each other as they knocked over a chair. Natalia faked sleep and hoped they would settle down soon. Finally, after much giggling and a Herculean effort to put on their pajamas, they settled into their beds. They then gossiped about various incidents at the bonfire, none of which were of interest to Natalia until Igor's name was mentioned.

"Did you SEE Igor Karkaroff making out with Sasha Malfoy?"

"No way! I thought she didn't like him. I felt bad for him at the Yule Ball. She totally ignored him all night."

"Well**,** she didn't ignore him tonight. You should have seen them. If McGonagall hadn't come down to break up the party, they might have gone all the way."

"No way!"

"Way!"

"She's such a slut."

"What do you expect? Gryffindor trash, that's her. Lucius would be mortified."

"Yeah, what happened to him tonight? He was there earlier and then I didn't see him."

"Who knows? Narcissa didn't want to come because it was too cold, so I'm sure he left to come back and see her. I don't know why though. What a bitch."

"No kidding. Ice cold, that one."

Natalia rolled over**,** onto her side and put a pillow over her head to muffle their voices. She couldn't stand to hear anymore. Igor and Sasha, of course they were together. Why wouldn't they be? She felt foolish and more ashamed of herself than ever. How could she ever think someone like Igor Karkaroff would ever be interested in her for anything other than friendship? How stupid of her. It was time to put away these ridiculous fantasies and live in the present

AN: Sorry I took forever to get this update out. I was dealing with some life issues that, while minor, zapped my desire to write for a few weeks. Then I was on vaca, and my lovely beta was on vaca and then we had an earthquake and a hurricane in the same week. All is well again and I will be faithfully cranking out updates at more regular intervals now.

I hope all my east coast buddies survived the weather week from hell—let's hope the worst is behind us.


	10. Chapter 10 Love Rules

CHAPTER TEN

Love Rules

For weeks after the bonfire**,** Igor was vexed by memories of that evening. Never before had he become so infuriated over a girl's behavior as he was after Natalia stood him up. He thought, no, he knew she liked him. That was evident in her eyes, yet something was holding her back. And Lucius, what was an intelligent, kind-hearted girl like that doing with a douche like Lucius Malfoy?

Apparently, his rival knew Natalia felt affection for him, for he forbid her to see him. Who did he think he was? More importantly, why had she agreed to it? How could she submit to such a pathetic demand? Perhaps she cared somewhat for Lucius. However, Igor was certain she was not in love with him. For if she was, she would never have attempted to see him at the bonfire, much less without Lucius' approval. Yes, she must feel something for him. Or perhaps his original theory was correct, and she valued Lucius for his wealth, power and what he could do for her. These thoughts turned over and over in his mind and he went back and forth between thinking she didn't care for him, to being utterly convinced that she did.

This internal debate was not Igor's only issue. After overhearing the exchange between Natalia and Lucius, he had been out of sorts and found solace in the open arms of Sasha Malfoy. She was entrancing, available, and willing, and although he had not planned on it, he had succumbed to her allure. He had allowed himself to be drawn in by her flirtation, and for the evening, become lost in the feeling of her warm lips and body pressed against his. Their interlude lasted at least an hour, gradually she granted him more and more liberty, and unsure though he was, he crossed each line that she permitted him too. Further and further she allowed him to go, first kisses, then caresses, then her hands slid under his shirt, and his lips trailed tentatively down her neck until their private party, along with the entire bonfire was brought to an abrupt halt by McGonagall. It was a welcome relief, for no matter his lack of feelings for her, he was unable to resist these pleasures of the flesh. His mind knew he should have stopped, but his body was in control, and so he did not.

Now it was downright embarrassing to run into Sasha. It was awkward between them and he regretted leading her on. Oddly, she too, was preoccupied. He assumed she was merely embarrassed at her unladylike behavior, though her conduct didn't bother him one bit. He didn't think any less of her. In himself however, he was disappointed. He used her to forget another, and that was dishonest. Perhaps Natalia thought him disingenuous and that is why she forgot so quickly. Perhaps, given his behavior, she was right.

He searched for Natalia in the courtyard, in the hall during meals, he even stopped by the infirmary where she sometimes worked to try and speak with her, but to no avail. She was avoiding him. He was certain of it. Did she know about Sasha? He wondered what was on her mind. He obsessed for several days before deciding he was reading too much into it all. She was with Lucius. He meant nothing to her. And really, what did he even know about her? He laughed thinking how silly he was being over such a wisp of a girl. In time**,** Igor forgot about it all, until he saw her again.

It was on the pitch during the Gryffindor vs. Hufflepuff quidditch match. There she was attending to injuries on the Hufflepuff side. She worked intently, in the background attending to stowed fingers and twisted ankles while the players flew about, getting all the glory. While the match raged on, he also watched Sasha and compared the two. Sasha liked to show off on a broom, doing spinouts and risky maneuvers even when they were not necessary. She loved attention, seemed to need it. Natalia was the exact opposite. She was content to exist in the shadows, unnoticed by anyone. Except of course Igor, who couldn't stop noticing her.

When the match, or rather, the rout was over, the Hufflepuffs trudged off the field in despair. Sasha, Sirius and James Potter stood on the sidelines congratulating each other on their outstanding play. She was enjoying herself and looked wonderful with windblown hair and flushed cheeks. Attractive as Sasha was, her beauty could not distract him from the more modest witch following the Hufflepuff team off the pitch at a rather quick pace. Realizing that he may not see her again for a while, Igor seized the moment, charging down the stairs of the spectator box and running across the pitch to catch up with her.

"Natalia!" He called after her. If she heard him, she pretended not to, and continued on. Fortunately for Igor, his long legs made him quicker and he easily managed to catch up with her. When he touched her arm, she finally turned to face him and he was disarmed. "Hallo Natalia."

"Oh, Hi Igor." There was a lack of enthusiasm in her greeting that caused his heart to sink a bit.

"I missed you at the bonfire." He didn't bother to hide his feelings like other young men of his age. Generally, girls seemed to appreciate his transparency and responded to him.

"Bonfire? Oh yeah. I told you I had to study. Sorry." One shoulder shrugged and she offered no further excuse. How could it be that she was so unconcerned about his feelings? She didn't even bother to make up a plausible lie, just this lame excuse. Little did she knowthat he knew who she was really with, and he was not about to let her get away with treating him like something she stepped in.

Igor leaned in closer and narrowed his eyes while looking directly into hers. "What's going on with you and Malfoy?" Obviously, she hadn't seen that coming, for she flinched. Not for long however**,** for then her eyes also narrowed, and she came right back at him.

"I could ask you the same thing."

Now it was his turn to flinch. So she knew about Sasha. "That's different." He shook his head and discretely avoided eye contact.

"Not at all. And don't say it is, you sound like a chauvinist."

Her words stopped him dead in his tracks. She had him. He was using Sasha for her name and position as much as she was rumored to be using Lucius. If he was being truthful, there was something flattering about a pureblood heiress draping herself all over him. Even if he didn't feel strongly about Sasha, it made his friends envious and fed his ego. But this wasn't about him. It was about her. "Is he your boyfriend?"

"No." She snorted.

"Then what's your association with him?"

"That's none of your business. You ask a lot of questions."

He raised his chin, but kept his eyes locked on hers. "I'm curious."

"There is no association. We are housemates, no more."

He was prepared for her to lie, and dismissed it. If she decided to lie, there was nothing he could do, so he tried another angle. "Why did you stand me up?" His questions were coming rapidly and designed to throw her off. Just like a quidditch match, if you kept the pressure on, and took multiple shots, eventually you would score.

"It wasn't a date**,** so I really didn't stand you up."

No matter what, she seemed to be able to put him in his place. As maddening as it was, he enjoyed it. "I guess I can't force you to tell me. I was disappointed though."

"Not for long. I hear you and Sasha hit it off quite well."

He stifled a grin**,** generated by the thought that perhaps she was a bit jealous. "I suppose we did."

"Do you like her?" She asked softly, with a forlorn tone to her voice. Now she was the one pressing him for information, but her technique was far gentler.

"Hm? Oh yes. Nice girl."

"She is." She turned away from him so he couldn't see her chin wobble. "She really is. You deserve someone nice."

She had taken two steps before he touched her sleeve, prompting her to turn back to him. "As do you."

A shadow crossed her face while she seemed to make a great effort to smile. "I'm late for work**,** Igor." She turned and walked away, while he stared after her, wondering what had just happened.

The rest of the year was rather uneventful for both of them. Natalia immersed herself in work and her studies, grateful for something constructive to think about. Lucius managed to arrange an encounter with her ever two or three weeks. Since the bonfire, his demeanor had softened, and he was now less demanding. Even he was smart enough to figure out that he could catch more flies with honey rather than vinegar. Natalia's judgment was clouded, and her attachment to him was growing. Lucius could have embarrassed her, he could have forced himself more fully upon her, but he didn't and for that, she was grateful. So isolated was she, and unable to talk to anyone about her dilemma, that she thought these were normal feelings. So under his influence was Natalia, that she viewed his lack of abuse as an act of tenderness. Although to a trained professional, it was a touch of Stockholm syndrome, as in the muggle world.

Igor continued his relationship with Sasha mainly because it seemed to be expected of him by his mates, but also**,** he liked her as a friend. Despite her feminine beauty, she was frank and direct like a man. Kissing and heavy petting were also a part of their relationship and he didn't have to be madly in love with her to enjoy that. She always stopped him before things went to far. And**,** at times**, **she seemed terribly distant, like she had something or someone else on her mind.

The day before the Durmstrang students were to leave Hogwarts, there was to be one final quidditch match. This time Durmstrang would be facing Gryffindor and Igor would be going head to head against Sasha. When they were together, she deferred to him, letting him call the shots. This inflated his childish masculine pride and he was quite confident that she would be no match for him on the pitch that day.

As the teams were warming up, he spied Natalia heading over to his side of the pitch. She would be assisting Durmstrang today and this pleased him. He would get to see her one last time before leaving for home. He didn't approach her right away, but watched her walking toward the team. Her shoulder length hair was lifted by the breeze, which allowed him to examine her face more closely. She possessed high cheekbones and sharp features softened by the graceful curve of her brow. It was a serious face, and strangely, he could see himself in it. It didn't matter what his friends thought. He found her entrancing. When he worked up his nerve, he approached, wearing what he considered to be a charming smile.

"Any advice for me today**, **oh Queen of Quidditch strategy?" He asked trying to deepen and smooth out his voice for effect.

A mischievous smile curved across her lips as she met his eyes. "Sure." She then turned back to her bag and busied herself**,** organizing first aid supplies so as not to draw attention to their conversation. "Sirius Black, you know Regs' brother, is a notorious show off. If you let him have some minor success in the beginning, he'll puff up like a peacock and then you can annihilate him when his guard is down"

A warm feeling bloomed inside him. She was still on his side. "Not as good as some of your other advice. Bit risky, but I'll take it to heart."

"All right then how about this? Do you see the red head in the front row of the Gryffindor box?" She looked over at an unsuspecting Lily Evans.

He moved his head closer to hers and looked in the same direction, while being very aware of how close they were. "Yes, not my type but some find her attractive."

"No matter. Flirt with her anyway."

He grimaced. "Ewe. Why?" She loved that he made a face. It gave her a smug little feeling**,** knowing that he didn't find Lily attractive.

"Because she's James Potter's girlfriend that's why. He's the seeker and he's a jealous hot head. Whatever you do**,** make it big, and you might throw him off. Be warned though. Sirius is his best friend. Those two are so far up each others asses it borders dangerously close to homosexuality. Offend either one and they'll both come at you."

"They're both all mouth and no trousers."

Natalia giggled. "Glad you're confident but be careful."

"Don't worry. I have friends on my side as well."

"One more thing, Sasha's a distraction for you."

His expression changed to shock at being called out on his romantic inclinations.

"She probably thinks you'll go easy on her and you probably will. It's your weakness and if you don't overcome it, you're going to lose."

He chuckled. "You know**, **you think like a man."

"What does that mean?"

"It's a compliment. I love that you say what you think and what you mean. Most women don't."

She blushed. "Whatever. Don't be a schmuck. She's been flirting with you more than usual this week hasn't she? I'll bet she allowed you a few more liberties than usual too. Let you go a little further than you thought you'd get?"

The smile faded from his face as he took stock in what she said. She had let him feel her breasts at the bonfire and only yesterday**,** led him to believe that he could press his luck further after the match today. He was being used. "Come to think of it, she has."

"Right. She's softening you up. She probably wants you to think she'll like you better if you let her win."

"No." He waved his hand at her while shaking his head. He was the user, never the used. How was it possible that he would fall for Sasha's obvious tactics?

"Yes." She raised her eyebrows and held his gaze.

He smirked. "Perhaps you're right. You seem to have put lots of thought into my strategy today."

"I've got money on this match."

He laughed. "Really? How much?"

"Twenty galleons. Don't fuck up."

Hearing a girl swear like she was in a men's locker room was amusing to him, the face of an angel and the mouth of a sailor. He winked at her before heading out onto the pitch. "I won't."

The Durmstrang team took the field and warmed up, flying in an impressive lightening fast formation. The Gryffindor team studied them carefully, occasionally putting their heads together and whispering to one another. After seeing the humiliating defeat of Slytherin prior to break, they were taking this team very seriously.

Igor and his teammates practiced, batting about a practice quaffle and doing flips, spinouts and other flamboyant maneuvers on their brooms designed to intimidate the opposition. When their time was up and it was Gryffindor's turn to warm up, they rocketed two laps around the field as an answer to the Durmstrang display. While the rest of the team returned to their side of the field, Igor swooped in to pick up the quaffle and flew slowly enough to attract attention, to the opposing side. When he reached the Gryffindor side, he made a very big deal of transfiguring the practice quaffle into a lovely bouquet of pink roses, waving his wand with flourish. He then hovered directly in front of Lily Evans and presented them to her while turning his most charming smile on her.

Lily looked at him strangely but was smiling at him. No one could resist smiling back at Igor when he flashed his thousand-watt smile in his or her direction. Natalia's eyes immediately went to the Gryffindor team who had stopped in mid drill and were now hovering over the pitch. Sasha was openly gaping at them, which Natalia found amusing. James eyes were wild with anger and he leaned forward on his broom to take off in Lily's direction. However Sirius, who was close by, swooped in front of him and stopped James before he got very far.

"He's fucking with you Prongs. Let it go."

James did not respond other than to stop. His eyes burned with rage and he did not take his eyes off Igor and Lily.

Sasha seemed to shake herself back to reality and flew over to join the discussion. "He's right James. It means nothing. Don't be drawn in. It's what he wants."

James, still scowling, nodded and turned away to continue the drill. Igor and Lily conversed for a few moments while Natalia observed from a distance. It was her idea, and though she knew it meant nothing, she felt a pang of jealousy. Lily tossed her head back and laughed loudly, Igor smiled again and flew back to join his team.

His teammates slapped him on the back and guffawed at his antics. Igor merely smiled at them and returned to Natalia's side.

He stood casually beside her and watched the Gryffindor team practice. Without looking at her he asked, low enough so no one would hear, "How was that?"

Natalia also looked straight ahead while answering. "Bra-vo Mr. Karkaroff. You're in their heads now. That will help, but you'll still have to play hard."

"Not a problem, I always play hard." He winked at her again.

The match was predictably a disaster for the Gryffindor team, who always tended to wear their hearts on their sleeves and let their tempers and emotions get the best of them. Igor, much to the delight of Natalia, showed no mercy to Sasha.

She was the star Chaser for her team, but was having great difficulty getting anything past Levin, who was the Keeper for Durmstrang. Not only did she have a terrible time trying to score on Levin, Igor kept interfering and throwing her shots off. The longer her team went scoreless, the more frazzled she became and her play got worse and worse.

Igor cut a striking form as he streaked across the sky with his red Durmstrang scarf whipping behind him. He was the only one who wore a scarf and Natalia suspected it was for no other reason than that it looked cool. He was having a tremendous day as beater and every time he knocked a bludger out of the way of their seeker, it seemed to strike either Sasha or Sirius. Finally, Igor landed a shot on Sirius that knocked him off his broom. The crowd gasped as he hung on with one hand dangling perilously high above the pitch. James, the seeker**,** flew immediately to his rescue. He helped his friend to the safety of his broomstick, however this pulled his attention away from seeking the golden snitch. As Sirius thanked him for his help, a deafening cheer exploded from the Durmstrang box. They turned in time to see the Durmstrang seeker holding the golden snitch high above his head in victory.

Igor and his teammates converged on their seeker as they all celebrated their victory. In the middle of it all**,** he turned his broom to face Natalia and smiled broadly. She nodded and smiled slightly, trying to keep her congratulations private. He understood and held up his index finger while mouthing the word "watch." Watch she did as he added insult to injury. He flew once again over to the overrated Lily Evans, removed his trademark Durmstrang scarf and placed it flirtatiously around her neck as she blushed.

With cliché like predictability, James flew into a rage. This time Sirius wasn't quick enough and James sped towards Karkaroff, his face contorted in anger. Igor turned in time to see his attacker coming for him but merely squared his shoulders, ready for the fight. Natalia turned her face to the ground so no one could see her laughing but kept her eyes fixed on Igor. He was in for it now**,** but the cocky half smile on his face said that he was ready for anything.

James jumped off his broom mid-flight as he reached Igor, pouncing on him and knocking him to the ground. Dust kicked up around them as they wrestled and punched each other with a fury. It was what would be referred to in other sports a bench clearing brawl, even worse than the one with Slytherin. Igor's teammates were once again, eager to jump into the fray, and it seemed that every boy in Gryffindor house took the opportunity to pile on. While most of the Slytherin box looked on in amusement, Lucius included, Severus glared at the display and looked like he might jump in himself at any moment.

As before, the Headmasters, Oblonsky and Dumbledore immobilized the students before sending them back to their quarters one by one. However**,** while Dumbledore and his staff gave each one a stern talking to, Oblonsky merely slapped them on the back and sent them off.

At dinner that night, the last one before the end of term, everyone was buzzing about the day's events. Karkaroff's stock seemed to have been elevated in the eyes of the Slytherin boys who loved to show up their archenemy, Gryffindor house. Severus seethed in silence; obviously perturbed that Lily had been inadvertently involved and disgusted by Potter's public display of affection. Natalia thought of telling him that it was all merely a strategic ploy, but then decided she liked the idea of a secret between she and Igor, and so kept quiet.

She smiled to herself that night as she walked back from the Great Hall, back to Slytherin House to pack. Igor was waiting by the entrance to her house and she started when she saw him.

"My goodness, you scared me."

He merely chuckled and pulled her into a nearby stairwell. **"**Your advice seems to have made me public enemy number one." He kept her hand in his and she worried her palms would begin to perspire.

"You're a big boy, you can take it." She smiled coyly. "You won."

"We won. Thanks to you." Now his thousand-watt smile was turned on her, and she understood why Lily blushed. "A bunch of us are going into Hogsmeade to celebrate. Join us?"

"Afraid not. I have to work in the infirmary to take the final inventory, then I have to pack."

"Pack later. Party now."

"I can't."

He gave an exasperated sigh. "Why do you always turn me down? I thought you liked me."

"I do. But I don't have extra time in my schedule. I have to work. I have to study. No one is going to hand me anything, I have to work very hard just to get by here."

His eyes softened, as did his rich voice. "It's important to have friends and fun too you know. You should make time to enjoy life Natalia."

"I'll make time one day. Now isn't the time**,** however."

"Well**,** when you finally decide to make time, make it with me."

A curious look crossed her face and he realized that didn't come out right.

"Oh…I mean." He was sure he'd offended her**,** but she laughed and smiled. Her smile seemed to put him at ease again. He laughed along with her.

"Here." He reached into his pocked and placed the golden snitch from the day**'**s match in her hand. "We wouldn't have won without you today."

"Oh Igor, really, you should keep this." She stammered, no one had ever given her anything, much less a sentimental gift such as this.

"I want you to have it." He closed her fingers around it. "Something to remember Durmstrang by."

"Something to remember you by." It was out before she could think and her cheeks burned with embarrassment.

"Will you?" He stooped down to draw her eye. "Remember me?"

She took a deep breath and found her courage. "I think you are quite unforgettable Igor Karkaroff."

His gaze took on a dream like quality. Raising her hand that held the snitch**,** he pressed his lips against the back of her hand for several moments. "Until we meet again Miss Smith." And then he turned and walked out of her life.

_AN: Hope you liked it__ Don't worry, we haven't seen the last of Iggy. _


	11. Chapter 11 Thank You

CHAPTER ELEVEN

Thank You

Natalia spent a dismal but uneventful summer back at the orphanage. Since she was fifteen now, she helped with the youngest ones. The little ones seemed to bring out her maternal instincts. They looked up to her with their wide, uncertain little eyes. She was extremely protective of them, and tried to show them each as much love and affection as she could. She knew how precious kindness and love were at such a tender age. Unexpectedly, the more she gave of herself to these young ones, the more loveand affection they showered upon her in return. She was learning some valuable lessons about life and love and she now felt better about herself than she ever had before.

Upon return to school for the start of her fifth year, she resumed her familiar routine and took some comfort in it. The food at Hogwarts was better than the meager rations at the orphanage, the quarters more comfortable and she had her studies to challenge her mind. It was a positive change.

Even her relationship with Lucius was a little healthier this year. For one thing, he asked to see her, rather than demanded. He was also far gentler. Rather than pulling her aside, and insisting that she tend to his needs, he held her hand, spoke softly, and kissed her tenderly. Sometimes, he did not require her services at all, but merely wanted someone to talk to or sit with. Had he not been the same arrogant prick to everyone else, she would swear he was a different person**,**polyjuiced to look like Lucius Malfoy.

It seemed the tone was set right from the start that year when he sneaked her into his Prefect's room just after dinner one night during the first week of school. His room was removed from the others with a separate entrance. She could enter without being seen. The room was not large, merely a standard dorm, with a closet, room enough for a desk, a dresser and a bed. However being the Slytherin Prefect's room, the furnishings were the very best of everything. The expensive pieces were all ornately carved dark wood with the four-poster bed being the focal point of the room. Natalia gulped when she saw it, hands sweating while she wondered how far he would push her this year.

"I've missed you Natalia." He whispered into her ear pulling her against his chest smoothly and wrapping her in his arms. "Please say you missed me too." Normally he was forceful, and Natalia's surprise was evident in her voice.

"Of course I did." Natalia responded, dreading what she thought was coming.  
>He pulled away and gazed at her with a dreamy grin on his face. "Come sit down. I have something for you." Holding the tips of her fingers in his, he guided her to the bed. She bit her lip to keep it from quivering, all the while knowing precisely what he wanted to show her. She'd seen it before. Him having a private room this year was not a good thing.<p>

Turning away from her, he walked over to his desk, opened the drawer and removed something. When he turned to face her, his expression puzzled her. If she didn't know him better, she would swear he was nervous about something. When he returned to her, he sat down on the edge of the bed and placed a small black velvet box in her hand.  
>Natalia was momentarily bewildered. "What's this?"<p>

"A present." His smile was genuine and his brilliant blue eyes could only be described as hopeful.

"For whom?" Natalia was understandably suspicious.

"For you of course, silly girl. Go on. Open it."

Natalia was not accustomed to receiving gifts. Other than the impersonal donated Christmas gifts for children of the orphanage, she'd never received a present, and was unsure of the protocol when it came to accepting such things. She looked at the box in her hand and back to him**,** thinking this had to be some kind of mistake or twisted joke.

"It's not my birthday, Lucius." She muttered**.**

"I know that." He put his hand on the back of her head and smoothed her hair while carefully watching her.

"Why did you get me this?"

Lucius moved his hand over her ear and held her cheek in his smooth palm, soft from lack of hard work. "Because I missed you. Open it."

Natalia ran her fingers over the expensive velvet box. The box alone was lovely. What could it possibly contain? Carefully she opened the box and examined the contents.

On a long but simple silver chain was a jade pendant. The jade was a lovely shade of green, which reminded her of the lake on a sunny afternoon. Around and over the front of the stone were two dragons, seemingly in mid-flight. Their talons touched each other, and she imagined they could have been holding on to each other in some kind of aerial dance. She gasped when she opened it, putting her hand over her mouth.

"Oh Lucius,"

"Do you like it?" He asked hopefully.

For a moment, she was unable to speak and merely nodded before finally being able to say. "I do."

"I'm glad. I know you don't really like jewelry, but when I saw it, I was immediately reminded of you."

"Why would you think I don't like jewelry?"

He paused before he answered. "Am I wrong? You never wear any**,** so naturally I just assumed…."

Natalia cut him off. "I don't own any."

"Oh." He felt foolish, always forgetting the difference in their backgrounds. He quickly changed the topic. "May I put it on you?"

"Yes." She turned away as he removed the necklace from its box and draped it around her neck. She then turned around toward him but looked down admiring the necklace. "Lucius, it's exquisite."

Her naiveté caused him to smile. It wasn't exquisite by a long shot. He got it in a mid-priced trinket store at a good price while on summer holiday. But she didn't know any better, and she liked it, so this pleased him. Although it did immediately remind him of her, and he was thrilled that she liked it, he now wished he'd gotten her something more expensive. He'd blown twenty times the amount on a pearl bracelet for Narcissa, merely because she expected it. When he presented it to her, she merely shrugged and said "Thanks," tossing the box aside and never even putting it on. Now here was Natalia, so appreciative of even the smallest gesture. It reminded him why he was so drawn to her.

"It looks lovely on you. Compliments your hair." He pushed a thin wisp of hair behind her ear. "It's so good to see you again."

"It's good to see you too**,** Lucius." Natalia was so overcome with emotion due to his gift and his kind manner; she couldn't resist leaning forward and kissing him, ever so softly. It was the first time she'd ever kissed him first**,** without the intent of manipulating him. She kissed him because she was moved to. Her lips pressed gently against his for just a few seconds. His breathing became audible and shallow, and he wore a dazed expression when she pulled away and looked at him. He was obviously becoming aroused and she knew in an instant he would pull her hand to his cock, but he didn't. He merely held eye contact with her. Stark blue eyes and strong masculine facial features made it impossible for to turn away. He gulped hard and licked his lips nervously. Watching his tongue glide slowly across his lips stirred something inside her and she wanted to kiss him again. So she did. Again**,**she leaned over and pressed her lips against his, but this time she lingered.

She moved her lips slowly over his**,** but still**,** she wanted more. She parted his lips with her own and slid her tongue past his lips while he breathed harder into her mouth. Still**,**he kept his hands to himself and let her do whatever she wanted. It was maddening to her, she was used to him responding so quickly and taking the lead. The fact that he wasn't was positively infuriating and made her want him all the more. She would get him to respond. She had the power.

"Lucius," she whispered. His name rolled off her tongue as she pushed him back on the bed and crawled on top of him. His cock was as hard as a rock under her and she indulged in a guilty pleasure of grinding her hips against it.

"Oh Merlin, Natalia, you feel so good." He groaned.

"Tell me what you want Lucius."

"You know what I want. Only you know me." He reached down and quickly undid his trousers with one hand. Then he led her hand down to touch his now throbbing shaft.

"Is this what you want?" As if she had to ask.

"Yeah," he groaned thrusting his hips upward as she provided his favorite sexual friction. "Ahhhh, go slow."

"Anything you want." She didn't really mean anything, but she was quite caught up in the moment and it seemed like the thing to say at the time. She smashed her lips against his again and wiggled her body over him while slowly pumping the life out of him. Keeping the pressure on, she began prolonging the agony and ecstasy of the moment until he was nearly delirious, whipping his head from side to side and begging for release.

"Please, please."

She thought for a moment, crafting her dirty expression before naughtily whispering, "All during the long**,** hot summer**,** I've dreamed of getting my fingers around your dragon." She buried her face in his shoulder so he couldn't see her laughing at how predictable he was. Were all men like this? No wonder girls played hard to get, for it all seemed so silly. Still, it was something she knew about him that no one else did, and she liked having a secret with him.

"Ahhhhh." He moaned loudly as an unusually large amount of his seed washed over both of them. Someone seemed to have had a very long and fruitless summer. She rested her head on his chest and listened to his heartbeat. It was over quickly, but somehow, this time, she felt she was left wanting. This was a new feeling for her. Generally she was just happy it was over, but today was different. This was probably a very unladylike and perhaps an abnormal way to feel, so she tried to stifle it. In time**,**it subsided, but she now found herself without that feeling of dread for the next time. She wouldn't seek it, but she would no longer run away from him.

Lucius caressed her back in silence as she lay in his arms. "Will you stay with me tonight?"

"No. You know that's not possible. All the girls in my dorm would talk."

"Oh yes," He rolled his eyes but good-naturedly so, "the hen house."

"What time is it?"

"Ten."

"Ten? Oh no, I've got to get back and I'm sure you have rounds right?" She rolled off him, took her wand and carefully cleaned them up.

While she straightened her hair in the mirror, he went over to his dresser and took out a small money pouch.

"Here." He said flatly, handing it to her.

Although they had done this more times than she cared to remember, tonight, the money was insulting to her. She scowled at the bag.

"What?" He raised one eyebrow. "Not enough? Well**,** I suppose tonight did require some extra effort. For a moment, I'd almost believe you cared for me. All right then," he sighed, "I think I have another hundred in here." He rustled though his drawer.

"I don't want your money…tonight."

_AN: Well who wouldn't be drawn in by the softer side of Lucius? I'd like to think I'd be smarter than that but probably not__ And without the dashing Mr. Karkaroff to captivate her, she is now adrift. He'll be back though. _

_Thanks to all who have the story on alert and/or have left reviews. Please be kind and leave your thoughts—they keep me motivated to write. _


	12. Chapter 12 Love Potion Number 9

Chapter 12

Love Potion Number 9

It was the last year Lucius would spend at Hogwarts. He was always competitive and driven to be the best, but now that this time in his life was drawing to a close, he was completely obsessed with being top of his class. Rudolphus Lestrange was edging him out in potions and this was extremely troublesome to him. Dread filled the pit of his stomach at the thought of telling his father that he was ranked anything other than first in class and would not be giving the commencement address. It would be entirely unacceptable to both parties.

Natalia, sweet Natalia was the only one he could dare confess this fear to. She would understand. Not matter what childish neurosis he revealed, she did not laugh or belittle him. Thoughtfully, she should consider what he said, and respond in a manner crafted to help him. Sanctuary from the pressures of his life was what she afforded him. More and more he found himself looking for excuses to be near her.

To describe him as preoccupied as the entered the library one blustery evening in November would be an understatement. Normally he huddled up with Lestrange and Crabbe by their usual table next to the window to study. Tonight however he turned his back on them, and walked to the table in the center of the room where Natalia and Severus were sitting. His usual study buddies watched with mild curiosity as he cleared his throat and asked, "May I join you?"

Severus did not look up, but Natalia responded by saying, "Of course. Please do." She smiled demurely at him while pushing her books to the side so he could put his own the table. Lucius took a seat but only glanced briefly at her, not wanting to blow their cover, though he felt his heartbeat quicken just being near her.

Lucius sat down next to Natalia, drumming his fingers nervously. "Severus, you're still assisting Slughorn are you not?"

"I am." Severus replied but did not look away from his book. This lack of respect for an upperclassman, particularly in front of Natalia, annoyed Lucius. It was for precisely this kind of flagrantly surly behavior that he was socially ostracized.

"How are Lestrange's marks?" Lucius tried to sound nonchalant but he was anxious about his competition.

"Excellent of course. Perfect marks I'm told. Looks like he may be at the top of your class."

Lucius already knew this, rarely asking a question to which he did not know the answer. "Still your abilities far surpass his." He knew all too well the value of some strategically placed flattery. Severus smiled despite his best effort not to.

"Your point being?" One dark eyebrow shot up as if to punctuate the question.

"I could use your keen insight while I prepare for my exams."  
>Severus shut his book. "I have no time Lucius. Have you forgotten my obligation to Sasha? Your father pays mean exorbitant amount of galleons to tutor her. I can hardly neglect a profitable assignment to help you too."<p>

"Ah yes, I'm sure my sister would be full time occupation." Lucius pretended that he had forgotten, but really he had not. "She possesses none of the Malfoy talent."

"Natalia is in the lab three night a week setting up for lessons. She can help you." Severus waved his hand dismissively, his manner further annoying Lucius even though it was exactly what he wanted Severus to say.

"Hmm." Lucius' plan was unfolding as he'd hoped. His goal was to have Natalia help him all along; he was merely waiting for someone else to suggest it so it wouldn't look so obvious.

"Excellent idea. Would you have time, Natalia?"

"I suppose." She responded as a wry smile extended over her rosebud lips.

Lucius was glad to have a more respectable reason to spend time with her, one he didn't have to lie about. He felt guilty for using her for pleasures of the flesh, though not guilty enough to stop using her. Her touch was too thrilling, and when he thought about how forbidden their romance was, it was too titillating to resist. Strangely, he did consider it a romance, and was able to reason away how it had actually started.

When he entered the lab on the first night, Natalia was already there setting up for the following day's assignments. He watched her for a moment. She was very efficient and organized, laying out each student's supplies in precise order. He so admired her work ethic and how thorough she was when she set her mind to something. She could take care of him. He didn't think she knew he was there until she addressed him without looking up.

"Your marks are excellent Lucius. I can only assume this is a ruse you've concocted to act out some fantasy about me getting you off in the lab."

Lucius felt his cock twitch and his groin tighten at the very suggestion, but filed that away for another time.

"If you want to know the truth, it's just as I said before. I'll need better than excellent marks to surpass Lestrange." He exhaled with relief at confessing this to someone. It had been bothering him for weeks and now he could finally get it off his chest.

As he thought, she did not judge him. Silky dark hair bounced against her shoulder when she tilted her head thoughtfully. "Why are you worried about him?"

Lucius sat down at the table in the back of the room. "I'm not. I'm worried about myself. I want to be at the top of my class."

"Always striving for perfection aren't you? Well that's admirable."

He beamed under her compliment.

"Then let's get to work. What potion would you like to start with?"

"How about a love potion?"

"Love potion?" She giggled while he admired the pinkish hue blossoming on her cheeks. "Planning on using that on anyone?"

"Tempting however, no. It's just one I've had difficulty with."

"All right then, get to work and I'll observe. Let's see where you're struggling."

This was another way to test the waters, to see how they worked together, to test their compatibility. For with Lucius, everything was a test. Natalia kept working, but passed by his table frequently to observe his technique, which made him nervous. He was very precise and careful. His measurements were perfectly accurate and he followed all preparation instructions to the letter, however, it still wasn't coming together as it should, and he began to become exasperated.

"I don't understand what's wrong." He huffed while slapping his hand on the table.

"Simmer down, it's just practice. Let me see." Her hand grazed his as she took the spoon from him and stirred the too thick concotion. "You know you sometimes with potions, you have to tune out logic and go on what feels right."  
>He looked at her with a blank expression, not quite understanding.<p>

"It's just not an exact science no matter what the books tell you. For example, you're rushing this love potion. Think of the potion as something living and breathing. Think of how it might want you to approach it. During the creation process, you must consider the desired effect of your brew and tailor your technique accordingly. For example, with a love potion, you have to be very patient. Keep the heat down and wait for it to boil, even if you think it's taking too long. The ingredients are rather fragile and unstable, if you move too fast, you'll surely scorch it, hence ruining it. You have to take your time and wait for it to happen. Trust me. You'll be glad you did. Then the consistency is much smoother and the other ingredients will blend easily."

He reflected on her response while memorizing the exact shade of her eyes in the dim light. "Sounds like a metaphor."

"It's not intended to be, I'm just telling you the way it is."

"So I shouldn't rush things?" He stepped closer to her.

"Correct." She smiled, knowing what was coming and breathing harder in anticipation of his touch.

"Take it slow and wait for things to unfold?" His arm encircled her waist and he pulled her gently against him.

"Now you understand." She whispered.

"Perfectly." He brushed his fingers against her cheek. "A slow burn is what you are suggesting."

Natalia merely smiled as his lips gently descended upon hers. He took her advice and did not rush his kiss, allowing the heat between them to build slowly. When she pulled him closer and snaked her fingers through his hair, he nearly melted against her.

As their evening potion sessions went along through the year, Natalia found herself thinking more and more about Lucius, and looking forward to seeing him. Sometimes, he still needed her for a release, but most nights, they studied, brewed potions, talked and kissed for hours. She adored kissing him and no longer worried where it would lead. She trusted him now, confident that he would not hurt her. Money still changed hands but he was careful not to make it seem like payment for services rendered. If she happened to mention that she needed something, he got it for her. Periodically, he did give her money but made it seem more like an allowance. She snickered thinking this must be what girls meant when they referred to someone as a sugar daddy. Although she knew it was not only improper, but also morally wrong, she needed the money, and so accepted his help.

When classes ended for Christmas break, she actually dreaded the separation. He would be going home to his family of course. She would be staying on campus this year. On their last night together, she made sure to give him something to think about over break. She sneaked into his room well after lights out and teased him for well over an hour, pulling him to the brink and then stopping before he climaxed. He was begging her by the time it was all over. That would keep him from thinking about Narcissa.

Increasingly she found herself resenting Narcissa. Although she knew this arrangement between them was no more exciting to her than it was to him, Narcissa was still a rival. She may have had Lucius' affections, but he was not truly hers as long as this arrangement was still in place. For the present however, there was nothing to be done about it.

She awoke on Christmas morning and lay in her bed watching the snow fall softly and daydreaming about the last encounter with Lucius for a half hour before throwing on a robe and heading to the common room. Severus was already up, fully dressed and sitting in front of the designer Christmas tree.

"Happy Christmas Severus!"

"Happy Christmas." His greeting was flat as always and she noticed he was staring at two packages under the tree.

"What are those?"

"They're for us."

"Us?"

"Yes."

"From who?"

"I don't know." He handed her a beautifully wrapped box, and then picked up the other one, which seemed heavier and rested it on his lap.

Natalia rarely received presents and was thrilled to have something to open on Christmas morning. However she suspected that the polite thing to do was to allow others to open and enjoy their gift first, so she deferred to Severus. "You first."

Severus frowned, sighed in resignation, and began to unwrap the box with zero enthusiasm, until he realized what it was. Then a smile curled over his lips while he ran his hands across the cover of a very expensively bound book.

"Magical Plants of the Scottish Highlands, It's exactly what I wanted."

"Looks expensive."

"It is." He gulped. "I couldn't afford it." He picked up the card and read it. "Sasha."

"Reeeaaally?" Natalia dragged out her word, enjoying this new development. "She's a great girl Severus." Anyone is better than that cocktease Lily, she added mentally. Severus would surely hex her if she verbalized that little epistle.

He shrugged, "She's so wealthy this is but a trinket in her eyes."

"Yeah, but she thought about it enough to know exactly what you wanted, purchased it, wrapped it and made sure it was here waiting for you on Christmas morning. I think it's sweet that she took the time."  
>He rolled his eyes. Merlin he could be a stupid git sometimes. Natalia couldn't resist pushing just a little further.<p>

"And what did Lily Evans get you for Christmas?"

"Fuck you." He spat back.

"What a lovely sentiment for the occasion." She deadpanned.  
>He sighed, balled up the torn wrapping paper and tossed it into the fire. "Sorry. Open yours, let's see what you have."<p>

She'd peeked at the card and knew who it was from. "Oh I'll open it later." She tossed it back under the tree. "I think I'll get dressed and head down for breakfast."

Severus snatched the card off the gift when her back was turned. "Something to keep you warm when I can't. L. Who's L?"

"Oh ahh, one of the nun's at the orphanage."

One arched eyebrow completed what would eventually become the sardonic trademark expression of Severus Snape. "Often snuggle up with nuns do you?"

"Well, I ah." Natalia sputtered.

"Don't…lie…to me." He sneered. "It's Malfoy isn't it."

"Well, yes I suppose it's just a little thank you token since I've been tutoring him."

"A token?"

"Yes, you know. Probably the same trashy trinkets everyone gives to their teachers at Christmas. Just a gesture."

"Really?" His voice dripped with adolescent sarcasm.

"Yes."

"Open it."

"I'll open it later."

"Now. Let's see this trinket."

"Why are you so interested?"

"Why are you so evasive?"

"Fine." She sat down and began to unwrap it. "You're being very silly and you're about to be disappointed. I'm sure it's just a little…" but her words trailed off as she opened the box to discover a lovely forest green cashmere sweater. "Oh," was all she could say.

"Trashy trinket? I think not. That looks expensive."

She ran her hands over the soft fibers, almost like silk. Then she couldn't resist lifting it up and putting it against her cheek, forgetting Severus was even in the room.

The tag-without the price was still on the sleeve and Severus examined it.

"Lord Everly's. This must have cost at least $500 galleons."

"Oh no," Natalia shook her head violently as she folded the sweater and put it back in the box. "I'm sure you're mistaken."

"I am not. That's the most expensive designer in Diagon Alley. What's he doing buying you that?"

"Well, like you said, it's nothing to them really."

"Something to keep you warm? What's going on Natalia?"

"Severus, this is none of your business."

"Does Narcissa know?"

"There's nothing for her to know."

"All right Natalia, you keep your secrets. Just be careful."

"I always am."

_AN: Thanks to all who have added this to alerts or faves__ Butterbeers on me if you will be so kind as to leave a review for this chapter. (I hate to drink alone.)_

_Lots of you are liking Lucius which I am glad to see. I wondered if others would appreciate the softer side of him. Do you think she still dreams of Igor? Maybe? Or is it just me?_


	13. Chapter 13 Just When I Needed You Most

CHAPTER THIRTEEN

Just When I Needed You Most

When the rest of the students returned from winter break, Natalia and Lucius resumed their regular study date. At first**,** he was reserved, unsure of her affections after a long absence and with several weeks of his father constantly berating him. However, she was so exuberant when they reunited that he soon found himself drawn in again. The moment they were alone together, she threw her arms around his neck and hugged him tightly. His arms wound round her as he savored her loving embrace.

"My sweet girl, did you like your present?" Holding her close, he felt whole again.

"Oh Lucius**,** I adored it." Gushing was unusual for the normally conservative Natalia and it caught him off guard.  
>"It's the nicest thing I've ever owned. You're so generous."<p>

Although Lucius fancied himself a ladies man, his gifts to Narcissa were always met with disdain. To see that his gift thrilled Natalia, and that she did not take his generosity for granted, made his chest puff with pride. "I knew the color would look good with your hair and you can certainly wear it with your school robes."

"It's perfect. Thank you**.**" Pulling away from him, she tilted her chin to look up at him, before standing on tiptoes to kiss him softly. "I missed you."

As she trailed kisses across his chin**,** he sighed, nearly breathless. "Did you? Really miss me**,** I mean."

"Yes." She pulled back and looked up at him again. Brown eyes, so soft and kind**,** captivated him. "Severus is good company but it's not like being with you."

"It's not?" He asked absentmindedly.

"No." Her hands moved down his chest to his stomach before she began going for his belt buckle. "May I give you something in return?" Deft fingers had his trousers undone before he could think twice, not that he needed to. And when her silken fingers began to caress his manhood, he couldn't think at all.

As the end of April, Lucius began to be more earnest with his feelings. In prior years**,** Natalia had noticed the same mannerisms with some of the seventh year boys and their girlfriends. It seemed as if their feelings became more ardent as their time at Hogwarts drew to an end. It was almost as if they were going to miss Hogwarts so much, they felt the need to take a part of it with them, and frequently the couples got engaged in the last few months of school.

"Natalia**,** this is my last year at Hogwarts. Are you going to miss me next year?"

"Yes." She wasn't lying. She felt a closeness with him now that she never suspected would be possible. Next year would be lonely without him.

He smiled at her with a subtle curve of his lips that made his countenance appear far kinder than usual. "I'm going to miss our interludes. I'm going to miss you. I can tell you anything. You're the only person I feel completely comfortable with."

As much as she wished to believe him, her low self-esteem would not allow it. "That's because you don't care if you impress or offend me. It's immaterial**,** as long as I get you off." She wasn't really sure if that was true or not. She hoped it wasn't. But**,** this was after all, Lucius. So she made the remark as more of a fishing expedition.

"No. That's not it at all. You don't care about my money."

"Oh, make no mistake." She snorted. "I care very much about your money."

"Yes, but let's say I was not a Malfoy. If I were a Snape for instance, you would treat me the same. You don't differentiate."

"Severus would never force me to hide our friendship," she remarked rather pointedly. The stronger her feelings became, the more their secretiveness disturbed her.

Her point was lost on him. "I'm saying that you would view me the same; if I had millions of galleons or if I were penniless. I've never met anyone like you."

"You've been sheltered." She busied herself separating gillyweed into proper portions for the following day's class.

"You know, you never tell me about yourself. It seems I'm usually doing most of the talking." He pulled up a stool next to the lab table and watched her work, admiring her profile.

"That's because you're a narcissist." She replied without looking up.

Lucius laughed. "I love that you say exactly what's on your mind, even if you think it will offend me."  
>"I'm not trying to offend you. You are a narcissist. You know that much about yourself, don't you?" She was still a bit miffed at him.<p>

"Yes. But now we're talking about me again. I want to know about you."

She sighed and turned to face him. When he looked at her with those unnaturally pale eyes, she found it difficult to refuse him. "What would you like to know?"

"I don't know." He shrugged, having nothing particular in mind. "When is your birthday?"

"Saturday."

"Saturday?" He exclaimed. "Well, why didn't you say something?"

"Why would I?" Natalia shrugged her shoulders and went back to the gillyweed. "It's just another day."

"No it isn't. It's your birthday." He placed his hand on hers and pulled her away from the gillyweed. "That can wait.  
>Do you have plans?"<p>

"It's a Hogsmeade weekend. The castle will be quiet so I thought it might be a good time to study."

"Study? Out of the question. You'll spend the day with me."

"Doing what?"

"Whatever you like." He whispered, and then began kissing the spot just below her ear. But she pushed him off almost immediately.

"We can't spend the day together in Hogsmeade. Someone would see us."

"Then I'll take you away."

"Where?"

"Do you like the sea? We could sneak away, go to the coast. I know a secluded spot. We could have a picnic."  
>She raised her eyebrows at this suggestion, finding it comical. Lucius had never struck her as the picnic kind of guy.<p>

"A picnic?"

"Yes."

"Seriously?"

"Well…if you would rather do something else, we can." He sputtered. "What would you like to do?"

"Uhm no, that will be fine. I've never been on a picnic before, sounds lovely actually."

"It will be. I promise you. You'll see." He raised her hand to his lips and pressed them together. "I have rounds tonight. We'll firm up plans this week, all right?"

"All right." She whispered.

That night, Natalia was so excited that she could not sleep. To think, Lucius Malfoy would be whisking her away for a picnic by the sea as a treat for her birthday. Perhaps she was wrong about him, and they could be happy together. Perhaps his feelings were quite serious and his intentions honorable. It would mean a very different way of life for her. Perhaps she would become his bride. Perhaps she would be the next Lady Malfoy. Maybe she wasn't doomed to a life of poverty and loneliness. Lucius would save her from all of that. When she finally drifted off, well after midnight, her dreams were of him, of a romantic picnic, and of a life she hoped to live by his side.

The next morning, over breakfast, they stole glances at each other across the table. He smiled dreamily at her when no one was looking. Natalia couldn't resist playfully rubbing her foot against his leg under the table, which made him stifle a snicker. However, this enchanting exchange was soon interrupted by the blindingly blond specter of Narcissa Black. She stood behind Natalia, glaring at Lucius with a look of annoyance. He snapped to attention at the sight of her, his back straightening and his voice inflected with formality.

"Good morning Narcissa."

"Mother and father are coming to Hogsmeade this weekend." Her tone was businesslike, as if she just wanted to get the conversation over with.

"Oh? What a nice surprise for you."

"They wanted to take me to lunch on Saturday, and asked if you would be free to join us. Would you?"

"Uhm, well, actually no. I promised Natalia I would help her with Slughorn's inventory. She's been so kind to offer lab assistance this year."

Narcissa narrowed her eyes. "Father will be disappointed. You don't want him to be disappointed do you?"

"Uh, no. No, of course not." Lucius was visibly flustered and, now Natalia began glaring at him as well.

"All right." She hesitated and they stood there looking at each other, in a very awkward moment. "Would you walk me back to the Slytherin dungeon?"

"Oh, well I'll need to run by the lab first. I'm afraid Natalia and I left a mess before we finished last night. You go ahead."

"Let Natalia do it herself." She snapped. "That's why she gets paid isn't it?" She dragged the word 'paid' out like it was something shameful.

"Uhm, well."

"Go ahead Lucius." Natalia interrupted, eager to put this conversation to an end. "Narcissa is right. The housekeeping of the lab is my responsibility."

"All right." He didn't look at her again, but rose immediately to escort Narcissa out of the Great Hall as a proper boyfriend should.

Natalia felt ashamed of herself for having such foolish hopes and dreams the day before. How easily she was cast aside when Narcissa snapped her fingers.

Natalia feigned illness to get out of setting up for Slughorn's classes for the rest of the week. She couldn't face Lucius. How foolish she was to think that he ever cared anything for her, and that they could ever be together. He was the heir to a fortune of one of the most prominent families in England, the wizarding equivalent of royalty, and what was she? She was nothing more than a nameless orphan, a motherless girl with nothing to offer anyone. What was she thinking, getting her hopes up like that? She felt like a fool. Of course he was only using her.  
>Lucius waited for her after her classes, but she always found an excuse to avoid him. Since there were so many people around, he could not insist. As the week went on, he became more anxious. Despite how it may have appeared, he did not want to lose her.<p>

When the Saturday of her birthday rolled around, she watched all the students file down the path to the wizarding town. The castle was quiet and she used the opportunity to get into the lab and catch up on all the work she'd missed while avoiding Lucius that week. It was enough to occupy her mind, but didn't lighten her mood. The day wore on into evening and, eventually, she saw students starting to return to the castle. Still, she had no desire to see Lucius, particularly if he was with Narcissa. The humiliation she felt was unbearable. She finished up in the potions lab, and then, made a quick run for the Slytherin dungeon and the sanctity of the girl's dorm. The dorm too was empty; all the students were in the Great Hall for dinner. Having no appetite, Natalia changed into her pajamas and flopped down on her bed to read a few chapters of "Hogwarts, a History." Hopefully it would put her to sleep and this miserable 16th birthday would be over.  
>She quickly drifted off, but not for long, as she was soon awakened by the soft caress of a hand on her cheek and the smell of Lucius' cologne. She opened her eyes to find him sitting on the bed gazing at her.<p>

"What are you doing here? Head Boy or not, you can't be in here."

"Happy birthday Natalia." He whispered sadly.

"Lucius, you need to leave." Feeling disadvantaged, she quickly scrambled to a sitting position.

"I can't. I had to see you. Natalia, I'm so sorry. I had no choice."

"Yes you did." Tears began to burn her eyes.

"No, I have to keep her happy or father will be furious."

"What about me?" A single traitorous tear rolled down her right cheek. "Do you ever think about my feelings?"

"Yes." His manicured hand brushed her tear away. "It's been awful being away from you. I'm a wreck. Please forgive me."

"Lucius, you're graduating this year. What happens after that? With us, I mean."

"My family is traveling this summer. Then, in the fall, I'll go to university. You'll be here and I'll miss you terribly. I'll write you all the time. Perhaps I can manage to visit."

"And after that? I graduate in two years, then what?"

"You could come to university with me."

"I'd never be able to afford the same school."

"Well, it's close to Malfoy Manor. You could live there."

"Live there?"

"Yes. My mother is always looking for good help in the kitchen and the garden."

"Help? You want me to cook and landscape?"

"Well, normally our in-house domestic help has experience but I'm sure if I put in a good word, mother might hire you for upstairs duties."

"Upstairs duties?" Now she was completely indignant.

"Well uhm…"

"Let me get this straight, your idea of a future with me is my working as the upstairs maid so we can continue to sneak around. Is that right?"

"Natalia, any other arrangement is quite impossible. I adore you, but what you have to understand is…."

"Fuck…you."

Lucius flinched, unaccustomed to being addressed in such a manner. "Excuse me?"

"I said, fuck…you." Natalia clenched her jaw tightly and spoke through gritted teeth. If she relaxed her face, even for a moment her full fury would be unleashed on him. But the pressure was unbearable, and it was as futile as trying to contain a tidal wave.

"Natalia, really I…"

"Fuck you Lucius!" She hissed. With both hands, she lifted the history book on her lap and with all her might, whacked him on the arm. "Fuck you! Fuck Narcissa! Fuck your money! Fuck your family! Fuck your domestic staff! But most of all, fuck YOU!" With each expletive, she grew louder, and hit him harder again with the book.

He jumped off the bed and stood before her, rubbing his arm. "Natalia, you're being completely unreasonable." His voice was so matter of fact, he could have been discussing the weather which only served to incense Natalia.

"Get…the fuck..out." She spoke slowly, but with deadly venom.

"There's no need for that kind of talk."

Lucius' admonishment of her language made her snap again, and she screamed at him. "Getthefuckout!"  
>Without another word, he did as she ordered.<p>

A myriad of emotions played out in Natalia's heart, over the end of her relationship with Lucius, anger being at the top of the list. It was not he, however, whom she directed her anger toward, nor was it Narcissa or his family. It was directed inward at herself. She was angry at and ashamed of herself for allowing him to manipulate her. Of course it would end this way. It had to end this way. There was no other avenue for their relationship other than the end, or in continued secrecy. It was a reality that she knew all along, but chose to ignore, and now, she was paying the price.

This was a common pattern for her, this internalization of blame. She blamed herself for everything, always her worst critic. In many aspects of life it served her well. Her professors considered her to be one of the most responsible students at Hogwarts. While many passed blame for bad grades to their teachers, or reprimands for misdeeds to classmates, Natalia did not. She accepted responsibility for all of her own wrongs and many of the wrongs of others. In general, this was productive, no comma as it made her try harder. In this case however, it only depressed her.

Normally, she was loath for the school year to end. The orphanage was a dismal place to which she had no desire to return to. Now she was in desperate need of a change of scenery. Seeing Lucius everyday was a toxic, and seeing him with Narcissa was downright lethal.

Severus noticed her foul mood, but when his initial questions were met with evasiveness, he let it drop. He too was a private person and understood her need to keep some things to herself. In June, the entire fifth year student body sat for their O.W.L. examinations. Sasha Malfoy had planned a small picnic on the lawn after exams were over. Natalia wondered what the deal was with Malfoy's and picnics these days.

Sasha invited Severus, her distant cousin Regulus, whom she was close with, and Natalia. Natalia thought it was an odd little guest list. She wasn't sure why she was included other than to even out things. Neither she nor Regulus were interested in each other. Obviously, it was a ploy to spend some time with Severus before they all left for the summer. Sasha's devotion to Severus became increasingly evident to Natalia. Severus, as usual, remained completely obtuse.

When Natalia emerged from the castle with Regulus and some of the other Slytherin students, Sasha was already there waiting for them.

"Hey Regs! Hey Nat! How'd you do on the test?"

"Fine, I think." Natalia responded. Out of the corner of her eye, she saw Lucius emerge with some of his entourage.  
>"I don't know what the fuss is all about. Most of the questions were perfectly common sense." She said it loudly enough for Lucius to hear, though she didn't know why.<p>

"Slytherins never fail that test. It's only dumbed**-**down so the other houses stand a chance." Regulus added, while smirking good-naturedly at Sasha.

"Oh hush up! We'll see what you think next year when it's your turn to take the test."

"Not worried! I could have taken it this year and still beat you."

"Care to wager on that for next year?"

They were already getting on Natalia's nerves. All she wanted was to get this little soirée over with and hop the train back to London. "Where is Severus? Is he still joining us?"

"Yes!" Sasha pointed over to a lovely oak tree in the expansive courtyard. "He's right over there and it looks like he found the perfect picnic spot."

"Looks like he's got some company." Regulus suddenly narrowed his eyes as he watched his brother Sirius, and his friends approach the unsuspecting young Severus.

"Shit!" Natalia knew what was coming next. Severus had been the target of the Marauder's abuse since the day they arrived at school. "Why can't they just leave him alone?

"Because they're assholes." Regulus replied flatly.

"Expelliarmus!" They could hear Potter's voice across the campus and Natalia shuddered, thinking about what might come next. It was worse than normal however, as Severus was hoisted by his ankles into the air, while Potter kept his wand focused on his adversary. A crowd began to gather and almost immediately started to chant something they couldn't make out but that was certainly derogatory.

"Oh my heavens!" Natalia was too shocked to move. She felt so close to Severus due to their similarities, it might as well have been happening to both of them. They would always be the outcasts due to their backgrounds that they did not choose and could not change.

Sasha, red faced and appalled, was the first to react. "Those clods! I'll help him."

"You will not." Lucius was behind them, watching the whole thing. "Don't interfere Sasha. I won't have you getting involved in such a spectacle. Remember who you are." Lucius ordered his sister in such a tone that she hesitated. But when she looked back at Severus, she moved to defy her brother. She took two steps forward, but Lucius grabbed her and pulled her back. "I forbid it Sasha."

"You're the leader of his house! You have to stand up for him!" She cried as she tried to jerk out of his grasp, but he was too strong.

"Listen to me," he admonished. "He has to learn some lessons on his own."

"Lessons?" She cried. "He wasn't doing anything. They just walked up and started picking on him!"

Natalia watched in disgust. She knew the real reason Lucius didn't interfere. He would never stand up for someone he thought was of a lesser social rank, especially with the Marauders involved, which would be four against one. He wouldn't risk the same humiliation Severus was enduring, no matter how wrong they were. The only reason he didn't want Sasha to get involved was that it could potentially embarrass him. Everything she did was a reflection on the family. It had nothing to do with her safety. How Natalia loathed him in that moment. For once in her life, she spoke up.

"He's right Sasha. Severus has to learn that people of a higher station don't give a damn about anyone of a lesser background. He has to learn that although people in Slytherin House pretend to be your friend when it appeases them, they would never stand up for you. They have no feelings, and friendship means nothing to them."

Sasha barely heard her, eyes still on Severus. Lucius, however, looked at Natalia like he'd been punched in the stomach. Only Regulus Black seemed to have his wits about him as he pushed by.

"Enough of this!" He strode past them, wand drawn and eyes ablaze. "Expelliarmus!" Regulus had James easily disarmed before he knew what hit him.

"You little piss ant!" Sirius shouted at him, but before he could draw his wand, Regulus shot a body-binding curse at him, rendering him helpless. Then he levitated a small tree branch towards his brother and it began batting him on top of his head in quick staccato tempo.

"How's that?" Regulus snarled. "How's that, you stupid git?" He circled his brother sadistically, watching as Sirius winced. "Huh? Is that funny? Do you think it's funny getting picked on? What's that? I can't hear you? Speak up! Where's that Gryffindor courage now, huh? Not so tough, are you?"

Natalia was so busy watching Regulus torture his brother, which was long overdue in her opinion, that she didn't see Lily Evans approach the group. It wasn't until she heard Severus shout 'MUDBLOOD' that she knew Severus was on a different life course.  
>~~~~~~~<p>

"Oh Merlin." Severus sobbed. "How could I do that? How could I say that to her?" He was slouched on the couch in the Slytherin common room, well after lights out. He hadn't come to dinner despite Natalia's pleadings, and was now becoming a bigger basket case, with each passing moment.

"Severus, surely she knows you didn't mean it. You were angry. We say things we don't mean when we are angry. I'm sure if you talk to her…"

"No! You didn't see her face. It's…it's…unforgivable."

"There is no such thing as unforgivable. You've known each other for years. I'm sure if you go over there right now, and apologize, she will forgive you." Natalia honestly believed what she was saying. Although she didn't care for Lily, she knew they had been friends for a long time. Surely that meant something.'

"It's lights out already. I'll go in the morning."

"No! Go now! It's the grand gesture! Girls love that. Men who are willing to make a fool of themselves over a woman, generally profit from it."

"Do you really think so?"

"Yes. And look, if I'm wrong, you're no worse off than you were right? Come on, Slytherins seize the moment, right?"

"Right." He took a deep breath, stood, squared his shoulders and left the room.

Natalia sighed as she watched him go, hoping against hope that she was correct.

"Do you really believe that?" Lucius spoke entering from the boy's dormitory stairs. "Do you really believe that nothing is unforgivable and that you can always forgive?"

"Lucius, I no longer wish to discuss this. Let it go. As of tomorrow, you'll never see me again."

She expected a nasty remark but when she looked at him again, his chin wobbled every so slightly. "Never?"

"That's what you wanted right?"

"No. No, you know it's not."

"Phhft!" Natalia rolled her eyes. "Oh, that's right you want me to be the upstairs maid that specializes in hand jobs."

"Hush!" He looked over his shoulder. "Keep your voice down."

"You started this conversation. You know a month ago, I found myself nearly in love with you. But now I know you're a gutless, selfish, arrogant, vain, mean-spirited, lying, phony snob who is ashamed to have feelings for someone like me."

For a moment, she thought he might shed a tear, but then his jaw tightened. "Well, don't hold back, tell me how you really feel."

"I didn't want to believe any of those things, you know. When people would say things like 'oh that Lucius, what a pompous arse,' I would think to myself that they really didn't know you. But now, I know they did know you."  
>"Please Natalia."<p>

"If you'd like to prove that theory wrong, tell your family about me." She spat out her challenge. "Tell them you love me and you won't marry Narcissa. Tell them tonight. If you don't, I'll know that what we had wasn't real, that it was all a dream, and we'll go our separate ways, forever."  
>Lucius' shoulders slumped as he sighed. "You know I can't do that."<p>

"I know that you choose not to."

"I never wanted to hurt you Natalia."

"And yet, you did. Excuse me, I have to pack."  
><em><br>AN: HA! She got you Lucius—you slime! Ugh and poor Severus__ Hope you don't mind my taking a little liscense with Snape's Worst Memory—that is certainly sacred ground. Next chapter WILL have Igor again—scout's honor! I miss my Iggy but we had to give Nat & Lu a history before we could proceed. Big hugs to all! Hope you are staying warm—It's FREEZING on the east coast today! brrrrrrrr!_


	14. Chapter 14 Your Time is Gonna Come

CHAPTER FOURTEEN

Your Time is Gonna Come

When Natalia looked back over her sixth year at Hogwarts, she would remember it as the most uncomplicated time of her life. Lucius was gone and she no longer had to tailor her life to his whims. Though she was very sad about the way things ended before he left school, by the end of the summer, she was over him and quite anxious to return to school and immerse herself in her studies again.

Since she was now of age, she was allowed to work at The Three Broomsticks on weekends, which proved to be the most proper and lucrative occupation she had ever held. Mainly, she worked in the kitchen helping to prepare food or wash dishes. During the busiest times, she would also help clean tables and anything else the wait staff needed assistance with. Mme Rosmerta preferred the staff to serve by hand rather than using magic. This was a bone of contention with the majority of her employees who tended to be on the surly side. But Natalia, since she was raised in a very hardscrabble muggle environment, was not put off by this in the least. Because of her work ethic, Rosmerta took a liking to her, and gave her as many hours as she was able to around her school schedule, so long as Dumbledore did not object.

Severus withdrew from Natalia that year. Sasha too, for that matter. Since his humiliating experience with the Marauders, at the end of school the prior year, he was terribly bad-tempered and socialized more with Mulciber, Avery and a few other Slytherin undesirables that began to become known as "The Gang of Slytherins." Natalia, though she missed her friend, was glad to be so consumed by work and school, for she had no desire to associate with the likes of Avery or Mulciber. They were much like Lucius, conceited arrogant aristocrats.

Sasha still pathetically attempted to find any possible opportunity to spend time with Severus. Though he had been paid for years to tutor her in potions, her marks did not improve. However, it was not lost on Natalia that although her test scores and assignments were miserable, when it came down to actually brewing a potion, Sasha's work was exceptional. Although Sasha's poor marks allowed her father to keep paying Severus to tutor her, Natalia found her logic flawed in general. Severus prized knowledge and talent. To purposely appear stupid or inept in front of him would surely lower his opinion of her. But this was none of Natalia's affair, and so she said nothing. What did she know of men anyway?

The year went along uneventfully until one Saturday in May. It was a beautiful day and the streets of Hogsmeade were bustling with people. Consequently The Three Broomsticks was packed with patrons and Natalia was busy bussing tables. She enjoyed the hum of the place when it was busy. It excited her to think of the money being generated and that she had a part in it. She smiled as she zoomed around the room cleaning tables and doing any other tasks the wait staff ordered her to do. However, the next customer who walked in the door was to change her good mood.

Lucius entered and paused by the door, scanning the room. Natalia's blood turned cold at the very sight of him and she tried to head for the kitchen, but he quickly spotted her. Just before she could duck in the room, he touched her arm. She turned to meet those cool eyes but could not speak.  
>"Can we go somewhere?" His voice was raspy and unsteady. He cleared his throat before proceeding. "I've missed you."<p>

Natalia had no desire to regress into toxic relations with this man again. "Lucius I have a proper occupation now. I don't need your money any longer."

He closed his eyes and sighed. "I just want to talk to you. I miss having someone who listens to me. I miss having someone who doesn't judge me. Please Natalia. I'll sit on the other side of the room and you may hold my wand if you don't trust me."

"It will cost you at least $300 galleons if you want me to _hold_ your _wand_." She quipped, but he did not laugh. His expression was that of someone who looked beaten, much like a dog when scolded.

"Please. I can't talk to anyone else."

"All right." She took him by the hand and against her better judgment, led him out the back door into the alleyway. "No one will bother us here, but I'll have to get back to work shortly. What's troubling you?"

"I hate my life." The words seem to come out before he could think better of it.

Natalia, however viewed him as insincere and was unmoved. "Rather broad statement. Can you be more specific?" She crossed her arms and leaned back against the brick wall while attempting to look bored, and prepared for a melodramatic performance.

"I have…" Lucius faltered, unsure how to express himself, "no control over my destiny."

"You've always felt that." Natalia stuck her lower lip out and blew, causing her bangs to fly up. "You've always told me your life was all laid out for you. What's so different now?"

"You are correct. I guess now, that I'm closer to adulthood; the reality of it is getting too close. I'm not ready for it all." He was obviously rattled but was trying very hard to hold himself together. Natalia began to soften. Obviously something far more sinister was troubling him or he wouldn't have come to her. Lucius was extremely proud and would have never come crawling back unless he had no other avenues.

"Talk to me Lucius." She reached for his hand and gave it a reassuring squeeze. "What aren't you ready for?"

"For one thing, my father, he's completely aligned himself with someone named Lord Voldemort. Have you heard about him?"

"I have heard of him, Slytherin alum, he practices dark magic. I hear he's quite a fanatic. But that's nothing new. You and your family have always believed in magical purity."

"Yes, but this wizard is different. You should hear the things he's talking about doing."

"What is he talking about?" She focused on a patronizing dispassionate tone like that of a therapist. Lucius surely needed therapy worse than most people she knew.

Lucius looked up and down the alley before responding in a whisper. "He wants to…annihilate all muggles and half bloods."

"Well, that's not only ridiculous but impossible." Natalia scoffed at him, the very idea seeming absurd and out of reach. How little they knew then.

"I used to think so, but he's gaining momentum. My father forced me to join him."

Natalia merely shrugged. At this point in their lives, she had no sense of the gravity of what that meant. "Well, if you don't believe in him, stand up for yourself. Just tell him you've changed your mind and you won't be a part of it."

"It's not that simple." He winced, and rubbed his forearm. "I'm afraid. Have you heard about these disappearances?"

"Yes. Rumor has it that werewolf Greyback and his ilk are at work."

"That's what he wants you to think. It's not Greyback. Well, if it is, he's acting on someone else's orders."

"Then who is it?"

"I can't tell you without endangering you. But Natalia, if Riddle and his followers come here, if you have any interaction with them, you just do as they say. They are extremely dangerous and will cut down anyone who opposes them. They've already locked in on Mme Rosmerta."

"What? What do you mean locked in on her? Should I warn her?"

"No. She has others looking after her and she's well aware of her plight. I'm telling you this for your sake only. Be careful." His hand remained firmly in hers and he squeezed it to emphasize his point.

The terror in his normally passionless eyes seemed to invade her own heart, for it quickened and a feeling of dread washed over her. Though she was unsure in that moment, what exactly she was dreading. "Lucius, you're scaring me."

"You should be scared. We all should be. Promise me you'll be very cautious."

"All right."

"Now listen, I'm going to let it slip to a few select people that you have discovered your birth parents and they were both purebloods."

"That's a lie, Lucius."

"Just a little white lie, it won't hurt anyone. It can only help you. You'll go along with the story."

"All right. Lucius, it scares me to see you like this."

"A little fear will serve you well."

"I'm worried about you, Lucius."

His face softened and he reached up to gently caress her cheek. "You're worried about me? That's so…lovely." No one worried about him anymore. His life was in vertigo and no one appeared to care in the least. "I've never met anyone with a kinder heart." His voice cracked and he suddenly collapsed against her, shaking and holding her with shocking force.

"Lucius," Natalia hesitated, unsure how to comfort him, but then, reluctantly returned his embrace. "What is it? There's more, isn't there?"

"I can't take it Natalia. My life is spinning out of control. They're going to make me marry Narcissa."

She bristled like a cat at this fact that she knew all too well and did not care to be confronted with again. "You've always known that day would come."

"Yes, but now it's almost here and I won't do it, I tell you. She's a nightmare, a cold, cold woman. All she cares about are possessions. I can't spend all eternity with that witch." Bitterness laced his every word and she felt his body tense in her arms.

Natalia stroked his long buttery hair, longing to be his comfort. Though she thought herself over him, she still cared very much about what happened to him and did not wish to see him so distraught. "I'm sorry Lucius. I never wanted you to be unhappy."

"I'm sick of them all." He pulled away and looked at her, his gray eyes bloodshot and red-rimmed. "Natalia, if I defied my father, if I told him I refused to marry her, he would turn me out."

"Do you really think so? You are his son. I'm sure he adores you."

"I know so. He would be ashamed of me. But, at the moment, I'm ashamed of myself." His eyes dropped to the ground. Natalia knew full well it was probably an act, but somehow she was unable to stop herself from gently touching his cheek and lovingly guiding his gaze to her.

"You have choices, Lucius. You don't have to continue as you have. You can choose your path. If he turns you out, so what? You're intelligent and hard working, you would find your way without him. Do it."

He sniffed, looked up at her, searching the depth of her eyes. "You're beautiful, Natalia. Have I ever told you that?"

She rolled her eyes. She knew she was not beautiful and it annoyed her to hear him say something so obviously patronizing. "Yes, you have, but usually right before you have an orgasm, so I don't set much store by it."

His response was a lackluster smirk with no energy behind it. "I suppose I deserve that. I do think you are beautiful however." His soft, underutilized hands caressed her cheeks. "I still dream of being with you."

"Lucius, please don't."

"Of you wanting to be with me because you loved me. Silly isn't it?"

As always, when he spoke in such a self-deprecating manner, her heart warmed towards him. She knew what it was like to feel unwanted.

"Natalia, is it always to be a dream with us? Could it ever be possible for us to be together?"

Her immediate thought was "no." The two of them together would be quite impossible. However, looking into his eyes, feeling the tender touch of his hand, and the quiver in his voice touched her, and she could not bring herself to hurt him. Despite all they had been through, his conduct in that moment made her consider what he said very carefully. Could he have changed?

"Sometimes the most beautiful realities are born of dreams." She whispered.

He pushed a heavy breath out of his chest and pulled her against his chest. Had they not had such a miserable history, she might have felt almost safe in his arms. However, history could not be rewritten, and rather than safe, she found herself unbalanced. She was ready to make an attempt at trust, but it would be tempered with knowledge of what had come before.

"I have some money father doesn't control. If I walked away from everything, we could buy this place. I hear Rosmerta wants to sell it. We could run it together. We could do it properly and make a fortune."

She found his plan rather touching. A happy, middle class existence together, tucked away at Hogsmeade could be a lovely way to live, but it was absolutely absurd, considering the source. She giggled. "Lucius Malfoy wants to be a proper publican? I never thought I'd hear the day."

"Don't tease me. I'm serious. I told you I love you, and I meant it. I still do. I've been horrible to you all these years and you have borne it. You could have turned me in many times, but you didn't. You listened to me, treated me with care. Ahh, and the way you touched me, it was the stuff of dreams."

"Lucius, don't say things you will regret later."

"I'll never regret them. Be honest with me. If I left, if I walked away from it all tomorrow, would you accept me? If I was completely unencumbered, would you give me a chance to prove myself worthy of your love?"

Her heart was breaking under the weight of such seemingly sincere confessions. Despite all she knew about him, she replied, "Yes."

"Ah," he buried his forehead on her shoulder.

"But you remember the price."

"I've never been more acutely aware of what a life with you would cost me."

"I'm not sure of your sincerity. It's one thing to say these things, quite another to carry them out."

"What can I do to prove my love for you? Name it."

"Tell your parents about me," she demanded. "Tell them today. I want to meet them."

He froze. "For the moment, that's quite impossible."

Her suspicions were immediately confirmed by his hesitation. "You make it possible, Lucius. Despite all that's happened, you do touch my heart on occasion. But I could never be with someone who is ashamed of me. I'll accept you, but you must tell your parents."

"All right, I will." He bowed to kiss her hand. "I'm going to speak to father right now. Promise me you'll be waiting for me. I'm about to throw everything away for you. This is serious. I must have your assurance that I'm doing this for a reason."

"I promise."

Natalia had a glimmer of hope that perhaps Lucius would turn out to be the man she knew he could be. Surely, it was possible. No one was a hopeless case, particularly at such a young age. If he was sincere in his declarations, she could put the past behind her and give happiness with him a chance. Perhaps if he knew love, if he had someone who would treat him with care and be kind to him, if she could get him away from his pretentious family, he could change. Her compassionate heart wanted to believe he could change and, for days, she waited for an owl or a visit from him. Her minimal hopes were dashed however, when a week later, she opened The Daily Prophet and read the headline, "Pureblood Families Align Themselves, Lucius Malfoy to Marry Narcissa Black."

She was seated across from Severus and Regulus at breakfast that morning as she read those words that nearly made her regurgitate her pumpkin juice. This time, however, she was disappointed, but not devastated, for she knew better than to get her hopes up too much. Lucius had always been at worst, a sadist and at best, a disappointment. It was no more than she should have expected. Still, it insulted her. How dare he beg her to take him back, only to toss her aside again? What kind of man did that to a woman?

"Hey Sash! Whom did you get post from?" Regulus called to his cousin as she passed their table, examining a letter. Natalia jerked herself out her daydream. "Is that spotty brother of yours sending you his gift registry already?" A couple of the Slytherin boys snickered, as did Sasha.

"I'm sure he's putting the finishing touches on it before he sends it out to all of us. You know what a control freak he is." Sasha laughed and tossed her hair presumably to attract the attention of Severus, who merely washed down a mouthful of toast with his tea, unmoved. "Actually, it's from Karkaroff."

Natalia's ears immediately perked up.

"Oh? Sit down!" Regulus patted the open seat between he and Severus. "Let's hear what your boyfriend is up to."

"He's not my boyfriend." Sasha snapped. Severus did look up at this, but his face remained impassive. Still, he looked, and Natalia wondered if it was just his nosey curiosity, or some other reason. Sasha was too busy glaring at Regulus to notice. Natalia found the whole scene quite entertaining.

"What is he then?" Regulus snooped, surely just to annoy Sasha. "You two correspond quite a bit."

"Just friends!" She opened the letter, and six tiny quidditch brooms flew out and whirled over the table in formation for several moments before fusing together and producing a mini firework. A few at the table clapped. Sasha was all smiles. Severus rolled his eyes and went back to his breakfast. She began to read Igor's letter.

"Oh wow! He says he's been chosen to represent the Russian National team this summer at world cup."

"He's certainly lying to impress you." Severus snarked.

"No. It's true." Regulus corrected him. "Rodolphus owled me last week, and told me it was a distinct possibility."

"Humphf!" Was the only come back Severus could muster.

"Good for him." Regulus raised his glass, before taking a swallow. "Better watch out, Sasha. It's being held in the south of France, this year. He'll be dripping in French quidditch groupies and you'll now have competition."

"They can have him." Sasha shrugged.

"What are you doing over here?" Sirius walked up to the table with James and Lily not far behind. "Slumming? Let's go, we have charms." Sirius glared at his brother, who matched his look in intensity and loathing.

"Oh shoot." Sasha ignored his tone. "We're late." She scrambled to join her housemates as they left the hall. Severus watched Lily with a heartbroken expression as she walked out with James' arm around her. Natalia was already in the mood to go back to bed and pull the covers over her head. Lucius and Narcissa, Igor and Sasha, and, now Severus, with his pathetic mooning over Lily Evans, it was all too much to take before 8 o'clock in the morning. She sighed heavily, feeling very unlovable and alone. Why was it that these three girls could collect hearts so casually, like shells on a beach, while she remained trapped in isolation? What was wrong with her? Was her lack of parentage and her poverty, to be a curse her entire life?  
>Severus noted her foul temper. "What's the matter with you?" He asked, but didn't sound particularly curious.<p>

"Severus, might I ask you something?"

"Depends."

She looked over her shoulder before proceeding. "What is it with girls like Sasha and Lily?"

"What do you mean 'what is it with them?' Honestly, Natalia, you're picking up a revolting amount of slang in that pub."

"I mean, why do they just have men falling at their feet like that? Particularly when they don't seem to care, one way or the other?"

"They're beautiful." He breathed, then seemed to regret his candor. He looked back at his plate and Natalia could see his neck slowly turning scarlet.

"Beautiful?" They were very attractive girls, but surely that couldn't mean everything. "So it all comes down to looks, is what you're telling me?"

"No, not just looks, everything about them is beautiful." He smiled sadly.

"Severus is right." Regulus inserted himself into the conversation as he pointed his fork with a piece of sausage stuck to the end in the general direction of Sasha. "I disagree about Evans but Sasha, is a thoroughbred. Not just looks, the way she carries herself, her smile, her manner, she always smells good. I know she's my cousin, but it's the truth. If you can get a girl like that, you know your life will be better. Who wouldn't want to wake up next to a girl like that, or someone like Narcissa for that matter? Beautiful girls, that is the ticket to a long and happy life."

Although he meant no direct offense, Natalia was insulted. He certainly wasn't including her in on that list, but then why should he? She'd never taken time with her appearance. She had no money for clothes, other than school robes, and she bought those big so she could get at least two years wear out of them. She couldn't afford a decent haircut, much less cosmetics or perfume. She cut it herself and generally did a mediocre job. Utterly humiliated, she tucked her hair behind her ear and excused herself from the table.

The last week of school was a very busy time at The Three Broomsticks. Students were studying less and enjoying Hogsmeade more frequently, even when the visits were unauthorized. It was though an epidemic of spring fever was sweeping the castle. Natalia worked as much as Rosmerta would allow but remained in somewhat of a funk since the discussion of beauty at the breakfast table. Rosmerta noticed the change in her favorite employee and one Sunday, at the end of her shift, she called her into her office.

"What's the matter with you these days, Natalia?"

"Nothing."

"Don't lie to me. You've been walking around here with a broomstick up your ass for weeks. That foul mood of yours sticks out like a dog's bullocks. I'd hoped to promote you to waitress next year, but with this piss poor attitude, it is out of the question." As always Rosmerta's language was colorful but coarse.

"I've waitressed twice before when it was busy. The tips are horrible for far more work, so no thank you."

"Well of course they're horrible, look at you!"

Natalia looked up at her in shock. "What do you mean?"

"I mean look at you! You've got that stupid butch haircut that looks like you did it yourself. You never wear makeup. You've always got those baggy clothes on and a shitty attitude. How in the hell do you expect to make any tips like that?"

Natalia's normally tough shell began to crack under such flat out criticism. Her chin began to shake and her eyes burned. She knew she was unattractive and that her clothes were unfashionable. She was uncomfortable around people for good reason and didn't know how to be friendly. Logically, she knew all of this, but to hear such brash words from Mme. Rosmerta, whom she liked and admired as a shrewd and successful businesswoman was disastrous.

"Oh for Merlin's Sake!" Rosmerta tossed a handkerchief at her. "Don't start blubbering. I'm not saying this to make you feel bad, merely to point out that your packaging is bad for business. I thought you had a good enough business head to understand that."

"Packaging?"

"Yes. If you'd put a little more effort into your appearance, and at least fake a smile once in a while, you'd see massive tips coming your way. Look at Roxanne. She's not only one dumb witch but she's a terrible waitress, always dropping something or forgetting an order, but big tits equal big tips, and she's raking it in."

"Excuse me?"

"Don't tell me you don't notice the way she leans over men's tables so they can look down her blouse. She laughs at all their retarded jokes and wears her clothes two sizes too small. Men lose their minds and that cow gets 25% tips all night long."  
>Natalia looked down at her flat chest and frowned.<p>

"Oh don't despair Nat. You're not completely unfortunate looking. You have lovely eyes and your body has…potential. Why, with the right haircut, some makeup and decent clothes including a push up bra, you could be quite…adequate."

"Adequate?"

"Well, enough to finally turn that Snape boy's head anyway."

"Severus? Phhft!"

"No? I thought you liked him. Oh well, I suppose he is a bit of a bum sucker. Well, at any rate you'll get bigger tips."

I suppose I haven't put much effort in. I'm just so busy, and there never seems to be much money."

"You have a wand, don't you."

Natalia looked at her blankly.

"There are a few glamour spells I could teach you. I'm surprised the girls in the dorm haven't taught you already."

"I don't socialize much."

"No, I suppose you don't. Summers at that manky old orphanage probably don't help either."

"No."

"Well, why don't you stay here for the summer?"

"Here?"

"Sure. I could use the extra help in the pub and I've got a few outside events that will require more staff. You can stay upstairs in one of the rooms."

"Oh, I'm sure I couldn't afford a room for the summer."

"Nonsense. They are never full once school is out. You can have the smaller one in the back. How about it?"

The possibility of spending the summer in Hogsmeade under the wing of Mme Rosmerta was surely the most exciting thing to happen to Natalia since she was invited to attend Hogwarts. Immediately she jumped at the opportunity. "That would be wonderful Mme. Rosmerta."

"Good. I'll speak to Albus so he can square it with the orphanage. You get back to work."

"Thank you so much."  
>~~~~~~~<p>

Igor and Levin sat in front of the enormous stone fireplace in their dorm at Durmstrang. They shared a section of the Durmstrang castle that was know as the quidditch house. Although the quarters were rather Spartan, it was still far more comfortable than the other sections of the castle that tended to be drafty. There was a definite social order at their school and Igor and Levin were at the top of the food chain.

The quidditch house stayed on the chilly side and so they were sitting by the fire to enjoy the warmth as long as possible prior to turning in for the nicked some popcorn from the kitchen and they were sharing an enormous bowl between them. At the all male school, table manners were nearly non-existent. They shoved huge handfuls in their mouths, chewed very little and sprayed food when they spoke. What did it matter? It was just the boys.

"I can't wait to get the hell out of here for the summer." Igor mumbled with a mouth full of popcorn.

"Just a few more weeks." Levin responded before shoving more popcorn in his mouth.

"Oblonsky is driving me insane. The old bugger is constantly on my ass about something."

"Eh! Talk about ass, in a few weeks we'll be in the south of France getting so much ass. I'm talking World Cup ass comrade!"

"You're talking out your ass at the moment. It that all you ever think about?"

Levin paused before responding with a snort. "Yes!"

Igor chuckled, throwing a kernel into the air and catching it with his mouth.

"What do you think of?"

Igor chuckled again. "Ass!"

It was Levin's turn to chuckle and he threw a handful of popcorn at Igor. Igor quickly responded by throwing a handful back in his friend's face.

"So, have you heard from that bird you met over Christmas? The one with the dark curls. What was her name?"

"Angie."

"Yeah. She was cute."

"Yes, she was. Haven't talked to her though. I think she had a boyfriend."

"Didn't stop her from hooking up with you."

"Well, you know…. what can I say?"

"What about that Aussie chick from last summer?"

"Jess?"

"Yeah, Jess. I liked her. She was kind of wild."

"You have NO idea."

"Ah! My friend is a babnik! Give me an idea."

"Gentleman don't kiss and tell."

"Well, when I find a gentleman, I'll remember that."

"You're on your own."

"What about Sasha? Is your father still pushing the match?"

"It's mother that's pushing it. She'd love to see me marry an English girl, particularly that one. Status, you know."

"So marry her."

"I'd rather just snog her. I like snogging her."

"Just snogging."

"Yeah. You know when she's with me; her mind is always someplace else. I think she likes me, but there no real fire there."

"Fire?"

"Yeah, the fire, the passion, the hunger" Igor waved his hand in the air, searching for the perfect words. "It's just not there."

"On her side or yours?"

Igor thought for a moment before truthfully answering, "Both."

"The why do you hook up with her?"

Igor shrugged. "She lets me feel her boobs."

"Oh." Levin raised his eyebrows. As always he was impressed and a little jealous of his friend's way with the fairer sex.  
>Both boys stared at the fire, lost in their musings of women's breasts.<p>

"So have you ever felt the fire?"

Igor smiled as he recalled the one time when he truly felt the fire. "Once."

"With who? Jess? Angie?"

"I don't know her name." Igor smiled, never taking his eyes off the fire. He stared at the flames, trying for the hundredth time in the last year and a half to recall elusive details of his lavender girl.

"Oh not that again."

"Agh! I can't help it!" Igor threw his head back and covered his face in semi-shame.

"It's been a year. No almost two years."

"I know!" Igor mumbled into his hands. "It's so frustrating. I can't stop thinking about her."

"What is there to think about? You don't even know her name. You were so hammed you don't remember what she looks like."

"I don't need to know all those trivial details. It was the feeling. I'll be searching for her forever."

"Ugh! You whine like a little girl! I'm going to bed." Levin stretched and yawned before trudging off to bed.

Igor set the bowl of popcorn on the floor and stretched out on the couch. He reached into his pocket and pulled out the letter he received from his lavender girl so long ago. The paper no longer smelled like lavender, but the words still warmed his heart. He vaguely remembered details through the haze of that night. Her lying on top of him in while they both laughed over something. What had they laughed at? He couldn't remember. She'd helped him to bed on the ship and even pulled his boots off for him. He remembered her brushing the hair out of his eyes and the fragrance of lavender on her wrist. And then, she lied about her name. Why had she done that? What could be so terrible about her identity that she would hide it from him? As always, his imagination ran away and he drifted off trying to reason through it all.

_AN: OK so I just skimmed over a fairly uneventful year. Promise lots of action in the next chap. Actually hold on tight-it may be too much action for some people. Please be so kind as to leave your thoughts or shoot me a pm-I don't bite...unless Iggy asks nicely:)_


	15. Chapter 15 Barracuda

CHAPTER FIFTEEN

Barracuda

_AN: WARNING! THIS IS A VERY DARK CHAPTER. While not graphic, it will be violent and potentially offensive. Please skip this one if you don't like that type of thing. Remember, they are Death Eaters. This is how they roll.  
>Dear Igor,<br>Congratulations on making the Russian National Team. I'm thrilled for you but certainly not surprised. You are by far the most gifted flier I've ever seen. It's been two years since I last saw you fly and I'm sure you have improved._

_You probably do not remember me. We met at Hogwarts when Durmstrang was there for the Tri-Wizard Tournament. Actually I'm certain that you don't remember me. You were quite intoxicated when we met. I've never forgotten you though.  
>But I'm rambling. <em>

_My purpose in writing you is to remind you that you that you were born to play this sport. I know the Irish and Bulgarian teams are formidable, and the Russian team hasn't gone this far in the playoffs before, but with you as Seeker, I know you can win it. You know you can in your heart, surely you know that. Sometimes I've seen you get a little nervous before a match, but you need not be. You have every right to be where you are, and everything you need to win the match.  
>I'll be there to cheer you on. Best of luck.<br>_Minerva McGonagall (well, not really)

"Levin! Levin! Look! Look at this!" Igor ran across the locker room waving the parchment at his friend, eyes wild with excitement. So frantic was he that he tripped over a wooden bench in front of Levin's locker and nearly smashed headfirst into the locker.

"Easy Iggy! Don't knock yourself out before the Irish get a shot at you." Levin chuckled and helped his friend right himself.

"Read this!" Igor shoved the parchment into Levin's hand. "Go on read it!"

"Dear Igor…" Levin mouthed through the words as he skimmed the letter with disinterest. He shrugged and handed the letter back to his friend. "Fan mail?"

"Fan mail!" Igor spat indignantly and snatched the letter back. He looked at the elegant but not overly flourished script again and smiled. "It's her! She's here! Lavender girl, she's really here!"

"Great, she and 40 thousand other people."

"I'm going to see her tonight." He declared with a smirk as he carefully folded the letter and stuck it in his breast pocket. "I can feel it in my bones." Foolishly, he turned his back on Levin.

"Feel it in your boner is more like it!" Levin swatted his friend on the back of his head. Igor whipped around and instinctively reared back his fist, but did not strike.

"You're brain is turning to shit, Iggy. Get your head in the game. Women only want winners. If we lose tonight, no one is getting laid."  
>Igor smirked. "You're not getting laid, either way."<p>

Levin playfully pushed his friend's shoulder, knocking him off balance. Igor pushed him right back and they were soon laughing and getting rougher by the moment, like two puppies in the same litter.

"Levin! Karkaroff! Knock it off! Get your sorry carcasses over here so we can go over our strategy one more time." The Russian National coach, Leoned Baranov was not as vindictive or hostile as Oblonsky, but he was every bit as strict and the two young men wasted no time in snapping to attention and doing what he said.

Natalia blossomed over the summer under Mme. Rosmerta's guidance. Her raven colored hair was longer now and bounced on her shoulders when she walked. Unlike Igor's untamed mass of darkness, Natalia's hair was normally straight and stringy like Snape's. However, with a few glamour spells and some special shampoo that Rosmerta shared the recipe for, it was now thick, shiny, and full of body.  
>Shortly after she moved into her immaculate but tiny little room over the bustling kitchen, Mme Rosmerta had given her a lesson in makeup which Natalia actually liked to apply more than she expected. The daily application ritual reminded her of putting on a mask. Behind the shadows and shading, Natalia could hide her true face and all it's flaws. She could be someone else, which pleased her immensely. The only procedure she did not care for was eyebrow waxing. Mme Rosmerta swore by this old-fashioned muggle method, saying it was too dangerous to use a spell pointed so close to your eye. As painful as this process was, Natalia thoroughly agreed with her, and the results were worth it. Her face now had a graceful quality to it, with her already high cheekbones being complimented by the arch of her brow. Dark brown eyes added a mysterious quality to her and she was quickly becoming a favorite with the male patrons.<p>

A summer eating the flavorful food from the pub had also done her a world of good. A much-needed ten pounds was now distributed quite nicely on her formerly lanky frame. For the first time, she had a womanly figure. The patrons noticed this also, and she was soon receiving tips to rival that of the dim witted Roxanne. When regular customers started asking for Natalia by name, Mme Rosmerta gifted her with a push up bra. At first, Natalia was embarrassed, but Rosmerta, tacky but shrewd, insisted she wear it. Now her tips regularly topped 30 percent.

Natalia felt confident and at least passable in appearance, no longer ugly anyway. Gradually, she came out of her shell and her personality became more distinct. Her co-workers found her direct but witty, pretty but not overtly sexual, kind but fair. On the rare occasions when Rosmerta had to be away, she trusted Natalia to run the operation. At first, the other staff was resistant, not wanting to answer to such a young girl. But Natalia managed with such an air of calm mixed with kindness, that they found themselves wanting to do their very best for her. When she was in charge, the business hummed along smoothly.

Every morning over coffee and toast with Rosmerta in the kitchen, she would read the sports page of the Daily Prophet. Rosmerta assumed she just had a strong interest in quidditch, but really, she was only scanning the paper for news of Igor Karkaroff. Occasionally, there would be a picture of him flying on his broom, with his long hair whipping behind him and usually raising the golden snitch over his head in victory. Several times, she would also note a little blurb in the society section. 'Igor Karkaroff, the Russian quidditch phenom was seen canoodling with Sasha Malfoy, heiress to the vast Malfoy fortune, in the south of France.' 'Suave Slave seduces Siberian sex kittens." That one was the worst. There was a picture of he and Levin sitting in some kind of establishment with a girl on each arm. The girls didn't look like 'sex kittens' per se, but it was Rita Skeeter's first year at the Prophet, and she was trying to make a name for herself. Hence, no one was safe if she thought it would sell papers.

When Rosmerta informed everyone that the entire staff would be working the World Cup, Natalia was ecstatic, and watched the paper intently hoping against all hope that the Russian team made the playoffs. When they trounced the Bulgarians to earn a wild card slot, she immediately sat down at her rickety little writing desk to pen him a letter. She'd written at least five letters, and incinerated every one when she decided they were, too gushy, too business-like, or too presumptuous. Finally, she had the right draft. She read it over at least twenty times before owling it away.

She had no expectation of a reaction from him. She just wanted to give her dear Igor a few words of encouragement before the match. If he was still as she knew him at Hogwarts, she knew he would be extremely nervous before the match. Everyone saw him as this confident, well-rounded, handsome athlete. But Natalia knew that deep down, he doubted himself. She would have loved nothing more than to be by his side again, to give him a little reassurance as she had years ago, but security would be tight around the team and there was no chance of getting close to him. Besides, he probably wouldn't remember her anyway. After she sent the letter, she began to realize that he would merely see it as a fan letter and felt incredibly foolish. Fortunately, he would have no idea who it was from.

Each of Rosmerta's staff was assigned to work one of the elite skyboxes. Each box was rented for an exorbitant amount of money and contained facilities for twenty-four wizards. Natalia, being one of the favored staff, was assigned the box right next to the Minister's box, which afforded one of the best views of the pitch. Surely it would prove to be a veritable jackpot of tips. She made sure to look her very best and even used a spell to lower the neckline of her dress just a tiny bit, and raise the hem of her skirt, just a bit more, but not too much. She certainly didn't want to look like Roxanne, no matter what kind of tips were at stake.

Natalia entered the box ready for an entertaining night of charming middle-aged wizards. When she saw the group she would be serving, her blood turned cold. It was if she had walked into the Slytherin common room from a few years ago. The Lestrange brothers, Mulciber, Avery, Regulus, and a couple others she did not know were already there. They all looked at her as soon as she walked in and she felt every bit of confidence drop down into her shoes. Fortunately, none of them seemed to recognize her, for they quickly resumed their conversations. Scanning the room, she then saw Crabbe and Goyle and she knew without looking further, who else would be there. The crowd parted slightly and then her eyes rested on Lucius.

His eyes smoldered like blue fire and his lips curved into a smile designed solely for seduction. He licked his lips and raised his eyebrows slightly. It was a lascivious invitation to a woman he was admiring but did not recognize. Natalia knew she looked different but he of all people should have remembered her. Her eyes angrily narrowed to meet the heat of his gaze and when they did, his own widened with surprise. The motive behind his smile changed his expression immediately and it now became one to greet someone he genuinely cared for.

"Natalia! Is that you?" The lovely dark voice of her dear friend Severus, came from behind her.

"Yes! How are you Severus?" Relief swept over her and impulsively, she gave him a hearty hug, which he returned but quickly pulled away from.

He blinked several times before continuing. "I didn't recognize you! Your hair…"

"Oh, yeah." She smoothed it down, now embarrassed at her appearance that she had been so previously proud of. "It grew out a little." But Severus wasn't looking at her hair any longer, his eyes traveled down her body until the rested on her newly ample and pushed up breasts. This behavior was shocking coming from him and she was indignant. "Severus." She whispered firmly.

"Oh, uhm…" He turned such a deep shade of crimson, she would swear he was a Metamorphmagus. "How was your summer?" He cleared his throat and tried to regain his composure. "Anything interesting happening at The Three Broomsticks?"

"No. It was a busy summer with work, but other than that nothing very interesting happened."

"Ha! I disagree." Regulus Black slinked up behind her and snaked an arm around her waist. He looked directly at her breasts and slurred, "It looks to me like quite a lot happened." Then he giggled and winked at Severus, who now looked mildly horrified.

"Hush up!" She hissed at him. He was still younger than her, even if he was a Black. She would make sure to fix him when they returned to school.

"Oh relax Nat, I'm just kidding." He kissed her quickly on the cheek. "Good to see you love. Severus, did you find the loo?"

"Over there." Severus pointed to the door he'd just come out of, and Regulus trotted off in that direction.

"Merlin! This is going to be a long night." Natalia huffed.

"You have no idea." Severus rolled his eyes.

"Oi! Snape! Quit chatting up that waitress so she can start fetching us drinks! The match is about to start." Rudolphus Lestrange yelled across the room.

"I'd better get to work." Natalia pushed him aside and went to stash her bag and don her serving apron. She checked herself in the mirror over the sink. She did look good. It was no wonder no one recognized her. Mentally she psyched herself up to face these hooligans. She was just as good as they were, and it was time to start acting like it. She would charm them like any other pub patron and by the end of the night**,** she would be walking out of here with her pockets lined with cash. She only hoped they would allow her to watch a little of the match so she could see her Igor.

She loaded up a tray of butter beers and hoisted it above her head with one hand, a trick she had mastered over the summer. She walked over to where the young men had taken their seats and began to hand them out. Still, they were not recognizing her, so she pushed the issue.

"Here you are Rudolphus." She said handing him a beer. "Lovely to see you again."

His brother, Rabastan, and a few others snickered and looked at Rudolphus for an explanation.

"Lovely to see you as well," he sneered. "Forgive me, but I am at a disadvantage. Have we met?" His eyes twinkled they way they normally did when he looked at Bella Black.

"I should say we have. We were housemates for several years. Don't you recognize me?" Her heart was pounding. Three months ago she would never have had the confidence to flirt with the handsome Rudy Lestrange.

"You do look familiar." Flagrantly, he swept his eyes up and down her body.

"Natalia. Natalia Smith from Slytherin. I was a couple years behind you."

He gaped at her, as did his brother, Crabbe and Goyle. Beyond them was another extremely well manicured, if unsettling looking gentleman who was carefully watching the entire exchange and smirking in amusement.

"Skinny little Nat that used to work on the pitch?" Rudolphus gaped in surprise.

"That's me." She smiled while secretly gritting her teeth.

"All grown up I see." His eyes settled on her chest and she was starting to wish she were skinny little Nat with no boobs again.

"Well, what is this?" She shrugged and tried to change the subject. "A Slytherin homecoming?"

"Of sorts. It's Lucius' stag night." He raised his glass in Lucius' general direction, as did a few others.

"Ah yes. Hello Lucius. I did read about your engagement in The Daily Prophet. Congratulations, though I'm not surprised."

"Thank you." He said without expression.

"Good Evening and welcome to World Cup Quidditch!" The Minister's voice bellowed across the night sky and the boys immediately settled into their seats to watch the match.

Natalia was only able to catch a few minutes of the Russian team's warm up before the demanding young men started ordering more drinks and food. It was shocking how much these young men could consume. They kept her running all night.

The crowd erupted with cheers when Igor zoomed out onto the pitch. The very sight of him gave Natalia a lump in her throat and "Knights in White Satin" replayed in her mind. She knew it was hopeless to carry such a silly fan girl kind of crush over this guy, but she could not help it. He was her fantasy.

Between the continuous stream of drink orders and trying to steal glances at Igor, Natalia failed to notice that Lucius never took his eyes off her. Quietly, he sat in a seat against the wall and observed her with a melancholy expression.

The well-manicured man with the somewhat waxy plastic quality to his skin, however, missed nothing. His eyes traveled back and forth between Lucius and this waitress before him, as he plotted. Lord Voldemort did not indulge in drink, requesting only spring water from Natalia. When she brought it to him, he grazed his hand against hers and she smiled sweetly back at him. A lamb to the slaughter was his immediate thought when he looked at her. Then his eyes found Lucius, sitting in the seat in front of him and watching her sadly. This outward display of weakness infuriated him. Lack of backbone could not be tolerated in his ranks, and so he decided to test the young man's mettle.

Lord Voldemort leaned forward to begin his torture of young Lucius. "Who is that young witch you've been watching all night?"

A large vein in Lucius' neck twitched which was not lost on the Dark Lord. "Natalia Smith." He gulped. "She was in Slytherin House with all of us. She will be a seventh year next month."

"Tight little arse on her, and, look at those legs. They go on forever." Voldemort hissed in his ear, while watching gooseflesh appear on his subject's neck. "Did you fuck her?"

"No, my Lord." His voice quivered.

"No? Horny little prick like you? I don't believe you." Voldemort leaned in further and stroked his wand against Lucius' temple. "Legilimens." Before Lucius knew it, all his seedy sexual encounters with Natalia were playing out in the Dark Lord's mind. When all of them had cycled through, the steamier ones were replayed, including the time in the Slytherin common room. When he finished reviewing them, Voldemort shifted in his seat. "Oooh Lucius, while I see you did not technically lie to me, you certainly left out some interesting details. Hand job in the Slytherin Common Room; that is quite thrilling. And she accepted your payments? Dirty little whore. I might like to give her a go myself, but I feel attractions only to more deserving, aristocratic witches."  
>Voldemort put his arm around Lucius and slithered closer to him. As always, he was sexually ambiguous, which generally served to make everyone, male and female, gay and straight, uncomfortable. "She doesn't seem to be particularly interested in you any longer." He hissed. "She seems very interested in the quidditch players, particularly the young phenom, Master Karkaroff. But really, who wouldn't be, a strapping young buck such as he? I even find him attractive."<p>

"Yes, they became friends when the Durmstrang students visited Hogwarts several years ago, my Lord."

"But how could she prefer him, to you? I understand his family is pure in blood, and he is quite admired by the ladies, however he is still from a rather barbaric part of the world. The Slavic bloodline is respectable, but it cannot compare with ours. We are by far, the superior race." Voldemort caressed Lucius shoulder seductively. Lucius remained as still as a stone. "If I were you, I wouldn't tolerate rejection from such a girl. You are miles above that immigrant scum. Who do these grimy gypsies think they are, coming to England and seducing our women? You will show her you're not going to put up with that. Teach her a lesson in humility she won't forget. Show her what a real wizard…feels like."

Lucius didn't respond but what little color he had in his cheeks vanished.

Voldemort snaked his hand down to Lucius' crotch as Lucius watched in horror. "Of course if you're not firm enough." He punctuated the word 'firm' with a quick squeeze of Lucius' balls. "I'll find someone else who could handle that for you."

"Thank you my Lord, but I will deal with Miss Smith. She will see the light when I'm through with her."

Voldemort's evil laugh vibrated against Lucius' ear. "Good. Do it tonight. I'll be watching."

"Watching?" Again Lucius gulped. "My Lord?"

"Yes." Voldemort leaned back and gave Lucius a quick pat on the shoulder. "Can't have you losing your nerve, my young friend."

As if on cue, Natalia interrupted them. "Can I get you gentleman something?"

Lucius turned away, unable to look her in the eye. Voldemort responded for both of them. "Spring water for me." He drawled. "Get our friend, Lucius, a very stout whiskey. Make it a double."

"As you wish." She smiled and went on her way, completely unaware of what was about to befall her.

As the match dragged on, Lucius consumed drink after drink, trying to dull the terror and pain within him. The last thing in the world he wanted to do was harm his sweet Natalia. He watched her with a fearful heart as she worked the room, keeping people well supplied with drinks and food. She worked so hard. She had hope for a better life. She was slow to trust, but now it seemed like she might finally be coming into her own. He knew with certainty he was about to destroy all of that. Several times he had to look away, unable to stand looking at his sweet girl. Why must he always be the one to hurt her? Why couldn't he be her knight in shining armor?

Several times he noticed Voldemort smirking in his general direction and was reminded why. If he didn't do what was requested of him, Voldemort might take her himself, worse yet he might drag her to the after party tent where she would be passed around from man to man. Even if Lucius did what he was told, there was still a chance of that. This terrified him more than anything.

He thought of telling her to run, but Voldemort would know, and punish them both. This was the only way. He gulped down an entire fire whiskey and immediately asked her to bring him another.

"That's your fourth, Lucius. Shouldn't you slow down? You know you'll feel horrible in the morning? Did you bring your draught?"

He looked longingly at her but couldn't speak.

Voldemort interrupted. "He doesn't need a draught. Lucius can handle his liquor like a man. Can't you, Lucius?"

"Y-yes."

Natalia shrugged and went back to refill a few beer steins.

"Not losing your nerve are you, Lucius?" The Dark Lord hissed.

"No my Lord."

Cheers suddenly erupted across the pitch as it was apparent that Igor caught the snitch and the Russians had won. The Slytherins all started exchanging money, as every one of them had placed a bet. Natalia raced to the front of the box just in time to see Igor taking a victory lap. As he passed by their box, he noticed her and slowed to a snail's pace. For a moment, there was recognition in his eyes, but then he bit his lip with a thoughtful expression, quite unable to place her. Just then his teammates flew slap into him and they all spiraled down to the ground, landing in a laughing, victorious heap.

Natalia sighed, thinking that between the win, the big tips and the brief connection with Igor, the night had gone as well as she could have hoped for. The box quickly began to clear out and she said goodbye to Regulus and Snape as she began to clean up the room. She was relieved to hear the door finally shut behind her and assumed she was alone.

Lucius looked one last time at Voldemort, hoping he had changed his mind, but the Dark Lord only nodded in Natalia's direction, and he knew what he had to do.  
>"You seem to have become a beautiful woman almost overnight, Natalia."<p>

She jumped and cast him a sidelong dirty look. "Not overnight. You just haven't been around." She huffed and did not notice that Voldemort was standing silent and motionless in the shadows by the door.

"Why so cold?" He stepped closer, desperately trying to be charming and hoping he wouldn't have to force her. "I'm quite a catch you know?"

"So I've heard, but I'm not fishing."

He leaned closer. "Not Russian enough for you?"

For a moment she stopped, surprised that he noticed her watching Igor and worried that others had as well. She decided there was no longer any point in denying it and wanted to make him mad anyway. "Not by a long shot."

"Still hung up on him? I always knew you were. Did you think about him when we were together?"

This conversation was degrading rapidly, making Natalia anxious. Desperately, she tried to change the subject. "How are things with Narcissa?"

He smirked. "Touché." He walked around her. "She spends money, hand over fist. It could be quite burdensome after we marry. I wish she were more interested in earning money like you are."

Diplomacy was not working, so she tired a direct approach. "Cut the shit, Lucius. What are you up to?" She turned away and began wiping the counter down. Lucius stood behind her and slipped an arm around her waist.

Lucius squared his shoulders, now ready for the struggle he'd hoped to avoid. There was no way out of this and so he put on his most ruthless persona and plunged forward. "Always direct. I love that about you." He pressed himself against her back, pinning her between the counter and his body. "I think you know what I'm up to."

"Take your hands off me," she hissed while going for her wand.

"Expelliarmus." He growled. "You should know better than to underestimate me, Natalia." Roughly he grabbed her breast as he began grinding his hips against her backside.

"Oh for Merlin's sake! Did you really have to disarm me?" She laughed nervously. "Haven't we always been able to reach a compromise in the past?" She turned slightly and put her hand on his semi-erect member. Better to do this on her terms than his.

Lucius knew she was scared or she wouldn't be giving an inch right now. He was scared too, but the Dark Lord was watching in the shadows and if she saw him, it would be even more perilous for her. "No compromises tonight witch." He grabbed her hand and bent it behind her back.

"Lucius, what the…"

"Shut the hell up." With his other hand, he grabbed her by the back of her neck and slammed her face down on the counter.

The force of her skull hitting the granite stunned her, nearly knocking her out. Besides a timid little whimper, she made no other move to struggle. Lucius took the opportunity to use a binding spell to secure her hands to the counter. He lifted her skirt and rubbed his hands over her buttocks, trying to arouse himself. If he thought too much about this he wouldn't be able to go through with it and then Voldemort might take over. The intense pressure and stress of the moment succeeded in arousing him as those factors always did. He vanished her knickers and then began to quickly undo his own trousers.

"Lucius, please don't," she cried piteously.

He bent over her, putting his full weight on her smaller form. His hair covered both their faces as he spoke. "Remain silent. Don't struggle. This will be over soon enough."

He forced himself inside her. As he suspected, there was momentary resistance as he pierced her virgin core, but with one more brutal thrust he was tightly sheathed inside her and she cried out in agony. The tightness and the heat were far more than he could have ever imagined and under different circumstances he would have enjoyed it. If only she weren't shaking and crying beneath him.

And that's how they lost their innocence.  
><em>AN:<em>_ I__hope__this__wasn__'__t__too__much__for__some__of__you.__ This__is__a__very__sharp__turn__for__the__worst__in__Natalia__'__s__life.__ I__do__want__to__be__clear__about__something.__ Sometimes__people__will__assume__that__because__an__author__writes__about__something,__they__condone__the__action.__ I__'__m__not__condoning__or__endorsing__bad__behavior__by__men__no__matter__the__circumstance.__ Nor__am__I__suggesting__that__Natalia__ "__asked__for__it__" __in__anyway.__ This__is__just__something__that__happened__to__the__character__that__she__now__has__to__find__a__way__to__deal__with.__ She__will__struggle__with__it__for__a__very__long__time.__ Lucius__will__also__struggle__for__that__matter.__ He__now__has__to__live__with__his__miserable__self. _  
><em>So,<em>_I__suspect__some__of__you__may__be__turned__off__by__this__twist,__and__I__understand.__ However,__I__hope__you__will__stick__with__Natalia__as__she__will__try__to__go__forward__after__this__tragedy.__ I__'__ve__always__admired__people__who__can__experience__profound__loss__and__then__find__a__way__to__go__forward.__ I__think__that__is__worth__exploring__and__hope__you__do__too._


	16. Chapter 16 Landslide

CHAPTER SIXTEEN

Lanslide

When the assault was over, Natalia lay splayed across the table, her body trembling with frantic sobs, while Lucius, sweating like a pig, collapsed on top of her. Once more, the Dark Lord's words forced entry into his mind, "Impressive Lucius. I'll see you in the after party tent. Oh, and don't do anything gentlemanly or cowardly, like obliviating her memory. I want her to remember this, to fear you, to fear us. Let her perpetuate our legend and feed the fear." And with that, he swept out of the box.

Lucius pulled his arms tightly around Natalia, who was still wailing uncontrollably. "Natalia, I'm so sorry. Sweet girl. Sweet girl." He was now sobbing with her. "I'm so sorry. Please forgive me. Please, please forgive me, my darling."

She wanted to tell him to go to hell, but she was going into shock, freezing and not thinking clearly. It was as if her soul was shutting down and nothing was registering except the disturbing grate of his voice.

"Merlin, I love you. I'm so sorry. My sweet girl." He kissed her cheek and something wet, dribbled down on her face. "Sweet girl. Please forgive me."

Her mind was spinning in vertigo and she couldn't understand why he kept saying that. It was completely disconnected from the torture he just inflicted on her. An overwhelming need to vomit suddenly gripped her, but she was too terrified move and swallowed her own bile.

"Sweet girl, I'm so sorry. I didn't want to hurt you."

Again, he said those words, sounding more macabre by the moment. Her urge to tell him to go to hell was enormous. She felt it rising within her and screamed it. But all that came out was a barely audible, "Go."

Lucius hesitated for a moment. Then cleared his throat and raised himself off her. "Yes, of course. I'll just be going." His tone changed abruptly, now so light and lilting that he might have been saying good-bye after Sunday Brunch. As she lay there sobbing quietly, she could hear the zipper fastening on his pants and the clink of his belt buckle as he hastily made himself presentable. Then, without another word, she heard the door open and shut, and she was alone.

Natalia's eyes darted nervously around the room, out the window to the now empty quidditch pitch and stands, to the stack of glasses near the sink, to the ugly florescent light hanging from the ceiling, and then to her wand, laying on the floor. Frantically, she tried to get a grasp on what had just happened to her, but quickly had to push it out of her mind. She couldn't think about it now. All she wanted to think about was getting out of there and home to the safety of her room above The Three Broomsticks. She had to meet Mme Rosmerta very soon, in order to catch the port key home. Her mind switched irrationally to the list of tasks she must accomplish and their proper order so that she may reach her goal of getting back to her room.

_Make yourself presentable. Tidy the room. Put on your coat. Get your bag. Leave the room. Exit the stadium. Cross the field. Reach the port key. Tell no one. _

Tremors shook every part of her body as she repeated the steps over and over, like a prayer in an effort to gain focus and calm down.

_Make yourself presentable. Tidy the room. Put on your coat. Get your bag. Leave the room. Exit the stadium. Cross the field. Reach the port key. Tell no one_

Although Rosmerta wanted her to do tasks manually, Natalia made the decision to act expeditiously. Still whimpering, she straightened herself up and pulled down her skirt. She looked about for her underwear, but then remembered Lucius had vanished her knickers. His foul seed was running down her leg and she quickly turned to make her way to the loo. Pain seized her as she took her first step, the after effects of his violent assault.

_Make__yourself__presentable._ She hobbled to the loo, and without dwelling on it, cleaned herself up. Then she stood over the sink, and splashed icy cold water on her face. It was then that she caught sight of her reflection and it shocked her. Her long hair was askew, tousled, her makeup was smeared, and her blouse now seemed cut a little too low. It frightened her, and she quickly scurried from the room, only to be terrified anew when she was back in the skybox.

Was anyone there? Where was everyone? Was she alone? All these thoughts raced erratically though her mind as her eyes darted about. Her wand was on the floor. She dove on it and picked it up, grasping it like a lifeline, pointing it about the room. Then she remembered she was alone. She was cracking up. She had to get out of there.

Her work however was not done. _Tidy__the__room_. It had to be done or someone would ask why it wasn't. She could not disappoint Rosmerta. She used magic to clean the glasses and put them away. She straightened the chairs. She bewitched a broom to start the sweeping. It was almost done when she saw the counter. It was still dirty and her rag was laying on it, right where she had dropped it before Lucius…no, she couldn't think about it. She shook her head to clear it. With a violent wave of her wand, the counter was cleaned.

_Put__on__your__coat.__ Get__your__bag_. She repeated the next steps out loud to propel her forward. She was closer to leaving this awful place and its memories behind.  
><em>Leave<em>_the__room._ The stands were deserted and so quiet now that she could hear her shoes clomping loudly as she walked down the stairs to the exit. As she was about to enter the large vestibule, and walk through the surrounding celebration, she spied Igor Karkaroff, still in quidditch robes and the embodiment of perfection. He was chatting with an older couple, and surrounded by several others, close to his own age. They were all dressed in the most expensive robes she'd ever seen, and all had the dark good looks of Igor. It was his family. An upstanding family who loved him, surrounded him. The older man was obviously his father and he patted his son heartily on the back, while offering praise in Russian. Igor smiled sheepishly under his father's compliments.

_Exit__the__stadium_. She repeated the next step to herself, but for some reason was unable to pass by these people in her current state. Her appearance was surely shameful. People could certainly tell what had happened just by looking at her. Certainly they could.

"Sasha!" Igor called out. From out of nowhere, Sasha Malfoy ran to his arms and jumped in. He laughed and swung her around. Natalia watched with a vacant feeling inside.

"Igor, you were marvelous!" Sasha squealed. "I mean that catch at the end was unreal!"

"It was nothing." He laughed. Natalia watched as he closed his eyes, buried his face in her hair and inhaled deeply. When he opened his eyes again, something like disappointment crossed his face and he set Sasha back down on her feet. He hesitated for a moment before his manners came back to him. "You remember my mother and father."

"Yes, of course." Sasha gushed. "It's lovely to see you, Mr. and Mrs. Karkaroff."  
>Mr. Karkaroff bowed. "And how is your family, Sasha? I hear your brother is celebrating his engagement to Miss Black."<p>

"Yes. Isn't it wonderful? We are so very happy for him."

"Will you join us for dinner at the quidditch club tent?" Mr. Karkaroff extended the invitation. From the looks on the faces of the others, this was a rare stamp of approval.

Sasha looked back at Igor. "I'd love too, but please, don't let me intrude."  
>"Heavens no, my dear." Mr. Karkaroff insisted. "How could a such a lovely young lady ever be an intrusion? Come along now."<p>

The group walked away toward the elaborate quidditch club tent. Igor's arm was draped carelessly over Sasha's shoulder and he leaned over to whisper something in her ear. She laughed loudly at whatever remark he made, which was presumably the desired result.

Silently, Natalia cried as she watched this picture of all that was beautiful in a wizarding family fade away. How could she have ever been so foolish as to assume she could ever be a part of something so wholesome? She was unloved, abused, abandoned, and tainted rubbish. Never could she be deserving enough to belong to such a family and she was a fool to ever thing so.

_Exit__the__stadium!__ Exit__the__stadium!_ She had to get out of there or she would lose her mind. She put her head down and darted through the crowd of people and out the door.

_Cross__the__field.__ Reach__the__port__key._ She was almost there. If she could only get to the port key on time, this nightmare would be over. Once away from the pitch, she ran across a field where she saw Rosmerta and a few others, gathered around an old tractor. "Hurry Natalia!" She called out.

_Cross__the__field.__ Reach__the__port__key._ Natalia ran as quickly as she could, wincing through pain, and when she reached the tractor, she nearly fell upon it.  
><em>Tell<em>_no__one_. When the staff finally returned to The Three Broomsticks, they all wanted to gather together around the bar, share some drinks and tell amusing stories from their night. Natalia couldn't stand to be around anyone, and would certainly never tell another living soul what had happened to her. All she wanted was to take a very long scalding hot shower, go to sleep, and forget this entire evening ever happened. She slipped away from the group after making plausible excuses to Rosmerta.  
>Once in the shower, she stood for nearly half an hour under the hot water, scrubbing every inch of her body with a vengeance. It seemed no matter how hard she scrubbed or how hot the water, she couldn't get clean enough. Could she ever feel clean again after what happened? In that moment, she did not think she could. Her tears were unstoppable and between that, and the heat of the water, she soon found herself light headed from dehydration.<p>

Reluctantly, she turned off the shower and wrapped herself in a towel. She hobbled over to the sink and turned on icy cold water and began to drink handfuls, then she splashed it repeatedly on her face in an attempt to stabilize herself. Obsessively, she continued to douse herself until her lips began to turn blue and she started to shiver. Finally, she raised her face to the mirror and was once again horrified by her reflection.  
>Her shaped eyebrows, her long hair, her ridiculous traces of makeup that still clung to her skin, all disgusted her now. She was ashamed of herself for being so stupid and trying to attract the attention of men. Look what it had gotten her. Rage suddenly gripped her and she felt the need to exact violence on someone or something. As if possessed, she ripped open the drawer to the cabinet and reached for a very large pair of sewing scissors. Then she grabbed a fistful of her now hated hair and hacked off a six-inch length. It felt good to do something proactive. Men would not look at her again if she looked like she used to. She grabbed another fistful and hacked off another hunk, this time around eight inches. Grunting with anger, she continued this process until piles of raven tresses littered the room. She looked at herself again, with her jagged, uneven, barbaric looking hair and was now sickened. Truly, she was unlovable. She would never deserve the love and adoration she saw Igor shower upon Sasha in the stadium tonight. No, this was her lot, abuse and perversion at the hands of the upper classes. She was not worth the admiration of decent people. That must have been why her parents abandoned her. She was doomed to this prison, and deserved no better. The room began to spin around her but her hideous reflection remained, snarling back at her from the mirror. Finally, she could stand the sight of herself no more and punched the mirror as hard as she could. The last things she saw were shattering glass and a frightening amount of blood before she blacked out.<p>

_AN:__ Thanks for coming back:) Poor __Natalia.__ She __needs __the __support __of __good __friends __right __now.__ Let__'__s __hope __she __can __let __them __in to __her __life.__ What __do __you __think __Igor __would __do __if __he __knew __about __this?_  
><em>Thank <em>_you __for __your __reviews __and __also __to __those __of __you __who __have __favorited __or __have __the __story __on __alerts.__ I __look __forward __to __hearing __your __thoughts __every__day!_

_Hope you are all loving this fall weather if you are on the east coast of the US. We are having a bonfire tonight. Hope those Durmstrang boys show up:)_


	17. Chapter 17 The Fool On The Hill

CHAPTER SEVENTEEN

The Fool On The Hill

Hours later, Natalia found herself easing into consciousness, but still lost in the thick fog of her trauma. The first thing she became aware of was pain. Her right hand stung, burned, and throbbed; the result of her fist shattering the mirror. Then she felt the dull ache of the bruises around her backside and groin, all the horrific recollections drifted back into her mind. She did not open her eyes nor move; for her limbs were heavy and she felt dazed. The entire moment was surreal.

"And you don't have any idea how she got this way?" The gentle voice of her Headmaster, Albus Dumbledore, was the first sound she heard. She exhaled slowly, with relief, knowing that she was finally safe. No one could harm her now.

"No. It was very strange." Rosmerta replied in hushed, urgent tones. "When we returned from World Cup, she went right upstairs. I assumed she was tired and thought nothing of it. Then I heard this terrible crash and thumping sound. I ran upstairs thinking she had fallen and when I did, I found her on the bathroom floor, with blood, hair and glass strewn about everywhere. It was the most bizarre thing I'd ever seen."

"Did she say anything about her evening?" Dumbledore inquired with clinical calm. "Did something happen to her?" Natalia went rigid. She simply could not tolerate the humiliation if they knew.

"Obviously something happened to her." Rosmerta hissed. "Why would anyone in their right mind give themselves this haircut0?"

"Why didn't you take her to St. Mungos?" Again, Dumbledore's voice remained calm, almost monotone.

"Those nosey bastards? I wouldn't subject her to that. Her physical injuries were manageable. It's her mind I'm worried about. Natalia has never been prone to such erratic behavior."

"Have you tried to rouse her?"

"Not since I first found her. When she wouldn't come around, I decided to let her rest."

"Probably best. Who rented the box she was working tonight?"

"I don't know. Some rich bloke I assume. It was under the name Marvolo. I've never heard of him."

"Did you meet him?"

"No."

"Did you alert the orphanage?"

"No. Other than her injuries, which I don't want to explain, there's nothing more to tell."

Natalia listened to them conversing about her like she was not in the room. She feigned sleep, wanting to avoid questions until she could wrap her mind around what happened, and concoct some plausible lies. For a moment, she thought it might have been some horrible dream, but as the nightmare came flooding back, she knew it was not. It had all happened to her and there was no escaping it now. The attack, the pain, and the humiliation were all a permanent part of her past.

"Sweet girl." Lucius' twisted laments in the aftermath came flooding back. If she was so sweet, how could he have done this to her? How could he brutalize her, humiliate her and take the only thing that was hers, from her? To think that she would have given it to him freely, if he had only asked, if only he wouldn't have been so ashamed of her. All he had to do was embrace her for who she was.

Of course he was ashamed. Look at what she'd become. It was too much to swallow. In fact, it was completely unacceptable to Natalia. She would not accept it. She would absolutely refuse to accept it. To accept it would change her life forever and she was just starting to get on the right track with her life. In order to go on with her life the way she wanted, she could never acknowledge what happened. Her only choice was to tuck it away and forget it.

Natalia continued to pretend to be asleep until Dumbledore and Rosmerta left her. Then she really tired to sleep, but could not. She raised herself up to a sitting position and waited for stability to come back to her before she stood. Her legs felt weak under her as she hobbled to the bathroom. Slowly, she lowered herself onto the toilet to relieve herself and then winced sharply as pain gripped her nether regions, a direct result of Lucius' assault. She took long deep breaths and gritted her teeth just trying to get through the simple act of relieving herself. However, she refused to whine or cry about it. When she stood, she looked at her reflection in the repaired mirror. She looked about the room and if she hadn't heard Rosmerta talking about the mess, she might have thought she dreamed it. The room was now spotless, a product of Rosmerta's fastidious housekeeping.

Natalia's hair was jagged and nearly ruined. She narrowed her eyes considering what to do about it. Finally, she sighed and picked up the scissors, still on the counter and began a more surgical approach of trying to make herself presentable and camouflage her recent past. If she presented herself properly, no one need ever know that she was ruined.

She went back to bed and pulled the covers over her head. She spent the rest of the night and most of the following day, taking a succession of naps, but never really getting a restful sleep. Sometime after the dinner hour, Rosmerta entered the room with a tray of soup and some bread. Natalia blinked the sleep out of her eyes.

"Excellent, you're awake." Rosmerta said softly, almost cautiously. "Time to eat a little."

Natalia was hungry and eased herself to a sitting position so Rosmerta could set the tray on her lap. She took a spoonful of soup as Rosmerta watched.

"Are you going to tell me what happened?"

Natalia had utilized her time that day to concoct her story and was ready for her. "I was tired…at little lightheaded. I think I passed out."

"And the broken mirror?"

"I must have fallen into it."

"If that were the case, you would have a cut on your face. You did not. Your right hand however, is shredded. This leaves me to believe you struck the mirror on purpose." Rosmerta was no fool and Natalia knew she would be hard to hide anything from.

"I told you I don't remember." She replied flatly.

But Rosmerta persisted. "Tell me about your evening."

"There's not much to tell." Natalia took another spoonful of soup and shrugged for effect. " Just a night of serving drinks. Same as always."

"Anyone you know in the sky box?"

"No." Natalia lied. She knew nearly everyone in that box.

"What about this Marvolo that rented the box for his party?"

Finally, a question she could answer truthfully. "I didn't meet anyone named Marvalo."

"Who did you meet?" Rosmerta's questions were relentless.

"I told you I didn't know anyone. Just a bunch of wizards enjoying quidditch." Natalia shrugged.

Rosmerta sighed heavily and clasped her hands in her lap. "Natalia, do you think I'm stupid?"

"S-sorry?" When in doubt it was always good to answer a question with another question. At the very least, one could utilize this tactic to stall.

"When I found you on the floor of the bathroom you were naked. You have contusions all over your backside and abrasions all over both wrists."

"Oh," Natalia shrugged and tried to keep her voice light. "The room was rather crowded. I bumped into the counter a couple times and…"

"You were raped."

The word shocked Natalia into silence. She had not even allowed her mind to consider the word. Rape was something that happened to other people, to girls who were not careful, not to people like her.

"Oh darling. Do you think you're the only person this has ever happened to?" Rosmerta's kind eyes pleaded for the truth. "You have nothing to be ashamed of you know."

Natalia did not know that. It was not part of her reality. She blamed herself for what happened and was mortified that someone might know her horrible secret. Deny, deny, deny, was all she could do.

"Who was it?"

Natalia remained silent, staring straight ahead.

"The authorities have to be notified." Rosmerta insisted.

Silence.

"Why would you protect someone who did this to you?" Rosmerta stood and paced across the room.

It wasn't Lucius she was protecting. This was about self-preservation, but she could not share this with Rosmerta. "You have it all wrong, Mme Rosmerta."

"All right then." Rosmerta turned to face her with a piteous expression. "You keep this to yourself for now. But I warn you, that's not healthy. If you want to get past this, you have to acknowledge that it happened. Trust me, I know."

Natalia locked eyes with her.

"It was a very long time ago. It took years, but I've recovered. It isn't easy though. Darling, please tell me what happened."

Again Natalia sat in silence.

"All right dear. But when you're ready, I'm here for you." She kissed Natalia on the forehead, took the tray and set it on her nightstand, and pulled the covers up to tuck her in.

Despite Rosmerta's prying questions and Dumbledore's careful observation, Natalia was able to keep her nightmare undercover for the next few weeks before school started. She managed to shape her hair into a short, spiky cut that would pass for avant-garde and edgy. She threw herself back into work at The Three Broomsticks and anytime Rosmerta asked, she repeated that she had had a few drinks in the skybox and decided to cut her hair when she got home. When it didn't turn out right, she got angry and punched the mirror and when she saw the blood, she passed out. It was a technically plausible story. And even though Rosmerta obviously knew better, she did not press, and Natalia was left in peace.

She returned to her normal activities, internally damaged, but externally productive. What choice did she have? She couldn't tell anyone what happened. No court in the land would convict Lucius Malfoy on the word of a waitress. So she pretended nothing was wrong and hoped that she could eventually forget.

On the first day back at Hogwarts, she knew right away this year would not be as peaceful as the prior year. Severus was aloof, barely speaking to anyone except his little group of friends that people started referring to as a gang of Slytherins. The girl talk from the girls in her dorm grated sharply on her nerves after all that had happened to her. Sasha Malfoy was friendly as always, but seeing her reminded Natalia of Lucius and Igor, so she avoided her like the plague.

After the sorting ceremony, Dumbldore announced that he had a surprise for everyone. Considering all the divisive talk regarding magical purity, the Ministry had decided to encourage magical cooperation among its youth, and so, although it was early, Hogwarts would once again be hosting the Tri-Wizard Tournament. The students erupted into cheers and Natalia barely had time to process it all before the Proud Sons of Durmstrang were marching down the center aisle of The Great Hall.

She watched their impressive entrance, frantically scanning each face for Igor. She was about to think he had left school a year early, perhaps to continue his quidditch career, when finally she saw him. He swaggered in last, most certainly a place of honor, flanked by Headmaster Oblonsky and his friend Levin. Charisma oozed from every fiber of him and his eyes devilishly swept the room, taking in the female students of Hogwarts.

He'd grown taller and his shoulders were broader. His dark hair was now a little longer and cascaded over his shoulders in graceful waves. His beard was a little thicker, longer than a scruff, but not a full beard, though it did seem to indicate strong genetics. Did his eyes get darker? Were his lips fuller? Or had Natalia just forgotten how beautiful he was. He sat near the front of the room and leaned back in his chair with an air of confidence. His friend Levin sat next to him. He had also filled out a bit, but still kept the boyish face she remembered. He leaned over to Igor and whispered something while nodding in the direction of the Gryffindor table. Igor smirked and stifled a laugh. Natalia knew they must have been talking about someone of the female persuasion.

Seeing him again should have made her happy, but not today. She felt spent, disgusting and sick. It was no fun seeing him, knowing that if he knew who she really was, he would be appalled. So over the first few weeks of his stay, she avoided him. She also tiptoed around any situation that might put them in close proximity. So determined was she not to see him, that on the evening of the selection of champions for the Tri-Wizard cup, she volunteered to work in the infirmary so Poppy could be present in the Great Hall.

Her schedule was surprisingly exhausting this year and she was nearly sleepwalking through her shift. The infirmary was quiet that night with only a few students in residence who had only minor injuries. Natalia couldn't find much to occupy her time and so she decided to take a ten-minute break and sit by the window. The moon was shining on the Black Lake and she could see the silhouette of Igor's ship. It was a serene looking picture. She leaned against the stone wall, and before she knew it, she had nodded off.

She wasn't sure how long she was asleep, but awoke to find Severus shaking her shoulders. "Wake up!" He snapped. "What's the matter with you. You're the least lazy person I know, if you're laying down on the job, I have no more faith in humanity." He was obviously furious about something, and Natalia knew immediately it wasn't because she fallen asleep on the job.

"Oh, Severus, what time is it?"

"Ten thirty. You've missed lights out and I've been waiting in the common room for you all night." He sounded like Flitwick clucking around her like a wet hen.

"Ten thirty? Merlin's Beard, let's get out of here." She blinked the sleep out of her eyes as she stood and followed Severus out of the infirmary. He stalked ahead of her and she had trouble keeping pace. "Slow down, Severus. What's got your wand in a knot?"

"It chose HIM!" Severus whirled around on her, eyes ablaze. His fists were balled up and a vein was sticking out on his temple.

Natalia tired to remain calm, and get to the heart of what was disturbing him. She spoke very slowly with a soft voice. "What chose whom?"

"The Goblet of Fire, it chose him!" He growled back.

"Okay, well that answers the what part of my question. Now tell me the who."

"Potter!" Severus spat the name out like it had a bad taste. Natalia thought that more than likely, it did.

"Potter?"

"Yes."

"A tri-wizard champion?"

"Have you ever heard of anything so preposterous?"

"Well, I can think of a few others I might have picked first but, honestly, I could see that."

This put Severus over the edge. "He's a moron!"

"He bests you at least once a week." Natalia shocked herself in saying that. It was a horrible thing to say to her friend. She had no idea what had come over her. It was like the filter between her brain and mouth was gone.

Severus shoulders seemed to pinch themselves towards his neck as he struggled not to explode.

"Severus, I didn't mean that." She struggled for an excuse, "I'm still a bit groggy."

"No, I suppose your right." He hissed. "In addition to far better packaging and speed, he has the ability. If you could have seen him though, strutting around like a bloody peacock while all his disciples cheered. And Lily, the look on her face was…saccharine. It was disgusting. Why weren't you there?"

"I told you I had to work. Who else did they choose?"

"Karkaroff."

Natalia's heart swelled. Igor, a Tri-Wizard Champion, she was thrilled for him. He would surely win. For the first time, in a long time she was looking forward to something. Watching Igor compete would be the highlight of her year. She smiled to herself for sometime before she remembered Severus. "Well, he'll certainly thrash Potter, so no worries there. What about Beauxbatons?"

"Fifi Lafayette."

Natalia's face pinched at hearing such a horrible name. "Who?"

"I have no idea who she is."

"Sounds like a stripper."

"Looks like one too, blonde, too much makeup, huge…"Severus made a gesture to indicate breasts, "tracks of land." Natalia giggled at his reference. "You should have seen Karkaroff and Potter drooling. Disgusting."

For a time, Natalia was successful at continuing to avoid Igor, but that all came to an end a few days after the champions were chosen, when she was working a Saturday shift at The Three Broomsticks. She had been washing dishes in the back when Rosmerta ordered her to go help the wait staff, who were dealing with a bombardment of student patrons. She couldn't miss the large table of eight Durmstrang students in their red robes, in the corner of the pub, nearest the dartboard. They were sitting next to a table of Slytherin boys and bantering back and forth. Natalia stayed away from them and started working at the other side of the room. Soon however, she could not overlook Igor's booming voice, amplified with alcohol from across the room.

"Ohhhh? Are we going to talk about mothers?" Igor chortled, ready to challenge Regulus. "I remember your mother, Mrs. Black, well. Yes, she is so nasty, even a house elf wouldn't take her sock." The Durmstrang boys laughed and high-fived each other.

"Really?" Regulus raised an eyebrow. " I seem to recall meeting Mrs. Karkaroff recently. Lovely woman however, she is so fat, the sorting hat put her in the International House of Pancakes." The Slytherin table erupted as did most of the Durmstrang table who didn't take this little amusement too seriously.

"Your mother," Igor was now leaning back in his chair and pointing at a snickering Regulus, "the unfortunate Mrs. Black, is so ugly, she walked into Gringott's and they gave her a job!" Igor's face lit up as he laughed at his own joke and looked around the room at his audience.

"Your mother is so ugly," Regulus retorted without missing a beat, "when she was born, the doctor screamed "riddikulus!""

Igor laughed but stood up for his next comment. "May I have your attention please?" He raised his glass and tapped on it with a fork. "Raise your glass to Mrs. Black, the mother of Regulus, who is so old, she lifted up her boob and Merlin fell out."

Both tables exploded with laughter and applause, and some of the boys were so hysterical they collapsed on each other, holding their sides or pounding the table. Even Regulus laughed and bowed in mock submission to Igor, the clear winner.

Natalia didn't see the humor in it at all. In fact, since World Cup she hadn't seen the humor in anything. She had no mother and was disgusted by their obnoxious jokes against their closest family members who must love them dearly. However, she knew from experience that inebriated young male wizards were difficult to handle and not to be tested, so she tried to move by their table unnoticed. As she passed by, Igor grabbed her roughly, starling her. . "Another round for both tables. Firewhiskey, except for Regulus. He has to go see his mother at Gringotts."

Natalia jerked away from him and went off to get their order from the bartender. She was fuming after hearing his absurd jokes and being grabbed like she was his slave girl. When she returned to the table with his order and set the drinks down, she scowled and did not look at him. Igor, obnoxiously tried to insert himself into her line of vision, moving his face in her way repeatedly when she continued to try to avoid him. This brought snickers from a couple boys seated near him.

"Halloo." He said deepening his voice for affect.

Natalia ignored him. He got up and sat down on the edge of the table she was about to serve and crossed his arms.

"You know, I have a tattoo."

"Charming." She stepped around him and moved to the other end of the table. He followed, getting in her way once again.

"Want to know where?"

She raised her eyebrows and gave him an obviously fake smile. "No."

He bit his lip and eyed her up and down. "Right on my bum."

She rolled her eyes at his impudence, and moved to the next table, but he kept following her.

"The letter M on each cheek." He paused for effect. "It spells Mom." He giggled and waited for a reaction. Natalia made none, but continued to work while wondering what it was that she saw in him to begin with. He kept trying to make her laugh though. "If you turn me upside down," he raised both eyebrows, "it says WOW!" He slapped his knee and roared with laughter.

Nataila straightened, but remained in stony silence. How dare he think he could speak to her like this? She was sick to death of these cocky assholes that treated women like this. He was as bad as Lucius. There would be no slack for him. She desperately hoped she could hold him to a higher standard.

"Tell me Mr. Karkaroff, does that line work in your country?" His giggling came to an abrupt halt and his cohorts also became quiet, while all eyes were on Natalia. "I'm thinking it must be the reason the muggles built the Berlin Wall. To keep the women from escaping."

"Oooohhhh!" The Drumstrang boys groaned and catcalls erupted. "Burn!" They were having a great time seeing him put in his place.

She expected this to make him angry but his eyes softened and he smiled at her. He didn't speak but seemed to be appraising her. He sighed and a new look of determination crossed his face. "You know, most women find me quite charming."

"Phfft! Well, there's no accounting for taste." She pushed past him and picked up some empty mugs to return to the kitchen. He followed her and got in her way again. She gritted her teeth. "You really are full of yourself aren't you?"

"Perhaps you would prefer it if….you…were full of me." He grinned lecherously at her. Natalia was entirely disgusted.

Catcalls and yelps exploded form the rowdy boys, and Igor too snickered with a self-satisfied smirk. His expression however quickly dissolved into one of a meek young man as he was eye to eye with Natalia's icy glare. His entourage noticed and was also silenced, save a few who whispered and elbowed one another as they watched with eager anticipation to see what was about to happen.

Natalia looked deep into his dark chocolate eyes while she bit down on the insides of her cheeks. It was all she could do to steady her jaw. She wondered how she could have misjudged his character. She was angry with herself for being such a poor judge of men. A need for violence engulfed her and she took the pitcher of butter beer on a nearby table and threw it in his face. "Mudilo!" she shouted, the only Russian curse word she remembered from the last time Durmstrang was here, before turning on her heel and stalking into the safety of the kitchen.

She walked to the enormous kitchen sink and cast several spells to begin washing and drying a passel of mugs and dishes. Her face was red and her hands were shaking. She concentrated very hard on what she was doing, lest she break something. Rosmerta always took the cost of replacements out of their wages.

Rosmerta entered the kitchen not long after her, and approached Natalia tentatively. "Are you all right, love?"

"Yes." Natalia sniffed and wiped the mist forming around her eyes. "Just a bunch of dumb quidditch jocks, nothing I can't handle." The catch in her voice told Rosmerta otherwise. She proceeded with her young friend, cautious but direct.

"Is he the one that…"

"The one that what?" Natalia cut her off with a look and tone of utter defiance.

"Did you see him at World Cup?"

"Only on the pitch, when he was playing." Natalia turned her focus back to the dishes, wanting to be done with this conversation as quickly as possible.

"Well, he's acting like a bastard. I'm going to speak with his Headmaster."

"No, no. I'm fine, really." Natalia grabbed her hand and pleaded with her. "That would only make it worse. Please just let it go."

When Natalia threw the butter beer in Igor's face the boys broke into cheers and laughter, accompanied by a smattering of applause. Levin tossed a handkerchief at his friend, then doubled over again, holding his sides. Igor wiped his face and shook the butter beer out of his hair, while scowling. He had never had a woman embarrass him like that and was quite certain he would never forget it.

Regulus walked over and slapped him on the back. "Nice work, Cassanova. Did your mother teach you those manners?"

Igor glowered at him, unaccustomed to being shut down in such a manner.

Regulus responded to his stare with a snort. "I should have warned you not to trifle with Slytherin girls."

"She's in Slytherin?" Igor suddenly wanted to know more about this girl who refused to put up with his shenanigans.

"Yes. Don't you remember her? Merlin, I used to swear you had a thing for her."

Igor looked puzzled.

"Natalia. You know, from the pitch."

Igor's eyes widened. It couldn't be so. "THAT was Nat from the pitch?"

"Yes, but I believe she prefers Natalia." Regulus watched him carefully to gauge his reaction.

Levin jumped in. "Oh yeah. You DID have a thing for her."

"I did not!" Igor hissed.

Levin made a mocking expression, and raised his eyebrows at Regulus, who was stifling a grin.

"That can't be the same girl." Igor waved his hand in the general direction of the kitchen. "Natalia was skin and bones, and timid as a mouse."

"Well, she's not skinny now." Levin interjected.

"No indeed." Regulus echoed. "You can't tell by that loose dress she's wearing today but I saw her over the summer and let me tell you, she's built like a brick shithouse."

Igor narrowed his eyes and used his wand to dry his coat. He didn't know who he was angrier with, himself for being an idiot, or Regulus for making a crass remark about Natalia.

Levin piled on. "She was really nice to you when we were here last."

Igor sighed, his lower lip protruding. "She was at that."

"What was that she yelled at you?" Regulus asked.

"She called me a motherfucker, in my own tongue no less." Igor looked down and began wringing the butter beer out of Levin's handkerchief.

"She must think you're an arse now." Levin snickered and seemed to enjoy Igor getting a dose of some well-deserved medicine. .

Igor squinted and pinched the bridge of this nose. "I am an arse." Guilt overwhelmed him for speaking to such a kind and hardworking girl in such a vulgar manner. He immediately rose and marched across the room to go apologize. He had one hand on the kitchen door to push it open when Rosmerta stopped him.

"Where do you think you're going?"

"I have to see Natalia."

"Not on my time, boy. She's working."

"Please, I have to apologize."

"You'll do that on your time." Rosmerta's tone was angry. "You've caused enough trouble today. I want you and your idiot friends out of here now."

"But…"

"I've heard enough about your butt today, Mr. Karkaroff. Don't make me speak to your Headmaster." Rosmerta left him to go on about her business of shooing the other boys out of the pub. They were all a little afraid of her and obeyed quickly. All of them knew too well that she could be a good friend or a terrible enemy. The Three Broomsticks was the most happening place in town on the weekend, and no one wanted to be barred from coming back. Igor, however, pulled a chair up, next to the kitchen door, plopped down and stubbornly refused to leave. After Rosmerta had gotten rid of the other boys, she returned to him. "You heard me. Out!" She ordered him while pointing to the door.

"No." He responded haughtily and crossed his arms. "Not until I speak with Natalia."

"She doesn't want to speak with you. She thinks you're shit."

"All the same, I want to apologize and I'll wait here until I get the opportunity. Don't worry, I'll give you no trouble." He set his jaw and looked away from her.

Rosmerta grinned but only because he wasn't looking. "Fine. You may stay, but one toe out of line and you won't be showing your face around here for the rest of the year." Rosmerta went back into the kitchen and on about her business. It was about an hour to closing time, and other than Igor, there were only two other patrons sitting at the bar. She watched Natalia, always masterfully efficient in the kitchen, complete two hours of work in one hour

"All done." Natalia said proudly when she was finished. "Is it all right if I go back to the castle? I have an exam tomorrow."

"Sure." Rosemerta agreed, knowing Natalia must still be rattled, for she had never asked to leave early before. "You know he's been sitting outside the kitchen door for the last hour, waiting to apologize."

Natalia sniffed while putting on her coat. "He has?"

"Yes. He's not all bad, just mouthy and a bit proud of himself. I told him to leave and he refused, until he spoke with you. Why don't you go talk to him?"

Natalia considered it, but not for long. "No." She shook her head adamantly. "I think it's better if I just stay away from him. He's trouble. Thank you, Mme Rosemerta." Natalia grabbed her bag and slipped out the back door.

Rosmerta walked back out into the pub. Igor turned hopefully in her direction, then slouched back in his chair when he realized it was not Natalia. Rosmerta stood directly in front of him and crossed her arms, and glared down at him.

"Mr. Karkaroff, I am going to give you a gift." She looked down her nose at him.

Igor gulped, unsure of what was coming next. He was quite sure he would not be receiving a present from this woman who clearly hated him.

"I am giving you this gift ONLY because you look utterly pathetic, and I feel sorry for you."

Igor stared blankly at her.

"Natalia left out the back door. If you hurry, you can catch her."

"Thank you!" Igor jumped up and gave her a quick peck on the cheek. "I owe you one!" He shouted over his shoulder as he ran out the door.

"That you do." Rosmerta put a hand to her cheek and wondered if Natalia would ever know how good he smelled.

Natalia, stepped out into the back alley to begin the long walk home. The sun was setting and a chill was in the breeze. She turned up the collar on her thin jacket and put her head down as she walked. Normally the streets were deserted at this time of the evening, so she was surprised when she bumped into someone. She was even more surprised when she looked up and into the deep coffee-colored eyes of Igor.

"Hallo." He said softly with all traces of the rowdy bar rat gone from his demeanor.

Despite his obvious effort, Natalia was not in the mood to be gracious. "What are you doing out at this hour? Did the tattoo parlors close early?", she quipped.

"Very funny." He shuffled his feet and looked down at the ground. "I don't really have a tattoo."

"I don't give a shit. Excuse me." She tried to side step around him, still annoyed after his earlier behavior.

He grabbed her arm. "I'm sorry Natalia." He blurted his feelings out like the clumsy teenager he was.

To be touched, even by him was unbearable and she instinctively jerked out of his grasp. "Leave me alone!"

His eyes widened in surprise at her reaction, and he immediately released her and put both hands up to his shoulders, palms out in surrender. However, he did not stop pleading with her." Please don't stay angry. I didn't know it was you."

"Didn't know it was me?", she shouted. "What difference does that make? Is that how you treat perfect strangers? Would you even be apologizing if it wasn't me?"

Igor thought about her question while she waited for his answer. Truthfully he would not, but it shamed him to think about himself in that light. She always had this way of cutting right to the heart of the matter.

Finally, Natalia tired of waiting for a response. "That's what I thought. You know," she stepped closer and stuck her finger in his face, "you can tell a lot about people by the way they treat waitresses. And I can tell you aren't the guy I thought you were. Your quidditch success has gone to your head and fed your budding arrogance." She had a full head of steam and quickly turned away and marched toward the castle before she said something she would really regret.

Igor was left devastated in her wake. 'Not the guy she thought he was.' He was a disappointment. Oh, how that stung him. His father threw that word at him frequently, and it never ceased to injure him.

"Natalia please," He scrambled up the hill after her, tripping over his own feet and losing traction on the round pebbles on the path. "I was crass, and obnoxious. I…I don't know why I did that, especially to you. I guess I was just showing off."

She furrowed her brow and stared him down. Was he serious? Perhaps he was, but she was tired of putting up with machismo run amuck. "That's a hell of a way to impress people. You know, anyone who would be impressed by such juvenile antics, isn't worth impressing in my opinion." She stepped around him and began to walk along the path swiftly.

Igor trotted along beside her. "You are right. Natalia," he stopped in front her, "please accept my apology." He was pleading with his eyes, and her resolve began to crumble. "Please. I beg your forgiveness."

She turned to face him in her most businesslike manner. "Say you're sorry and mean it and you are forgiven."

"I am very sorry. My actions were deplorable and they will never happen again."

"Forgiven." She replied curtly, and continued on her way up the hill.

"May I walk you home?"

"It's the least you can do." She quipped, but one corner of her mouth turned up.

They walked along in silence for several minutes. The only sound on the road was that of their footsteps, and of leaves rustling in the breeze. Igor's hands were jammed in his pockets and he looked back and forth, from the road to Natalia. Natalia walked as quickly as she could toward the castle, her stomach twisted in knots that she did not know how to untie. Finally, Igor could not take the uncomfortable silence and broke it.

"You know, I really didn't recognize you today."

"You said that already."

"You look different. Like I said, you've just grown up a bit."

"So have you. I didn't remember you as being this tall."

"I've grown about eight inches since I was here last."

Natalia did not respond. Again, Igor grew uncomfortable with the silence.

"What have you been doing with yourself?"

"Nothing much, working, studying." She said flatly.

"Still working too hard and not having any fun I see."

"Work is fun for me."

"I'm sure your boyfriend wishes you would work less."

"I don't have a boyfriend." She said flatly.

"Oh?" He said with exaggerated curiosity.

Natalia cast a sidelong glance in his direction. For someone who had such a reputation, he was terribly obvious. "You know…you really are NOT smooth."

Igor threw his head back and laughed loudly. "I'd forgotten. You come off like this demure little girl, but then hit me with this razor sharp wit."

"Always."

"Hey, you don't really have to go back to the castle just yet, do you? Let's take a walk down by the lake." He smiled excitedly, thinking about the possibility.

As much as she wanted to, she just couldn't bring herself to say yes, not after all that had happened to her. Although he was miles away, Lucius still controlled her even when he didn't intend to. "Can't. I have a test tomorrow. I've worked all weekend. If I don't study tonight, I'll fail."

"You know. I'm just trying to get to know you." Igor huffed. "You don't have to shut me out every time, do you?"

"I'm not shutting you out. I told you, I have to study. Why do you take everything so personally?" She tried to keep her tone light and believable.

"Fine, what about tomorrow?"

"I'm working for Slughorn in the lab."

"Tuesday then."

"I'm working in the infirmary with Poppy."

"You can't avoid me forever."

"I told you, I'm very busy."

"Fine. I'm sorry I troubled you." Igor veered off from the path and began the walk back to the ship. Natalia watched him go with a regretful sigh. His apology had been heartfelt and charming, and made her feel warm inside. She adored Igor Karkaroff, even after his asinine behavior, but it was better this way. She was not ready, and he would probably break her heart.

_AN: Whew-a little long but I was on a roll. What's up with the mother jokes? Well I watched "White Chicks" this weekend and then found these Hogwarts "Yo Momma" jokes on fanpop. The whole list is there if you google it—it's a hoot. _

_If you want to check out Natalia's haircut, I posted it on my facebook page. ( Sasha Smith I'm the one with the drawing that looks like a young Igor but is actually Russell Brand's Twitter picture.) Hope you liked this one. Things will start getting good now that Igor is back in the picture_.


	18. Chapter 18 Love Hangover

CHAPTER EIGHTEEN

Love Hangover

Natalia went straight to her dorm, feeling more tired than hungry, after a long and trying day of work. The sharp smell of grease in the kitchen, combined with the stale musty smell of butter beer that sat out too long, had caused mild nausea all day and her nerves didn't help. She peeled off her clothing, tossed it carelessly at the foot of her bed, and slipped into a pair of pajamas. When she went to button the pajama top, it was much tighter than usual and she was unable to stretch it across her breasts. She sighed in annoyance, hoping they weren't getting any bigger. The last thing she wanted these days was additional attention from the opposite sex. She was due to start her period any day now, so she chalked it up to being a bit bloated. Natalia pulled a baggy t-shirt out of her drawer and threw that on.

She settled onto her bed, with the intent of studying, but when she looked at the pages in the book, she could not focus on the words. Images of Igor cluttered her mind as she re-read the same paragraph three times without comprehension. She closed her eyes and visualized him commanding the attention of the room with his dim-witted jokes, his horrified face when she confronted him, and then, the concerned droop in the corners of his soulful eyes when he sincerely apologized. She wondered what he was doing in that moment. Did he go back to the ship or did he take that walk around the lake? Did he go alone or did he find someone to go with him? Surely a man such as he would not want for company if he so desired it.

She wrung her hands and looked down at them. Her hands were not beautiful, not ladylike or smooth, but they were capable, unencumbered by long nails or jewelry like most girls wore. They were unadorned, straight-forward, and able to take care of whatever came her way. She recalled hso wide, that the corners of her mouth stung, and tried again to focus her eyes on the page. Despite it only being seven o'clock in the evening, her lids were heavy and not cooperating. Several times she jerked herself awake as her head began to drop with sleep, before she finally surrenderedow Lucius' hands were the polar opposite of her own; soft ,smooth, and manicured, untested. When she felt them against her skin, she was reminded of his weakness, born of a coddled existence. However, she now decided she had underestimated him. Never again would she underestimate a man. She would not be blinded by feelings and dreams of what she wanted someone to be. She would rely on her own two hands and no one else's. Igor may be handsome and charming, and all the things witches were supposed to want, but she didn't need him. She had survived this long and didn't need anyone. Natalia yawned .

The following day was Sunday and Natalia was to arrive at The Three Broomsticks at ten for the brunch crowd. She had planned to study late into the night and rise early to work on a divination essay before dashing into town for her shift. When she awoke, she was surprised to find she was alone in the dorm. Perhaps it was still early in the evening and her housemates were still at dinner. She still felt exhausted and decided she couldn't have been asleep long. She checked the clock near her bed and it read eleven. This struck her as odd because it was an hour past lights out and there wasn't a soul in her dorm. Occasionally, some girls would sneak out for a late night rendezvous with boys, but for everyone to be out was unusual. She yawned and stumbled down the stairs to the common room to find the room brighter than normal for this hour. Severus and Regulus were studying at a nearby table.

"Natalia!" Regulus called. "We were beginning to think you had been carried off to the Durmstrang ship."

"Huh?" She rubbed here eyes, not understanding his reference.

"Well, I know Karkaroff was waiting for you outside the kitchen door, and when you didn't show up in the Great Hall for dinner or breakfast…"

"Dinner or breakfast?" Confusion laced with terror chilled her bones. "What time is it?"

"Eleven o'clock in the morning." Severus deadpanned. "Weren't you supposed to work today?"

"Merlin's beard!" Natalia shrieked, and scrambled up the stairs in full freak out mode. How could she have slept that long? The sudden movement of dashing up the stairs made her queasy, and she realized she hadn't eaten since lunch yesterday. Barely entering the room she was already ripping off her t-shirt, and throwing it across the room. She grabbed the first clean shirt her hands landed on, wiggled out of her pj bottoms, kicked them across the room, slung on a pair of jeans, and nearly jumped into her favorite pair of boots. She was nearly back out the door when she realized she'd forgotten her jacket and bag. "Shit! Shit! Shit!" She cursed to herself as she ran back to get them. She dashed through the common room without a word to Severus.

"If we come for lunch, will you give us a discount?" Severus called after her but she ignored him. Rosmerta might very well fire her on the spot. She'd never been a minute late before much less an hour. In fact, no one was ever late for work if they wanted to remain employed. She fretted all the way down the hill, her stomach tied up in knots that she wanted more than anything to vomit out of her system. Several times she had to stop and catch her breath. Normally, she was in decent shape but the stress of the unknown reaction from her employer was apparently consuming resources.

She burst through the back door and nearly ran smack into Rosmerta, standing in the kitchen with her arms crossed. "Oh, how lovely of you to join us today, Miss Smith. Did you have a late night?"

"No." Natalia's chin quivered. "I just slept in."

"Just slept in?" Rosmerta huffed. "Well, I would have loved to sleep in, but you see I have a business to run."

"I'm sorry." Natalia mumbled and wondered how long Rosmerta would toy with her.

"What's the matter with you? You look like death."

Natalia leaned against the wall. She did feel rotten this morning. Perhaps that's why she slept so late. Maybe she was coming down with something. "I'm fine. What would you like me to do first?"

"Cook is slammed. Get over there and help him out. You can fry an egg, can't you?"

"Yes." Natalia grabbed an apron off the hook without looking back at Rosmerta and went over to help the cook. She was quite relieved that Rosmerta didn't fire her the moment she walked in the door, however, she knew she'd better perform well at any task she set about today. She was on thin ice already.

"I need four eggs ever easy, and flip that sausage while you're on that side of the grill." Cook barked orders in his cockney accent as he wiped the sweat of his forehead with the shoulder of his greasy t-shirt. He was a pudgy man, in his mid 50's with massive hair on his arms and a persistent case of body odor. Natalia was quite sure Rosmerta wanted her to work beside him as punishment. However, she was in no position to argue. With a flick of her wand, she levitated the eggs over the grill and cracked them one by one.

Cook was less than fragrant already, and the combination of bacon grease and armpits made her immediately wince and turn her head away. Her stomach churned and she took two steps away from him and flipped the sausage patties browning in a pool of thick, gooey grease before her. The sight of the sausage wasn't helping her constitution, and so she turned her attention back to the eggs. They were browning quickly, so she flipped them over. When she did, she caught a whiff of fried egg that set her over the edge. The bile rose up to burn the back of her throat and she had to push cook practically face first into the grill to get past him and run for the loo.

"What the bleedin' hell is the matter with you?" He growled at her.

Natalia didn't hear him, so focused was she in getting her head in the pot. She heaved hard but very little came out. Her abdomen convulsed several times, each time producing only a mouthful of saliva with a bitter pinch of bile. Eventually, she lay there with her head on the rim sweating profusely and waiting for the dry heaves to subside so she could stand.

"Natalia? Are you all right?" Rosmerta's tone was kind as she rapped lightly at the door. She entered the loo without asking, and Natalia quickly wiped her mouth with a bit of toilet paper.

"I'll be all right. Maybe that's why I overslept. Perhaps it's a touch of the flu."

"Did you have a late night with young Mr. Karkaroff? I saw him walking you home."

"Oh, no. He was very kind and apologized, but he walked me to the castle and that was it. I was in my room by seven and hoped to study, but I fell asleep."

"You slept from seven last night till eleven this morning?"

"I'm afraid so. I don't know what's the matter with me."  
>Rosmerta cast an appraising look over her and Natalia knew she didn't believe<p>

her. If she were in Rosmerta's shoes, with a student in such shape, she would swear the student was hung-over. She was in trouble for sure now.

"Natalia, I need to ask you something, and I need you to tell me the truth."

Natalia swallowed hard and hoped she could be convincing. Igor would surely vouch for her, but his word wouldn't be much good.

"My dear," she took her hand gently, "Is there a possibility that you could be pregnant?"

All the blood dropped out of Natalia's body and into her feet which began to burn. "Ex-scuse me?"

"Is there a possibility that you could be pregnant?"

"No! No way." Natalia shook her head violently and scrambled to her feet. "I'm fine. It's just the flu." She busied herself, smoothing her apron and trying to pull herself together.

"So, you are telling me you have not had unprotected sex in the last month or so." Rosmerta queried with raised eyebrows.

Natalia looked at her in horror then sunk down to sit on the loo. How could this be happening to her?

"I thought so. Do your breasts hurt? Do they feel swollen?"

They did. Was that a sign? "Y-yes."

"That's a sure sign."

"Oh. No, that can't be." Surely it could not be. How could her nightmare get any worse? It wasn't possible for this to be happening to her.

"You have morning sickness." Rosemerta crossed her arms and spoke with authority. "You're exhausted. You're quite scatterbrained this morning as well. I'd bet The Three Broomsticks on it."

"Well, you would lose. It's impossible." If she denied it hard enough, maybe it wouldn't be true.

"Have you taken a test?"

"No. Why would I do that? I can assure you it's quite…"

"Natalia, don't kid yourself. I know you don't want to accept it, but I have a feeling it's not out of the realm of possibility."

"No." Natalia continued to shake her head.

"Denying it won't make it not true. Take a test. If it's negative, you won't have to worry about it."

Natalia's mind raced. It was too much to take in. However, she was as always a realist and a decisive one at that. "Fine."

Rosmerta opened the medicine cabinet and pulled out a pregnancy test box.

"Keep those lying around, do you?" Natalia snarked, angry at the situation and taking it out on the one person who was trying to help.

"Do you think you're the first Hogwarts girl with this problem?"

"I don't have a problem." Natalia snapped at her.

"Well, we'll know in a moment, won't we? Pee on that little stick in there and we'll have our answer in a minute."

"Pee on the stick?" Natalia snarled. "Seriously? Isn't there a spell or some kind of charm?"

"Some things are best done the old fashioned way, particularly when it comes to procreation." Rosmerta left her alone in the loo.

Natalia opened the test and read the directions three times, wanting to eliminate all possibility of error. The thought of peeing on the stick seemed silly and far to elementary for the situation, but she dutifully complied and desperately hoped for the best. When she was finished, she exited the loo with the stick, but did not look at it. Looking at the stick could potentially alter the course of her life forever, and she wasn't ready for that. Rosmerta was standing outside the door, leaning against the wall with her hands behind her back. Natalia handed her the stick. "You read it." She said.

Rosemerta took the stick and glanced at it. Then she met Natalia's gaze with sad eyes. "You're pregnant, Natalia."

_AN: Da, Da Daaaaaa! Poor Natalia! Now what will she do? Will she tell anyone? What would Igor do? Thank you for all the reviews this week! You guys are the best. _

_I've posted a link on my profile to my facebook page-hopefully it will work. _


	19. Chapter 19 Alone Again naturally

CHAPTER NINETEEN

Alone Again (naturally)

Dear Lucius,

I have to see you right away. Please, it's terribly important. Meet me in the alley behind the bookstore in Diagon Alley at noon tomorrow. I'm quite certain you remember the location to which I'm referring. Come alone and tell no one. I'll be waiting for you.

N.  
>Sitting alone in his room, Lucius perused the letter several times, enjoying the perverse twitch of his cock each time he did. For weeks after World Cup he'd been feeling horrible about what he'd done to her. Although, he felt he'd done what he had to do, and that there was no other choice he could have made to keep her safe, he still felt miserable at having hurt his lovely Natalia. Despite his rejection of her, his abuse of her, and his deeply ingrained sense of superiority, he still thought of her as his own.<p>

Now to see her direct request in script in front of him, begging to see him, he knew despite his actions, she was truly his. His attack on her had been brutal, and when he left her sobbing that night, he knew she had been shattered in numerous ways. She surely knew he was dangerous, that his tendencies had become violent, and that he would always lord power over her, and still, she was unable to help herself. She must still be fantasizing about him and wanting more. That was obvious, considering her desperate tone and the way she begged him to see her immediately. She needed him, her own words. The last several times he'd seen Natalia, she held the upper hand. She had been haughty, and aloof, but as the song went, the change had come and she was under his thumb. He was already thinking about how he would toy with her and make her continue to beg. For nearly a year, he'd carried the mark of the Dark Lord's followers, and though it was not always easy, generally he reveled in the power it gave him.

He was already late for dinner with Narcissa at the upscale magical restaurant, Amaranth. It was over-priced and the service was fussy to the point of madness, but it was the most expensive place in town and was an excellent spot to see and be seen. He was quiet during dinner as Narcissa prattled on endlessly about several upcoming engagement parties that were being given in their honor and how they could top ones that were thrown for other couples. He listened, nodded, and made all appropriate responses, but was mentally disengaged from the conversation. Their engagement was according to tradition, a long process, with the excuse being that it would take so much time to effectively plan a wedding worthy of the Black and Malfoy families.

Thinking of his upcoming meeting with Natalia was making him ridiculously horny, more so than usual, and he squirmed in his chair. He watched his bride-to-be across the table and admired her shape. She was a beautiful girl with a fantastic body. Soon she would be all his, and while he didn't love her, he was looking forward to all the pleasures that marriage would afford him. And now considering Natalia's proposition, it looked like he would be able to have his cake and eat it too. Yes, life was finally shaping up nicely. He would have his trophy wife that he would proudly present at social occasions and ravish on demand, he would have his money and his power, and now he would also have his randy little mistress on the side. He smiled to himself and wondered if he might be able to convince Natalia to at least wear a french maid outfit even if she would not agree to work for him as part of his domestic staff. After he ended the evening with Narcissa and returned home, he settled into bed. He could hardly contain his glee. He was too excited to sleep, and decided to have a wank to relax himself before drifting off.

The following day he rose and dressed early. He went out for a long fly on his Firebolt and came back feeling invigorated and ready to go meet Natalia. He enjoyed another wank, showered, put on the latest fashion that just happened to be in his closet, doused himself in expensive french cologne and dashed out to meet his afternoon delight.

Lucius was fifteen minutes early but Natalia was already there. She turned quickly to meet him and he was immediately struck by here change in appearance. Gone were the long luxurious locks of ebony hair that she wore at World Cup. Now she wore her hair cropped short and slightly spiky. It framed her face beautifully and he found it very sexy. It made her look, tough, in charge, like she wouldn't put up with any of his shenanigans. The thought of being put in his place on a romantic level excited him. Her eyes were darker than he remembered, or maybe it was just her expression. Then there was her body. It had only been a few weeks since World Cup but she appeared even more shapely, and her complexion seemed to glow. Obviously she was flushed with the excitement of seeing him. He raised his chin with a slight smirk and swaggered over to her. Her eyes bored into his with a look that he knew signaled desire. When he reached her he took her hand gently and raised it to his lips.

"Bonjour Natalia." He breathed in French thinking that made him sound more exotic and worldly. "I was so pleased to receive your letter. I've missed you as well you see." Natalia made no response, merely looked intently at him. "You feel the connection between us too don't you?"

With a violent jerk, she ripped her hand out of his. "Are you mad? After what you did to me?"

He was taken aback by her response. While he knew she must have been upset, her letter suggested that she was over that. He now realized he would have the unfortunate task of trying to explain away his actions. He sighed, and looked down at his feet. She could always reduce him to this nervous school boy posture, and if he was being honest with himself, he enjoyed it when she dominated him. It was a nice change. Still it didn't make the task any less difficult. "I realize my actions may have caused you some short term pain." He began his explanation knowing full well he would never tell her the whole truth. To bring the Dark Lord's name into this would be madness. He would have to own these actions alone. "But surely you realize it was our destiny." He was quite proud of himself for utilizing the word destiny. Witches loved that rubbish.

"Destiny?" She raised both eyebrows. "Seriously? Destiny? You believe it was my destiny to be bent over a bar and taken against my will? Really? Really?"

She was working up some steam. Her dark eyes flashed and the sight of her angry excited him further. He was about to have the buzz kill of a lifetime however when she uttered her next sentence.

"I'm pregnant." She paused, allowing him time to react but her words were so incomprehensible that they did not register. He blinked several times, before responding.

"W-what did you say?" He stammered his words that came out barely above a whisper.

"Judging from your reaction, I think it's safe to assume you heard me the first time. I'm pregnant Lucius. What's the matter? Isn't this part of our destiny?"

His instinct for self preservation took over immediately. "OUR destiny?" One eyebrow shot up as the Malfoy mask that he used to cover his emotions descended over his expression. "It seems this is your destiny but I see no reason why it should be mine."

"Really?"

"Really."

"And what is that supposed to mean?"

"Surely you aren't suggesting that this is my child. We only did it once."

"It only takes one time and I've never been with anyone else." Her face was red with fury.

Lucius was immediately desperate to remove himself from this situation. There was no way he would let her manipulate him to this degree. "I'm sure you would like it to be me." He began with a condescending tone.

"Oh for Merlin's sake! Are you honestly that full of yourself?"

His mouth dropped open to make a response but nothing clever came to mind and he closed it quickly.

"I'd rather this be anyone's child but yours, you conceited creep! But it is your's and you know it don't you? I've never been with anyone but you Lucius! I've never even kissed anyone but you! How can you stand here and speak to me like you don't know exactly what happened between us?" She was enraged and projected power and strength. He was unnerved until he saw a tear escape from her eye. She was terrified, and she had come to him for help. His heart softened and he knew in an instant that he would help her. If he handled this properly, it need not interfere with what he felt was their true destiny, which was for her to remain his clandestine lover.

"Oh Natalia, I'm sorry." He enveloped her in his arms and pulled her against his chest. "I don't know why I said something like that. You took me by surprise, darling." He couldn't see her face, but her shoulders shook once, only once with a sob. "It's going to be alright." He kissed her forehead and stroked the back of her neck. "I'll help you. I'll be there for you."

"You will?" She looked up at him with her large red-rimmed eyes.

"Of course I will."

"Thank you Lucius." She hugged him tightly causing him to remember the purest part of his feelings for her. "I've been so scared."

"I'm sure you have."

"I almost didn't tell you, but I just didn't know what else to do. I don't have any money. I'm sure I'll be expelled from school when the professors find out. If you're with me I know this will be so much easier."

"Of course it will. Don't worry darling. I'll handle everything."

"Handle everything?" She looked at him slightly surprised.

"Yes. I know this healer. He attended Durmstrang and after his healing instruction worked at St. Mungos for a time. However, he was inclined to practice some rather non-traditional methods and some considered him slightly dark."

"Dark?" She blinked and shook her head.

"Well you know people have very different opinions on this kind of thing. However he does still perform the spells to abort and was extremely gifted with potions that will ensure there will be no permanent damage."

"Abort?"

"Ah, yes. Why, did you have someone else in mind?"

"Lucius, I'm not going to abort this pregnancy."

His face turned to stone as if he had seen Medusa.

"How could you ever think that I would do such a thing?"

He stood there gaping at her. "Wha..."

"I'm NOT having an abortion."

Now he was angry. Who did she think she was?

"You most certainly are!" He spat.

"I am not."

He turned away and took a deep breath while clenching his jaw. When he felt steady again he turned back to her, but was barely able to control his rage. "Well what, may I ask do you intend to do? Give the child up for adoption?  
>"And abandon it the same way I was? You know me better than that. No Lucius, I am going to have this baby and keep this baby. I will never abandon our child."<p>

"OUR child!" The mere words disgusted him. "Your child my dear not mine!"

"Oh yes, yours!"

"Don't I have any say in this?"

"You had say in making this baby, and I had none. Now I have my say."

Lucius flew into a rage, pushing her violently back against the brick wall and shoving his wand under her chin. "Now you listen to me!" He hissed at her. "I am engaged to another women from one of the finest wizarding families in the world. I am well respected and I have a brilliant future. So don't think for one moment that I'm going to let some slut parade in here and ruin everything. This child is not mine."

"It is yours!" She screamed through tears. "Not too long ago you told me you loved me. You told me you wanted to run away with me. What's happened to you?"

"Look at this!" He whipped up his sleeve and shoved the dark mark under her face. "Do you see this? Do you understand what this means?"

"I-is that..." she stammered.

"Yes. Yes my dear it is. I'm a member of the Dark Lords trusted inner circle. That means we do things on my terms. This is not my child. If you think you're going to go public with this, think again. If you choose to have an abortion, I'll handle it all. You'll be well taken care of. However if you choose to defy me, you'll be on your own."

With one last cry of anguish she jerked away from him and ran away, leaving him alone with his self loathing.

AN: Well that was about what you would expect from Lucius but oh dear what will Natalia do now? Who will come to her rescue? It's not who you may think! Hope all of you in America are having a Happy Thanksgiving! I will be very thankful if you will leave me a review:)


	20. Chapter 20 Games Without Frontiers

CHAPTER TWENTY

Games Without Frontiers

Natalia stormed angrily away from Lucius and into the Leaky Cauldron through the back door. She stalked through the kitchen ignoring the startled staff, then made her way to the main room. She looked at none of the patrons but walked with purpose directly to the floo, threw down some powder with an angry thrust and flooed herself back to The Three Broomsticks. Much to her relief, the pub was nearly empty. After her horribly unproductive confrontation with Lucius she didn't have the head for a difficult day.

She charged into the kitchen huffing and puffing, and yanked her apron down off the hook. She pulled so hard that she ripped the hook out of the wall and it crashed on the floor. The noise attracted the attention of Rosmerta, Cook and Roxanne who were already there. Natalia growled and angrily tied her apron at the waist, before whipping out her wand and barking "repairo!" to reattach the hook to the wall.

"Good morning Natalia." Rosmerta, seated at her desk, peered over her cup of tea and greeted her young friend with a patronizingly soft tone.

"Whatever." Natalia snapped back before grabbing a tray of clean mugs, slamming her hip against the door and pushing her way out to the main dining room.

Both Cook and Roxanne gaped wide-eyed at Rosmerta waiting for some kind of explanation for the normally quiet Natalia's disagreeable behavior.

Rosmerta certainly knew what was wrong, but wasn't about to betray Natalia's trust by sharing her personal information with those two clods. "Probably just that time of the month. I'll go check on her." Rosmerta waved her hand dismissively and went after Natalia. She found her levitating glasses onto their proper places under the bar, a rag swept over the dust covered windows and the chairs left their current position on top of the tables and resumed their rightful positions on the floor. As always, Natalia was a master of efficiency particularly when she was angry. Properly channeled aggression was a good thing in Rosmerta's opinion. The more time she spent with this young girl, the fonder of her she grew.

"Natalia are you alright?" Rosmerta asked while approaching her tentatively.

"Fine." Natalia replied flatly.

"You don't have to lie to me. You're obviously furious with someone." Rosmerta paused and waited for a response, but none came. So she continued. "Would you like to tell me who?"

"With all due respect, no Mme Rosmerta. I would not." Natalia sighed.

"Are you sure there isn't something I can do for you? You know we haven't really talked since you found out you were..."

"I DON'T want to talk about it!" She shrieked.

Rosmerta backed up. "All right." She knew when to back off. "I'm here if you need me." Rosmerta patted her gently on the back before quietly leaving the room

"Hey Snivellus! Where do you think you're going?"

Severus ignored Potter and his Marauder buddy Sirius, and quickened his pace towards Hogsmeade. Why couldn't they just leave him alone? What else did Potter possibly think he could take from him? Potter was well off, well liked, although why was a mystery to Severus, he was Tri-Wizard Champion and worst of all the thief who stole from Severus the only thing that truly mattered in this world, Lily. What more could he possibly want? Why did he seem to live to torture Severus? He looked down, hunched his shoulders, and kept walking.

"Snivellus!" Potter kept after him. "Hey Snivellus! Hey you coward I'm talking to you?"

Severus was many things but a coward was not one of them. The very word stopped him dead in his tracks. While he didn't want a fight and knew he was outnumbered as usual, he refused to live in fear of one. He narrowed his eyes and slowly turned. "Oh I'm sorry, were you speaking to me? My apologies but I don't speak asshole."

"Phfft!" Sirius who was standing by James' side as always snickered.

Potter smacked him in the chest with the back of his hand to silence him. Sirius quickly stifled his giggles. "Oh how clever Snivellus. Stay up all night thinking that up did you? Better keep working on your material."

Severus kept his eyes trained on Potter while he went for his wand. As usual however he was outnumbered and out wanded as Sirius jumped into the fray. "Expelliarmus!" Sirius tossed a nearly effortless hex his way and now poor Severus was unarmed and once again at their mercy.

"Thank you Padfoot. Now Severus, where were we, when we last left off? Ah yes, Levi corpus!" And with that, Severus was once again dangling by his ankle in midair while being subjected to the taunts and laughter of his attackers.

At that precise moment Igor and Levin came strolling down the hill. "Hey Igor," Levin nodded in the direction of the scuffle. "Check it out."

"Whoa!" Igor snickered when he looked up to find the gangly boy upside down and swinging in the air. "What's this?"

"Looks like Potter getting the best of some poor bloke."

"Hmpf." Igor huffed. He'd already had enough of Potter since the night the champions were chosen. "Wonder what his problem is now?"

"Hey isn't that guy in the air Natalia's friend?" Levin squinted to get a better look. "That greasy cat, what's his name?"

"Snape." Igor replied thoughtfully. He knew Snape. He was a bit on the snarky side but surely not deserving of this humiliation.

"Yeah, that's him. HA! Snape, what a name. With a name like that, no wonder he's getting picked on."

Igor watched as Severus flailed his arms about helplessly. It made him squirm uncomfortably to see such a sight. He couldn't imagine the humiliation Snape must be feeling. And this boy was a friend of Natalia's too. Potter was such an arrogant sot. For weeks after the Champions had been chosen, Igor had been sizing him up and didn't like what he saw. Potter was all mouth as long as his followers were around, but not much when they weren't. Igor was looking forward to taking him out in the tournament, but now a new thought occurred to him. If he started in on Potter today, and took up for Snape, that might raise his stock in Natalia's eyes. It bugged him the way that little girl paid him no mind. If he helped her friend, she was bound to take notice.

"Come on Levin. Let's have some fun." Igor's lip curled up in a sneer as he headed towards the fight.

"Oh, this should be good." Levin giggled as he scurried behind him.

When they were about twenty meters away, Igor leaned towards Levin and laid out his strategy. "You deal with his crony, I'll deal with Potter."

"Noooo problem." Levin was all in for this little project.

"Expelliarmus!" Igor bellowed in his booming voice that echoed across the glen. Instantly James was wide eyed as his wand flew through the air and Igor grabbed it with a self-satisfied smirk. Severus fell from the air and was about to have a terrible fall. "Arresto momentum." Igor saved him from smacking the ground. Severus hovered for a moment, before lightly hitting the earth.

"Incarcerous!" Levin trained his wand on Sirius Black who was instantly bound up by newly incarnated ropes."

"What the? Undo this now you Russian prick!" Sirius spat as he squirmed within the ropes.

"Shut it!" Levin drawled lazily and gave another leisurely flick of his wand sending the ropes across the yapping mouth of Sirius thus silencing him.

"Levi corpus!" Igor went after Potter and now he was the one dangling in the air, flailing about with a red face. "You see, you aren't the only one who knows that spell four-eyes!" Igor sneered. He kept his wand trained on Potter but walked over to Severus who was still laying on the ground observing in amazement. Igor extended his free hand to help him up. "Are you all right there Snape?"

Severus looked at the hand before him, then up at Igor. He knew this help wouldn't come without a price, and was suspicious. However any enemy of Potter was a friend of his, and so he reluctantly accepted Igor's hand, and was pulled up to standing.

"Tell me Severus, what do you think we should do to people who can't fight fair?" Igor's voice lilted as if this were a matter of little concern to him.

Assuming this was a rhetorical question, Severus remained silent. But Igor was determined to draw him out.

"While this is a useful pass time, I have no desire to spend my entire day in this occupation. However I am reluctant to let such a coward roam the streets of Hogsmeade. What shall we do?"

Normally Severus attempted to remain above the fray, but the possibility of humiliating Potter was too rib tickling to resist. "Well," he replied with a scowl, "you could always hang him on the tree over there."

"Excellent idea! Igor laughed. "And I think we can put his friend up there with him. Can't have him getting lonely now can we?"

Igor focused his attention back on Potter and began to float Potter in the direction of a spindly looking oak. "Levin, can you take care of the other one?"

"I'm all over it." And with that Sirius black was on his way to the tree with his friend.

Severus watched while stifling a grin. He'd never seen anyone stick it to Potter like this and was beginning to like these two foreigners with the thick accents and flamboyant mode of dress. Potter struggled to no avail and soon found himself hanging on the tree with a tree branch looped through his belt. Sirius was soon deposited beside him with another tree branch secured beneath the ropes.

"Much better." Igor declared as he slipped his wand back into his pocket. "Shall we head into down?" He nodded towards Levin.

"We shall! That was fun. An excellent project! I'm glad you suggested it!"

"Will you join us Snape?" Igor smiled and raised his eyebrows hopefully. If Snape came with them, and Natalia saw them, it might give him a better opening to talk to her. It certainly couldn't go any worse than the last time. But Snape was only scowling and not answering. His social graces left much to be desired. "Come on. I'll buy you a butter beer."

Severus shrugged. "All right." He tried to sound disinterested but was secretly grateful to have a new friend, particularly one who could best Potter and Black.

"Excellent." Igor said as he warmly put his arm over Snape's shoulder. "Those two won't be giving us any more trouble."

Severus cringed at being touched but he was willing to endure it considering what had just transpired. He looked over his shoulder one last time to see Potter and Black struggling and failing to free themselves. With a snicker and a half smile, he walked down the hill with his new friends. He wasn't sure how to relate to these boys from another part of the world. He needent have worried however as Igor and Levin ran their mouths about anything and nothing for the entire journey to Hogsmeade. There were no awkward pauses needing to be filled. Severus merely nodded and made appropriate yes and no responses.

The Three Broomsticks was already busting with students when they arrived. Igor scanned the room for the impossible little waitress that he was slightly obsessed with in spite of himself and his refusal to admit it. He spotted her across the room setting four heavy mugs of foamy butter beer down in front of four unappreciative Ravenclaw students. They laughed at an inside joke, not even noticing her. She stopped to sigh and wipe the sweat off her brow with the back of her hand. Her face and neck were blotchy and she had dark circles under her eyes. Igor's heart sank when he saw her. Here he and Levin were having a delightful morning while this little thing worked her fingers to the bone because she had to. She should have been enjoying the morning with friends but instead she looked like she had the weight of the world on her shoulders.

His eyes felt heavier as they followed her around the room. It was exhausting to watch her. She worked quickly and unobtrusively, but with no smile, no light. While normally she went about her work with enthusiasm, today she looked as though she might burst into tears at any moment. It was several minutes before she made her way over to their table. Igor decided he was going to redeem himself today. If anyone had a way with women it was him. He would get her to smile.

"Good afternoon Natalia." Igor said in what he thought was his most seductive tone.

"Good afternoon." She responded mechanically while looking at Severus questioningly. "What can I get for you gentlemen?"

"What do you recommend?" He drawled slowly, desperately trying to attract her attention.

Natalia furrowed her brow and turned to Igor who was looking at her under heavy lids. "Seriously?" She snarled. "Where do you think you are?"

Igor sighed hopelessly. She was bringing down his good mood. Why wasn't she responding to him? He was making a good faith effort.

"Why don't we start with a round of drinks?" Levin piped up in an attempt to cover for his friend.

"Excellent idea. Shall I get you all some pumpkin juice or do you plan on drinking yourselves into oblivion as usual?" Natalia quipped sarcastically.

"No, we'll just have pumpkin juice this afternoon." Igor said frowning.

"Coming right up." Natalia hurried over to the bar.

Igor seized the moment with his new friend Severus. "You're good friends with Natalia right?"

"I suppose." Severus' tone was cautious.

"How did you become such good friends?" Igor pressed.  
>Severus shrugged. "I don't recall. We were both sorted into Slytherin and just became friends. Similar backgrounds, and work ethics, so we had that in common. Neither of us are particularly social, so I guess we just fell in together. Why do you ask?"<p>

Igor furrowed his brow. He wasn't really sure why he was asking. It was just troublesome for some reason.

"I'll tell you why." Levin interrupted. "He can't stand it if he thinks someone doesn't like him."

"That's not true!" Igor spat.

"It is so!"

"If that were so, why did I suggest fucking with Potter and his idiotic sidekick?"

"Because you already don't like them and you're trying to get inside Potter's head prior to the first task." Levin slapped his hand on the table for emphasis.

"I don't care what anyone thinks of me." He shook his head haughtily.

"Then why are we having this conversation?" Levin laughed.

"I have no idea." Igor was angry now. Levin was agitating sometimes particularly so when he called him out in front of people like he was doing now in front of Severus. Natalia returned to their table with three glasses of pumpkin juice. She set them down in front of the boys and then wiped her forehead again with the back of her hand again. She reminded him of some of the village girls back in Russia. They were not worldly, not sophisticated, just sweet and wholesome looking. Seeing a girl like her made him a little homesick. And so he tried again. "You look lovely today Natalia." He said softly.

She straightened up and glared at him. She looked down at her hopelessly out of date clothes with the now dirty apron tied around her waist. Her neck flushed red and her lower lip began to tremble. For a moment he thought she might cry, but then she seemed to steady herself before responding, "Eat shit Karkaroff." And walking out the back door.

Igor slouched back in his chair and watched in minor disbelief. What was with her? As soon as she was out of earshot, Levin dissolved into a fit of giggles. "Well done Iggy. At least now you know what's on special. And how would you like that prepared?"

Igor ignored the joke, but instead turned back to Severus. "Do you see? No matter what I say, no matter how nice I am to her, she's a class A bitch!" He slapped the table for emphasis.

Severus was more concerned with Natalia than he was with Igor's ego. He was sure something was amiss, for this was harsh even for her. He turned back to Karkaroff. "Ever think that might have nothing to do with you? Are you that self centered that you think her mood hinges on you?"

"Hi Severus!" All three heads turned to find Sasha Malfoy entering the room. She was dressed in snuggly fitting quidditch practice robes with the top several buttons undone on her sweater. Her cheeks were flushed and her blond hair was tousled about and complimented her broad smile and blue eyes that were beaming at Severus.

Igor was the only one at the table who was genuinely glad to see her. "Finally a woman I understand." He grumbled under his breath. He and Sasha had a comfortable relationship, which he would describe as friends with benefits, although it wasn't quite as beneficial as other people probably thought. She pulled up a chair and wiggled in between Severus and Igor, putting an arm on each of their shoulders.

"Severus, and Igor, my two favorite men, can you please tell me why I just had to extract my two other favorite men from a tree?" She leaned closer to Severus for and answer but he was too busy looking down her shirt to respond. She noticed and crossed her arms enhance the visual. Severus then remembered himself, looked away and took a sip of his pumpkin juice.

Igor was in desperate need of some female attention. "Oh Severus, Levin and I were just having a little harmless fun. There's nothing wrong with that is there?"

"Padfoot and Prongs certainly thought there was something wrong with it. They are furious. They came charging straight down to town to look for you three."

"Well they must not be looking too hard or they would have come in here by now."

"Ha!" She laughed, "I believe you're right there."

"Tell me something Sasha?"

"What?"

"Are we really your two favorite men?" He asked with a grin.

She smiled broadly and tossed her hair back. "Well really just Severus, but you're at least in the top ten."

He laughed loudly; as it sounded like something he would say. "Top ten?" He put a hand over his heart. "I'm crushed."

It didn't take Severus long to get enough of this foolishness. Without a word he left the table to go and find Natalia. She had not come back in despite there being at least two more tables that required a waitress. He managed to sneak out the back door and found her in the alley leaning against a stack of crates with one hand on the brick wall to brace herself. She was wretching violently, repeatedly, her shoulders shaking after each heave.

"Natalia, are you alright?" Severus took two steps toward her but was unsure if he should go further, perhaps she wanted privacy. She wretched again.

"I'm fine Severus," she mumbled. "Just leave me alone."

"Don't be silly." He stepped closer and put a hand on her back. "You shouldn't be working in such a state. I didn't think you looked well. Let me fetch a healer or get you to Poppy."

"No! Absolutely not." She shook her head quickly and turned to face him with pleading eyes. Her skin was ghastly white, and her face contorted with an emotion he couldn't identify.

"Why? You're obviously ill. I'm sure Rosmerta will understand."

"No. Please just go. I'll be fine." She waved her hand quickly to shoo him away.

Mme Rosmerta, as if on cue, entered they alleyway and interrupted them. "She's fine Severus. Leave this to me." She put her arms on Natalia's shoulders and began to guide her back into the building.

"Leave what to you?" Severus was outraged. "This girl needs medical attention."

"No. I don't Severus. I'm…" Natalia started, but then trailed off.

"You're what?"

"Natalia, think before you speak of this." Rosmerta cautioned, knowing full well what could happen.

"Someone tell me what's going on." Severus demanded. He hated to be left in the dark.

"I'm pregnant Severus."

"You're what?"

She couldn't repeat it. It was too awful. She looked at her feet for a few seconds before sobs erupted and her whole body shook in anguish. Rosmerta covered her body with her own in a vain effort to comfort her.

As always, Severus was deathly calm in the face of bad situations. "Who is the father?" He asked, sounding quite fatherly himself.

She had to take several deep breaths before she was composed enough to respond, "Lucius."

It was Mme Rosmerta's turn to gasp in shock now. This was news to her.

"Lucius." He drawled the name out in distain. " I thought you were done with him. When did this happen?"

"At the world cup. Afterwards, he was blind drunk. He forced me."

"You mean to tell me he raped you?" Severus went ice cold and murderous at the thought of that pompous arse hurting such a dear friend such as Natalia. "He'll pay for this."

"No Severus. Please don't do anything. I just want to forget this ever happened."

"Rather difficult to do that with a child on the way. I'll see to that swine."

"No please don't hurt him."

"You would defend him?"

"I just…I just…I don't know what I want. I just want to never see him again."

"He has to be told Natalia. He has to help you."

"I've already told him. He said he doesn't remember a thing and since I have no proof, he is not obligated to help."

"Callous bastard. He can't do this."

"It's all right. I don't need him. I'll just go to school as long as I can and..." her voice caught. "Well maybe someday, Dumbledore will let me come back." She broke down in a fresh fit of sobs.

Severus understood her completely. She would never abandon or abort a child after all she had been through. However the thought of having to leave school was a fate worse than death. To lose her education, well it was probably the worst thing that could happen to a girl like Natalia. Lucius probably never gave it a second thought. Severus was sick to death of rich pricks like James and Lucius doing whatever they wanted to people. How dare they disregard people like he and Natalia. Someone had to stand up to them. Already emboldened after the incident with Potter in the morning, Severus made his mind up quickly. "Don't worry Natalia. I'm going to take care of this."

AN: UGH! So sorry for such a long delay. This chapter was agonizing to write for some reason. It's just one of those necessary chapters to get from plot point A to plot point B. Oh that Severus is such the "stand up guy" isn't he? And then there is Iggy, the well-packaged mass of insecurities. Poor Natalia. Someone told me they would like to give her a hug, but they would be afraid she would punch them. Well, she has quite a bit to be cranky about don't you think?

_Sorry for any mistakes (I'm sure I'm about 90% short on commas.) I am without beta at the moment, so all the blame lies with me alone Please share your thoughts. Also, I'm open to suggestions on Tri-Wizard tasks if anyone has any ideas they would like to share! Big thanks to all who have reviewed and I will try to crank out updates on a more regular basis. _


	21. Chapter 21 Somebody's Baby

CHAPTER TWENTY-ONE

Somebody's Baby

Severus stood on the edge of the grounds of Malfoy Manor marveling at the size and grandeur of the structure. As if the ostentatious architecture and the overly fussy landscaping littered with topiaries and enormous boxwood hedges weren't enough, there were also white peacocks strutting around, fanning their feathers to impress the peahens. If that wasn't a perfect animagus Lucius Malfoy, Severus didn't know what was. It wouldn't have surprised him one bit if one of them would suddenly morph into Lucius. He started up the smooth white pebble path, stones crunching under his feet.

If the estate was Lucius embodied in landscape architecture, it was also the exact opposite of his sister Sasha. He wondered what her childhood was like growing up in such a place. She seemed to feel embarrassed by her family, but loving and protective of them, particularly Lucius, at the same time. He could relate to that, though not for the same reasons. Anyone would have been ashamed of his poor family, living in a run down rental. More and more he found himself considering Sasha, not in the way he adored Lily, but in a sexual nature. Hormones were progressively driving his actions these days. Increasingly he found himself watching Sasha, noticing the curves of her body and straining for a glimpse down her blouse whenever she sat across from him. He would never want to marry a girl like that, a free spirit, head in the clouds, overly gregarious. She would become tiresome quickly. But he certainly wouldn't mind losing his virginity to her. He fantasized about Lily most nights as he drifted off to sleep, but envisioned a rapturous Sasha beneath him when he frequently enjoyed a self-indulgent wank. Her insecurities would make her easy prey if he ever got serious about the project. He shook his head and refocused on the task at hand.

He certainly had no designs on Natalia, but by standing up for her, he would strike a blow for himself as well. He was a man now, and not one to be trifled with. Going toe to toe with Malfoy would increase his stock with the Dark Lord's followers that he aspired to join, and he was not the least bit frightened.

He knocked confidently on the ornately carved door with the dragon's head doorknocker. Then he waited for several tedious moments before a shuffling house elf wearing disgustingly filthy rags answered the door. Severus looked down his nose at the timid little sprig. "I'm here to see Lucius Malfoy."

"Dobby regretfully must inform you that young Mr. Malfoy is not in." The little elf squeaked while gazing up at Severus with huge eyes.

"Where is he?" Severus was already impatient.

"Dobby does not know for certain but he has been attending university." The little elf quickly slammed the door in Severus face, causing him to flinch. Severus, however, didn't believe him for one moment. He was too eager to be rid of visitors. Acting on a hunch, he sneaked around to the side of the house, heading towards the pools and gardens. There he found Lucius sipping a glass of brandy and staring off into the abyss of his own estate. The sun was going down and there was a new chill in the air.

"Well, well, well, and I was told you were not at home." Sneered Severus.

Lucius did not turn. It was if he was expecting him. "I have only just returned."

"Without attracting the attention of your house elf? I think it may be time to review your domestic arrangements."

"Are you here to give me a lesson in estate management?"

"No. Would you like to take a guess at my reason for this visit?"

"I'm sure I have no idea." Lucius swilled the brandy around in his glass, sniffed it, and took another sip.

"Really? I'm quite sure that you do." Severus swaggered over until he was towering over a terrified Lucius. "You spoke with Natalia this morning."

"Yes." Lucius drawled, "I did. Jealous?"

"Jealous that I don't have a knocked up rape victim begging me for help while I humiliate her in a desperate attempt to cover my own arse? No, I'm not one bit jealous of that." Severus looked down his nose at Lucius.

"I see she's filled your head with her own fantasies. Well, I always thought you were easily led."

Severus grabbed Lucius by the front of his shirt and violently pulled him to stand up, so they were nose to nose. The brandy snifter smashed into pieces on the stone patio.

"How dare you do this to her? What has she ever done to you?" Severus punctuated his accusation with a violent shake, causing Lucius's head to snap back.

"It's not that simple." Anxiety was evident in his voice and Severus knew he had the upper hand.

"Don't start fabricating your lies for me, I'm not stupid enough to believe them."

"He forced me." Lucius whined.

Severus narrowed his eyes. He had not anticipated this twist. "The Dark Lord."

"Yes. He ordered me and stayed there while it happened. I would have obliterated her memory, but he ordered me not to."

Severus released him, roughly shoving him back down into the chair. "Natalia didn't tell me that."

"She doesn't know." Lucius went on through labored breaths. "I couldn't stand to tell her that someone else witnessed it. Her experience was horrific enough already."

If they had been speaking of any witch other than Natalia, Severus might have felt a grain of sympathy for him. But they weren't. So he didn't. "All the more reason to do the right thing."

"And what is that exactly?" Lucius, tone was back to normal and he began to rant. "I can't acknowledge this child. To do that would be to bring the Dark Lord's name into the scandal and that wouldn't do while he's recruiting followers. Further, he may have me kill the child, or kill Natalia. No, the best thing is to break from the situation entirely. She refuses to have an abortion, so the only option is for her to do this in secret, and on her own."

"Well that would certainly save your hide." Severus sneered, continuing to look down his nose.

"What would you have me do?"

Severus sighed heavily. Sadly in this case, there were few good options. He had no other solution for Lucius. As horrible as it was, perhaps this was the only way. Lucius couldn't acknowledge his culpability with the Dark Lord's name attached without endangering the child and Natalia. They would be better off without him anyway. He could already see it was now up to him to come up with a deal and try to make this palatable to Natalia. "Have you spoken to your father?"  
>"I can't tell him this. It's too awful."<p>

"Yes, but he controls the real money. If you spoke to him, he could at least help Natalia financially and then she would be in a better position to care for this child, YOUR child. Would you have the heir to the Malfoy fortune living in poverty?"

"This child is NOT the heir to the Malfoy fortune. It's illegitimate."

"If you ever cared about her, now is your chance to show it. She needs your help."

"You've lost your mind, Severus. You don't know my father. If you did, you would understand that I can't possibly find the words to tell him about this."

"It appears you already have." Both young wizards turned with a start to find Abraxas Malfoy emerging from the gardens.

"F-father," Lucius stuttered while perspiration broke spontaneously on his brow. "I didn't know you were there."

"That...is painfully obvious." The senior Malfoy walked up the steps whipping fine leather gloves off his hands and tossing them on the table. There was no mistaking his relation to Lucius. Both were tall, with long blonde hair, although Abraxas' hair possessed a slick wave and was secured at the nape of his neck with a black ribbon in a rather old fashioned manner. Both had strong features that provided masculine profiles, however Abraxas eyes were brighter, more thoughtful, and similar to Sasha's. He snapped his fingers and the house elf appeared. The elf glanced briefly at Severus and scowled, annoyed that this intruder found his way in. "Dobby, we would like some sherry."

Severus had to stifle a smirk. He considered sherry a witches drink, but it was the middle of the day, and perhaps propriety was a concern. Not to Lucius who was probably missing the brandy now spilled across the stone.

"Who is your friend Lucius?" Abraxas nodded towards their houseguest.

"This is Severus." Lucius mumbled.

"Severus Snape." Severus repeated while formally extending his hand.

"Snape." The father considered this name for a moment. "Would I know your parents?"

"My father passed many years ago," he lied. It was such a practiced and frequently delivered lie that he almost believed it himself, and no one questioned him. "My mother was Eileen Prince."

"Ah, yes. Gobstone's girl. I remember her." He said dismissively. "Well I see the resemblance. And this... fallen witch, am I to assume this is your sister?"

"I am an only child."

"Ah, Lucius, it's not wise to trifle with another man's witch." Abraxas giggled.

"Natalia is merely a friend. She has no family, so I am here on her behalf."

"Hmmm." Abraxas appraised him. "Admirable." Then he chuckled again, "So you just waltz in here and demand Lucius do something for this girl. You, a man of little connection and what appears to be no wealth. Well, that does take some sand."

Severus merely stared him down, refusing to be intimidated by any member of this clan.

"So," Abraxas now turned his attentions on Lucius. "Who is this little tart? Some witch from university? Some servant girl? Please tell me you have better sense than to go around banging servant girls without using contraceptives."

"The girl's name is Natalia."

"Natalia," Abraxas narrowed his eyes and thought for a moment. "Ahh yes. I know that name. That's the one that you asked me about last year isn't it."

Lucius merely nodded and looked down at the ground. Severus raised a questioning eyebrow at the father but his silent question went unanswered.

"Leave us Snape." Abraxas ordered. "Return to this house at 11 o'clock tonight with the girl and I will have a proposal for you."

It was the best Severus could hope for with all things considered. He nodded and turned to go.

"Severus," Lucius called after him and grabbed his hand. "Please don't tell Natalia about the Dark Lord."

"Why not?"

"It will serve no purpose. It will humiliate her further. It will endanger her if she lets it slip."

"It would absolve you in her eyes."

"I don't believe I deserve absolution." Lucius choked.  
>"Enough of this rubbish." Abraxas put an arm around his son and began to pull<p>

him into the house. "Tonight at eleven. Bring the girl. No shenanigans."

_AN: Severus to the rescue! My hero! Lucius is sweating now. Although Abraxas sounds like this isn't his first time dealing with this kind of thing. Kind of makes one wonder._

_Thank you to Katiemarie090 who has graciously offered to beta this story! I am much in need _

_Hope all of you are enjoying yourselves as we get ready for the holidays!_


	22. Chapter 22 Go Your Own Way

CHAPTER TWENTY TWO

Go Your Own Way

Abraxas sat in his study and drummed his fingers on his desk while appraising this wisp of a girl in front of him. His son's taste in women was baffling. Lucius had the most eligible witch in the country handed to him on a silver platter, and yet here he was dallying with this plain girl with hollow cheeks and baggy clothing. Perhaps there was something interesting under the clothing that he was unaware of, but he doubted it.

Behind her stood Lucius, looking terrified and half-drunk after a long evening of lectures and plotting with his father. Also behind her stood the Snape boy, calm and cool under pressure. He had nothing to fear, for he had made no egregious error. Abraxas had always hoped Lucius would be more like this, but he was, at least today, quite disappointed. He looked back at Natalia, who appeared only slightly terrified, and wondered what her true aim was. Would she be happy with money, or would she press to become a bride? The latter would never happen. It would ruin Lucius socially, and Abraxas would not stand for that.

"And how are we to be sure this child is of Malfoy blood?"

"I have no proof to offer you. You may do the test once the child is born if you don't believe me." Her voice was steady. Was it too steady to be truthful? Abraxas was not sure.

"Not good enough." He clasped his hands together and raised both index fingers thoughtfully to his lips. "I require more evidence. Will you submit to veritaserum?"

"I'm afraid that might harm the baby." Her answer was so quick, he knew she had already anticipated his question, and that irked him.

"Ah yes," Abraxas leaned back in his chair. "Well that is a convenient excuse."

Natalia turned to glare at Lucius demanding with her eyes that he vouch for her.

For once, he stood up for her. "Father, I am quite sure the child is mine."

"What makes you sure? You were with her once. So what?" He shrugged. "Unless you have been her constant companion, you have no idea who else she's been servicing."

Natalia glared angrily at Abraxas, too mad to cry any longer. This man was the reason Lucius was the way he was.

"I invite you into my mind."

Abraxas raised his eyebrows but let her continue.

"Look about my memories if you wish, and you will see there is no other man. I warn you however, Lucius may not have told you everything about our encounter and you might be quite shocked." Natalia raised her chin in defiance.

"How do I know you won't block me from seeing what I'm looking for?"

"You must think me formidable."

Abraxas smirked and drummed his fingers again. Lucius told him what he believed to be everything that evening. He told him again of his love for this witch. He also told him about the Dark Lord's involvement and the rape Lucius was forced to perpetrate as a result. He loved his son despite his shortcomings, and had no desire to witness him at his most shameful worst. Lucius was now looking at the floor, shoulders trembling. Rather than put them all through this humiliation, his father took a leap of faith.

Malfoy senior cleared his throat and walked around to the front of his desk until he was eye to eye with Natalia. She was tall and her eyes did not leave him. As annoyed as he was, her courage was admirable.

"I will give you fifty thousand galleons to care for this child. If you change your mind and decide to get an abortion, you may pocket the remainder. But I will require something of you."

"What's that?"

"You will tell no one of this."

Natalia smirked. "Phfft! No worries there."

It irked Abraxas to think that anyone would even want to deny connections with his family. "You say that now, but you may change your mind. You and Lucius will swear to me you will make the unbreakable vow."

"I'm sure that won't be necessary." Severus piped up.

"It is. If I'm going to pay you off, I require complete silence." He looked back at Natalia

She did not hesitate, so anxious was she to be done with this matter and get out of this house. "I'll do it."

"Father, why am _I_ required to swear?" Lucius began to whine. "Certainly you only require this of her."

"No. Your heart is sentimental and you are not rational when it comes to this girl. You will swear to me if I'm to get you out of this mess. I won't have you confessing one day just to ease your conscience."

Lucius bowed his head. "Very well father."

Abraxas snapped, anxious to be done with it now that his decision was made. "Severus, we require a bonder. Do you know the spell?"

"Of course. Natalia, Lucius, please take Mr. Malfoy's arm."

Abraxas extended his arm and Lucius and Natalia grasped it from either side.

Severus touched his wand to Abraxas' hand. Both Natalia and Lucius eased fingers over to touch his wand as well, keeping the rest of their fingers wrapped around Abraxas. "Do you Lucius, and Natalia swear never to reveal the parentage of this child to another person either directly or indirectly?" An impressive red veil of flame wrapped around the joined hands.

"Yes." Lucius and Natalia answered in unison.

"And the circumstance," prompted Abraxas. "That must remain secret."

"And do you both swear never to reveal the circumstance under which this child was conceived?" Another veil enveloped their hands.

"Yes." They answered again; never considering the far-reaching consequences this vow would bring them.

Severus looked at Abraxas to see if he required any further vows. Abraxas nodded and Severus ended the spell.

"Now," Abraxas pulled his hand away quickly. "Get this witch out of my house. I'll make the deposit in Gringotts tomorrow and send you confirmation."

Natalia turned quickly to go.

"But father, what about Severus?" Lucius asked. "He knows everything."

"Natalia kept going towards the door.

"I find Severus to be a young man of admirable courage and character. If you wouldn't mind Severus, I'd like a word with you."

"I'll meet you outside Severus." Natalia whispered without turning and left the room.

Lucius lingered but was soon ordered away with a dismissive nod from his father. "I'd like a word with him alone, my son."

"Yes father." Lucius backed out of the room anxious to go after Natalia. He found her scurrying across the marble foyer toward the front door.

"Natalia!" She turned to see Lucius exiting the room.

She knew she should run, but it might be the last contact she would ever have with the father of her child. So she stood rooted in her spot waiting for him.

When he reached her, his eyes were cloudy and his face serious. He took several breaths, just looking at her before he spoke.

"May I?" Slowly he reached his hand out nearing her stomach. Her eyes darted to his to find them pleading with her, so softly, so sadly. "Please."

She nodded and he gently placed his hand over her womb. Breath left him sharply but his hand remained and he held her gaze. "You will take good care…of…our child?"

Natalia covered his hand with her own gently, but narrowed her eyes in contrast. "Of course I will. Don't trouble yourself."

He put his other hand on her abdomen, but never lost his dreamy expression. "I wish things could have been different for us."

Natalia gulped. Mercifully, Severus emerged from the study and began to walk toward them. "I do too." She whispered before she turned her back on him and walked out the door. Severus followed directly behind her, but not before going eyeball to eyeball with Lucius and addressing him in a voice that evoked the slow pour of black molasses, "Stay away from her... or you'll have me to deal with... again. Next time... it will cost you far more... than a few... galleons."

"What did he want to see you about?" Natalia asked in hushed tones the moment they were safe on school grounds.

"Just business. Come on. We have to get back." Severus grabbed her hand and pulled her along.

"What kind of business?" Natalia was terrified it might concern something more sinister.

"He wants me to come to work for him after I leave Hogwarts." Severus remarked quickly, still pulling her up the hill.

"Doing what?" Natalia didn't like the sound of this. It could be some sort of ambush or trap.

"He wasn't specific. He just said he wants aggressive talent."

"But what about your plans? I thought you wanted to apprentice with Slughorn, and maybe intern at St. Mungos."

"Bother potions!" Severus snapped and turned to glare at her. "Did you see that place?" When she didn't answer, he began trudging up the hill again. "Do you see the way they live? That study, with the massive library, the marble steps, the gardens...I'm sick to death of wallowing in poverty! I want the options that wealth affords." He was loud and angry.

It disgusted Natalia to hear him so eager to sell out. "Are you planning on abusing people for your own amusement, and they buying their silence when it becomes cumbersome?"

This seemed to snap him out of his fantasy. He turned to her again and this time his face was much kinder. "You know I would never do that."

She knew he had a good heart. How else could she explain all he had done for her today? He was the best friend, the only friend she'd ever had and she regretted her harsh, judgmental words. She felt her lip begin to quiver and bit down on it while looking at her feet. "Oh," she could only sputter.

Severus, like most young men of his tender age and inexperience with women, was generally helpless when faced with a crying woman. He watched her shoulders shake and he took an awkward step towards her. H moved to put his arms around her, but hesitated. Then he embraced her and pulled his school cloak over her shoulders to protect her from the chill of the night air. He stood there with her, searching for the proper words. "Natalia, listen to me. You have a tough road ahead, but you now have fifty thousand in the bank, and a ferocious work ethic. It's going to be rough, especially when people find out about the baby but you'll be fine in the long run. You're a survivor, just like me. One day these people will be crawling to us, not the other way around. I'll help you through this."

"Oh, Merlin Severus!" She growled, trying to pull herself together. "How did I get myself into this?"

"You didn't. You've done nothing wrong. Come on." He kissed her forehead gently, like a brother. "We can't undo what's been done. You're a tough girl. One day Lucius will be sorry."

"Thank you Severus." Without thinking about it, but with pure, grateful emotion, she stood on her tiptoes and kissed his lips. She didn't mean anything by it, but when she pulled away he looked mildly horrified. He stared at her for a moment before speaking. "Come on." He began walking toward the castle but this time did not take her hand.

Igor watched from the crow's nest of the Durmstrang ship. Oblonsky insisted each boy pull a guard duty shift, although what they were guarding against remained a mystery. Occasionally he would see something interesting, and the couple sneaking back into Hogwarts after hours certainly fit that category. He lifted the binoculars to his eyes and tapped them with this wand until the couple came into focus. The girl resembled Natalia, but he couldn't be sure. He leaned over the edge of the crow's nest and tapped them again to zoom in just in time to see Natalia lean in to kiss Severus Snape on the lips. He was so shocked that the expensive binoculars slipped out of his hands and fell through the air. In a panic, he fumbled to grasp his wand, aimed it, and cast the spell. "Arresto momentum." He kept his wand steady, and gently brought the binoculars safely back into his hands. When he looked through them again, the couple was gone. He growled and slumped down on the tiny bench that was far too small for his large frame.

Natalia preferred Severus to him, and they were keeping it a secret. Her relationship, or whatever it was she had had with Lucius years ago, had also been a clandestine affair. Why? Were they ashamed of her? Perhaps she was ashamed of them. She should be in his opinion. Both were weasly little bastards and poor choices that would always disappoint her. Still, Severus was out enjoying the moonlight with her, and here he was all alone in a crow's nest, his only kicks coming from pathetic voyeurism. Hogwarts sucked.

Natalia muddled through many weeks of morning sickness, tender swollen breasts and complete exhaustion. Her marks became negatively affected, as every time she sat down to study, she fell asleep. Staying awake in class was also a challenge and when she fell asleep in Transfiguration class for the second time in a week, Professor McGonagall reported her to the Headmaster.

She was summoned to his office and he asked her the usual questions: What was wrong? How could he help? Was she ill? When he suggested a physical examination by Poppy, she panicked. Knowing an examination would surely reveal her condition, she vehemently denied illness, and blamed her busy work schedule. .

Dumbledore peered over his half-moon glasses at her in a disapproving manner. She was never sure if he believed her or not. "I'll not have such a bright young mind wasted. Your schoolwork is more important than all these trivial occupations. I'm very sorry, but I'll have to revoke your permission to work off campus. It's for your own good."

Normally she would have been irate at the loss of income, but she now had a large financial cushion, courtesy of Mr. Malfoy, so she made no protest. "Yes sir," she mumbled and made a hasty retreat.

Even without her job at The Three Broomsticks, she was exhausted by the last week in November. Her body was obviously using all its resources to create another human being inside of her, which meant the grim reality was never far from her mind.

The first task of the Tri-Wizard Tournament was to be that weekend, and the students were abuzz with excitement. Natalia hadn't seen Igor in weeks. Rumor had it that Oblonsky was keeping a close eye on him, not letting him out of his sight. She longed for a glimpse of him. What would he do if he had a girl in a similar situation? Her gut told her he would be far more honorable than Lucius.

The evening before the tournament she was in the library, her mind wandered to thoughts of Igor while she was attempting to write an essay. The library was surprisingly empty that evening when the librarian hustled over to her worktable. "Poppy needs you in the infirmary right away," she whispered.

Natalia had never been summoned for an emergency, and knew it must be bad. Hastily, she collected her belongings and rushed to see what Poppy needed. She entered the infirmary expecting to see Poppy, only to find it full of students. There were at least sixty from all houses and the visiting schools; at least half were Durmstrang boys. "Merlin's nightgown!" She exclaimed. All were clinging desperately to buckets, wastebaskets, spittoons or some other receptacle. They were all vomiting, wiping their mouth after vomiting, or looking as if they were about to vomit. "What's happened?"

"Potter and Black." Severus spat while passing by with a big tray of potions. "Apparently Durmstrang had a pre-tournament party and there was a large tray of sweets spiked with a bad batch of puking pestles. It's obviously an attempt at taking out Karkaroff before the first task."

"Oh my word!" Natalia gasped. She had no idea Potter was so desperate to win. "Has Potter been disqualified?"

"No proof. But I know it was him."

"Of course you do." Natalia muttered under her breath. Severus always assumed the worst of Potter and the other Gryffindor students.

"What was that?"

"What can I do?" She recovered easily.

"Here!" He shoved the tray into her hands. "Everyone needs this remedy and several hours rest."

"Alright." She took a step into the room but was nearly knocked over by the stench. "Ugh!" She turned away and tried to bury her mouth and nose on the shoulder of her robes.

"Ah yes," Severus whipped out a pot from his cape and opened it. "Smear this across your upper lip, it will mask the smell. Then get to work. I can't do everything for Poppy."

She did as ordered, and then took the tray over to the area of the infirmary where all the Durmstrang boys were seemingly unattended. She handed each of them a vial and made sure they lay down and were comfortable. She vanished the vomit and tried to have them drink some water when they were able. Thankfully, Igor was not in the mix. She raced about the room, tending to people as needed, but always returned to the foreign boys whom no one else seemed to be taking an interest in. After four or five hours of frantic treatment by Poppy and her helpers, the patients started to settle down and Poppy lowered the lights so they could sleep.

Natalia then went back to each of the boys in her section to offer more personal care, fluffing pillows, wiping vomit off chins, and checking for fevers that could be a rare but dangerous after affect. She noticed Levin laying on a cot by a window that had been opened in an attempt to air out the room. He was shivering. She walked over and shut the window, wanting to care for those Igor cared for. She picked up a pitcher on the table next to him and poured him a cup of water.

"Here Levin. Let's sit up." She put a hand behind his back and eased him up. "Take a drink of water, we have to rehydrate you." She held the cup for him, while he took a long drink. He moved his lips away, but reached for the cup and took an even longer drink. She took the opportunity to fluff his pillow.

"Don't drink too much." She gently took the cup away from him and eased him back down. "Can't have it coming right back up again." He watched her while she vanished the vomit in the can beside him. Then she placed a cool damp cloth on his forehead and tucked a warm blanket around him. "Are you comfortable?"

"Da!" He breathed. She assumed that meant yes. She sat on the side of his bed for a moment, and couldn't resist asking about his friend.

"Did Igor fall ill as well? I didn't see him."

"No. Oblonsky has him on a strict health regimen, no parties or sweets, so he was not with us. Karkaroff has to be the picture of wizarding perfection if he wants to be successful tomorrow."

"Oh good." She sighed with relief. "I'm sure he'll win." She fussed with the blanket again.

"You're not for the Hogwarts champion then?"

"No. I'm an independent thinker." She smiled at Levin who returned the expression.

"You are a nice girl Natalia. No wonder Iggy likes you."

She blushed and ignored his comment. He was surely talking out of his head.

"Why don't you like him?"

"I like him fine." She shrugged while refilling his water glass.

"You've been kind of mean to him this year."

"He's been kind of an arse this year." She quipped.

Levin laughed weakly. "Well, I'll give you that. He's really not though."

"I'll take your word for it. Excuse me." Natalia quickly extracted herself and went to Poppy's office. She must have gotten up too quickly, for the room seemed to shift and she nearly lost her balance. She recovered though and continued to see Poppy, who was brewing a massive amount of potions; presumably to replenish her vastly depleted stock.

"What else needs done Poppy?" Natalia yawned and put her hands on her aching back arching it like a cat getting a good stretch.

"Oh Miss Smith. I thought you'd gone with the rest of my help. Thank goodness. Go check on those Hufflepuffs and make sure they drink water. They have such weak constitutions."

"Alright," she sighed, feeling weak herself.

"Then back to those Durmstrang boys. I want a complete list of names for Oblonsky so I can bill him back for our time and resources. He's been no help at all today."

"Yes ma'am."

"Then do the same with those high maintenance French girls. Although Maxine has been quite attentive. We'll only bill them for the potions."

"Okay." Natalia began to feel dizzy again and leaned against the wall.

"Once everyone is asleep, you and I will start sanitizing all these pots."

The thought of cleaning the vomit pots again made her break into a cold sweat. Her head began to spin and before she knew it, everything went black.

AN: Something for you while you are hopefully enjoying a holiday break! I must confess I can not take credit for the description of Snape's voice. It was in a NYT review of Alan Rickman's new play. Thought it was too awesome not to "retweet".


	23. Chapter 23 Escape

CHAPTER TWENTY-THREE

Escape

"Natalia wake up."

The morning sun felt warm and comforting on Natalia's face, but when she opened her eyes the light stung and she squeezed them shut again.

"Oh I'm sorry, that's too bright." Natalia recognized the firm but loving voice as Poppy's. "Let me draw the shade." She heard the shuffle of the shade as Poppy made adjustments to the lighting. "There, let's try again. Can you open your eyes for me now?"

Natalia tried again. This time the room was dim and she could easily tolerate the minimal light. She looked around to find herself in the infirmary, but had no idea why she had slept there the night before. She attempted to sit up, but pain burned in her lower abdomen immediately she fell back onto the pillow. She turned to immerse her face in the pillow in order to cover her mouth and mask the expression of pain as her eyes darted around the room. Judging from the light it was mid-afternoon. A sinking feeling began deep inside her, although she could not pinpoint why. Certainly something was not right. She looked about for other students but she was not in the common infirmary room with the other students. No, this was Poppy's office.

"Do you remember anything?" Poppy asked gently.

"I remember taking care of all the students." Natalia mumbled. "The ones that ate the puking pestle."

"That's right. What else?"

"Levin, that boy from Durmstrang." She recalled her easy conversation with Igor's friend as one of the last pieces of the puzzle. "I was giving him some water."

"What else?" Poppy seemed to coax her.

Natalia thought for a moment. "I'm afraid that's all I remember."

"You've had a miscarriage Natalia." Poppy's words were plainly spoken but for a moment, incomprehensible.

Could this be true? Natalia didn't know whether to rejoice or cry. Her mind raced through a myriad of scenarios, and immediately focused on the worst possible. If Poppy knew she was pregnant, even if she was no longer pregnant, she would get booted out of school for sure. Deny. Deny. Deny.

"I'm sure I don't know what you're talking about." She replied, a little to dramatically.

"No?" Poppy raised her eyebrows mockingly. "You didn't know you were even pregnant then?"

"You're mistaken." Natalia shook her head violently. "I have very heavy...Well sometimes it makes me light-headed and..."

"Stop." Poppy cut off her sputtering excuses. "Just stop. Natalia, I am not stupid, and you are not the first girl at Hogwarts to find herself in a pickle."

Natalia merely gaped at her. She was completely unprepared for this conversation and found herself at a disadvantage.

"I'm not a fool" Poppy's tone was stern. "I'm a trained healing professional and you had a miscarriage. You passed out in my office obviously from overwork and when I went to tend to you, there was blood everywhere. When I examined you, well it looked like you were probably two to three months along. Is that correct?"

Natalia didn't answer. She was searching for a way out. No one must know. She made a vow not to tell. It wasn't some girlish secret. Her very life depended on it.

"You don't have to confirm it. I already know. More importantly, who was the father?" Poppy stood over her, crossed her arms and waited for and answer.

Again Natalia could not respond, not that she would have if not bound by the vow. Who would admit to Lucius being the father of their bastard child? She didn't look at Poppy.

"Well I'm sure he'll be relieved as I assume you are." Poppy poured a glass of water and handed it to Natalia.

Natalia took a couple of sips from the glass as her mind raced. "Are you going to tell Professor Dumbledore?"

"I am not. However I must warn you to be more careful. When you're a little better, I'll teach you the contraceptive spell so you don't have this issue again."

"You'll teach me that?" Natalia gaped at her. The very suggestion of sexual instruction at Hogwarts was scandalous.

"Yes, but it must remain a secret. The Ministry certainly wouldn't approve of my educating students in matters of sex. I'd be sacked for sure. But we girls have to stick together. It's the seventies, not the dark ages, and it's about time we took advantage of the few liberties we have. You lay back and rest. If anyone asks I'll tell them I needed your help with inventory. You can go back to your dormitory after supper tonight, but you'll have to take it easy for a few days." Poppy patted her leg and left the room leaving Natalia alone to process it all.

Her nightmare was over. Now she would no longer be connected to Lucius or his family. She would not have to deliver his child nor shoulder the burden of keeping the identity secret. It was too good to be true. She was finally free of him. After years of his torment she was finally free. Then she remembered the money. Not only was she free of Lucius, she was free of poverty. She had a safety net in Gringotts that she no longer needed to save for a child. She could spend it as she saw fit. She could attend university after school. She smiled to herself and kicked her feet under the covers with glee until a shooting pain in her groin reminded her that she had a bit over recovery to do. No matter, she was strong and otherwise healthy. She would be back on her feet in no time. To top it all off, Poppy ordered bed rest for a day. A whole day in bed was a luxury she'd never experienced. She rolled over and closed her eyes. Eventually she drifted off into a blissful but dreamless sleep.

Igor was outwardly cocky before the first task. It was a poorly kept secret that the first task involved flight, his strongest skill. Inwardly he was feeling isolated and terrified. The pressure to win was enormous, particularly from Oblonsky who kept him away from his friends for the last two weeks. He was even moved out of his quarters that he shared with Levin and placed in a private room next to his Headmaster. Presumably, he suspected Igor might try to sneak away. The two of them had done nothing but plot and strategize and train for the task. Would it be enough today? His body was tired and his mind was frazzled and the task hadn't even begun.

He was a bundle of nervous energy pacing back and forth in the holding tent. He spoke to neither of the other champions finding Potter detestable and Fifi nothing more than an overrated tart. She stood in one corner of the tent examining herself in her compact mirror. She turned first one cheek and then the other but struggled to see her whole self in the mirror. In frustration, she tapped her wand to the mirror and transfigured it into a full length mirror. She took a step back and smiled as she examined her reflection. She turned to one side which allowed Igor a better assessment of the size of her rather large breasts. They weren't bad in his opinion. Perhaps they were even better out of clothing. She caught him staring at her in the reflection and winked. He merely rolled his eyes and walked over to the other corner of the room.

There was a rickety chair, which he seated himself in. Unconsciously one knee bounced for lack of something better to do. Igor drummed his fingers on his other knee and looked about the room, avoiding Fifi. Potter lounged carelessly on a stack of cushions in another corner shooting sparks out of his wand and seemingly unconcerned with the task they were about to face. How could they be so outwardly calm at such a time? Better yet, why couldn't Igor seem to keep his nerves in check? Was there something wrong with him? He was beginning to feel inferior. Perhaps they knew something he didn't. Potter caught his eye and smirked. Igor narrowed his eyes, jumped up and became pacing again, his hand was shaking. Mercifully, the booming voice of Dumbledore came echoing through the air, and immediately they drew to the entrance for their introduction to the screaming crowds of spectators.

Severus searched all about the grounds for Natalia. When she wasn't at breakfast, he assumed she was still working in the infirmary and went to see if she needed help. She wasn't there however and Poppy informed him that she had just left. He returned to the common room thinking they could walk down to the quidditch pitch and watch the first task, but she never appeared. Finally he went alone, thinking he would see her there, but he did not. When the task was over, most of the students headed to Hogsmeade and he looked for her there but to no avail. He inquired about her to Madame Rosmerta but she hadn't seen her either. He was starting to worry. After dinner, he made a quick check of the potions lab and the library but she was not there. He returned to the common room and contemplated notifying a teacher of her missing whereabouts, but he didn't want to get her in trouble if she was sneaking out. Finally she appeared in the common room a couple hours before lights out.

"Where have you been?" He demanded. "I've been looking all over for you."

"Shh!" She grabbed his hand and pulled him away from the others in the room. "I have some news." She was unable to contain her smile and it was contagious. Severus found himself smiling and he rarely smiled. She pulled him gingerly over to a window seat that offered an underwater view of the black lake.

He noticed her wobbly gait. "Are you limping?"

"Shh! Just moving slowly. Sit down."

"Where were you all day?" Severus lowered his voice. He needn't have worried. No one cared enough about them to be interested in what they were saying to each other.

"I was in Poppy's office."

"Poppy's office? But she told me she hadn't seen you." He narrowed his eyes causing a deep crease between his eyebrows.

Natalia yanked his upper arm and pulled him close so she could whisper in his ear. "I had a miscarriage."

His eyes were wide when she pulled away. For a moment he didn't believe it but her wide grin and merry eyes confirmed it all. He leaned in and whispered, "Are you all right? How can you be sure?"

"I passed out in Poppy's office last night. She took care of me. I didn't tell her anything."

"Obviously," he drawled. "If you did you wouldn't be here."

"She examined me. She promised to keep it secret."

Severus struggled for the right words, unsure what was appropriate in such a situation. 'Congratulations,' hardly seemed in order but neither were condolences. "I'm sorry you had to go through such a thing but perhaps it is for the best."

"Ya think?" She quipped with a goofy expression.

Severus couldn't help but laugh. "Are you sure you're all right?"

Natalia's smile was weak but genuine. "I've certainly felt better and I'll be moving slow for a few days but yes, I'm fine. No, better than fine. This nightmare is over."

"Have you told Lucius?"

"No. Let him sweat."

Severus laughed softly again. "At least you're not bitter."

"Bother Lucius. Did you go to the first task? I'm so sorry I missed it."

"Don't be." Severus spat, his mood immediately going south.

"Who won?"

"That sanctimonious sack of shit Potter."

"Really?" Natalia was surprised. "What about Igor?"

"He finished last."

"Last? What happened?"

"So tell me what happened!" Natalia pressed Severus for information.

"Well the task was essentially a broom race."

"A broom race! How could he lose a broom race? He's the fastest thing I've ever seen! Potter thinks he's fast, but compared to Igor he flies at a snail's pace. Why the equipment alone would put anyone to shame."

"Are you going to let me tell this story or not?"

"Fine, go ahead."

"There was a course set-up that they had to find their way through. The first section was a gauntlet of cannonballs swinging back and forth in opposite directions suspended by these massive chains. One good whack would put you in the hospital for a week. Igor came out first and fast. Potter and Lafayette seemed to struggle but they made it out."

"Then what happened?"

"They flew out over the Black Lake. They couldn't go above a certain altitude and the merpeople were shooting out of the lake, nipping away at them. They bewitched the water and created waves and waterspouts to hinder them. Igor looked like he was taken by surprise, for they were able to slow him down a bit. When the other two saw him they went in more prepared. They flew towards the island at the far side of the lake. It was hard to see, but it looked to me like Igor was winning."

"And then what?"

"Of course we couldn't see. All I can say for certain is that when they came flying back, Potter was way out in front. After some time Lafayette came along and then finally Karkaroff. Lafayette looked a little worse for wear and Karkaroff, well let's just say he looked rather hacked off about something."

"Poor dear, he hates to lose, of course he was hacked off. What happened?"

"Rumor has it, they had to fly through another course on the island. Lafayette got hung up on something."

"Hung up?"

"Yes. Devil's Snare or something to that affect. Apparently she was in its grasp and being pulled under. Karkaroff heard her scream and turned around."

"Then what happened?"

"He blasted the plant, and pulled her out, even saved her broomstick."

"How wonderful." Natalia sighed dreamily.

"Not for him. Potter took the lead and rather than thanking him, Lafayette flew away and left him there. I'm told his broomstick was in jeopardy and that's what took so long."

"Poor Igor. He sacrificed a win to save her, how noble." Natalia gushed while Severus rolled his eyes.

"Idiot. They wouldn't have stopped to save him. Oblonsky was furious with him and rightly so. This is the Tri-Wizard Tournament not a garden party. Chivalry is dead as far as this contest goes. He's probably just trying to get into Lafayette's pants."

"Oh." Natalia chewed on her lip. "Does he like her?"

"Like, dislike, it has nothing to do with why he saved her. Moron. Oblonsky's had him working like a dog ever since and I'm sure he'll be paying the price for his foolishness for weeks."

"Oh, the poor dear. Was anyone able to prove Potter had something to do with the puking pestles?"

"No. But I'm still working on it. You look tired. You should get to bed."

"I think I will." Natalia yawned and rose to go back to her dorm.

"Natalia, I'm glad it's all working out for you."

"Thank you Severus."

Natalia climbed the stairs to her room and stretched out on the bed. What an unbelievable day. She was exhausted but unable to sleep. Igor must be distraught. He hated to lose and loathed for anyone to make a fool of him. Both had happened and in the most public way. She wondered if he was taking comfort in drink again. Or perhaps someone of the female persuasion was comforting him. Not likely after Fifi made a fool of him. He would probably be mad at all the women in the world at the moment. She hoped he was with Levin. From their brief conversation last night, she had decided that he was a good soul and a good friend to Igor. The more she thought about him, the more she worried and finally she could not resist writing to him, just one more time.

She labored for the next hour over her words of comfort. Would it help? She wondered if he took her letter to heart or if he merely tossed them on the fire as if it were a trivial fan letter. What did it really matter anyway? He would never know who she was, so she was free to speak from her heart. When she was finished she pulled on her warmest coat and dashed out to the owlery to send it off right away.

Igor stood shivering in the shadow of the ship as the sun began to set. After his epic failure that morning, Oblonsky sentenced him to the most tedious and demeaning job of all, blasting the barnacles of the massive underbelly of the ship. It was Igor's responsibility to pull the boat into dry dock, stabilize it and then conjure a water cannon with enough force to blast the parasites away. The water constantly sprayed back on him keeping him doused in a frosty mist all day while the December winds whipped off the lake. When Oblonsky came out to check his progress, he caught Igor using a shield and warming charm to protect himself from the cold. Furious, he threatened to add two weeks of all night sentry duty in the crow's nest. So now he was wet, numb with cold and a head full of frozen hair. He watched his classmates walk towards the ship after bidding good-bye to the Hogwarts students at the point where the path diverged. A group of Durmstrang boys called after some of the Hogwart's girls, but they merely giggled and ran up the hill. "Cockteasers." Igor muttered under his breath.

"How's it going Iggy?" Levin came striding up the hill.

"How do you think?" Igor spat back, in no mood for conversation.

"Looks like your almost done."

"No, I'm half done. I have the entire port side to do." He stopped for a moment to stretch his aching arms. The pressure from the canon was difficult to hold and maintain. It shook his shoulders violently, and would have surely been in even more pain if the hadn't been completely numb from cold.

"I'll help you finish." Levin suggested good-naturedly.

"No. If you're caught you'll be in trouble and I'll be in worse trouble. Go in for dinner. I'll be fine. Thank you for the offer."

Levin smiled sadly at his friend. "Alright."

Igor went round to the port side of the boat and sighed when he saw the mess he would have to deal with on that side. With a heavy sigh he began his work again. Two hours later, and in the pitch darkness, he was finally finished. Exhausted, he trudged up the gangplank and into the warmth of the ship. Before the contest that morning, he was too nervous to eat breakfast. After the contest he had no appetite and besides that Oblonsky was ripping into him with condemnation and threats of expulsion. He was starving when he entered the galley and would have eaten anything. Volga, the crusty old house elf was putting away pots and pans.

"Galley is closed." He gurgled.

"Please Volga, I was doing an assignment for Headmaster." Igor gulped.

"You know the rules. You're a half hour late. Breakfast starts at six."

Far too tired to argue and knowing it would do no good anyway, he shuffled down the hallway to Oblonsky's quarters. He hated to face Oblonsky's wrath again, but he had to have his assignment inspected. He took a deep breath before knocking on the door.

"Enter!" Oblonsky barked, and Igor knew he was in for it again. He entered with some trepidation and stood before his headmaster's desk before addressing him. "Go on boy. Why are you here?"

"I'm finished with the task you set me Headmaster. Would you like to come and inspect my work?"

"Already done. I was just outside where the hell were you?"

"I, uhm, well, I went to the galley to try and get dinner. I was too late."

"By a half hour. You know the rules. If you want to eat, get your work done."

"Yes, Headmaster."

"Sit down."

Igor would have rather taken a beating than the verbal beat down he was about to get. All he wanted was to crawl into his bed, but there was no way around this, and so he sat down in the hard wooden chair opposite Oblonsky's desk.

"I've been thinking about why you lost today and have a few theories. But I would like to hear what you think. Why did you lose today?"

"I...I don't know Headmaster." Igor hung his head in shame under his Headmaster's disapproval.

"Yes you do. Look at me!"

Igor snapped to attention.

"Why did you lose? Speak freely."

"I stopped to help Miss Lafayette. She became entangled in Devil's Snare. It was pulling her under."

"So what? You could have blasted her out of there and still won."

"I did blast her out. But then she was crying and holding her ankle. It looked bad so I went to help her."

"And when you did she pushed you aside and got a huge head start on you." Oblonsky was up now pacing across the floor with his hands behind his back. "Idiot! Your heart is your weakness you know. You have all the gifts and talent in the world but you get led around by your yaytsa by that bljad!"

In reality nothing could be further from the truth. Igor had no interest in Fifi and certainly wasn't letting her lead him around by his balls. She wasn't his type. But he adored women in general and when he saw her in distress, he was compelled to assist her. He knew however that explaining this to Oblonsky was futile and so he did not bother, but sat there in silence, enduring it.

"You cannot go easy on Lafayette because she's a woman. She obviously wouldn't do the same for you. You will not let that happen again. Do you understand me?"

"You want me to ignore the others if they are in danger?"

Oblonsky looked at him for a long time. "Your heart will be your undoing one day. Just like any other weakness, we must learn to compensate for it. We have to cover it up. Trust me my boy, women bring you nothing but misery." Oblonsky paced over to the large porthole and stared out at the lights of Hogsmeade. For a moment, he was lost in his thoughts. When he turned back to Igor, his voice was softer. "I am angry at your loss, particularly because you were duped by Lafayette, but you did the right thing. Durmstrang men take care of our women and if it hadn't resulted in a loss, I would be extolling the virtues of your chivalry." Igor remained silent, embarrassed now by the compliment. Oblonsky cleared his throat and continued. "However, today, your heart was a weakness. After today, if you see someone in trouble, even Potter, we will have a signal between us. You signal me and I will see to it that your competitors are tended to. Then you get Durmstrang the win."

"Yes Headmaster."

"Right. You're dismissed. Go to your quarters."

"Yes Headmaster." Igor rose and moved quickly to the door.

"I'll have a hot meal sent to your room."

Igor turned in amazement. Oblonsky was a notorious hard ass particularly about mealtimes. This was quite an indulgence considering Igor's lackluster performance today. "Thank you Headmaster."

Oblonsky was staring at the lights of Hogsmeade again and did not turn around. He merely raised a hand and waved Igor away.

Igor finally entered his room after what was most certainly the worst day of his entire life. As he crossed the room from the door to his bunk, he kicked off his boots, shrugged out of his coat, undid his belt and walked out of his trousers, reached behind his shoulders and pulled his shirt over his head, and leaving a trail of clothing in his wake, crawled into bed in nothing but his skivvies. He groaned when his head finally rested on the down pillow and soft sheets that his mother always packed for him. So thankful was he for these small comforts.

There was a rapping that startled him before he drifted off to sleep. It must be the house elf with some dinner. Truthfully he was now too tired to eat but he knew better than refuse Oblonsky's rare demonstration of generosity so he went to the door. No one was there. He looked up and down the hall but saw no one. He shut the door and then heard the rapping noise again. It was coming from the porthole. He peered through the glass to see a familiar, tiny little owl with its shoulders shuddering in the wind.

"Hallo again, little one." He practically sang as he opened the window. He extended his hand and the bird timidly stepped onto his fingers. He brought the bird into the room and studied him for a moment. "I think we've met before." He smiled for the first time in days. "I hope you're bringing me a letter from the same lovely author." The little bird bounced up and down seemingly excited. Igor snickered. "All right, hold still. Let me see what you've brought."

He removed the letter from the bird and looked at for some kind of identification but found none. He held it to his nose and inhaled. The fragrance was faint but unmistakable lavender. He wasted no more time in opening it.

Dearest Igor,

You're probably feeling very frustrated at the moment if I know you at all. You're terribly hard on yourself. But you have nothing to be ashamed of today. You lost, yes, but you lost with honor. Better to lose because you helped rescue someone else, than to win without caring for another's wellbeing. I'm quite proud of you. There are two more tasks that I'm confident you can win. But if you don't, you will live with the knowledge that you did your best and you can hold your head high.

I hear that someone may have tried to sabotage you yesterday, but they were foiled because you were living well and not out partying before the task. Keep doing what you are doing and eventually you will prevail. I have nothing but the best faith in you.

MM (ha)

P.S. Have I told you how handsome I think you are?

Igor giggled at the last line. She was flirting with him. This game was getting interesting and for a moment he forgot about the tournament. He held the letter to his face and inhaled again. Lavender, yes it was she. His pulse raced and he was ecstatic that he had the foresight to prevent the bird from flying away. The little owl wiggled in his grasp.

"Oh no, little one. You have another letter to deliver." He set the fluffy little owl down on his desk and took out his quill. Inspiration was over flowing from his soul but his response would be brief.

.~~~~~

Natalia was picking at some eggs and toast when the bird appeared at breakfast the following morning with a letter attached to his leg. She scooped him up and began to scold him. "You little stinker. Didn't you deliver my letter? The little bird bobbed up and down and tapped its talons on the table. "Alright. I'll get it off."

She removed it, expecting to find her letter, but was surprised to see it was a response. She quickly opened it, having no idea what to expect.

MM

I have to meet you. Please do me the honor of accompanying me to the Yule Ball.

Your servant,

IK

_AN: Oh Iggy, you're so forward! What will Natalia do? I know what I would do, but she's far more cautious than I am. And what about Oblonsky? Broken heart? Is that why he's such a bastard? Hmmmm._

_Hope all of you are having a Merry Christmas or enjoying another holiday of your choosing. We had a wonderful Christmas here. It wasn't a perfect year, but we have much to be thankful for._


	24. Chapter 24 Close to Me

CHAPTER TWENTY-FOUR

Close To Me

_AN: Does anyone remember the old __Cure song called Close to Me? It used to be one of my favorites and that's kind of what I had in my head while writing this. Check it out-it's a great song about anticipation. Thanks to those of you kind enough to review. You absolutely make my day!_

Although he waited with uncharacteristic neediness, Natalia did not answer Igor's letter with his invitation to the Yule Ball. He tore through any correspondence that arrived for him, only to be disappointed each time. Christmas cards from friends and family were angrily tossed aside and the care package from his mother with homemade Christmas cookies were passed off to his comrades without even being tasted by their intended recipient. They only served as a reminder of how detestable this place had become for him. Mercifully he would only be forced to endure a few more days of this hellhole before leaving for Russia on Christmas morning. He longed for the spacious grounds of his family's estate, for the company of his brothers as the hiked or flew through the forest in the mornings, for the attentions of his sisters who always considered him a pet, and for the unconditional love of his parents. He did not belong here. His place was with his family and it became more apparent every day.

Natalia fretted away the hours after receiving the response. She was certain Igor was not the one who responded to her letter. Romantic letters were something she was not used to. Things like that just didn't happen to her. To compound her misery, she then began to imagine other possible authors. What if someone else intercepted the letter and penned the response to her as a joke? It was possible. She considered of just asking him about it but the very idea was absurd. Not to mention, she couldn't think of a tactful way to address him. "Hello, I'm the stalker who's been writing to you for several years and yes I'd love to go to the ball." She was far too shy to even begin to consider doing such a thing. So she did nothing.

Nothing, that is, except fantasize of going to the ball on his arm. Even if she couldn't go to the ball with Igor, she still wanted to go. The Great Hall would certainly be beautifully adorned in a magical winter theme. She now had money in the bank for a dress, and it would be her last chance to attend a ball as a schoolgirl. It was a rite of passage that she wanted for herself. Still, she had no date. There was no way on earth she would humiliate herself by entering the ball alone. It would defeat the purpose of going entirely. Even if her dream date were out of the question, surely someone would go with her. Even the most unpopular of dates would be preferable to no escort at all. She began to consider who might be as unpopular as she, would have no date, and who may agree to attend with her, but not expect anything more. There was only one person who met her requirements.

Severus and Natalia were studying in the library and as usual, the last ones to leave. Natalia was glad to have a moment alone. She was itching to ask him about the idea she was turning over in her mind. She watched him study with his nose practically buried in his textbook. His greasy hair hung forward hiding the majority of his face but accentuating his rather prominent and unusually formed nose. She considered his appearance carefully. He was not classically handsome like Igor or Lucius; still there was something attractive about his face. When he was secure in himself, like now while studying or in the lab, his features would be arranged in a serene manner. It was only when he was away from the activities he enjoyed that worry and anger polluted his expression. Severus could be a very dear and kind friend, which only made his face more pleasing to her eyes. Though most did not see him in this light, and simply found his appearance distasteful. She could do far worse. She took a deep breath before plowing forward with her plan.

"Severus," she began softly, "you know the Yule Ball is coming up."

"So I've heard." He droned at her without looking up. He could be terribly obtuse in such matters and Natalia quickly realized he would not make this easy for her.

"Well, I've always wanted to go." She paused on the off chance he might pick up on what she wanted, and ask her himself. He, however, did not acknowledge her, and so she was forced to pose the embarrassing question herself. "I thought if you didn't have a date, maybe we could go together. Just as friends, I mean." The latter part could have probably remained unspoken but she added it so she wouldn't startle him too much. It would never do to have her dearest friend misread her.

"I'm already going with someone else." He didn't look up despite the shocking nature of his response.  
>This little factoid blew her away, and for a moment she could make no response. Curiosity soon got the better of her. "Really? With who?"<p>

He briefly looked up then cast his eyes back to his book. "Sasha Malfoy." He mumbled her name under his breath like he was embarrassed.

"What?" She yelped far too loud for the library and smacked her hand down on the table. "No way!" Immediately the librarian shushed her.

Severus glared at her. "Way." He deadpanned.

"You didn't tell me." She grinned and shoved his shoulder. "When did you ask her?" she demanded.

"I didn't. She asked me."

"No way!" She was immediately shushed yet again.

Severus looked at the librarian and then back at her before he responded in annoyance. "Way."

"That's great! I mean, she's a nice girl." She thought it was good to see him turning his attentions to someone other than Lily Evans for a change. And besides, Natalia was immediately feeling more charitable towards Sasha since she seemed to be interested in someone other than Igor. "I must say though, I'm surprised she's not going with Igor Karkaroff."

"He didn't ask her. I think she was rather put out."

"No way!" Sasha was the natural choice for him. They always attended social functions together.

"Way. Merlin's beard woman, you really must work on your conversation skills if you expect to find a date to anything." He snarled through his words obviously hating this conversation and wanting the focus off him and his date.

"Sorry. It's just wild though. I thought they were an item."

"Apparently not," Severus shrugged and went back to his book.

"So are the two of you…you know?"

He huffed and once again raised his eye to here with his deadpan expression, which was really starting to get on her nerves. "No." Once again his eyes dropped to the book.

Natalia started to have this sinking feeling that she was going to miss yet another ball. Nervously, she began to tap her quill on the parchment, peppering dots of ink along the margins.

Severus noticed and offered a mildly sarcastic suggestion. "Why don't you ask Karkaroff?" He leaned back in his chair and crossed his arms.

Now it was her turn to become engrossed in the history of wand making. "Phfft," was the only response she could muster. What a ridiculous suggestion.

"Why not?"

"Are you insane?"

"I am not. Ask him."

"Yeah right." She scoffed at the idea though it thrilled her just the same. "You want me to just walk up to Igor freaking Karkaroff and ask him to condescend to take me to the ball? Fat chance."

Severus rocked back in his chair and kept his attentions on his friend. "And why not?" His tone was patronizing, like that of a pompous professor.

"Because he'd laugh and I'd be humiliated. Because he's way too good for me." She rolled her eyes to the ceiling. "Because he doesn't even know I exist."

"You are exaggerating. I'm quite sure he knows you exist." Again his professor tone came out.

"Okay, well maybe he knows I exist, but he doesn't care." It was now her turn to avoid eye contact as she flipped through the pages in her own book pretending to search for some bit of information.

"I thought you were friends, or at least acquaintances. He always makes an attempt at socializing with you, even if his efforts are rather clumsy."

"That's a far cry from going to the ball together." She snapped, wanting to bring this excruciating conversation to a halt. "Really, it's no big deal. This certainly won't be the first or last ball I've missed."

"Well at least you have your pity party to attend." He smirked. He was never easy on her but she appreciated his wit and retaliated by crumbling up her parchment and throwing it at him. He laughed softly and they both gave the appearance of going back to their studies, though neither of them was able to concentrate.

For the next two weeks Natalia came back to her dormitory each night only to be subjected to the gleeful squeals and tedious giggles of her housemates as they shared stories about being asked to the ball. They discussed the boys they were going with, the ensembles they would wear, and who liked whom. It only served as a painful reminder to Natalia of her negative social status.

One week prior to the ball, Poppy assigned Natalia to be the attending healer's assistant at an exhibition quidditch match between an invitation-only Hogwarts team and Durmstrang. All the best players from each house team were chosen and competed against Igor and his teammates. It was Dumbledore and Hooch's attempt to try and unify the four houses that frequently sniped at one another over anything and nothing. Sadly for Hogwarts, it turned out to be a dismal failure. Sirius and Regulus, despite similar styles and years of practice together, could not seem to put their rivalry aside long enough to work together. Potter was too much of an arrogant showoff for anyone to want to work well with him. And the Hufflepuff and Ravenclaw delegates were dismissed as incompetent by the other three, even though they were just as good as the so called super stars.

Igor, Levin, and the other Durmstrang players worked seamlessly together, as always, and easily handled the Hogwarts team whose true opponents were their own massive egos. Igor did not notice her. He was very focused on the game, presumably because it had been so long since he'd been permitted to play in a match. He was being prepared for the tournament morning, noon, and night. It seemed to be zapping the joy out of life for him, as she witnessed none of the flamboyant taunting for which he was so well known. The crowd was not treated to his usual trickery on the pitch, no fancy spinouts, or shouts at the crowd to get them going. The match was short, as Igor wasted no time catching the snitch and then flying over to Natalia to hand it back to her without so much as cheeky comment or even a victory lap.

She watched him with great interest and concern for his reserved behavior. It was so unlike him not to express joy after a win. She observed him on the pitch chatting with Regulus after the match for some time. Their acquaintance seemed to endure despite their being in constant competition. Each seemed to have a high level of respect for the other. After most of the crowds were gone, Igor finally shook hands with Regulus and walked gracefully off the field. Despite his reserve, he wore a blissful smile and had a relaxed stride. His moment of relaxation however was brought to an abrupt halt as Oblonsky confronted him on the sideline and immediately started in on him.

Natalia was on the sidelines, packing up the quidditch equipment and having some trouble securing the very temperamental snitch. She swiped hopelessly at it as it dodged about; teasing her and making her feel foolish in general. She strained to hear Oblonsky but missed the first part of the conversation. As they drew closer however, she realized what they were saying.

"What do you mean you're not taking anyone?" Oblonsky was already red faced and Igor was looking at his feet. "You're the Tri-Wizard Champion! You can't just go alone. You'll bring shame on our school."

Igor sighed. "There was only one girl I wanted to go with and she won't go with me. I've no interest in anyone else."

That comment made Natalia's heart race. Could he mean her? Did he really write the letter? Was he disappointed? Oh how she regretted not answering. He was worth the risk and she was a fool. How could she have been so timid as to let this opportunity of a lifetime slip away?

"I don't give a hippogriff's ass who you're interested in. You have to have a partner for the opening dance. I'll not have our school look like impotent tulips in front of the others, and even the minister. How can you be so talented and focused one day, and such a complete incompetent other days?" Igor hung his head in shame under his Headmaster's admonishment. "You find someone tonight before sundown or you'll be swabbing the decks for the rest of the year."

"I'm sure everyone has dates by now."

"What about that little Malfoy tart?" Oblonsky was so angry he spat upon the ground. "I thought you had her locked up."

It shocked Natalia to hear a teacher, a headmaster no less refer to a student as a tart. Sasha was rather flamboyant but a tart she was not. Oblonsky was way out of line.

"She's going with someone else." Igor mumbled

"Merlin! You are worthless! I have to do everything for you. You!" He turned to Natalia who was the only girl in sight at the moment and she froze in horror. "Who are you going to the ball with?" It sounded more like an accusation than a question.

She swallowed hard and didn't dare look at Igor. "I'm not going." Her voice was barely audible.

"Well you are now. You're going with Master Karkaroff. Put on some makeup and try to look like a girl. See?" He glared at Igor. "It's as simple as that. Idiot!" He hissed as he swept off the field.

Natalia's cheeks burned at this insult, made more humiliating by Igor's presence. She turned her focus back to the snitch; just wanting to catch is and get the hell out of this nightmare.

Igor was twice as embarrassed as she. His situation was ridiculous enough but when amplified by such an asinine Headmaster, it was nearly unbearable. They were both silent for a long time, while he tried to think of something gentlemanly to say to make her feel better. Finally he did, but didn't have the guts to look at her.

"I'm sorry Natalia." He continued to look down while slowly shaking his head. "Please don't feel obligated to go with me." He raised only his eyes to find her still busying herself with the quidditch equipment. "I know you don't care for me. I'm sure I'm probably the last person you would want to go with."

She continued to occupy herself with the contemptible snitch and did not look at him either. "It's okay. I know you wanted to go with Sasha." Although she tried to sound nonchalant, her voice caught when she uttered her rival's name. "It's up to you if you want to take me or not but don't let that disagreeable man intimidate you. He has no right to speak to you like that." She watched the snitch carefully, trying to lull it into a sense of complacency so she could grab it. When it became still, she reached out for it again, only to have it pull away. She lost her balance and fell over the equipment case. This situation just kept getting worse.

One corner of his mouth turned up in a thoughtful, yet melancholy smile. Gallantly he stepped over to the snitch and with effortless grace, snatched it out of the air. "Here." He handed it to her.

"Thank you." She mumbled while taking great care to place it back in case before it escaped again.

Igor watched her struggle, still grinning though she didn't see him. "You're a sweet girl Natalia." He sighed heavily. "I should have asked you first. Would you do me the honor of allowing me to escort you to the Yule Ball?"

"It is I who would be honored."

Her sweet and well-mannered reply warmed his heart. "Wonderful. I'll come by Slytherin House at six. Be ready for me." He made a slight, yet formal bow before turning to walk back to the ship.

Be ready for him. How could any girl possibly be ready for someone as charismatic and handsome as he? Especially someone like Natalia. Immediately she began to fret. Other girls complained all the time that they had nothing to wear, but she quite literally had nothing suitable. One thing she did have however was funds. Although she had wanted to save the money from Lucius' father for her education, this was the chance of a lifetime and well worth the investment. She was however uneducated in all matters of style and terrified she would pick out something inappropriate or out of style. That would never do as he was considered the epitome of style in the youthful wizarding world. Witch Weekly had even mentioned him in their Best Dressed At The World Cup After party article. To make matters worse, she didn't have much time and would have to begin shopping at the first available opportunity.

Then there was the issue of her hair. It had grown quickly since she hacked it all off in a fit of anger after world cup, but now it was in a very unmanageable in-between stage of growing out. She began paying more attention to what other girls were doing with their hair. Not to mention their nails, mannerisms, and the way they walked. She so wanted to make a good impression on Igor and let him see there was more to her than just waitressing and quidditch strategy. So preoccupied was she with the impending date with Igor, that she began to forget about other things in her life that generally consumed her.

Severus noticed that her preoccupation. He began to confirm things with her that would never have required mentioning twice before. While they were working in potions class one day he finished first as always, and used his extra time to review their schedule. "Are you meeting me in the lab tomorrow morning? We have to get a jump on that project for next term, even if it is Christmas Eve."

"Mmm?" She glanced up from the potion she was stirring mindlessly. She had completely forgotten about the lab and the project. "Oh...ahh. Afraid not. I have to go to Hogsmeade."

"Whatever for?" He snarled in annoyance, loathing any change in his plans. "I thought you were through with that job."

"I am, but I have to find a dress for the Yule Ball." She whispered.

"Yule Ball? I thought you weren't going. Are you going alone or with someone?"

"I have a…date." She mumbled, not wanting anyone to hear.

From her position across the table, Sasha's ears perked up. She seemed to have gossip radar and never missed a juicy tidbit. "Really? Who?" She leaned closer to Natalia eager for the scoop.

Natalia was hesitant, unsure what Sasha's reaction would be. Although Sasha was attending the ball with Severus, she might still care for Igor. Natalia didn't particularly care if she became friends with Sasha, but she certainly didn't need her as an enemy. Briefly she considered lying but Sasha would find out eventually. Best to get it over with. "Igor Karkaroff."

Sasha squealed with delight, ran around the table and hugged Natalia. "Yea! That's wonderful!"

Severus jumped at the sudden outburst, and then began peering into Natalia's potion while furrowing his brow.

Sasha pulled back and watched Severus for a moment, assessing his reaction before she pounced on Natalia. "Can I help you shop? I love to dress shop and I know the perfect color for you!"

"Uhm, okay." Natalia furrowed her brow, confused by this reaction. She wasn't used to such girly outbursts. "You're not angry?"

"No! Heavens no! I'm thrilled for you both. Iggy's loads of fun. You'll have a wonderful time. I should warn you though; he can be all hands, so you're better off putting him in line right from the start." She gave a conspiratorial giggle.

This thought put a chill into Natalia's bones. Igor was the young man she'd dreamed about forever, but how would she handle him if he became aggressive? Stomach curdling memories of Lucius crept back into her mind. Would Igor be that way? Would he force her to do things to him? Would he be cold, and brutal? Surely not, but what would she do if he did? She'd never even kissed anyone besides Lucius and that was complicated. Unbeknownst to her, her eyes were wide with worry and betrayed her concern.

"Hey, I'm just kidding Natalia." Sasha put her hand on Natalia's for emphasis. "Igor may test your limits, but he's not a cad. He would never try anything…unless you wanted him to." She raised her eyebrows having no idea the terror her friend was feeling.

"Sorry," Natalia muttered. "I guess I'm just a little nervous. This is my first date."

"Well," Sasha shrugged, "first dates can be awkward, but Igor is so much fun and an excellent conversationalist, he'll put you right at ease, not like some other guys that try to keep you guessing all the time." She shot a look at Severus who remained oblivious.

"I mean this is my first date ever."

"Ever?" Sasha raised her eyebrows in disbelief.

"Ever." She wouldn't call her molestations by Lucius dates. The one time he did ask her out, he stood her up, on her birthday no less.

"Oh," Sasha looked at Severus and sighed. Natalia could swear she detected some kind of relief. "Well don't be nervous. It will all be great. Severus and I will be there, and we can all sit together. Won't that be fun Severus?"

Severus grunted, but otherwise remained engrossed in other people's potions, comparing them to his own. Sasha frowned and then turned back to Natalia. "If you want, I can do your hair too?"

Natalia was embarrassed. Her inky mop was hopeless, much like Severus' hair. Perhaps this whole venture was hopeless.

"I don't know." Natalia fumbled for an excuse. Sasha could be so suffocating and the more distance between she and the Malfoy family, the better.

"Pleeeease?" Sasha smiled hopefully.

Natalia sighed. She really had no other plan of action and Sasha was generally acknowledged to be the master of all things fashionable and alluring to boys. "All right then."

"Yeaaaa!" Sasha clapped her hands together. "Meet me in the courtyard at nine and we'll get an early start before the stores get crowded.

As planned the girls met in the courtyard the following morning and headed to town. It was already starting to snow, which brought a certain quiet to the grounds. That is, it would have been quiet if Sasha hadn't been chattering away. Still, the walk was calming to Natalia who had been a nervous wreck since accepting Igor's invitation. And she knew she was in fashionable hands with Sasha. As they entered town, Natalia turned right to head toward the second hand shop that she was all too familiar with.

Sasha remained in the middle of the path. "Where are you going?"

"The second hand store."

"The what?" Sasha laughed as if she'd just heard a joke. "Are you kidding? This is the Yule Ball and you're going with Karkaroff. You can't show up in some second hand rag."

"Yes, but I'm on a limited budget." She really wasn't today, but the fancier stores with their snotty sales witches intimidated her. She was comfortable in the second hand shop where the sale clerks didn't judge her and the other students were never present to laugh at her choices.

"It's Christmas Eve. You won't believe the sales that are going on. Besides that I'm an excellent negotiator. We'll get you a good price, trust me." Sasha grabbed her by the hand and pulled her along. She dragged her to a fussy looking establishment with a flouncy black and white awning blowing in the breeze and overdone boxwood topiaries flanking the front door.

Sasha breezed into the expensive dress shop like she owned it, with Natalia in tow. "Oh, good morning Deliah," she was on a first name basis with the dour middle-aged witch who owned the store. Deliah snapped to attention the moment they entered. "We'd like to see some evening robes. No rubbish, just the good stuff, not too conservative, and don't show us anything that another witch is already wearing to the Yule Ball. If either of us show up in the same outfit, mother will be furious."

"Certainly, Miss Malfoy." Deliah went scurrying away into the back.

"Well that was impressive." Natalia couldn't help but giggle. Deliah was part of the reason she never came into this store even to look. She was one of the most difficult customers in The Three Broomsticks and Natalia loathed having her at one of her tables.

"Ugh!" Sasha began to look at some dresses on the rack seemingly unconcerned. "That woman is a piece of work. You should hear the way she speaks to her staff. Abominable! I like to give her a dose of her own medicine. Father is paying the very large bill so she has to put up with it." Sasha winked at her, and then turned her attention back on Deliah who was emerging from the back with an armload of possibilities.

Natalia thought they were all lovely but Sasha began to sort through them. "Last season. Last season." She proclaimed tossing two dresses on the floor. "Too conservative, too ugly, cheap material," three more dresses hit the floor while Deliah watched in horror. "Deliah what is this? I'd expect better from the finest store in town!"

"Miss Malfoy, it's the day of the ball. I apologize but my best gowns have already been purchased. The only ones I have left are these, and a few cocktail dresses that wouldn't be appropriate."

"I'll be the judge of that. Fetch them." Sasha gestured towards the back room and Deliah made haste to go back for another load.

Natalia giggled and had to turn away.

"You can't let people intimidate you, Nat. Especially pompous little toadies like that witch. We're just as good as she is aren't we?"

Natalia didn't get an opportunity to answer as Deliah came back out with two more dresses. They were similar but not identical. Both were short, above the knee.

"You see Miss Malfoy. They are short dresses more suitable for an intimate gathering rather than a formal ball."

"We'll try them on. Natalia which one do you like better? The dark green would look better with your coloring but the green and blue one will make your boobs look bigger. Your call."

"Uhm...I'll try the green and blue one."

"Ha!" Sasha giggled. "Good choice. I like the other one anyway. Follow me."

Natalia followed her to the fitting rooms in the corner of the store. Once in the fitting room, she ran her fingers over the fine silk bodice adorned with sequins here and there. The skirt was blue and green jewel toned tulle fabric that flounced out and stopped just short of her knees. It really wasn't something she would have ever chosen but decided that Sasha probably knew best. After all, she had attracted Igor's eye in the past, so he must like this kind of look.

"Come on out Nat! Let's see!" Sasha called to her from outside the room. "I don't know about you, but I like mine."

"Just a minute." Natalia quickly undressed and slipped the dress over her head. She fumbled for the zipper in the back but could only get it zipped up halfway before she couldn't reach any further.

"Come on." Sasha cried impatiently. "We're on a schedule here. Do you need help with the zipper?"

"Uhm, yes."

Sasha whipped the privacy curtain aside and entered the fitting room to assist. "Suck in!"

"What?" Natalia had no idea what she was talking about.

"You heard me, suck in so I can get this thing zipped."

"Oh." Obediently, she drew breath and pulled her stomach in.

"There." Sasha had the zipper up with little trouble. "Turn around, let's have a look, shall we?"

Natalia turned slowly, unsure what she looked like.

"Oh wow!" Sasha's jaw dropped. "Yeah, that's the dress."

"Do I look okay?"

"Ha! Better than okay. Come see!" Sasha dragged her over to the three-way mirror.

Natalia barely recognized herself. Since the unfortunate incident at World Cup, she had taken to dressing in a drab manner again, but even before that, this would have been over the top. The strapless neckline kept her technically covered but there was a plunging v in the middle that was rather daring. Her legs actually looked pretty good, but she knew even with her limited experience that wearing a short dress to the Yule Ball simply was not done.

"Well take it." Sasha barked at Deliah. "Both of them." Natalia looked briefly at Sasha, a vision as always but at the moment dressed to kill in a dark green velvet dress that also showed quite a bit of leg.

"But it's short." Natalia was fretting as always. "Don't all the other girls wear long dresses? Ball gowns? I don't want everyone looking at me."

"You want Iggy looking at you don't you?"

Natalia blushed. "Well, yes, but..."  
>"No but's. You're not just going with anyone you know. You're going with the Durmstrang Tri-Wizard Champion and international quidditch star. He's used to beautiful women draping themselves all over him like cheap robes. You have to stand out. You know. You have to make an impression."<p>

Natalia was already shaking her head at the idea and nearly ready to back out. "I can't be the only one in a short dress. People with think I chose poorly. I'll look like I don't belong."

"Of course you belong. He asked you didn't he?"

"Well, kind of. Yes. Yes he did."

"Look if you're nervous about it, I'll wear a short dress too. I'd already had one picked out but I kind of like this one. We will look so hot and all the other girls will be barking mad they didn't think of it first when they catch their dates checking out our legs."

"Oh my heavens." Natalia slumped down on a lumpy pink chair with a thump.

"You've got to get over this!" Sasha jerked her right back off the chair and shoved her in front of the mirror. "Look at yourself! You look beautiful." She put her hands on Natalia's arms and rested her chin on her shoulder. "He's going to fall in love with you I promise!  
>That was all she needed to hear. She had the best source possible on such matters and decided to trust her. "Alright, but only if you wear one too."<p>

"I will. Deliah, fetch us some shoes and stockings and be quick about it." Sasha winked at her new friend. "After this we'll head back to the castle and start working on our hair."

After trying on what seemed like two dozen pair of shoes, they each chose a pair and then made their way back to the castle. Natalia felt a small amount of relief that the dresses had been chosen and that Sasha, as promised, was able to bargain for a good price. However when she heard the booming chimes of the Hogwart's clock strike noon, her stomach flipped as she realized he would meet her at the door of the Slytherin common room in precisely six hours.

"Ugh, lunch. Thank Merlin! I'm famished. Care for a bite?"

Natalia was too nervous to eat but if she went back to her dorm she would make herself sick with worry. "Sure."

They frittered away the afternoon, sneaking munchies out of The Great Hall and heading to the Defense Against the Dark Arts classroom to get ready. Neither of them could be in the other's common room, so this was the only solution. Sasha gathered up an arsenal of make-up, hair accessories and the like from her room and then met Natalia there.

"Don't you want to go back to your own common room to get ready with your housemates?" Natalia asked, hoping the answer would be no as she was enjoying Sasha's company today.

"Ugh, no. I have to share a room with Lily, Mary and Alice. They are so tedious. Mary is completely boy crazy, and Alice is so far up Longbottom's long bottom, she doesn't talk about anything else."

"What about Lily?"

"Lily and I don't get along very well these days." Sasha said flatly.

"It's because of Severus isn't it?"

"Well, get to the point why don't you?" Sasha narrowed her eyes; obviously this was a sore subject.

"It's all right. I won't say anything. He'd be better off with you. Lily doesn't understand him."

"She doesn't." Sasha bit her lip as she held up different nail polish bottles against her skin, then against the dress seeking a match. "She really doesn't." Her lower lip trembled. "What do you think? Prostitute pink or hooker red?" Obviously this attempt at humor was only to cover up some deep sadness and divert the conversation away from such personal matters. Natalia understood completely and respected the boundary.

"Hooker red, definitely."

They chatted and gossiped about safer subjects for the rest of the afternoon until they heard the clock chime five. "Oh gracious! We'd better get going." Sasha began quickly gathering up her things to take them back to the common room. "Now don't forget to be extremely careful when you put your dress on. Under no circumstances is that to go over your head, unzip it and then step into it. I won't be there to re-do your hair and you know none of those Slytherin bitches will help you." She stopped short. "Oh, I'm sorry. That wasn't very nice." Sasha was stammering and unable to recover.

"No." Natalia laughed. "No you're right about them. Listen thanks for your help today. I don't know what I would have done without you."

"My pleasure. Let's make sure we can sit together during dinner all right?"

"Right."

Natalia made her way back to Slytherin and tried to slip unnoticed through the common room. A few of the boys were already dressed and lounging around elegantly in the well-appointed room. They all looked up when they saw her and she heard a few whistles and catcalls before she made it to the stairs to her room.

As dreaded, Anastasia and Paulette were busy getting dolled up for their evening with whomever it was they were going to the ball with. She had been so preoccupied with her own situation, she didn't even know who her housemates were going with.

"Well, well, look at you." Paulette hissed. "Nice doo. That must have taken a powerful spell." Paulette smirked at Anastasia who giggled.

"Oh leave her alone, Paulette. I think you look lovely Natalia."

Natalia didn't respond. She ignored her catty housemates and began to unpack and smooth her dress.

"What's that?" Paulette approached Natalia as she hung her dress on the knob of her chest of drawers. "You're not wearing that are you?"

Natalia ignored her, knowing there was no right answer.

"You can't wear that to the Yule Ball! No one wears a short dress to the Yule Ball."

Natalia knew these girls would love nothing more than to tear the mickey out of her and she was ready. She thought for a moment what Sasha would do in such a situation before responding. "I'm starting a trend. And why do you worry about what I'm wearing? If I were you, I'd be a hell of a lot more worried about that ghastly pimple in the middle of your forehead."

Predictably, Paulette ran away to the mirror and started whining about her complexion while Anastasia tried to comfort her. Natalia snickered to herself, knowing that would keep those two busy for a while. She wasted no time taking her dress and all her other parcels from the day's shopping excursion into the walk in closet. Hopefully they would leave her be and she could get dressed in peace. She put on her dress, stockings and shoes and then eyed herself in the mirror. Even if the dress wasn't ideal, she looked pretty good. Her ebony hair was swept away from her face and Sasha had done an excellent job on her make up. Her eyes were smoky and her lips looked full and pouty. Still she was missing something, jewelry. Her neck, earlobes and wrists were naked. She had only one piece, the necklace that Lucius had given her, so she pulled it out of her jewelry box and tried it on. It didn't look bad, but to her, it just screamed Lucius. She ripped it off and threw it back in the box nearly shuddering at the very thought of him.

She searched through her drawers looking for something else to complete the look but already knowing she had nothing that would do. She came across a small bottle of lavender extract perfume that she had never used. The last time she purchased her favorite scented soap, they were giving away the sample vials. She didn't buy the perfume as she viewed it as an extravagance and hadn't used the sample, thinking she would save it for a special occasion. Knowing there would never be a more special night in her life, she dabbed a tiny bit behind her ears, on her wrists and with a giggle, between her breasts.

She looked at her reflection in the full-length mirror and sighed, this was as good as it was going to get. Would it be good enough? She jumped when the clock chimed six. She hadn't realized the time and jumped. She was late. If he came and she wasn't there, he might leave. She hustled down the stairs to the jam-packed common room. All her housemates were decked out in their finery and meeting up with their dates. She looked around for Severus but didn't see him. Of course he was always punctual and must already be waiting for Sasha outside the Gryffindor common room. She found a corner of the room where she could wait alone. Already she was embarrassed as she felt the boy's eye her up. There was only one person she wanted to look at her tonight and her stomach was in knots as she waited for him.

_AN: Do you hate me for stopping there? HA! It was long enough already. I promise to update soon. Can't have the poor girl hanging around the common room all alone for too long. __I'll have a picture of Nat's dress on my facebook page (link on the profile). It was just a random picture someone drew for my daughter and when I saw it, well I just knew she was the gal for our beloved Igor:) Please be kind and leave your thoughts:) I'll enter you in the contest to win a dream date with Igor...or Lucius.:) _


	25. Chapter 25 These Eyes

CHAPTER TWENTY-FIVE

These Eyes

Mixed emotions plagued Igor as he prepared for the Yule Ball. It was no fun going to a party when you had confidence issues and at the moment, many plagued him. Since his defeat in the tournament, and then the added insult of his lavender girl completely ignoring his invitation, he'd felt like what his mother would call a shrinking violet. Normally he was boisterous, always seeking attention but now he just wanted to blend into the scenery. However, his position would not allow it. If he wasn't the Durmstrang champion, he would have gladly stayed in that night. But he was. So he couldn't. He felt bad for Natalia already, for he would be poor company tonight. It seemed they were always getting off on the wrong foot.

Natalia… Every time he thought of how his date with her was arranged, he cringed. He'd always been mildly captivated by her, even if in recent weeks she did seem to loath him. A kind girl such as she deserved a more enthusiastic date for the ball. Weeks ago he would have been intrigued by the prospect of a date with Natalia. For, despite his repeated attempts to get to know her, she continued to shun him. No doubt she would tire easily of him tonight, and it would be an early evening. Although he hated the thought of disappointing her, that suited him just fine.

He sighed at his own reflection in the mirror, looking at his untamed mop of dark hair. He'd always thought it looked cool on the pitch, flowing behind him, whipping in the wind, but now he was sick of it and considering chopping it all off over break. Tonight, he did not have the energy to attempt it. He picked up a tube of styling gel, squeezed a little more than usual into the palm of his hand, and worked it through his hair enough to keep it off his face for a few hours. He took out a razor and considered shaving off about three days worth of scruff. He was one of those boys who could have five o'clock shadow by lunch. But he did not have the energy. "Fuck it!" He spat when he tossed the razor into the sink. With a large sigh of resignation, he grabbed his blood red cape, arranged it over his shoulder, and headed up to the deck to meet Levin and the others. If there was anything good about the evening, it was wearing the showy, traditional, Durmstrang dress robes. They always made him feel a little smoother, and walk a little taller.

"Finally!" Levin remarked when Igor arrived on deck. "Hustle up. We're going to be late."

Igor made no response, but did as he was asked. He walked up the hill with the other boys listening to their excited banter but not joining in. Instead he lagged behind, observing silently. Levin noticed and hung back to join him.

"What's up your arse?"

"Who, me? Nothing. Just tired." Igor did not tell his best friend about the latest correspondence from his lavender girl. He didn't want to hear the usual bunch of rubbish from him.

"Merlin's Beard you're a moody bastard. I thought you'd be in a better humor tonight. I thought you liked Natalia."

"Meh..." Igor shrugged. Theoretically he should have been in a good mood, but his temper was foul.

Levin rolled his eyes and didn't press Igor anymore. This suited his friend just fine, for Igor was in no mood for pleasantries. To Levin and the others, this was a night full of promise and pretty girls. To Igor, it was simply another obligation, a requirement to be completed. The walk to the Slytherin common room seemed endless particularly because Igor was dragging his feet, but they finally arrived.

Igor took a deep breath, exhaled with a growl, arranged his features into a more pleasing expression, and gracefully entered the lavishly appointed room. Within a few moments there was a low but audible gasp in the room from several Slytherin witches. "Merlin he is handsome," he heard some girls whisper nearby. He smirked, but their attentions did not lighten his mood, for he knew they were merely curious and essentially a gaggle of cockteases. Every female eye followed him about the room. He was tall and his hair was flowing over his collar in lush glossy chunks. The exotic looking crimson cape trimmed in fur was draped dashingly over one shoulder. A few of the Slytherin boys sneered at he and Levin, knowing and thoroughly resenting that they were outclassed.

To anyone present, Igor appeared bored already. His eyes scanned around the room right over Natalia, failing to notice her. Warmth spread to her hands, and she could feel the sweat about to break just under her skin. Already she was regretting her short dress, for her knees would surely start knocking any second. His perceived indifference made her regret getting her hopes up. She glanced at the exit and wondered if it was too late to run. Being a disappointment was far worse than never having an evening with him at all. His cohorts found their dates and he sighed while frowning.

"Where is Natalia?" Igor asked Mulciber half-heartedly, while scanning the room with a vacant expression.

"Right over there." Mulciber pointed in her general direction, and then went back to his date that was dressed in flame red robes that looked like they were painted onto her body. That bloke was obviously going to have an interesting evening.

Igor followed Mulciber's gesture across the room, and noticed a lovely girl in a blue and green short dress with rich dark hair staring nervously at her feet. He'd never seen her before and wondered who was escorting her. Whoever it was, was a lucky bastard. Her long sinewy legs were enough to make Igor forget his own name. He shook his head to snap himself out of his gawking; knowing Natalia would be offended if he were checking out other girls. Although he felt no romantic inclination, he was still somehow drawn to her, and very much wanted to continue their friendship after tonight.

He scanned the room again, still not seeing her. "Mulciber, where is Natalia?"

"Are you mental?" Mulciber snapped, annoyed at the interruption that diverted his attention from his red devil girl. "I just told you, you oaf. Right there."

Igor felt his heart momentarily stop beating when the raven-haired girl he'd admired raised her face, and he realized what he had not before. Natalia Smith was a beautiful girl. They locked eyes, and for several seconds, neither moved. Natalia blinked her eyes and attempted to smile, but she was far too anxious and could only manage a slight curve on the corner of her mouth. She appeared terrified and Igor wanted nothing more in that moment than to be close to her, and put her fears to rest.

Consciously, he smiled broadly while unconsciously his heart took off like a shot. He had to turn and twist his way through the crowd but never moved his eyes from her lovely face.

He was truly seeing her for the first time, and was astonished at how imperceptive he'd been for years. Why had he never noticed how hypnotic her chocolate brown eyes were? They were as dark as his own. The similarity made him feel an instant and surely eternal connection, as if a part of his soul was looking back at him. The delicate curve of her neck and softness of her shoulders were no longer hidden by school robes, nor were her breasts. Merlin, her breasts were perfection, blossoming just slightly above the neckline of her dress, the perfect blend of good taste and sex. Why had he never noticed the tempting swell of her bottom lip? It resembled a deliciously ripe cherry and he mentally vowed to taste it before nights' end.

"Ti krasIvaya." He gasped, and then swallowed in embarrassment not even realizing that he spoke in Russian until she furrowed her brow in confusion.

"Sorry?" She asked cautiously, while seeming to shrink into her own shoulders like a frightened turtle.

"Oh, I mean...You look so beautiful, I didn't recognize you." He blinked his eyes, still gaping at her, and unaware of anything else around him.

She'd been in Slytherin long enough to know that remark wasn't necessarily a compliment. He could be saying that she looked like hell every other day. Her eyes went to the floor. Without needing an explanation, he knew exactly what she was thinking and stammered as he tried to recover.

"I mean…Natalia you just look gorgeous." She raised her eyes to him and gave him a shy smile. He broke in to the broad grin normally reserved for quidditch goals, for a genuine smile from her was a victory. Gallantly, he extended his arm, which she accepted gladly, and they began the walk to the great hall. His arms were hard and muscular under his dress robes. She couldn't help move her fingers back and forth over them as we walked. He noticed and it caused his chest to swell with pride. He craved attention, particularly attention from beautiful women, and even more so after the isolation imposed on him by his Headmaster. They walked for some time in silence, both thrilled and savoring the physical closeness that they shared with she on his arm.

As they approached the Great Hall, his responsibilities for the evening came back to him. "Natalia, we have to dance the opening dance together. I guess I should have said something before now. Do you dance?"

"No," she shrugged. "But I'm game."

Her willingness to go with the moment pleased him, for he'd always seen her as slightly rigid. "Great. How hard is it really? You move your feet, you follow my lead, nothing we can't handle." He trusted their ability to improvise and it put her at ease. She knew everything would be fine if she was in his arms.

A long awkward silence passed between them while they watched the other couples enter the ball. Both were nervous and unsure how to address the other. Igor was always made uncomfortable by silence. He was usually the one running off at the mouth in an effort to fill up any tedious gaps in conversation. But tonight, after being quite swept off his feet by her newly displayed beauty; he was coming up empty handed. The longer the silence went on, the bigger and more insurmountable it seemed to become. If he didn't say something soon, he might be doomed to an evening of silence and she would never want to see him again. He would once again find himself on the defensive and may never have another chance to get close to this girl again. He was damn lucky she agreed to go after his repeated episodes of boorish outbursts. Perhaps that was why she was also quiet. That would be his opening. He must apologize again and make assurances that he would not behave that way tonight. Of course she was probably just waiting for him to blow it. No wonder she was quiet.

"Natalia," He turned purposefully to face her, and took her warm hands in his own that were suddenly ice cold. "I want to apologize for all the times I've offended you."

He was disarmed by her reaction. She smiled dreamily and tension visibly eased from her shoulders. The affect was enchanting; at least it was for him. "You've already apologized Igor."

Why did his name sound so melodious when it crossed her lips? Was it a spell or was it all in his head? Igor did not know, but he pressed forward. "Yes, but I want you to know," he paused and closed his eyes, for a moment unsure how to proceed, "that I mean it. I was not apologizing for propriety's sake. I've always thought you were an intelligent and good-hearted person. I wanted you to have an equally high opinion of me, but every time I've tried to impress you I've done or said something stupid."

She blushed and dropped her eyes to the floor. "You don't have to impress me. I already have a high opinion of you."

His heart seemed to swell in his chest. The feeling was thrilling, and he squeezed her hands tightly. "You're just being polite. I've behaved badly. I'm smart enough to know that."

"Not so bad really." She looked back up at him; with a smile that was becoming more relaxed and natural the longer they were together. "Actually I was angry at the time but once I calmed down it was rather funny."

"Funny?" He raised his eyebrows. So he hadn't made such an abysmal impression after all. She reminded him of his mother who would shame him in public for poor behavior but then giggle about it with his aunties later. He was on safer ground and began to relax. "Just the same, I regret it, and will work very hard to redeem myself. I promise to shower you with presents to make up for it." He was now comfortable enough to begin flirting with her. I was his strong suit, so he might as well utilize it.

That made her laugh just a little. The movement of her breasts while she giggled was not lost on him at all. "No gifts are required. Shower me with kindness and your attentions instead."

When he looked into her eyes, his adolescent mind wandered to showering with her in a more literal sense. This could be a very interesting evening for Igor Karkaroff provided he played his cards properly. The dance and dinner would be predictable, but he wondered about how they might end up spending the end of this evening. That was the most interesting part. Would he be permitted long moments with her in his arms, letting him test the limits of her girlish resolve, or would he be relegated to a proper walk back to her common room and a chaste peck on the cheek. Though he would prefer the former, he would gladly take the later in hopes that it might lead to more on another night. For he had already decided that Natalia Smith was worth the wait.

"May I have the Tri-Wizard Champions and their guests over here please." Igor was jolted back to reality by McGonnagall. Quickly, he grasped Natalia's hand and they walked over to the tall professor who looked ten years older than she probably was. The stern witch began giving instructions on when and how they would enter the Great Hall and what would be expected of them next. Igor however was not listening. He was far to busy drinking in the sight of the lovely girl next to him. Her short hairstyle allowed him to see places on her neck where his lips might find pleasure later. He still held her left hand in his right but couldn't resist the temptation to move closer to her. Gently he transferred her left hand into his own left, then moved closer so he could put his free hand on the small of her back and then slowly snake it around her waist. The pink blush on her cheeks when she looked up charmed him completely. Neither heard a word of the instructions and only snapped to attention when they realized it was time to enter the ball.

He could feel the tension harden her body as they entered the extravagantly decorated hall. Although he was used to this kind of attention, this girl was not. Once again his protective instincts were aroused and he leaned close to offer her words of encouragement. "Don't be nervous Natalia. You're with me. Everything will be fine."

Terror was plain in her wide eyes as she gulped and took a deep but seemingly difficult breath. "They're all staring at us Igor."

He looked quickly around the room to find that she was correct. No one noticed the other two couples, but all were watching he and Natalia with great interest. He knew they were probably all trying to figure out who Natalia was since she looked so different, and then making assessments and assumptions on their relationship. The expressions on some of the faces were quite priceless and he was if anything only emboldened by it. "Of course they're staring." He lifted his chin high and led her gracefully to the dance floor by her fingertips with a haughty expression. She mimicked his look and swept onto the floor, taking care to swish her hips so her skirt flounced just so. When they were poised to dance, he finished his thought. "We're the best looking couple here."

Natalia giggled quietly but didn't have time for a response as the orchestra started and they began to dance. Igor, accustomed to formal occasions knew exactly how to hold her and lead her firmly through the dance. Everyone watching assumed they had been practicing or dancing together for a very long time, so smooth were their movements. She felt like nothing in his arms when he lifted her at particular times in the dance. When he held her high and looked up at her, a beautiful smile rained down on him and he felt the sensation of being freshly baptized. The breeze lifted her skirts slightly at those times and he was jealous of those around him who were getting the best view of her legs when he was not. No matter. He would get to those lovely stems later, or so he hoped.

By the time the traditional opening waltz ended, the floor was crowded with couples. Igor's official duty was now complete and he was delighted to have the rest of the evening to focus on Natalia. Another song began, this one much slower, and the accompanying dancing not so elaborate.

"May I have the honor of another dance?" So loath was he to let go of her even for a moment that he would keep her on that floor all night. It was the only gentlemanly way to get his hands on her.

"I think my dance card is free." She responded coyly.

With a low, rumbling laugh he pulled her closer this time, and they joined the other couples swaying slowly to the music. It was impossible for him to tear his eyes away from her face. He continually stared at her with a goofy grin, and eventually, she began to giggle. "What's wrong?"

Igor smiled softly and spoke from his heart. "Pardon me Natalia. I don't mean to annoy you. I just can't believe I've had this beautiful girl under my nose for so long and been too stupid to notice." He pulled her tightly against his chest and his grip intensified but only slightly. He felt her content sigh as the tension eased out of her body.

As had become his habit anytime he was close to a new girl, he inhaled deeply. The hope for the elusive scent of lavender was always there for a moment, just a moment, before he would realize that this was not the girl, and he would have to continue his search. More and more, he began to think it was a foolish quest and that perhaps he would be better served to enjoy these women for who they are. But still he could not let go of the dream. So once again he performed this ritual, this time on the shy little girl of no background who seemed thrilled yet terrified to be in his arms. Only this time, he was in for a surprise. Lavender filled his nose and pallet and for just a second, he stopped breathing. Abruptly, he pulled away.

His haste startled the girl in his arms. "What's wrong?"

He did not answer but pulled her close again, this time burying his face in the nape of her neck and inhaling greedily as he pulled her gently but firmly against him. The feeling came immediately back to him. When her body pressed against his, it was like a warm current passed through his chest. This was her. This was the one. He pulled back only enough to place his hands on her cheeks and raise her face to meet his dream like gaze.

"It was you, wasn't it?" Words poured excitedly out of him.

"What was me?"

He attempted a confident smirk but was feeling far too off balance to exude confidence. It came out more like a stammer. "Minerva McGonnagal?"

"Oh," She giggled nervously and dropped her eyes, "Yes, sorry, that was me."

"My lavender girl, I thought I'd only dreamed you." His lips pressed gently against her forehead. "Finally."

She closed her eyes in an effort to keep dreaming this dream. "How did you know?"

"Sense memory." He whispered.

"Pardon?"

"You smell like lavender." He leaned over once more and indulged himself in her scent once again.

"Ah, I'm found out." She whispered. "Scented soap, a dead giveaway."

"Don't make fun of me. Your letters. They always seemed to come at the right time and say the right thing."

"Good. I worry about you Igor," she reached up to touch his face. He turned into her palm and kissed it. "You're very hard on yourself."

"Ahh!" He lowered his head and smelled her perfect skin again. "Why have you hidden yourself from me? I've looked for you everywhere."

"I was afraid."

"Of me?" He looked mildly mortified while shaking his head. "Why would you say that?"

"Because you're you. I just...I don't know...I guess, I was afraid you wouldn't like me if you knew who I was."

"I've always liked you. You just didn't believe me."

For a moment, they'd forgotten anyone else was in the room. The booming voice of Dumbledore soon brought them back to reality as he asked everyone to take their seats.

"Oh Igor, I hope you don't mind. I told Sasha we would sit with she and Severus."

"I'm sorry Natalia, but I'm expected to sit with the other champions and the Headmasters."

"Oh, I see." She looked nervously around for Sasha. "Well, I'm sure they will understand."

"I understand if you would rather sit with your friends Natalia. I'm afraid our table will be a bit on the stuffy side. You go sit with Sasha."

"No Igor. I'd rather be with you. Sasha will understand."

"Are you certain?"

"Yes."

"All right then. Come with me." He grabbed her hand tightly and they approached the table.

_AN: Am I bad to stop there? More to come soon, I promise. Now that Iggy found his lavender girl, there will be good times to come…Fluff and smut…what's better than that? Oh and for the Lucius fans, don't worry he'll rear his handsome head sooner or later. _

_Thanks to ShelleySnape, SevSnape4ever, tbird1965, Jamberine, ireyick, and Diana Pearl Gunn for reviewing this last chapter! It means so much to know that you all like the story and keeps me motivated to keep writing! _

_Little shout out for Snape fans…ShelleySnape has a great new story that is SS/OC that you should check out. It's called Dream of Paradise. Check it out and giver her a review. (After you review this chapter of course-haha)_


	26. Chapter 26 Undercover Angel

CHAPTER TWENTY-SIX

UNDERCOVER ANGEL

Igor held tightly onto Natalia's hand as he led her over to the head table where Potter, Lafayette and their dates were already assembled. As they approached the table Natalia noticed Potter glance briefly at her, look away and then snap his head back in a not so subtle double take. Openly, he eyed her up and down, leering and looking slightly drunk. She was unaccustomed to men looking at her in this manner, particularly since she had been drabbing down her appearance after the incident at World Cup. She briefly worried that Igor might think she invited Potter's attentions and become angry with her. Unsure how to react, she looked anxiously up at Igor, who's expression betrayed nothing even though his hand was griping hers more tightly. Her concerns were unfounded.

Igor outwardly ignored Potter's obvious leering, but instead focused his attention on Natalia, raising her fingertips to his lips before leaning over to whisper in her ear. "Have I told you how beautiful you look tonight?" His breath on her ear sent a shiver down her neck that tickled her so, she slowly shrugged one shoulder.

"Actually you have, but feel free to tell me as many times as the spirit moves you."

Once again he kissed her hand then rested his forehead against hers. "You look beautiful Natalia Smith."

His hair shielded their faces from view, giving them an intimate moment to connect. For a moment, they seemed to be the only two people in the world. She wasn't one hundred percent certain that this performance wasn't for Potter, but she was one hundred percent certain that it mattered little to her. They hadn't been here for more than a half hour but already it was the most enchanting evening of her life.

"Natalia?" A familiar voice interrupted their tender moment. Natalia turned to see Mme. Rosmerta, attired in lovely silver robes that accentuated her healthy figure. Her hair was uncharacteristically smooth and swept up into a formal style that accentuated her high cheekbones and heart shaped face. "Good heavens girl! I nearly didn't recognize you!" Rosmerta took Natalia by both hands and held them out to get a good look at her. "What a lovely gown you've chosen. It certainly suits you. And what's this? Mr. Karkaroff, how lovely to see you again. My, my, you must be smooth to get Natalia to agree to come with you tonight. Why after the last time I saw you, I thought you were on the shit list for sure."

Rosmerta chattered away, going on about the decorations and sprinkling profanity in here and there, while the Durmstrang Headmaster, Nikolay Oblonsky stood behind her looking, in Natalia's opinion, quite dashing for an older man. She might have found him handsome if she didn't know what a wanker he really was. He scowled in Igor's direction, obviously with something on his mind. Igor nervously shook his hand and nodded.

"Why don't you introduce me to your guest Mr. Karkaroff." He commanded while looking down his nose at Natalia.

Igor looked nervously from Natalia, back to Oblonsky, and then cleared his throat. "Headmaster Oblonsky please let me present Natalia Smith."

Natalia responded with a graceful slow curtsy and a demure nod of her head, for despite her impoverished background, she was the product of Slytherin culture.

"Hmmm," Oblonsky grumbled. "Well, I must say she's a damn sight better looking than that stringy little dishrag from the pitch."

Igor winced in mortification and looked at Natalia with apologetic eyes. She giggled, and smiled, mouthing, "It's okay." She was used to it by now. Igor tried to stifle a grin and turned back to Oblonsky. "Actually, this is Natalia from the pitch. I owe you a debt of gratitude for selecting such a lovely witch to accompany me tonight. Thank you Headmaster." He turned back to Natalia and winked, which thrilled her to no end.

"Really?" Oblonsky took a step back and eyed her up and down. "Yes, well, I always did have foresight."

"Oblonsky! Isn't this a lovely evening? And I'm so glad you've brought Rosmerta. So good to see you again, my dear." Dumbledore mercifully interrupted them, and pulled Oblonsky into conversation.

Igor rolled his eyes and heaved a sigh of relief, grateful to be momentarily rid of his headmaster. "What can I say? He's a complete tool." He shrugged, not knowing how to make things right with Natalia after that colossal faux pas.

"Don't worry about it Igor. It's fine." She laughed and touched his arm, becoming more comfortable. Actually a few things going wrong here and there made her more relaxed. She'd always seen him as completely in control, even when he was arseing up, so a few little chinks in the armor made him more human in her eyes.

"Thank you for understanding." His smile was wide and genuine. "You realize this is shaping up to be the table from hell."

"Oh, it will be fine Igor."

"You're just being nice. Seriously, the only thing that could make this table more annoying is..." but Igor did not get to finish.

"Bonsoir Monsieur Karkaroff!"

"Fifi Lafayette," Igor greeted his only female opponent. "I was just saying, the only thing that could make this table more enjoyable was you. You must have heard me." Igor turned on his charm and as always, it did not fail. "Enchante." he bowed and kissed her hand, which was the only part of this exchange that Natalia did not find amusing. "And who is this?"

"Oh, this is Amos Diggory." The two handsome young men shook hands. Then Igor introduced the ladies and it was time to take their seats. The table actually turned out not to be so bad after all. For everyone was so involved in speaking with their dates, and Dumbledore with Madame Maxine, that Igor and Natalia finally had a moment to converse.

"I didn't get to compliment you on your dancing." He began ignoring his dinner and turning towards something he found far more delicious.

"Thank you but you were a strong lead, and made it easy for me. Slughorn has had everyone in my house practicing for weeks but most of the boys aren't as good of a lead as you. Most are quite clumsy actually."

"I see. And do you have a favorite partner?"

"Sometimes Regulus. He's the best dancer in Slytherin. Usually Severus, but mainly because Slughorn makes him and no one else wants to dance with him."

From over her shoulder, Natalia heard Potter smirk. She bristled at his arrogance and cursed herself for making even the slightest remark against her friend in the presence of his enemy. She was so focused on Igor, she was forgetting herself and her normally ironclad defenses were crumbling. Charming, as he was, she could not allow herself that luxury. Slowly, she turned to face Potter with a cool stare. "Something amusing to you Potter?" She glanced down with distain at his powder blue ruffled shirt and cheesy darker blue bow tie. "Something other than that shirt perhaps?"

She wasn't sure how he was going to react and wondered if she should not have checked her tongue in front of Igor. It simply wasn't ladylike to start an argument at a formal dinner, and she was once again reminded of her ineptitude on such occasions. Surprisingly however, Potter's face softened a bit and he gave a slight smile.

"No. Not at all." Even more shocking, he then attempted to engage her. "I haven't seen you in The Three Broomsticks lately. Are you still working there?"

"Well, I've been so busy here that I haven't had time. I'm going to work over the holiday though."

"Is it busy over Christmas?"

She hesitated for a moment. This was quite possibly the longest conversation she'd ever had with James Potter. "Not on Christmas day, but then it picks up. New Year's Eve will be crazy though."

"Is it? Maybe I can get Sirius and Remus to come out and we'll all come down."

"Do it. Rosmerta usually has a great band, it's loads of fun." Natalia could have kicked herself for encouraging them to come. She couldn't stand the Marauders, but at the same time, they were very popular and her first instinct was to try to fit in, and appear socially on par with someone like Igor. In his eyes, it might be better to be in with the in crowd rather than an outsider. Still she felt like a bit of a sellout.

She couldn't see behind her but Igor was positively fuming. He had absolutely no use for Potter and here she was flirting away right in front of him no less. She wasn't even noticing him anymore and this offense to his vanity was maddening. He wasn't the only one annoyed however. Lily Evans, seated on the other side of Potter interrupted them with something trivial and recaptured his attention. Natalia turned back to face Igor but was immediately disturbed by the change in his expression. His eyes seemed darker and his jaw was tightly set. It was a little unnerving to see his mood go from light to dark so quickly, particularly since she had not seen this side of him.

"What's wrong?" She gulped while looking up at him with wide eyes. Had she already bungled this evening?

Igor narrowed his eyes, nodding haughtily in Potter's direction. "You like that guy?"

So that was it. He was jealous of James Potter. The very idea was completely absurd. However there was something touching in his actions. He was worried that she might like someone else better. Nothing could be further from the truth however and, never wanting to toy with people, she attempted to put that silly thought out of his handsome head. She leaned closer and whispered. "He's an arse. But he doesn't need to know that I think so."

His expression didn't change. Obviously he was skeptical. "But you think he's handsome?"

"No." She said timidly. Then growing bolder she whispered, "I think you're handsome." She couldn't resist leaning in for a quick peck on his cheek.

He snickered and his eyes were soft once again. "Oh Natalia, you know just how to play me," he cracked with a roll of his eyes and rubbed her bare arm lightly.

"I'm not playing you Igor." She bit her lip and hoped he believed her.

"There you go again."

"I'm not."

"Don't play the player," he teased, touching the tip of her nose with his finger.

She enjoyed the cozy conversation and manner between them. Sasha was right, he did have a knack for putting people at ease. "Oh, so you're the player?" She teased him, thinking he would like that.

"Not really." He was suddenly serious. "Don't believe everything you hear about me."

"Igor."Fifi interrupted them yet again. _Merlin that bitch is annoying!_

Now it was Natalia's turn to fume, as Igor turned to converse with Lafayette who's boobs were spilling out of her dress.

"Who ez dat girl zat your friend Levin ez vith?" Every time the Hogwarts girls heard those French accents, they bristled. The boys however didn't seem to mind one bit.

"Oh, ahhhhh, Greengrass I think?" He turned back to Natalia to bring her into the conversation. "Natalia do you know her name?"

"Yes, Anastasia Greengrass."

"Vat ez she like?" Fifi was now talking around Igor and addressing Natalia directly.

"Unpleasant." Natalia deadpanned.

"Ha!" Igor threw his head back and laughed. "I thought so too, but you know you can't tell Levin anything about women. He thinks he knows."

"But ee likes her?"

"I suppose." Igor shrugged, seemingly bored with the conversation. In Natalia's opinion, it was just getting interesting.

"Ez it serious?"

"I don't know."

"But you're his best friend."

"Yes but Levin hasn't said much about her."

"Ez dat because ee doesn't like er or because ee's just a private person?"

"What the?" Igor sputtered, looking at Lafayette as if she had lost her mind. "How the hell should I know? He's been after her for a while. Doesn't say much. Though. Why do you ask?"

"No reason." Fifi straightened up in her chair a bit to greet Amos who was returning to pull her onto the dance floor. The orchestra had packed up and the pop band was just taking the stage.

"That was interesting." Igor winked at Natalia but then his eye caught something over her shoulder. She turned to see Sirius Black walking up to their table dragging Sasha behind her. He was taking long strides and she was hobbling in too high heels behind him, taking three steps to his one. Her dress was extremely sexy and her hair and makeup never looked lovelier, but her allure was wasted on Sirius, a very distant cousin.

"Prongs! Let's go have a nip of fire whiskey before the band starts. Peter nicked a bottle from the Hogshead last weekend."

"Hi Nat, Igor." Sasha mumbled politely and nodding, but looking forlorn.

Igor smiled and glanced briefly at Sasha's legs, a move that was not lost on Natalia. However she didn't have time to be annoyed as she was dying to find out why Severus was not the one leading her around. She rose and walked around Black, grabbed Sasha's hand and pulled her away from the group to talk.

"Where is Severus? I thought you were coming with him? Did you have an argument?" Natalia whispered when they were just out of earshot.

"He stood me up." She said flatly but her chin was trembling. The normally confident girl so admired and emulated by many of the other students, was reduced to a shrinking mess.

"What?" Natalia was aggravated with her friend. He was so hung up on that pain in the ass Evans that he was blowing the chance of a lifetime. Girls like Sasha didn't normally pay attention to guys like him, but for some reason, Sasha was. "That's ridiculous. I'm going to Slytherin house right now and..."

Sasha cut him off. "He's not there. He left with Regulus."

"Regulus? Where did they go?"

"Don't know. I only know they left.  
>"And he didn't tell you anything? Not even a note?"<p>

Sasha shook her head.

"Why would he do such a thing? I don't understand. Severus always does what he says he's going to do."

"He didn't tonight. I should have known better." Sasha's eyes dropped to the floor as a fat tear escaped from one eye. "Ooooh, damn it!" She rubbed her eye with her palm. "I'm not normally a crier."

"Oh, I'm sorry Sasha. This is so unlike him."

"Actually it's quite like him. He's extremely thoughtless on such matters."

"Yes I suppose." Natalia was angry enough for the both of them. Severus was going to get the back of her hand when she saw him next. How could he be so stupid? But that would have to wait as the best she could do for now was comfort Sasha. "Well you can hang out with Igor and I."

"Oh, I'm fine. Sirius is with me and those two don't mix well. Go enjoy your evening. You look terrific and Igor can't tear his eyes away from you." Sasha turned back to join the Marauders. Sirius had collected several small glasses and was pouring each of his mates and their dates a shot. As he handed a glass to Lily, Natalia noticed something shiny on her hand. Upon closer examination, it was a sizable diamond ring. Lily clinked her glass against Potters but before drinking he bent over and indulged in a long and lingering kiss. Natalia now understood. Severus, though attempting to move on, could not face the crushing reality of Lily's engagement. Natalia now longed to see her friend again, but only to comfort him, and not to chastise.

As the Marauders raised their glasses, toasting their evening, she walked back to Igor.

"What happened to Snape?"

"He stood her up?"

"Phfft! Fucking moron!" He leaned back in his chair and draped one arm lazily over the back of her chair.

"It's complicated."

"Enlighten me."

"I don't want to bore you. Besides, it really doesn't concern us."

"You're right. And I don't want to waste my evening talking about the potential motives behind Snape's social gaffes." Just then the guitar player riffed a shredding chord that reverberated through the call and drew everyone's attention. "Do you like this band?"

"I don't know. I've never heard them." She shrugged. "Pretty loud."

Igor knew an opening when he saw one. "Oh yes," he began in mock seriousness. "Far too loud. Would you like to go someplace more quiet?"

A sly smile curled across her lips. "Such as?"

"Oh, I don't know." He recalled the night of the bonfire years ago when he'd walked up on she and Lucius in the corridor. What he wouldn't give for that kind of action from this stunning woman in front of him. His cock twitched at the very thought. Somehow she didn't seem like that type, and he didn't want to press his luck and risk her wrath. He'd been on the receiving end of that enough and after he'd looked for her for so long. "Why don't we just take a walk? You can give me the insider's tour of Hogwarts."

She smiled at him. "All right then."

He stood and offered his arm, which she accepted and they sauntered through the crowd toward the exit. Before they could slip out unnoticed, Levin came staggering up. "Iggy! Where do you think you're going? Come have a shot of cognac with us? Sorry sweetheart, you can't have him all to yourself yet."

Levin dragged his friend away so hard Igor stumbled. He did manage to haul Natalia along with him, and pretty soon they were standing among a bunch of red robed Durmstrang boys indiscreetly raising shot glasses and toasting to Igor, Durmstrang, Hogwarts girls, and any other excuse they could come up with. Natalia humored Levin with two shots but passed on the third, putting her hand up and shaking her head when Levin tried to hand her another glass.

"Oh come on beautiful," he slurred. "Every time I see you, you are wound so tight. Relax." He smiled and forced the glass into her hand. "It's a beautiful night and my friend can't take his eyes off you. Look!" Levin put an arm around her and turned her around to face Igor, he clinked his glass against hers and knocked back his shot. Natalia met the mocking eyes of Igor and mouthed the word, "Help!" Igor smiled and shrugged, then shook his head, mischievously indicating that for the moment, he was enjoying this, and she was on her own. She tossed the shot over her shoulder and he laughed loudly at the scene.

"Levin, turn me loose or Anastasia will get mad at me." She wriggled free.

He spread his arms wide. "Where is she? Do you see her? Nope? No, she ditched me as soon as we got here. Good thing too." He rambled on while pouring her another drink. "You know she's really..." He winced searching for the right word.

"Unpleasant?"

"Yes." He nodded his head drunkenly appreciating that Natalia seemed to understand him. "She really is. You know, I don't think she even likes me. As soon as dinner was over she high tailed it over to her friends and I haven't seen her since."

"You know there's another girl here that I think likes you very much." Natalia leaned closer to fill him in on Lafayette.

"Who?"

"Fifi Lafayette."

Levin's eyes grew wide with excitement. "Lafayette." He was suddenly sober and acutely interested in her every word.

"Yes. She asked about you at dinner and wanted to know all about you and your date, if you liked her, how serious you were. She was pretty nosey."

"Really?"

"Yes. And she waited until her date stepped away too so she didn't want' him to know."

"Really?"

"Really. You should go talk to her." Natalia turned him around to face the dance floor where Fifi was standing alone, abandoned by Diggory.

"I can't." He shook his head.

"Sure you can. You're all dressed up and just drunk enough." She snatched the bottle and the glass out of his hand and gave him a push.

Levin laughed and looked over his shoulder at Natalia. "Are you trying to get rid of me?"

"Yes." She smiled. "Go."

Levin squared his shoulders and straightened his hair and robes before walking towards the young lady in question. Natalia set the bottle down on the nearest table and turned to face Igor who was leaning against the exit with his arms crossed and snickering. As she approached him, he clapped his hands. "Well done, my lovely. Rid of Levin and matchmaking to boot, impressive."

"Slytherin." She winked at him. "So are you still up for a walk?"

"I thought you'd never ask." Igor took her arm again and this time they were able to make their exit.

They walked outside to get to the other side of the castle and get some fresh air after. The moment they stepped into the crisp night air, Igor whipped off his cape and wrapped it around her bare shoulders. He didn't ask if she was cold, he just anticipated her need and addressed it. In the courtyard there were carriages lined up. Amusingly enough, many of them were rocking, some slowly, some violently. Natalia looked down, a little embarrassed.

Igor tried to make light. "If the carriage is rocking, don't come knocking." He failed.

Natalia tensed a bit, wondering what he was expecting out of this evening. After all she'd gone through with Lucius, she wasn't sure what she was up for, though she did like Igor so much. All evening, he'd been so concerned with her. He kept asking if she was having a good time. She thought he was so attentive because he genuinely cared about her, but now she began to worry that he was buttering her up for something. She was conflicted in her emotions about the latter. Igor was terribly handsome and kind, but after the trauma with Lucius, she was terrified of sex. But Igor, was, well Igor. He was used to women, beautiful women falling at his feel and probably more than willing to please him in any capacity he so desired. If she wanted to keep him interested, she would have to bend to his will. Would he be twisted and demanding like Lucius? Would he want hand jobs in semi-public places? Or would he force himself on her? No, she couldn't go through that again.

"Igor, I really should get back." She stopped walking. The look on his face when he turned to face her could only be described as devastated.

"It's early." He took out his pocket watch and looked at it, then snapped it shut again and shoved it in his pocked. "Only ten. If you think it's improper to be alone with me we can go back to the dance."

"Uhm, no that's not it." She lied.

"Then let's walk. Or are you tired of my company? That's it isn't it? I'm sorry; it was my comment about the carriages want it? Oh, I'm such a clod. Please don't be angry with me. When I get nervous I tend to say things that are inappropriate." He held her hand in his and caressed it with the other. "You make me nervous Natalia," he gulped.

A jolt of anxiety left her through breath. "I make YOU nervous?"

"Is that actually news to you? No, you're surely toying with me. Please give me another chance." He stood before her with a pleading expression on his face. "Please, I've waited so long for you."

She looked into those big brown eyes staring at her with such great need and longing, and knew she would never be able to refuse him anything. This boisterous, wild young man from a land so far away, was so sweet and humble here before her. How could she resist him? She could never even resist Lucius. The pull that Igor had on her heart would be impossible to resist.

"Would you like to see the conservatory?

His eyes grew wide and he smiled meekly. "The conservatory? Yes. I would love to."

She encircled her arm around his and led him in the direction of the greenhouse. They actually called it a greenhouse but "conservatory" sounded so much better. They arrived and were greeted with an unlocked door. Igor chivalrously opened the door for her and let her pass. The light from the moon and stars and the reflection of the snow all over the grounds gave a warm enchanting light to the room. Greenery clippings were everywhere, the leavings of an afternoon spent assembling decorations for the Great Hall. The room smelled of pine and gardenias.

"This is beautiful." Igor looked all about at the plants, and flowers. "It's far more extensive than the one at Durmstrang. You must have every plant imaginable here."

"Yes they import quite a bit." Natalia wiped her palms, damp with perspiration on her skirt. "Come here, let me show you something." She pulled him on into the conservatory toward the back; the last room was, in the daylight, the sunniest and that is where all the finest flowers were kept. It was full of white amaryllis, vines and gardenias, and also offered a stunning view of the Black Lake and the snow covered grounds. "Isn't this lovely?"

"Not as lovely as you." He was suddenly so close to her. He pulled her close with one hand while caressing her cheek with the other. She looked up at him and once again felt powerless to resist him and at the same time was terrified of giving in. "Natalia, I can't believe we're finally alone together, my lavender girl." He nuzzled his cheek against her temple. "So lovely." He inhaled her scent again. "Intoxicating." He took her hand and placed it over his heart. Even through his thick wool robes, she could feel it pounding. "Do you feel that? That's what you do to me. That's what you've done to me all night, and every time I received one of your letters."

"Igor," Natalia started but was unable to complete a sentence. She didn't even know what she wanted to say.

"Shhh," he whispered into her ear and she could feel his warm breath on her neck, warming her very being.

"I want to kiss you Natalia. May I please kiss you?" The idea that he would be so sweet and unassuming as to ask made her heart melt.

"Yes." Her voice was so breathless; she didn't think he could hear her. But his lips brushed against her cheek as he moved slowly to find the lips he'd been longing to taste. He began slowly claiming her lips with his own and she surrendered willingly to him, melting against his body and raising her arms to wrap them around his neck, pulling him closer. He moaned softly and kissed her more urgently, now daring to caress her bare back and shoulders. She let him cross that line as well and then dared herself to run her fingers through his inky mass of wavy locks and thus ensuring his lips remained in their caress of her own. They felt full and delicious on hers, but at the same time strong and in control of their kiss. Abruptly, he pulled away and she lurched forward slightly.

"Come here." He took her hand and pulled her over to a stack of sacks, presumably seeds and fertilizer. With a wave of his wand, they were transfigured into cushions, and they now had a soft spot on which to lay that over looked the scenery. Natalia went rigid with dread and swallowed hard, but sat down on the cushions with him as he wished. "I adore kissing you." The deep timber of his voice sent a shiver down her spine.

His powers of seduction were living up to their reputation and Natalia, despite her reservations found herself kissing him again. Once again she could not resist tangling her fingers in his hair. This time he reacted fiercely, pulling her tightly against him and pressing his lips against her now with greater force. His tongue swept across her lips requesting passage, which she granted. His breath and his tongue in her mouth aroused a want within her that she hadn't felt since the last year with Lucius. Lucius, no, she must not think about him. This was Igor, her knight in white satin, all she'd ever wanted. His hand left her waist and dared to find its way to her breast. His touch was hypnotic and she could feel her nipples harden under his touch as she moaned into his mouth. His caress was thorough and skilled, his thumb going over and over her peak that he could surely feel beneath the thin fabric of her dress.

His lips left hers and found their way down to his neck, setting off pangs of desire in places she was previously unaware of. They did not stop at her neck, not that was merely a route to the ultimate destination. They trailed down to her exposed cleavage and dared to kiss the top of her breasts before running his tongue between them and causing her to gasp.

"Igor." She pulled his head closer and arched her back to be closer to him.

He growled and pushed her gently down on the cushions, which allowed his hand even more freedom to roam her body. He positioned himself on top of her and ran one hand boldly up her leg and under her skirt. Natalia gasped when she realized he was not stopping at her thigh. No he caressed her bum and pulled her closer to him. "Ahh Ig..." but she couldn't finish, so out of her head was she at the moment.

"Sweet girl." He murmured as he moved against her body.

Her blood turned cold at his choice of words. "Sweet girl." That was what Lucius said over and over to her after the rape. "Sweet girl," he called her again and again as he lay on top of her, their flesh sticking together with seaman and sweat. She could hear him saying "sweet girl" as her perineum burned with the pain of his assault and her wrists throbbed from being restrained. The horror came crashing down on her all at once and without warning.

"My sweet girl." Igor whispered again, and she now felt an over whelming need to wretch.

"Igor stop." She pushed him off and remarkable he moved back without a fight.

"What is it?"

She was shaking, unable to answer. How could she tell this perfect man all of the horrific details of her life? What would he think of her? He might blame her. She blamed herself for everything. Strutting around that night of the World Cup, mouthing off to Lucius, wearing provocative clothing, what a fool she'd been. What a fool she was being now.

He stroked her hair and turned her face to examine her expression. She was terrified about what would happen next. Certainly he would want an explanation for such erratic behavior. Certainly he deserved one. But she could not give him the answer he would seek. His expression was arranged in placid lines and the care and concern if his dark, expressive eyes nearly melted her heart when he asked. "What was done to you?"

Her lower lip quivered. She shook her head slowly and shut her eyes, unable to make a sound. If she started to tell him her terrible tale, it would surely flow from her like a dam bursting and would cost her life. She could not even give him a hint.

Igor seemed to understand without being told. "It's all right. Darling you don't have to tell me until you are ready. But know this, I swear never to hurt you. I could never hurt you." He held her hands, not wanting to broach her space and frighten her.

"No, I know you wouldn't. It's just…" She began to sob again. Damnit! Why couldn't she pull herself together? "I'm sorry."

"Don't say you're sorry. You have nothing to be sorry to me for." He pulled a handkerchief out of his breast pocket and dabbed her eyes with it. In all her days, Natalia had never seen such a gallant gesture. He was like a prince in a fairy tale.  
>"I didn't mean to lead you on." She sniffed.<p>

"Lead me on? No, no, no my dear, you haven't led me on. I didn't have expectations before bringing you in here. Don't think you have to…" He paused awkwardly. "I mean I like you no matter what we are doing. We don't have to do anything."

She continued to sob. She wanted to be close to him but she had repressed these feelings and memories for so long, now they were bubbling up at the most inopportune moment. She leaned against his shoulder burying her face in his robes. Slowly, carefully he placed his arms around her.

"Is this okay Natalia?"

"Mmhmm." She was afraid to say much in such an unstable state.

He kissed the top of her head and indulged himself by inhaling the scent of lavender. He knew it would be his only indulgence tonight, but that was fine. This was the best night of his life. "Do you want to tell me what happened."?

"Hmm mm." She shook her head still pressed against his dress robes.

"It's all right." He sighed and kissed her hair again. "You don't have to tell me. Just let me hold you." He held her gently against him stroking her shoulders and she thought his touch felt divine. "I'll hold you till you feel better. I apologize for being so forward. I couldn't help myself."

"Oh, no Igor you're fine. It's not you it's me."

"Oh Merlin, don't say that." His lip curled and his expression was horrified.

"No, that's not what I mean. I...Oh I don't know what I mean. I'm so sorry."

"Merlin, I always muck things up with you. I'm so clumsy. I suppose you want to go now."

"No. Igor, please don't get the wrong idea, but could we stay here just a little while longer? I feel so safe in your arms."

"We can stay as long as you wish my dear." He pulled her closer, cast a warming spell about the room and then wrapped his arms tightly around her. Neither spoke. They lay there watching the snow in silence. Every so often Igor would kiss the top of her head and breath in her scent just one more time to prove it was actually her. Eventually they drifted off into a contented and dreamless sleep.

_AN: Sigh….I'm ready to cuddle up with Iggy, how bout' you? Poor Nat, she really hasn't faced up to all that's happened to her and now it's coming out in the most awkward ways. Thank you so much for the review love this week! I'm so glad you liked the beginning of the Yule Ball and hope you liked this part too._

_Just a little footnote….as my lovely beta pointed out, the Malfoy's and the Black's are only related closely through Lucius' marriage to Narcissa. According to Sirius, all the purebloods are related in one way or another but I realize that calling them cousins, particularly since Lucius isn't married yet, is a bit of a stretch. Sasha was the OC in my last story and that's how I set her up. Hope the diversion from JK's version doesn't bother you too much. It's not going to come up that much really._

_On a side note, and speaking of Sirius…YEAAAAA for Gary Oldman who got an Oscar nomination today. I will be rooting for him. This however does NOT excuse them overlooking our beloved Alan Rickman for Best Supporting Actor. Really? No love? Really? I'm bummed _


	27. Chapter 27 The Morning After

CHAPTER TWENTY-SEVEN

The Morning After

The heady scent of flowers and herbs were the first thing Natalia was aware of as she drifted into consciousness on Christmas morning. It was unusual but pleasant, and she inhaled greedily to experience more of it. She felt warm and safe, safer certainly than she'd felt in years though she, in her sleepy state, she did not recall why. Warm breath whispered across her forehead, followed by a soft kiss and the feel of being pulled tighter against Igor's chest.

"Good Morning," the gentle voice of Igor made her heart flutter, and she opened her eyes to find herself still in the conservatory, wrapped in his adoring embrace. The memory of the night before made her smile, and she snuggled closer to him under his scarlet cape. He pulled the cape up to cover her bare shoulder and the fur tickled her cheek.

"Merry Christmas." She smiled at him while thinking she would never have a Christmas present better than the sight of his big brown eyes looking tenderly back at her.

"Merry Christmas." He kissed her forehead again. "Are you going to be in trouble for staying out all night? If you are, I'll take the blame."

"No. If Slughorn noticed, which I doubt he did, I'll say I was in the infirmary helping Poppy. Everyone leaves for break this morning. He'll be too out of sorts to check out my alibi. How about you? Will you catch any heat from Oblonsky?"

"I doubt it. He seemed quite taken with Mme. Rosmerta last night. I wouldn't be shocked if he didn't even make it back to the ship."

Natalia giggled at the very thought. "That's pretty irresponsible for a Headmaster."

"You have no idea." Igor rolled his eyes. "He's clueless by choice of our escapades, thinks boys will be boys, you know."

"You're a rather randy lot aren't you?" Natalia traced the edge of his collar with her index finger as she mused.

Igor grunted softly and frowned. "We aren't all alike. Don't put me into some kind of stereotype. We aren't some wild hoard from the northern land of ice and snow."

"I didn't mean that Igor." She touched his cheek softly, hoping she hadn't ruined things with her off the cuff remark. He seemed rather sensitive about his background and she cursed herself for not remembering that about him.

"Because if that's what you think of me..."

"It's not." She silenced him with a lingering kiss. He responded, kissing her in earnest for several minutes, before pulling away and looking at her thoughtfully.

"You look like you have something on your mind Igor."

One corner of his mouth turned up. "Maybe I shouldn't do this. Maybe it's too soon. But it's what's in my heart at the moment."

"What's that?"

"I want to give you something for Christmas." He sat up abruptly and began to fiddle with something on the back of his neck.

"Little late to go shopping."

"No need to shop, I've got it right here." He seemed to concentrate on something before smiling and removing a necklace from his neck. It was darker than silver, appearing to be made of pewter or some other dark metal. On the chain was a small medal that he placed in one palm for her to look at. She'd seen the crest on the front before. It was the rather gothic looking Durmstrang crest with the wolf, the moose and the eagle. "It's our school crest. May I put it on you?" He gulped, suddenly seeming anxious.

"Yes." She turned slightly so he could place it around her neck.

"I know this isn't formal jewelry like most girls want, but it's one of our traditions. Only the girl you care for the most may wear it." He fastened the clasp and kissed the back of her neck, causing gooseflesh to ripple down her arm.

"Ah, and how many girls have worn this particular crest?" She toyed with the medal, running her fingers across it.

"Just you." He turned her gently around to face him.

She responded only by raising her eyebrows and grinning slightly.

"Well, I let my mother wear it once." He laughed nervously.

She thought for a few moments before daring to ask, "Sasha's never worn it?"

"No." His answer as accompanied by his serious expression. "You can ask her if you don't believe me."

She thought about what he said. If she asked, she was quite confident Sasha would tell her the truth, but she didn't want Igor to think she didn't believe him. "I trust you."

He smiled and took her hands in his. "It's so important that you trust me. And I want to know that I can always trust you too."

"You can." She meant it with all her heart but in that moment had no idea what it would eventually mean for both of them.

"I knew I could. You're so honest and forthright. That's one thing I love about you." He leaned forward and kissed her deeply again while remaining careful not to cross the boundaries he remembered from the night before.

They were jolted out of their tender kiss by the loud boom of a horn coming from the direction of the lake.

"Oh no, I've got to go." He jumped up and began frantically looking for his boots. He located one at the foot of the cushion and sat down to put it on. Natalia looked around, found the other across the room and handed it to him, then began to ready his cape for him.

"Are you staying at The Three Broomsticks for the holiday?" He asked quickly while still pulling himself together.

"Yes. I'll grab breakfast in the Great Hall and then head over this afternoon."

"Okay." He stood to put on his cape. "I'll contact you there. I'll write, maybe later tonight, we can meet for a fire chat."

"Sure. That sounds wonderful." She smiled dreamily up at him.

He quickly fastened his cape under his neck and then grabbed her for one last embrace. "I'm so glad I found you." He murmured between kisses. "You have no idea."

The horn blew again and she pushed him away. "Go! Before you get in trouble."

"Okay," he said through his thousand-watt smile as he took two steps towards the back door. "I'll contact you."

"Okay go."

He didn't make it to the door however and came back for one last kiss. "Don't take my necklace off."

"I won't. Go!" She laughed and pushed him again.

This time he left. She walked over to the window to watch him go. He was scrambling down the hill towards the boat, gravity pushing him harder than he could push himself. She couldn't help laughing, when she noticed at least fifteen other boys in telltale red capes scrambling towards the boat from various locations across the grounds. Some were coming from various doors of the castle, one from the boathouse, a bunch were running up the road from Hogsmeade, and another impressively enough, shooting out of the Gryffindor tower on a broomstick. She giggled to herself and couldn't wait to ask Sasha about that one, as there was sure to be a juicy story.

She transfigured a cleaning rag into what would, from a distance, pass for a black school robe, and threw it over her shoulders before beginning her own walk of shame back to Slytherin House. She left out the same back door Igor used, needing some fresh air and enjoying the crispness of the morning. Snow was still on the ground and so she regrettably transfigured her dress shoes into makeshift boots before trudging through the snow. She watched Igor being greeted by another boy in red robes who had just run out of one of the Beauxbattons carriages. She wondered if it was Levin, but only for a moment before the boy tackled Igor and they began laughing and wrestling in the snow. Their closeness made it obviously Levin. The horn blew a third time, and they quickly got up and ran to the ship.

She was at the door of the castle nearest Slytherin when he reached the boat. He climbed safely aboard, joining the other boys who were manually readying the deck. He waved his arms wildly to get her attention, and she waved back.

"I love you Natalia Smith!" He yelled loudly, his voice echoing all across the grounds.

Her face turned scarlet but at the same time she was thrilled. She waved again and responded softly. "I love you too Igor Karkaroff." Surely she was dreaming, and if she was, she hoped she never woke up.

Oblonsky shoving Igor's shoulder from behind, knocking him forward interrupted their impetuous exchange. Natalia could see Oblonsky pointing to something, and Igor immediately busied himself about whatever task he was being directed to. Natalia giggled then entered the castle, not wanting to be the distraction that got him into more trouble.

Levin worked alongside Igor, laughing to himself while raising the jib. "Look at you! Foolishly besotted."

"I don't feel foolish." Igor proclaimed with gusto, sounding more like himself than he had in months. "I feel fantastic!" He breathed in deeply and exhaled with a growl.

"I see." Levin smirked knowingly. "Did you get lucky?"

"Depends on your definition of lucky." Igor frowned and went to help raise the mainsail.

"Well that answers my question." Levin scurried after him.

"I met the girl of my dreams. I've never been so lucky in my cursed life."

"You're kidding right?"

"Not at all."

"Natalia Smith is the girl of your dreams? I mean don't get me wrong she looked fine last night but, the girl of your dreams?"

Igor stood up and looked at his clueless best mate. "She's my Lavender girl."

Levin's eyes grew wide. "Nooooo..." he responded in astonishment.

"Yes! My search is over. She is mine. I am hers. And when I get back to this place I am going to sweep her off her feet. She won't know what hit her and she will be mine forever."

"Well, sounds like you have it all figured out. But you know matters of the heart are rarely that simple."

"Oh look at you." Igor snarled. "Since when did you become such an expert? And what happened to you last night anyway?"

"I was with Fiona."

"Who's Fiona?"

"Lafayette. Fifi. She actually prefers Fiona." Levin looked at his feet and then defiantly up at his friend, seeming to dare him to argue.

But Igor understood his friend's heart all too well. "Fiona." He mused, nodding his head. "That's lovely. Good for you Levin." He punched him in the arm.

"Owe!" Levin rubbed his arm before punching his friend back. Both were glad to have someone to share just the minimal details with and be understood.

_AN: Sorry for such a short chapter after such a long time, but this just seemed like the right place to stop. Some of you are asking about Lucius, so in the next chapter, we'll see how he's spending his Christmas. _

_Special hugs this week to ShelleySnape, Jamberine and Wombat88 who are not only faithful reviewers but also wonderful authors that I love to read! A special shot of Levin's house liquor to each of you! Cheers!_


	28. Chapter 28 Christmas At Malfoy Manor

CHAPTER TWENTY-EIGHT

Christmas at Malfoy Manor

Sasha sat next to Lucius during the elaborate family Christmas dinner. Although she had received the latest model Firebolt broom, expensive diamond earrings, and enough designer clothing to attire every girl in Slytherin, she was having a miserable Christmas. After being stood up by Severus the night before, she felt foolish and unlovable, despite being surrounded by her family. She merely endured dinner, pushing her food around on her plate and contributing nothing to the dinner conversation. The long table in the Malfoy dining room was filled with relatives from both sides of the family as well as Narcissa, her parents, her detestable sister Bella, and Bella's fiancé Rudolpus Lestrange. Rudolpus was stunningly handsome, but there was an unsavory air about him. He was constantly leering at Sasha despite Bella's presence, and it gave Sasha the creeps.

Lucius was also quiet, but Sasha knew that it was merely because Narcissa was on his other side. He was always on his best behavior around his aloof fiancé, but Sasha thought it was more to appease their father than to stay in Narcissa's good graces. Dinner seemed to drag on endlessly, but finally around ten o'clock, the guests began to say their goodbyes. Sasha dutifully assisted her parents in seeing their guests off. By the time the door closed behind Narcissa and her family, Sasha was craving a drink badly.

"You look tired, darling." Her mother Helena said placing a loving hand under her chin. "Time for bed?"

"I'm fine, mother," Sasha moved away from her mother's touch, not wanting to be babied, nor pressed for details. "I was hoping Lucius might join me in a game of billiards. I've missed him so much since he's been away at University."

"Oh, how lovely." Her mother beamed at her children, enjoying their closeness.

"Are you game, Lucius?" Sasha asked with the first glint in her eye of the day.

"Certainly, my dear. I must warn you though. I've been home for a week and practicing." Lucius draped his arm affectionately over Sasha's shoulder and they both relaxed for the first time of the night.

"Well, I'm going to bed. I've had enough for one day." Abraxas grumbled and began marching up the stairs.

Helena looked after her husband, then back at her children. "Well, don't stay up too late." She gave each one of them a hug and kiss before scurrying up the stars after her husband.

"Good night mother." Sasha and Lucius recited in unison.

"Come on." Lucius, still with his arm around her ushered her into the billiard room. The room was large with a rustic stone fireplace, dark masculine furniture, and cherry wood walls. On either side of the fireplace were huge floor to ceiling glass doors that opened to the veranda and afforded a view the gardens, although at this hour they were not visible. Most importantly, there was a large and extensively stocked bar and cigar humidor. "You don't really want to play billiards do you?" Lucius asked with a chuckle.

"Hell no." Sasha growled. "Be a good brother and fix me a stout drink."

Lucius laughed loudly for the first time all day. "Well we may not always see eye to eye but at least we have some things in common. That wine at dinner was horrendous and father won't let me have so much as a brandy in front of Narcissa." He sneaked behind the bar as she walked onward into the room. Before pouring drinks, he helped himself to one of his father's Cuban cigars out of the humidor. It took a few puffs to get it going but when the calming effect of the tobacco relaxed his body, he was ready to be a better host. "What would you like?"

"Firewhiseky, on the rocks." Sasha snapped.

Lucius furrowed his brow. "Not very ladylike."

"Who's going to care?" She snapped again.

He made no further argument, but poured the drink, walked around the bar, and handed it to her. "What's wrong with you today? With all the loot you collected I'd think you'd be in a better mood. You've been whining for a new broom for months."

Sasha shrugged and took a long drink, then winced when the liquor burned through her chest.

"How was the Yule Ball? Mother tells me you attended with Sirius Black. Has he reformed at all this year?"

"No, and I hope he never does." She replied flatly.

Lucius rolled his eyes, forever appalled at his sister's choice of companions. "Are you seeing him?"

"Ewe no!" She nearly choked on her second sip. "I'm not as fond of inbreeding as you. It was just a date of convenience, nothing more."

"I'm surprised you didn't go with Igor Karkaroff. Has that little romance cooled off?"

"We were never really serious. Our mothers were, but we weren't. Actually he went with Natalia and the two of them looked pretty cozy."

Lucius felt his blood cool as her words sank in. "Natalia?"

"Yes, Natalia Smith. You remember her. She was in your house."

"I remember Natalia." He desperately hoped Sasha didn't hear his voice waiver, for she knew nothing of his escapade with Natalia, and he wanted to keep it that way. "How long has she been with him?"

"It was their first date. But judging from the way they were looking at each other, it won't be their last."

Lucius took a long sip of his drink and walked over to the fireplace. "Incindio." He conjured a warm fire and stared hard into the flames, a reflection of his emotions in that moment. So Natalia now had a boyfriend, and it wasn't some indigent loser like Severus Snape. Karkaroff was an international quidditch star, Tri-Wizard champion and from a well-respected, if foreign pureblood family. Why even Lucius' own mother found Karkaroff worthy enough to push a match with Sasha. Had she forgotten him? Did she ever think about him? No, of course after all that happened, after all that he'd put her through, of course not. If she did, her thoughts must certainly be unfavorable. And what about the baby? Did Karkaroff know of the child? Was he going to accept responsibility for it? Or was she with him in an effort to trap him so she would have a father for the child? If the child came out with Malfoy features or hair color, it would be difficult to explain. Although Lucius could not acknowledge the child, the idea of another man raising his child as their own was wrenching. Lucius took another long drink, draining his glass. Always, his hope had been to one-day mend things with her. Perhaps in time she would understand him and see things differently, but with Karkaroff now in the mix, that might not happen. Karkaroff and Natalia always liked each other, though Lucius didn't understand the attraction.

Sasha studied him from the couch. "Hey, now you're the one being quiet."

"Oh," Lucius rearranged his features into more placid lines before turning to her. "Just recalling the Yule Ball that I attended with Narcissa." It was half true. He was remembering the time Natalia pleasured him after the Yule Ball in the middle of the Slytherin common room. Merlin that was sexy. He would give anything to relive that night. The feel of her hand stroking his cock was epic. Narcissa was so cold to him, and the university was so small and gossipy that he hadn't been able to risk cheating on her. He wondered if Natalia had given Karkaroff the same pleasure, or had she gone even further. The very idea was damned near unbearable. "Would you like another drink?" He asked his sister, though either way he was getting himself one.

She handed him her empty glass and he was surprised to see her as badly in need of a drink as he. "And keep them coming." She quipped before stretching out on the couch and carelessly kicking her pumps off.

Lucius went to the bar to make the drink but watched her sprawl and stretch out on the couch. She'd grown into a lovely woman. Her body was curvy but athletic from so much time on the quidditch pitch. At times she seemed quite cognoscente of it and used it to her advantage, but at the moment she looked like the same little sister he'd always known.

He walked over to the couch and playfully shoved her feet off of it so he could sit down. She kicked him jokingly and took another long drink.

"So Sasha what's got your wand in a knot? You usually love Christmas."

"Nothing I wish to discuss."

"If I didn't know any better, I'd say you were more hung up on Karkaroff than your telling me."

"For the last time no. I'm not interested in him."

"How was it that you came to go the ball with Sirius?"

"I told you I don't want to talk about the ball. It was just a stupid ball, I've been to a million of them, so have you, and they're all tedious as hell."

Lucius ignored her rant and continued to press. "I'll find out. I'll ask Regulus and he'll tell me everything just to spite you."

"Regulus wasn't even there."

"Wasn't there? Where was he?"

"No idea. He and Severus apparently took off to go do something. It was rather sudden."

Lucius hung his head. So it was done. He'd heard inklings in the last few weeks that Regulus was prepared to swear allegiance to the Dark Lord along with another young disciple from Hogwarts. He'd suspected Snape with his dark inclinations would be the other disciple, and it appeared he was correct. He doubted either of them realized what they were in for, but it was too late now. The deed was apparently done, and there would be no turning back for either of them. It would never do for Sasha to know or even suspect any of this, so he tried to change the subject.

"I'm surprised that Regulus didn't ask you to the ball. You've always been closer to him than Sirius even if you are in Gryffindor. Is that what's got you all bunched up?"

"Merlin's nightgown! Will you just let it go?" She jumped up from the couch and went to warm herself by the fire.

"I don't see why you're being evasive. You and I have always been able to speak the truth to each other." It was wrong to needle her in such a manner, but at the moment it was an occupation that diverted his thoughts from Natalia and that mutt Karkaroff.

"Damnit!" She whirled around on him, and he could see for the first time, her face contorted with some unknown pain. "I got stood up Lucius. I was supposed to go with Severus. I asked him weeks ago and." Her voice began to quiver and she stopped before she broke.

"YOU asked HIM?" Lucius was mildly disgusted that she would lower herself to such a nobody in that manner.

"Yes Lucius," she began with a roll of her eyes, attempting to put on a tough front. "I asked him. He said yes. I got a new dress and all dolled up and then he stood me up. Just left me waiting in the common room like an fool. Are you happy now?"

Lucius would normally have been quite angry at any slight toward his sister, mainly because he considered her an extension of himself. However, he understood the situation fully and knew there was no tactful way for Severus to extract himself from a social commitment when the Dark Lord called. However, to attempt to explain it to Sasha would be folly. Severus did the right thing, but publicly Lucius would have to behave as if she was wronged. "Well don't you worry. I'll see to him. Why he has no idea how lucky he is to be graced by your attentions. He must have a highly inflated opinion of himself."

"Lucius please don't interfere. I just want to forget the whole thing." She swirled her drink around and listened to the ice clink against the glass before she took another drink. She'd barely swallowed when her lip began to tremble and tears began to burn.

"What's this? Sasha." He hated to see women cry. It made him feel helpless. He crossed the room and put his arms around her. "Forget him Sasha, he's nobody. You can do better."

"Oh Lucius, I just adore him and he wants nothing to do with me." Tears then began to quietly roll down her cheek and she sniffed and wiped snot on his lapel.

"Quite all right darling, this jacket is last season anyway."

She laughed a little through tears. "You know I get asked out all the time but I know it's because they just want my money, or they think I'll sleep with them. I don't know where the latter reputation comes from. Severus is one of the few blokes I know that doesn't think like that. He likes very few people, but the ones he does, he likes because they have positive qualities that he finds admirable. He sees none of that in me. Sometimes I feel like if I didn't have all this stupid money, I wouldn't have any friends. Do you ever feel that way? Oh what am I saying? You're the infamous Lucius Malfoy. You've no reason to give a damn what they think. I wish I was more like you."

He sighed and hoped she never became like him. She was a far better person and he wished to keep it that way. "You're too hard on yourself. Let your big brother have a talk with Severus. I'll straighten him out."

"No. Don't you dare. I don't want him bullied into being nice to me. If he can't be nice because he wants to be, then it's truly hopeless. I'll get over it. Eventually."

"What's your interest in him anyway?" He was dying to know the answer to that question. "Greasy bastard with anti-social tendencies in my opinion."

"I just know, that if someone like Severus loved me, it would be because I was worthy of love. He's selective, unimpressed by name or numeral. If he loved me, it would be eternal." She sniffed and tried to lighten the mood. "Plus if I could wake up every morning to that sexy voice, 'Good morning darling, would you like breakfast in bed or a mind blowing shag?' My life would be perfect."

Lucius wrinkled his nose and chuckled. "Well, that was thoroughly vulgar."

"Oh shut it." She smacked his chest, causing him to laugh harder. "Do you at least understand why I care for someone like that? Just tell me that you understand."

Lucius nodded. He understood more than she would ever know. Igor Karkaroff was a lucky man.

Natalia waited patiently by the fire in the empty dining room of The Three Broomsticks. Her head had been in the clouds all day, unable to consider anything but her Russian Prince Charming and their incredible evening together. At eight o'clock, she began to worry that he had forgotten his promise for a fire chat that night, so she busied herself reading a book she found on Rosmerta's shelf, "Durmstrang, History of our Fathers."

At eight-fifteen, Igor's face appeared in the coals, but she was engrossed in her book and unaware that he was studying her as she read. "Hallo beautiful."

"Oh!" Natalia jumped. "You scared the magic out of me Igor."

"Sorry. What are you reading?"

"Oh, ah, "Durmstrang, History of our Fathers."

"Dear Merlin, you must be hard up for something to read."

"I think it's quite interesting, actually."

"Well, it's filled with half-truths and boldface lies. Stick with me and I'll tell you the real history." The coals rustled as he seemed to press his face forward and it became easier to make out his features.

"Such as?"

"Nothing important. I don't want to talk about Durmstrang. What did you do all day?"

"Nothing much," she sighed. "Mme Rosmerta and I had a late breakfast and exchanged presents, that's it. I read the rest of the day. It was quite nice to have a day with nothing to do."

"I hear Rosmerta and my Headmaster were out quite late." His tone was gleeful and betrayed his love of gossip. "Everyone on the ship was talking about it on the way home. They were calling him Headmaster Hookup."

Natalia commented with mock seriousness as if they were discussing something important. "I can report that she received a very expensive looking bracelet from an unnamed source."

"Oh indeed?" His voice lilted as he played along.

"Mmmhmmm. The label on the box was in French".

"How very interesting," he drawled.

"I asked her about him. She said they are old friends."

"Or perhaps more than friends. But I only have a few minutes before dinner. Let's talk about them another time. I've something I want to ask you."

"What's that?"

"Well, when I arrived home today, there was an invitation to a New Year's Eve Ball at Malfoy Manor addressed to me."

Natalia was glad he was not in the room with her in the moment. For through a fire chat, he probably could not discern the change in her posture, or the tightness that immediately seized her chest.

"I had such a wonderful time with you last night. Would you do me the honor of attending as my guest?"

"Oh, uhm, I don't think so Igor." She was fumbling for an excuse and being evasive to buy some time.

"Why not? I thought we got on well."

"We did, but it's just that I have to work." It was a plausible lie.

"Work? It's New Year's Eve?" His tone betrayed his annoyance. "Can't you get out of it?"

It irritated her that he would think that working was optional, particularly on a holiday in the pub business. "No. It's one of the busiest nights of the year. I can't just leave Rosmerta after I've committed. It would be irresponsible."

"Fine. Then I'll come to see you."

"No. You should go to Malfoy Manor Igor. There will be very powerful wizards there and you should use the opportunity to make contacts and be impressive."

"I could be more impressive with a beautiful girl such as you on my arm."

"With my zero social status? Dream on. Besides, I'll be too busy here. Rosmerta needs me. I'll see you when we get back."

"That's not soon enough for me," he growled.

"Igor," a voice called him in the background and uttered something in Russian.

"Who was that?" She'd almost forgotten he was in a loving home full of family. The very concept was foreign to her but she was glad he was well tended.

"My sister, Myra." She could see his eyes roll in the coals.

"What does she want?"

"It's time for dinner. Merlin, she's bossy."

"That's not a very nice thing to say about your sister." Natalia laughed at the very thought of him being pushed around by his sister.

"It's the truth. Not a bad girl but she thinks she's my mother, always clucking about. It's a big sister thing I suppose."

"I wouldn't know."

"Lucky you. Listen I have to go. It's crazy around here, way too many relatives. Can we talk tomorrow night? Same time?"

"I'm afraid the restaurant is open and I'll be working."

"Then I'll write you. Will you write back?" Igor's hopeful boyish exuberance was visible even through the coals and it was terribly charming.

"Of course," she smiled.

"Alright. Are you still wearing my necklace?"

"Yes." She proudly held it out for him to see.

"Hmmm, I love the way that looks on you. Good night Natalia."

"Good night Igor."

Natalia enjoyed the most blissful sleep that night. Igor made her feel loved and special. It was never that way with Lucius, for even in the best of times, he always possessed the power in the relationship and would remind her of that when it suited him. This budding romance with Igor was pure, the way young love was meant to be.

The next morning she awoke early without the need of an alarm to rouse her. She felt energized and ready for the world. She hurried downstairs ready for a busy day. Hogsmeade was full of people shopping and lunching. The Three Broomsticks was flooded with family and friends reuniting after the holidays. Despite the crowds, Natalia breezed through the brunch and lunch rushes, humming merrily to herself as she went and not even tired despite the need for her to work a double shift.

Around three o'clock, she walked out to the back alley to bring in some supply crates that had just been delivered. 'Knights in White Satin' had been stuck in her head all day. By the time she was by herself in the alley she was singing it loudly secure in the knowledge that no one was around to hear. Unfortunately, she was wrong.

"I've always liked that song too."

The voice behind her sent chills down her spine. Her shoulders tensed and her teeth began to chatter in terror. Slowly she turned to face Lucius. He seemed taller than she remembered, and his shoulders were broader, adding to the intimidation factor as he glared down at her with steely eyes.

He looked slightly disheveled and from his expression, she knew immediately that he was in a foul temper. Still scarred from her last several encounters with him and the memory of their first in a similar back alley, she panicked. "Oh," she trembled in fear and turned to run, but he snatched her by the arm. "Oh no Lucius please!" She screamed.

"Muffilato!" He waved his wand and she knew her screams would be futile.

"Please don't. Oh Lucius, please don't." Natalia's hands quaked and she fumbled for her wand in vain. He grabbed her wrists and pinned her against the wall.

Oh Merlin." She shut her eyes tight, bracing for the hell that was coming after her for a second time.

"I'm not going to hurt you Natalia. I just want to talk to you."

She whimpered in his grasp, not believing him for a second.

He moved to within a few inches of her face. "What's going on with you and Karkaroff?"

So he knew. Of course he did. Sasha must have mentioned it. Her mind raced, unsure what the proper answer, the one that could keep her safe would be. "Nothing."

He stuck his wand under her necklace and lifted it under her nose. "Is this nothing? Durmstrang crest? He wouldn't have given you this if he wasn't serious."

"Lucius, please."

"Does he know about the child? Our child?"

Of course, he didn't know. No one but Severus knew. She hadn't contacted him since it happened, partly because she didn't want their communications intercepted, and partly because she wanted him to keep sweating. She had to tell him now though. "I had a miscarriage."

"Wha..." For a moment, he was concerned but then his expression hardened and his eyes became cold. "There was never a child was there?"

"Of course there was. Do you think I'd ever ask anything of you if there wasn't?"

"If you could squeeze a few galleons out of me yes." He raised his chin and looked down his nose at her. "I do."

"I never wanted your money before then."

"Really? You know I kept a record of how much I paid you over the years? Would you like me to give you a statement?"

"Stop it! You manipulated me."

"How much do you think you can squeeze out of the Russian?"

"I don't want anything from him!"

"He won't give a damn about you, you know. He shags every witch that will stand still long enough and half the ones that won't. I'm sure there have been multiple tarts like you that have tried to trap him, but he doesn't give a damn about them. Rakish reputations seem to enhance the fame of quidditch stars."

She had no retort. He was calling out her fears and it terrified her that this monster knew her so well. She searched desperately for a way out of the alley and away from him. Knowing that the only way to appease him was to stroke his ego, she attempted a redirect.

"I know he doesn't really care." She gulped.

"Do you?"

She shook her head but didn't meet his eyes. His grip on her softened and he rubbed her arms lightly.

"Why are you with him?" His voice now showed concern. The change would have been remarkable, to a casual observer, but Natalia knew him well.

"We just had one date."

"And he gave you his crest?"

"Yes. He's rather impulsive, I suppose."

"Probably trying to get you in the sack" Lucius, even in a tender state, couldn't resist a stab at his rival. "Does he know that you were pregnant with my child?"

"No."`

"Good. Can you tell me what happened?"

"I don't know. I passed out while I was working one night. I suppose I'd worked too hard. There was a lot of blood."

"Who saw you? Did you go to the infirmary?"

She had to quell her urge to smirk at him. He was more concerned with who else may know than her health. She knew better than to tell him about Poppy. It could put her in danger of losing her job. Lucius would see to that. "No." She whispered, but then added, "Well, just Severus." She knew he wouldn't believe her story without a witness, and since Severus already knew, he was the logical choice.

"Was it...painful?" He looked queasy, like he was scared to hear the details of such feminine woes.

"No. I passed out. I was pretty weak for a while, but I've been in worse shape."

"I'm sorry I wasn't there with you." He squeezed her hands tightly. "Were you terribly sad?"

She looked at him as if he were crazy.

"Hmmm, no I suppose that's a ridiculous question, after all that I've done."

Natalia made the wise decision not to agree with him out loud.

"I'm so sorry my darling." His head fell forward and his forehead rested on her shoulder. "This isn't how I wanted things to turn out."

Obviously he wanted her to comfort him, but she had nothing left to give this man. He'd taken everything precious away from her. His actions were unforgivable. And yet, when he was like this, concerned and tender, she was inexplicably drawn to him.

"Can you ever forgive me?"

"I want to Lucius. Truly I do. But it seems each time I forgive a small infraction you commit a larger one. If I forgive you again, you'll commit another. I don't know if I can do it again."

"You fear me." He nearly choked on his words.

She was reminded of why she'd gotten tangled up with him in the first place. But she was smart enough to know that he was toxic. He was a cancer on her life from which she must distance herself. "I dread you."

"Dread me? Even worse. You've always thought I have no heart, that I'm insincere, but you're wrong. It kills me to hear of you with him." He slapped his hand against his chest for emphasis. "Do you know how badly I want to rip that crest off your throat?"

The situation was beginning to escalate again. Although Natalia was furious, she made a great effort to keep her tone calm. "And yet I was always expected to understand why Narcissa came first in your life, why she was the witch to whom you were publicly devoted; while I was merely something to be ashamed of, like a social disease."

"That's not how I wanted things to be."

"But it's what you chose. Why can't you just let me go? There is no longer a child and I'll give you all the money back if you want. Please just let me go. Lucius, can you just please let me be happy."

He sighed, and leaned forward to lightly kiss her forehead. "Your happiness is all I've ever wanted."

The irony of that statement made her wince, and she looked down at her feet, lest her expression anger him again. But she needn't have worried, for he made a concession.

"Karkaroff received an invitation to our annual New Year's ball. Did he tell you?"

"Yes, he asked me to accompany him. I refused."

"Because you didn't want to run in to me."

"Lucius, I can't walk into your father's house, particularly on the arm of another after all that's happened."

"No, I suppose not. Have you told him?"

She rolled her eyes. He could be incredibly thick sometimes. "Unbreakable vow? Does that ring a bell? If I'd told anyone, I wouldn't be standing her now would I?"

"Right." He mumbled through tight lips.

"I told him I have to work which isn't a total lie."

"And he believed you."

"Appeared to."

"Natalia! Where are you?" called Rosmerta from the kitchen. Lucius waved his wand grandly to remove the silencing charm so she could answer.

"Be right there!" Natalia yelled back. "I have to go or she'll come out and start asking questions."

"Are you sad? About the miscarriage?"

"No. It was a merciful blessing for both of us."

"Yes. Yes, I suppose you're right." Lucius watched her walk back inside with a heavy heart. He was losing her. Despite his aversion to acknowledging the child, he'd thought it would be a permanent connection between the two of them. Now that connection was gone. She was emotionally distant as well, obviously falling in love with another wizard. Quickly, he apparated himself home. As he walked up the path to his home, his heart felt tight in his chest. He struggled to find the right description of the ache but settled on a yearning sensation. Remembering her comment about him considering her a social disease, he couldn't help but smirk. It was partly true for she was a chronic affliction who appeared at the most inopportune times and interfered with his love life.

AN: OK so my Team Lucius buddies must be happy he's back in the mix:) As rotten as he is, he's still just too tempting to resist. Or maybe I just have bad boy issues:) Hope you liked it. Please drop me a review and let me know. I love to hear from you! Thanks to my faithful reviewers-Tina the extra dose of Lucius was just for you :) Enjoy your Valentine's day!


	29. Chapter 29 Party Out of Bounds

CHAPTER TWENTY-NINE

Party Out of Bounds

Igor entered the lavish ball fashionably fifteen minutes late, unescorted, and feeling lonely despite being at an even with at least three hundred guests.

"Igor Stepan Karkaroff of St. Petersburg, Russia." The shuffling, timid little house elf weakly shouted Igor's introduction, causing heads to turn in his direction. His fame always preceded him, and women in particular regarded him as an attractive curiosity. For tonight he eschewed his traditional scarlet Durmstrang dress robes in favor of something more commonplace that would blend more appropriately with the English guests. Earlier in the day while his elder brother was otherwise engaged, Igor raided his closet and borrowed his best dress robes. Although the jacket was longer, it was cut rather like a muggle tuxedo, and with a crisp white shirt and blood red cravat, he came off quite dashing.

His eldest sister Myra had pestered him relentlessly all week to take her to the ball with him, so desperate was she to meet young men from another land. Igor refused her, knowing the snotty English blokes would not find his plain and spindly sister attractive enough to dance with and that she would tell surely rat him out to his father if he decided to have a nip. More importantly, he also hoped Natalia might change her mind about coming with him and he wanted to be free if she did.

Since their last fire chat, he fretted endlessly about his romantic standing with Natalia. He poured out his heart to her in the letters he wrote to her daily, emotions gushing forth like the damn had burst. In contrast, she'd only written every other day and they were merely tiresome factual accounts of her daily activities. "Today I worked the dinner shift. There was a small fire in the kitchen. It's quite windy today." While he was interested in what she was doing, he was needy and frantic for confirmation from her that she felt similarly inclined. But she withheld the craved reassurances from him, and he began to wonder if he had merely imagined her attraction to him. Adolescent insecurities bombarded him at every turn and he could not escape them.

"Hi Iggy." Sasha greeted him, resplendent in a black shantung silk sleeveless dress with a demure neckline that covered her collarbone. The skirt came to her knees and flayed out gracefully. A thin gold belt circled her waist and cinched in the front. Her hair was down but tousled about looking as she'd just rolled out of bed after a fantastic shag. He wondered if this was a contrived effect or if it were a naturally occurring phenomenon. Well if he couldn't be with Natalia tonight, Sasha was always good company. So he greeted her warmly.

"Sasha," he bowed and kissed her hand "You are enchanting as always."

She snickered and rolled her eyes to the ceiling. "Flattery will get you everywhere," she teased him. "Where's Nat? I thought sure you would bring her. Don't tell me you've mucked that up already."

Just beyond Sasha stood Lucius, who was turning his head slightly, presumably to eavesdrop.

"Sadly, she had a prior engagement." Igor responded brining a smirk from Lucius who then turned his stiff attentions back to Narcissa. Igor's jaw tended and his eyes bored into the back of Lucius' head. He loathed his perceived rival from that point on.

Sasha looked quizzically at Igor, then at her brother. "What's wrong with you?"

"Nothing." He was sulking already and wondering why he was here.

"Hmmm, want to sneak a shot of vodka? Bella conned the bartender to slide us a couple bottles they're all in the gallery. "

Igor shrugged, bored already and nor particularly caring what they did. "All right then." He offered her his arm giving the appearance of propriety despite their covert mission to indulge in ill-gotten inebriants. "How exactly did Bella score this bounty?"

"She let him feel her boobs." Sasha snorted a little too loudly.

"Ha! Nice!" Igor laughed loudly drawing eyeballs again. Arm in arm they strolled casually off to the ostentatious gallery room of Malfoy Manor. Igor was well versed in art history and all the proper humanities both wizard and muggle. He glanced around the room at the expensive collection. Everyone in the room was around the same age and nodding mindlessly in approval of all the expressions on the wall. Sycophants. The works were certainly producing the desired effect that their owners intended, however to Igor they screamed Nuevo Riche'. Though the Malfoy's were regarded as one of the finest families, their money had only been in their possession for two or three generations. Igor's family could be traced back thousands of years and was linked to the most powerful and sometimes most notorious wizards of Eastern Europe. But the rules were different here. It was their game and he had no choice but to play along. It was useless to boast and in his opinion, bad form. So he kept quiet and nodded in agreement with the other disciples.

He was forced to make polite conversation with the Slytherin alumni and current students. He had hoped to see Regulus this evening but was disappointed, as his friend was a no show. So here he was, stuck chatting about quidditch with the barely tolerable Lestrange brothers while Bella Black eyed him hungrily. A few months ago he might have seduced her for a laugh with a, "Hello love, lets you and me find the nearest cupboard for a round of how's your father." Tonight, however, it made him uncomfortable. He had no interest in getting into a row with Lestrange and even less interest in fondling anyone other than Natalia.

The very thought of Natalia sent him into an emotional tailspin. What was she doing tonight? If Potter and his ilk carried out their plans, they would all be at The Three Broomsticks where Natalia was working. Notorious womanizer Sirius Black would no doubt be in attendance and after seeing the way Natalia looked at the Yule Ball Sirius could very likely be falling all over her after a few pints. Perhaps she would fancy him as many women did. After her mundane letters, he couldn't help but be uncharacteristically unsure of himself.

Sasha tossed back at least three shots before dinner and Igor, being a gentleman kept up with her. She was however much smaller than he, and the liquor was taking an immediate toll. She began to become clingy and laughed too loudly at his jokes. She seemed unwilling to let him out of her sight and he was feeling trapped and wishing he'd never come. Dinner was more of an endurance event than a feast as he was seated too near Lucius, Narcissa, and Abraxas Malfoy and was forced to talk tedious matters of family, estate management and more quidditch. Merlin, didn't anyone think he could converse about anything else? Just because he excelled at one thing didn't make him ignorant of all others. Sasha did not eat much but continued to consume wine. Normally Igor didn't meddle but it was beginning to have a rather unattractive effect on her. Her eyes were half closed, her speech was slurring and she was beginning to become rather klutzy. When finally she knocked over a glass of red wine staining the white tablecloth, it became impossible for anyone to ignore.

"Damnit Sasha!" Her father hissed, his face red in anger.

Igor seized the moment as a tool to make his exit from the table. "Sasha my dear you look a bit pale. Perhaps we should take you for some fresh air. This room is rather stuffy, particularly for a delicate flower such as yourself.

"Excellent idea. Get her out of here." Abraxas snapped.

Igor rose and had to help Sasha out of her chair. She couldn't quite steady herself.

"I'm sorry father." She whispered pathetically, but her father ignored her and turned back to Lucius to discuss his university coursework.

Igor had to do a bit of maneuvering to get her out of the dining room unscathed as she was wobbling about on ridiculously high heels. "Shall we go back to the gallery?"

"Mmmphff. Billiard room." Sasha mumbled and leaned in the general direction of their destination causing Igor to shift directions. As soon as they entered the deserted room, Sasha broke free and staggered over to a barstool. "Be a lamb and make me another drink."

"What?" Igor laughed. "Oh no, I don't think you need anything stronger than a pumpkin juice at the moment my dear."

"Piss off." She snarled.

"I love it when you talk like a bloke." He continued snickering at her as he searched behind the bar for something non-alcoholic. "Might not be a bad idea for you to eat a little something. Would you like me to fetch you a nibble? You didn't eat much and you really need to. I'm sure there is plenty more of that duck. It was slightly greasy but the gravy was stellar."

The subject of grease and gravy was too much for Sasha for she went green. Her eyes suddenly grew as big as saucers. She slapped her hand over her mouth and went running straight out through the glass doors onto the veranda. Igor watched her go and then listened to the agonizing retching sound and the accompanying vomit hitting the bushes below. He sighed heavily thinking this miserable affair got worse by the second.

He strolled onto the veranda only to find her bent over the railing with her arse in the air. It was a tempting possibility had the other end of her not been spewing forth bile. She shook and struggled to keep her hair out of her way, frantically pushing it behind her ears only to have it fall forward again. He sauntered over to her and sat down on the rail beside her, then gently swept her hair back and held it out of the way. "You see my love, chivalry is not dead after all."

She responded with another great heave and Igor turned his head while chuckling. "I must say, this is quite possibly the worst New Year's Eve I've had in years."

Sasha spat twice and seemed to look about for something to wipe her mouth on. Igor took a handkerchief out of his breast pocket and handed it to her. She snatched it and wiped her mouth, spitting once again over the railing.

"That's what I like about you Sasha. You've got class."

"Bugger off home."

Igor giggled again at her predicament. She glared at him for several moments before she began to giggle herself.

"I'm so sorry. I've made a fool of myself."

"Don't worry. No one saw you."

"They saw me at dinner."

"Yes, but in another hour everyone will be smashed and it won't matter. It's New Year's Eve."

They were distracted by the sound of voices entering the billiard room.

"Oh no." Sasha tried to stand up straight and gather herself, but she was still in disarray. Mercifully, Igor pulled her around the corner finding a large potted topiary to shield them from view.

"Just until you feel more like yourself." He whispered. They both leaned back against the outside wall, the cold stone serving to wake them both up a bit.

"Come on Cissy, just a quick drink or two, you've be a lump all night. It will help you enjoy the party."

"Nothing could help me enjoy this party." Narcissa sighed

"Take the drink anyway." The sound of glass clinking and a pause followed, presumably, Cissy was taking her sister's advice. "Honestly I don't know what's the matter with you. Lucius may be a big stiff but I bet he's got a big stiff one he's dying to give to you. That would liven up your night quicker than you could say 'Bob's you're uncle."

Igor shook with silent laughter and turned to Sasha who gestured as if she was about to vomit again. He put his finger up to his lips indicating that they should continue to eavesdrop.

"You're disgusting Bell."

"It's not disgusting, it's lovely and you should try it. You should absolutely test drive that bloke before you get married. Probably not a huge risk though, I bet he could shag you rotten. I can't believe you're still a virgin. How can you stand it? I'd be jumping out of my skin."

"I think that should be only for my husband." Narcissa whispered.

Igor looked back at Sasha and they both smiled. Sasha was obviously pleased that her brother was being well thought of, but it didn't last.

"I mean that is what he's paying for isn't it?" She went on about her fiancé ruining the moment. "A pureblood virgin. Can't have him disappointed after all these years can we?"

"Don't you like him at all? I think he's incredibly sexy, like some swaggering albino pirate. Look, if that's all you're worried about, I'd be happy to take a good rodgering just to give you a preview." Igor looked back at Sasha's disgusted expression as his own lip curled up in revulsion. The pause was extensive before Bella spoke again. "Oh come on, I'm only kidding."

Sasha stood on tiptoes and whispered to Igor, "No she's not."

Bella cleared her throat and changed the subject, "Speaking of a good rodgering, I bet that young strap Karkaroff could do right by both of us." Bella cackled in tune with more clinking glasses. Igor strained to hear more titillating details.

"Oh stop he's a foreigner and you're promised to Rudy."

"Yes, but you know a man like Rudolphus could never be expected to have only one woman. Why should he be the only one to have a little fun? Igor thinks he's so worldly and suave but I bet I could scare the magic out of him."

Sasha elbowed Igor, her face joyous for the first time all night. He laughed silently as well. Bella Black sexually scaring the magic out of him, out of anyone, was something for which people might buy a ticket to see. The entire situation was utterly preposterous and he couldn't wait to tell his mates.

"I don't think you stand a chance with Mr. Karkaroff." Cissy said with characteristic calm.

"Oh why? Because of Sasha? She can never hang on to a man very long. Did you see her? She's probably passed out cold someplace by now. If she's lucky, he's giving her the high hard one in her semi-conscious state."

Neither Igor nor Sasha looked at the other, both glad for the cover of darkness over their expressions.

"No. From what I here he attended the Yule Ball with Natalia Smith and appeared quite smitten with her."

"Who?"

"Natalia Smith. You remember her. Homely little stringy girl, kept company with Severus Snape most of the time."

"Oh Merlin. Not her, she's ghastly."

"Well I'm told she's quite attractive now and he thinks she's lovely."

"I'm sure she's good for a shag but probably no more. If he's so smitten, why isn't she here with him tonight?"

"I don't know, perhaps he was ashamed to bring her here. She could never be accepted in such a group, why he's merely tolerated himself. If he weren't such a quidditch standout and one of the few possibilities the family has to marry off Sasha, he wouldn't be here at all. If he shows up with that little urchin he'll be banished for certain."

Igor bristled hearing those witches discuss his lovely Natalia.

"I always thought she was balling Snape. He's not much to look at but an angry young buck like that is bound to have needs. Someone has to be shagging him, might as well be her. You know there were rampant rumors while she was in school…" Bella trailed off causing Igor to wonder what she knew.

"Rumors?"

"Oh just idle chatter that she was screwing someone. Most assumed it was Severus. Really she should hang on to him if it's true. His stock has been rising, as of late, I'm sure you've heard. He'd be her best hope to improve her station. Severus will become someone someday; Karkaroff will never rise above his background. You know if she doesn't stick with him, I might give Snape a go myself. He's not completely unfortunate looking and I could use another ally."

"Oh Bella, stop it."

Bella merely cackled. Come on, let's get back to the party before some scheming witches like ourselves take a liking to Rudolphus and Lucius. I still say you need to give that broom a test drive."

Sasha and Igor continued leaning against the cold stone, staring over the moonlit gardens in silence, both their minds running away on rumors and conjecture. Igor scolded himself for even coming tonight. The very idea of making connections and alliances in this circle seemed foolish. He should be with Natalia this very instant. How could he have left her alone on a holiday? Was she with someone else, Severus, Sirius? His stomach churned a mix of liquor, rich food and shame.

"Oh Igor, I'm sorry. You mustn't listen to them, they're such busybodies."

"Mmmm?" He was barely aware of Sasha still standing next to him. "Oh, no. I mean, I know. Are you all right?"

"Mmmhmm." She mumbled. It was a lie. She was still trashed, now cold and completely depressed at hearing the crassness of her brother's soon to be family, the disparagement of Igor and the suggestion of Severus with either Bella or Natalia. "I'll be fine." She tried to put on a brave face in front of her friend.

"Would you find me terribly rude if I left the party? There's something I must attend to immediately."

"You're going to The Three Broomsticks aren't you?"

"Yes."

"As you should. I'll see you back at school."

Igor nodded mechanically and with singularity of purpose, turned to walk down the steps of the veranda to an apparation point.

"Igor."

"What?" He turned, slightly annoyed at even this momentary detention.

"Thank you for taking care of me tonight. Natalia is a lucky girl."

Igor merely nodded again and then walked quickly towards the point, desperate to be with Natalia again. It suddenly became imperative that she be in his arms when one year passed over into the next. Nothing else mattered to him.

The Three Broomsticks was packed with people that night and Natalia was extremely busy but enjoying herself despite the massive workload. The patrons were drunk but congenial. Potter had in fact shown up with his friends but since she'd stood up to him at the Yule Ball, he was friendlier as were his friends. She knew however not to set too much store by this for if Severus were here, the dynamic would certainly shift. Knowing this, she easily resisted the outlandish lines tossed her way by Sirius as well as the quiet flirtatious sweetness of Remus Lupin. Besides, her heart belonged to another.

It was killing her not to be with him tonight, but no way could she have gone to Malfoy Manor. She wondered if he was dancing with Sasha or some other girl. Sasha seemed to have no interest in him, but after a few drinks, who knew? Igor expressed his feelings with abandon in his letters, however she couldn't help but worry that affections given so quickly and freely, weren't meaningful. Truly she had no confidence when it came to men and was feeling very cautious about Igor. He consumed her thoughts all week and so tonight, with the busy-ness and high decibel level was a welcome change. She could relax.

She glanced over to the bar at Mme Rosmerta. Headmaster Obonsky surprised her by showing up tonight and though Rosmerta made attempts to help her staff, she was utterly besotted and generally useless. They made eyes at each other across the bar and occasionally she would lean over and plant a soft kiss on his nose or his cheek. He looked back at her sheepishly; yes it could only be described as sheepishly. It was quite out of character but still very sweet.

It was only a half hour till midnight and the crowd was rowdy and dancing about wildly. Several times young men attempted to pull her into the circle but she remained firmly planted outside the action and waived them off. Natalia was standing on the outskirts watching the dancing, laughing and keeping time with her feet to the music. Suddenly she was grabbed from behind and whirled around. She was quite taken by surprise and immediately annoyed until she looked up and saw that the man dancing with her was none other than Igor Karkaroff.

She squealed and threw herself against him, never happier to see someone in her entire life. "Igor! What are you doing here?"

"Mmmm," he held her close and inhaled her scent, grateful to be graced with her affections once again. "Do you think I would let midnight come without kissing you?"

She pulled back and beamed at him. "But I thought you were going to Malfoy Manor."

He shrugged. "I was there. Now I'm here…with you."

"But won't they think that's terribly rude?"

"I don't give a hippogriff's ass what they think." He grinned, and twirled her around. "That party was so tedious. I don't know how they stand themselves. This is where I belong." He pulled her close once more for a kiss.

"Karkaroff!" Oblonsky interrupted them as he barked at his young protégé from across the room.

"Oh Merlin are you fucking kidding me?" Igor groaned.

Natalia giggled and touched his cheek softly. "Oh I don't think he'll give us much trouble, he's knee need in the hoopla that is Rosmerta."

"Oh is he now?" Igor snickered. "Well let's go face the music and get it over with." He pulled her along to go greet Oblonsky at the bar. "Good evening Headmaster."

"I thought you were off with the Malfoy's."

"Yes sir I was, but decided to attend this party as well. I am fortunate to have so many invitations."

"Mmmm," Oblonsky grunted. "Does your father know you're here?"

Of course Igor had not told his father, he hadn't even planned on coming until a few minutes before, but it wouldn't do to get in to all that now. "Yes sir."

"Hmmm," Oblsonsky grunted again.

"Oh Nic, leave them alone." Mme Rosmerta jumped in to save them. "It's New Year's Eve, they don't want to be stuck talking to a couple old fogies like us. You two run along."

"Oh, but my shift," Natalia began to protest.

"Nonsense. You're shift is over. Go have fun, go on." She shooed the young couple away.

Igor didn't wait to be told twice and quickly pulled Natalia to a corner of the room. He looked down at her attired in a simple brown work dress with a neckline not overtly sexy but obviously designed for tips. Her hair was pulled away from her face. Her eyes were bright and her smile was genuine. It was in such direct contrast to the women at the ball.

"I hope you don't mind my barging in. I had to see you. Letters aren't enough." He looked down, embarrassed at his own declarations before deciding that they were not shameful and he should tell her everything he was feeling. "You must think I'm stupid but I cannot describe it. I feel so different."

"I know. I do to." She replied sweetly and his heart felt full.

The table they were standing next to erupted with laughter over some silly joke and the romantic moment was quickly derailed. Igor had no desire to listen to these drunks all night. He'd just left what felt like the same crowd of drunks albeit a wealthy well-dressed crowd of drunks.

"Can we go someplace a little less noisy?"

"Sure, my room is upstairs." She smiled slyly at him.

It was too good to be true, and he would not waste a moment before seizing the opportunity. "Perfect."

_AN: Bow chicka bow wow….. It's magic time….LOL Nuff said! My apologies if I didn't respond to your last review. I always do but have been remiss as of late. Will chat you up this week—promise Please don't withhold reviews due to my poor correspondence! It might kill me._

_Sorry so long since the last update. Embarrassingly enough, I've been quite absorbed in Russell Brand's "Booky Wook" which is a rib tickling guilty pleasure of a read. The subject matter is typical celebrity garbage but his vocabulary and general wit make it a hoot. Hugs to all! Happy President's Day in America!_


	30. Chapter 30 Nights in White Satin repris

CHAPTER THIRTY

Nights in White Satin (reprise)

_AN: While not graphic, there will be some sex in this chapter. If you are under an age where this is appropriate or otherwise offended by it, skip it and re-join us for CH31. If not, enjoy_

Natalia took him by the hand and led him up the rickety stairs to the rooms above the pub. The rooms above the pub weren't luxurious by a long shot. In fact most would say they were barely tolerable, fastidious cleanliness being their only redeeming quality. They were small, chopped up sections of what had once been larger suites in better times. Natalia's little room was dull and full of mismatched rickety old furniture. There was a tiny writing desk staged near a small but serviceable fireplace, a large wardrobe, a couple of straight-backed uncomfortable chairs and a large but ordinary looking bed. She did have her own bathroom, thank goodness for small mercies. She'd always been pleased with just having her own room and taken pride in keeping it tidy, but the moment she entered with Igor, she was ashamed of it. For to anyone else it would seem a depressing little room. Who would want to ring in the New Year in such a run of the mill place? Certainly Igor would not, he had just left quite possibly the most lavish ball in England tonight.

"Uhm, maybe we should go take a walk instead," she suggested.

"Are you barking? It's freezing outside." He walked past her into the room while gazing around and taking in his surroundings. "Incendio!" He waved his wand to light the fire and the warm light immediately improved the vibe of the room. He removed his jacket and tossed it carelessly on the chair.

Natalia eyed the vignette. His expensive tuxedo jacket draped over the chair by the roaring fire changed the scene from something depressing to something resembling a scotch advertisement. She looked down at her brown work dress and frowned, definitely not scotch ad worthy. However she smiled when she remembered what she'd worn underneath it. Rosmerta took her shopping the day after Christmas and insisted she stock up on knickers and other undergarments that someone like Igor might find charming. Natalia was embarrassed and annoyed with her meddling at the time but grateful in the moment. She wasn't sure where things would wind up between them tonight, but she was prepared either way.

For, ever since the night they'd spent together, she'd worried about how it had turned out. Igor had been forward that night but his liberties certainly didn't warrant the over the top reaction they garnered from her. He was probably very confused about her affections after that performance. Years of anonymous love letters and then she failed to follow through. He must surely think she was a cock tease, a term most boys reserved for only the most detestable girls. She knew she had to get over her fears and forget what happened with Lucius or Igor would surely move on to more willing companions.

Natalia watched him walk towards her looking at her as she'd always hoped he would and hoped she could engage with him and be in the moment rather than being dragged kicking and screaming back into her past with Lucius. Tonight she would not think of those bad times with Lucius. Igor was everything she needed. Things would be different this time.

From the pub below she heard the roar of the patrons as they began their countdown. "Ten, nine…"

"Almost midnight," he smiled taking her hands in his.

"Eight, seven, six,"

"It appears I'm not a moment too soon," His voice was smooth as silk, practiced, and tempting.

"Five, four, three."

Natalia, though never more cared for in her life, was terrified and the terror was audible in her quivering voice. "I can't believe you came here."

"Two, one"

"Believe it." He whispered before his lips gently touched hers. His kiss was adoring but tentative, as if he didn't want to press his luck. She closed her eyes and savored the moment, the sweet taste of liquor on his lips, his soft scruff gently grazing against her chin, and the aromatic heat coming off him as he held her close. His arms wound gently around her but rather than pulling her closer, he pulled back. She opened her eyes and gazed at him with a dazed expression.

"Happy New Year, Natalia." He spoke softly to her. "I predict we are going to have a wondrous year together."

The idea of him wanting to spend an entire year with her was an incredible prospect. No one had ever spoken of a future with Natalia, not even Lucius. Lucius's idea of a future was determining the location of his next wank. No, she would not think of him tonight. Igor was here because he wanted to be and not just for a one off but to be together over the next year. She felt warm and safe, as she had not in months.

The crowd of pickled patrons below finished a very loud and off key version of Auld Lang Sine, with a few voices hanging on to the final note much longer than required, followed by fits of drunken laughter. It detracted from the moment but only for a moment until their eyes met and they laughed at the silliness of it all.

Rosmerta must have wanted people to start filing out for the next song was a ballad. It was an amusing trick she would play, knowing if the music dragged that people would start to feel sleepy and go home. "Nights in White Satin", interestingly enough was the first selection. Had Natalia told Rosmerta about hearing that song in her head every time she saw or thought of Igor? She'd prattled on endlessly to her about him over the winter holiday and couldn't recall, but either way it amused her and she tried to stifle her giggles.

"I love this song." Igor proclaimed while confidently pulling her close for a dance.

Natalia laughed at herself. The memory of Igor walking into the great hall while she channeled the Moody Blues was quite preposterous and she briefly considered sharing it with him, but then thought better of it. He would surely think she was twisted or worse yet, a quidditch groupie. Perhaps one day she would tell him, but not today.

"What's so funny? Don't you like it?"

"No I love it." She tried to recover. "I just didn't have you pegged for a Moody Blues fan."

"Really just this song, although I do like a wide variety of music and books." He was such a natural conversationalist, never missing a beat as they swayed slowly to the music.

"I do as well. I wish more of us had an appreciation of muggle art and literature. I find it quite moving. Seems a shame to discount the contributions of an entire race simply because of their race."

He smiled broadly at her in agreement. "What's your favorite Muggle book?" He asked softly, still swaying her gently to the music.

"Jane Eyre." She answered honestly and innocently but was surprised to feel his spine stiffen at the mention of this work. "Oh don't you like that one?"

He frowned, "All poor girls like that book."

She narrowed her eyes. "Why do you say that?" The question was rhetorical for really, she knew precisely what he was getting at.

"That's the dream right?" He raised his eyebrows, still frowning. "Marry some rich bloke and rise above your humble beginnings."

It was Natalia's turn to stiffen as she pulled away from him. "Why you pompous arrogant, judgmental…" she sputtered reaching for more labels to throw at him. How dare he be so presumptuous, he barely knew her and here he was making assumptions due only to her financial circumstance?

"Whoa! Easy." He put his hands up in defense.

"You think everything revolves around money. Is that it?"

"No, I don't." He eased her back into his arms and kept his voice low to ease the tension. "But I worry that you do. You're always focused on it, always working. Why is it so important to you?" His tone suggested that he was merely interested and not implying anything.

"When you have to work for every galleon, you tend to focus on it." She practically spat at him, still angry at his offense.

He was suddenly serious and stepped away from her again. "Is that why you're with me?"

His question, so direct changed her mood. It was generated from his insecurities. He doubted her affections or at least the motivation behind them. She felt a kinship with him for she worried about his motivations as well. Still, this line of discussion had erected a barrier between them and her tone remained sharp. "No. Would you like me to dump you to prove it?"

"No." He traced the line of her throat with the back of his hand until reaching her chin and lifting it so his eyes met hers with an intent gaze. "But why are you with me?"

She smiled thoughtfully considering her response, wanting it to express what was truly in her heart and further solidify their connection. "You're down to earth, kind to everyone. You make stupid jokes but I think they are funny. I like to hear you tell a story even if I've heard it before. You're very intelligent and worldly." He was hanging on her every word and it amused her that he was so transparently interested in hearing about himself. "I admire the way you engineer the elegant architecture of your thoughts. Is that enough reasons?"

"Engineer the elegant architecture of my thoughts, I like that." His chest puffed a bit and he pursed his lips as he thought. "You forgot handsome."

"No I don't think I forgot. You know Mr. Rochester wasn't handsome by the way. You don't have a crazy wife in your attic do you?"

"No. No wife of any sort. But back to handsome. You don't find me handsome?"

"I do. Very much so. I also love that you care if I think you're handsome." She teased him lightly and he seemed to enjoy it.

"Ahh, that's why you don't tell me, you think I'm vain."

"Yes. You are so vain. You probably think this song is about you."

He laughed and pulled her against him. "My dear Natalia, you do make speeches."

"As do you. Oh by the way. You smell good, too."

"Mmmm," Igor held her gaze while gently stroking her hair until they seemed to be sharing the same breath.

His touch was so gentle and adoring almost tentative. Clearly he was trying to avoid scaring her as he had on the night of the Yule Ball. Never before had she felt so cared for. This man was a gift, the one thing she'd craved all her young years, the one thing Lucius could never live up to. Tonight she would not run from him, but embrace with her whole heart what he could bring to her spirit. Looking into his eyes, her fear disintegrated. She would run from him no more. "Kiss me Igor."

Without words, he obliged, softly, slowly, unhurried. She sighed and melted involuntarily against his body. She was at his mercy. Her surrender seemed to thrill him for his kisses became more urgent as his hands explored the curves of her body. The feel of her under his palms seduced him all the more, like the smell of delectable food to a starving man. His breath became heavy and he pulled her body against him looking for any way he could to be closer to her. Natalia conformed to his wishes, which were the same as his own. When she ran her hands under the back of his shirt and caressed his flesh, he groaned with pleasure. This thrilled Natalia, so desperate was she to please him, that his pleasure enhanced her own.

With great effort he managed to tear his lips away from hers. "Uhh, Natalia, you know I would never make you do something you didn't want to do. But I want you so badly. I'll wait forever but please don't make me. I swear I'll be so gentle with you. You know I would never hurt you. Please say that you know that." He buried his face in her neck and teased her skin with his lips. "So beautiful, so precious, so…"

"I want you too," she gasped. "I want you tonight."

"Yes." He groaned as the tension ebbed from his body, so relieved was he to have her permission.

Now it was her turn to be the aggressor. This was at least partially familiar territory and she began to approach it decisively like any other task. She wasted no time before she unfastened the top button of his trousers and slipped her hand down into his skivvies. It wasn't very ladylike to go straight for him but it was obviously what all men wanted and besides, she was dying to know. In his aroused state she became acutely aware that he was rather fortunate. In fact he was very fortunate. She actually worried he was a little too fortunate. She must have gasped or otherwise revealed her apprehension for he paused, pulled back, and held her gaze for a moment.

"I told you I would never hurt you." He whispered. "You believe that don't you? I'll say it as often as you need to hear it."

She nodded, a little embarrassed, and hoping she hadn't ruined the moment with her schoolgirl reaction to him. Desperately she wanted to please him, and her mind searched for things she thought he would find pleasurable. She remembered how Lucius used to get off on her talking dirty to him and decided he would probably like that as well. With a throaty whisper in his ear, she began caressing his member. "Oh Merlin you feel so good."

Igor's expression was confused and he chuckled nervously.

"Mmm, your cock is huge." She purposely inflected her voice to illustrate her burning desire.

"Natalia." His tone was slightly stern but she paid him no mind and continued.

"I can't wait to fuck you." She hissed as she began to stroke him, just as Lucius had always instructed her to do to him.

"Stop it!" He grabbed her shoulders and jolted her out of her performance. "Why are you talking like that?"

"Like what?" She honestly had no idea what he was talking about. Surely this was what all men wanted. She looked blankly at him and blinked. Then a sinking feeling started in the pit of her stomach. Obviously she had displeased him. Suddenly she felt very foolish and terrified. Of course he wouldn't want what Lucius wanted. Lucius was a sadistic manipulator and a pervert as well, nothing like the honorable wizard in front of her. What must he think of her now?

"Oh," he said with the kindest eyes that ever looked at her. "That's what your other lovers liked, wasn't it?"

Although his words were meant to be kind, they had a chastising effect on her. How could she have been so stupid? He was used to nicer girls, aristocratic, classier. She tried to turn away but he held tightly on to her shoulders. Her lip started to quiver and she closed her eyes tightly and lowered her head lest he see her cry.

"Natalia, you don't have to be ashamed. I'm not fool enough to think I would be your first. You're so beautiful. Look at me," he said softly while caressing her cheek with one hand. She looked at his lips and thought that the surrounding facial hair made them appear even more full. She wondered if she'd ever get another chance to taste them after the way she'd just acted. "No, right in my eyes." He pulled her chin gently until she had to look into those incredible brown eyes. His other arm pulled her tightly against him. He must have known she wanted to run away. "I'm not interested in acting out some pornographic fantasy. I just want to make love to the woman I adore. Eyes on me, darling." She met the gaze of his deep brown eyes and was again under his spell. He kissed her and sighed like he'd just tasted something good. "I promise I'll never hurt you or treat you badly."

With that his lips descended on hers in another slow warm gentle kiss as if he wanted to start over. There was no longer the urgency as now he again kissed her like he had all night. And in fact they did have all night. The realization of that made Natalia want to savor every moment and she now took her time lovingly kissing his neck and his chest.

He pulled back a bit, took her hand and led her over to the bed. His eyes fixed on her like he was hypnotized as they both sat down on the edge. "Is this okay?"

"Yes," was her quivering response.

Igor caressed her cheek and asked, "Are you sure? I won't lure you into doing something you don't want. We don't have to."

"I want to."

He asked no more questions but gently eased her back on the bed and began to trail warm kisses down her neck to her breasts. Deftly he undid the top buttons on the front of her plain dress until he was privy to the sight of her skin accentuated by the lacy black bra covering her breasts. Natalia responded by arching her back and snaking her fingers though his hair, holding his head right where it gave her the most pleasure. He lingered there; going over and over the same spot and finally she could take no more and pushed him away.

For a moment, he was afraid she was changing her mind, but she sat up and pulled his shirt over his head then tossed it on the floor, the buttons would have taken too long. He growled, eager to be flesh to flesh with her. He pushed her back on the bed and resumed kissing her breasts but this time expertly undid the clasp on the front of her bra with his teeth. Natalia laughed softly and he stopped long enough to lift his eyes to her and treat her to one of his devilish grins before he took her nipple in his mouth and began to tease her with his tongue. She whimpered beneath his touch, which only encouraged him as he moved to her other breast giving it his undivided attention. Soon she was writhing beneath him, a long dormant passion rising rapidly and taking over.

An insane desire for this man possessed her and she could no longer be a passive lover. She pushed him off and rolled on top of him. Now it was her turn to tease him and so she did, tracing her tongue down his stomach and planting a sweet kiss on his belly button before beginning to slide his trousers down. As she did this, she looked up at him and the look on his face could only be described as ravenous. When he was completely naked she stood up to shamelessly remove the rest of her clothing trying to be tactful, looking at his face and stealing quick glances at his impressive man hood. She smiled, turned her back to him and slowly and undid the remainder of the buttons down the front of her dress. She allowed it to casually slide off her shoulders and then removed her bra and tossed it so it landed on his jacket. Then she wiggled her hips until the dress slipped down to the floor. She stepped slowly out of the dress allowing him a view from behind before turning to face him. She was now clad only in black lace panties and thigh high stocking with black lace at the tops. She turned around and looked nervously at him, unsure what he would think of her body.

"Very pretty, but they have to go." He said with a smile, nodding at her panties.

Natalia bit her lip and slid them off, surprisingly feeling no shame in front of him. Then she moved her hands to her thighs to ease out of the stockings, but Igor reached for her hand and pulled her back to the bed.

"No, no, no, no, no, don't take them off." He pulled her into bed then rolled his naked body on top of hers. "Leave them on. Leave them on." He whispered before beginning his passionate assault on her lips.

The full weight of him on top of her gave her a feeling of security like she'd never had before. He would care for her, she belonged to him and no other. His hands seemed to be everywhere but she wanted more. "I want you Igor." She moaned in spite of herself.

"Patience my love," he whispered, but his hand was slowly moving up her inner thigh, agonizingly slow until finally he grazed upon her mound. His fingers parted her folds and into the slick sweetness of her that was his ultimate goal. "Oh Merlin," she cried under his tender touch, She had no idea it could feel this wonderful and now felt foolish forever putting him off. He would never hurt someone he loved surely he would not. He slid one long finger into her and she gasped again. "Oh Igor,"

"Ah yes, you feel so good. You're ready for me aren't you?" She remained lost in his touch pressing her herself into his hand and unable to respond. "Do you still want this? I only want it if you do."

"Yes, I want you." She whimpered under his touch.

Igor moved his hand away and repositioned himself on top of her, then kissed her deeply, slowly one more time. "Look at me, Natalia," She did as he asked looking into his fathomless brown eyes as he slowly, gently entered her.

The feeling was unparalleled, unlike anything she expected and she wrapped her legs around his to be closer still to him. He seemed to shiver for a moment, but his eyes remained transfixed on hers. Then a devilish smile crossed his lips and he began to thrust slowly in and out of her. This was nothing like the assault of her nightmares, this was loving and incredible and she never wanted it to end. She wanted more of him and arched her back to accept more of him, all of him. This seemed to excite him further and encourage him as his thrusts then became more intense and demanding. But she no longer feared him and grabbed his bum to pull him harder into her. It was not practiced but instinctual as her mind was becoming less logical every moment.

Something was happening to her, something desperate and wonderful. He felt so incredible inside her. Without making any conscious effort, she found herself breathlessly begging him. "Yes, oh please, Igor." She wasn't sure if she was begging him to stop or keep going forever. She felt like she was about to be thrown over a cliff, the terrified part of her wanted to stay on the land and part of her came closer and closer to jumping off just to see if she could fly. Finally they reached the apex and they jumped off the imaginary cliff together. Something happened, she felt like she was not in control of herself any longer. She was floating above her body. She gripped hard onto his bare shoulders as her legs gripped his lower back. It wasn't possible to get any closer to him and yet it was still not close enough. He must have felt it too for his arms remained tight around her as his seed warmed her inside. He pressed his cheek against hers while his hot ragged breath caressed her neck. His body remained rigid for several minutes and neither moved. Then slowly his body began to relax and she felt the tension leave him the same as it was leaving her. He remained motionless for a moment, then eased himself off her and rolled over on his back. She was able to breathe again. She hadn't noticed that she wasn't with his full weight on top of her but then her mind had been otherwise engaged.

Finally, after several minutes, Natalia collected her wits. "What just happened?"

Igor rolled over and propped himself up on one elbow to look at her, still breathing hard. His eyes were half closed, apparently still dazed. "We just had mind blowing sex," he replied absentmindedly while trailing his fingers from her breastbone, down between her breasts and then to her stomach.

"No, no. There was something else, something magical. I had the strangest feeling. Euphoria, maybe." She was breathless and had trouble articulating the sensation. "I felt like my mind switched off for a moment, and something like a charm or spell went through my body."

He continued to look at her as a naughty smile crossed his lips. Then soft laughter, deep and melodious rose form his chest.

This threw her off balance. Had she made a complete fool of herself? "What is it? What's so funny?"

"You had an orgasm." He spoke slowly. "You've never had one before have you?"  
>She was a little embarrassed, more about her naiveté than her lack of experience. She'd never had girlfriends to discuss such things with and assumed only men had orgasms. "Uh, no. Guess not."<p>

He erupted with a self-satisfied "Ha!" and wrapped his arms tight around her again before planting a quick but firm kiss on her lips. "I may not be the first man to make love to you, but I'm the first one to do it properly." He kissed her again, this time softly and slowly. "This is what it should be like Natalia. Every time. As long as you're with me, it will be."

And that is the precise moment when she knew she was in love with him and would be for the rest of her life. How could she ever love another? He was the one. She almost blurted it out but was afraid.

"What are you thinking about?"

"Oh um, I guess now I understand what all the fuss over sex is about."

He burst into laughter and his head fell forward, resting on her shoulder. His lips grazed her skin as he whispered. "I'm so glad I could be of service." He continued kissing her now working his way up her neck.

"Igor?"

"Hmm?" He never moved his lips away from her skin.

"Can we do it again?"

He raised his head to look at her, eyes now wide with excitement.

"Yeah."

_AN: Hope you enjoyed your lemonade as much as Natalia did….well maybe not that much haha! I wrote this chapter a while ago, but we just can't go rushing these things. I have lots more in store for both of them, some good, some not so good. I hope you'll stay tuned. Thank you to all who have this story on favorites or alert. I hope it's entertaining for you. Please be so kind as to leave your thoughts on this chapter, I love hearing from you! Shots of Firewhiseky for all. (Except Tina who seems to be nursing a jello shot hangover…I'll have Lucius bring you a draught) Thank you to Katiemarie090, my always insightful and incredibly efficient beta—big hugs!_


	31. Chapter 31 The Best of My Love

CHAPTER THIRTY-ONE

The Best of My Love

Igor awoke just before daybreak as light was starting to stream through the slats of the shutters on the only window. He took pleasure in the stillness of the early morning hours. Although at Durmstrang, they rose at dawn to begin various chores or practice flying before classes, Igor was always awake well before the others. He used this time to mediate in the silence and clear his mind. Today he used the opportunity to gaze adoringly upon the divine young woman whom he was fortunate enough to be sharing a bed with.

He propped himself up on one elbow and watched her sleep. Her dark lashes splayed out gracefully making her look like a sleeping porcelain doll. Her skin was so fair it seemed luminous in the shadows, and was further emphasized when next to his olive skin. The contrast between the two thrilled him for some inexplicable reason and his morning erection stiffened insistently.

It was no wonder she was still asleep as they'd made love several times that night, always Natalia begging for more. This both surprised him and thrilled him as he'd always seen himself as the aggressor when it came to sex. It seemed with women he and his mates would be forever trying to move in on women, and be confronted with a myriad of rebuffs, cock blocks as they jokingly referred to them. However Natalia was not the type to play games. She was brutally honest, and he was fairly sure she would not toy with him. This was quite reassuring to the seventeen-year-old Igor. His emotions were carrying him away and he was unable to resist leaning over to kiss her lips tenderly. Her eyes fluttered open and she smiled adoringly at him.

"So I wasn't dreaming." She greeted him languidly.

"No." He indulged himself in another delicious kiss. "Not dreaming. Better than my wildest dreams that's certain. You're beautiful in the morning do you know that?"

"I'm sure I have insane bed head." She reached up to smooth her hair.

"Your hair is lovely. You're lovely." Try as he might he couldn't hold back with her. He worried that these compliments might overwhelm her or seem desperate, but still he could not stop.

"You're quite charming when you choose to be."

He was called out, much to his dismay. "I'm not trying to charm you. I just…" his voice trailed off and he was unable to meet her eyes.

"You're just what?"

He was stumbling over his words. Instead of getting better, it was getting worse. He knew he would look pathetically needy in a moment, still he continued. "Natalia, I've never said this to a witch before."

"What?"

She was looking up at him with wide dark eyes that could easily seduce him into doing anything. He could not resist their pull and declared his feelings breathlessly. "I'm in love with you. I love you."

She stared at him for several moments and he was sure he'd bungled it. He was getting too close too fast, like some obsessed stage-five clinger quidditch stalker. It was mortifying and he could feel heat creeping up his neck.

"I love you, too, Igor."

_Ahh, a reprieve._ "You do? You aren't just saying that because I said it first and you don't want to hurt my feelings?"

"I fell in love with you the moment I saw you years ago. I've never been able to forget you."

He exhaled with relief and fell on top of her entwining his arms around her. "I'll take such good care of you, kitten. I swear I will."

Natalia giggled.

"Is that funny?"

"Kitten?"

He rolled off her and examined her expression. "What, you don't like my pet name for you?"

"Ah, no." She arched an eyebrow at him.

"Hmmmm, I'll work on it."

"Please do." She smiled and twisted a piece of his hair between her fingers. "I still can't believe you came to see me last night. Do you know how incredibly romantic that was?"

"Yes." He kissed her cheek. "That was the idea. I want to be your romantic hero."

Natalia giggled again and Igor knew he had her under his spell. To make a woman laugh was pure gold but to make a witch like Natalia laugh was platinum. He rolled on top of her again, his Alpha Male instincts coming back to him after the momentary lapse.

"I warn you, I am going to turn my full charm and attentions on you. I really don't think you have a chance in hell of resisting me."

"I have no intention of resisting you."

"I can't believe you're mine," he whispered against the skin of he neck.

They spent a long and leisurely morning together in bed, just talking, touching each other and enjoying their new found romance. The more familiar Igor became with her humor and sweet mannerisms, the more enchanted he became. His lavander obsession of many years had not been a vain pursuit, for she was a delight and he couldn't wait for more days, weeks, months and years with her where he could learn more about her and share everything with her. He was quite smitten.

Tragically, the morning came to an end when they heard the sound of the Hogwarts clock chiming twelve bells off in the distance.

"I have to go sweetheart." He kissed her on the forehead.

"No, sorry." She wound her arms tightly around him. "I don't think I can let you do that."

"Mmmmm, don't get me wrong I would love for you to take me prisoner, but I do have to get back home." Then an idea crossed his mind. "Come with me!"

"I can't. I told Rosemerta I would work tonight."

"Oh, she'll let you off. Please?"

"I already knocked off early last night."

"And wasn't it worth it?"

"Absolutely. But I shouldn't push my luck."

"You torture me. But I understand." Reluctantly, he crawled out of bed and began collecting his clothes that were carelessly tossed about the room. Natalia admired his lean form, broad shoulders and muscular buttocks. He was a perfect physical specimen. She was longing for him again and he hadn't even left yet.

"We'll be back at Hogwarts in a couple days."

He eyed her while he stood over her buttoning his shirt. In another moment, he wouldn't be able to leave. "And then we'll see each other every day. Promise me we will."

"We will." She smiled.

He finished dressing and then leaned over for one more indulgently long kiss. "I love you Natalia."

"I love you too Igor."

"I'll write you tonight."

"I'll write as well."

His porous heart swelled. "My love. I'll see you soon."

He gave her one last smile before leaving the room. Would her letters be more open and affectionate now or would she continue with trivial accounts of her day that left him guessing. Though most would say otherwise, he was at his core, massively insecure and needed her reassurances that this was real for her. He was deep in thoughts of what she might say in her letters when he bumped smack into his Headmaster coming out of Rosemerta's Master Suite.

Oblonsky gave an exasperated sigh and rolled his eyes.

Igor didn't know what to say. This was an awkward moment. It was embarrassing enough to be caught in a walk of shame after a night with a witch but to run in to your Headmaster who was doing his own walk of shame was an etiquette conundrum for which he had no words.

"Oh, uhm…good morning…I mean…good afternoon…Headmaster…I was just…I mean I…well I'm on my way home." Igor as stammering and hoping Oblonsky would not rat him out to his parents. Igor was obviously not at Malfoy Manor where he was supposed to be, and so was at Oblonsky's mercy.

"I am as well. The ship is docked at the Black Lake. Come on son." It was the first time Oblonsky ever called him "son" it was a little weird. They were not related.

"Oh, thank you but I was just going to apparate home."

"No, come with me. Help me get the ship back and then you can apparate home. I want a word with you. Besides, then you can truthfully say I asked for your help today and that's why you're returning so late in the day."

"Yes headmaster."

They left The Three Broomsticks and walked in silence towards the Black Lake. It wasn't until they were back on the ship and hoisting the mast that Oblonsky spoke to him.

"Miss Smith is a lovely witch. Quite pretty in the right light."

"Yes. I think so as well."

"Tell me Igor, what your intentions are with this girl?"

Igor tensed, for this conversation could go anywhere. "My intentions are quite honorable Headmaster."

"Really?" Oblonsky eyed him suspiciously. "Don't take this the wrong way but you've shagged everything from Siberia to Salem. What makes this witch so different?"

Igor looked down. He didn't keep his conquests a secret, nor did he correct people when they were embellished, a fact he now regretted. He knew his mates discussed them, but to have Oblonsky in the know was uncomfortable. He must have a very low opinion of him, and frankly, it was not undeserved. Igor decided to be honest with hopes of redeeming himself. "I'm in love with her headmaster."

"I see." Oblonskly paused. He glanced around the deck, ensuring they were ready to shove off, and then motioned for Igor to follow him below deck. He led him into the captain's quarters as they sailed out into the lake, and then submerged. "And have you told this girl of your affections?"

"Yes." Igor responded meekly.

"And her response?"

Oblonsky's matter of fact manner made him a little more comfortable. For once, he was not talking down to him. "She said she loves me."

Oblonsky reached into his desk draw and withdrew a cigar. He chomped off the ends with his teeth and spit them across the room, before lighting it and taking a few puffs. "Loves you, your fame, or your wallet?"

Igor was stunned. "I beg your pardon Headmaster?  
>"You heard me. Don't tell me you haven't considered that she would be using you. You've exploited plenty of women for your own satisfaction so answer my question, loves you, your fame, or your wallet? "<p>

"Loves me."

"Sure of that, are you?"

He wasn't, but wasn't about to say that to this nosey old man. "I am quite sure."

Oblonsky took a few more puffs and eyed his young charge. "You know sometimes caring for someone from a different background can be difficult. I don't want to see you make a mistake."

Igor felt a bit of sweat begin to break on his forehead. The room was quite close. He couldn't meet Oblonsky's eyes, but he was not going to be even remotely disloyal to Natalia and after what they shared. "You've always told me if I want to be successful I must never fear failure."

"That I have, but I was speaking of schoolwork, quidditch, and this tournament. Matters of the heart can be far more complicated. You should prepare yourself for that my boy. If you care about this girl, give her your whole heart or you'll regret it for the rest of your life, always wondering what could have been if only you'd done this or said that. I'd hate to see you wind up old, alone and bitter. You're so full of life and promise."

Igor had no idea what this man was up to but the conversation was far too personal and not entirely sensible. He made no response.

"All right then. I've made you uncomfortable enough. I want you to inspect everyone's quarters and report back to me anything that is amiss. By the time you are done, we'll be complete. And don't worry, I won't tell your father what you've been up to."

"Thank you Headmaster." Igor turned quickly to leave, anxious to get the hell out of there and go anywhere else. He had no idea why Oblonsky was so lucid and emotional today. However, if he had remained in the room he would have seen the man pull a picture out of his breast pocket and look at it. The photo was taken fifteen years prior, at another Yule Ball, where Rosemerta was young and beautiful, and gazing lovingly at him as they danced.

When Igor arrived home his parents were out visiting his Aunt and Uncle and so he was able to sneak back into his room without a cross-examination, or so he thought. No sooner had he changed out of his clothes from the day before and flopped onto his bed, his older brother Konsantine came waltzing into his room like had a right to be there. Konstantine was an inch shorter than Igor, but just as broad in the shoulders, however not as powerful looking, for he had not his brothers interest in sports and remained indoors with books and his adoring, but annoying and unattractive fiancé. They had been together since they were fourteen and he'd never been interested in another. Igor pulled a pillow over his face and feigned sleep to avoid speaking to his brother. Konstantine yanked the pillow right off his brother's face and started in on him.

"You borrowed my dress robes without asking." He snapped.

"Mine don't fit anymore." Igor pulled the covers over his face.

"So that gives you the right to take mine?" Konstantine ripped the covers off him.

"You weren't wearing them." Igor growled. "I'll have them cleaned and right back to you."

"Keep them." Konstantine walked over to the chair where Igor tossed his clothes, picked up the shirt and examined it. "There's lipstick on this collar."

"So?" Igor snarled like a typical little brother.

"So who's is it?"

"None of your business."

"Sasha's?"

"None of your business."

"I run into Lucius quite a bit, I'll find out."

Igor sighed; he didn't want him snooping around in his affairs. "It's not Sasha's. I told you, that's over. It never really started."

"Who's then? Anyone special? I'm only asking because I'm concerned for your happiness. Ever since I found my Anna, I've been blissfully happy and hope the same for you one day, once you're done with your youthful indiscretions."

Igor was dying to talk to someone and although his brother could be quite arrogant and bossy, he respected his opinion. "Can you keep a secret?"

"I am the pillar of discretion. You know that."

"I'm in love."

"Love?" Konstantine seemed surprised and Igor already regretted telling him anything.

"Yes."

"Not with Sasha?"

"No, another witch. She is perfection."

"Father won't like it. Mother really won't like it. They have plans for you Igor. The family has plans for you. You can't go getting led around by some random witch."

"She's not some random witch." Igor was furious at himself for baring his soul to his judgmental brother. He should have known better than to trust him.

"Have you told father?"

"No, and don't you go sticking your hook nose into my business either."

"I'm not getting into that." Konstantine walked casually over to the mirror over Igor's dresser and examined himself. Igor smirked knowing that Konstantine was looking at his nose to see if it truly appeared hooked. "Why haven't you told him yourself?"

"I will eventually."

"You've something to hide. Have you been fooling around with those half-blood peasant girls again?"

"No." Igor snapped. Why did his brother always assume the worst? "I met her at Hogwarts. She's in Slytherin."

"Slytherin? Sounds promising. Obviously she's from a fine family."

"She's of no family." Igor snarled defiantly.

"What do you mean no family?"

"She's an orphan."

"Oh, wonderful." Igor saw him roll his eyes in the mirror before his brother faced him again. "Do you even know her blood status?"

"No. But none of that makes any difference to me. You should see her, she's stunning and smart and hard working. She knows more about quidditch than most men I know. I'm telling you she's damned near perfect."

"Not perfect. Father will never permit it."

"It's not his choice. This is my life and I'll not spend the rest of it in a passionless marriage."

"What's that supposed to mean? Don't you dare start in on our mother."

"Relax. I'm not. Mother is wonderful. It's just…well…don't you notice it?"

"Notice what?"

Igor shrugged, unsure what he meant himself. "The absence of it."

"No. I have not. I'll keep your secret brother but only because I believe you to have the attention span of a gnat and know this will be over quickly. There's no need to get our parents worried over nothing. She'll be out of your system quick enough once you've fucked the life out of her for a few months."

Igor sprang out of bed and pounced on his brother, slamming him against the wall. "If I ever hear you speak of her that way again, I'll level you. Do you understand me?"

Konstantine shoved him off. "Forgive me," he hissed while straightening his robes. "I forget how your testosterone carries you away where ladies are concerned. Just don't pick up something you can't get rid of."

After Konstantine left, Igor threw on some old clothes and went out for a flight on his broom to clear his head. Why was everyone so against them? Why couldn't people just let them be? He would refuse to let anyone come between them. Natalia meant everything to him.

_AN: Poor Iggy, it started out as such a good day too. Hope everyone had a great week! Thanks for all the reviews last week—I was thrilled to have so many of you take the time to review this little tale. DH1 is in the background at the moment…I hate that one…not enough Snape….Love you all!_


	32. Chapter 32 Black Magic

CHAPTER THIRTY-TWO

Black Magic

Natalia sat in silence at the Slytherin table with her housemates during breakfast on the first day of school. Despite returning to the bustling school, she felt quite isolated. Severus had been avoiding her since they returned the prior evening, and for some reason seemed to be glued to Regulus Black's hip. However, Natalia had never been afraid of solitude and simply went to bed early so she could begin dreaming of her new Russian love. The Durmstrang students did not return until well after lights out the night before and so she had not yet seen Igor, which was maddening. She couldn't wait to be alone with him again. She could still hear his warm, comforting, heavily accented voice resonating in her head. After the night she'd spent in his arms, she'd been unable to focus on anything else. Every waking thought was occupied by fantasies of him. However now she was back in the reality of Hogwarts and the mundane-ness of her day. It all seemed so far away. How would they blend their daily lives? Could it even be done?

"Hallo beautiful." She was so deep in thought that she hadn't noticed Igor entering the great hall until he was right beside her. He squeezed in next to her sitting close enough that the other Slytherins began to stare. The sudden close proximity to Igor in front of her housemates caused her to blush. He was terribly charismatic and the mischievous twinkle in his eye when turned on her rendered her speechless. "I'm sorry I couldn't see you last night. We docked very late." He brazenly caressed her cheek with his palm while weaving his fingers in her hair. The other Slytherins were now openly gaping at them, so shocked by the coupling and the public display at the breakfast table, that they didn't bother to disguise their curiosity.

Natalia was terribly uncomfortable in the spotlight and began to bristle under his hand. Igor was so enraptured at seeing his lovely again, that it didn't cross his mind that this would be uncomfortable for her. He hadn't noticed that the English didn't wear their emotions on their sleeve as he did. Despite his perceived worldliness, he was still young and had much to learn about witches, particularly a witch like Natalia.

She shifted in her seat and glanced nervously over his shoulder to find the curious eyes of Regulus and the disapproving smirk of Severus. Several other heads were turned towards them but she quickly looked away before she recognized them.

"Mmm, you smell so good." He whispered before pulling her into his kiss. Though there was nothing Natalia adored more than kissing Igor Karkaroff, his flagrant disregard for social norms in the middle of breakfast in the Great Hall was bloody inappropriate. As the Slytherin girls were so found of remarking, "It simply wasn't done."

"Igor, stop it." She admonished while pushing him off in a huff.

"What's wrong?" A childlike expression of bewilderment overcame his face. The Slytherins continued to stare, further fueling her embarrassment. Everyone was looking at them, presumably wondering what someone like Igor was doing with someone like her. It was far worse than the night of the Yule Ball when such behavior was expected. How could he put her in this position?

Roughly she pulled his hands away from her face. "Just stop." As soon as she said it, she regretted her lack of tact for his expression changed to hurt. He looked like someone had just told him there was no such thing as Santa Claus. Then his back stiffened and his jaw set tightly.

"Oh I see." He smirked, rolling his eyes to the ceiling and leaving them there. He sighed hard before looking back at her again. "Unbelievable." He lowered his gaze to the floor, avoiding her eyes and shaking his head slowly. "You know, I've always thought you were better than this. I guess I was wrong." Without further explanation, he extracted himself from the table and left her.

Natalia sat there dumbfounded with not the foggiest idea what he was talking about. Surely he knew what a spectacle he was making of the two of them. Or maybe he didn't. She watched him stalk off angrily, and then turned to Severus as she often did when she felt lost.

"Well….what did you expect?" he snarled haughtily with one eyebrow suspended higher than the other. He was no help at all.

Without knowing what she would say if she caught him, she scrambled out of the Great Hall after him. "Igor wait." She called, now not caring if she attracted attention, for he meant the world to her.

Outside the hall, he turned to face her with the same pained expression, but he stopped and he waited. Her heart vibrated nervously in her chest, not knowing what to expect or how to comfort him.

"Igor, please don't run away from me." She reached for his hand, and held it between her two smaller ones. "Talk to me."

He looked down at their clasped hands and sighed heavily. "Are you sure you wouldn't rather have this conversation in private so you don't have to be seen with me?" His jaw was still tightly set and she knew he was not to be trifled with.

She blinked several times and furrowed her brow. "Don't have to be seen with you? Igor, what are you talking about? What are you implying?"

He raised his chin and seemed to be trying to muster some dignity prior to speaking again. "I know our relationship is unconventional. I'm not stupid. Look I thought this was something different between us, but if you're ashamed to be seen with me…"

"Ashamed to be seen with you? What in the world are you talking about?"

"Don't play dumb Natalia," he snapped, "It demeans us both. Do you think I can't see what's happening here? The way you pushed me away in front of your Slytherin friends." He hissed at her, now seeming more angry rather than hurt. "I know what that's about. They'll look down on you for being with someone different. Oh I get it, don't worry; I've met your kind before. Go back to your countrymen. I'll trouble you no more." He turned to go but she held tight to his hand and did not let him.

She was quite blown away by his laddish tirade. The very idea seemed rather silly, though as she reflected on how her behavior must have appeared, he was not unjustified. "I'm not ashamed of you." She sputtered and worried that she sounded unconvincing. She squeezed his hands and pulled him a little closer, whispering. "How can you think that after…after New Years Eve? Why would you?"

"That night was a private moment, only for us." He responded like a petulant child. "As soon as we're out in the open it's a different story isn't it?"

"No! No it's not." Natalia pleaded desperately with him. "If that were the case why would I have gone to the Yule Ball with you?"

"Then what's the problem? Hmmm?" He seemed angrier still, nearly accusing her. "I haven't seen you in three days and you completely pushed me away."

It shocked her that he was this needy, this reliant upon her. "Igor I couldn't wait to see you, but you just can't put your hands all over me in the middle of breakfast. Everyone stared at us. Now they'll be talking about us. I'm not ashamed of you but I have no desire to be front page news or fodder for the gossip hotline."

He growled a bit but he was still listening.

"I just…look you're accustomed to being in the spotlight. I'm not. I just want to be in the background. I'm not comfortable with it. No one drapes themselves all over their significant other like you just did. They'll all think we're…"

"But we are." He whispered, raised his eyebrows naughtily.

She felt her thighs go up in flames. Merlin he was sexy. She paused, distracted by her own desires, but quickly remembered herself. "But it's none of their business Igor." Natalia shook her head violently, trying to be firm. "Why do you have to make sure they know it? Are you marking your territory? Are you that proud of your conquests?"

His eyes grew wide at the word. "Conquest?" He was now raising his voice, and heads were turning again to see who the conquest might be. "That's what you think you are to me? A conquest?" Igor was red-faced, furious, and their argument was now attracting even more unwanted attention.

"Igor, please lower your voice," she hissed through gritted teeth. "I'm begging you to lower your voice."

"I'm in love with you Natalia. That's all." He stood up straight and tall, seeming to attempt to gather as much dignity as possibly. "And I don't give a damn who knows it." He cast an arrogant gaze around the room at everyone and no one.

Natalia stood dumbfounded before him.

"I never meant to embarrass you." He shrugged and waited for a response but none came. "I apologize." He turned to go but again she held fast to his hand. He turned back to face her waiting for kinder words. Slowly she took two steps toward him, then put her arms around his waist and rested her head against his broad chest.

"I'm sorry Igor. I'm not ashamed of you, quite the opposite. You just took me by surprise."

"Shhh, it's all right," he whispered, wrapping his arms around her. "I over reacted. I just missed you I guess. I'm afraid I'm quite moody. Levin would tell you the same."

"It's all right. I guess I was rather brusque." She breathed a sigh of relief, now content in his protective embrace.

"Can I make it up to you?" He lifted her chin until her eyes met his.

"Maybe." Natalia smiled coyly while dying to hear what he had in mind. However she would have to wait as another quarrel was erupting a mere twenty feet away from them.

"Severus! Wait!" Sasha Malfoy was running after Snape as he stalked out of the Great Hall. She finally caught up to him and still had to grab him by the arm to get his attention. "Please I just want to talk to you."

"What?" He snarled, whirling around on her.

She flinched and blinked several times before asking, "What happened to you?"

"What are you babbling about?" he said not bothering to disguise his annoyance.

"The Yule Ball? I waited for you. I was so disappointed. What happened?" Her voice sounded like that of a small child.

"Oh that." Snape responded with a roll of his eyes.

Sasha was visibly wounded and the normally confident girl responded with a whimper. "Did you forget?"

He narrowed his eyes but raised his chin haughtily. "No Miss Malfoy I did not forget. I was never going. The only reason I told you I'd go is to shut you up."

"Shut me up? Why would you…I don't believe you." Sasha shook her head in vehement denial as the tears started to roll in spite of her best efforts.

Maybe it was the sight of her tears, or maybe he just didn't want to be hassled, but something caused Snape to snap and he began his assault. "That conceited are you?" he sneered.

"No Sev, I just thought"

"Thought what?" he snapped, cutting her off.

Most of the other students began to walk away, the intensity of the moment, making them uncomfortable and embarrassed. However Natalia and Igor remained, each still holding fast to the others hand.

"I just," Sasha was stammering and couldn't get the words out.

"Spit it out." Snape had a head full of steam and there was no stopping his attack now. "Thought what? That I would be dying to go with you? That I would be grateful that _Princess Malfoy _threw me a crumb? You spoiled little prat! You and your marauder buddies think this place rises and falls with you. Well it doesn't!" He turned to go.

"Severus, stop. Please. I thought we were friends." She sobbed.

He whirled around grabbed her by the shoulders and slammed her hard into the wall. Her head hit the stone so hard it made Natalia wince. He had a death grip on her shoulders and was an inch from her face as he spoke slowly with venom in his voice. "Get this straight NOW! We are not friends. We never were. I don't need your friendship. I don't need anyone. I've chosen my path." He let go of her and quickly pulled up his sleeve to show her his newly acquired dark mark. She tried to scream when she saw it but no sound came out of her mouth. "Say away from me. You're a filthy little blood traitor and your entire family is ashamed of you, as they should be."

Natalia felt Igor's body tense and he moved toward them but Natalia, horrified after a glimpse of the dark mark pulled him back. "No Igor. Don't interfere." Igor frowned and looked back at the pair, incensed by Snape's treatment of Sasha whom he thought highly of, but his assistance would not be needed.

"Expelliarmis!" Seemingly from out of nowhere, came the heroic voice of Sirius Black.

"Oh that's typical." Snape, now wandless, turned quickly on his assailant and looked like a snake about to strike. "Afraid of a fair fight are you Black?"

"Not at all." With that Sirius tossed his wand over his shoulder and tackled Severus. Both of them fell to the ground. Severus, never one for anything muggle was unprepared to defend himself. He got off one shot to Sirius' eye and was then easily overpowered. Sirius pounded on him, bloodying his nose and splitting his lip before Regulus and Remus Lupin appeared and pulled them apart.

"You'll pay for that Black!" Snape shouted as Regulus pulled him in the direction of the Slytherin dungeons.

"Just you fucking try it Snivellus! I'll beat the dark magic out of you till your fucking mother won't recognize you!" Sirius looked like a wild man as he tried to break free from Lupin's grip to attack Snape again. It would take Sasha and Lupin's full strength to pull him back to the Gryffindor common room. He was swearing and spitting the entire way.

Severus however shook off Regulus and left on his own accord. Regulus followed, as did Natalia with Igor in tow. They got as far as the stairwell before Severus stopped and turned on them. "What the hell do you want from me?" The blood was streaming out of his nose and his eyes were crazed. One cheek was branded red from the hand of Sirius. The three stood in stunned silence. Igor reached into his pocket, removed a handkerchief and handed it to Snape. It was snatched out of his hand and Severus used it to wipe the blood off his face before spitting a gob of blood onto the floor.

Only Natalia approached him. She took three tentative steps toward him and touched his arm. His eyes snapped up to meet hers. "Oh Severus. What have you done?"

He jerked away from her. "It's the smartest thing I've ever done. No more will I be subjected to adolescent taunts from those filthy blood traitors. I have the power now!" He pounded his chest for emphasis.

"Really?" Igor, always brash and belligerent chimed in. "Because it didn't look like you had the power back there. Unless you think you need a dark mark to push girls like Sasha around."

"Shut it!" Severus stood toe to toe with Karkaroff. "The time is rapidly approaching when you will all have to make a decision on where you stand. If you're smart, you won't oppose him!"

"I don't need a bunch of outcasts banded together to fight my battles for me. Sounds like some life or death version of a pissing contest to me."

"Don't…cross…me." Severus said low and cool before whirling around and continuing down the stairs with new black robes billowing behind him.

Regulus nodded to them both and without a word, followed his friend.

"Merlin's Beard!" Natalia sighed when they were out of earshot. "This is bad Igor, I mean really bad."

"Idiots." He scowled after them.

"I can't believe this. How could he do something so stupid?" Natalia fretted and paced back and forth. "Have you heard about these people? They're so dangerous."

"He was backed into a corner I suppose. That's frequently why people sign up with racist organizations. They target the disenfranchised and offer them a sense of belonging. It's a textbook example."

"Who would want to belong to that band of pirates?"

"Apparently your friend Severus."

"Oh I thought I knew him better than this."

"Well it's done now and we can't undo it." Igor shrugged as if he didn't understand the gravity of the situation, or perhaps that he didn't care.

Natalia heard the bell chime eight. "Oh no I'm late for class. Fuck it all!" She turned to go but he stopped her.

"No so fast. I've not seen you in three days, then we had an argument, and now this debacle. If we don't make plans for tonight, I may damn well go mad."

Natalia sighed. As usual she had little free time. "I have to work in the lab."

"I'll help you." He pulled her closer and gazed at her with heavily lidded eyes.

Natalia was so drawn in by him. When she looked into those dark eyes, all the worries in her life fell away. "I'd love it. Seven o'clock in the potions lab."

"It's a date." He looked up and down the stairs lest someone see them and she be embarrassed again, then he kissed her. "Try not to worry. I'll see you tonight."

Natalia was unable to focus on much that day. She was consumed with anxiety for her friend Severus. For everything she had heard about those bearing the dark mark was ominously suspect. Ever since Lucius told her he'd chosen to follow Lord Voldemort, she'd kept her eyes and ears open but, information was only underground and details were sketchy. The Daily Profit was cowardly, publishing only innuendo and gossip. The hushed tones of patrons in the pub were far more decisive and far more terrifying. She heard of disappearances, rapes and torture. She heard of intimidation, of coercion and dark magic. The thought of Lucius involved in such business was disheartening but after what he did to her, not surprising. The thought of Severus involved in such things was devastating. How could he align himself with such characters?

It also appeared to her that Regulus was somehow mixed up in all of this. That should not have shocked her considering his parent's beliefs and affiliations, however she'd always thought he had a better head than that. She now understood the distance between he and his populist brother. But if someone as intelligent as Regulus and Severus could get sucked into such a movement, what of Igor. Could he be far behind despite his assurances to the contrary? By the time Igor came round the lab that night, she'd worked herself up into a pretty good lather.

"Hallo Kitten."

"Oh Igor, I thought you'd never get here." She ran to him and impetuously threw her arms around his neck.

He was pleasantly surprised at this outburst from his normally reserved Natalia. He wished she would greet him like this always so that he could be sure of her affections. "What's this? And I was worried I'd get your usual cool reception." He laughed as his arms wound round her and he inhaled her lovely scent. She didn't respond other than to grip him more tightly. "Mmmm, I like this manner of greeting," he murmured and kissed the top of his head.

Natalia looked up at him in earnest, "I feel much better when I'm with you."

Igor's heart melted, for he wanted to take care of her, and it felt good to be needed. He was always the coddled, the one in emotional need, but he now craved being the one who was needed. He relished the challenge. "What's troubling you? Is it what happened this morning?"

"Yes, I can't stop thinking about it. What has Severus done?"

"Something quite foolish in my opinion but it seems everyone is doing it."

"Everyone? I assure you not everyone agrees with what that mark stands for."

"This pure blood mania…it's running through our school like a fever. I don't know any current students that have joined him, but many of our alumni have, so it's only a matter of time. I've been approached myself."

"What?" Her face contorted in fear. "When? By whom?"

He pulled her close again. "I said no. It doesn't matter."

"Yes it does."

"No, it doesn't. I would never join them. I don't agree with them at all. Many of the people in my part of the world know only their own little corner of this earth. So they fear anything different muggles included, particularly foreign muggles. I've traveled all over this world because of quidditch and I can tell you people are the same, magical or not. So it doesn't matter what they say. I don't agree with them and so I'll not be joining them."

"I don't think it's always that simple."

"Of course it is."

"They might force you, find some angle."

"No, no, no. Now I don't want you to worry your pretty little head about me kitten. I'm my own man and I don't need some macabre mob to help me make my way in this world like Severus."

"That's surely why he did it. He felt isolated. Now he has instant back up."

"Hmmm," he squinted, considering her perspective. "I don't think that's it entirely. I've tried to befriend him before but he remains cool to me. I think he's so insecure about himself, that he is unable to elevate himself. He has to push others down instead. There are loads of people like that out there. Trust me the quidditch analysts are the worst. Most of them never played a day in their life, but they critique my play like experts."

"Oh, don't talk of quidditch now. Promise me you'll never join them."

He lifted her chin gently and brushed his thumb across her lips before bending to plant a tender kiss. "I promise." He kissed her one more time to seal the pact. "Those people will never intrude into our lives."

And so she trusted him.

AN: So our dear Severus has gone over to the dark side but not our hero Iggy. Not him. No. Never. Sorry for the delays this week-technical difficulties on my part...as they say in IT...user error. Hope you are enjoying the awesome weather in America this week. Spring has sprung!


	33. Chapter 33 You Don't Bring Me Flowers

CHAPTER THIRTY THREE

YOU DON'T BRING ME FLOWERS

As the next few weeks went by, Igor and Natalia spent as much time as possible together. Igor studied with her in the library. If Poppy allowed it, he helped her in the infirmary, and he also tagged along to help her in the potions lab. He liked helping in the lab the best for Slughorn rarely made an appearance and so they could be alone together. He could steal kisses and if she was in the proper temper, she would allow him further liberties. However it wasn't enough. She still frequently told him how much she cared and he believed her. However she was never totally focused on him. There was always work or school looming in the background. He was not used to having to compete for a woman's attentions. Generally his prior girlfriends were only too happy to drop what they were doing for him. Natalia was far more driven. This was a quality he found admirable, but now it was getting in the way and he found himself increasingly resentful of her ambitions.

This particular Saturday afternoon he was practicing quidditch with his mates. The weather was unseasonably warm the last few days. The snow and wind had subsided and everyone who could was out enjoying the milder weather, knowing the opportunity to do so would be brief and they would soon be back inside huddled against the cold winds.

Despite the fine weather Igor was in an uncharacteristically foul mood. Oblonsky had authorized a bonfire on the lakeshore tonight and he was reticent to ask Natalia for he knew it would be a fight. She was to be working in the lab yet again tonight. Although he liked being alone in the lab with her he was naturally gregarious and enjoyed large parties. He wanted her to spend some time with his friends so they could get to know each other and she could become part of their social circle. Truth be told, he wanted to show her off a little too. He was thrilled to be close to her, finding her beautiful, intelligent and witty and wanted everyone to see what he saw in her. But he knew she was highly driven and would resist his efforts.

He sighed with resignation. The quidditch was boring him today. He was stuck playing keeper, which he loathed, but he and Levin were trying to develop some of the younger players so that Durmstrang would still have a decent team after they left school for good at the end of term. Defense was boring. He hated waiting around for something to happen and merely reacting. He liked offense and the control it offered particularly if he felt out of control in another area of life like he did today.

He heaved another bored sigh and glanced over at Natalia who had promised to come watch today. She was there in the stands but had her nose in the books, not watching him. His shoulders tensed. Logically he knew that at keeper he wasn't doing much at the moment that warranted watching, but it was just one more example of her not focusing on him. He adored this girl, and needed her desperately why didn't she feel the same. She said she loved him, but she didn't appear to need him as he did her, and that was killing him.

He was so preoccupied with watching her; he didn't see his opponent swoop in for a shot. It went right by him unnoticed until his mates started whooping and laughing. They were laughing at him not with him, which was enough to set him off. Natalia took her nose out of her book long enough to look up at him with a confused expression.

Levin swooped in beside him. "Little preoccupied today?"

Igor responded with only a grumble.

"Well I suppose we've all had enough. What say we knock off and walk to town? Ask Nat if she wants to go and I'll ask Fiona." Levin nodded in the direction of Fiona who sat in the stands not far from Natalia. Her eyes never left Levin and she waved grandly when his head turned in her direction. Levin waved back with an enormous Cheshire cat grin spread over his face. Igor looked back at Natalia with her nose still in the books and was now positively incensed.

Igor knew how this conversation was going to go, but he replied to Levin, "Fine," leaned forward on his broom and flew down to address Natalia. She smiled when she saw him and the effect was disarming. He didn't want a fight with her, quite the contrary. Oh, why couldn't she just give in for him just once? His stomach was fluttering.

"Rough morning up there?" She gave him a sympathetic smile.

He found it irritating that she would point out his failings right from the start. Why not, 'nice morning' or 'it's good to see you'? No, 'rough morning,' it was annoying but in his mood anything was annoying. Why couldn't she ever look on the bright side? He sighed hard in attempt to push negativity out of his chest and forced a smile. "Oh who cares? It's just practice. Besides, it will help build confidence for our younger players. Gorgeous day isn't it?"

"Hmm? Oh yes. Yes quite nice. I'm sure it will turn cold again soon though."

Once again, looking for the down side. He pressed on. "Well let's take advantage of it while we can. How about we walk to town, sit outside at The Three Broomsticks and enjoy a butter beer?"

"I have a charms essay I have to write." She replied with a frown.

"You can do it tomorrow. Let's enjoy the day. Please Natalia. I want us to have some fun. You've been working so hard you deserve it." He smiled hopefully at her.

"Igor really I would love to but I have to get the first draft of this essay done. Please understand." She looked up at him apologetically. "But you go and have fun and I'll see you in the great Hal for dinner."

"There's a bonfire tonight. I want you to come with me." Igor's invitation was extended with a tone of defiance. He was daring her to say no.

"Igor you know I have to work in the lab tonight. It's Saturday and I have to get everything ready for Monday classes tonight so I'll have time to study tomorrow."

"Damnit!" Igor spat. "You plan on working all day tomorrow too?" He raked his fingers through his windblown mop in aggravation. "When do I come in huh? Am I ever penciled in to your busy schedule?"

Natalia linked twice but stared at him utterly astonished. She proceeded with caution. "Igor we've spent as much time as we can together since we got back." She looked a little scared but he had a head full of steam and was undaunted.

"But you never have time for just me! I'm always an afterthought." Igor hissed like the self-centered adolescent that he was. "All you ever want to do is work, work, work. I want a girlfriend, not someone I have to make an appointment to see!"

"I was under the impression they were dates." Natalia's surly response set him over his argumentative edge.

"Dates?" He raised both eyebrows haughtily while his lip curled up in unison. "No my dear a date is two people setting aside time to do nothing but enjoy each other's company. That is NOT what we have been doing. Every time I want to see you, you have something else more important to do. It's me tagging along while you make absolutely NO concessions or efforts to change your plans. Our relationship is completely one-sided!" He abruptly shut his mouth and straightened his spine, giving the impression that he hadn't meant to let that comment sneak out.

"One-sided?" Natalia's voice was barely above a whisper.

Igor did not respond and his face remained impassive. He had not meant for this argument to go this far. He thought he could cajole her into making more time for him, but his emotions once again got the better of him and now, he was getting into dangerous territory. The silence grew larger until Natalia broke it again.

"You think this relationship is one-sided?" She whispered to him again, this time with a little more strength in her voice.

Igor considered her question carefully and the truth was, yes, he did feel it was one sided. She was always pushing him away; at least that's how it appeared to him. He was a footnote not part of the plot in her life. He crossed his arms and sighed heavily. "Yes. He said calmly. That is how I feel. I'm tired of having to compete for your attention."

Natalia's eyes grew wide and he knew he'd wounded her. At last she understood him. Let her feel how he was feeling, that was the key. But his confidence was dashed again when her eyes narrowed and her brow furrowed, signaling the beginning of her verbal assault.

"You're tired of it?" She paused but he was smart enough to know it was a rhetorical question. "So YOU"RE tired of it. Well I'm so sorry that YOU"RE tired of it, but you see this is MY life. I don't have time for parties or bonfires, or anything else but school or work. Nothing is handed to me Karkaroff. I have to work for all of it."

He winced when she called him by his last name.

"Oh why did I ever think this would work with you? I'm so stupid. I thought that if we cared about each other, we could make this work. But I should have known better. We come from very different worlds. How can I expect you to understand what I have to go through every day around here? You, who have been coddled at praised and adored your whole life, how could you have a fucking clue what my life is like?"

"I know what your life is like Natalia, but I'm sick to death of hearing about it. Life is tough. It isn't fair. I know all that, but I'm here to help you change all that, to get you to relax to have some fun." The pleading tone in his own voice made his stomach churn. If there was anything he hated, it was playing defense and it was always what he ended up doing with her.

"Sick to death of hearing it?" She repeated his words indignantly. "Well don't worry. I won't subject you to it any longer."

Oh no, this was not going according to his plans at all. He reached for her hand but she jerked away. "Enjoy your bonfire." She spat before marching back to the castle.

The bonfire that night was anything but enjoyable for Igor. He hung about on the outskirts of conversations finding none of them particularly interesting. Most of his mates from Durmstrang had invited female guests, so they were otherwise engaged in trying to get the witches away from the bonfire and into the seductive darkness. A few others from Hogwarts had made their way down to the fire, mostly Slytherin and Ravenclaw with a smattering of Hufflepuffs and witches from Beauxbattons. Due to Potter being Igor's competition, none of the Gryffindors attended, apparently in an effort to show some kind of solidarity. Sasha, however was there and charming all the single wizards and a third of the ones with dates.

He watched her a bit as he lingered on the edge of the crowd sipping away at a bottle of Irish whiskey. She flitted around from conversation to conversation, never overstaying her welcome, always moving on and leaving them wanting more. He snickered to himself thinking that was the way he normally worked a party. They were similar in so many ways. She was a beautiful woman, but she wasn't the one he wanted. The thought of Natalia made him tilt the bottle back for a long drink. He'd hoped the whiskey would push her out of his mind, but it was having the opposite effect.

He looked up at the castle, with warm light glowing from various rooms. It seemed to beckon him, but after their argument earlier, he knew if was an illusion. "I am NOT going to her. I am NOT going to her," he repeated in his mind. He could not cave in. If he let her win this, nothing would change and it had to change. He shook his head to rid himself of her and searched around the party for a distraction. His eyes once again rested on the lovely Sasha. No, not good, tempting and lovely, but entirely counterproductive. He shook his head again, and tried to think about something besides sex. His eyes found Regulus and Severus sitting across the fire engaged in a lively discussion with some of his mates. Presumably they were talking politics. Politics, perfect! That would distract him. He loved to argue. He took one more long drink and approached the group on unsteady feet.

A Slytherin named Mulciber was speaking. Igor didn't like that bloke one bit. He was sadistic and mouthy. Igor heard that he was quite cruel to magical creatures, frequently practicing dark magic on them. The scuttlebutt was that last year; he'd even put two Hippogriffs under the imperius curse and had them battle each other, however nothing was ever proven. Abuse of innocent creatures was something Igor found inexcusable and he felt himself already getting pumped up for an argument.

"Well for one thing, you can never trust these mud bloods." Mulciber was sneering as Igor approached. "I mean even the witches can't be trusted. They have no character, no morals."

Igor snorted loudly at this. Mulcibier was one to talk. He had a terrible reputation.

"Got something to say, have you, Karkaroff?" Mulciber glared at him. Most people were too afraid of this sadistic tool to challenge him. Igor however thought he was all mouth and was itching for a fight. He was drunk enough not to care if he got the tar knocked out of him and really felt compelled to hit someone until he felt better and they felt as bad as he did.

"Oh you're doing a fine job making speeches Mulciber. But then that's all you lot ever seems to do. All talk and no action. However I'm sure it helps get you laid." Igor raised his bottle in a facetious toast and took a long swig, then grinned mockingly at Mulciber. A smattering of snickers rippled through the crowd, mainly from Igor's mates who had seen him in action before. Regulus rolled his eyes and moved to stand closer to Mulciber. His ally was pre chosen despite what he may think personally of Mulciber. Igor smirked again.

"Don't beat around the bush Karkaroff, spit it out!" Mulciber took a few steps closer to Igor.

I'm not besting around the bush. I'm saying very plainly that you're ilk does nothing but make ridiculous speeches in a feeble attempt to impress the ladies." Igor towered over him.

Mulciber growled at him but looking up, he appeared to know that he was over matched. He turned and began to walk away.

Igor found his adversary's lack of courage infuriating and continued his goading. "Of course with a puss like that, it's the only way you're getting any." The crowd erupted with laughter and catcalls while Igor smirked and giggled, to himself. This shit was too easy. Mulciber whipped around on him, wand drawn, but Igor was in no mood for a duel and recalled the altercations with Snape and Black a few weeks ago. "Expelliarmus!". Mulciber was disarmed and the brawl was on. He tackled Mulciber to the ground punching him several times in the face before he was overpowered and Mulciber was on top of him. He took a few blows to his body and actually let him get off a few more than he should have but he wanted to be hit. He wanted to feel pain besides the pain he was already feeling. However when Mulciber went for his face, vanity won out and Igor wrestled his way to the top again. This time he was driven by drunken fury and began choking his opponent. He was so bloody angry that he was losing control. "Igor, stop it!". He heard Sasha scream but he ignored her.

Finally he felt himself being pulled off Mulciber. Struggle though he did, there was more than one person pulling him off. It was Levin and some Ravenclaw bloke whose name escaped him. "Let me go!" Igor yelled. "If he wants a fight, I'll give him a fight!"

"This is a party. No one wants a fight ." Levin's tone was calm and Igor snapped out of his rage long enough to see that everyone was staring at him in shock. It was embarrassing. He had deliberately picked a fight and spoiled everyone else's good time all because he was feeling miserable over Natalia. He jerked out of Levin's grasp and straightened his clothes while all around people continued to gape. He looked down at Mulciber on the ground, heaving for breath with a puffy eye that was sure to be an impressive shiner by tomorrow. He was mortified, drunk and suddenly feeling more lonely than ever. With a heavy sigh he held out his hand to Mulciber to help him up. Reluctantly, Mulciber accepted and Igor pulled him up to standing. Igor looked around the party and announced, "My apologies. Please enjoy your evening.". He turned and snatched a random liquor bottle from a surprised Huffelpuff and stalked off towards the castle.

The Ravenclaw that helped break up the fight turned to Levin, "What is wrong with him?".

"My money is on pent up sexual frustration." Levin quipped.

"Ah..." said the Ravenclaw with a shrug. Both rejoined the party without another word.

Natalia was just finishing up in the lab when she heard a knock at the door. It certainly wouldn't be Slughorn. Why would he knock at his own classroom door? She had a sinking feeling she knew exactly who it was and doubted she was up of yet another argument. But she had no choice but to answer the door. And there here stood, reeking of liquor, hair and clothes a mess from fighting, sexy drunken smile and hooded lids, a complete and utter mess and yet she adored him.

"Hallo kitten. Fancy an orgasm? Cause I knock 'em out like for free."

_AN: Hope everyone had a great holiday. I'm finally getting caught up on my story again and promise to post more frequently. Hope you liked this chap even though they are hitting a bump in the road. Anyone recognize the movie quote? I will be very grateful if you could please leave a review as they keep me motivated. Butter beers to all:)_


	34. Chapter 34 Slow Ride

CHAPTER THIRTY FOUR

SLOW RIDE

"I see you enjoyed yourself this evening." Natalia tired to respond bravely despite how scared and hurt she was. She could tell by one look at his disheveled appearance that Igor was obviously and thoroughly pissed. He reeked of liquor and was now here at the door of the lab presumably for what would in later years be dubbed a "booty call."

"Not as much as I would have liked," he slurred with a sly smile. "May I?" He pushed the door to the lab open a bit further and moved closer to her. Natalia shuddered with worry. Men could be quite unpredictable and volatile when drunk. She had enough experience with patrons at The Three Broomsticks and most notably Lucius to know when to exercise extreme caution. "Are you finished for the night?" Igor mumbled as he sauntered into the lab and dragged his finger along a table. He found a chair and took a seat, then he leaned back on the back two legs, took a long drink from his whiskey bottle and propped his feet up. "Ahh," He shook his head and winced as the liquor burned through his chest.

"You're drunk." Natalia remarked flatly.

"How perceptive." Igor grinned at her. "All that time in the infirmary is paying off. You have correctly diagnosed my condition." He giggled and took another long drink, wincing again.

Natalia turned without a word and walked over to a row of cabinets. She opened one, scanned the vials on the shelf and removed one. Then she walked over to him and slammed it down on the table before him. "Drink this."

"What's this?" He looked up at her mischievously as one corner of his mouth curled up into a naughty smile.

"It's a draught that will sober you up." She replied flatly.

"What if I don't want to sober up?" His rebellious streak was coming out.

"Then you're going to have a raging hangover tomorrow. Oh, don't mistake me, you'll definitely deserve it, but I still hate to see you suffer."

"Deserve it? You think I deserve a hangover?"

"Well, you certainly look like you've earned it."

He giggled again. "That I have." He smirked and raised his bottle to her. He was about to take another drink when she snatched it out of his hand.

The shocked look on his face was quite priceless, but she was in no mood to see the humor in it. "Igor please don't. I don't like to see you like this."

His eyes narrowed. For the moment, he was unable to see the thoughtfulness in her actions. "You're the cause of it."

"Please don't say that." Her voice quivered a bit. "I don't want to be."

"But you are. Natalia, I know you're angry with me but at least tell me you understand. I just want more time with you, time when your attentions aren't divided. Tonight at the bonfire, I was so lonely. I wanted you there. Natalia..." He was slurring and rambling, he knew it, but he couldn't shut up. "I want you to share my life." He opened his arms wide for emphasis, but when he did, it threw his balance off and the chair tipped backwards sending him crashing to the floor and hitting his head. He groaned loudly.

"Oh Merlin!" Natalia rushed over to help him up. "Did you hurt yourself?" She took his hand and helped him up to a standing position.

"Just my pride." He grumbled, now feeling like an idiot. This was not going as planned.

"I want to share your life Igor." Natalia whispered.

The pain in her eyes made his stomach flip knowing that he was the one causing it. "Then make time for me Natalia," he pleaded with her. "Make time for us. We're young. This is the only time we have to be irresponsible." He raised his hand to stroke her hair, but held it there tentatively, not sure of her present boundaries.

"I can't afford to be irresponsible Igor," she said quickly. "I have to work. I have to study hard. I have nothing to fall back on."

"You have me." He now moved to stroke her hair, hoping the warm gesture would help her to trust him. "I'll take care of you. I'm all for studying but you're constantly working. Please, I'm begging you to cut back. If it's money you need, I have loads. Just say the word and I'll..."

But she cut him off angrily. "I don't want your money."

He gaped at her for a moment. "Why was she angry? He was only trying to help. "What? No. Natalia, you misunderstand me."

"That's what you think isn't it? That I just want your money? You said so on New Years Eve." She began to pick up steam.

"What? No. I asked. That's all." He held his palms up in a defensive posture.

"You listen to me Karkaroff." She shook her finger at him much like his mother and aunts used to do when he was a little boy. "I don't need your money. I don't want your money. I can do fine on my own without someone bankrolling me."

"Of course you can. I didn't mean..." but he was not permitted to finish his sentence as she stormed out of the room leaving him alone with his whiskey bottle and a pile of regret.

"Fuck!" He hissed to himself. No matter what, he couldn't seem to be able to get it right with her today. Why was she so sensitive and why couldn't she make an effort to spend a little quality time with him? He didn't think he was asking much. It didn't seem to be a problem with Levin and Fifi or any of the other couples he knew. Why were they so different? He rose, pocketed the draught for later use, turned out the lights and left the room.

The castle was large and dark, and if he hadn't had such a solid sense of direction, he would most certainly have gotten lost. However his internal compass never failed him, and before long he found himself outside and approaching the ship. In his drunken state he found himself staggering down the hill, falling twice. He was frustrated with himself. Why couldn't they get it together? He had made a mess of it today. He should never have broached the subject. He should have just let it be. But it was bothering him. It still bothered him. Wasn't that what you were supposed to do in an adult relationship; talk about what bothers you? Women always said they want to talk more. He wondered if perhaps it only works when they were the ones doing the talking. He sighed, looked up at the moon and then drank the last swallow in the bottle before chucking it into the lake. He decided not to take the draught until morning, preferring to remain intoxicated so he could hide in his self induced haze until he drifted off into sleep. He removed his boots before he climbed the gangplank onto the ship. Although one of his mates would be on guard duty and let him pass without incident, it would never do to alert Oblonsky. Unfortunately, that was who he ran into on deck.

"Ah, Mr. Karkaroff, back to our old habits of breaking curfew again. Pity, I thought Ms. Smith was a better influence on you." Oblonsky was there to confront him.

"Oh shit." Igor slipped, unable to watch his mouth in his current state.

"Yes, oh shit." Oblonsky replied sardonically. "I heard you made quite a spectacle of yourself this evening, an obnoxious drunk picking fights. Honestly Mr. Karkaroff, I thought you had finally grown out of all these childish antics." Igor looked down and did not respond. As agitating and demanding as Oblonsky could be, Igor was loathe to displease his headmaster. His nerves got the better of him and much to his chagrin, he developed a noisy case of the hiccups, the first one serving as his pickled response.

"Charming," Oblonsky quipped with a roll of his eyes. "Well I see why you're dateless. Miss Smith doesn't strike me as the type to tolerate such foolishness. You know,I had a sad feeling that you would squander this opportunity eventually. So tell me, was it the drinking or the fighting that finally put her over the edge?" Igor did not respond , but for a hiccup that once again betrayed his condition. "Out with it. I want to know. Or perhaps it was your general lack of discretion." Igor huffed and tried to summon some dignity.

"She has no time for me. All she does is work and study." Oblonsky smirked.

"Most people would find that an admirable trait. Unless of course they were so completely self involved that they can only see the short term effect rather than the long term benefits such as prosperity and a good education. And you seriously gave her a hard time about this?"

Igor frowned. When put that way it really made him sound like a selfish bastard. He started to feel ashamed of himself. Here was Natalia working her fingers to the bone to make something of herself and all she got from the person who professed to love her the most was whining about parties and not getting enough attention. "Yes sir." He managed to mumble.

"Then you are not the young man I had hoped you were. Go to your quarters and sleep it off."

Igor did so without hesitation, anxious to get away from Oblonsky and be alone with his misery. He stumbled to his room, tossed his boots and jacket across the floor, and flopped down on his bed. They were both right about him. His behavior was childish. He pulled the draught out of his pocket and downed it, not wanting to be intoxicated anymore. Oh, Natalia, he ached for her more than ever, What had he done? Was the damage beyond repair? Tomorrow he would do some serious groveling. If he was persistent, perhaps she could forgive him. He closed his eyes but sleep did not come, for he felt physically ill with worry.

In her bed in the Slytherin dorm, Natalia too found sleep evasive. Perhaps he was right, she should make more time for him just him. She was taking him for granted by just assuming he would tag along while she worked. Other girls were practically lined up to take her place if he chose to move on. What was she thinking? Truth be told, with the money from Lucius she could cut back just a bit and still have enough money for university. But what if it was already too late? She had completely flown off the handle tonight and walked out on him. She could still see the hurt in his handsome face as he tried to express himself through his haze, a haze he chose to get over their argument. Thinking about it now made her sick. She couldn't let it go till morning, she had to see him now.

Oblonsky sat on the deck of the ship looking at the moonlight shining on the lake,smoking a cigar and musing about Rosmerta. How much time they had wasted. When they were young, their situation was quite similar to that of Igor and Natalia. He hated to see his wayward yet by far his favorite student make the same mistakes.

He heard a noise at the gangplank and turned. Levin, who was on deck pulling guard duty turned, wand drawn toward the noise and ready to strike. "Who goes there?". He shouted according to protocol. As they both watched, Natalia pulled herself on deck. Oblonsky smiled to himself as he watched the impetuous girl nervously address Levin. As usual, Master Karkaroff was about to be granted a reprieve.

"Oh Levin, I know it is a terrible breach but please I have to see Igor. Please just for a minute. We had a terrible fight. Please I have to talk to him. I promise I won't be long."

"Nat, it's after midnight. I can't let a girl on my ship."

"Please, I won't be long." She ignored his instructions and climbed aboard the ship, putting herself unknowingly between Levin and Oblonsky. Levin looked nervously past her to his Headmaster. Oblonsky allowed far more latitude than these boys, particularly the older ones deserved. He nodded curtly toward the hatch, then turned so that he technically did not see her enter.

"All right." Levin sighed. "But you both owe me. Down the hatch, fourth door on the left. Don't be seen. If you are, I'll deny ever seeing you tonight."

"You're the best." Natalia hustled down the hatch.

Igor was still awake when he heard the knock at his door. It was either Oblonsky back to give him another ration of shit or Levin to tell him how far he got with Fifi. Either way he was not In the mood. Unfortunately, he had no choice but to open the door.

When he did however, he got the most delicious surprise. Natalia looked up at him with her beautiful brown eyes that appeared to plead with him. She was biting her lip and her eyes were puffy as if she had been crying. "Oh, Igor I'm so sorry.". The words poured forth from her lips and washed over him like a baptism.

Without a word he pulled her into his arms, into his room and shut the door quietly. Sanctuary.

"You were right," she continued. "I have been taking you for granted. Oh darling I'm so sorry. Please give me another chance. I swear I will cut back my hours. We can have more time together. As much as you want."

Her ador was overwhelming and he was speechless, but held her tightly while his fingers wove through her hair. He breathed in the comforting scent of lavender and nuzzled his lips against the skin of her neck.

Her face was buried in his chest as she continued to murmur, "I love you Igor. You mean everything to me. Please forgive me."

"Shhhhh," he whispered into her ear before planting soft kisses on it. "Everything is alright now. You're here in my arms and everything is perfect."

"I'm sorry I made you angry Igor. I should have been more understanding."

"Enough Natalia, I am the one that should be apologizing." He lifted her chin with the light touch of his index finger. "I behaved like a spoiled prat. I should have been supporting you in your efforts not trying to distract you."

"I'm going to tell Slughorn I can't work for him any more. He can get a younger student to do the work. I can still work with Poppy if you'll allow me. She's more understanding and flexible with my hours."

Her tone made him uneasy. "Whoa, allow you? Natalia you don't need my permission. Despite what you might think from my recent behavior I am not some barbarian that you have to clear everything with."

"I don't want to displease you." Her sweet expression could never have displeased him. It was all he ever wanted.

"Hey, you are here in my arms and we have reached a compromise. I couldn't possibly be more pleased than I am in this moment."

"Natalia looked up at him with a naughty grin. "I bet you could be a little more pleased."

The breath left his body before he knew it, and his cock suddenly twitched to attention. "Oh you think so Miss Smith?" He pulled her towards his bed as she gazed wantonly up at him.

"Oh I know so Mr. Karkaroff. Muffilatto!". She waved her wand to cast the muffling spell and continued to move towards the bed until he was backed into it.

"Muffling charm," he snickered. "Planning on getting loud?"

"That was for you actually." She pushed him down on the bed. Igor growled and pulled her down on top of him.

"Ah, my kitten likes to play. What did you have in mind?"

Natalia ground her hips against his until a groan escaped him. Then she breathed into his ear. "Fancy an orgasm? Cause I knock 'em out like for free." Igor laughed loudly before pulling her lips to his and claiming her mouth for his own. She kissed him back with a fury, an intensity that he hadn't felt in her in weeks. His tongue caressed hers with indulgent passion as the heat built between them. All the longing and frustration of the past few days were at last being quenched and the most incredible part was that it was she who was unleashing herself on him. She wanted him as badly as he wanted her and that was extremely gratifying. His hands roamed freely over her body and slipped down the back of her pajama bottoms. He thoroughly enjoyed caressing her backside. But it was she who was the aggressor tonight. While her lips never left his, she worked furiously to unbutton his shirt and pull him out of it. As soon as he was out of it, she sat up and arching her back slowly peeled off her Slytherin sweatshirt revealing perfect breasts that he immediately reached up to caress. She moaned softly under his touch, arching her back further and grinding her sex into his erection.

"Ahh Natalia, I want you.". He made to sit up but she grabbed his wrists and forced them back down, restraining them on either side of his head against the sheets.

"Let me drive tonight," she whispered. "I want to spoil you." She bent down and began kissing the smattering of dark hair across his chest. His breath caught in his chest before he sighed in contentment, reveling in her ardent attentions. Her hair trailed down his stomach following her lips all the way down to the top,of his trousers. She undid his belt with agonizing slowness. His breathing became ragged with anticipation before she finally pulled off his pants and boxers in one movement. Then she stood and shimmied out of her sweats revealing that she was wearing no panties. His eyes swept over her form ravenously.

"Merlin you are hot.".

She giggled before brazenly straddling him. Miraculously, he remembered the contraceptive spell and cast it quickly before tossing his wand aside. She grabbed his wrists, and gently restrained them again.

"I told you I'm driving tonight." She began kissing his chest again working her way to the spot where his shoulder met his neck. "Do I have to tie you up, or can you follow instructions?" Her naughty proposition thrilled him. He'd never had a woman speak to him this way. Was that deviant? Perverted? Unmanly? Did he care? He should care. But he didn't. No he didn't care one bit, for the feeling of being restrained under her grasp was erotic and thrilling. He was happily at her mercy.

"Even the finest silk scarves could not compare to the beauty of your touch,' he breathed.

"Good answer." Natalia whispered before bringing her lips to his and kissing him hungrily. "Do you want me?"

"Yes, so badly."

She raised her hips then lowered them slowly, sheathing him inside he, while watching his expression. He couldn't help but close his eyes momentarily for the pleasure was so great. Then he opened them again to find her slowly riding him,while he lay there still restrained in her tender trap. She bit her lip and closed her eyes seemingly savoring the feel of his cock inside her. But she was sitting up, too far away from him. He wanted more of her skin against his, but held down by her, he was deprived of it. It was erotic torture and he begged her, "Kiss me Natalia.". She did laying her body down on his chest and pressing her warm flesh against his. He groaned with pleasure, tasting her lips on his, feeling her tongue probe his mouth while she continued her slow rhythm against his hips.

Without warning she pulled her lips away sitting up to ride him again. This game of denial was over for him. Testosterone was coursing through his veins and he acted on his own desires. With a quick jerk he wrestled free of her grasp and sat up, pulling her against him so their flesh was once again together. Natalia giggled softly. "Just couldn't take it could you?"

"I hate playing defense." He murmured before gently grabbing a handful of her hair and pulling her lips to his again. His tongue invaded her mouth this time like a conquering army, no more sweetness, he wanted to own her. His free arm wrapped around her lower back and he pulled her hard against him. She moaned into his mouth and he knew she was as lost in him as he was lost in her. He controlled the rhythm now pulling her slowly but firmly back and forth. When he finally allowed her mouth the freedom to catch her breath, she tilted her head back and moaned again, closing her eyes and arching her back.

"Say my name," he demanded.

"Igor." she moaned breathlessly. She was coming undone over him which he found incredible. He was nearing the brink himself and now grabbed her hard by the ass and thrust his manhood deep into her hot core.

"Yeah, take me deeper. Take all of me Natalia."

She moaned her wordless response which encouraged him further and now he was fucking her hard, hard and deep and mad with passion.

"Come for me Natalia. I want you to come hard for me."

"Yes."

"And speak my name when you come. I want my name crossing your lips while you feel the ecstasy I give you."

Her body tensed and he felt her clench around him. "Igor." The sound of his name was his undoing. His seed shot into her bringing him the ultimate release. He clung tightly to her, one hand fisting through her hair again while the other remained tightly around her back. They were motionless for several moments before he flopped back onto the bed pulling her down on top of him.

"Merlin's fucking beard I love you!"

"Ha! Well that's romantic." She giggled.

"It is romantic. This whole night is romantic. You have no idea how you affect me Natalia. I can barely understand it myself."

AN: Igor...can that name possibly sound sexy? I guess if you're breathing it in the throes of passion, it can. Hope you enjoyed their little encounter. Thanks so much to Shelley for being my stand in beta this week and showering me with chocolate frogs and Iggy art! I now have the most awesome drawing of Iggs and Nat-promise to post it soon!


	35. Chapter 35 Beast of Burden

CHAPTER THIRTY-FIVE

Beast of Burden

A chill was back in the air on the morning of the second task. As the wind whistled around the tent, Igor paced nervously back and forth in his private section of the champion's tent. After his miserable failure at the first task, he was a basket case. He simply couldn't disappoint his Headmaster and mates again. If only Natalia were here with him he might be able to focus. His kitten as he liked to call her had a calming effect on him. Whenever she was away from him, he felt like something was missing and he was preoccupied with seeing her again.

"Igor." He whirled around when he heard her whisper. "Are you alone?"

He smiled broadly and pulled her into his private section of the tent. "Not any more kitten."  
>He wrapped his arms around her and immediately felt his body relax as if he'd been given a sedative. "I'm so glad you're here."<p>

"Don't be nervous. You're going to be great today!"

"I don't know." His breathing was labored as he held her tightly. "I don't know if I can do it Natalia."

"Yes you can." She pulled away from him and looked up to meet his worried eyes. Gently, she held his face in her hands. "You know exactly what to do."

"No." He shook his head furiously and looked down, not wanting to look her in the eye. The shame of his poor performance in the last task still haunted him. "Too many people. What if I fail again? What if I disgrace my school? Headmaster Oblonsky would never forgive me."

"Igor, you're not going to embarrass anyone, you're going to win." She pulled his face gently so he had to look her in the eye again. She seemed to be searching his face for something. "What's the matter with you? You've always loved being in the spotlight. You play quidditch in front of enormous crowds all the time

"That's different. I have my whole team." He shuddered with the new fear of disappointing Natalia too. The pressure was getting to him. He wanted to take her and get as far away from this place as he could.

"Darling, you're just a little tense. Try to relax." She moved her hands from his face and rubbed his shoulders.

"Grrr. I can't." He growled in frustration.

Natalia moved closer to him and began running her hands over his thighs. "I bet I can relax you."

"I don't think so." He was wound so tight he didn't even respond to her touch.

"Oh really?" She slithered up against him and boldly began to touch his member over his trousers.

"Wha...what are you doing?" He took a step back. The stimulation combined with stress was too much for him. "I have to go out there in fifteen minutes."

"That's plenty of time." She kissed him with force as her hands found their way to his belt buckle and began to undo it. He quickly pushed her off.

"Natalia! Have you lost your mind?"

"No." She kissed him again and felt his resistance starting to give way. She finished his belt and undid the top button to his trousers.

"Natalia, we can't" But his heavy breath suggested that he felt they absolutely could.

"Relax baby. Sure we can," she hissed as she got down on her knees and began to kiss his stomach.

He groaned as she moved lower, never able to resist when sexually tempted. "Oh, all right," he breathed. "Maybe we can."

Fourteen minutes later Igor was much more relaxed. He slouched against the wall, utterly spent while Natalia stood up roughly pulled his trousers back up.

"Ahh, easy." He jumped, pulling his hips back and decided to do the zipper and button himself.

"And now from Drumstrang, Igor Karkaroff!" The announcer bellowed outside.

"Shit!" He quickly finished fastening his trousers while she worked on tucking in his shirt. He shuddered and pulled himself together, smoothing his hair (always with the hair) while she tucking his shirt in. He squared his shoulders and she knew he was in the proper zone, with enough confidence to win it.

"Listen to me." She grabbed his cheek roughly in one hand and turned his face to hers. "You're Igor Karkaroff, pride of Durmstrang and poised to become the Tri-wizard champion. You're such a bad ass, you just got a blow job from a student from an opposing school just minutes before the second challenge. Now get out there and win it."

He grinned impishly and kissed her quickly on the lips, beaming at her with the conceit she adored in him. "And what do I get if I win?"

"We'll see what you're up for big guy. Get going."

"Ha!" He barked before marching out of the tent with a new, stronger resolve. It was amazing what a little sex could do. He felt so healthy.

Igor strode out onto the field to the roar of the crowd. The loudest cheers came from the Slytherin and Durmstrang boxes, and he waved confidently to them as he swaggered over to join the others who were standing with the Headmasters, and Isaac Whipp who was head of the International Games Committee.

Whipp was tall with a very dark complexion. Despite the lack of sun in the country, he remained perpetually tanned. His hair was cut short and conservatively and he kept it slicked back off his face. He initially gave the impression of being a rather slick and oily character, however when he spoke his voice was kind and comforting. Igor liked him immediately. Whipp patted him heartily on the back in such an innocent fatherly way that made Igor feel guilty for the naughty pre-game he'd just indulged in, but only for a second.

"Ah just look at you all, perfect specimens of the best of our magical youth. Gather round' now." He brought the champions gently into a huddle with their Headmasters behind them for moral support. "Today's contest will test your ingenuity, ability to tame animals, and battle strategy."

Igor felt confident already for he was at the top of his class in History of Combat, always had a way with animals, and was confident in his ability to figure out any puzzle he was presented with.

"Hidden in the forbidden forest are three sacred objects, one from each school that is vital to the preservation of your heritage and also the future of your school. From Beatxbatons, the Chalice of Reason which allows you to see where your choices are leading you, from Hogwarts, the sorting hat that places you within your school family, and from Durmstrang, the Mājas Kompass, which will always bring you home.

"This is an outrage!" Oblonsky flew into a rage. "I never authorized the use of a Durmstrang artifact! How dare you be so presumptuous as to..." but Oblosky was cut off by Whipp.

"Your permission is neither sought or required." Whipp looked down his nose with disdain. "This is a difficult challenge, without something precious at stake, the champions may be tempted to give up. For the good of the contest and now for the good of your schools, they must soldier on."

"Ow deed you get jyour hands on zee mirror?" The Beatxbatons Headmistress was every bit as furious as Oblonsky.

"Never you mind" Whipp hissed right back at her like she was a man. "Worry about getting it back."

Potter looked up at Dumbledore earnestly and was rewarded with a fatherly pat on the back. "I trust you my boy. Do your very best and we have nothing to fear." He winked at the young man. "I won't let you down Professor." Potter said with conviction.

Igor found himself being the one to reassure his Headmaster rather than the other way around. "I've got this. I promise you the Kompass will be returned to you unharmed. It has deep meaning for me."

"Don't bungle it." Oblonskly hissed before leaving the field with the other teachers. Igor rolled his eyes. Sometimes he envied the Hogwarts students for having such a cool Headmaster.

"This way champions." Whipp pulled them towards the center of the field. In a circle, and sitting on platforms were various magical creatures. There was a surly looking grindylow, next to him a kappa who was puffing up to appear larger than his neighbor, a manticore sitting up tall and straight swishing his tail back and forth looking utterly unconcerned, a beautiful snow white unicorn, an enormous bluish gray hippogriff, and on his own tiny little platform the tiny little owl that delivered Natalia's correspondence. When the little owl saw Igor he hooted excitedly and bobbed up and down. Igor smiled back at his little friend. Oddly, one large platform was empty.

"Each of your school artifacts are hidden deep in the forbidden forest and heavily guarded. You must figure out how to retrieve each of them. You may choose one magical beast to help you. The first champion to emerge with his object will be the winner. Choose your companion swiftly and wisely. You have two minutes."

Igor began to size up the beasts against what he thought he would need to complete the task. Whipp hadn't given them much to go on other than the objects were hidden and heavily guarded. Guarded by what, he wondered. Any number of beings and beasts were known to inhabit the forest. He said they were heavily guarded which implied large numbers.

Potter wasted no time in choosing the Hippogriff. Igor watched him bow to the beast in a successful attempt to gain his trust. The Hogwarts boxes cheered but behind him he also heard the Durmstrang box erupt in angry jeers. They thought Igor's hesitation cost him the best beast.

But Igor would not be rushed. He was quite analytical when it came to games of skill, and wasn't so sure the Hippogriff was the best choice. Depending on what was guarding the objects, he may or may not be able to muscle his way through. He considered the remaining beasts while watching Fiona with some curiosity. She approached the empty platform and reached up to touch some imaginary beast. A smattering of cheers and gasps came from behind them. She appeared to coax something off the platform, although he still could not see a thing. She approached Whipp, her choice apparently made.

"One minute Mr. Karkaroff." Igor nodded and looked back at the remaining animals. The grindlylow and kappa were definitely out. Neither beast could be trusted. The unicorn while beautiful was not considered a fighter. That left the Manticore and the little owl. The manticore should have been his obvious choice, a powerful and intelligent creature, but something told him to choose otherwise. He looked back to the owl who once again bobbed up and down when their eyes met. Igor smiled back at the little puff. He was never afraid of a risk and learned many years ago to always follow his gut instincts, to trust his intuition. He associated the bird with Natalia and felt it would be good luck to have him along. If it was speed or flight he needed, he could summon his broom. That wasn't mentioned in the rules so he was surely free to do so.

He raised his arm and nodded to the little bird who flapped his little wings and flew directly to Igor. In contrast to the cheers for Potter, his choice was met with laughter. "Laugh now," he thought. He had a good feeling about today. He was in love and felt invincible. He turned back to the Durmstrang box to see Natalia sitting with Levin. It gave him a warm feeling to see his girl and his best friend together. Levin shrugged and furrowed his brow with an expression that could only mean, "What the fuck are you doing?" Natalia gave him an encouraging smile and two thumbs up. She thought he made a good choice and she was an excellent strategist. He was feeling more confident by the moment.

Whipp waved them over. "You have a maximum of two hours to complete the task. If you don't return from the forest by then, we will send a search party to retrieve you and you will receive no points. Understood?

"Yes." They all nodded.

"Very well. Mr. Filch, on my count of three you will sound the cannon to signal the..."

Boom! Filch misfired and Potter was off like a shot on the back of the Hippogriff zooming towards the forest. Fiona quickly mounted whatever invisible beast it was that she chose, and did the same.

Igor raised his wand. "Accio Firebolt!" He reached up and placed the little owl on his shoulder. "Ready to go for a ride little one?" The little owl warbled and bounced up and down again. Igor's broom came flying towards them and he reached up with his other hand to catch it. "Hang on."  
>He mounted his broom and with his companion on his shoulder, quickly flew towards the forest.<p>

The students were all cheering as he easily caught and overtook Fiona. Nothing could compare to the speed and power of a premier league grade custom Firebolt, the best money could buy. He was immediately feeling good about his choice as he was quickly catching up to Potter who was having difficulty maneuvering the large beast between the trees. Igor, his broom and his companion were built for speed. He laughed loudly as he passed his second opponent for no other reason than to mess with his head.

As he flew deeper and deeper into the forest he lost light, the trees were massive and blocking the sun. The forest had an eerie glow to it. He'd become separated from the others some time ago and had no idea where he was going. To his right, far off in the distance he heard male voices arguing and a screech. It was unmistakably a hippogriff. Igor pulled up on his broom to a stop and quietly dismounted. His little companion hooted, but Igor put a finger to his lips. He smirked to himself thinking that the owl probably didn't know what that gesture meant, but it was quiet just the same.

He crept through the forest, towards the noise, his entire body in a heightened sense of awareness. The cries grew louder as he approached. After some time he came to a hillside and found Fiona crouching in the brush, peering over the hill down into a clearing.

"Fifi." Igor whispered.

She shot him an annoyed look and motioned for him to get down. He did so immediately and crawled on his belly to join her. He peeked over the hill to see what she was looking at. Below them were at least fifteen centaurs gathered around the three school artifacts. Two centaurs were restraining the hippogriff in chains and another had hold of Potter who was kicking and putting up a valiant albeit futile fight. Igor smirked. Something told him this would be a task that couldn't be accomplished with brute force. Now he was glad he went with his gut instinct. He looked at Fiona who gave the shrug he thought all French were famous for. It was a gesture that said "well, there's nothing we can do about this so let's just carry on shall we." He raised his eyebrows at her and then turned back to the gathering.

"And just who do you think you are? Trying to burst into our forest like you belong here?" The centaur who appeared to be the most powerful of his herd circled Potter in a menacing way. "What poor manners they're teaching you at that school."

"Let me go! I mean no harm, I just need the sorting hat." Potter's voice remained calm but firm. He was holding his own for the moment.

"And listen. He doesn't even say please or offer greetings or gifts." The leader smirked once again.

"I think we should teach him some manners." Another centaur piped up and the others grumbled in agreement.

"What should we do?" Fiona whispered to Igor.

"Nothing yet. Just wait it out, our moment will come." He switched his position to become more comfortable.

"But what if they hurt him?"

"Who the hippogriff?" Igor asked absentmindedly without taking his eyes off the kompass.

Fiona glared at him. "I meant James."

Igor snickered. He was far more concerned about the hippogriff than Potter. "I don't think they'll hurt Potter. Not badly anyway." Of course Fiona was worried but Igor thought he'd probably seen worse violence on the quidditch pitch.

The centaurs closed in on Potter and began speaking in hushed tones. Two thirds of them had their backs to the magical objects.

"Come on." Igor whispered to to Fiona and motioned for her to follow him. They moved around the hill positioning themselves closer. They settled in and watched. The Hippogriff continued to struggle and a few more centaurs moved in to control the beast. The others crowded around Potter who must have said something defiant for one of the centaurs spit in his face.

Igor looked at Fiona searching for her animal but couldn't see it. "Do you still have your magical creature with you?" Igor whispered, moving close enough to smell her perfume that Levin was always raving about. She was quite lovely but not as lovely as the witch that captured his heart. Still, he could see why Levin was smitten.

"Yes. Can't you see him?" She said softly, never taking her eyes off the centaurs.

"No. What is it?"

"Lucky you. It's a thestral. They're quite unfortunate looking but have the sweetest disposition if you treat them well."

"How well can you communicate with him?"

"He understands my commands, or at least appeared to when we were going through the forest."

"Good. When the centaurs aren't looking, we are going to have them swoop down and steal the objects. By the time they know what happened, we'll be out of here."

Fiona sighed nervously, bringing out Igor's chivalrous instincts. "Don't worry love." He patted her hand gently. "I won't let anything happen to you. Why, I've defeated plenty of centaurs before. They don't scare me."

"Really?" Her eyes were wide with admiration.

"Ahhh yes." He lied, then turned to his little owl. "Did you hear my plan little one?"

The little owl warbled in affirmation.

"Are you ready for action?"

The little owl bounced up and down again.

"Alright, when I say go, you go. Fiona, is your beast ready? They have to do this at the same time or we risk capture. We won't get another opportunity."

"We're ready. What do you want to do about Potter?"

"Nothing." Igor couldn't help but snarl a bit. "He certainly didn't stop to help me in the last task. We'll send someone back for him and the sorting hat."

"Are you sure he'll be all right?" The worry was obvious in her tone.

"Yes. Yes." He hissed impatiently. Potter was the least of his worries. "On three. One, two three." The little owl took off and the thestral apparently did too, for Igor felt the massive movement of air as the invisible beast took flight. He watched with nervous excitement as the little owl flew bravely towards the gathering of centaurs. Before he reached the sorting hat he saw the mirror levitate. The thestral obviously possessed speed. Igor's little owl followed and managed to wrap his tiny little talons around the Mājas Kompass. Igor's jaw tensed. The Kompass was as big as the owl, and the furious flapping of wings made it painfully obvious that it was too heavy for him. "Come on." Igor hissed under his breath, willing the owl to keep trying. The thestral was nearly back to Fiona with the mirror. "You can do it." His flexed his hands, thinking at any moment, he would have to go in. With one final heave the little bird flapped so hard he warbled loudly with the effort. The centaurs heard the noise and turned away from Potter just in time to see the owl fly away with the Kompass and Fiona taking the mirror from the Thestral.

"Intruders! Thieves! Seize them!" The leader of the centaurs commanded his underlings, and the air was filled with the sound of thundering hooves.

"Go! Go!" Igor shouted. Fiona mounted her invisible beast, Igor hopped on his broom, made one very daring backward pass to pick up the owl and kompass and he was off. They were well ahead of the land locked centaurs heading out of the forest. Igor laughed loudly, loving the thrill of success and the rush of flight! "We did it!" He smiled at Fiona as he caught up with her. She smiled broadly back at him but only for a second as she navigated the mass of trees. The forest was still quite dangerous even if they were away from the centaurs. So Igor stuck close by her out of chivalry and loyalty to Levin. However as soon as they were out of the forest, he tucked himself firmly around the Firebolt and surged forward. He reached Whipp in the winner's circle well ahead of Fiona to the cheers of the students and the jaunty strains of a band playing some sort of victory march.

Whipp held up Igor's hand and announced to the crowd,"The Winner from the Durmstrang Institute, Igor Karkaroff!"

Fiona came in shortly after, but by then Igor was already approaching his Headmaster with the Mājas Kompass in hand. His headmaster met him formally with a perfectly erect spine and one corner of his mouth discretely curving upward. Keeping in mind that everyone was watching him, Igor dramatically bowed low and handed him the kompass to Oblonsky, which he accepted.

"You have honored your school and your name today. Arise Mr. Karkaroff. Job well done." Igor stood up and looked at him. Oblonsky nodded in Natalia's direction and spoke in a lower tone. "Someone was very worried about you. Go to her." Igor nodded, relieved to have permission, as she was the only one on his mind at the moment.

He turned and met Natalia's eyes which wide with excitement and complimenting a lovely flush to her skin. He couldn't contain his wide grin and ran over to her nearly tackling her with his exuberant embrace. He lifted her up and out of the box and swung her around.

She hugged him hard and felt stronger still in her embrace. "I knew you could do it Igor! You were so smart to choose the little owl."

"I chose it because of you. It brought me luck." He set her down and kissed her with the cheers of his schoolmates in the background. It was a moment and feeling he would carry with him for years. He felt couldn't lose as long as he had her by his side. He knew they were destined for each other. And he knew he could never let her go.

_AN: Yea! Igor finally wins one for Durmstrang! I hope you like this chapter. Action scenes are not my forte so I hope I pulled it off. _

_Big ups to ShelleySnape who has assumed beta duties for me! She also sent me a fantastic drawing of Iggs and Nat at the ball! It's on my facebook site if you want to check it out! Also big thanks to WendyWaddles who is sending me the most stunning pictures of Pedja Bjelac (who plays Karkaroff)! Yummy:)_

_Are you missing Lucius yet? I kind of am. Don't worry, I haven't forgotten him.  
><em>


	36. Chapter 36 It's a Game

Chapter 36  
>It's a Game<p>

Fiona proudly presented her Headmistress with the mirror retrieved from the forbidden forest. She then grandly completed the formalities with a deep elaborate curtsey that Natalia thought would have rightfully be reserved for royalty. But then that is what others, mainly wizards, found mesmerizing in these witches. It made Natalia feel quite ordinary and uninteresting. She had no such exotic customs or resources from which to draw. Fiona held her pose for a moment, looking respectfully at the ground and when she finally arose, Maxine embraced her affectionately. "Tres magnifique Mademoiselle Lafayette."

"Merci Madame." Fiona smiled up at her, beaming with pride despite a second place finish. She was more than likely just glad to make it out unscathed. "James, ez still in ze forest." But before she could elaborate she heard her name from the crowd.

"Fionaaaaaa!" It was Leopold Levin's joyous cheer, the loudest over even her schoolmates which caused her to turn her pretty head. He waved excitedly, completely unconcerned with the attention he was calling to the two of them. She smoothed her windblown hair and smiled ardently back at him.

"Go!" Maxine nodded in Levin's direction. Fiona didn't hesitate for a moment, but ran straight across the converted pitch to greet him.

He gripped the rail on the edge of the viewing box, hoisted himself gracefully over the barrier and met her as she came running up to the box. He embraced her warmly if not with quite such abandon as Igor had embraced Natalia. "I'm so glad you're safe," he murmured into her ear. "That forest is so dangerous. I was so glad to see you coming out unharmed." He kissed her forehead and grinned eagerly at her.

"No worries about me Leo. Igor looked after me." She smiled over at Igor and didn't notice Natalia scowling at her.

"Did you now?" Levin asked, now eyeing his friend with curiosity.

"Of course I did." Igor said puffing his chest with pride. "We made a good team didn't we?" He chuckled warmly and gave a friendly wink.

Natalia's jaw clenched just looking at the buxom Fiona. She'd never considered herself to be the jealous type, but now she found herself wildly wondering what exactly happened in the forest when they were alone. She didn't want to share Igor with anyone, and found it difficult to trust people she barely knew, particularly attractive French witches.

"Thank you." Levin extended his hand seemingly not sharing Natalia's concern. Igor extended his hand also, but when Levin went to grasp it Igor pulled it away and ran it through his unruly hair, laughing mockingly at his friend..

Levin chuckled and punched Igor in the arm. Igor socked him back in the shoulder, and Natalia knew this puppy play would quickly digress. However they were interrupted by the gasp of the crowd as James Potter emerged from the forest with the sorting hat in hand. He was slumped over the now slow moving hippogriff, His robes were torn and there was blood on his forehead. The Hogwarts contingency applauded politely as crowds do when an injured player leaves the pitch of their own accord, but the enthusiasm was lacking. Potter lost. It was nothing to get excited about.

Natalia couldn't help but smirk to herself. Despite his recent aloofness, Severus would always be her friend, and she knew he would be happy that James finished dead last. She searched for him in the Slytherin box and found him almost immediately. She caught his eye and one corner of his mouth turned up. She winked back at him and smiled broadly, but then her blood turned cold as she saw the wizard standing beside him. Lucius Malfoy's grey eyes smoldered as he looked at her. He licked his lips purposefully. Quickly she turned back to Igor and gripped his arm. "Can we get out of here?"

"Not yet kitten. But soon." Igor draped his arm languidly over her shoulders unaware of Malfoy and Natalia snuggled closer to him, feeling safer already.

She cast a sidelong glance in Lucius' direction to find him leaving the Slytherin box with Severus and walking towards the Gryffindor box where Sasha was waving at them. Lily stood beside Sasha, and was watching James with great concern, wringing her hands.

"Champions! Gather round!" Whipp motioned them over to the podium.

"Be right back kitten." Igor punctuated his sentence with a firm peck on Natalia's lips. "I'll be right back and then I want you all to myself." He leaned closer and whispered in her ear, "Do you have a prize for me?"

"To the victor, go the spoils." She smiled back at him. He growled then left with Fiona to join Whipp and Potter already on the podium. She moved closer to Levin and kept her eyes fixed on Igor, terrified of seeing Lucius again and desperately wanting to leave.

"The winner, Igor Karkaroff of Durmstrang, second place, Fiona Lafayette of Beauxbatons and last, James Potter of Hogwarts. A round of applause for our champions please." The crowd cheered on cue with the rowdy sons of Durmstrang being the most exuberant. "This brings everyone's scores to even numbers. The final task will determine the winner."

James stalked off the podium first, red faced and obviously furious. He got to where Lily and his mates were standing but did not stop. The normally vocal Sirius seemed to know better than to make one of his typical smart remarks. He merely pursed his lips and jammed his fists into his pockets, looking down to avoid his friend's eyes. Peter Pettigrew took a step towards James but Remus put an arm out to stop him and gave him a warning look. Lucius, standing next to Severus and Sasha, leaned over and made a remark to his companions while rolling his eyes. Sasha shot him a dirty look and Severus snickered.

As James approached Lily she stepped over to meet him just as Natalia and Levin had done with their beloved returning champions. "Oh James, are you alright?" She reached lovingly for him but he jerked violently out of her grasp.

"Don't touch me!" Potter, with blood still dripping down his cheek, glared at her for a moment before stalking away with his three disciples trailing after him.

Lily, looking crestfallen, watched him stalk off towards the castle. It was a public and humiliating rejection, one that was quite puzzling for all who witnessed it. For they were generally a tender and loving couple in the eyes of anyone who bothered to notice. Lily blinked several times and bit her lip. She seemed to be trying very hard to keep it together, lest she appear an even more pathetic creature.

Natalia looked over at Severus who's face was contorted in a mix of rage and heartbreak as he looked first at Lily then at the fading figure of his nemesis. His reaction was apparently also not lost on Sasha who stood next to him, for she touched his arm. "Severus don't." Natalia's stomach churned as she knew from experience all pleading with him in matters regarding Lily would certainly fall upon deaf ears.

Predictably, Severus ignored her and went charging across the pitch after Potter.

"Lucius do something!" Sasha pleaded with her brother who only shrugged, much in the way the Beauxbattons girls did. Natalia smirked and wondered why Sasha would ever think her rat brother would help anyone but himself. It was a blatantly foolish prospect, but she assumed the plea was made in desperation. But Natalia didn't focus on Lucius long before she began to dread her friend's fate.

"Oh no." Natalia groaned while watching Severus get closer to his unsuspecting prey.

"What's wrong?" asked Levin. He followed her gaze toward the impending disaster. "Oh shit...don't do it Snape." Levin mused comedicaly.

Igor and Fiona came strolling up at that moment, laughing at something that occurred out of Natalia's earshot. Igor came behind her and put his arms around her waist, resting his chin on her shoulder. "What are you two looking at?"

"World war three is about to happen. Check it out." Levin nodded in Snape's direction.

"Oh shit...this isn't good." Igor watched with minimal concern without removing his chin from her shoulder. It was an interesting scene to watch, but not so interesting as to distract him for his love.

"Hey loser!" Shouted Snape. "Running off in shame? I'd say you should. That was a colossal failure! One big cocktail of idiocy and incompetence that was." Snape hissed at Potter, continuing to pile on insults and determined not to relent until he got a reaction.

"Back off Snivellus!" James whirled around eyes ablaze and wand at the ready.

"Igor do something." Natalia pleaded, gripping his hands tightly.

"I will if it gets to that point." He replied calmly. To him, these laddish tussles were just part of life and nothing to be terribly concerned about. "Let Severus be a man. He's a big boy. Obviously he wants a fight. Why should I stand in his way?"

"James, please, let's just go." Lily appeared again trying to pull James away.

"I told you to leave me alone!" James snapped at her again. "Can you just fucking listen to me for once and quit being such a pain in the arse?

"How DARE you speak to her like that!" Severus grabbed Potter by the shirt. "You have no right to address her like that you filthy piece of rubbish."

Potter, never one to back down from a fight with anyone, let alone someone like Severus, punched him in the stomach. Severus groaned but was undeterred and punched Potter squarely in the jaw. Snapes school robes rippled in the wind on his follow through and the effect was impressive. Potter hit the ground with a thud.

"Shall we help him out Iggy?" Levin asked this rather matter of factly.

"Not yet. He doesn't look like he needs help from anyone." Igor sighed.

Sirius and Remus geared up for a fight, approaching Snape with clenched fists.

"Severus you idiot!" Lily shouted while she tended to James on the ground, stroking his cheek. "Darling are you all right?" James scrambled to his feet again and began stalking off towards the castle. The fight was uncharacteristically out of him. Severus actually won this round.

Lily however was fuming. She marched over to Severus and slapped him in the face. A smattering of "Oooohs" could be heard rippling through the Gryffindor box. "You stay out of my life Severus Snape! I've told you before. Leave me alone!" Then she turned and chased after James, leaving Severus destroyed in her wake.

"Ouch..." Igor mumbled into Natalia's ear.

Severus stood rooted to the ground and for a moment it seemed that the earth stopped cold, but then moved on.

Natalia glanced over at Sasha who also hadn't taken her eyes off Severus.

"Severus..." Sasha whispered, but he did not turn around. She took a tentative step in his direction but Lucius held fast to her arm holding her back.

"Let him be Sasha." Natalia heard him say to her and thought that was probably one of the more humane things he'd ever done.

Levin shuffled his feet uncomfortably but remained transfixed as did everyone else. "Merlin's beard this is hard to watch." Fiona shushed him, but she too remained riveted to the scene before her.

Severus raised his head slowly and looked dreamily around at the crowd. Then his eyes narrowed, his shoulders pinched forward, and he stalked off.

The group was silent for a while before Levin broke the tension. "Well, that was a complete and utter cluster fuck. Shall we go celebrate with some butter beer?"

"Yes!" The other three responded immediately and in unison for they were all in need of a bracer after such an day. It wasn't even two o'clock yet but already they were tense and needed to blow off some steam. So the four of them ambled off towards Hogsmeade. Igor kept Natalia close to him, an arm around her, a hand held or an occasional stolen kiss. He was even more affectionate than usual, but rather than being uncomfortable, Natalia found security in it today. She didn't know why Malfoy was here, but she wanted to avoid him and be as close to Igor as possible.

Natalia felt a little strange being in The Three Broomsticks as a patron rather than as a server, but with Igor's arm draped possessively over her shoulder as they entered, she was ready for new things. He would keep her safe.

As Natalia spent more time with Lafayette that afternoon, she began to find her far more tolerable than she originally thought. The French accent, while grating to her English ears, was part of her persona, but if you got past that, she seemed to be quite caring and intelligent. She decided Levin had most certainly upgraded since his disastrous choice at the Yule Ball. For that matter, so had Lafayette.

"Iggy! As winner of the task I must insist that you buy the first round. I'll set us up a game of darts. Nat do you play?" Levin asked.

At last something she knew. After many nights playing wizard darts after closing with straggling regulars and waitstaff. "Of course," she said proudly. "I am the best at it."

"Ah, trash talk from my little kitten. I like that." Igor gave her a quick kiss before heading for the bar."

"I've never played zee game." Fiona chimed in.

Igor called back over his shoulder. "I say that about Levin everytime he plays."

Levin rolled his eyes. "Nat, no one talks more trash than your wizard over there." He quipped to Natalia. "You two should be quite a team."

Natalia seized a moment to build a friendship with Fiona. It was obvious they would be spending more time together. "Boys versus girls?"

"You don't want to play with Iggy?" Levin seemed shocked.

"Afraid we'll embarrass you?" She arched an eyebrow at him.

Levin smirked as Igor rejoined them. "What's that saying I've heard? Don't count your chickens before they hatch."

Fiona snatched the darts from his hand. "Ve ave a saying in my country too."

"Oh?" Levin moved closer to her, purposefully invading her space.

"Girls rule and zee boys drool." She smirked at him good naturedly.

Igor laughed loudly and slapped his knee. "You've finally met your match Levin. Excellent! I've been waiting for some witch to put you in your place for years. Your honor Lafayette." He handed her the bewitched wizard darts that resembled hummingbirds. Wizard darts was rather like the muggle version except you had to utilize a bit of magical control to get the birds to do what you wanted. Even still, sometimes they had a mind of their own and would fly out into the pub to dip their thirsty beaks in an unsuspecting patron's firewhiskey. If they indulged too much there was no telling where they would end up and the game became more entertaining by the hour.

The four of them played darts for several hours, taking a break for a late lunch before resuming play again. The later afternoon Hogwarts crowd began to roll in after they finished browsing in the local shops and pretty soon the place was full and bustling with everyone stopping to congratulate Igor and Fiona, some buying a round for their group. Natalia beamed at Igor as she watched how graciously he handled the attention, never boasting, always grateful, always smiling. She was proud to be with him. Through a group of underclassmen from Hufflepuff, he caught her eye and politely excused himself. He walked over and gently took her hand in his and kissed it. She caught a whiff of liquor on him, a very masculine smell before he leaned in and whispered, "Thank you."

"For what?" She smiled shyly up at him.

"For today. For coming here with me." He kissed her cheek gently. "For playing darts with me. For looking so beautiful." He then pulled her body firmly against his and bit his lower lip. "For the...pre-game."

Natalia giggled, feeling tipsy enough after a few drinks without his randy remarks to intoxicate her. "Shhhhh," she hissed giving him a playful shove. "Someone will hear you."

"No one's going to hear me." He rested his forehead against hers and his hair swung forth to hide them. "I can't stop thinking about it. I love that you swallowed."

It was her turn to laugh loudly at his scandalous remark. "Igor Karkaroff you are rotten. And anyway, why wouldn't I?"

They remained hidden beneath the safety of his hair which removed some conversational limits they might normally have observed. "Well aren't girls normally kind of prissy about things like that?"

Natalia giggled again. "How prissy can you be with a man's cock in your mouth?"

"Haaaaaa!" Igor now threw his head back and howled with laughter. "I am going to MARRY you Natalia Smith! Do you hear me? I. Am. Going. To. Marry. You!" He was pretty drunk but Natalia was still thrilled by the sentiment. He used his finger tips to raise her hand and spun her beneath them playfully.

"Is that a proposal?" She cocked her head to one side emboldened and flirtatious after the butter beers.

"No." He stopped and suddenly appeared quite serious. "Not a question. A statement."

It actually made her a little nervous and not knowing how to respond, she decided it was safer to make light. "That will be something to tell our children. 'How did father propose?' 'Ahhhhh wellll."

"We'll make up a better story." He chuckled and pulled her against him swaying to the music in the background and eyeing her as if there were no one else in the room.

"Congratulations Mr. Karkaroff." Lucius voice interrupted them. Now there was a buzz kill if there ever was one. She hadn't even seen him come in and here he was right upon them. Mentally she cursed herself for being so careless.

Natalia gasped indiscretely and instinctively pulled away from Igor. Her lower lip began to tremble with terror thinking that he might ruin things for her. Her behavior was not lost on Igor who looked first at Natalia, then at Lucius. His eyes narrowed and he straightened himself taller, his arm resumed it's proprietary position on her waist, marking his territory.

"Halloooo Luuuciusss, you needlessly rich asshole." Igor drawled out his words seathing with venom.

Natalia's eyes grew wide as saucers and she openly gaped at him. Levin seemed to appear out of nowhere and stood beside his friend as did a couple more of their mates. They had obviously been down this road before.

Lucius raised his eyebrows and clicked his tongue disapprovingly. "Charming company you're keeping these days Natalia."

"Lucius, don't." Sasha, who apparently entered with him, grabbed his arm. It was her turn to rein him in. "Hi, Igor." She smiled at him trying to save face. "Lucius, come along. Sev and Regs found us a table in the corner." She pulled him away much to Natalia's relief.

Her relief however was short lived as she noticed the damper Lucius' presence put on Igor's mood, her's too for that matter. He now seemed to be just going through the motions of being social rather than enjoying it. His smile was no longer reaching his eyes. When their last game was finished, Natalia touched his arm. "You look tired darling. It's been a long day, shall we go?"

He didn't answer, merely shrugged stood up. "Later Levin." He walked to the door without another word and without taking her hand or looking back. Natalia ran after him.

AN: Darn that Lucius, it was going so well! Iggy is jealous but that could be sort of fun if she plays it right! Thanks to all for the reviews and PM's this week. You guys are so funny:)


	37. Chapter 37 Head Games

Chapter Thirty-seven  
>Head Games<p>

Igor trudged up the quiet main street of Hogsmeade, fists jammed in his pockets and looking down at the cobblestone street. Natalia trailed after him, anxious and not knowing what to say to him, for he was obviously in one of his precarious states, teetering between one emotion or another. Her belly was full of bumpy knots. As if it wasn't bad enough to have Lucius rear his loathsome head, now she had to tread carefully around Igor's mood lest she draw his ire yet again. Much as she hated to, and even though the answer was obvious, she had to begin this conversation and ask him, "Is something wrong?"

He jerked his head towards her. His mournful eyes were dark and she knew immediately she had misjudged his expression. The ever present droop at the corner was more pronounced than usual and he wore a defeated frown, still she knew he was pondering something. She could almost see the wheels turning inside his head. "Yes," he said so sadly that the sound reverberated in her chest.

"You tend to wear your heart on your sleeve." She slipped her arm through his as they walked along, needing to be close to him.

He looked down at her draped on his arm. "That's where I found it." He smiled sadly.

They walked in silence another block until they were out of town and heading towards Hogwarts. Natalia tried to give him some time and let him start, but other than two very heavy sighs, he made no expression. The silence was maddening, and so she broached the subject again. "Igor please, you're scaring me. Please if there's something you want to discuss then say so. I can't read your mind."

He turned to her and held her hands gently in his. He gulped nervously, and licked his lips before asking, "Do you want to discuss what went on between you and that slippery sack of shit?"

Natalia felt the blood drain from her face then seem to pool at her feet which were now burning. "N-n-nothing." She said with her lower lip trembling.

"Don't lie to me." He growled through gritted teeth now bending to put himself at her at eye level. "I know you used to see him." He paused awkwardly, seeming to decide if he should proceed or not, but then blazed forward. "I walked up on you one night."

Her jaw nearly hit the floor and she regretted her obvious reaction immediately. What had he seen? What did he know? She made a feeble attempt to stall. "Well you know so much, you tell me."

"Stop it." He gave her hands a firm but gentle shake. "I know you had a...relationship. I know it was a secret. I know he was probably such a stupid arrogant bastard that he was ashamed of you. I know all that and I don't care." His dark eyes were sincere enough to break even the hardest of hearts, and they seemed to plead with her. "What I want to know, and I want to know now, is what he meant to you?"

She froze, for it was a question she didn't know the answer to herself. It was absurdly complicated and he would never understand particularly when the most horrible part of the story could never be revealed. She struggled for the right words. "He was...oh I don't know."

"You don't KNOW?" His voice lilted, bordering on sarcasm. Obviously she chose a poor response for his fragile emotions were now leaning to anger.

"No I just...well I..." Natalia sputtered and tripped over her words for she was thoroughly unprepared for this conversation despite weeks of dread that the subject would come up eventually.

"Did you love him?" He asked sincerely, his voice nearly trembling. He cleared his throat and continued to press her. "Please, be honest with me."

How could she be honest with him? He was expecting a simple "yes" or "no" answer and that just wasn't possible. The convoluted emotional layers were difficult to sort out in her own mind, much less explain them and do so without angering Igor or betraying her vow. She attempted to give him the most honest answer she could between her confused emotions and the fear of the Unbreakable Vow. "I loved the illusion that he presented. Please understand. I was fourteen Igor. What did I know? I knew nothing."

Igor again sighed heavily and one would wonder why such a young man would have such a heavy weight on his chest. He looked so terribly grave, far older than his years. When he spoke, he was somber. "Make your choice," he calmly demanded . "Make it now. You can go back there and I'll...you can go if you want Natalia."

His tender request tugged at her heart and she wanted nothing more than to reassure him. She reached up to gently caress his scruffy cheeks. "I don't want to go anywhere but where you're going. How could you think otherwise? I'm in love with you Igor."

Igor sighed and looked down at the ground. His shoulders seemed to relax. He reached up to wrap his hands around hers that were still lovingly holding his face. Turning them, he kissed the inside of one wrist and then the other. He moved them to the small of his own back and then it was his turn to hold her face in his hands. "Natalia, I don't think you understand the magnitude of the effect you have on me. My heart is in your hands, and I've never been in this position with anyone before. It's terrifying. You have to be mine. You have to be mine alone. I can't share you. I just can't. Please tell me I don't have to."

Natalia stood on her tiptoes and kissed his lips gently. "You don't have to. You never will." She kissed him again. "I'm so in love with you."

His lips descended on hers adoringly, slowly savoring her kiss and still cradling her face in his large hands. He moaned softly into her mouth, utterly desperate for all of her and at her mercy. Then he wrapped his arms tightly around her and nuzzled his cheek against her hair. "You must think I'm a fool after my outburst. I'm sorry kitten, ah sorry Natalia."

"I love it when you call me that." She gave him a squeeze while rubbing her hair against his cheek.

"Since when?" He asked, with his tone finally lightening. "I thought you hated it."

She pulled back a bit to look at him with a sweet smile. "It's growing on me."

"I'm glad. You are my kitten, so sweet and vulnerable. I want to protect you from people like that. It's a cold hard world but I'll take care of you."

It was beginning to get dark as they approached the Black Lake where the ship was docked.  
>"The others will be along shortly. Shall we get the bonfire started?"<p>

"Sure." Natalia said. She would have agreed to anything that would keep her in his company a little longer.

Igor summoned some wood together creating a rather large pile. Then he cast a ball of fire into the center and just before the sun vanished, he had a roaring fire. There was a large rock on the beach near the fire and he sat down in front of it and leaned back, then extended his arm to her. She took his hand and he pulled her gently down until she was sitting in front of him with his arms wrapped around her. They watched the last of the spring sun set as it cast red and purple tones across the sky. Though the temperature was beginning to drop, they warmed one another by remaining close. They sat in silence watching the flames for quite a while before he spoke again.

"I meant what I said earlier." His breath on her neck sent goose bumps down her arm. "I've never given my heart to someone like this before Natalia."

"Nor have I." She whispered, softly snuggling a little more against his shoulder.

"I hate to admit it to you but it really does frighten me." His voice was sounding more like his usual confident self and the return of vigor was soothing to Natalita after their emotional conversation earlier.

"I understand." She patted his hand reassuringly. "I'm far more risk averse than you, so you must know the anxiety you feel is doubled in me."

"So we are in uncharted waters." He observed, and Natalia had a feeling she was in for one of his stories, for he did love to tell a tale.

"It would seem." She responded with a smile that carried over in her voice.

"Do you know the legend of the Durmstrang kompass?"

"No," and she knew she was about to hear all about it.

"We sail. Men on ships are a transient lot. We leave port, leave loved ones behind."

"Oh, don't talk of that." The very thought of him sailing away from her made her stomach tighten.

""But we always return. The thing with seafaring people, we make connections all over the world, sometimes, you're gone so long you feel you no longer have a home or that the ship is your home." He gestured grandly toward the lake.

Natalia took his hand and wrapped it back around her. "I don't like talk of your absence. What does this have to do with us?"

"The kompass leads you home. It knows where you're heart is even when you don't."

"We say, home is where the heart is."

"Right. So when you're in uncharted waters, as we are now, it brings clarity. You're like that for me. When I lose focus, start to drift as I am prone to do, one moment you and I'm righted again. It's always been that way with us. Remember some of my terrible quidditch performances? When you showed up, I was redirected to the right path. You're like my kompass."

Natalia giggled. "Not traditionally romantic but I think you're quite eloquent."

"It's a force I can't describe in a practical manner. So forgive me if I run on.

"I love listening to you talk." She smiled and bit her lip, then turned in his arms to face him. "But I like shutting you up even better." She brushed her lips against his lightly, just to tease him. He responded by closing his eyes and lightly caressing her lips with his, back and forth. He nipped playfully at her bottom lip eliciting a giggle. He smiled, still with his eyes closed then traced her lips with his tongue. "Mmmm," she sighed and the sound travelled deep inside of him causing him to feel the beginnings of arousal again.

'What about the post game?" He growled, curling his leg around her and pulling her closer with it.

Natalia feigned shock. "You're insatiable Mr. Karkaroff. Do you honestly expect me to be seduced right here at the bonfire? A proper young witch like me?"

"Less conversation." He whispered while trailing warm kisses along her jawline. "More kissing your boyfriend please."

When he got to the spot where her neck met her shoulder she laughed loudly. "Hey that tickles."

"Does it?" He went back for more, this time growling playfully like a bear and exaggerating a nuzzle into her hair.

"Stop!" She laughed, shoving him playfully. "You're rotten Karkaroff!" He growled again pushing her back on the ground much to her delight. She squealed with laughter which only emboldened him and he began to tickle her. "Ahh! No fair!" she squirmed beneath him. He continued for a moment before pulling back to watch her laugh. She noticed that he stopped. "What is it?"

"Nothing. You're beautiful Natalia."

She smiled and looked up at his adoring expression with the brightest dark eyes imaginable. They gazed at each other in the light of the fire and the moon, young and in love.

"Hey you two!" Levin and Fiona strolled up and Igor reluctantly pulled himself off her and assumed a more appropriate position. However he kept his arm around her and remained close.

As the rest of the Durmstrang boys joined the bonfire, Igor introduced her to everyone and included her in all conversations, deferring to her for her opinion on any topic that came up. It was new territory for Natalia, who had never had someone to draw her in so attentively. Igor actually seemed to want to show her off. He was attentive and extolled her virtues until she blushed and chided him. He playfully stole kisses at moments when it was appropriate, but not like the morning in the great hall so as not to make her self conscious. He was thoughtful and considerate, and Natalia was falling more in love with him by the moment.

His friends were lively and intelligent, not at all snobbish and she felt happy to be a part of the group. Though some of the crowd continued to drink, Igor passed on all offers and whispered into her ear, "You're intoxicating enough for me." His lips brushed against hers briefly but did not linger so long as to draw attention to them. She felt relaxed and a welcome part of his circle of friends. She mused about how different things were with Igor as opposed to Lucius.

Lucius. It was if he heard her thinking his name for almost immediately he came staggering over the hill with his sister Sasha, Severus, Regulus and Barty Crouch Jr. They were an odd lot, all appearing to be inebriated except for Regulus and perhaps Sasha, thought she didn't appear to be herself. Barty was draped all over her despite her attempts to wriggle free, but when she wasn't rolling her eyes at Barty, they were fixed on Severus with heartbreak right at the surface. Severus looked to be in a brood as usual but his expression was unfocused. Lucius staggered, giggling about something with Barty as Sasha fumed. When Lucius found her in the crowd, he made a ridiculous face which was most likely intended to be sexy but looked more like a constipated duck in Natalia's opinion.

"Oh no." Natalia gasped.

"What's wrong?" Igor turned to her with concern.

"Lucius again." She nodded in his direction. "Can we just go before he causes more trouble?"

Igor's spine stiffened. "I'm NOT running from him." He said icily. Then more softly, "Nor should you."

"I don't want to deal with anymore of his shenanigans."

"Well then we have to face him."

"Oh Igor, I don't care about him but he's already caused one riff between us today."

He smiled, wide eyed, " But look at the good that came of it. I feel even closer to you." He kissed her lightly again. "Don't worry about him Kitten. You're with me now. We stand together and there is nothing that arse can do about it. Let him try."

"Igor, please," she begged.

"I told you, I am NOT running from him. WE are not running from him. Darling, I think you will find me always willing to compromise, but in this matter I will not give in. Don't argue with me sweetness. Everything will be fine." He smoothed her hair gently and the gesture relaxed her. Despite what people said about him when he was around her he was not controlling, quite the opposite. She rather liked this side of him. "Trust me?"

"Yes. Implicitly."

And everything was fine, for about an hour. The drinking and revelry continued. Igor appeared to forget about Lucius although Natalia knew inwardly he always had one eye on the enemy. He was no fool. Natalia tried very hard not to look at Lucius but the few times she weakened and did, she found him leering drunkenly at ther. Not good. Natalia considered trying to lure Igor away with the promise of seduction but she was afraid Lucius would follow. That would be just like him to be their perverted voyeur.

As the evening wore on, Lucius and Barty got louder, trading stories back and forth. While Severus continued to drink with them, he became quieter. Barty became more bold with Sasha and began to touch inappropriately. She continued to slide out from under his touch under the disapproving eyes of Regulus. Severus too watched them with hazy interest before abruptly leaving and heading in the direction of Hogwarts alone. Sasha watched him go and sighed. Barty gave her a squeeze and she smiled patronizingly at him. She said something to him and he nodded. Then Sasha rose and walked over to where Natalia and Igor were standing. Igor was otherwise engaged in conversation, but Natalia slipped out of the circle and greeted her friend.

"Heyyyyyy Nat," Sasha slurred a little and hugged Natalia sloppily. "You look loooovleeeey." She gushed, smiling in a rather goofy manner with heavily lidded eyes.

"Merlin's beard Sasha, you're completely pissed." Natalia tried to hold her friend up but was thrown off balance and staggered with her.

"I'm celebrating." Sasha remarked flatly, her mood turning quickly. It was almost as if she had forgotten she was in a foul temper and then was reminded.

"Celebrating what?" Natalia inquired with a scowl. "You've been looking like you're going to a funeral all night."

Sasha's mood changed yet again and she now appeared melancholy. "I guess it is sort of like a funeral," she mused. "It feels like something is dying. I'm engaged to Barty." This announcement came with none of the usual emotion one has when announcing their own engagement. She might as well have remarked about the weather.

Natalia could do nothing but gape at her for several moments. "Barty?" She wrinkled her nose in ill disguised disgust. " But I thought...I didn't even know you were even seeing him."

"I'm not." She spat, now petulant. "Father arranged it all." She shrugged her shoulders and sighed. "By the end of summer I'll be Mrs. Barty Crouch."

Natalia couldn't help but ask, "Does Severus know?"

"Mmmph," Sasha shrugged again now drifting back into sadness. "Yes."

"What did he say?" Natalia had a pretty good hunch that Severus, though frequently leering at Sasha, made no move to oppose her match with another. However, there was the hope.

"Nothing." She whispered. "Not a word. He's been quite preoccupied today."

"I guess so. That was quite a scene he made with Lily." As soon as she mentioned the name, she wished she could take it back. Sasha was sure get wound up tight at the mere mention of the incident.

"Stupid cunt."

"Sasha!" She was as unruly as her brother in her current state. Natalia quickly looked around to see if anyone else heard her colossal breach of propriety.

"Ugh, what?" She sassed like a spoiled child complete with a surly sneer on her lips. "Don't YOU start."

"I'm not starting with you but remember yourself." Natalia chastised her in a firm whisper.

Sasha rolled her eyes and put her hand on her hip. "Oh, pardon me for using language unbecoming of a Malfoy."

"What's unbecoming of a Malfoy?" Lucius seemed to appear out of nowhere. "Sasha, how could you even use those two words in a sentence together?" He snickered before his eyes landed on Natalia. "Hello love." Brazenly, his eyes swept up and down her body carrying with them the familiar look that she knew all too well.

"Lucius." She nodded while the color drained from her face. Here she was toe to toe with him and Igor was not close enough to help. She hastened to return to his side before things with Lucius digressed as they normally did.

He stepped closer to her and began to turn on what passed for charm. "You're looking particularly lovely this evening. I might say radiant if I didn't know better." One eyebrow arched upward almost daring her to call him out in some fashion.

But Natalia would not be tempted, preferring to return to Igor and avoid the confrontation entirely. "Excuse me." She turned to go. But she should have known better than to think he would let her go quietly.

"Walk away slowly Natalia." He drawled loudly enough for anyone within twenty feet to hear. "I'm admiring the view, and I like what I see."

With the reflexes of a pouncing jaguar, Igor jumped between them, violently seized Malfoy by the lapels of his coat and glared into his eyes for a second before a guttural noise erupted from his chest. He lurched his upper body back, then thrust savagely forward, cracking his skull against Malfoy's and knocking him unconscious. He released Lucius who tumbled into a heap on the earth.

"Lucius! Oh, Merlin's Beard Igor!" Sasha dropped to the ground and began trying to revive her brother who lay there stupefied as if he'd been cursed, with a large gash that was beginning to seep blood down into his eye.

Natalia stood frozen to the ground, watching the surreal scene in astonishment. After Sasha gently slapped his face and called his name several times, Lucius appeared to be coming out of it. Natalia was anxious to get out of there with Igor before Lucius came to his senses and the fight continued. She looked up at Igor who was watching her with a worried expression, his mouth forming a tight line and his forehead crinkled. She didn't want him to worry. Her heart soared in the knowledge that he would stand up for her. She smiled dreamily at him.

"See?" He said in a clipped business like tone. "I told you there was nothing to worry about." A crowd was beginning to gather around the casualty. It wouldn't be long before some of the Slytherins exacted some kind of vengeance.

"Can we go now please?" She pleaded softly

He nodded curtly but did not return her emotion. "I'll walk you to the castle."

He grabbed her hand and nearly pulled her arm out of the socket when he hauled her out of the party without so much as a good-bye to anyone, even Levin. They walked quickly and in silence back to Hogwarts, neither knowing how to begin and both fearing the other's reaction. As they neared the castle, Natalia led him away from the main entrance. "Let's go through the conservatory. It's well after curfew." It was true, but really she just wanted to be alone with him in the safety of the castle. The day had been turbulent and she just wanted peace.

"Mmmmhmmm." Igor mumbled.

They entered the greenhouse, dark but with bits of moonlight streaming through the leaves of the plants in front of the windows. She sighed with relief and turned to face him but couldn't find the right words to begin. Suppose he thought she had flirted with Lucius. Perhaps he would be angry that he left her side. Her mind turned over these thoughts and words failed her until she saw him rub his head. Of course after the blow he'd dealt Lucius it must be throbbing. His injury gave her something on which to focus her conversation.

"Does it hurt?" She reached up and placed her hand on his head softly so as not to aggravate a tender spot.

"I'm fine Natalia." He removed her hand and examined it carefully, running his fingers over the soft back of it.

"I suppose you're angry with me for my outburst." He continued, unable to meet her eyes. "You probably think I'm barbaric."

His words tugged at her heart as it occurred to her that no matter how confident he appeared on the outside, he shrank from all his insecurities just as she shrunk from her own. His apprehension made her want to comfort him again. How could he be unsure of her after all his reassurances? She wanted nothing but to be in his arms. She waited for him to embrace her but he did not, rather he remained looking down at her hand, his hair shading his eyes so that she could only see the well defined lines of his nose and chin. His full lips mesmerized her particularly when he licked them nervously, then exhaled raggedly. She felt desire begin to stir inside her jeans and could not resist initiating what she so desperately wanted. While she'd enjoyed pleasing him earlier that morning, it had left her torturously unsatisfied and she had thought of it frequently throughout the day.

"I think you're incredibly sexy." She drew nearer, reached up, and curled her hands around the back of his neck, then pulled him closer for a slow leisurely kiss. He responded in kind mirroring her unhurried caress, but then something seemed to come over him for this passion intensified. His kiss became harder, more urgent and he pushed her back against a table. He lifted her up and set her down on it then pulled her backside against his groin. It was what she wanted. She needed him to need her, to be mad with desire and to go mad if he couldn't have her. His roughness thrilled her. Gladly would she give herself again and again to such a man. She wrapped her legs around his body, arched her back to be closer still to him, and moaned her desire into his mouth.

"I need you Natalia. Please I need you now."

"Now yes. Yes Igor." She whispered before finding his lips again and beginning to undo his belt. She managed to undo it quickly and he began working on her jeans. Undoing the button was no problem but it took some writhing around to get her out of them. That mission was accomplished quickly and then he pressed himself against her again, assaulting her lips and caressing her backside thoroughly, not missing a spot and going over and over it.

Their desire increased to a fever pitch and finally he lined himself up and plunged his thick erection into her slick sugar walls. Both cried out, but rather than pause to gather himself, Igor plunged immediately in again, and again and again. His hands firmly gripped her arse pulling her to meet his insistent thrusts. Each time their flesh came together Natalia breathed hard and whimpered, utterly at his mercy and eager to submit to his wishes. She too, grabbed him by the bum and pulled him into her harder and harder each time. She felt she couldn't get him to slam into her hard enough, unable to enjoy the pleasure of the last thrust before she was anticipating the next. Suddenly their rhythm seemed to find sublime perfection, hitting the ultimate point of friction each time, over and over, so perfect, so incredible until the ultimate rapture came over them both. Igor shuddered as he clung mercilessly to her, squeezing her hard and unable to let go. Natalia's legs clenched around him, riding out each wave of pleasure as it swept over them and then ebbed slowly away like the tides.

They remained still for several moments, not wanting to break the spell and drift back to reality. It was Igor who moved first, moving his face so their cheeks grazed one another. "I meant what I said today. You will be mine forever."

AN: Apologies to canon loyalists as I know you are questioning Barty's age. I made him a little older for this little sub plot. If you want to know what happens to Severus after he leaves the party, check later this week. I should have a juicy little one shot posted in a few days. Enjoy the weekend and root for DH2 at the MTV movie awards...or just drool over Russell Brand...either way...:)


	38. Chapter 38 I Believe

Chapter Thirty Eight

Natalia was picking at her breakfast while sitting across from Severus a week after the second task. The last seven days with Igor had been as blissful as the warm breezes that were now felt on the grounds in the peak of the afternoon sun. Though relations between them had been tense at the beginning of their relationship as they both worked through where they stood with the other, that was now behind them. Finally they could relax and enjoy one anothers company, and for Natalia in particular, that was a welcome change. For so long she felt like she was always on the brink of certain disaster, between her secret relationship with Lucius, and her precarious financial situation, she was always under stress. It had become such a normal part of life, that she hadn't realized how horribly it affected her health and mood. The tight knot that normally housed itself in her back between her two shoulder blades seemed to have vanished and she felt physically lighter. It was only now that she was relieved of this burden that she knew how greatly she had been hindered by it.

Her meal was interrupted by the morning post, delivered by a rather regal looking horned owl making a deposit on her table. Immediately she recognized the expensive engraved stationary and the Malfoy Crest. She smirked and flicked it with her fingers in the general direction of Severus, like one might flick dirt off their lapel. "For you." She smirked, for the very thought of Lucius put her in a foul mood. There had been no fall out since Igor knocked him out at the bonfire. Even those that Lucius was friends with were all in agreement that he had it coming. So Igor was safe from retaliation for now.

Severus picked up the letter and examined the side with the address. He raised an eyebrow and snapped the paper towards her. "Actually, it's for you."

"Me?" her heart began to race as anxiety gripped her for the first time in many days.

"You." Severus deadpanned which made her want to kick him under the table, hard.

"Oh lovely." Natalia sneered. "This ought to be good." She thought as she opened the letter and looked around to see if anyone was watching. Fortunately everyone was too engrossed in their own post, The Daily Prophet, or the meal before them to concern themselves with her mini drama. She opened it quickly and began to read his technically perfect but slightly effeminate script.

N,  
>I so wanted to speak with you when we last saw one another. However your overzealous security detail prevented such a meeting. I sincerely hope you do not mistake his territorial aggression for anything more than testosterone infused jealousy. He may be from another land however the same social mores apply there. His family has certain expectations for him which will not include you, and he will not disappoint them. Don't be a fool. This is the way of the world. You can't escape it. Before you become angry, please know that this is written with honesty and in the spirit of friendship.<br>Your servant,  
>L.<br>P.S. My offer still stands.

Natalia sighed in annoyance at his absurd postscript as she refolded the letter and tucked it into the folds of her Charms book. How was it that one word from that snake could ruin her good mood? Of course she knew how, she suspected that he was right. Igor never discussed his family with her and she had never been introduced. While the young men from his school were accepting, perhaps his family was not.

"What's he want?" The sound of Severus' voice made her jump. She was not in a temper for a debate and so tried to gloss over the subject.

"Oh Severus, what do all men want?" She sighed and picked up her tea for a sip while looking down the table to make herself appear unconcerned.

"He wants you to dress up as Wonder Woman, tie him up with the golden lariat and force him to tell the truth?"

On any other day she would have found him amusing but not today. She narrowed her eyes and arched one eyebrow upward. "Been saving that one up have you?"

"Just for you." He smirked with one corner of his mouth curling into a half smile. For a brief moment, Natalia realized what Sasha found beautiful in him, and her mood softened. He was her dearest friend and meant no harm.

"It's a warning." She replied, setting her teacup down.

"A warning?"

"Yes. He's warning me that my relationship with Igor can't last because of what amounts to a class system."

Severus did not respond with words, but rather with a patronizing look that said, "I told you so."

"Don't look at me like that. I suppose you still share his sentiments." She remarked with a clipped tone.

"I have said this all along. I'm not saying it to hurt you but to prepare you. I personally live it. Don't think you'll be any different."

"Severus, I don't want to hear it." She gathered her things abruptly and began to walk to her Charms class. She fumed as she walked out of the Great Hall. Why couldn't he just be supportive as opposed to practicing extreme honesty?

The Durmstrang students were taking Divination in a nearby classroom at the same time she was in Charms, and when she walked to the corridor that lead to the Charms class, she always saw him. She was looking forward to it today. She needed his strong arms around her and his deep accented voice telling her it would all be okay.

He was waiting for her, leaning casually up against the wall with one foot propped against it. He smiled broadly and walked to meet her. "Good morning Kitten." He was beautiful and if she lived to be one hundred she would never tire of looking into those dark brown eyes. He hadn't had a haircut since Christmas and his hair now reached well past his collar, hanging in glossy waves that gave him an rakish look. His beard was neatly trimmed close to his face but full and dark, making him look older and slightly dangerous. "Merlin's Beard, he is a sexy beast," she thought as she neared him. She was so distracted that she accidentally bumped into another student and dropped her books.

Igor naturally rushed to help her pick them up along with the parchments that spilled out including, much to her horror, the letter from Lucius. Natalia froze when she saw him pick up the letter. He started to hand it to her but then paused to examine it. He eyed the crest suspiciously, then those dark eyes met hers. "Is this from who I think it's from?" He stood up, but never moved his eyes away from hers.

She nodded, slowly rising herself. Igor took a deep breath and let it go slowly. Then he handed it graciously back to her. She didn't want to touch it, but was unsure how to respond. In his current state it was probably best to take her cues from him.

"When did you get this?"his tone was business like but he was obviously seething. He was consistently miserable at hiding his emotions.

"It came just this morning. I don't correspond with him. Please don't think that I do."

"And what does he want? No, wait, I think I can guess." He quipped maliciously.

"Just read it."

He tried again to get her to take it back. "I don't want to read your love letters from my rivals."

"It's not a love letter. Please, I'd rather you just read it yourself than have to tell you what it says."

"So you want me to know the contents." He seemed to appreciate the concession.

"I'd rather you know for certain than speculate."

"Very well." He opened the letter and read it quickly, but it seemed like an eternity to Natalia.

"Offer? To what is he referring?"

Natalia cringed. She'd forgotten the postscript. "Shit." She mumbled under her breath.

"Nataaaaaliaaa…" He drawled her name like he was admonishing a small child. Perhaps as a modern witch she should be offended at such a tone, but she was too nervous to be offended.

"He offered me a job." It wasn't a lie.

"Doing what?"

There was so little she could actually share with him, but she could share this shameful truth. She would have to. She blushed and looked down. "Domestic help." her words hung in the air for several moments while students continued bustling by them.

"I'll assume by the crimson in your cheeks that this does not mean pastry chef or florist but something unseemly."

She merely nodded.

He growled and raked his fingers through his hair. He turned and took three steps away from her, only to turn back and continue pacing. "How DARE he dishonor you by such a churlish prospect. I will curse his lily white arse into oblivion!"

"Igor please don't. Please just let it go.

"Let it go? An affront to your honor like this? I can not." He shook his head furiously.  
>"Absolutely out of the question."<p>

Her honor, there was a dubious concept. Little did he know she had minimal honor to defend. Having yet another confrontation between the two of them would serve no purpose.

"Please no. I don't want to grace this with a response. It doesn't deserve one."

Igor ignored her and continued to rant. "I'm not the kind of person he's making me out to be, nor is my family. They are good caring people. Natalia, please don't listen to him. Those are his issues not mine. He's just jealous that you have moved on and he's still stuck with that anorexic witch with a broomstick up her arse."

She sighed heavily. "I know."

"Look at me." He lifted her chin gently. "He can't come between us Natalia. You know I would never let that happen. As far as this letter, well you have nothing to be ashamed of. You were honest with me and I appreciate that. You told me it's over and I have no reason to doubt you. He knows nothing of my family, they will adore you just as I do."

"Oh, I hope so." It was one of her greatest hopes and greatest worry.

"I know so." He kissed her quickly. "Now we both have to get to class but I don't want you to think about this letter anymore. It means nothing to us."

"Okay."

"Promise? I know how you fret." She nodded. "Good. So can I see you tonight?"

"I'm supposed to help Poppy organize some records."

"I'll come in and help you. We'll get done early. Then I'm going to pull you into a dark corner and violate you." He snaked his arms around her waist and smiled broadly.

She gave him a playful push. "You are rotten."

"You love it don't you?" His laugh was warm and easy. It calmed her.

"Well, yes." She stood on her tiptoes and kissed his nose, then turned to go to her class, feeling so much better about it all. He was so good for her.

He laughed loudly as he walked down the hall. He met up with Levin what observed the exchange.

"What was that about?"

"Oh, nothing serious. She's worried my family won't like her. I told her they would love her." Igor raised his chin haughtily.

"Sure about that?" Levin asked with the brass that only came from long friendships.

"Why wouldn't they?" Igor was irritated.

Levin knew Igor well enough to know when to push him and when to let it drop. This was a time to let it drop. "No reason. I'm sure you're right."

They settled into their seats and immediately tuned out Trelawney's ominous warbling. Igor's mind wandered to where, when and how he would be making love to Natalia again. They frequently improvised on locations which made things all the more exciting knowing they could get caught. However he longed to have her in a large and luxurious bedroom with all the time in the world. He was musing in this idea when the professor with the wild and wiry hair interrupted. "Give me the cup," she demanded.

"Let me guess. I am in grave danger." He smirked. She ignored him and began to read his tea leaves.

"No Mr. Karkaroff, you have great things in your future. You will know great love." His mates snickered. "but you will also know great tragedy. Take care my boy. Things are not as they appear."

She moved on to another student but Igor felt a chill run down his spine. Could she mean Natalia?

_AN: I hope you are all still out there after the great purge:) I am thankful that my stories are still posted but am shopping for another site so I can write what I want without fear of having them wiped out without warning. I have no desire to violate the rules of the site. If any of you are currently on a site that you like that would be suitable for my precious Igor, please let me know and I'll check it out._

_I realize I may be a little off on Trelawney's age. It just worked. Hope it doesn't bother you:)  
><em>


	39. Chapter 39 The Final Countdown

Chapter Thirty Nine

The Final Countdown

Igor and Natalia studied in the library late into the evening the day before the final task. It was Friday night and most everyone they knew was doing something of a social nature, but Igor was focused and determined to win. He would not allow anything to divert his attention from what he had to do, except perhaps for the lovely witch in front of him. He caught a whiff of her lavender scent and raised his eyes from his book. Her hair had grown since the night of the ball and she now had her raven tresses pulled back from her face with some kind of scarf. A few tendrils of her bangs escaped and grazed her forehead. He watched her for several minutes without her knowing, as she remained engrossed in her 7th year Ancient Ruins book. Her bangs must have bothered her for she stuck out her lower lip and absent-mindedly blew them up and off her face, which elicited a low chuckle from Igor. She looked up at him and flashed a smile that he was quite sure was the most dazzling smile he had ever seen.

"We'd better start packing up Igor." Natalia sighed, closing her book. "You need to get plenty of rest for tomorrow. We want you at your best." She patted his hand reassuringly.

He sighed heavily and slouched back in his chair. "Do you honestly think I can sleep tonight?"

"Oh," she looked at him sympathetically, "You'll be fine. Igor honestly what's the worst that can happen?"

"I'll lose," he grumbled like a petchulent child while crossing his arms, "be humiliated. I could be killed, nothing to worry about." He shrugged and rolled his eyes, completely irritated that she was minimizing his plight.

"You're not going to do any of that." Her voice was melodious, kind and soothing to him. "You're far too smart.

He smiled sheepishly at her, now embarrassed by his own outburst. He leaned forward over the table again and took both her hands in his. "I want you with me, right by my side tomorrow. You're the only thing that calms my nerves."

She arched an eyebrow and smiled suggestively. "Yes, remember how I calmed your nerves last time?"

His cock twitched and he shifted in his seat. "As if I could forget? I was ah…" he looked over his shoulder to see where the librarian who was organizing a card catalog and oblivious of the titillating conversation happening a few meters away. "I was kind of hoping you could calm them now." He smiled his never fail womanizing smile at her.

"What?" Her eyes grew wide with shock but she was still smiling. "Are you crazy? It's almost lights out and the teachers will be on hall duty. We're sure to get caught."

"Ugh," he groaned and had to adjust himself below the desk. "Natalia, I'm so backed up. Come on. I know just where we can go. You know the teachers are never around when the students get freaky. It's almost laughable."

"Well you say that now, but every so often a parent catches wind or some little rat gets jealous and finks to Dumbledore. Then they get pretty serious for a few months. It usually blows over though."

"Pretty inconsistent." He smirked, but his smirk was less about the rules and more because he knew she was shutting him out physically tonight.

"Yes, but we know the rules so it's the risk we take. Generally I'd say it's well worth the risk but not tonight. You need to conserve your energy."

He sighed. "Well, we'll be leaving soon and it won't matter. We can make our own rules."

"Well University has different standards but they still have rules. Gosh, I've been so busy I've barely thought about it. The coursework will be even harder. I hope we can manage to see each other a couple weekends each term."

"Manage a couple weekends?" He narrowed his eyes at her in confusion.

"Oh ah, yes." She hesitated while trying to decipher his meaning. "Well, I guess I'm being presumptuous. I just assumed…well we've been spending so much time together. Didn't you want to continue this?" Her face fell as she said the words.

"Continue?" He blinked several times. "Yes, of course, but not from a distance."

"I've been accepted to The Hackney Institute."

"The Wacky Institution?" Igor curled his lip in disgust uttering the distasteful nickname for the working class excuse for university. The very thought of such a fine mind as hers being wasted in such a place was a travesty. "That's beneath you Natalia. You can do better than that and you know it."

Her cheeks reddened. She felt Hackney was decent from an academic standpoint but it was located in a bad section of London with none of the status attached to other universities. "Well I know it's not prestigious, but I won't have to take out any loans and the housing is cheap."

"Loans? What?" Igor shook his head violently. "No! Natalia, I'll take care of all that."

"No." Natalia insisted. She was not willing to go down this road again. "I've earned the money. I want to do it on my own."

"Away from me?"

"It's not ideal but…"

"NO!" He smacked his hand down on the table, causing her to start.

"Excuse me?"

"No! You're not doing it. I'll not have you living in bloody Hackney alone. Have you gone mad? Do you think I would ever allow that?" Her expression conveyed her astonishment but in truth he was astonished with himself. Normally he was not possessive but it was different with her.

"Allow that? I beg your pardon. I'm not your property."

"Natalia, I'm going to attend The Kashchej Academy. It's the most prestigious school in eastern Europe."

"Well bully for you." She nearly snarled at the highlighted disparity of their situations. "Even if I could afford that, I'd never be admitted. I can't even speak Russian." She began to slam all their books shut and stack them on the table, preparing to leave.

Gently, he pulled her hand off the book and pulled her around to his side of the table. "I can teach you." He bit his lower lip on one side while smiling with the other side.

"In four months?" Natalia huffed. "Well enough to handle university coursework? What a preposterous notion! I'm good but I'm not that good."

He pulled her onto his lap and put his arms around her waist, keeping his cool in hopes of soothing her. "You can stay with my family for the first year and immerse yourself in the language. That's the best way to learn."

"Oh, I'm sure they'll love you bringing home strays." She rolled her eyes while deep in her heart, she hoped he was serious.

"I'd be bringing home my fiancé." He held her a little tighter knowing she would react strongly and fearing that she might run away.

"What?" Her eyes quickly returned to his, again wide with shock. Would he ever cease to shock her?

"Does this shock you?" He cocked his head to one side thoughtfully. "I've already told you I wanted to marry you." His voice was seductive and deeply sincere.

"Yeah, when you were half drunk and rambling in the pub." She played with a piece of his hair that was grazing his shoulder. He closed his eyes briefly and snuggled briefly against her tender touch.

"I'm sober as a judge now Kitten."

Her eyes searched his for a moment. "Are you proposing?"

"Because you really didn't ask." She teased, too nervous to take him serious. "You ordered."

Igor's face softened and suddenly he went from mildly manipulative to the most sincere and open of hearts. He took her hand and guided her off his lap. Then he got up from the table and kneeled before her. He gulped nervously. "Natalia Smith, I don't ever wish to be parted from you again. I want you to share my life, and become part of my family. Will you do me the honor of becoming my wife?"

It was what she wanted. It was all she wanted. But the disastrous end to her affair with Lucius still haunted her. She loved this man desperately, and though her outward expression betrayed nothing, internally she was in a panic. She tried to stall him. "We're only seventeen Igor."

"I'm an old soul." He smiled weakly

"You've only known me for a few months."

"When you know, you just know. More time won't change my feelings, only deepen them."

He was not hearing her protests. It was so typical of him to push through obstacles once he decided he wanted something. So she was forced to take a more obnoxious approach. "Where's the ring?"

His mouth fell open until he seemed to remember to close it. "The ring." His shoulders slouched in defeat as he was empty handed and without a retort.

"Yes," she whispered. "It's customary to offer a ring as a sign of your intentions and a symbol of your promise."

His mouth hung open again as he writhed in his own stupidity and over confidence.

"You don't have one do you?"

"Ahhhhh, no." He mumbled. "But I'll get one."

"See that you do." She nodded formally. "Then you can ask me properly."

He scrambled to his feet, looking over to see if the librarian noticed his folly. She didn't. "If I do that, will you say yes?" He was nothing if not a persistent and ardent lover.

She smiled coyly at him, and collected her books. "I'll think about it." She leaned down and kissed his forehead. "I love you. Now get to bed."

The following day Igor paced back and forth as he always did before a task or important quidditch match. Where was Natalia? She promised she would be right there to keep him centered and ease his worried mind. No doubt she was studying and lost track of time, or working. She was always putting that first. He fumed, his anxiety leading him down the path of least resistance. Even Levin had left him alone not even meeting him for breakfast for the usual pre task pep talk. And here was his witch Fiona, wringing her hands and looking just as agitated as Igor. What a selfish git!

"Champions," Whipp appeared and beckoned them over. "Gather round and follow me. He led them onto a large stage that had been erected on the pitch. There their headmasters joined the three champions while the crowds of students cheered them on.

Whipp placed his wand to his throat and his voice echoed across the stands that were jam packed with students, other guests and the press covering the final task. "Champions, this task will test not only your magical prowess, but also your ability to focus under pressure, your ability to cooperate, and your leadership. You will be given a list of ingredients that can be found in the forbidden forest and surrounding grounds. Once you have collected them all, you will return to this location and concoct the brew, after which you will administer the potion to your subject. The first champion to produce favorable results with their subject will be the winner."

Igor met Oblonsky's eyes, both carried the same look of suspicion. It sounded too simple. Obviously there was a catch. Was something going to stand in the way of them finding ingredients? Perhaps something would hinder their ability to brew. And what of these subjects?

Oblonsky's eyes moved to a long curtian drawn across half of the stage and Igor followed his eyes. He must think the answer was behind that curtain. Oblonsky sighed loudly with a growling quality. Whatever it was, he had already figured it out. He walked closer to Igor and put an uncharacteristically gentle hand on his favorite student's shoulder. "Prepare yourself my son," he whispered gravely.

"Mr. Filch! Open the curtain!" Flich scrambled over to the curtain and began to push the heavy fabric aside. He moved it a few meters when his foot began tangled in the velvet. He struggled to free it, turning to one side but the fabric merely wrapped around him. The more he turned the more he mummified himself until the entire curtain just fell and the brass rob by which it was suspended came crashing down on his head nearly knocking him out cold. Igor noticed Dumbledore rolling his eyes to the ceiling and the crowd laughed. But their laughter was short lived when they saw what the curtain had concealed. There on three cots were the seeming lifeless bodies of Lily Evans, Leopold Levin and Igor's beloved Natalia Smith.

"It seems you have double the pressure Igor." Oblonsky said flatly, but with enough volume to convey his dislike to Whipp. Truly this was extra pressure to have his girl and his mate in such a state. But Igor chose to tune him out, for a sense of purpose was descending upon him like he had never experienced. This competition now meant something to him. It was more than a game. He heard Fiona choke back a sob. Potter's breathing became loud and shallow, but Igor did not acknowledge them. For he saw nothing, heard nothing, felt nothing except his Lavender girl, his Kitten, his Natalia.

Whipp commanded their attention. "The test subjects have been given a very powerful Draught of the Living Death It will be our champions' job to find the ingredients for the antidote, Wiggenweld Potion. All of the ingredients may be located on the grounds and surrounding areas. The potion must be completed and administered within three hours to avoid permanent damage to your subjects or death. Take two minutes to prepare yourself and then I shall signal the start."

Potter immediately began a protest. "This is completely outrageous! How can you allow this?"

"Enough, Mr. Potter. The task is set. I suggest you use this time to compose yourself and prepare your strategy." Whipp waved him off. Potter looked at Dumbledore for back-up but the old wizard merely sighed and pulled his student to the side for a quiet discussion.

Igor stepped forward and asked Whipp, "May I?" He asked, nodding toward Natalia.

"Certainly."

He stepped over to Natalia's barely breathing body and knelt down and stroked her hair. With the calm that only comes through necessity he whispered, "Kitten, I don't know if you can hear me but you have nothing to fear. This is why you have me. You rest. I'll take care of everything." He kissed her forehead and turned to go back to Oblonsky. He passed Leven and patted his shoulder. "Enjoy your nap comrade. I'm taking your girlfriend to the forbidden forest."

Fiona, who was standing beside Levin's motionless form, glared at him.

"Oh, relax. I'm joking. It's what we do." He shrugged attempting to lighten her mood so she could do this, for she looked wound as tight a drum. "Come on, we'll work together. Do you think I would let anything happen to Levin? He's my best mate." She smiled weakly at him as they joined a very jumpy James Potter at the edge of the stage. All were given their brooms, a list of ingredients and identical pouches to collect their findings.

"Mr. Filch," Whipp bellowed at the gangly man who had recovered enough to be standing behind a cannon and ready to light a fuse. "At my order you will sound the cannon to signal the start of the.." BOOM! Filch bungled it as always and the three champions quickly mounted their broom and flew across the grounds. Potter immediately went his own way to the forest while Fiona followed Igor towards the Black Lake. He landed on the shore by a very green patch of land which was home to lots of plant life.

"We can quickly pick up quite a few of the ingredients here." He said decisively. Let's get the easy ones now and quickly, then we can go after the more difficult ones. As Oblonsky always says, 'Go for the low hanging fruit first.' Now read me the list."

"Ahhh, Oui." Fiona nervously fumbled for the list. "I'm not sure where some of these are found. I get them from the apothecary."

"Just read the list." He snapped impatiently.

"Moly Petals."

"Moly Petals, right. They're over here. Follow me. Natalia and I took a walk along the shore one evening and she pointed them out. Yes look right here. Grab as much as we can." They knelt and each collected fistfuls of the luminous petals.

"I think zat's enough Igor."

"Fine. What else?"

"Boom Berry juice."

"Easy. Right over here." He led her a few meters to a large Boom Berry bush and they picked an excess amount of the berries.

"Next."

"Salamander Blood."

"Simple. Levin and I have been catching those slippery little bastards since we were kids. Come on." He led her further down the shore to a place with massive hunks of driftwood. "They love to hide in those." He motioned her over and they spent the next fifteen minutes focused on chasing salamanders. Igor was responsible for killing them quickly as Fiona was predictably squeamish.

"Igor, flooberworms are on this list. We have to get their mucus."

"Lovely," he snarled, getting impatient with these tedious tasks and knowing there was a long list still to go. "Come away from the water. If we dig in the dirt further from shore, we'll find some. Levin and I used to use them as bait."

"You and Leopold have been friends all your lives haven't you?" She said softly while digging beside him.

"Ya!" He barely acknowledged her, focused on the task before them.

"This is a long list Igor," she despaired.

He stopped digging and looked at her. "Fiona, we can do this. You just have to stifle your emotions and let's get to it. Now go, dig faster."

"Right. I know." She kept digging and no longer bothered him.

They spent the next forty five minutes collecting the required ingredients along the shore line, fishing for Lionfish to harvest their spines, and even sneaking into the green house to steal a few more items including three mandrakes that gave them fits when they tried to stuff them into the bags.

"We'll have to go into the forest for the rest of it," Fiona observed.

"Fine. What else is on the list?" He hissed

"Just one thing."

"Which is?"

"Unicorn Horn."

"What?" Igor stamped his foot in frustration. "Where are we going to get a fucking Unicorn horn?"

"From… a… Unicorn." She drew out her words, obviously annoyed with his presumably rhetorical question.

He merely glared at her. "Why didn't you tell me there was a fucking Unicorn horn on the list?"

"Vat am I? Your secretary? You had a copy of the list too."

"Obviously I didn't see it or we wouldn't have been mucking around with all this other shit."

"Ey, ve need all dees other shit too. And you're ze one running off at the mouth about low hanging fruit and bossing me around."

"Bossing you around? You were falling the fuck apart back there."

"You're an arse Karkaroff!" she hissed at him. "Everything everyone says about you is true." Fiona turned and stalked off to find her broom.

"And what exactly does that mean?" He marched after her. "What do they say about me?"

"That you're a self absorbed, irresponsible fop!" She continued on her way, not turning to address him.

"Fop? I'm not a fop."

She turned to taunt him. "Fop! Fop! Fop!" Then she stalked off again.

He watched her walk away and thought of Natalia. That was the same first impression she had of him, and also how she had reacted to him. She had dismissed him as superficial, thought him to be vain, but now that was all changed. Was he different or was it merely that she saw more in him? He wasn't certain but he felt different. They were in love. A chill ran through him as he refocused on what he was really fighting for. "Fiona wait!" He ran after her. "Wait. I'm sorry! I…I just…look we'll never get this if we don't work together." She ignored him but he persisted. "Come on. You can hate me later, right now think of Levin."

She scowled at him for a moment. "Fine. Lead ze vay."

"Stick close. Accio broomsticks." The broomsticks arrived and they headed in the direction of the forbidden forest. They dodged in and out of the trees in a now familiar pattern, and just like they had in the last task, happened upon Potter. This time he was face to face with an enormous virgin white unicorn. His wand was drawn and aimed at the majestic beast but it was shaking and he looked unnerved.

"Ve call zees déjà vu!" Fiona announced in a surprisingly sadistic for her.

"Well done Potter. You've cornered a rare beast." Igor said softly, so as not to frighten the unicorn.

"Do it Potter! Do it now and let's get back to ze pitch." Fiona hissed. Igor looked at her with surprise. A dreamy little girl like Fiona encouraging the murder of an innocent animal was shocking. This contest was bringing out the worst in all of them.

"I can't do it." Potter's voice trembled. "I can't kill a Unicorn. Just look at him. He's magnificent. Plus it's bad luck. I could be cursed for a very long time and I need luck at the moment."

Igor stepped forward. "Luck has nothing to do with it. If it did, we'd flip a galleon and the whole thing would be done. You need skill, knowledge and nerve."

"This has nothing to do with losing my nerve." Potter snapped.

"No, but it has everything to do with knowledge." Igor stepped closer to the beast. "May I?" He looked back at Potter.

Potter looked at him before responding with some reluctance, "All right, have a go."

Igor stepped closer to the beast and held out his hand, while lowering his head. The unicorn in turn stepped forward and nuzzled his hand. Igor edged closer to the animal and positioned himself close to it's pinkish ear. He began to whisper something in the animal's ear in Russian. The beast's ears seemed to perk up, then it bent one leg and bowed low, and it's horn began to glow.

"What's happening?" Fiona asked.

"Shh!" Igor hushed her. The horn continued to glow bright white and then a crack of blue appeared across the horn. The crack intensified and widened until the top section of the horn detached and levitated into Igor's hand. He turned to the others and smiled. "And that," he remarked, tossing the horn in the air and catching it, "is how it's done."

"How did you do that?" Potter barked.

"Old Russian magic." Igor flashed a smile, obviously pleased with himself.

"Hand it over." Potter reached forward and tried to snatch the horn.

"No way." Igor was too quick and too tall, raising it high over his head and well out of the grasp of his opponent.

"I found the unicorn." Potter protested.

Igor leaned forward with a smile designed to taunt, still with the horn well above his head. "I got the horn."

Potter jumped and tried again to snatch the horn but Igor raised it higher still and Potter came down empty handed as Igor snickered.

"Would you rather muck about arguing or get back to the pitch and get this potion together? You don't have enough time to get the other ingredients, and we won't have time to find another unicorn. Let's get back and start brewing. It's a lengthy process with plenty of room for error. Think with your head and not your onions for a change. Sorry Fiona." Igor turned his head slightly in her direction to apologize for his salty language.

Fiona rolled her eyes. "Eh iz right Potter." She extended her hand. "Let's go back to Lily now."

Hearing the same thing from Fiona seemed to be the tipping point for Potter. He relented and mounted his broom. Before pushing off, he scowled at Igor. "Don't try to cheat me, or I will level you."

Igor responded with a mocking expression, "Ooooo, I'm shaking in my boots," he said sarcastically.

"Enough Igor!" We've no time for zees. Let's go." Fiona pushed off. Potter followed and Igor joined them.

It wasn't long before they landed on the pitch to the cheers of their fellow students, and ran over to the work table erected not far from the sleeping bodies of their loved ones.

Igor said a silent prayer for Natalia, and then focused. "Have either of you concocted this brew before?"

"Yes, but Lily helped me through it," Potter responded while looking not at Igor, but his lovely ginger girl lying motionless and helpless on the cot. "You?"

"Just once. It took forever for me to get it right." Igor was ashamed to admit it, but lying to enhance his reputation would only harm Natalia.

"It's a very tricky and temperamental potion."

"Oh geev me zat!" Fiona snatched the instructions from Potter's hand. "I'm top of my class and made this successfully at least five times. You have to go slow though."

"Fine, we'll work together." Igor nodded and James shrugged in agreement.

Fiona immediately gave them their assignments. "James, go over zeez proportions carefully and start measuring ingredients. Igor, you're ze outdoorsman. You set about stewing these Mandrakes. I don't have the stomach for it." So the each set about their tasks, working diligently until Fiona proudly announced forty-five minutes later, "It's finished."

"Monsiur Whipp, vould you like to inspect it?"

"Yes." He motioned Slughorn over to join him and they stirred it while watching the color and smelling the odor carefully.

Slughorn smiled, "I daresay that's as fine a brew as I've ever seen. Well done Lafayette."

"Merci, professor."

"Unfortunately it won't work my dear."

All the champions gaped at him in horror.

"Say what you mean!" Igor demanded frantically.

"Well, by boy you've not adjusted your proportions. There's certainly enough for one and if you don't spill a drop, you have two doses, but to divide this three ways would make it ineffective."

"Potter you IDIOT!" Fiona hissed, and then she began rattling off a tirade of French curses that no one understood but which made Madame Maxine blush.

"How was I supposed to know?" Potter whined in protest.

"You could have read it or asked." Igor snarled and pushed Potter in the chest knocking him back a meter before Oblonsky jumped between them and angled him away.

"This won't help Natalia. Calm yourself." Oblonsky urged him and Igor quickly saw the logic and calmed himself.

"Time is running out champions. You must decide. Who gets the potion?"

_AN: Dah Dah DAAAAAHHHHHH! Am I horrible to stop right there? Well sorry, but you'll just have to wait till our next episode? Oh Poor Igor. I just want to hug him:) Oh hey if I don't get the next chapter up by June 30th, just know that that's Pedja Bjelac's birthday (the guy who plays Karkaroff in Goblet of Fire). The big five-oh this year I think...Really? That's what fifty looks like? Not bad Mr. B! ((((Hugs from me))))_


	40. Chapter 40 Rescue me

CHAPTER FORTY

Rescue Me

"Give me that!" James Potter lunged violently for the precious cauldron of potion with a wild, rabid look in his eyes and knocked Fiona off her feet in the process. Igor however, after a year as an internationally ranked seeker, had the reflexes of a tiger and grabbed Potter's hand before he could reach it.

"You imbecile!" Igor snarled with narrowed eyes that could have frightened the devil himself. "Pull yourself together before you spill it. And help Miss Lafayette up like a gentleman, before I rip the hide off you."

Potter shook and sniffed but realized he was outmatched and had no choice but to do as he was told and help a very annoyed Fiona to her feet. He extended a hand to her but she smacked it aside and rose on her own accord before she immediately went to Levin's side. Potter then turned back to Igor. "That potion is _mine_ Karkaroff. I know these woods better than either of you. You couldn't possibly have gotten the unicorn horn without me. It's mine."

"You vere no vhere near getting zat horn vhen ve came along. Igor knew ze spell not you. Ve all worked on zat potion Monsieur Potter. You have no more right to it zan any of us." Fiona said calmly, while loving stroking Levin's hair.

"Tick, tock champions." Whipp mused. "This bickering is doing nothing but costing them precious time."

"She's right Potter." Igor was now toe-to-toe with Potter and towering over him by at least six inches. "You seem to make assertions of convenient facts while omitting others." Igor's eyes were narrowed for a fight as he gripped his wand tightly while cracking each knuckle one at a time on his free hand.

"She's going to DIE!" Potter screamed at him while gesturing back to Lily. "I can't let that happen!" His eyes bugged out of his head. He was quite mad with fear and it was glaringly obvious that he would fight to the death to save Lily, even if he knew he would get the shit kicked out of him. "I won't let it happen. I won't live without her." He now spoke in lower tones, but still looked defiantly up at Igor and readied himself to duel. Igor knew he could easily level this boy. He had done it before, but something about his adversary's manner stopped him. It suddenly occurred to him that the two of them were no different in their passions; just in the way they handled them.

"They're all going to die if ve don't resolve this quickly." Though she was trying to sound brave, Igor noticed two tears gracefully flowing down her cheeks. "Zees is no time to fight among ourselves. Ve have to think." She appeared steady, but when she turned her face back to Leopold Levin her shoulders shook.

It warmed Igor's heart that his dearest friend now had such a lovely witch who loved him so earnestly. He glanced past her to the crowd of students, all watching wide eyed and deathly silent as they drank in the drama. Front and center in the Slytherin box he could see the stark outline of Severus Snape, on his feet with terror in his eyes visible even from a distance.

"The potion is MINE, Karkaroff. You know it as well as I." Potter words sounded threatening even if they were false.

Such a greedy bastard deserved a painful hex, but there was no time for that. He looked back at Natalia. She was sleeping peacefully, but for how much longer? He couldn't sacrifice others for his own needs, but neither could he let her go. They could develop some kind of manner to settle it, but that would waste precious time and what if he lost? He couldn't lose. If he lost, he would seize the potion anyway and save her. The contest that had been so important suddenly seemed so trivial and further, he resented the committee for putting the three of them in this position. He knew what he had to do.

"How much time do they have Mr. Whipp?"

"About thirty minutes, give or take."

"That's cutting it close." The odds weren't great but he was determined. "The potion took us forty five minutes to brew though for a master it could be done in thirty minutes."

"Then what is your solution Mr. Karkaroff? Can you lead the others out of this?"

Could he? Could he lead them? Was he tough enough? He didn't know anything other than that he couldn't do it on his own. Normally he relied on Levin or Natalia when he needed someone most, but now he did not have them. Oh, if only Natalia were here to advise him, what would she tell him? Who would she turn to? Of course. The answer was suddenly simple and without thinking any further, Igor bolted over to the edge of the scaffolding. "Severus!" He called loudly, waving his arms wildly. "Now! I need you!"

Severus was anxious to do anything besides standing there powerless while Lily's fate rested in Potter's incompetent hands, and wasted no time scrambling down the stairs of the Slytherin box and making his way to Igor and his beloved.

Upon seeing Severus approach, he turned back to Whipp, "Mr. Whipp, let Miss Lafayette divide the potion equally between Levin and Evans. I have enough ingredients here to brew another batch but I can't do it alone if I'm to be in time to save Natalia."

Whipp's eyes narrowed, forming a deep crease between them. "Are you certain Mr. Karkaroff? You're going to sacrifice the potion to your competitors?"

Igor looked sheepishly at Headmaster Oblonsky, fearing his disapproval but not enough to change his mind. "Yes sir. They are both too distraught to concentrate and would surely botch the brew. I can do this but I'll need the help of my friend Severus."

As if on cue Severus burst through the curtains and gawked in horror at Lily, who's lips were beginning to turn blue from slowed circulation. The color promptly drained from his face and the change was only emphasized by the dark hair stringing around his face.

"Help? I'm sorry Mr. Karkaroff, but the committee will frown on that." Whipp shook his head. "It may cost you this task as well as the tournament. Are you certain you can't come up with another solution?"

Igor shook his head violently. "I don't care. I know what's right and this is right. None of this means anything without Natalia. Severus, we need you." He motioned Severus over. "There is only enough potion for two people. I'm willing to let the others have it but we only have thirty minutes to brew another batch or Natalia may not survive. How fast can you concoct the antidote?"

Severus looked back at Lily, then to Natalia. "Are you sure the first brew was right?"

"Positive."

With supreme conviction and a curt nod Severus replied, "I can do it in twenty."

"You're sure?" Igor looked deep into his eyes. "If you're just saying that I'll murder you."

"If we work together and you don't make stupid mistakes, we can do it in fifteen, but we don't have time to argue about it."

"Done." Igor was relieved the decision was made. He barked at Whipp, "Give them the potion."

Immediately, and without regret, Igor turned his back on victory in favor of love. "Here are the ingredients we didn't use." He shoved the pouch into the hands of Snape, who scrambled over to the table to begin his work. Fiona and Potter set about carefully dividing the first potion while Igor went over to Natalia and bent low so he could whisper into her ear. "It's all right, my love." He kissed her cheek and once more inhaled her lavender scent for luck. "Can you hear what's happening? Don't be afraid. Severus and I are going to take care of you. We won't let anything bad happen to you, Kitten."

"Karkaroff!" Severus barked over his shoulder, "There's no time for that. You can whisper sweet nothings in her ear later. Get over here and let's get going!"

Igor joined him at the work table. "You're the boss. What do you want me to do?"

"Stew that last bleeding mandrake and don't let him squawk too much, breaks my concentration. Then start prepping those ingredients, and don't take short cuts. You might think you're saving time but if you botch it we don't have time to do it twice."

Igor went to work without another word, stuffing the last unsuspecting mandrake unmercifully into a boiling pot before he even knew what was happening. Then he began shaving and grinding various ingredients while Severus began to brew the potion. The mini-dramas unfolding around them occasionally distracted Igor. Severus however was a mass of concentration, working like an artist lost in the world he was creating.

Behind them, they could hear Fiona speaking in hushed tones. Then Levin emerged from his fog, coughing and gasping for breath. "Oh my Leo." Fiona cradled his head against her ample bosom. Igor turned to visually confirm that Levin was responding, and snickered at the sight before him. That was an interesting way to wake up. Although Levin might well survive the contest, he might be suffocated by his girlfriend's enormous breasts. What a way to go.

"Where is the mint?" Snapped Severus, which jerked Igor's attention back to the table.

"Right here." Igor handed it to him. "Did I grind that finely enough?"

"Yes, yes." Severus was impatient.

"Is that burner hot enough?" Igor asked, wanting to help even more.

"Of course it is. You don't want me to scorch it do you?"

"No."

"Hand me the Salamander blood. Then start shredding the dittany."

"Oh, James, you saved me!" Lily exclaimed behind them, coming out of her coma.

"Ahh Lily." The relief was overflowing in Potter's voice. "I love you so much!"

Their tender expressions broke Severus' concentration, for he paused and slowly turned his eyes in their direction, though his face did not move. Igor however was directly across the table from him and witnessed the excruciating pain in his eyes. It would not do for him to be distracted from this project or leave in anger before it was finished.

"Severus," Igor said softly. "Please."

Severus moved his eyes to meet Igor's but his expression did not change. It was a rare, quiet but raw display of emotion from the normally reserved young man.

"I know." Igor whispered. "But please, for Natalia."

Severus' nod was almost imperceptible but he went immediately back to his work.

Levin pulled himself up to a seated position and observed the speed brewing nearby. He motioned for Fiona to help him over to his friend. She threw an arm under his shoulder and soon they hobbled over to the table.

"What's going on?" He asked, sounding a little stoned.

"Shhhh!" Igor hissed at him. "We have..." he looked up at the gigantic clock on the outside of Hogwarts, "ten minutes to get this brewed and into Natalia's system. Don't go breaking our concentration with idle chitchat."

Fiona pulled up a stool for Levin to sit on while he watched. "Here," she handed him a knife and the Lionfish spines. You start chopping these as finely as you can get them. Igor hand me the boom berries and I'll start squeezing the juice out of them."

"Don't cut those Fiona, crush them with the side of your knife. It speeds up the absorption rate." Severus snapped.

"Really?" Fiona remarked.

"Don't question me just do it. We don't have much time."

No one questioned him further and within three minutes, they had a complete potion.

"Is it done?" Igor asked anxiously, while peering over Snape's shoulder.

"Looks to be. Let's just pour out half, that way if there is an error, we can go back and rework the existing brew."

"Good idea," said Fiona.

Igor poured out half the brew and handed the rest back to Severus before going quickly to Natalia's side. He gently cradled her head in his hand, raising it slightly. He used the tip of the vile to part her lips and began to pour the potion into her mouth. "Here darling, drink up. This is what you need. I told you I would save you." Igor whispered gravely, and continued pouring until the vile was empty. Then he watched her with eager anticipation, but nothing happened. He waited, and waited, but still nothing. His breath became labored and his eyes widened with horror as he waited. "Severus. Severus what's wrong?" His voice was frantic and at least an octave higher than normal. "It's not working. What's wrong? Why isn't she waking up?"

Severus could not answer. He merely shook his head and looked wide-eyed from Natalia, then back to the potion. "I don't know. We did everything perfectly. Perhaps I rushed it. Maybe it needs more dittany."

"What else can we do Severus?" Igor asked without taking his eyes from Natalia. "Tell me quickly, I need options, she's not going to…" He choked and his head sunk forward, resting on her chest. "Oh Merlin, if she doesn't…" He pulled her closer to him. "Natalia, please. Please wake up my love I can't live if you don't. Oh please…" He shook her gently but she remained comatose. He laid her back down on the pillow and in an act of complete desperation, and only because he'd heard it in the fairy tales of his childhood, kissed her lips softly. "Please come back to me, my love."

Immediately and miraculously, she drew breath and her head moved to the side. Her eyes fluttered and finally opened. She focused on his face but appeared disoriented. He began to worry that being out for so long had done some kind of permanent damage. "Natalia, can you hear me? If you understand, please say something."

She smiled dreamily and answered him with one word, "Yes."

He exhaled first with relief for her safety before he realized what she was truly saying. "Yes? Are you saying 'yes' to me? To what I asked you yesterday?"

"Yes." She breathed with a dreamy smile and heavily lidded eyes.

He collapsed on top of her and buried his face in her shoulder hiding a single tear of joy that broke free when he was distracted. "Ah, my love."

The crowd cheered wildly, loving a good melodrama with a happy ending. Whipp huddled in the back with the Headmasters for a few moments before once again stepping to the edge of the stage and placing his wand to his throat. "May I have your attention please? The Tri-Wizard Tournament recognizes magical ability, courage, nobility, cooperation, and leadership. Today's contest was designed to test all those qualities, though not in the most obvious manner. Although Mr. Potter and Miss Lafayette were technically the first to save their loved ones, they were only able to do so through the noble sacrifices of Mr. Karkaroff. Mr. Karkaroff allowed them to succeed before him, while he chose to rely upon his wits and being intelligent enough to recognize a weakness and enlist help from our most expert student Mr. Snape to overcome it. He sought only to do what was right, rather than win at the expense of another. Therefore, it is with great pleasure that I declare Mr. Karkaroff the winner of the third task, with Miss Lafayette being second, and Mr. Potter third. Mr. Karkaroff, you are the overall Tri-Wizard Champion."

The Gryffindor students began to boo and hiss quite loudly, but they were quickly drowned out by the cheers of all the other contingencies.

Igor looked up in disbelief but only for a moment before his head fell forward, his hair hiding him behind its wavy curtain. While normally, he felt exaltation in victory, today he felt only relief. Natalia pushed the wavy curtain of tresses away enough to enter and speak to him. "You did it Igor. I knew you could do it."

"I love you." He took her by both cheeks and gave her a firm lingering kiss.

"You won." She whispered into his mouth.

"I've won you. That's all that matters."

The next few minutes were a blur. Igor was bombarded by Oblonsky and the other Headmasters congratulating him. Levin and Fiona hugged both he and Nat, and began to review the play by play. Potter reluctantly congratulated him but soon turned his attention back to Lily. For all of his posturing, he seemed content with having his ginger beauty safe so the loss did not bother him. Severus slinked off into the background, loathing the attention he was getting. Photographers snapped photographs all about them, particularly shots at all angles of Igor and Natalia. A very annoying woman they later learned to be Rita Skeeter peppered him with questions that he ignored. His year on the Quidditch circuit had taught him how to handle overly aggressive reporters like her.

"Natalia, can you sit up?"

"Yes, I think so, with your help please."

He eased an arm around her shoulder and brought her up to a seated position. "Easy darling. Don't get up too fast."

"I'm right as rain Igor, thanks to you." She smiled at him and his heart warmed. He couldn't wait to be alone with her, though considering what she'd been through today, his sexual needs would not be indulged. No matter. It was enough to be close to her after such a horrific day.

"Excellent work my son." The booming voice of his father, Alexi Karkaroff got his attention along with the firm slap of his hand on Igor's shoulder.

"Father." Igor jumped to attention and his demeanor changed suddenly. "I didn't know you were coming."

Natalia felt his change immediately and her heart ached just a little. It seemed her worst fears were at least partially true. Igor was nervous.

"Surprise." Mr. Karkaroff shrugged much in the manner that Igor tended to and Natalia noticed the many similarities between the two. Both had a casual air of elegance about them, which made them effortlessly handsome. They shared the same strong profile, dark eyes and high Slavic cheekbones. They were both tall with thick dark manes, though the senior Mr. Karkaroff was slightly grey at his temples and had a receding hairline which in Natalia's opinion didn't detract from his looks one bit. This trait merely made him more distinguished. Behind him stood another tall young man that favored them in his strong profile and height, but his hair was a bit thinner and his shoulders were not as broad. No doubt he was related in some way.

"Now let me meet the witch so captivating that you risked everything for."

"Oh, ah…yes…" Igor turned to Natalia and took her hand. She noticed his palms were suddenly clammy. "Father, this is Natalia Smith."

She managed to stand, wanting desperately to make a positive impression and get off on the right foot. He took her hand and helped her, then raised it to his lips and kissed her fingertips lightly. "Natalia is a lovely name. Are your parents of Slavic decent?"

Before she could answer, Igor interrupted them. "And this is my brother Konstantine."

Konstantine stepped forward and extended his hand, but he merely shook hers in a very businesslike manner, with none of the warmth and grace of his father or brother.

"Miss…Smith." He acknowledged her but it wasn't friendly at all and Natalia's stomach flipped.

"Natalia," Severus interrupted them and she was grateful for him. "Excuse me but Poppy would like to check you and the others over, just to make sure the potion isn't having any unpleasant side effects. We pulled that last batch together rather quickly I'm afraid."

"Oh yes." She stammered, still a bit unsteady. "Mr. Karkaroff, will you please excuse me for a moment?"

"Certainly." He eyed her, but she was unable to read anything from his expression.

"I'll be right back Igor."

"Take your time Natalia. Severus, will you make sure Poppy is thorough?"

"She is always thorough." He hissed and Igor wondered if he was still upset about Lily or if there was something else on his mind.

"She is lovely son." Mr. Karkaroff said after they left.

"Isn't she though?" Igor smiled after them, then looked hopefully at his father for his true opinion.

Mr. Karkaroff pursed his lips together and appraised his middle son. "You look very happy."

"She makes me very happy." Just beyond his father he saw Konstantine roll his eyes. He made a mental note to fix him later when they were alone. Prat.

"When may I meet her family?"

Igor's blood went cold for he knew what was coming. He took a deep breath and confessed. "She has none."

"Excuse me? What does this mean?"

"It means she has no family. She is an orphan."

"Ha!" He snorted and Igor's blood turned from ice to boiling. "Well then have your fun." He snickered with a twinkle in his eye. "You're still young after all and there's plenty of time for a wife later."

Igor did not see the humor and in a rare display, stood up to him. "What is that supposed to mean?"

"Nothing." Mr. Karkaroff drew his lips together in an attempt to stifle his grin. Behind him Konstantine smirked. "Have your fun."

"I'm serious about her." Igor said sincerely. "She's the one father."

"The one for the moment. Just like Sasha was the one and Tina was the one and Angela was the one and Shelley was the one." He gestured in a circular motion with his hands as he enumerated his son's list of passing fancies. "She is one of many ones."

"No father. It's not like that. It's different this time." Igor said in a low tone, looking over his shoulder and living in fear that Rita Skeeter would here his father's humiliating ramblings.

"Fignja'! You possess less devotion than a feral cat. This will run its course." He attempted to make light of the situation but Igor was undeterred.

"It will NOT." Igor frowned. "I've never been more sure of anything."

His father appraised him for a moment and then backed off. "Well just the same, I'll not worry your mother with it just yet. Get yourself together. I want to have dinner with you and your Headmaster before we leave."

Igor looked at him questioningly.

"Oh well fine, bring your little pop tart too."

"Don't call her that father." Igor whispered gravely for he had never corrected his father. Konstantine gaped at him.

His father looked quizzically at him for a moment before smiling sadly. "Please accept my apologies. I will be more respectful towards those you feel strongly about."

"Thank you father."

"I'll gather Oblonsky and meet you there."

"Yes, sir."

Once Igor knew that Natalia was all right, he returned to the ship, changed clothes quickly and then left to meet her in the courtyard. He was attired in a black t-shirt with a dark jacket and jeans that his father was sure to disapprove of. Natalia was already waiting for him when he arrived. She looked stunning in snug white denim with a green sweater he hadn't seen before.

"There's my hero." She greeted him with a smile.

Igor eyed her critically, looking for anything his father might find fault with. She looked so hopeful and innocent that he couldn't discourage her and tell her how to behave, but his stomach was in knots. Appearance wise, she couldn't have done better, beautiful easy grace without looking like she was trying too hard. "You look lovely." But then he wondered out loud, "Is that sweater new? I've never seen you wear it."

Natalia seemed put off by the question. Had he known the real reason that it was from Lucius, he would have felt shame that he didn't shower her with gifts. But he did not know and accepted her answer at face value. "Sasha 's hand me down. She didn't like the color."

"It looks nice with my crest. I'm glad you still wear it." He touched the Durmstrang crest around her neck.

"I never take it off."

He trailed his fingers down her chest seductively but then stopped when he reached her heart. "Are you feeling all right? Your heart is about to jump out of your chest."

"Oh," she blushed slightly. I'm just nervous. I really want your father and brother to like me. I don't think I made a very good first impression."

"Why would you think that?"

"Your brother was scowling and you look like a nervous wreck, worse than before the task."

"Nervous? Not me," he lied and pulled her against him. "I'm just exhausted. After this is all over you and I have to go on holiday. I need a break."

"Holiday?"

"Yes." He smiled and pulled back so he could meet her eyes. "Doesn't that sound good? A week or two alone with nothing to do but be together, what could be better?"

Natalia grinned from ear to ear and he knew he had scored a few points. "That sounds heavenly."

"It will be." He sighed heavily. "Now let's get this wretched dinner over with." He took her hand and dragged her along to The Three Broomsticks.

Dinner went smoothly enough for the Karkaroff men had impeccable manners and if anything was amiss, they did not show it. Oblonsky was more charming than usual and Rosemerta even joined them for a time before her duties dragged her away. After dinner, Igor challenged Konstantine to a game of wizard darts. The challenge was accepted and Natalia joined them, leaving Mr. Karkaroff and Oblonsky alone at the table enjoying a cognac.

Oblonsky seemed to read his old friend's mind. "She is a lovely girl, Alexei. Igor could do no better in terms of character. Natalia is intelligent, hardworking, top of her class, very attentive to him, but keeps him on his toes. She doesn't put up with his foolishness. Well I'm sure you noticed how his marks have improved this year. That is all her influence. She had him engaged in productive pursuits rather than his usual carousing."

"I suppose that's something," Alexi mumbled before taking a drink of cognac and then swirling the liquid around in the glass. "But her lack of breeding…"

Oblonsky scoffed at him. "Of all people I would think you would have learning that lineage isn't everything. I certainly learned that lesson the hard way. I won't live my life like that anymore. Igor has grown into a fine young man. You can't live his life for him. Just let him be happy. After all it's the seventies."

"His happiness is paramount. But you can't be too careful with these witches. They can ruin you."

"Still bitter after all these years?" Oblonsky raised his eyebrows naughtily.

Alexei shot him a dirty look.

"Come, come, that was 25 years ago."

"Feels like yesterday." He swilled his cognac again, wincing with the burn after an enormous gulp.

"Ah I see." Oblonsky leaned back in his chair, obviously having an epiphany of some sort. "It all makes sense to me now. Natalia does favor her. I hadn't noticed before. You have similar tastes. You don't think…"

"Stop it! You always were a gossip. Worse than an old witch always spinning your webs. I never want to speak of that ….witch again." He hissed.

Oblonsky snickered at the comparison. "All right. Just give her a chance. Igor is a smart young man. He won't' align your family with bad company."

Konstantine easily bested his brother two games out of three. "You're out of practice Igor. Losing your touch. Natalia must be quite a lovely distraction." Konstantine smiled at her, cheeks red from drink. It made Natalia turn crimson, for she barely knew him.

"That she is." Igor moved in to kiss her quickly on the cheek, marking his territory. "But we've been studying and preparing for the tournament. So you see things are not a lurid as you insinuate." He looked over his shoulder then whispered in Natalia's ear. "At least as far as he knows." Natalia giggled and pushed his shoulder softly.

Konstantine watched them for a moment with a smile curling on one side of his lips. "Natalia, do you play?"

"A little. Are you up for a game?"

"Careful Konstantine, she's a shark."

"I don't believe it."

"Igor don't tell such lies." She winked at him. "I'm up for it. Care to make a wager?"

"A wager? Certainly. Igor keeps secrets you know. If I win, you have to tell me how you met."

"All right then. If I win, you have to tell me his most embarrassing story."

"I don't like this one bit." Igor laughed. I'm not even playing and I know I will lose.

"Then go hang out with father." Konstantine waved him off. "We have to leave soon anyway."

Igor shrugged and started to relax. She was winning over Konstantine and that was huge. He was extremely rigid and impossible to please. If he liked her, it would be easier, for as the eldest son, his opinion carried weight within the family that Igor's did not. With renewed faith he rejoined his father who was now sitting nearer the fire. Oblonsky was at the bar romancing Rosemerta, who was smiling at him and seemingly promising something with her eyes. He sat down beside his father but did not speak, for he didn't know where to start after their unproductive conversation earlier in the day.

"Her charm matches her beauty." The senior Karkaroff nodded in Natalia's direction.

"I'm glad you think so."

"Konstantine even seems to like her and you know how he can be."

"Father please just give her a chance. She means the world to me." Igor's voice cracked, exposing his weakness.

"And what does a witch like that see in you?"

Igor stared blankly at him in mild shock at such an insult from his own flesh and blood. "She loves me father."

"How do you know? You can't trust these witches especially a man in your position. Does she love you for the exceptional wizard you are? Or is she some kind of social climber?"

"She is NOT!" He hissed indignantly. "Natalia doesn't care about such things."

"She's in Slytherin isn't she?"

"Can't you just be happy for me?"

"I want to be happy for you, but I think she will eventually bring you misery. I love you Igor, I just want you to benefit from my wisdom and hindsight."

"I'm not you and she's not mother. What we have is electric."

His father rolled his eyes and Igor immediately regretted his choice of words which made their relationship sound purely sexual.

Alexi Karkaroff had had enough. He rose to go. "When the fire goes out, and it will go out my boy, when times get tough, then and only then will you see what your relationship is made of. Until then all advice, particularly that from an old man such as I is useless." Alexi called to his eldest, "Konstantine! Let's go."

"Father please don't leave angry." Igor cringed under his father's wrath, for he so wanted to please him but could not compromise where Natalia was concerned.

"I am not angry Igor, merely sad for what I think will come to you one day." He embraced his son lovingly but Igor's arms remained at his side. He was too devastated to respond.

Konstantine said a kind farewell to Natalia. Their father waited at the door while Konstantine said goodbye to his brother.

I can see why you are attracted to her Igor." Igor looked up hopeful to have someone on his side. "She's got an amazing rack." He chuckled as he walked away to meet their father, leaving Igor destroyed.

He stood frozen. It was far worse than he had anticipated. Oblonsky was right. They were never going to accept Natalia. His mother would be ten times worse and make no pretense about her dislike and his sisters would fall in line as they always did. The only other family member with a remotely open heart on such matters was his youngest brother Ivan, and he was only eight so his opinion was of no consequence. As he aged, he would change and become just like them. Igor was loath to disappoint them in favor of a woman. In all his daydreams of finding the right witch, this predicament had never even occurred to him. He imagined it as idyllic, his parents and siblings embracing her as one of their own, but it was now painfully obvious that such a fantasy would never be. He had overestimated all of them. Levin and Oblonsky were right. Of course they had been right. They were always the voice of reason when Igor's imagination ran away with him. He felt foolish and suddenly ill and made to leave as he needed air in the worst way.

"Hey, where are you going?" Natalia's sweet voice stopped him. The touch of her hand on his shoulder made his body ache. He turned to face her and when he gazed upon her blameless face he felt even worse. She could read him like a book and her eyes immediately reflected her concern. "What's wrong?" He could not respond for he was still a bit shell shocked. "Igor tell me. You look so strange."

He recovered quickly and arranged his features into his typically confident smile. "Nothing to worry your pretty head over, Kitten." He kissed the top of her pretty head and lingered there for a moment, enjoying the softness of it and drinking in her heady lavender fragrance. Sadly, and though it broke his heart to hurt someone he loved, he knew precisely what must be done. "Natalia, please forgive me but I have to go. Oblonsky will see you back to the castle."

"Oblonsky?" Where are you going? Can I come with you? Are you going with your father?"

"I can't talk now. I'll see you tomorrow. I have to go." He took her cheeks in his hand and pulled her lips to meet his one more time before dashing out the door.

_AN: Hmmmm, now what is he to? Is he running away or does he have some other plan? Well of course you had to know he would win the TWT, our dashing young hero! And by the way, happy birthday today 6/30 to the eternally young Pedja Bjelac who played Iggy in the movie. It's the big 5-0 for him and he's still a complete stud muffin in my book! Raise your butter beers and toast him health and happiness...yes Severus that means you too and Lucius quit rolling your eyes before we go all fifty on you. _

_Thanks so much to all those who have favorited or put the story on their alert list. I'd love to hear what you think about it so please review or drop me a line! Hugs to Shelley, my most awesome beta!  
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	41. Chapter 41 The Springtime Of My Loving

CHAPTER FORTY-ONE

Natalia remained at The Three Broomsticks for several hours after Igor's abrupt departure longing for his return, but her hopes were in vain. Eventually she gave up on him and ascended the hill to the castle with a worried heart. As hard as she'd tried to make herself look as if she belonged, with her manners, her education and the expensive but regrettable choice of wearing the sweater from Lucius, the evening had been a fiasco. Though Igor's father was the perfect example of decorum, she could tell he did not approve. Even Igor's brother, whom she'd hoped to be more accepting as one of his contemporaries, seemed aloof and unimpressed. Then there was Igor's peculiar behavior, fleeing The Three Broomsticks with some vague explanation about an errand. Obviously he had no errand. Natalia knew full well that this was the beginning of the end of her fairy tale romance, and how she dreaded the end of something so beautiful. But then again, she knew all along it would come to this.

She stood alone in the courtyard near the castle entrance. It was nearly dark and the black outline of the Durmstrang ship haunted her like a specter against the purple sky. It was too painful to gaze upon and so she turned back to the castle entrance, but she dreaded going back to the Slytherin common room. After all the drama of the afternoon, the social climbers would be belayed and ready to climb over her on their way to be a part of some notoriety. It was too much to bear.

Bitter tears began to glow and she positioned herself on the other side of a shrub and angrily wiped her nose with the sleeve of her sweater. She had always taken pride in her belongings, taking excellent care of them but she hated this garment and all it represented. With a grunt of frustration she ripped it off and threw it to the ground. "Incendio!" she hissed, and the expensive cashmere went up in flames. As she watched it burn, the breeze picked up and she was suddenly cold. She then chastised herself for destroying an expensive garment. It was childish and foolish and made her tears flow stronger. She was so frustrated she didn't know what to do with herself. For lack of a better plan, she slumped against the castle wall, slid down, bowed her head on her bent knees and wept.

Igor entered the elaborately appointed establishment in the high rent district of Diagon Alley with his Tri-Wizard winnings in his pocket and his heart on his sleeve. His father was stalwart in his belief that Natalia was wrong for him. And though Igor had been prepared for some resistance, he thought he could persuade him. He wondered why his father couldn't see what he saw in her and how happy she made him. Not only was she charming and bright, but she also had a very good influence on him. Although Igor had always been a good student, this year his marks had been near perfect and he'd even won the tournament. It made him angry that none of this carried weight with his father and Igor knew he could not sway him.

So now here he was in this institution with one thing on his mind. He'd known the owners at one time. The shop specialized in magical jewels and his mother had pushed the match with the daughter of the proprietors. After the win today this should have been one of the happiest nights of his life, but instead he felt nauseated.

"Ah, Mr. Karkaroff," the mother of the girl swept gracefully into the room to greet him."How lovely to see you again. I'm sorry but Juliana is studying abroad in America this term."

"Hello Mrs. Grayson." He greeted her nervously, jamming his fists into his pockets as his eyes darted nervously around the room. "Actually, I'm here on business."

"Oh?"

"Yes. I would like to purchase an engagement ring."

Igor apparated from the little shop back to Hogwarts very close to lights out. He hadn't meant to take so long but he had important decisions to make. For the choice of the ring that hopefully would forever symbolize his love and devotion was of the upmost importance. He would present nothing less to her than the most perfect stone, with an absence of color or carbon. He had belabored the decision, annoying the proprietor who tried to push this ring and that one on him, but Igor would not be swayed, and didn't leave until he had selected a ring that he knew she would adore; one that would get her to say yes to him. He had agonized over it for engagement rings were not such a custom in his native land, but here witches set quite a store by them and what was important to her, was important to him.

After much deliberation he chose what he felt was the most accurate illustration of his lovely witch. The set was a heavy, strong platinum with an art deco design. Nothing frilly or delicate would do. He could hear her objections to something like that. "Igor, I can't work with that on. I might break it. It's too flashy." This was beautiful but such a clean design that it could pass for a man's ring. However what the setting lacked in flash, the diamond made up for in spades. Four carats, flawless and ostentatious. He thought about getting a smaller stone but then decided that the ring should also reflect a bit of him and his over the top manner, so he plunked down half of his Tri-Wizard winnings and walked out with the biggest stone he could get. Nothing was too good for her.

Rain misted down on him and thunder rumbled in the distance getting closer with each roll. Surely it would begin to pour any time now. The sensible thing in such weather and at such an hour would have been to go back to his ship and settle in for the night, but he was far too excited. His heart raced as he bounded quickly up the hill in hopes of sneaking into the castle and getting someone to fetch her from the Slytherin common room. He neared the castle entrance in the courtyard and was about to enter when a noise distracted him. It was the sound of someone sobbing and sniffing quietly, like they thought no one was around. It was coming from behind a shrub by the door. He paused and walked around it to investigate and his heart nearly stopped when he saw her, slumped over with her bare white shoulders beaded wet with rain and shivering as she rested her head on her knees.

"Natalia, what is this?" She started and looked up at him before her lip trembled violently and she put her head down again. He quickly got to his knees and ripped off his coat, draping it across her frail icy shoulders. "What are you doing out here in the rain and next to nothing on? Are you locked out of the castle? Why didn't you have Headmaster Oblonsky walk you home, like I told you to? He would have been happy to do that for you."

"Igor…I …oh…." She sputtered, quite overcome with a new flood of sorrow at the very sight of him. She tried again to articulate a response but nothing intelligible came out and she put her head back down on her knees.

"Natalia, please talk to me." Her current state was frightening him. His mind went in many directions, one of them being, 'who did this to her and how will I avenge it?'

He pulled her close, still on his knees. "It's all right now Kitten, I'm here. You're safe. Shhhh." He stroked her hair until her cries slowed, then took her face in his hands and raised her face so that she had to look at him. Her eyes were puffy from crying, her hair was soaked and matted to her head, and her lips were blue from cold, but he still found her lovely and the familiar vibration in his heart warmed him again. Perhaps it would be enough to warm them both. "Natalia, you know you can trust me. Please tell me what's happened."

Her eyes looked larger than usual when she finally answered him. "They didn't approve of me did they?"

He sighed in resignation, knowing he could not avoid the proverbial elephant in the room. It was time for a serious discussion. "Come with me." He helped her up and led her around to the conservatory where they had spent their first night together nearly six months ago. Time seemed to pass quickly when they were together, but tonight Igor felt miles away from that time.

Mercifully, the conservatory was unlocked and as if it were expecting guests, filled with spring flowers. The heady scent of lilac dominated the room, and the temperature was on the warm side to accommodate the plants. Natalia slowly removed Igor's jacket and handed it back to him. She was now clad only in a very wet tank top that clung effectively to her body revealing the graceful curve of her breasts punctuated by nipples that were still protesting the chill of the rain. His eyes were instinctively drawn toward them and his cock twitched with enthusiasm. 'Down boy,' he thought, 'You will have to wait.'

She noticed him staring and feeling prone and vulnerable, crossed her arms. He stepped toward her and pulled them open. "Please don't ever hide yourself from me Natalia. Don't deny any part of yourself to me, not ever."

She cringed slightly. It sounded like something Lucius would say, and after meeting his father, she despaired that he was not so dissimilar from Lucius as she had once believed.

"Why do you make that face?" His finger fondled the soft underside of her chin, but she pulled it away.

"Is that why you brought me here?" She seemed to steady herself with the crutch of anger, clenching her jaw so the words were tighter. "One more romp before you ship out? That's such a cliché Igor, I'd expected better of you."

He understood that she didn't really mean it. It was merely a defense mechanism that she frequently employed, so he did not allow the situation to escalate and remained logical. "You're talking nonsense," he admonished. I brought you here because you were so distraught you didn't have sense enough to get out of the rain."

"So now I'm nonsensical?"

"Don't pick a fight, Natalia. It's an illogical tactic and not your style."

She forced all the air out of her lungs and breathed in before she began. "You were coming to the castle. I assume it was to see me."

"I was." He nodded, thinking it better to let her lead the conversation.

"To end it?"

"What? No!" His eyes grew wide. It was far worse than he thought and he was more than a little hurt that she would think that of him.

"Look Igor, I know how this story goes. I've always known it would come to this even when you said it wouldn't." She was barely maintaining her cool. "Certainly I'd hoped for better but I understand your situation. Don't worry, I won't make trouble or give you a hard time about it. We can fade out gracefully with our dignity in tact."

"How can you make this assumption about me?" He leaned back on a table and rolled his eyes. "It's like you don't know me."

"Maybe I don't." She snapped back, then seemed to calm herself. "Igor, look, I tried today. I did the best I could but it was quite obvious that I didn't pass muster with your family."

"Oh, bother them." He waved his hand as if to push the memory away.

"No. Don't say that. They're your family."

"Father, well, he's just concerned. He can be quite controlling and probably won't be satisfied with anyone I choose of my own free will."

"So I shouldn't take it personally is what you're saying."

"Yes." He smiled and hoped he was getting somewhere.

"Lovely. You know that doesn't make me feel better." She turned away from him, walked towards the window and stared out.

"You're just like him." He was baiting her just a bit but couldn't help himself. Although the fight was disconcerting, there was something very sexy about the way she argued with him. It seemed to get his blood rushing to his extremities in a very healthy way.

She quickly turned back. "Excuse me?"

"Well at the moment neither of you seem to have enough faith in me to make the proper decisions for myself." It was his turn to examine the view out the window. "Both of you seem to think I'm so weak minded that I'll be easily led astray from my convictions by another's whim."

"I've never thought you weak minded."

He now had her on the defensive and it excited him further. "Then listen to me." He rose and walked slowly across the room to her. He stood mere inches from her but did not take her into his arms though he knew she wanted him to. He wanted her to wait for him, to be as hot for him as he was for her. "I love you Natalia. I don't know how many times I have to tell you that before you finally believe me, but I'll say it as much as you need to hear it. My father's good opinion is important to me yes. I'll admit it. I think in time, as he gets to know you, he will see that I'm right in this matter. But if he doesn't, well it doesn't change how I feel about you."

"Oh," she whined and fell into his arms unable to resist him any longer. He breathed a long sigh of relief while fighting he urge to grind his hips against hers. That would have to wait.

"Natalia, how long had you been out there in the rain?" His tone was paternal for she needed him to care for her and he was more than ready to do so for the rest of his life.

"I don't know."

He kissed the top of her head and stroked her wet hair. "I didn't want to cause you distress, Kitten."

"When you left, I thought we were ending," she sniffed

"No." He kissed the top of her head again and hugged her tighter. "We are just beginning. It's the best time. It is the springtime of my loving."

"I love that song," she sighed. "So where did you go when you left?"

"To buy you a present."

She laughed softly. "A present?"

He pulled away and looked at her very seriously. His eyes looked deep into her's and found what they were looking for, the eternal connection that had grabbed him at their first meeting. On finding it, he was able to draw them together again. He dropped to one knee and took her hand. She smiled softly, reading him accurately.

"Natalia, you are the one that I want. You are the only one I will ever want. I know we are young, and we are not without minor obstacles, but I want you to become part of my family, and I want us to create a new family. I'm asking you for the third time, with a ring." He pulled the ring out of his pocket and held it up for her to see before placing it on her finger. Her hands were shaking. "Natalia, I beg you, with all my heart, with everything I have, to do me the supreme honor of becoming my wife." He bowed his head and kissed her ring finger and remained in that position humbly awaiting her response.

He felt her hand on his head, running her fingers through his tangled mass of waves and he leaned into the sensation, turning his face to kiss the palm of her hand but still not looking up. If he was honest with himself, he was terrified she would refuse him again. "Please say yes," he breathed into her palm, but still she did not respond. He wondered if she was thinking about her response or merely toying with him. The suspense was excruciating, but oddly arousing and he found himself leaning his face against her thighs. "Please, Natalia," he whispered softly. "Please."

Slowly she knelt in front of him equalizing them. She pressed her forehead against his and kissed his nose softly, drawing a weak sigh from him. Her other hand closed around his and she responded, "Yes."

AN: She finally said yes! Poor Igor had to wait long enough but really they SHOULD have to work for it right? Thanks to all who have PM'ed, reviewed, followed or shown the Facebook love for the story. You guys make my day!


	42. Chapter 42 Guess Who's Coming To Dinner

CHAPTER FORTY TWO

Guess Who's Coming to Dinner

"Mother? Father?" Igor eased into the sitting room where his parents sat on the oversized sofa. His mother had several stacks of parchments laid out on the table in front of her and was hovering over them with a concerned look on her face. His father lowered his copy of The Daily Prophet and peered over his rectangular spectacles at his middle son.

"There's my handsome prince," his mother gushed. She smiled adoringly up at him with her round, plain face and extended her plump arm to him. Although mothers were not supposed to have favorites, Igor always felt that he was the one she loved best, but perhaps she made his siblings feel that way too. He didn't dare ask. "I haven't seen you all day son. Come in. I'm just working on the guest list and menu for your party, you know the whole family wants to congratulate you on your graduation and hear all about the tournament. We've planned it for the week you return from your Grand Tour."

"Ah, well I've come at the right time then." Igor was nervous and mumbling. The sound of weakness in his own voice irritated him and he cleared his throat violently.

"Goodness, sit down, sweetheart. What's wrong with your throat? Have you been getting enough rest?" His mother fussed about him, placing her hand on his forehead as she had done since he was a child.

"I'm fine mother." He rumbled while gently pulling her hand away. He looked back to his father who was now scowling at him knowingly. "_Damn that man. He could always read me like an open book," _thought Igor. Well then there was no sense putting off this conversation any longer. "I will need you to add an additional name to your guest list, mother."

"Certainly, darling, you know all your friends are welcome in our home, and who would this be?" She asked while scrutinizing one of the parchments.

"My fiancé." He gulped, looking back at his father hoping against all hope for some show of support which did not come. He had expected nothing else, but was disappointed just the same.

"Your what?" His mother blinked and he noted that her voice was now absent of the kind lilt present when he first entered the room. "I'm sorry. I thought you said fiancé."

"I did."

"Igor, I thought we talked about this," his father began in an annoyingly patronizing tone.

"You knew about this?" His mother snapped over her shoulder and then turned back to her son. She seemed to regret her disagreeable tone and composed her face into more placid lines topped off with a fake smile. "Well," she breathed, seething just below the surface and not hiding it well. "Who is the lucky young lady? Sasha Malfoy?"

"Mother, that was over before it started." Igor rolled his eyes to the ceiling with an exasperated sigh as he leaned back in a chair across from his mother.

"Tell your mother, son." His father nodded.

"Her name is Natalia." He began cautiously.

"Ah Natalia, a Russian girl," his mother cooed. "But I don't recall meeting any Natalia's in our social circle. What is her family name?"

"Smith."

"Smith?" Her upper lip curled in disgust. "Well what kind of a name is Smith?"

"It's English mother. She's an English girl."

"I _know_ it's English, Igor," his mother's jaw was now so tight it affected the sound of her words. It never ceased to amaze him how a woman's mood could change so quickly. "Smith is not a society name, so my assumption is that you have gotten yourself entangled in a rather low association."

"It is not a low association."

"Of course it is. Smith. It's commonplace, one of the many thousands of Smiths with nothing to distinguish her from another. Of all the pureblood witches in Europe you could have claimed for your wife and this is the best you can come up with? Who are her parents?"

"Uhm, she has none."

"What are you talking about? Everyone has parents."

"She doesn't know who they are. She was raised in a muggle orphanage."

The breath left Mrs. Karkaroff entirely and her eyes nearly popped out of the sockets. "Well," she half laughed, half smirked. "This is just wonderful Igor." She leaned back in her seat and rolled her eyes to the ceiling. "Have you told anyone?"

"Just Levin. Mother really, she's a lovely girl, ask father. He met her at the tournament and…"

"What?" Her voice was now shrewish as her head snapped in the direction of her husband.

Igor teetered somewhere between offense and defense and looked foolishly to his father to tip the balance in his favor.

"Excuse me? Alexi, you KNEW about this?"

Mr. Karkaroff began to sputter as his son did and in that moment Igor hated him for it. He was always hammering away at his sons to have backbone, but when it came to his wife, he failed to practice what he preached. "I didn't know Igor asked her to marry him, but she is not completely unfortunate despite her lack of breeding. Vilma, I don't think you should over react…"

"Over react? Why didn't you tell me?"

"I didn't think it was so serious. You know Igor never sticks with a girl and I thought this would all pass once he returned home."

"But we have plans for him. This could ruin everything. He has an opportunity what with his fame and talent. If he marries well it will advance the entire family, not just him."

"Stop talking about me like I'm not in the room!" Igor raised his voice, which seemed to take all three of them by surprise. He was very respectful of his parents and although he would argue, he never took a tone that was anything other than completely respectful.

"Igor," his mother straightened her spine and addressed him in a businesslike tone as she normally did with the house elves. "I've heard enough of this foolishness. Just put this scheme out of your head right now. Your father and I will not allow it."

He lowered his eyes to the floor, devastated that his worries were coming to fruition. "It's not your choice, mother."

"Well, we obviously can't leave it up to you. Look what a debacle this is already."

"Mother." He cut her off. "Father, I know neither of you would choose this for me, but she is a fine witch. She is of excellent character, intelligent and hardworking and I will marry her with or without your blessing." They both gaped at him but did not argue. He felt momentum and let it carry him further. "She is going to join me in my travels about Europe this summer. She will return with me in August and meet the rest of the family at my graduation party and then we will marry prior to the start of my first term. I've asked her to stay here with us for a year while I attend University. Then when she is comfortable with the language, she will enroll."

"Humph, I suppose she managed to get you to pay for her further education as well."

"We have not discussed that but as my wife, if she asks, I will."

"With what? You live under our roof."

"If you reject her, you reject me and we will leave. It's as simple as that. But she will be my wife. I would like your blessing, but if you choose not to give it, my plans will be the same." This discussion was not productive and before they could start in on him again, he wanted to make a hasty retreat. "Now if you will excuse me, I'm going upstairs to pack. I'm leaving first thing in the morning to collect Natalia. She leaves Hogwarts tomorrow."

As he walked up the stairs to his room his hands were shaking and his heart was thumping. His palms were sweating so badly that when he went to turn the doorknob to his room, his grip slipped. He tried again with the same result and finally he had to pull his sleeve down over his hand to get some traction. He entered and then slammed the door behind him. He walked over to the enormous window opposite the door and stared out over the lake and surrounding forest. Several deer had ventured down to the banks and were sipping the cool water. The does reminded him of Natalia and he longed to be with her. He resolved not to elaborate on his parent's reaction. Maybe if his mother and sisters actually met her, they would welcome her. Surely knowing her would be the difference. Right now she was just an intangible and of course his mother would believe the worst. That would change. It must change, for although he would forsake all for her, he did not want to leave his family and hoped it wouldn't come to that.

There was a soft knock at the door, which Igor ignored. However his brother entered without waiting for an invitation and sauntered across the room. Igor looked briefly over his shoulder but upon identifying his visitor, turned away with a frown.

"Why is our mother crying?" Konstantine asked casually while pulling a book off one of Igor's shelves and leafing through it.

"Because she's a neurotic control freak," Igor growled. He knew Konstantine was just as controlling as their mother and never asked a question to which he did not already know the answer.

"You told her about your little fling didn't you?"

Igor turned to face his brother but kept his expression neutral, revealing nothing that did not come from his words. "It's not a fling. We're engaged."

"Hmmm," Konstantine mused raising his eyebrows before putting the book back on the shelf and selecting another. "Well done, Natalia."

"Why do you say that? Are you saying she's got an agenda?" Igor was so ready for a fight. Hitting someone hard until they felt as bad as he, would be enormously satisfying to him. Konstantine had no idea.

"Settle down, I've not come to quarrel with you. I'm sure you know her character better than I. Even you have to admit it will improve her lot."

"And what's wrong with that? I love her. I want to help her improve her lot. That's what you do when you care for someone. It's certainly no worse than what mother wants me to do, marry some rich witch to strengthen our family standing. Funny she doesn't see the irony."

"Does she love you though?"

Igor met his brother's eyes. It was a question asked out of familial devotion, and he hoped he was speaking the truth when he answered. "Yes."

"Why do you think that is?"

"What do you mean why?"

"I mean why? Have you asked yourself that?" The condescension in Konstantine's voice was infuriating.

"What are you insinuating? As if I didn't know," Igor huffed as he crossed his arms over his chest.

"Settle down. You're such a hothead. I'm not insinuating anything, simply giving you something to consider." He shoved the book he was pursuing under his arm as he walked to the door. "Good night."

Igor tried to sleep but rest eluded him for hours. Why did she love him? The question everyone asked that he had no answer too echoed loudly in the depths of his heart. It seemed so real but with so many people he cared about doubting it, he was questioning everything. Only one thing was for certain, the answer would be found in her arms. Tomorrow he would discern her heart's loyalties.

Natalia sat on the stage erected in the Great Hall, nervously tapping her foot. Although she was in the third row of the Slytherin group of seventh years, she disliked being so visible. Mercifully, Snape followed Smith in the order and she was able to sit with her friend during the ceremony. Sadly he wasn't much company, remaining aloof as he had all year since he'd taken up with his little gang of Slytherins and gotten himself branded with that ominous mark.

The Gryffindor seventh years walked across the stage to their seats and out of the corner of her eye, she noticed Severus shooting dirty looks at Black and Potter. Sasha breezed confidently across the stage like she owned it, blonde hair whipping behind her so perfectly that Natalia wondered if she had charmed it to do so. She waved at the crowd and Natalia noticed the Malfoy family sitting front and center, including Lucius and Narcissa. Lucius caught her looking and narrowed his eyes while licking his lips. It was a mannerism she'd witnessed many times before and she knew precisely what he was thinking about, hand jobs. She flushed and then scanned the rest of the crowd before finding Igor leaning seductively against the back wall. It was one of the few times she'd seen him out of Durmstrang robes, when he was still wearing clothes anyway. He wore an ivory turtleneck sweater and low slung jeans with a large silver belt buckle and rips in apparently strategic places. He wore a dark jacket over it all and crossed his arms nonchalantly in front of his chest. When he caught her eye, he raised an eyebrow and gave a half smile, which made her heart flutter ridiculously. He was one sexy beast, and she immediately forgot about Lucius as she focused on giving him a look to equal the seductive qualities of his own. She didn't know if it looked as good as the one he was giving her, but he winked back just the same.

As soon as the speeches and ceremony was finished, Natalia sprinted to the back of the room and leapt into his arms. He embraced her tightly and swung her around before setting her gently down and dominating her lips with his own crushing need. She put up no resistance, melting against him and sighing into his lips. "Ah, Rasputin's robes, I've missed you, Natalia," he murmured against her cheek before planting soft kisses on her earlobe.

"I know. It's only been a week but I thought I'd never get through it." She wrapped her arms tightly around him and nuzzled into his chest.

He collected her face in his hands and stooped to her eye level. "We'll never be apart again, Kitten. From this point forward, you are stuck with me and I am going to treat you like a queen."

Natalia's smile spread from one ear to the other. "That sounds like pure heaven, Igor." It was like a dream, and she couldn't wait to begin her life with this wonderful man. It was almost too good to be true.

"Oh it will be. Count on it." His lips found hers again while his hands glided from her cheeks back into her hair and he pulled her hard into his kiss. "You are so mine."

She surrendered for a moment, but then pushed him gently off. "That I am, but this is a borderline pornography."

"Uh, Merlin, don't talk about pornography or I'll shove you in the broom closet and trakhat'sja you till you can't walk." Igor breathed heavily as he lapsed in and out of Russian. He had only one thing on his mind and he didn't give a damn who saw or heard it. "

"Trakha—what?"

His lips grazed against hers teasingly and he leered at her with heavily lidded eyes. "I think you know exactly what I'm talking about."

"Less talking…more action, Mr. Karkaroff."

He exhaled and his chest rattled making him sound like a lion growling. He made a pretext of standing up and looking across the Great Hall. "Do you have some people you want to say goodbye to?"

Natalia didn't bother to look, for he knew the answer, "No."

Igor grinned mischievously and led her by the hand into the courtyard. As he led them out the door, he grabbed his broomstick that he'd left leaning beside the door and then seemed to remember something. He turned quickly, "Oh, ah, did you need to get anything from your dorm?"

Natalia reached into the deep pocket of her robe and pulled out a small purse. "Packed, reduced and ready to roll."

"Prepared. I like that." He smiled. "So are you ready to come with me on this Grand Tour?"

"Yes. Where are we going first?"

"London."

She laughed. "Some grand tour, that's my hometown."

He leaned in and kissed her behind one ear, causing her to shiver. "It's closest." Then he kissed her behind the other ear. "So we can get there quickly." He trailed kisses and grazed his scruff along her jawline. "And the quicker we get there," he paused to kiss her lips softly. "The quicker I can have my way with you."

Natalia was breathing hard, her lungs taking up too much space in her chest. "I've always found that to be the most fascinating city in the world."

Igor laughed loudly and mounted his broom. He led her around and put him in front of her so he could surround her on the flight to London. "Hold tight, Kitten. I'm going to take you on the ride of a lifetime." He pushed off and they quickly made their assent.

They were so engrossed in each other that neither noticed the blonde wizard that was watching from a distance. Lucius observed the scene with great sorrow in his heart. Natalia was lost to him forever it seemed. With a deep sigh of regret he turned back toward the Great Hall to rejoin his family and his icy fiancé.

After a long windy flight, they landed in London in a section of town Natalia had never been in before. From the looks of people, it was definitely a magical area, but it was not Diagon Alley. The buildings were much larger, white marble and opulent. "Where are we, Igor?"

"O'Kent Square of course. Have you never been here?"

"No. I've heard of some of my housemates coming here, but I've never been here. It's a rather exclusive section of the wizarding world."

Igor snickered, "Well you didn't think I'd be dragging you around to hostels or camping out did you?"

"Actually, that's exactly what I thought."

"And you still came with me?" He looked at her puzzled and trying to determine if she was sincere or merely posturing. His family's nagging had taken its toll.

"Well of course I did. Igor I'd live in a cardboard box if I could still be with you."

He breathed a sigh of relief. "Well, I assure you there are no boxes for you to endure this trip, only the best hotels, the finest restaurants, the rarest libations and the most beautiful witch."

"You're too good to me, Igor."

"Get used to it. Come on."

There was no real check in procedure. Igor merely waved his wand over a crystal formation and a key materialized. He grabbed it and led her by the hand to the elevator and then to their room. When they arrived at the door to their room Igor unlocked it without a word, pushed it and held it open, motioning her inward before him. He hoped his nerves weren't obvious to her for he would loath to appear anything but confident and in complete control in front to her. He was ashamed of how often she uncovered his insecurities and at the moment they were just below the surface. She could reveal them with a glance if she chose to.

Her eyes widened as she entered the suite. He would have been impressed as well had he been able to relax enough to enter. They were on the top floor with an unparalleled view of the city. Although Igor hadn't booked anything other than a regular room, when the staff learned they would be hosting the Tri-Wizard Champion, they upgraded their accommodations. The walls were a dark blue that complimented the evening sky. The furnishings were dark cherry, ornately carved antiques. Brass and crystal accents were the finishing touches.

"Oh my word, Igor," Natalia gasped as she looked about the room. First she went to the window and looked out, then she turned and observed the sitting area before her eyes found the entrance to the bedroom and the huge bed with heavy curtain canopies. "This room is incredible."

He relaxed a bit and smiled nervously. "Do you like it?" Once again he cursed the weakness in his voice and cleared his throat.

"What's not to like? But really this must have cost a fortune."

He frowned at the mention of cost, but at least she was on what he considered the right side of the issue. She could be posturing. It was maddening not to know. He knew only one thing for certain. He wanted her in his bed. Dark eyes met their match and the heat between them spread to his groin. His gaze turned black as night, boring into her eyes as he crossed the room. He violently ripped off his jacket and tossed it aside without care before he embraced her.

His lips crushed hers with a vengeance while he pulled her body hard against his own and fisted his hand through her hair, guiding her lips exactly as he wanted them. Immediately she bent to his will, arching her back and nearly going limp except for her hands, which caressed his chest. She whimpered into his mouth as she melted against him. The transfer of energy sent heat to all the right places in his body. At that point he didn't care what anyone thought of them. He wanted her desperately, completely, and repeatedly. Tonight there would be no interruptions, no dashing off to make curfew, no trying to be quiet so they don't get caught. Tonight he could unleash his passion and love her as he wanted. "Mmm, I want you, Kitten."

"Want, you, too," she breathed nearly incoherent with desire. Her obvious need spurred him on and he picked her up off her feet and carried her to the bed. He set her down gently and then murmured a vanishing spell so that their clothes were gone.

"Whoa," she breathed with a half smile. "A little anxious?" She welcomed him on top of her. "No foreplay tonight?"

"I need to be inside you." He held her gaze without thought to how abrupt he sounded. "You have no idea how much I need you. A week is far too long to be apart. Uhhh Rasputin…please baby, I need you so bad."

"I need you too. Take me, oh please." She caressed his backside and pulled him closer.

Igor growled at the sensation before sheathing himself inside her. The heat of her sex was intoxicating and a tremor shook his body, which was audible in his ragged groan. This was what he needed, to feed this addiction and nothing else existed.

"Yes," she moaned arching her back and providing him with a spectacular view of her breasts. Her nipples were erect and luring his mouth to engulf them which he did, allowing his tongue to languish about each of them before finishing off with a playful rolling nibble between his teeth. "Ah, oh God," she tensed before immediately relaxing in his still iron grip about her body. "So good," she moaned which only encouraged him to do it again, this time keeping a closer eye on how her body reacted to this mildly sadistic manipulation. All the while he continued sliding slowly out of her and then deeper inside with each thrust. No matter how deep he got, it wasn't enough and he soon realized he was pushing her all about the bed and their heads were now at the foot.

"Harder, Igor, deeper," she moaned and he obliged by guiding first one leg and then the other over his shoulder, giving him not only the deepest access, but also the added sensation of his balls pressing against her with each grind. "Yes, right there," she moaned. He growled in response bucking firmly against her and nuzzling his scruff against her calf. Her legs were smooth as silk and she smelled incredibly of lavender. He wondered if she tasted like lavender too and without thinking licked the inside of her calf, which tasted as good as it smelled. "Ahhhh," she whimpered again increasing his hunger so that he bit gently down on the flesh of her calf and rolled it between his teeth as he had done with her nipples. "Ahhh," Natalia all at once, screamed loudly, raked her nails across his back and succumbed to her orgasm. Her walls clenched tightly around him and without warning he came hard, shooting his seed deep inside her and tensing his entire body.

Natalia tensed in his arms, then convulsed slightly, then tensed again as she held him tightly. He fell on top of her, releasing her legs, which fell limply back onto the bed. They lay there, seared together by the sweat of their stomachs and the perfect synchronization of their breath.

Igor lay motionless for sometime trying to name the emotion he felt in that moment. It was love certainly but the underlying current was something he could only identify as gratitude, for he was terribly grateful to be back in her arms, this time for good. He was thrilled to have the next several weeks with nothing to do but travel from one exotic local to the next and ravish this beautiful witch at each new destination. He pulled up on his elbows and looked into her eyes. For a moment he was afraid he might shed an unmasculine tear, but then he gulped, choking it back. "I love you so much, Natalia. You have no idea. You've changed my life."

"You've changed mine too, Igor."

He tensed a bit, wondering what she meant by that? Was it the money as everyone said? That was certainly a change. Her statement concerned him considering their local and the anti-Natalia sentiments he'd had to deal with as of late.

It was if she could read his mind. "Hey," she pushed his hair back behind his ears out of his face. "What's wrong, your whole face just changed."

This witch owned him. The very thought terrified him and for a moment, he could not respond. But he had to know, rather he had to be constantly reassured. His personality was the needy type even if he did keep it well hidden from the world. "Do you love me? I mean really love me?"

"How can you doubt that?"

"Just answer me…honestly. Do you love me?"

"Yes. Yes, Igor I love you with all my heart. But you don't ask that unless you aren't sure of my answer. What can I do to make sure you know this?" She stroked his hair lovingly as he bent towards her touch.

He kissed her gently as an act of reverent devotion. "Tell me everyday."

"That's easy."

"Promise me if we disagree, you won't leave. That you'll stay and we'll work it out. I don't want to live in fear of abandonment."

She looked at him quizzically. She knew him well and it was obvious that she recognized something deeper going on inside him, but she did not press him. "I am always rational…well mostly anyway and I would never abandon you."

"And always be honest with me." He could have sworn he saw a shadow cross her face but it was nearly imperceptible and gone in an instant. "Can you promise me that? No lies of commission or omission. Always tell me everything so I know I can trust you."

"Yes, Igor. Can I trust you as well?"

"Implicitly."


	43. Chapter 43 Around the World

CHAPTER FORTY-THREE

Natalia entered the hotel carrying a tray of coffee and sweets for she and Igor. He had been deliciously relentless on her the night before, and so when she awoke and found him still snoozing peacefully, she let him be. The sun was making a rare appearance and she felt uncharacteristically free, and wanted to bask in both. It was the first time in a very long time that she had nothing to do for school or work. It was a strange feeling that made her a little jumpy and she felt a strong desire to assign herself to a task. So she quietly dressed and crept out of the room and in search of someplace to buy them a little breakfast. As she walked back in to the hotel, several people eyed her and she had a creepy feeling that they knew she'd been having relations outside of marriage in her room with Igor. Years later she would roll her eyes when she recalled her girlish notions, but for now they worried her and she hurried back to her room.

She tried to balance the coffee and sweets carefully while unlocking the door and attempting to open it with one hand. She'd barely moved the knob a quarter turn when it was flung open and Igor stood before her with wild eyes, shirtless, in the jeans he wore yesterday with the top button unfastened. He was breathing hard and gazed longingly at her for a moment before gracefully relieving her of the tray with one hand and pulling her tight against him with the other. "Thank the heavens," he breathed in heavily accented English, his accent always seeming more pronounced when he became emotional.

"What's the matter, Igor?" Natalia mumbled, nearly suffocated against his chest.

"Where WERE you?" His tone changed erratically and was now becoming demanding.

"I just went to get us a little breakfast." She wiggled free of his grasp. "I didn't know I was under house arrest."

He flinched at her jibe and she noticed his jaw tighten under his scruff. "You didn't tell me you were going out. What was I supposed to think?"

Natalia was more than a little annoyed at his childish antics and arched her eyebrows while snatching the tray away from him and taking it to the table by the large window overlooking the town. "That I'm a big girl and can take care of myself. That I probably just stepped out for a moment to do something nice for you." She continued enumerating thoughts he should be thinking as she removed cups from the tray and slammed them on the table. "That you should just roll over and go back to sleep instead of acting like a mother hen."

Igor opened his mouth to respond, but then seemed to think better of it and closed it. Natalia unpacked the rest of their breakfast and set it out on the table with paper napkins then handed his coffee cup to him. He accepted without a word and took a noisy slurp, then examined the cup.

"To your liking, Mr. Karkaroff?" Natalia snapped at him while she ripped open the bag of scones and handed him one. She did not take one for herself, as her appetite had vanished. Rather she enjoyed a sip of her coffee.

"It's very good," Igor said sheepishly. He ran his tongue across his teeth, finishing with a click that told her he was stalling in order to choose his words carefully. She allowed him a little space but began to dread the silence that seemed to be growing between them. He took a huge, childishly obnoxious bite of the scone and began to chew. Natalia rolled her eyes and slouched in the chair next to their table with an exasperated sigh. "Scones are good too," he garbled, barely understandable with a mouth full of food. Natalia grunted in response, her gaze was fixated out the window as she took another long sip from her coffee. From time to time she glanced at him devouring the scone and snarled at his abominable table manners, which were apparently a byproduct of many years at an all boys school.

Several minutes seemed to pass before Igor spoke again. "I'm sorry, Natalia." She looked at him but remained silent, wanting a little bit more than what he was currently offering. "It's just that when I woke up and you weren't there, it scared me. After our conversation last night…well…I don't know. You probably think I'm incredibly foolish right now don't you?"

"Oi, you said it," she cracked.

Igor laughed softly. "Brutally honest as always. Natalia, it's just that this is a big city and…"

"It's my hometown you daft dunkoff." She attempted to narrow her eyes but the corner of her mouth betrayed a smile.

He giggled,"Daft dunkoff, nice try to blend our cultures but I think dunkoff is German or something."

"Whatever." She waved her hand and turned her face away before she started to laugh.

"Let me try again." He walked in front of her, blocking her view of the city and stooped until they were at eye level. "Please forgive my impetuous behavior Miss Smith. I was carried away by my feelings for you. I love you and I want to protect you. Any city is filled with lowlifes that might harm a pretty young girl even if it is her hometown. I can't help worry about you. I will try not to over react but sadly it is in my nature and tough to control. Please pity me for my terrible disposition and remember next time that I would find it just as lovely if you just ordered room service and then came back to bed with me." He raised his chin a bit when he finished and she suspected he was proud of his answer. He was very persuasive and she had no intention of staying mad at him.

"Forgiven," she purred with a wry smile before sipping her coffee once again and pretending to be aloof. She couldn't let him off the hook too easy.

Igor leaned over and kissed her playfully on the nose. "So what does my Kitten want to do today?" He relieved her of her coffee cup and plopped it down on the table so he had room to rest his head against hers.

Natalia responded with a wry smile before pushing his shoulders until he toppled backwards. He managed to pull her with him so she landed on top of him with a giggle. Her lips parted, met his and she kissed him without reserve while weaving her hands through his tousled morning hair. Igor wound his arms around her while his legs deftly entangled with hers so he was still in control despite his earlier disadvantage. She wantonly ground her hips against his until he began to groan with need beneath her. He attempted to roll them over but she quickly removed her hands from his hair and gently pinned his wrists just above his shoulders.

"Oooh Kitten, you do love to keep me in line don't you?" He breathed with a mischievous smile.

"It's a dirty job, but someone has to do it," she murmured while kissing him just below his earlobe. "You asked me what I wanted to do today, well I think this is it."

"Uhh, Rasputin. I have found the perfect witch," he mused and relaxed under her attentions. The coffee went cold, the scones got stale, but Igor and Natalia had everything they needed in that moment.

After three days in the swanky London suite, which might have been located in any number of nondescript neighborhoods for they never stepped foot out of the room, they travelled on to France. Igor had always detested the country. While he admired the beauty of the landscape, the delectable food, and the frequently morally casual attitude of many of the young witches, it was all in such contrast to who he was. Despite how his mother, aunties and sisters had labored with him, he was a hearty, outdoorsy type that needed constant physical activity and he found the slower pace confining. He did however have an appreciation of the arts in the city of Paris. Natalia had never been out of the country so when he showed her around the town and pointed out various landmarks, she was appropriately impressed. This emboldened him and gave him something to focus on; impressing her so she would want to have more sex.

By the end of the second day of which was to be a five day stay, he began to wish he hadn't planned this stopover to be so lengthy. Luckily an owl arrived that morning from Levin. He and Fiona were on holiday together on an island off the coast of Monaco, and asking Igor and Natalia to join them. The island had a hedonistic reputation and catered to young wizarding elite, a very self-indulgent crowd. Igor was ready for some action so to him it sounded like a welcome change, but as reserved as Natalia was, he wondered if she would reject the idea. He needn't have worried. Natalia knew he was becoming bored with Paris, and merely toughing it out for her sake. So despite cringing on the inside, on the outside she responded, "That sounds like fun!"

The moment the apparated, to the island, they were greeted by tall sinewy witches in snug white sundresses with fruity cocktails and sleek looking overly attentive witches who showed them to their bungalow right on the shoreline close to the beach club. Natalia felt immediately out of place in such a place. For one thing the sun was bright and blazing and everyone seemed to wear minimal clothing. She was a very British girl and the beach atmosphere was a self-esteem wrecking culture shock. Igor by contrast seemed perfectly at home. He immediately changed into swim trunks and was ready to go meet Levin, but she stalled by unpacking.

"Come on," he groaned like a child. "Let's do that later. It's beautiful outside."

Natalia opened her bag and rummaged for the one and only swimsuit she owned. It was a standard requirement for Hogwarts witches that they wore on the rare occasion that they might swim in the Black Lake. The matronly looking faded black one-piece was depressing to look at and considering Natalia was pasty white as a proper British witch would be, the effect would be disastrous. She was so busy fretting about how she would look next to the other witches that she didn't hear him come up behind her.

"Get your suit on, Kitten." He smacked her bum playfully, causing her to jump. "Let's go!"

"Oh, ah, you go ahead." She stammered. "I'll unpack us and then come down."

He noticed the swimsuit in her hand. "Surely you're not getting modest on me." He curled his arms around her waist and rested his head on her shoulder. "Are you forgetting I've seen you naked from the most interesting angles?"

"Oh, no. Really, I just want to get us organized. Then I'll be down."

He was disappointed but relented. "Okay. Don't be too long though."

He left her and she busied herself unpacking them. Unfortunately, they both travelled light and that task didn't occupy her nearly as long as she had hoped. Reluctantly, she put the bathing suit on and examined herself in the mirror. While she never thought of herself as a raving beauty, she thought that she was at least passable compared with her fellow students when they were all in the same suits. But the witches she passed on the way in were long legged with savage tans and sleek hair and make up. Next to them she thought she would look like someone's Nana.

There was a knock at the door, which she assumed was Igor. Had she been preening that long? The moment she opened the door she was bear hugged by a squealing Sasha Malfoy. "Naaaaaat! I'm so glad you're here! I saw Igor at the beach club and he said you were in here mucking about with unpacking. He sent me to hurry you up."

Natalia took one look at her friend who was decked out it a low-slung black bikini that hugged her hips to perfection and kept her breasts perched perfectly. A sheer deep purple sarong tied at her waist masqueraded as a cover-up, but covered nothing. Her blond hair was pulled into a smooth knot and large dark glasses rested on top of her head. It was too depressing for words.

"Good to see you Sasha, but I'm a little tired. I think I'll just rest here before dinner."

"Merlin's nightgown, are you wearing that?" Sasha raised her eyebrows at Natalia's swimwear. "Blimey, I burned mine."

Natalia blushed at her frankness. Sasha, while well meaning, seemed to be lacking the infamous filter. "It's the only one I have." Natalia mumbled, feeling much like she had when they went to the Yule Ball.

"Uh! You so need me." The younger Malfoy tossed her beach bag on the sofa as she pushed her way into the room. She removed her wand, faced Natalia and pointed it at her.

Natalia jumped back, putting her hands up in a defensive posture. "What are you going to do?"

"Oh for Merlin's sake I'm not going to hurt you. Let me transfigure that bathing suit into something from this century please. You absolutely cannot go out like that. You're Igor Karkaroff's fiancé."

Natalia narrowed her eyes for it always annoyed her that her only identity in other people's eyes was "Igor's girlfriend," or "Igor's fiancé" and she was not acknowledged in her own right. However it wasn't a role she disliked and Sasha certainly hadn't thought out her comment to that extent, her lack of filter striking again. So Natalia relented, "All right, but nothing too skimpy."

"Oh Nat, you've got a nice body, why do you always act like you're ashamed of it, shlumping around in baggy clothes all the time?"

Natalia deciding against informing her that her sleazy brother was to blame. "I'd prefer a one piece if you don't mind. I don't think Igor would want me to reveal too much."

"Whatever." Sasha rolled her eyes and then focused on Natalia. "Cotourus!" She commanded with authority and Natalia felt the material sliding across her midsection, bum and other regions she tried not to think about. The sensation tickled her and she giggled a bit before the movement stopped. Sasha walked around her eyeing her up and down. "Not bad, I must say. Check yourself out."

Natalia made her way to the full-length mirror and was surprised at what she saw. Sasha kept her word and left it as a once piece but it was now a deep eggplant color that hugged her skin. The legs were cut higher, there was a semblance of a belt around her waist with silver buckle, and the neckline plunged nearly to her navel. She turned around and saw that the back was very low as well. It was sexy but did not reveal all and she knew her wizard would approve. She smiled, feeling better already but as she assessed herself, she still didn't feel quite put together.

Sasha dug into her bag of tricks once again and after rustling about a bit, handed Natalia a vial of potion.

"What's this?"

"Tanning potion my pasty friend. Drink up and get rid of your Brit identification tag." Sasha laughed.

Natalia did as she was told and soon her skin turned a sun kissed brown which seemed to hide a few flaws and make her look better in the suit.

Sasha dug in the bag again, found a scarf and transfigured it into a matching eggplant wrap dress. Then she presumptuously made her way to their closet and pulled out one of Igor's fur hats. "Well he won't be needing this for a while." She transfigured it into a black, wide brimmed sun hat and tossed it at Natalia, then rummaged some more and found a pair of flat shoes which she transfigured into a pair of wedge sandals. "Put these on." She tossed it at Natalia and then dug once more in her bag to dig out a pair of oversized black sunglasses. She put them on Natalia then stood back to admire her work. "As I said…'you need me,'" Sasha laughed.

Natalia finished accessorizing and breathed a sigh of relief. This was the one Malfoy she did like having around. "Thank you, Sasha. At least I won't feel out of place now." Natalia took a few more moments to marvel at the change in the mirror. Normally she felt terribly plain, but at the moment, she liked what she saw.

"No time to be vain." Sasha yanked her away from the mirror by her hand. "Come on, the beach club is calling."

Natalia held her chin high as she walked past the other guests toward the beach club. She almost felt as if she was playing a role, wearing a costume and when she caught sight of herself in a glass door, she barely recognized herself. Igor stretched out on a chaise off in the distance basking in the sun with a drink in his hand with Levin and a svelte looking Fiona decked out in the latest French bikini. Regulus was also there along with the Lestrange brothers and a few others she didn't know. As they drew closer the boys looked in their direction and Sasha waved to them. Igor wrinkled his forehead quizzically and cocked his head to one side when he saw them.

"Ha, look! He doesn't recognize you," Sasha giggled. "Let's have some fun."

Natalia enjoyed the conspiratorial plotting and liked the thought of playing a harmless prank on Igor who was so normally full of pranks to play on everyone else. "Okay." Natalia whispered.

"Hello gentlemen," Sasha gushed her greeting. "I'm sorry, Igor, I couldn't find Natalia. She must have stepped out."

Natalia peered out of her dark glasses at Fiona who winked back and tried to stifle a smile.

"Nice try, Sasha, but I would know this witch anywhere." Igor rose and snaked his arm around her waist. "You look beautiful as always," he whispered lovingly in her ear.

"Oh darn, I thought I could fool you," Natalia laughed. Laughter came easily to her these days and to her surprise, more frequently. Igor was skilled in bringing that out in her.

"I've memorized every inch of that body so don't expect a silly tanning potion to throw me off." He whispered into her ear again. "May I relieve you of that wrap? A body as stunning as yours deserves to be admired…by me of course." He did not wait for an answer but untied the side of the dress and let it slide off her shoulders. Unabashedly he began caressing her arms until Levin interrupted them.

"Get a room will you?" He tossed a towel at Igor.

But his heckling was barely acknowledged. "I have a room," Igor mumbled while nuzzling her hair. "Come on; let's take a walk by the sea." Taking her hand he led her away from the group who was making catcalls and glib commentary.

"Natalia," he began as they walked along the shoreline. "Levin and Regulus have invited me out for a boy's night."

"Boy's night?" She was glad she had sunglasses on so he couldn't see her eyes for this conversation.

"Ah, yes."

"And what does that involve?" She asked archly while keeping her gaze focused on her feet as they walked in the wet sand.

"Nothing terribly outlandish. I think just dinner and cigars and the usual bullshit."

They walked along in silence for a few moments. Natalia wasn't sure she wanted him entangled with the Lestrange brothers who were sure to tag along. "Is it something you feel strongly about? Do you want to go?"

"Not if you don't want me to." The shrug of his shoulders was designed to give the impression that it didn't matter but Natalia knew him better. "It's just that I haven't seen Regulus or Levin in some time. You don't mind do you? Because if you do…"

Natalia cut him off. "It's fine, Igor. I'll see if Sasha and Fiona want to have dinner with me. It will be good for us to catch up too."

Igor smiled. "Thank you."

Dinner with the boys ran late as they had to have four rounds of drinks before ordering. The tall tales were getting taller by the moment particularly with the late addition of the Lestrange brothers and after the first two rounds, Lucius Malfoy. As distasteful as this man's company was, Igor resolved to be the bigger wizard. After all, he had won Natalia and had no reason, or so he thought, to be anything but gracious. They were all aristocrats and would be running in the same social circles for years to come. By the time dinner and several bottles of wine were consumed they were reeling drunk and Rodolphus began to talk politics. Igor knew that the combination of alcohol and the subject matter were dangerous among this lot, but he loved a good argument and couldn't resist diving into the fray despite Levin's admonishments.

"This vulgar inbreeding with muggles, the watering down of our race, it will be the end of us. It must be stopped." Rodolphus roared and took a large gulp of rum.

"How do you stop love? You can't Rodolphus!" Igor leaned back in his chair as he waxed poetic like a hippie. "You sound like a bitter old man when you ramble that way." Levin snickered, as did Regulus, but the others seemed firmly in his opponent's camp

"The devil you can't." The other Lestrange brother piped up. "For one thing, we should not allow them in our schools. You can be proud that Durmstrang has higher standards but what is happening at Hogwarts is positively shameful. My grandfather must be rolling in his tomb at the lack of standards."

"I don't think it's Hogwart's lack of standards that he's rolling about over," Igor cracked and the table erupted with laughter knowing damned well he was referring to Rodolphus' new bride Bella's notorious lack of moral standards. Rodolphus stared icily at him until their companions fell into an uncomfortable silence. When the last smattering of jeers finally died off his eyes bored into Igor's.

"Join us." Rodolphus bared his crooked teeth at Igor, looking remarkably like a Rottwieller.

"Phfft!" With a roll of his eyes, Igor rose pulled several galleon out of his pocket and tossed them on the table. "That, my friend will never happen."

"Don't be so certain. Why close yourself off to this opportunity, and make no mistake it is an opportunity."

"Because I have too much to live for." Igor smiled pointedly at

Lucius, who surprisingly had kept his mouth shut during the exchange. Igor nodded at Levin and they left the group together.

The moment they were gone, at figure emerged from a shadowy corner of the room, the same specter that polluted the box at world cup orchestrating the rape of Natalia. The remaining wizards bowed their head at his entrance, waiting in silence.

"I want that one," his gravelly voice hissed. "Lucius, I charge you with that. I want him in our ranks. He is well known, a hero, handsome and persuasive…like us." His sycophant followers snickered tentatively the way one does when they aren't sure if a laugh is appropriate.

"H-he seems adamantly against in, My Lord," Lucius stuttered his response, seemingly trying to collect all his courage.

"Ah, yes, 'too much to live for'. Then make it your business to see to it that he has less to live for. A man pushed into a corner is easily manipulated. Oh I don't think we can use him for any real tactical missions, but he can help us recruit as long as we don't crush his spirit…too badly. Can you handle it Lucius? You did such a beautiful job last time."

"I can, My Lord. Leave it to me."

Igor and Levin walked in silence back to their bungalows, which were right beside each other. "Levin, do you think there's anything to all that?"

"Of course not. What's the matter with you? You're drunker than I thought, mate."

"I guess so."

They parted ways. Igor entered his cozy bungalow to find Natalia curled up asleep on the chair, with a book on her chest and he smiled at her. He walked over to the dresser and removed his watch and placed it in Natalia's jewelry box she had on the top of it. When he opened it, he noticed a jade necklace with two fighting dragons on it. He'd never seen her wear it and found it odd. It was gaudy and not like her taste at all.

"Oh, you're home." Came her sleepy voice from the chair. "What time is it?"

Igor picked his watch back up and looked at the time. "Two."

"Oh my, you tied on a good one. Did you have fun?"

Igor shrugged. "How come you never wear this necklace?" He held up the piece.

"Oh," she seemed to flinch before responding, "It's ugly."

"Why'd you buy it?"

"It was a gift."

"From who?"

"Sasha."

"Sasha buys you jewelry?"

"I think she went on holiday."

"If you don't' like it why don't you get rid of it?"

"I was afraid she'd ask me about it and then if I didn't have it she might get offended. It's just silly girls stuff." She stood up and approached him, pulling her nightgown over her head as she went. Igor knew it was merely a distraction but he was too intoxicated to resist. When she kissed her way down his chest and stomach it was plainly a diversionary tactic. By the time she had her mouth around him and his orgasm oozed down the back of her throat, he knew she was lying. But he chose not to care.

_AN: Hope you all liked this installment I mean who hasn't felt like a shrinking violet when faced with the dreaded bathing suit hell? Please let me know your thoughts as I'd love some precious feedback. Spoiler alert….I only have about one more chapter of nice in me before all hell breaks loose. Yeeeeaaaah! _

_Shout out to my most wonderful new beta Ella for the fabulous work she does for me! And another shout out to "New Fan" who reviewed so sweetly last chapter, but I was unable to respond! _

_Hope everyone has been enjoying the Olympics! So happy for Michael Phelps and all the athletes who have achieved so much. Now on to important stuff…NFL pre-season!_


	44. Chapter 44 From Russia With Love

CHAPTER FORTY-FOUR

From Russia With Love

The train to the wizarding village just outside St. Petersburg covered far more distance than the Hogwarts express but in almost the same amount of time. Though apparition would have brought them instantly to their destination Igor felt they needed some time alone, for he had much weighing on his mind. The trip to the island had been a fiasco. Though he loved the sea from the time he was a small boy, it was painfully obvious that Natalia did not and that was just one more difference in a growing list of differences. The length of this list was vexing to Igor who was being worn down by the combination of their dissimilarities and the nagging worry that his family would be unaccepting or worse yet, unkind to her.

The conversation after dinner the previous night was also a matter of great concern. He suspected the Death Eaters were not going to just let him gracefully decline their invitation, but would instead continue to persuade him from different angles until they were successful. He thought it was best to put as much distance as possible between him and them and even better to be under the protection of his family and their connections. But it served to worry him all the more that his family would not embrace Natalia as one of their own. If they turned her out, he would follow without hesitation and then they would be in great danger.

He kept all of this from her, feeling that in this case ignorance was bliss. She worried about his family every bit as much as he despite his empty reassurances. If he burdened her with this latest development she as sure to be a basket case, and he wanted her calm when they arrived home. He nuzzled her hair and kissed the top of her head as she napped on his shoulder. Then he looked out the window watching the comfortingly familiar Russian countryside pass by.

It was no surprise that she was exhausted today for they hadn't gone to sleep until well after dawn. As always, when he was tense, his sexual appetite was ravenous. After her long and luxurious blow job he'd returned the oral favor licking hungrily at her sex as if it were a quickly melting gelato. It was a new sexual frontier for her and though she was initially shy and resistant, he insisted, refusing to be denied any part of her. When she gently tried to move his head away before he could dive into her, he'd grabbed her wrists forcefully. "I own you, Natalia. You're free to go of course but when you're in my bed, I own you, and I won't be denied. Say yes," he demanded while his hot breath warmed her sex.

"Yes," she moaned, dropping her head back on the pillow and submitting while arching her back. He knew she would have agreed to anything in that moment and situation. He had an unfair advantage but he loved the control that had been so elusive as of late. So he capitalized on the advantage and improved his position, which at the moment was between her thighs.

"Don't resist me again. I'll have you as I please and you WILL enjoy it, Natalia. I'll make sure of that." He made good on his promise and soon she was wrapping her thighs around neck and fisting her hands in his hair while surging against his mouth. He thought the entire scene was like something out of erotic book and soon found himself squirming under his own throbbing erection as the delicious taste of her drove him to frustrating heights of madness. When she came, she came hard, holding his mouth greedily against her and screaming his name through it all as he'd long ago told her he adored.

He climbed on top of her while she was still panting and delirious. "I love you, Igor," she breathed before kissing his lips still glistening with her dew. He consumed her with a deep sensuous kiss that left nothing untouched as he guided her hand to his throbbing member.

"I need you again. I need to fuck you now."

"Yes, take me again, however you wish."

He growled and flipped her over pulling her hips up higher as he came to his knees.

Igor paused at this point in his musings to recall the exact look and feel of her ass accentuated by fresh tan lines. He gazed out the train window at the pristine countryside, but it could not compare, and so he closed his eyes again to remember her bum and warm caress of her core as he slid into it from behind. He smiled as he recalled how she'd been so eager to please him, and he just as desperate to thrill her. When they were together like that, they both knew this was eternal. It was the external forces he feared and more and more he found himself guarding against them.

She was sleeping so peacefully that he was loath to disturb her, but they arrived at their stop and so he gently coaxed her awake with a kiss. "We're home, Kitten."

She smiled blissfully up at him. "I've never really had a home before. Not with someone I love anyway."

"Well you have one now. Come. It's a couple miles walk but it's a beautiful day and the weather is perfect. It will help is wake up a bit."

As they strolled along Igor pointed out various landmarks and who lived in each house they passed. He'd never really thought much about it, but sharing this with her was a source of pride. He was showing her his world and she was impressed. As they rounded the bottom of a low hill, his grand family home came in to view.

"Wow," she remarked. "Who lives in that monstrosity?"

Igor couldn't help but laugh, for his father frequently used that word to describe it. The scale and embellishments were purely his mother's influence. "You do, my dear."

Natalia stared at the enormous mansion and immediately began to feel knots in her stomach. His home was far larger than Malfoy Manor, but more rustic in style, which was in keeping with the country. She knew his family was well off, but they had never discussed the degree of his wealth and the sight of the massive structure took her by surprise. Her feet stopped moving while she stood gaping. Igor didn't notice at first and kept walking.

"Stop!" Natalia blurted with her feet rooted to the ground.

Igor turned in surprise, with a mildly amused grin. "What's the matter?"

Natalia sputtered. "You didn't tell me you were this rich."

Igor narrowed his eyes at yet another reference to money. "I don't recall you requesting financial statements."

"But…But…this is too much." She shook her head as if to clear it. "It's too much for me. I don't belong here."

He rolled his eyes but approached her gently. "Don't start. You belong with me."

"But this...this just isn't me," she cried.

"It's part of me, Kitten. I can't change my background any more than you can change yours. Come on, we both become a part of each other's lives now. Come on. I'm right here. Don't be scared."

She sighed and squared her shoulders. There was no putting it off any longer.

He led her by the hand to the front door. He entered without knocking and was quickly greeted by a gruff, hairy bearded house elf.

"Good evening, Master Igor."

"Halloo, Pedja." Igor greeted him with a smile that warmed Natalia's heart. He treated him as a friend not a servant and she began to feel a little better. "I'd like to present to you Natalia Smith, my fiancé."

The little elf eyed her carefully and smiled in keeping with propriety. "Welcome to the House of Karkaroff, Miss Smith, and congratulations to you both. Your parents and siblings are just about to sit down to dinner in the dining room."

"Thank you, Pedja. Come with me, Kitten."

He took her by the hand and dragged her into the dining room. The first thing she noticed was an oversized crystal chandelier suspended over the very long dinner table. The table was set with the finest hand painted china she had ever seen and the most dazzling silver and crystal place settings. She counted at least four different forks at each setting. Seven years of life in Slytherin made her well educated in what fork to use but the scene was still quite intimidating.

Seated on the long sides of the table were presumably Igor's siblings, his older brother Konstantin and a younger brother and an older and two younger sisters. Konstantin scowled at her and his expression matched the dour expression of the woman that was presumably his mother. She was plump and a little on the homely side though Natalia would never in a million years admit to even thinking that. Her too dark and badly colored hair was pulled tightly back into a strict knot and the buttons on her snuggly fitting dress strained under the pressure. If one of them popped off there was a good chance that someone at the table could lose an eye.

His other siblings looked wide-eyed at her with hopeful smiles, particularly the littlest boy who looked to be about eight years old. He looked more like Igor with floppy curls that must have been too dear to his mother to cut and big brown eyes. The chocolate milk mustache only served to increase his charm.

His two sisters sat next to each other facing his brothers with a chair in between them. The oldest was a slightly gangly girl of about fifteen. Her hair was pulled back into a knot similar to her mothers and their slightly overdone style of dress was the same, but Natalia thought she was probably going through an awkward phase and would probably grow in to her looks if she could get away from her mother. The little girl was about ten with lighter hair that was slightly askew as if she had been playing. She smiled broadly at Natalia and wiggled in her chair with excitement.

"Mother." Igor nodded rather formally.

"Igor, come in." She smiled broadly for Igor and only for Igor, for her eyes never bothered to acknowledge Natalia. "I've been expecting you. Levin's mother owled me that he owled her that you had decided to leave that island early."

"Ah, of course. The babushka hotline."

Mrs. Karkaroff rattled off something in Russian that appeared to take him to task for his cheek for his neck reddened beneath his scruff.

"Natalia only speaks English mother. If you don't mind I would rather we didn't speak Russian in front of her until she becomes familiar with the language."

Mrs. Karkaroff made a sour face but returned to English. "Welcome, Miss Smith" she said with great effort. "Please sit while we wait for Mr. Karkaroff." Natalia went to take the seat between Igor's two sisters. "Not there." Mrs. Karkaroff rolled her eyes. "Between the boys." Natalia felt her cheeks grow hot partly with anger and partly with embarrassment as she took her seat between Igor's brothers and he sat across from her between his sisters. She so wanted to put her best foot forward and was failing to do so, but then again Igor's mother wasn't exactly the most gracious hostess. Natalia vowed right then and there that if she ever had children, she wouldn't treat their friends this way.

Mercifully Igor's father strode into the room every bit as charismatic as his sons. He greeted his family with hearty nods to his sons, a welcome home embrace for Igor, a pat on his wife's shoulder and kisses on the tops of the heads of his two daughters. Natalia sat silent and anxious but he gave her the same kiss on the top of her head. "Lovely to see you again, Natalia. Welcome to St. Petersburg. I hope Igor took the time to show you some of the sights of our city before he brought you into the country."

"We were both quite tired from the train, father. I thought we could do that another day when Natalia is better rested."

"So tell me about your family, Natalia." Igor's mother asked when his father was seated and Pedja began to serve dinner. "Have you always lived in England?"

There was a dead silence at the table as all eyes were upon her. Her terrified heart raced in her chest. She glanced at Igor for support. He smiled and winked at her from across the table. Inside he was seething, for his mother knew full well of her background and was merely trying to intimidate her.

"I'm from London, but I don't know my family." She mumbled at the start but then raised her chin and declared. "I was raised in an orphanage."

Everyone looked at her like she was a freak, and she could feel the heat creep up her neck. Mr. Karkaroff, who was already aware of her background was kind of heart and broke the silence.

"How difficult that must have been for you. A young girl, all alone in the world, it must have been frightening for you."

"Sometimes." She replied. "But it was all I knew so I was used to it." She felt like a dead rat in a punchbowl at the moment. "It was much better after I got to Hogwarts and met others like myself."

"Tell me," Mrs. Karkaroff cleared her throat. "Hogwarts is an expensive school, how did you ever manage to pay for it."

Paranoia swept over her like a tidal wave. Did she know? Could she tell? Women were far more perceptive of flaws in their own kind. Surely her disgusting behavior must show in her appearance in some way. "W-well, they have a fairly generous scholarship program, and when I got older I worked."

"Worked your way through school?" Mrs. Karkaroff raised an eyebrow. She was sure she knew. "Doing what?"

"I was a teaching assistant for Professor Slughorn."

"Horace Slughorn?" Mr. Karkaroff asked her with a smile.

"Ah, yes. Do you know him?"

"Yes." He chomped down on a large scoop of mashed potatoes and Natalia began to think Durmstrang wasn't to blame for all of Igor's poor table manners. "Fine man." He gestured with his fork ignoring the glare his wife was giving him. "Excellent teacher, I'm told."

"Yes he was." She was encouraged now, and offered more. "I also assisted our school healer treating minor injuries and ailments, mainly on the quidditch pitch."

"That's how we met." Igor interjected with a smile and managed to rub his stocking foot against her leg under the table. Natalia's pulled her leg away, terrified that someone would notice.

"And then I worked weekends at a local pub when I was old enough." Natalia bit her lip as soon as she'd said it. Igor was throwing her off and her nerves were getting the best of her or she would never have blurted out that she participated in such a lowly occupation.

"A pub?" Mrs. Karkaroff spit out the word like it had a bad taste.

"Yes." She replied meekly and tried to find her dignity again. "The pay was very good and helped me to save extra money above my tuition costs."

"Hmm." Mr. Karkaroff appraised her for a moment before replying. "Well, I'm glad to see Igor's found himself a girl with a strong work ethic, who knows the value of saving money."

She sighed with relief as his siblings, with the exception of Konstantin, smiled at her seemingly relieved that they had permission from their father to like her. Igor beamed at her.

"Igor has never been much of a saver. Money burns a hole in his pocket." Mrs. Karkaroff raised an eyebrow at her son. "I hope you haven't gone through all your winnings from the Tri-Wizard Tournament."

Igor looked at Natalia and smiled broadly. "I'm afraid I have, but it was more of an investment than an expense."

Natalia's heart began to race again for she knew what was coming.

"Investment? What kind?"

"Jewels."

"Jewels?" His sisters squealed with interest.

"Yes." He rose from his chair and walked around the table and took Natalia's hand, raising her ring for all to see. Igor eyes swept over his siblings before coming to rest on Konstantin. "Mother and father already know, but I may as well tell the rest of you. We're engaged!"

The table erupted with well wishes and Igor's father and sisters came around to hug Natalia. His little brother Ivan bounded over and climbed up onto her lap. "I like her, Igor. She's pretty."

Igor ruffled his baby brother's curls. "I like her too, Ivan." He leaned over and kissed her cheek softly and his scruff tickled her skin.

"Much better than all those others," little Ivan declared with authority.

Natalia couldn't help but giggle at the little tyke's honesty.

"That's enough out of you," Igor admonished his brother. "Go finish your dinner."

Only Mrs. Karkaroff and his older brother didn't seem to share their enthusiasm but neither raised any objection and faked niceties throughout the meal.

The food was rich and plentiful but Natalia was too nervous to eat much, despite reassuring looks from Igor. The family lingered long over the table with wine flowing and the younger ones sharing stories about their back yard adventures with Igor, much to the delight of all. Eventually the clock struck nine and Mrs. Karkaroff shooed the little ones upstairs to get ready for bed. Natalia was physically and emotionally exhausted and was ready for bed herself. The only thing that made her want to stay up was that she was one hundred percent sure she would not be allowed to sleep with Igor under his parent's roof before they were married. She accepted the rule but dreaded any separation from him.

"Natalia, I've had Pedja ready the guest room in the east wing for you." Mrs. Karkaroff announced after dinner.

"Thank you Mrs. Karkaroff."

However Igor was not satisfied. "The east side? That room is tiny mother and the sun comes in the windows at an ungodly hour. Can she not have the room in the front of the house?"

"No. Your grandmother will be staying there for a few days when she comes in for your party."

Natalia certainly didn't want to be a bother to the woman who already didn't like her. "Igor, really I'm sure it's fine. I don't want to be any trouble."

His expression was half a smile and half annoyed. "It's no trouble, Natalia. I'll give you my room and I'll take the other. The view over the grounds is wonderful."

She shook her head. "I don't want to kick you out of your room."

He shrugged. "I've seen the view you haven't. Please let me do this."

Obviously she was not going to win this argument so she relented. Igor retired into the study with his father and Konstantin for a brandy after dinner. Natalia received no similar invitation from his mother and was actually relieved to be able to plead exhaustion and have Pedja show her to Igor's room.

He led her into a bedroom with a huge bay window overlooking a large pond with a thick forest behind it. She admired the view.

"This is beautiful. " She was speaking to Pedja but when she heard the door click shut behind her realized that he wasn't hanging about to be social. It was just as well. She unpacked her minimal belongings and put on her nightgown. It was the first time she would have it on all night. Igor liked to sleep skin to skin and she wondered how she would ever fall asleep without his strong arms around her.

She brushed her teeth in his bathroom, chuckling at the rubber ducky sitting on the edge of his bathtub. He would say it was Ivan's but she somehow doubted it. Then she walked out to admire the room.

It was appointed in dark cherry wood with bookshelves along the walls. It had a rustic stone fireplace that was lit and warming the room, with a large dark green chair beside it. Leaning against the hearth were his hunting rifles and she walked over to touch them, strange to see them have a place in a wizard's home, but this was Igor and nothing should surprise her about him. She walked to his bookshelves and looked at what he had read all the thoughts and concepts that might have crossed his mind.

"Does this meet your exacting standards, Mrs. Karkaroff?" Natalia jumped and turned to find him on the large four poster bed, resting on his elbows with his feet dangling off the edge.

Natalia sighed with relief for she so needed him after that excruciating dinner. "I'm not Mrs. Karkaroff yet."

"Details, details, in my mind you are. Get over here." He motioned her over and she wantonly climbed on top of him, pushing him back on the bed and kissing him deeply. "Mmmm," he moaned and grabbed her bum, pulling her hips against his.

"Hey, we better stop. Your parents won't like this one bit. You shouldn't even be in here." She tried to wiggle away from him but he held her tight.

"Phhhft, they'll never check."

"Someone will find out. Servants know everything…and your brother."

"Pedja would never squeal on me. We have an understanding. As for Constantine, I've got so much dirt on him he wouldn't dare." He took out his wand and warded the door then cast a silencing charm, before flipping her onto her back and pinning her beneath him. "Hmmm," he raised his eyebrows naughtily and pursed his lips together. "I like you in the position."

"Feel free to put me in it anytime." She smiled and closed her eyes as he began to trail warm kisses down her jawline, then down her throat. She sighed and indulged her fingers by weaving them through his dark waves.

Abruptly he pulled back and smiled at her. "This is so wild," he giggled like a naughty little boy.

Natalia laughed at his expression. "What? You've never had sex in your room before?"

He considered her question for a moment before answering, "Well, at least not with another person." She dissolved into a fit of giggles while he snickered and buried his face between her breasts. She so hoped it would be like this forever

_AN: Hmmmmm…hope it will be like this forever. Do you think so? Yes? You don't know me very well then Let me know what you think of Iggy's family as I'm totally making them up. Vodka shots with magic sprinkles to all my readers and a butter beer chaser for those who review!_

_Hope all of my peeps in the American south are surviving hurricane Isaac this week. We had massive flooding here but it's all better now. _


	45. Chapter 45 Lying Eyes

CHAPTER FORTY-FIVE

LYING EYES

Lucius wandered listlessly about the house after returning from his seaside excursion feeling depressed for a multitude of reasons. Seeing Natalia in a revealing bathing suit looking well, prosperous and on the arms of another man was maddening. She looked sexier than the memories he utilized in his masturbatory fantasies, her girlish shape now flowering more gracefully than he could have foretold. Mirrored sunglasses allowed him the freedom to ogle other women and he availed himself of their protection as he leered at her ass swaying seductively while she strolled down the beach. When Karkaroff possessively caressed it with his large hand adorned with his Durmstrang ring it made Lucius only marginally jealous, but massively horny. If he couldn't have her, he would settle for voyeuristic pleasures and mused about what they did to each other in bed. Surely that young buck was giving it to her hard and often.

After a day of creeping about the beach but before dinner, he'd begged Narcissa for some release but he was consistently denied as she put on airs of virginity. His fiancé was the second most frustrating witch he'd ever known, but one day she would be his in marriage and there would be no more refusals and he would be her lord and master. He looked forward to making her his own.

The Dark Lord had tasked him with recruiting Igor to join them by taking away the things that mattered most, and that was Natalia. As humiliating as it was to admit, there was no chance that he could lure her away from Karkaroff on charm alone, particularly considering their history. He'd lost her long ago, if he ever really had her to begin with. No, he would have to utilize other means to divide them and his father would be his accomplice. Perhaps it was wrong to bring him in on it, but Lucius blamed him for much of the failings with Natalia. He would have married her when she was pregnant if it weren't for the constant pressure and demands of his father. He knocked on the door to his father's study.

"Enter," Abraxis snapped before looking up from his desk. He smiled an unnaturally toothy grin and his voice softened. "Oh, hello, son. I thought you would be out flying with your sister on such a beautiful day."

"I think I got a bit too much sun this week," Lucius responded before flopping down on the couch near the unlit fireplace.

"You haven't said much about your trip. Did you enjoy yourself? "

"Yes sir." He was being deliberately coy for it would not do to unload this tale too quickly without being in danger of overplaying his hand.

Abraxis sensed his sadness and tried again to pull him in to conversation. "Sasha tells me there were lots of your friends on the island. I hope your eye didn't wander in front of your fiancé." He grinned as he spoke, for although this was technically an admonishment, he was quite proud that his son was a bit of a tom cat.

"No." He fiddled with a tassel on the end of a pillow. "Did she tell you that Natalia was there?"

Abraxis gave him a confounded look. "Who?"

It irritated Lucius that he wouldn't remember her. To him she was quite unforgettable. "Natalia Smith. As much as I wish you had forgotten I'm sure you have not."

"Ah yes, that expensive bit of baggage I had to pay off to save your randy hide." Abraxis waved his hand dismissively. "I hope you had sense enough not to sully your wand with that rubbish again, or at least took precautions."

"No sir, I learned my lesson."

"Look once you're married you can have it off with whoever you like, but right now just try not to muck it up. We can't have Narcissa backing out."

"I'm afraid it's someone else's turn have her muck up their life now."

"Oh? She's got another one on the hook has she? Well no surprise, she is rather attractive, might as well capitalize on her assets. Who's the unfortunate fellow? "

Lucius paused for effect before answering. "Igor Karkaroff."

The elder Malfoy slouched back in his chair and gaped at his son. "Oh no. Alexia's son? Oh my, my, that poor boy. He should have stayed with our Sasha. Does he know what a cheap bit of goods he's getting?"

"He seems quite blind to her shortcomings. It was a shame to see them flaunt their affections so blatantly in front of Sasha. When they announced their engagement, she was inconsolable. I'm sure you've noticed how miserable she's been since we returned." Sasha was miserable, but it had nothing to do with Igor. Severus was now no longer speaking with her, preferring to confine his interactions to those within the Dark Lord's circle or those who could further his objectives. Sasha fell into neither category.

"That cad. I think it's time I paid a visit to my old friend Alexi."

"That's a very kind gesture, father. I'm certain he would do the same for you." Lucius turned to go but then paused. "Father, please don't mention this to Sasha. She's terribly embarrassed about it and would die of shame if she thought I told you."

"This will stay between us on Malfoy honor." Lucius smirked as he walked out of the room. Malfoy honor was an oxymoron.

Natalia felt Igor ease out of bed at dawn before her eyes fluttered open. The first rays of light were beginning to stream through the window and she watched him dress quietly in the shadows as she memorizing the contours to the muscles in his legs and across his back. His hair had grown well past his shoulders and was a mass of post romp mayhem. He stretched and ruffled the back of it while arching his back and flexing his shoulders back. He was a beautiful specimen of a man.

"There's a brush in the bathroom," she whispered.

"Oh," he turned to face her with a sleepy expression. "I didn't want to wake you."

She shrugged and hugged her pillow enjoying this cozy moment with him. "I'm always up early you know."

"I thought I'd better sneak back to my room before we're discovered in a compromising position," he teased.

"I rather enjoy this position, but you're probably right. Still, I hate for you to go."

"What shall we do today?"

She raised her eyebrows naughtily at him and curled her finger encouraging him to come back to her.

"Witch, you're insatiable." He crept softly back to the bed crawled on top of her still naked form and kissed her languidly while running his hands over her skin. "I like that about you."

"I am at your disposal, Mr. Karkaroff." She arched her back, pushing herself against him and tangling her fingers through his bed head.

"Uh," he groaned breathlessly. "You're a minx. I can't wait to marry you."

"I'm looking forward to it. You know we haven't talked about dates."

"August fifteenth." Igor announced the date decisively as if he had planned this all along and it was not up for discussion. Some witches would have been incensed by this since wedding planning was something that evolved from birth in the minds of silly romantic princesses. Natalia was content to let him have his way however. Unlike most brides whose dreams carried them only to the altar and no further, she was more interested in the actual marriage. Still, she wondered what the date could mean.

"Why that date?"

He was kissing her neck when she asked and only moved a millimeter away when he asked, "Why not?"

"Is there some significance to that date?"

"No." He mumbled, now moving to her shoulder. "It's a couple weeks before school starts. I'm figuring I'll need at minimum a two week mad honeymoon sex odyssey to get you out of my system so I can study."

Natalia rolled on top of him. "Rest assured Mr. Karkaroff, the rest of your life will be a mad sex odyssey." Then they whiled away the dawn caressing each other gently but not rushing, for they had the rest of their lives.

Natalia was shown around the town, or more accurately shown off around the town by Igor over the next few days. She found the sights, people and general culture of wizarding St. Petersburg were charming and made more so by the love in Igor's eyes as he shared them all with her. He was obviously proud of his heritage but this was a new discovery for her. Back at Hogwarts he always seemed a little embarrassed about it. It made her feel good to see him in his own element. They toured wizarding sections of St. Petersburg and the outlying countryside. She met the owner of the broom shop where he'd spent many hours hanging about as a lad. She met the plump grandmotherly looking woman who owned the sweet shop and who gave them a celebratory chocolate cupcake and pinched Igor's cheeks until they turned red. She met important wealthy friends of his fathers who greeted them with such gusto that she was certain he hadn't told any about her background. She wasn't sure if that was a good thing to a bad thing_._

Though his father seemed to warm up to her, his mother remained just one step short of hostile. Konstantine was aloof and his wife Anna was merely a scrawnier more disagreeable version of their mother. Natalia avoided the three of them like the black plague. Igor's sisters were quite sweet and charming, eager to have another sister and wanting to know all about London. Natalia didn't have the heart to paint anything but a glamorous picture of British life. And then there was Ivan. He followed Igor around like a puppy and Igor made every effort to involve him until he wanted to be alone with Natalia. On several occasions he went to town with them, walking between them and holding both their hands and begging them to swing him back and forth over and over. He was growing quite attached to Natalia, even announcing, "Igor, if you decided not to marry her, can I have her?"

Mr. Karkaroff watched Igor and Natalia from the window with an ache in his heart. It gave him a sick feeling to see such a familiar scene. It had been twenty two years since he had his heart irreparably damaged by the witch that so favored the one who now held his sons heart. She had been a young and beautiful witch from one of the outlying villages. He'd been out flying one evening with his brothers when they'd suffered a terrible mishap. As usual they'd been flying too quickly through the forest and he and his elder brothers both smacked into trees, shattering their brooms. Not feeling confident enough to apparate all three of them, his eldest brother made them walk home. It was getting dark and they stopped by a local family's home for the night and to contact their parents by fire chat to make them aware of their plight. And that's when he'd met her. Olga was the fourteen year old daughter of the peasant wizard who had taken them in. Her hair was raven and glossy and she looked several years older than she actually was. She was gregarious, rather forward for a girl her age with an easy laugh and thirst for adventure. He was immediately taken with her and she with him, or so he thought.

His parents vehemently opposed the match, but he was every bit as pig headed as Igor and would not be swayed. They told him she was after his money and status but he refused to believe, blinded by her beauty and distracted by the eventual rigorous sex with the only witch he'd ever been with before his current wife. So he asked for her hand, and was promptly given it by her father who was relieved to have his only daughter taken off his hands. For her father was a bit of a wanderer and never in once place for long. This was going to free him up to move on.

He was in his seventh year at Durmstrang and competing in the tournament which was being held at his home school that year. A select few Hogwarts students were visiting and she took an immediate interest in them when she visited the school for the first task. He thought little of it considering she was a country girl. When she returned to watch the second task she became friendly with a few of the Brits to the point that the two of them had a huge row after the task. He was insanely jealous and further incensed that she seemed to have so little regard for his feelings. However she soothed him with assurances and was so convincing that he had no idea she'd begun to write to a skinny ginger from Gryffindor who played the guitar, sported a goatee and had a reputation of being a womanizer. When she returned for the third task she barely took notice of the distraught Alexi and the night before the task she ran off with said Gryffindor. He was devastated and further humiliated when he bungled the final task and lost the tournament to one of the womanizer's buddies. For months he'd moped about in a funk, pushed further into depression when he heard of her exploits in London. Eventually his friends didn't have the heart to continue to relay information to him about her marriage or unfortunate financial circumstances. The Gryffindor had lied about his prospects and they were quite destitute. His parents, in an effort to help him pull himself together arranged his marriage to Vilma and he'd been with her ever since. She wasn't a horrible wife, but he'd never felt the electricity he'd felt for Olga.

He looked back out to see Igor plant a playful kiss on Natalia's cheek and his heart sank at the news he knew he would have to deliver in a few moments. Igor was about to be crushed as he had been and though he wouldn't wish it on anyone, his son deserved to know the truth. Alexi had gone to London to do some background research on Natalia. His inquiries at the orphanage were met with a cool distain and statements of privacy policies. Muggles could be so annoying. He'd even cheated and invaded the mind of the woman in charge of the institution, but still learned nothing of her background. Natalia had been abandoned on their doorstep, and they knew nothing of her parentage.

He was about to return home when he bumped into Abraxis Malfoy coming out of the Ministry of Magic. Abraxis greeted him warmly for they had bonded during the failed attempt to arrange the marriage of Igor and Sasha. They decided to duck into a pub for a liquid lunch. Abraxis hadn't changed; he was still pretentious and bragged incessantly about Lucius while barely mentioning Sasha. He went on and on about his son's engagement to Narcissa Black who was a catch in any country. When he finally took a breath to ask about Igor, Alexi hesitated. He almost didn't tell him about Natalia, knowing Abraxis would turn his nose up. But he would find out eventually so Alexi plunged forward not wanting Abraxis to think he was ashamed.

"Igor? Why he's engaged."

"Outstanding. Of course I'm sad it didn't work out with Sasha, but who's the lucky girl."

Alexi hesitated before responding, "Natalia Smith. I believe she was in Slytherin. Very nice girl."

"Natalia…Smith you say?" Abraxis raised his eyebrow at the distasteful name.

"Yes, do you know her?" Alexi leaned forward, anxious for any newsy nugget of information.

"I'm afraid I have had the misfortune of meeting her."

"Misfortune?" His heart sank for his son.

"Great misfortune."

"And what was so misfortunate about your meeting?"

Abraxis sighed heavily and motioned the waitress over. He ordered them another round of scotch and then turned back to his friend. "Alexi, we've known each other for many years. What I'm about to tell you is something I wasn't planning on sharing with ANYONE…EVER. Please understand I'm telling you this father to father because I think well of you and your son."

"Get on with it."

"Well, it seems my Lucius was also acquainted with Miss Smith."

And so Abraxis unloaded the entire horrid story, the relationship, the pregnancy, the ultimatums and the payoff. Conveniently he did not relay the unbreakable vow, the infidelities, the manipulation, which might paint his family in an even worse light and was unaware of the prostitution, the Dark Lord's involvement and the brutal rape. By the time he finished, Alexi was slouching in his seat and broken hearted for his son, but he knew what he had to do. Igor must know everything and he would be sadly tasked with making sure he did. It was the worst part of fatherhood, knowing that what you had to tell your child would destroy their innocence but that it was time that they grew up. He remembered Igor's face when his bossy older brother told him that Father Christmas was a myth and knew this would be a thousand times worse. So Alexi stood by the window, watched them walk towards the house and mourned each moment of happiness, knowing it must all end soon.

He heard their harmonious laughter as they walked into the house and went to the door of his study to summon them inside.

"Igor, Natalia, come in. I'd like to speak with you." Oh, their sweet faces made the first crack in the top of his heart. He briefly considered not telling what he knew, but then thought better of it. Igor needed his protection from gold diggers and social climbers. Natalia was charming, but sadly, not what she appeared to be.

"Certainly father." Igor whispered something playful in Natalia's ear and she giggled again. Alexi had to turn away before he decided he didn't have the heart to go through with it. Never one to mince words, he started right in without small talk the moment they entered the room.

"I ran into an old friend of mine in London." He began ominously.

"Oh, who's that?" Igor asked, clueless and bewitched by the witch by his side.

"Abraxis Malfoy."

Natalia felt her blood run cold at the mention of the name. _Oh God, he knew. Please make it not be so. Oh, please no_. Her palms began to sweat and her stomach churned.

Igor, oblivious and annoyed at the mention of the name, rolled his eyes. "And how are the Malfoys?"

"Fine." Alexi looked briefly at Natalia just long enough to see her flinch. "He told me a very interesting story."

Natalia's throat went dry. _No, please no. He's everything to me, oh please God don't let this happen_. She wanted to run, or faint, she didn't know which but could do neither for she was paralyzed with fear.

"Oh, what story was that?" Poor Igor was still blissfully ignorant.

"It seems Lucius ran afoul with a very devious and disreputable witch." He glanced back at Natalia and this time noticed all the color had drained from her face. So it was true. The realization made his stomach churn.

"Not surprising. He's a bit of a sleaze." Igor chuckled and looked for Natalia to join him. She didn't, and he began to have an inkling of what was happening. From then on his eyes remained on her rather than his father who was addressing him.

"It seems this witch tried to trap him."

"Trap him?" He answered flatly, still fixated on his Natalia and noticing that her hands were trembling.

"Yes. She screwed around with him for a while and then demanded that he marry her."

"I thought he was engaged to Narcissa Black." Igor searched for an easy out. His heart lifted for a moment. He already knew or kind of knew all of this.

"He is." Alexi walked over to the liquor cabinet and poured himself a short shot of homemade vodka and gunned it. This would hurt him nearly as much as it hurt Igor, but he deserved to know the truth. If he stayed with her then so be it but he deserved to know. "They are still betrothed. It seems that when Lucius refused this witch she announced that she was with child."

"Really." Igor's voice was flat. Natalia knew he had his suspicions. She wished she could do something to stop this conversation but there was nothing to be done. Too terrified to lift her head, all she could do was watch the nightmare unfold.

"Really. Apparently she was making quite a fuss about it and in order to get her to go away Abraxis had to pay her a substantial sum of money."

"Hmmm…well that's not surprising." Igor at this point knew, but was in a mountain of denial. "Daddy paying his son's way out."

Alexi wished Igor would put it all together so he wouldn't have to hit him over the head with this. "The interesting part is that there was never a child. She was either lying or aborted the child."

"Not surprising either. When you mess with women like that you can't expect anything else." Igor turned to see Natalia sitting on the sofa; head bowed gravely, hands folded in her lap. The knot in the pit of his stomach grew exponentially heavier.

"Tell me, Natalia." Mr. Karkaroff continued, "You knew Lucius in school, did you not?"

She couldn't speak, merely nodded, still looking down. Igor took two steps towards her but stopped.

"And you were aware of this little tale, were you not?"

Again she could only nod. Tears streamed down her face and one dropped onto her lap, betraying her. She was still bound by the unbreakable vow and could not defend herself.

Alexi angered by her lack of response which he considered a lack for respect for his son, went on the attack. "Of course you are." He hissed.

"Father, what are you getting at?" Igor's hands were shaking as he looked back and forth between his father and Natalia.

"Why don't you ask your fiancé?"

"Natalia," Igor's voice cracked like an adolescents. "What is he talking about?"

She finally looked up at him with her red rimmed eyes welling up with tears. When she spoke, her grave voice was barely above a whisper. "Igor, I'm so sorry."

"What?" His breathing became labored. His whole world was beginning to crumble in a matter of minutes. Five minutes ago, they had held hands and walked across the grounds while he dreamed of children with this woman. Now she was admitting she was nothing but a gold digger. It was too much to comprehend. He knew they'd been together, Merlin, he'd practically witnessed it, but a child, a payoff, and then an abortion? It was not to be born. "Sorry for what? You can't mean…"

Alexi tried to put his dear son out of his misery, annoyed that Natalia would not. "It was Natalia ,son. I'm sorry."

"Shut up!" Igor rushed to her side, taking her hands in his own one last time. "Natalia, look at me, tell me. Tell me this isn't true." His voice betrayed his increasing desperation. "Tell me this is a lie."

"Yes, tell him Natalia, if that's your real name."

She lifted her face to his. She couldn't tell him anything. She couldn't even correct the flaws in the story or defend herself in any way without breaking the vow for it was too broad. "I'm so sorry, my love."

He pulled away from her like she had a contagious disease. Horror was evident in his contorted features, but he had to know more. "If I hadn't asked you to marry me, would you have tried to trap me too? Tell me the truth."

"No," she sobbed. "No of course not."

He wanted to believe her, but felt like a fool. For months everyone he cared about told him this would end badly, that she couldn't possibly love him for anything other than his money. He didn't want to believe those fools, but now he finally realized the truth; he was the fool. "But you took Malfoy's money. Natalia, why didn't you tell me this?"

She couldn't answer him, she only shook with sobs.

He was infuriated. Answers. She owed him answers, but she was so fucking ambivalent about hurting him she didn't bother. He felt terribly betrayed and stupid and began to scream at her. "How could you keep this from me? All our talk of a future, of honesty, of love, it was all a lie wasn't it?"

"No," she insisted through sobs. "No it wasn't. I love you. You must know that."

"I don't know what I know. How could you lie to me?" Igor was yelling at the top of his lungs now. Mr. Karkaroff backed stealthy out of the room. The damage was done.

"I didn't want to lie." She shook her head violently. "Igor, please I love you."

Oh, how he wanted to believe her. He wanted to give her a chance. She'd given him so many chances. "Then tell me what happened."

"I can't." Her head shook violently again.

"Why?"

"I just can't."

What a feeble thing to say. How dare she treat him like this? How dare she stand in his house and protect Malfoy. "Because it's all true isn't it? All of it!" He screamed. "How dare you do this to me? I loved you! I wanted to marry you!"

Her heart stopped. "Please don't say that like it's in the past."

His mind switched off and he became irrational. "This was all just some social climbing to you wasn't it?"

"No. How can you say that?"

"Because you're a LIAR!" He yelled so loud the window pane shook. "All of this was a lie! You never loved me!" He punched his chest, hating his foolish heart. "You loved my money. You fucked Malfoy for years, oh yes I knew of your liaisons. That's not the issue, we both had a past, I can't judge you for that. But then you tried to trap him. When he wouldn't be sucked in by your trashy little plot, you bilked money out of his father. Is that what you were planning to do to my father and I?"

"No. I would never do that to you." It chilled her to see how quickly he turned on her.

"Then why lie to me? If you have nothing to be ashamed of, why not tell me. Did you carry his child or was it a trap?"

"Igor, I can't tell you anything."

"So your loyalty still lies with him I see."

"No. It lies with you. I just…please, I love you."

"You don't know the meaning of the word. We have nothing more to say to each other." He started to leave the room but she ran after him, grapping his hand and holding him.

"No, please don't say that."

"Get out of my sight."

"No, look at me. Look at me and tell me you don't love me. I know you do. I love you."

He looked at her as requested, but he was ice cold. "The person I loved never existed. She was an illusion. A lie." Then he stormed out of the room.

Mr. Karkaroff was outside the door waiting and put his hand on his son's shoulder. "I'm sorry to tell you this, my son, but when it was told to me, I had to tell you."

"Get the fuck away from me." Igor shrugged him off violently and stormed out of the house.

Natalia gathered what was left of her dignity and walked out of the room. Mr. Karkaroff was still in the hallway. "I've taken the liberty of packing your things." He nodded towards the trunk by the door. Her humiliation was complete, or so she thought.

"And here is a little something for your…trouble." He handed her a hefty velvet money bag.

"What the hell is this?" Normally she would never have sworn in front of Igor's father out of respect. However she needed something to make her sound tougher.

"Twenty thousand galleons."

"I don't want your money." She pushed the bag away.

"Natalia, you haven't applied to university, you have no job, and no plans. I'm not paying you off. I'm just giving this to you so you can get a start in life."

"Fuck you." She couldn't believe that came out of her mouth.

"Yes well…despite my feelings or Igor's, I don't wish you any ill will. Please take it. Consider it a loan if you like. When you become established, you may pay me back if it makes you feel better."

She eyed the money, and against her better judgment, accepted it. Then she removed her ring and looked longingly at it one last time before placing it in his hand. "Please tell Igor…I did love him…with all my heart."

Igor walked about twenty meters out of the house before he turned back. He took two steps towards home then stopped, unsure which way to go. His breath was hitching in his chest and something welled up inside him, building before it exploded out of his throat in the form of a guttural scream. He crouched on the ground and covered his face, shaking with anger and pain. What if she saw him like this. No, it would not do. How could she lie to him? How could she fuck that guy, trap that guy and lie about that guy? How could she lie to him above all others? His head twitched from side to side and he rose up again and paced on the gravel path, not knowing where to turn. He couldn't think.  
>"Accio, Firebolt!" He finally shouted for lack of something better and the second the broom landed in his hand he was off, flying far away from that horrible place where his world just ended.<p>

He roared through the forest at recklessly high speeds. What did it matter if he smacked a tree? If he broke his fool neck, who would care? Not Natalia. Natalia, the thought of her not caring for him, made him suddenly exhausted and he slowed his pace, coasting mournfully as he came up upon the banks of the Neva River. He pulled up to a stop and dismounted on a secluded bank on the edge of a grove of trees. The broom dropped carelessly to the ground and he fell to his knees and stared across the water. His head dropped forward until it rested on the ground and he remained in that position. Life was over. It was just over for him. Everyone had been right. They were too different, only he had no idea how different. Dishonesty on such a scale was unfathomable.

The guttural scream once again unleashed and his body convulsed in agony while he sobbed and pounded the ground with his fist. "Natalia. Oh God, Natalia. How could you do this to me-e-e?"

_AN: The end. No just kidding! Ugh my poor Igor! Those dang Malfoy's are horrible! But we love them anyway. Yes, I have bad boy issues but I bet some of you do too__ What do you think of her taking the money? Smart move? Bad judgment? Maybe both. It was a lot of cash. Thanks for all the PM's, follows and reviews. They absolutely make my day! Please hug Iggy in your dreams tonight….he does need a hug…it was a bad day. _


	46. Chapter 46

CHAPTER FORTY SIX

Gimme Shelter

Natalia stepped out of Igor's home for the last time and began walking with heavy steps towards town for lack of a better idea. She now had no home, no protectors, no job and no university to attend. Never at a time in her life had she been so free of obligations, and it was already maddening. The tragic look on her beloved Igor's face was something that would surely haunt her for the rest of her life, and she felt she had no one to blame but herself. This had been a foolish liaison, everyone had said so, including Severus. She was rubbish from the fringes of society. How could she ever think that she could marry a man like Igor?

After trudging mindlessly along for a half hour, she decided to apparate to the train station. What other options were there? Obviously she could not stay. Dissaperating back to London was too far to be safe for her experience level. So she booked a train ticket and settled into a sleeping berth on the train. She slept as soon as her head hit the pillow and for the next five hours. When she awoke, it was dark out and her stomach was growling, so she made her way to the dining car. She was late, and the car was nearly empty which suited her fine. She ordered large vodka, a roll and a tray of meat and cheeses. The vodka came first, and she took a huge gulp, and then winced.

"Careful, my dear. Spirits can have a rapid affect." It was Oblonsky, strolling over to her booth.

Natalia groaned indiscreetly, plopped her elbows on the table and covered her face with her hand. Oh, surely she would die of shame right there in that very spot. Headmaster Oblonsky was close with Igor, and he probably already knew the whole horrible tale.

He plopped presumptuously down across from her and smiled warmly. He didn't know. "And where is my favorite alumni?"

Natalia raised an eyebrow and took another sip of vodka, smaller this time so it didn't burn. "Back in St. Petersburg."

"Oh?" His question hung in the air for a very long time. Mercifully the porter brought the food and she avoided his question by digging into the food. However he was a master of the pause and waited it out until she became so uncomfortable she felt a need to respond.

"We just broke up," she finally responded after chewing a few bites.

"Really? I'm shocked." The look on his face left no doubt that this did shock him. "Why did you leave that boy that was so in love with you? He must be devastated."

She shook her head. "He wanted me to go. It was his decision." She stared out the window of the train at the passing landscape, each tree that went by took her further and further away from him. It was too painful to watch and so she closed her eyes tightly.

"Oh, I see." He paused again, but this time she was onto him and did not answer. "I'm sorry."

"Thanks." She was grateful for his kind words but his accent reminded her of Igor. She took another gulp of vodka.

"Well a beautiful witch should never drink alone, particularly when travelling unaccompanied, terribly unsafe. May I dine with you?"

"Oh sure." The hits just kept on coming.

He called the porter over and ordered a rather large meal for himself complete with a bottle of vodka that she hoped he would share. She wanted to be drunk, to forget.

"So where are you going?" Natalia asked once the porter brought his drink. She was pretty sure she knew the answer already for this train would only have one logical stop for him.

"Hogsmeade." He smiled and she noticed a softness in his eyes that she hadn't seen before. He was a handsome older man but she'd never considered it until now. "I should think that would be obvious."

"I mean are you going to see Rosemerta?"

"Of course. Can you keep a secret?"

Natalia rolled her eyes. "You have NO idea."

"I'm going to ask her to marry me."

"Oh," Natalia choked, illogical jealousy caused her throat to dry up and clench and she had to clear it before speaking again. "That's wonderful." It was wonderful news, but she couldn't be happy about it. Fat tears rolled across her cheeks though her expression remained otherwise impassive.

Oblonsky like most men in front of a crying woman became uncomfortable and squirmed in his chair a bit. In an attempt to be useful he reached into the breast pocket of his coat, pulled out a handkerchief with the Durmstrang crest and offered it to her. "Oh Miss Smith, I don't like to see you like this at all. You were so good for my favorite student Igor. He was at his best when he was with you, finally living up to his full potential." He meant to be helpful but his bumbling speech only made the tears roll with increasing regularity. "Surely there is something we can do. Perhaps I should speak to him. Young men's fancies are easily diverted it's true but the smart ones come around."

"No," she sniffed. "I'm afraid there's nothing to be done about it." She wiped her eyes with the back of her hand, stretching her neck and raising her face to the ceiling in a vain hope that the tears would flow backwards into her eyes and not escape, but it was no good. It was too difficult to be around those Igor loved who reminded her of him. "Headmaster, please don't think I'm rude, but I think I shall go back to back to my sleeping car. It's been a terrible day." She quickly made her way past him and headed for the sleeping car again.

For days following Natalia's untimely departure Igor lay prostrate with grief in his bed with the shades drawn and the covers pulled over his head. He did not bath, eat or speak, but teetered between painful bouts with raw emotion and hopeless apathy. On the third day of his self-imposed sequestration, his mother tapped softly at his door but he ignored it. She ignored him ignoring her and entered anyway. He rolled over and growled at the thought of that woman daring to enter his room. As if she gave a damn about his happiness after the way she treated Natalia. It was irrational to blame her but he did nonetheless.

She set the tray down on the edge of his nightstand and brushed the hair out of his face as she did when he was a small boy. He so resembled a little boy again in that moment. "You have to eat something, Igor."

"Take it away," he grumbled bitterly.

"Oh, darling I hate to see you so sad," she cooed as she rubbed his cheek lightly but he pushed her hand off angrily.

"I said take it away," he now hissed with venomous anger. "You haven't had the balls to check on me for three days, sending house elves up here to see to me. You've never given a damn about my happiness, only what my potential marital connections might do for you, so don't come up here with your pious airs of motherhood. I see right through you."

"I didn't raise you to talk to me like that." She stood and huffed indignantly.

"Well life doesn't always turn out like we plan now does it? Take this slop and get out." He rolled over while she did as he asked. Before the door shut behind her, he could hear her weeping but felt no remorse for hurting her feelings. Let her feel as bad as he did. He closed his eyes and drifted back to sleep.

He awoke around midnight to the familiar stench of vodka and tobacco that was unmistakably his father. He opened one eye to find his father sitting in a chair he'd pulled up about four feet away from Igor's bed. "What?" He asked his father but it sounded like more of an accusation than a question.

"I understand you're in pain, son." He began softly.

"Do you?" Igor's tone was sarcastic. What could this man know of such agony? In Igor's eyes he was a passionless man in an empty marriage. He knew nothing.

"Yes," he replied forlornly. "You may not believe that but I do. I also know you can't sulk like this forever."

"Watch me."

"I know you're angry but I'm sure that in time you'll see that this was for the best."

"In time you'll drop dead from lack of passion and I'll dance on your grave."

Alexi ignored the cheap shot and kept his fatherly cool. "Your mother told me you were rather hostile."

"On the contrary, I'm quite tolerant at the moment, but you're pushing your luck."

"Check your tongue, boy. I'm still your father."

The thought of being related to this heartless man made Igor snap for he sat bolt upright in bed. "Get out! Just get out! This is all your fault. You've ruined me, ruined us both."

"It's not I that ruined you, my son." He hadn't planned to telling him about the money but under the circumstances, perhaps he should know everything. "If you're worried about what she's going to do now that you've cast her out, don't. I took care of her."

Igor narrowed his eyes and swung his legs over the side of the bed. "What do you mean you 'took care of her'?"

"Well, she hadn't signed up for University and had no prospects other than attaching herself to you so I took care of her. I gave her some money." He shrugged, it was sadly common in this situation and he was no cad. Although he didn't want to be bilked out of money, he felt different giving it to her freely.

"How much?"

"Twenty thousand."

"Twe-twenty thousand?" Igor was astounded at such generosity from a man he could barely squeeze a ruble out of.

"Yes. I thought it was the least we could do. You wouldn't want her living on the street would you?"

He shook his head in disbelief and raked his fingers through his tangled hair. "And she took it?" He so wanted her to be well taken care of but surely her pride would not allow it.

"Yes. Without hesitation I might ad. It was after all, what she wanted."

He might as well have been kicked in the balls for the pain was just as bad. He was on the verge of a tearful rage but would rather die than have his father see him cry. "GET OUT!"

Seeing that it was useless to make a rational argument with an irrational man, the elder Karkaroff retreated without argument. Once again Igor closed his eyes and tried to find escape in slumber but he'd already slept for days and he could not hide in it's darkness, so he lay there seeing nothing but her face and feeling nothing but pain. This is what people meant when they said they had a broken heart, for his heart literally hurt, literally ached for her and literally hated her for doing this to him. His anger boiled over into shameful tears that burned his eyes and once again he wailed an unmanly cry into his pillow. He wished he didn't know. He wished for blissful ignorance. How long could they have gone on like that if he didn't know? Could it have been years, or only months or a few precious weeks, a few priceless hours before his illusions were shattered? His intentions ran the gambit of wanting to confront her once more and beat the truth out of her, to never wanting to see her again. He wouldn't trade how she made him feel for the world, his lavender girl, but at the same time he wished he'd never met her. Why couldn't it be last year, before all this hell descended upon him, or rather he dove in headfirst?

His elder brother was the next poor fool delegated to tray to draw him out of his funk, a foolish choice. By the time the unfortunate Konstantine happened into his room at ten the next morning, Igor was coiled like a paranoid snake and struck at the first opportunity when he was addressed. "Time to pull yourself together, Igor. You look like shit."

Igor was in no mood for brotherly banter and launched himself out of bed, tackling Konstantine on the floor and pounding him several times across the chest before he just didn't have the energy anymore. Normally their horseplay would go on for some time, but the fight was out of Igor and after a few good shots he rolled off his brother. Konstantine lay there breathing hard but not fighting back, seemingly understanding Igor's need to get his aggression out. "Feel better?" He asked calmly.

"No."

Konstantine pulled himself up and straightened his clothes while appraising his slovenly brother. "You stink. Take a shower."

"Fuck you." Igor mumbled before rolling over and hiding his face so his brother couldn't see him.

Konstantine sensed the pointlessness of further discussion and wisely chose to leave but not before saying, "I love you, brother." Igor ignored him.

Igor judged by the tone of the light coming through the cracks in the curtains that it was late afternoon when Levin showed up. "Hey," he said softly when he entered. It was the first voice Igor had heard in days that didn't positively grate on his last nerve.

"Hey," Igor greeted his friend without the lack of hostility he'd reserved for his family. Of all people, Levin was one of the few he could always trust. He was still in the same spot on the floor that he had occupied hours earlier when Konsantine left, but managed to find the will to pull himself up to sitting. "I suppose you heard."

"Yes," Levin began softly. "Your sister Myra owled me. She's quite worried about you. She said you've been quite hostile towards your family and haven't left the room."

"And did she tell you why I hate my family?"

"She doesn't understand. She's young, Igor. What does she know of all this? She knows Natalia left, and you're upset."

"Upset." Igor shrugged. "That sounds like I've spilled red wine on a white tablecloth. What's the proper word when your life is suddenly rendered meaningless?"

"Do you want to tell me what happened?"

Surprisingly, Igor found that he did want to tell him. He had to unload this burden before the enormous weight of it crushed him, so he told Levin the whole sorted story. Levin, a true and understanding friend if ever there was one, didn't judge either party, he didn't offer unsolicited advice, he just listened.

"So what are you going to do now?"

"I don't know. Everything I'd hoped and planned for is gone." He pulled his knees up and rested his forehead on them. "I am adrift, anchorless."

"Oblonsky would tell you it's time to raise your sails and let the wind carry you."

"I suppose, but I'm hoping the sea will swallow me up." Igor crawled back to his bed and slithered back under the covers. The sanctuary of his bed and fluffy comforter would be the only thing that would swallow him up at the moment.

"What can I do to help?"

Igor was drained and done talking. "Turn out the light in the hall when you leave. I can still see light under the door."

"Will do." Levin turned to go.

"Levin?"

"Yes?"

"Thank you."

"I'm here if you need me."

The telling of the tale was more exhausting than he could have imagined and as soon as Levin left, he drifted into a dreamless sleep. He was awakened in the middle of the night as the grandfather clock in the hall chimed two and he found his little brother Ivan wriggling into bed with him.

"Ivan, what are you doing out of bed?"

"I thought someone should be staying with you. Sis said you have a heart problem."

Igor grunted what would have come out of a laugh if he had the ability to laugh at the moment. "You could say that. I suppose you know that Natalia is gone."

"I hear people talking. Mother is very angry with her." He paused, unsure what Igor's reaction to that would be and not wanting to upset him. "I liked her." His childish whisper had a calming effect.

"I loved her. But maybe I never knew her." The conversation was getting too deep to be carried on with a little boy, but Igor was oblivious and rambling to himself.

"Can I sleep in your room tonight? I miss you."

"Sure."

Igor wrapped his arms around his little brother, still such an innocent in the world. "Don't let anyone do this to you, Ivan. Don't' be blind. Don't be manipulated. People will steal your soul if you let them."

"I won't." Ivan promised childishly without the slightest notion about what he was vowing.

Igor awoke the next morning with a sense of needing action. His brawl with Konstantine, talking to Levin and then with Ivan was cathartic and he felt healthier. It was just breaking dawn and he eased out of bed to let Ivan continue to sleep. He looked back at his brother, so innocent and looking like a cherub with rosy cheeks and a face without pain. He was suddenly aware that he hadn't eaten in three days and was ravenous. He padded downstairs to the kitchen and began to pull out whatever was in the vicinity, gnawing like a bear on leftover chicken and beef from yesterday's dinner. He tore into a loaf of bread as well, smearing it with a ton of soft cheese and washing it all down with milk chugged straight from the container and half hoping his mother walked in to see such a breach of etiquette. He'd love a good row with her about now.

He looked around at the kitchen of his youth that possessed so many happy memories of family life, but now it made him sick to be a part of it. Natalia had lied to him yes, but the very life he lived made that lie necessary. What a farce it all was. And now they would try to marry him off to someone he didn't love. The best case scenario was Sasha Malfoy, and while she would probably be a hell of a shag, she could never replace Natalia. No one could replace her. He was sick of being pushed around and told what do to and what to think. It was completely against his nature and it was remarkable he ended up in that situation. No more. He made his decision right then. Without bothering to clean up the mess in the kitchen he went upstairs to bathe and pack.

When he returned downstairs he found his parents lingering over the breakfast table, his siblings dirty dishes still uncleared from the table. It was a familiar scene, his father reading the paper and his mother perusing some gossipy correspondence. They didn't look up, didn't even notice him. Irritated, he dropped his rucksack on the ground loudly causing them both to jump.

"Well," his father smiled causing Igor's stomach to churn. "It's good to see you up. Come join us son."

"No." He waved off the invitation briskly. "I'm leaving."

His mother slouched in her seat and the smile quickly faded from his father's eyes as he noticed the broom in Igor's hand and the packed bag. "I see. Where are you going?"

"Far away from here," Igor responded flatly.

"When will you be back?" Asked his mother, a futile question.

"I won't." Igor glowered at his father who he held responsible for it all.

"But University!" His mother whined which incensed him.

Igor rolled his eyes and chuckled. This woman had no concept of how he felt. "Look at me, mother. Do I look like I'm ready for that? I want a new life. I detest this one."

"Running won't help."

"It won't hurt."

"Where will you go?" His father asked him.

"What does it matter?" Igor picked up his bag and turned to leave. His father stood and extended his hand to his son. Igor looked at it for a moment, then glared at his father before turning to leave. Before the door shut behind him he heard his mother begin to weep again.

His father slumped down in his chair. "I shouldn't' have told him." He shook his head.

"You had to. She was using him."

"I should have asked her first. Perhaps if she would have confessed. Perhaps if she went to him first rather than me interfering…"

"She'd still be the same conniving gold digger that ruined my son."

"Who ruined her?"

_AN: So everyone is a victim of society and their own bad choices at the moment. Poor Iggy. Do you remember that scene from the "Sex & the City" Movie when Big stands Carrie up at the alter and she just hides out in a dark room until Samantha has to come in and feed her. That's how I picture poor Iggy. He wears his big heart on his sleeve while Nat just becomes harder. Next chap to come in a few days hopefully. Thanks to all my new readers latelyJ You guys make my day! Please leave some reviews to keep this poor author motivatedJ_


	47. Chapter 47 Mama Told Me Not To Come

CHAPTER FORTY SEVEN

Mama Told Me Not To Come

The following morning Natalia awoke just as the train was grinding it's wheels to a halt in the Hogsmeade/Hogwarts station. She was groggy with a heavy head after the vodka from the night before and although she'd slept nine hours, she still felt physically exhausted. The specter of her broken hearted Igor crept back into her mind. What must he be doing right now? What must he be thinking? She wanted to write to him and explain. Everything had happened so fast, her life gave away like an avalanche that she was now buried under. But what would she write? She could tell him nothing without violating the despicable vow and endangering her life. More than likely he wouldn't believe her anyway and the realization of this cold reality made her feel more hopeless than ever. She needed something to numb her pain and her first thought was Mme Rosemerta's bangers and mash. The idea of comfort food was enough to motivate her into dragging herself out of the sleeping car and off the train.

As she stumbled off the train she found Oblonsky chivalrously waiting for her on the platform. "Good morning, Natalia. Glad to see you're not too worse for wear this morning." He smiled gently at her and once again his mannerisms reminded her of her beloved, having the opposite affect than what he'd gone for.

She merely groaned her response for she was not feeling particularly social this morning. A fully belly of comfort food and a soft bed were all she wanted.

"May I walk with you to The Three Broomsticks?" He smiled nervously at her. It was curious to see him so jittery, but she knew the reason and found it sweet and so made a better effort with her manners.

"That would be lovely, Headmaster Oblonsky." She mumbled mechanically as she'd heard her Slytherin girls mummer so often when they were politely insincere.

"You're not a student anymore," he admonished softly. "You're an adult. Call me Nik."

She had no desire to call him 'Nik'. The very thought made her nausea increase. Using his first name was overly familiar and slightly creepy, but her spine was weak and so she relented.

"Thank you…Nik."

It was merely a five minute walk and the summer morning was glorious but she could not enjoy it. Oblonsky was chatty enough to hold up both ends of their conversation as he rambled on about the weather and other trivial matters. He seemed to understand her and did not press her. He was also not put off by her inability to join in and for that she was grateful.

As they entered The Three Broomsticks, the familiar smell of sausage wafted through the air and finally Natalia felt she was home. The place was quiet, even more so for an average summer morning when school was out. Natalia could hear the soft clinking of utensils on plates and the rustle of activity in the kitchen. Rosemerta was pouring tea for an elderly couple when they entered. She had a lovely figure with the curve of her hips accentuated by her apron. She pushed a stray strand of wavy blond wisps behind her ear and turned to greet her patrons. The moment she saw them she broke into a warm smile.

"Natalia, Nik, what a wonderful surprise." Natalia noticed a rare blush creeping up her neck when she locked eyes with Oblonsky. She hugged Natalia briefly, but her warmest lingering embrace was reserved for Oblonsky who closed his eyes blissfully when she held him tightly. Rosemerta seemed to remember herself and broke first. She seemed slightly embarrassed when she turned to Natalia. "And where is your handsome fiancé?" She asked, unaware of the hell that had recently unleashed itself.

Natalia couldn't answer. She clenched her jaw tightly, slowly shook her head and looked at the floor.

"They're no longer together," she heard Oblonsky whisper mercifully.

"Oh, my dear." Rosemerta rubbed her back slowly and tilted her head to look at her face. "What happened, sweetheart?"

It was too much to explain and so she didn't try but remained purposely vague. What was the use in sharing all the sorted details? "We were too different. Everyone was right, I just should have listened. It's my own fault."

Rosemerta looked disapprovingly back at Oblonsky seemingly laying blame for his former student's conduct. "I'm afraid that's a story as old as time," she remarked, but still looking at Oblonsky who's face softened while his eyes seemed to plead with her.

"I don't want to talk about it." Natalia sniffed.

"Of course not." Rosemerta pulled her close and rocked her back and forth in a motherly fashion, for they had always had a kinship, being from similar situations. "How about I have cook make you a plate of bangers and mash big enough to put you into a food coma? Would you like that?"

Natalia sniffed and nodded her head like a child. Without a word she walked over and flopped down on her favorite couch near the unlit fireplace. Though it was summer, she felt chilly and with a wave of her wand ignited a softly glowing flame in the fireplace. It was comforting to watch the flames.

Rosemerta turned angrily back to Oblonsky and accused him in hushed tones. "What did he do to her?"

"I don't know." He frowned and reached for her hand. "She won't tell me details and it's none of my business."

"It IS your business." She snatched her hand back and shook her finger in his face. "He's your little prodigy but then I guess that apple isn't falling too far from the tree if we consider your record."

"Shhh, don't." Oblonsky whispered softly and gently took her hand again. This time she didn't pull it away and allowed him to pull her closer. "I've only been away from you for a week but I can't take it, Rosie. It's too difficult to be away from you again. I'm not going to give you up this time."

Rosemerta, hard as nails, rolled her eyes at his cheek. "Don't come in here with that romantic foolishness," she hissed dismissively. "Go home as you always do. You can stay tonight if you want but after that you must go."

"Not without you. Not this time. I want you to come with me." His voice was soft but Natalia could hear him from where she was and watched with rapt attention.

"Are you mad? I can't walk away from my business."

"Sell it. I have plenty of babki and you won't want for a thing. I can't let you stay here with that maniac running about with his henchmen. I want you safe...with me." He grazed her lips softly with his own. "Say yes."

"It's not that simple, Nikoli. This is my life. What does it matter if the ministry or someone else is in power? My life doesn't change. I will be here renting rooms, serving food and playing therapist to the barflies. You don't need to rescue me, I'm quite all right."

"But you see I am the one who must be rescued. Don't send me back to my life alone. I need you. I feel alive when I'm with you. My blood feels warmer, my eyes see clearly, even my mind is sharper. What are you getting out of all this work besides money? Isn't there something more? Don't you want something more? You say it's not simple but it is. It's so simple." He slid his hand under her hair around the back of her neck and pulled her lips gently against his for a gentle kiss, before pulling slightly back and whispering, "so simple."

Rosmerta's arms wound round the back of his neck and the intensity of their kiss increased. Natalia watched in spite of herself. It was so romantic and despite her hard exterior and current state of bitter heartbreak, she was still a sentimental romantic. So she sat watching like they were the latest Jane Austen variety of remake until Oblonsky scooped her up and carried her upstairs. His witch offered no protest and Natalia knew Rosemerta would be leaving with him post haste.

Natalia sighed forlornly and wondered what would happen to her now. For if the business shut down she would be unemployed with no prospects. It seemed a crime to shut down something that was such an institution in the world of Hogsmeade and Hogwarts. Why this pub had been in operation long before Rosemerta owned it. There must be some way to keep it going. Then she got an idea. Why couldn't she buy it? With the money from Mr. Karkaroff and what she had left from what Abraxis had paid her, she had more than enough for a down payment and some capital improvements. Then she could make monthly payments from the profits each month.

Excitement energized her body for the first time since Igor had dumped her. This was just what she needed to get over him, a big project. All the better for this one as it would give her a future if she played her cards right. She wasted no time going back to Rosemerta's office to snoop through the books to get an understanding of the financial situation. Tomorrow she would make the offer and finally be on her way to financial stability and independence. Never again would she depend on a man for her livelihood. She would make her own way in this world.

It was August fifteenth, what would have been their wedding day and Igor was barely holding it together. On the outside, no one would have suspected for he portrayed every inch the confident playboy gallivanting about Europe, but inside he was emotionally destitute. It was intolerable and he sought an escape.

"Karkaroff!" A familiar voice called his name and he squinted through the hookah pipe haze to see who it was. He spied the LeStrange brothers and Bella Black, now Bella LeStrange lounging on a couch with a water pipe on the table in front of them. They motioned him over and though he didn't particularly care for them, he was curious about the hookah and what it might offer him.

He was distracted by his personal problems and didn't even consider that this was anything but a chance encounter.

"Rudy," Karkaroff greeted him heartily and warmly, after all he was still a familiar face. "I thought you'd all be home preparing to return to University."

"No. Sit with us." Rudy gestured toward the empty settee across from them. "No more stuffy classrooms for us." He leaned over and gave Bella a kiss. When he pulled away she lurched forward slightly, obviously wanting more.

"I'm surprised Bella's family approved of you ditching school and choosing to travel. They were always rather conservative as I recall."

Rudolphus leaned back and stretched his long legs out. "Bella and I no longer live by those rules."

"No?"

"No. We make our own rules." The very thought seemed to excite Bella for she began to stroke his thigh brazenly.

Igor was tremendously backed up and watching was making his balls tingle already. He was also intrigued by the conversation. "What do you mean?"

"All these rules," Lestrange gestured in a circular motion with his hand. "All these meaningless social and moral conventions. Why most of these have only recently crept into our culture as the muggles infested our world."

"True. True" Igor nodded momentarily distracted by a lovely girl who had just sat down next to him and was already encroaching on his personal space. "My shaman ancestors lived a freer existence. Most did not marry and family was loose if it existed at all. You wouldn't know it now the way my mother obsesses over it."

"Precisely! Mine did as well. Why should we dishonor our heritage leading some castrated muggle charade?"

Igor smirked as the girl began blowing in his ear and goose bumps trailed down his neck. "Well, you're the one recently married, not I." He looked pointedly at this potential conquest as he spoke.

Bella giggled and her husband smirked. "Phfft! Your family will have you married to Malfoy's sister or someone just like her if you don't stand up for yourself. Me? I'm lucky for Bella has a similar outlook on life as I. Our marriage is…unconventional."

Igor's heart began to race as Bella crossed to sit next to him, wriggling between him and the edge of the couch and also pushing him closer to the girl who was now stroking his upper thigh. He was glad his trousers were too tight to allow his hard on to be obvious. When Bella rubbed his stomach just above his belt he nearly ejaculated.

Rudolphus laughed low with a growl at his friend's confusion. "Oh don't worry, Karkaroff. Bella and I allow one another many freedoms. Don't we now, my love?"

"Yesss," she hissed. "Many." Her fingers traced his belly again slipping just inside his belt and he began to squirm. He was sure he was getting sucked into something dangerous but the dark side of him was ready to embrace it. This would help him forget. He would fuck one or possibly both of these women tonight, hard, fast and thoroughly. He had to get it out of his system.

"It's rubbish you know." Lestrange continued.

The temporary denial of Igor's desires as he was forced to engage in political discussions was only getting him hotter. He felt a bead of sweat drip behind his ear and down his neck, and then groaned softly when the girl beside him licked it off.

Lestrange shifted in his seat while watching the women closely. "Rubbish. All these rules, these disgusting muggles infiltrating our world. Sure you see that now."

Igor was beginning to agree with him. Better to live like this. It felt natural to him. To hell with these conventions. It was their world. For years he'd struggled to fit someone else's idea of who he should be, his parents, his headmaster, even Natalia nagged him into being ordinary. He thought it would be wonderful to be free of all that and live on his own terms. So he allowed himself to engage in all that the evening was offering to him. Never finding Bella particularly alluring, he turned his attention to the other contestant.

The witch sliding up beside him was dark haired like Natalia but looked Greek in coloring and features. She spoke no English, Russian or French so he was at a loss on how to communicate with her. However when she started groping his balls she was speaking his language and vocal communication would be merely a hindrance. She was aggressive and stroked him openly until he groaned in spite of his best effort to restrain himself in a public place. Bella cozied up closer on his other side and brought the hookah pipe to his lips. As the other continued to stroke him, she gently turned his chin to her and rubbed the smooth edge of the pipe across his lips.

"Inhale and hold," she whispered and he could feel her breath on his cheek. It was not right for her to be so close to a man that was not her husband and he had no desire to toy with another man's witch. Rudolphus sat across from him and merely nodded while a smile curled up on one side of his lips, not granting permission but approving of the current situation. Honor no longer being a priority in life, after all look where it had gotten him, Igor embraced the deviance of the moment. He moved his hips into the stroking hand of Greek Natalia and turned his head towards Bella.

"That's right," she cooed sliding just the tip of the pipe into his mouth. He inhaled deeply and held it all the while meeting her eyes. She breathed with him, tilting her chin slightly higher and inhaling as he did. "It enhances your pleasure. You feel more of her hand now don't you?"

"Mmm," he groaned as his head seemed to float higher above his shoulders. This was exactly what he needed to forget, a head full of drugs, a gorgeous witch on his knob with another talking dirty to him. Greek Natalia seemed to get jealous of Bella for she threw a leg over him, straddling him in public and crowding Bella out of the way. Igor's head was spinning under the spell of pot and sexually aggressive women. He heard Rudolphus guffaw. "Bella, you minx, get over here. If you like to watch you may but let me touch you while you do."

These people had no shame but there was something very freeing about the way they behaved. There were no limits. He thrust his hips upward while grabbing Greek Natalia by the arse and pulling her into him. She moaned breathlessly and whispered something undiscerenable into his ear before getting off of him, standing and taking his hand. She smiled seductively and pulled him to a stairway in the back of the room that led to private rooms upstairs. Igor was powerless to resist her, not that he wanted to.

When they we out of the room a ghostlike apparition emerged from the shadows and sat down in the seat Igor had just vacated. "Well done Mr. And Mrs. LeStrange. Where did you find the girl?"

"Ah, Lucius, I hope you enjoyed watching that as much as I did. Brothel down the street," Rudolphus laughed. "I knew he'd like that one. His type definitely. If you like we can go back and find another to your own tastes."

Lucius snarled at the very thought. He thought the current whore was his type as well but didn't say so in front of Bella who wouldn't miss an opportunity to rat on him to Narcissa. "With all the rubbish he just inhaled he should be easy to manipulate."

"Yes, yes." Rudolphus was no longer thinking about their little project, now more interested in Bella who was feeling randy after her warm up with Igor. "Won't take much to get him to see things our way. A few days of this life and he will be begging to join us."

Lucius was encouraged but knew he wouldn't be off the hook with the Dark Lord until Karkaroff was marked for life. "What about the prostitute? You know their unreliable."

"Relax. Bella's imperious curse is second to no one's, but just to be on the safe side she speaks no English."

Upstairs Igor found himself unsteady on his feet. He wobbled to the bed and flopped down with a light head. If he squinted, at Greek Natalia he could nearly pretend it was his former lover. If only he was slightly more inebriated, he could trick himself into believing it was her.

Igor lay back on the bed in the upstairs room and watched Greek Natalia slowly undress. A forlorn smile crossed his lips as he remembered the first night less than a year ago that Natalia undressed in front of him in her tiny room above The Three Broomsticks. Though this room was better furnished, it did not hold the same charm for him. The corners of his mouth drooped downward and he stared vacantly at the naked woman in front of him. She sensed his displeasure and muttered something in her throaty whisper. She went over to her bag and rummaged for something. He appraised her backside which was rounder than Natalia's but he knew it would not feel as silky under his palms. She found what she was looking for and returned excitedly to him holding a small pot of something. She opened her container and dipped her wand in then offered it to Igor.

It was a banned substance called Black Dragon. He'd heard of it before but only those on the fringes of society in St. Petersburg touched it, musicians and philosophers dabbled in it. They were also some of the ones that preached against some of the very things Lestrange was talking about. He hesitated, unsure of what would happen. An athlete all of his life he had eschewed such dangerous substances for many reasons, health, reputation and his mental state but he wasn't sure he cared about those things any longer. She pushed it toward him, dangling the tip of her wand over his forearm as she held his wrist. "Yes?" she asked seductively.

And in a pivotal moment of weakness he succumbed. "Dah." He allowed her to trace the vein in his arm with the gooey black substance. It absorbed quickly into his skin leaving a telltale trail, but he thought little of it for he was immediately overtaken by a sensation of warmth and comfort that he hadn't felt since Natalia was gone. And much like the first time he'd kissed her, from that moment, he was hooked.

AN: Oh no! Igor caves to the dreaded peer pressure. Please know I do not condone or encourage drug use in any fashion but it's something that happens to many people in the world—even good people make poor decisions. This will be leading him down a bad path for quite a while.


	48. Chapter 48

CHAPTER FORTY EIGHT

Bad Blood

Lucius trailed along behind Donald Cuthbertson, the current Deputy Undersecretary for the Department of Magical Law Enforcement's Regulatory Committee, a dubious title by most people's opinion, as he was chiefly in charge of enforcing anti-muggle policy that was proliferating through the otherwise impotent Ministry. As they toured Gringotts, Lucius mind wandered away from their duties and recalled the last time he was in his family vault and all the riches they possessed. His brief internship with the Ministry had been tedious trumped up affair, however it was the Dark Lord's wish to plant him as a spy so he could receive and plant information.

"You're a slippery young man," the Dark Lord had whispered as he rubbed his hand down the back of Lucius' robes. "I do love that about you," Voldemort had hissed into Lucius' ear with the same sexual ambiguity that always made his arse clench. Fortunately they had been interrupted and Lucius' virgin and very heterosexual bum was safe for now.

Today they were supposed to be investigating the unpopular new credit policies the Ministry had required of Gringotts and how they were being enforced. Under the new edict anyone with a drop of non-magical blood would be denied credit. The goblins were not happy about the new rules, feeling it would be bad for business, and though they followed the rule to the letter, they were openly hostile to the Ministry. The goblin they were speaking with was particularly angry about the one loan application on his desk, growling and pounding his little fist as he railed away.

"Just look at this one," he growled, bearing his pointy teeth. "Solid existing business, the applicant has worked many years in the establishment, good student, excellent references, a generous down payment, everything in line and here I am forced to deny it based on nothing but blood status. The worst of it is that she might actually have the proper status to qualify, but due to orphanage records we can't determine her status one way or another." The little goblin had worked himself up into quite a lather and the spit that flew out of his mouth as he spoke increased in direct proportion to his annoyance.

"Orphanage?" Lucius asked his first question of the day, his interest now piqued by the possibility of this applicant being Natalia. "Who is the applicant?"

The goblin growled again and shuffled through his paperwork. "Never heard of her…Smith. Yes, Natalia Smith. Why do you know her?"

All eyes were suddenly on Lucius but he was smooth as ever. "Yes," he replied nonchalantly though his heart was throbbing. "Yes, I do know Miss Smith. She was one of my housemates in Slytherin. Charming girl, may I ask what she wants to buy?"

"The Three Broomsticks, some little dive in Hogsmeade." The goblin seized the opportunity to snoop, for he loved inside information, particularly social gossip. "Why would a Slytherin want to be associated with such a greasy place? Why isn't she going to University somewhere?"

Lucius shrugged and kept his features arranged placidly. "If I'm not mistaken she was engaged to the son of a very wealthy wizard, but apparently he broke it off."

"Certainly doesn't help her credit," the goblin spat with distain.

Lucius felt a stab of guilt at the thought of Natalia alone in the world because of his deceit and acted on the impulse. "As I recall there was a confirmation of her pure blood lineage in school by a blood test."

"Dumbledore doesn't allow those tests," the goblin snapped for he sensed he was being conned.

"Not as a rule you are correct, however, I seem to remember a very grave health issue that required that test to determine her treatment plan. She was confirmed to have no muggle blood. Mme. Pomfrey confirmed it. So you see there should be no issue."

"Produce the proof." The goblin sneered at him.

Lucius wasn't prepared to be questioned but he was such a cool and practiced liar that it mattered little. He would not be outdone by a mere goblin, whom he believed to be of an inferior race. "I'll speak with her immediately, then we may put this nonsense to rest."

Lucius now had several problems. For one thing he had no proof and the goblins were notorious for spotting even the most clever forgery and false documents. He'd also put his position on the line by sticking his neck out for her. If he could not produce proof and was found to be lying for a muggle, his position within the Dark Lord's ranks would be diminished. If he confessed that he had done this because he desired her, which was the only bit of truth in this dilemma, it would surely get back to Narcissa and that would be the end of them. He sighed heavily as he lay in his bed that night unable to sleep and plotting his way out of this mess. _This is what I get when I think with my knob. _But he was a twenty year old wizard with an overactive libido and a frigid fiancé who was under a mountain of pressure, so his knob was quite frequently leading the way with his brain lagging far behind.

His knob was still doing the thinking and Natalia was the chief subject of the moment. He was wretchedly horny as always and his mind wandered back to his favorite sexual memories of her, the night in the Slytherin common room when she'd jacked him off despite the possibility of someone walking in, the time he'd given her the necklace and she'd ground against him in the closest thing to consensual sex he'd ever had. Briefly his mind drifted to the one and only time he'd been inside her, but he pushed that thought away, still ashamed of how he'd forced himself upon her. His cock throbbed mercilessly and there was only one way to silence it. With a flick of his wand he opened the drawer next to his bed and levitated his favorite issue of "Wanton Witches of West Ham" over to his bed and turned to his favorite moving picture of a very buxom and very naked witch dancing around her broomstick in a manner that the broomstick had not been designed for. The pages were sticky but he managed to open them. The witch in this picture had a haircut similar to Natalia's and so he always made full use of it when he fancied a wank. He breathed heavily and then levitated a pot of lubricant out of the drawer. A soft paintbrush popped out of the pot and began to paint his Johnson lightly as he groaned under the teasing. When he was thoroughly painted with the slick substance he grabbed his cock and began to stroke himself, slowly at first but then quickly building to a frantic pace before his seed shot across his legs.

As always afterwards he felt ashamed of himself, but not so ashamed that he would get rid of either the lubricant or the pornography. His ejaculation did however accomplish his goal which was to relax him and clear his head and within then minutes of his orgasm, he'd formulated a plan to get himself out of this mess while saving Natalia as well. He looked at the clock and it was only ten-thirty, time enough to accomplish his mission under the cover of night. Quickly he dressed and apparated to Hogwarts. Although the gates were closed, he knew enough secret ways to get in that he had no problem gaining access and sneaking up to the infirmary.

Mme. Pomfrey had just seen to the last student in her care and was busy in her office reshelving reference books and healing potions when Lucius knocked on the open office door. She turned quickly and appeared predictably puzzled upon seeing him. "Oh, why Mr. Malfoy, what brings you to Hogwarts at this hour? I'm sure it can't be anything good."

Lucius smirked. She was still the same disagreeable old battle axe he remembered from his school days.

"Always direct, just as I remember you," he drawled in a vain attempt to be charming. "I require something of you."

"Well, I certainly didn't think this was a social call and you've never done anything to help anyone but yourself so I knew it couldn't be to offer service. Well, out with it."

Her comments stung as few people had the courage to needle him, but he was about his business and pressed on. "I need you to provide a written verification of Natalia Smith's pure blood status."

"Phfft!" Mme Pomfrey rolled her eyes to the ceiling. "You know I don't believe in such nonsense. Be off with your ridiculous and racist requests."

But Lucius was undeterred and in his most sinister voice responded, "I'm not leaving without it."

"Then I shall have to speak to Dumbledore." She immediately went for the door but he blocked her path. Though she was a formidable woman, he was much larger and even in his youth, intimidating when he chose to be.

"Oh I don't think so," he whispered, for it would still do no good for anyone else to hear them. "If you do I shall have to tell him what you've done."

"Done?"

"You performed an abortion on Natalia."

Mme. Pomfrey's mouth gaped wide at such an accusation. "Absurd!"

"Really? She was pregnant, but didn't deliver while she was at school."

"How dare you assume I had a hand in that!" Pomfrey's tone was indignant but he saw her hand shake and knew he had her. Still she protested. "She had a miscarriage."

"A miscarriage?" Lucius hissed in his most patronizing tone as one eyebrow arched arrogantly upward. "So then you must have a record of it."

"No," she admitted reluctantly. "I didn't tell. She would have been expelled."

"No record? How irresponsible." He clicked his tongue in admonishment. "By your actions one might be led to believe that you condone this sort of behavior."

"How do you even know about the pregnancy?"

"She told me." He leaned against the wall and crossed his arms.

"Why would she tell you anything?"

"Because she knew I would help her. Now woman, you will provide the verification of her pure blood status or I shall go straight to the Headmaster and The Daily Prophet. You'll be sacked before you can say 'moral conundrum'."

Mme Pomfrey hesitated, seemingly searching for a way out but then marched angrily over to her desk and removed a form. She completed it hastily and scratched her signature at the bottom. She handed it to him. "Now get out! I've never liked you."

Lucius examined the document, then blew on the ink to dry it before carefully placing it in his breast pocket. "Good evening, Poppy." He smirked, no longer feeling the need to address her with the proper respect. It was almost too easy, but he would remember the ease in case he needed something in the future.

The following morning he dressed early and was at Gringotts the moment they opened. He showed the document to the goblin who seemed pleased and made a copy of it. Lucius insisted on keeping the original for safe keeping. Natalia may need it to protect her from harm if things went the way Lucius thought they might. When he received confirmation that the loan and sale would be approved, he went straight to The Three Broomsticks to see Natalia. He was excited to be bringing her good news for a change.

He entered the establishment to find it quite busy at the tail end of the breakfast rush. Natalia was confidently directing staff with understated authority and the place bustled with a warm and friendly vibe that put him at ease. Natalia's hair was pulled up into a loose knot and a few wisps that were too short to be secured framed her face which was rosy from much activity. It was a far cry from the sleek and sexy witch he'd seen on the beach not so long ago, but this was the girl he fell in love with and his heart warmed at the sight of her even though he knew she would not feel the same.

She was chatting with an elderly lady and pouring her tea. When she finished she turned with a smile but the moment she saw him her smile disintegrated and her eyes narrowed. She walked behind the bar and began to busy herself wiping it down. "Come to gloat?" She spat the words out like they were bitter. He did not detect the fear he normally saw in her eyes when she encountered him. Today she was angry which in his eyes only made her more beautiful.

"No." He made an attempt to sound kind but it was not in his nature and sounded patronizing. "Just to check on you."

"Phfft! Check on me?" She shook her head and continued to wipe the bar furiously. "Well, as you can see I'm fine. No thanks to you I might add."

There was no way she could have known he had a hand in Igor leaving her, so he feigned ignorance. "Are you? I heard what happened with Mr. Karkaroff."

Natalia glared at him. Her jaw tightened and he regretted being so heavy handed. Too much time with the crude company he kept as of late was having a bad effect on his manners.

"I suppose you're about to point out that it's none of my business and you are right. I'm sorry." Again he tried to sound sincere and again he failed.

"Are you now?" she replied archly.

"Yes." He hoped that honesty would improve his delivery. "Well, yes and no. Honestly I never thought he was good enough for you but I hate to see you unhappy."

Natalia rolled her eyes. "You're full of shit, Lucius."

He laughed low and deep, enjoying her wit which hadn't changed a bit. "Indeed. Well spotted." He thought he saw a hint of a smile, or was it only a smirk at the corner of his mouth. Encouraged, he pressed on. "Rumor has it you've applied to purchase this establishment."

"It's not a rumor but you are a little behind the times. I've been denied by Gringotts. Apparently your prejudicial ilk have pushed through a regulation forbidding credit and new property ownership to those not of pure blood status."

Lucius smiled, his heart nearly bursting with what he was about to tell her. "I'm afraid it is you that's behind the times, my dear." He handed her the letter authorizing the loan and title transfer.

"What's this?" She asked before snatching it out of his hand.

"Read it and find out."

She did as he watched her carefully. Her eyes focused on the words and for a moment she was confused before she broke into a big smile. It was gone in a second and she quickly stuffed the envelope in her apron pocket. Her eyes flashed when she looked at him causing something to stir deep inside him. "You had something to do with this didn't you?"

He merely nodded while watching her frown deepen.

"Then I'm not taking the deal."

"Natalia, be reasonable."

"I am being reasonable. I see where being indebted to you gets me. It's brought be nothing but misery to be under your thumb. I won't continue to live that way." She handed the letter back to him but he did not take it.

"I'm not doing this to have you under my thumb."

"Bullocks!" She spat through gritted teeth.

Lucius looked over his shoulder, not wanting to be noticed. "Charming language."

"How DARE you interfere in my life again!" She was now beginning to shout and heads were turning in their direction.

"Hush! Let me tell you exactly how it happened. Shall we go upstairs and get away from prying eyes?"

"Oh you'd love that wouldn't you, you wormy little pervert."

Lucius sighed in annoyance while maintaining his trademark air of nonchalance. "If you are quite through with your adolescent grandstanding I would like to convey the factual chain of events to you. Or perhaps you'd like to continue to make speeches."

She crossed her arms and glared at him while tapping her foot. "Fine. Spill."

"I would like you to join me in a cup of tea first."

"Oh for Merlin's sake."

Lucius grinned a bit enjoying the play with her as always. "No tea, no talk." He sauntered over to the couch by the unlit fireplace.

"Ugh!" She used her wand to whip up a pot of chamomile tea which was his least favorite. He was sure she knew it too. She came over to the couch and set the tray down loudly on the hearth. He eyed the pot until she relented and poured his tea. He took the cup and made quite a show of taking a sip and expressing his pleasure. "Smashing," he remarked with a raise of his eyebrows.

"Are you going to tell me what happened or not?"

He smiled at her, still finding her features enchanting. "Yes," he replied softly and then explained all that had happened and what he had done on her behalf. When he finished he was still confronted with skepticism in her eyes that he knew was well deserved. "Natalia, I know I've wronged you severely. I know you loath me as a result. My point in doing this is to give you a fighting chance, and to keep you safe."

"I am quite safe. I don't need your protection." She cut him off not wanting to face the truth in his words.

"Things are changing, Natalia. You've been out of the country for a few months so you may not have heard everything, but mark my words, blood status is going to figure prominently in every aspect of our world. Like it or not, this document verifying your blood status will be invaluable to you one day. It may even keep you alive."

"It's not real, Lucius."

"They will never know. Just hang on to it. If you never need it well then all the better, but if you do you have it."

"I guess it can't hurt."

"No. And I will vouch for it's authenticity if need be. I am well connected."

"That's a matter of opinion."

"At the moment it's a matter of fact. You would do well to remember it."

She seemed to make a great effort to recompose her face into more hospitable lines and the thought crossed his mind that she could be quite the diplomat when the situation warranted it. This was a relief to him, for it was a very valuable survival skill that he himself possessed.

"You are full of surprises as always, Mr. Malfoy."

His heart soared even though he wasn't sure she was complimenting him. Perhaps there would be more to their relationship over the years. Maybe it wasn't completely over as he had thought. No matter what came he was promised or more like shackled to Narcissa, but if he was mindful of his actions, perhaps he could have Natalia again. He would do nearly anything to regain her affections, but wanted her only on his terms. He would have to be clever and not rush things just yet.

"I think we are on a first name basis by now, Natalia."

She smiled and laughed softly. "Are you hungry?"

Lucius could not contain his glee at being asked to remain, just a few more precious moments in her presence. "Famished."

"I have a wonderful smoked salmon this morning but most people's pallets aren't quite so evolved in this neck of the woods."

"Sounds wonderful." He couldn't remember when he'd passed a morning as beautiful as this. He'd helped her, without conditions and she'd welcomed him. It was an odd feeling but one he enjoyed. She brought him a large breakfast and sat with him while he ate. The talked of quidditch and gossiped about former classmates.

In time the conversation began to drag and he took that as his cue to leave. As he reached the door, she took his hand gently. "Thank you, Lucius," she whispered.

Thank you, after all the wrongs he had done to her, here she was thanking him, and a wave of unidentified emotion choked his response. He nodded slightly, and then made his way back home.

AN: So Lucius can be nice…when he thinks he might get something out of it. This might be as good as it gets for him. Next chapter we will see how old Igor is making out with his Death Eater friends and drug addiction. Thanks to all the reviewers, followers and facebook budsJ Hope everyone is surviving on the East Coast of America after Frankenstorm. Man, that was a doozie. Here I am enjoying a warm coffee while I watch the cold wind blow outside! Love to you allJ


	49. Chapter 49 Nothing Else Matters

CHAPTER FORTY-NINE

Nothing Else Matters

Natalia worked frantically for weeks getting The Three Broomsticks into what she thought was the proper order for her new establishment. There were so many things she'd wanted to change when she worked there while in school, but it wasn't her business at the time. The first Hogsmeade weekend for Hogwarts students was two weeks after the start of term and she tried to make as many changes as she could before then. For one thing she fired a very surly bartender. He was a crotchety old fart that had worked for Rosmerta for years and needled Natalia incessantly when she was forced to work with him. Immediately after taking over it became apparent that he had a problem taking orders from a young girl, whom he considered to be inferior. It wasn't long before she was at her wits end with him and he was gone after the first week.

She then made some changes to the exterior façade, which was old and in need of some tending. First she used a powerful water spray spell to wash the front, which immediately made the place look fifty years younger. Next she replaced the sign in front and changed the arrangement of the broomsticks on it. The old sign had three broomsticks fanned out with handles gathered together at the top. She rearranged three new, actually second hand but new to the sign, in a triangular pattern and hung a large lantern in the center to provide a warm and welcoming light. It was a huge improvement and the new arrangement reminded her of the old story of the Three Brothers she'd heard in her first year of Hogwarts. She'd always loved that story and the new arrangement served to mark this place as more uniquely hers. While the interior was also in need, there was not enough capital to complete renovations there, so she settled for a thorough cleaning and the addition of more candlelight which brought warmth that it had previously lacked. Next she added red and black plaid flannel tablecloths to all the tables and finally the place started to look more welcoming. When she stood back to admire her work, she was proud of herself for what she felt was the beginning of a comeback for her. The good feeling was unfortunately short lived as she wished more than anything that Igor were there to share it with her. She shook her head to get rid of the thought of him but still yearned for someone with whom to share her small victories. Sasha was abroad in America and even if she was here, Natalia was not certain that she would appreciate something as humble as a redecorated pub. Severus would, but she hadn't seen him in so long and missed her snarky sidekick. Enjoying her new freedom as an adult, she decided to pay him a visit in Spinner's End.

Her fist thought as she approached his doorstep was that his home could also use a good power-washing spell, but she squelched that ill-mannered idea and knocked on the door. The air in the neighborhood was thick with fog and smog from the factories nearby, and an unnatural chemical smell hung in the air, giving her a headache within moments of arriving. No wonder he was so grouchy. Who wouldn't be living in such a place?

When no one answered, she knocked again, louder this time. The door flew open so fast it made her jump. Severus looked far sterner than she remembered. His forehead puckered in deep creases and he did not smile or give any indication that he was happy to see her.

"Hi, Severus."

"Hello." He said flatly.

"It's been a while." She smiled hopefully at her old friend, anxious for a confidant now that Igor and Rosmerta were out of her life.

But Severus remained cold and curt. "Has it?"

"Yes, months since we've graduated. I've missed you."

One eyebrow shot halfway up his forehead but other than that, he did not react and the conversation became more awkward by the second.

Natalia was used to him being anti-social and although annoyed with his surly demeanor, she expected as much was not deterred. "May I come in?"

"Suit yourself." He turned his back on her and walked into his house into what passed for a sitting room. It was small and the furnishings were old and shabby, however the room possessed a properness about it that wasn't completely intolerable. It reminded her of what a grandparent's house would look like. He stalked into the room and turned to face her. "Sit." She got the feeling he wasn't accustomed to hosting and obeyed, resting on the davenport. He sat in the faded wing chair across from her but perched stiffly on the edge, which did not help to ease the tension. No one else appeared to be in the home and the only sound was the nagging tick tock of the clock on the mantle, which seemed to put more pressure on an already peculiar interaction.

Natalia cleared her throat nervously and started to wish she hadn't come. "How are your parents?"

"Mother's dead," he snapped with no emotion in his expression or even his eyes.

"Oh." Natalia was taken aback and ashamed that she had not known this. It made her feel terribly guilty not to have been there for him during such a difficult time. "Severus, I had no idea. I'm so sorry. Was she ill?"

"No. It was…sudden." He drummed his fingers impatiently on the arm of the chair he was sitting in and looked out the window, expressionless.

Obviously he didn't want to discuss it yet, so reluctantly she moved on. "And your father?"

"He'll be dead from drink within the year." Severus let out an exasperated sigh, the first display of emotion he'd let slip. "He's living on the street now which befits him." Again he gave little detail, merely stating minimal facts.

"Oh that's terrible," Natalia remarked for lack of something better to say.

"Not so terrible." Severus shrugged, starting to appear more like himself as he fiddled with a frayed section of fabric on the arm of the chair.

She decided she was pushing him too much. Severus was loath to discuss anything about his family even in better days, so she changed course. "I've been back for a month. Didn't you get my owl? I'd hope you would have come and see me if you did. The pub looks great and business is good."

"I've been busy," he snipped again.

"Oh? Doing what?"

"Nothing that concerns you." Again he shut her out.

As much as she wanted to be sensitive to what was happening in his family, she was beginning to have enough of his attitude and decided to cut through his rubbish. "Severus, are you angry with me?"

"No. Why do you ask?"

"Well you didn't come to visit me and now you seem like you aren't very happy to see me."

His demeanor changed immediately and he began his attack. "Why did you think I would come, Natalia? You haven't wanted much to do with me since you took up with that Russian." He paused letting his heated words sear into her. "Now I hear he's cast you out so you're back on my door step after you abandoned our friendship."

So now the truth was coming out. This was actually reassuring to her as she always preferred being direct. His opinion, while absurd, gave her a clear understanding of his insolence. "Abandoned you? Pooh! You sound like a silly old woman. I did no such thing."

"You certainly did. Oh don't trouble yourself, I can handle it but it's truly nauseating to see you come crawling back when it suits you." He sneered at her but she did not grace his outburst with a response and so he kept pressing her. "So what happened with the Suave Slav? Rumor has it he found out about Malfoy."

"Where did you hear that?"

"Does it matter?"

She sighed heavily with resignation. It was folly to think such a juicy bit of gossip wouldn't be readily circulated. "I suppose not. Yes. Abraxis told Mr. Karkaroff."

"I suppose you're here to have me tell him what I know. Well you can forget it."

"That's not why I came. There is so much water under the bridge and once he gets something into his head, there is no talking to him. I still kills me that he was so quick to believe the worst. But the better question is why would you refuse me? It's nothing to you."

"Lucius is like my brother now and I won't betray him."

She snorted and gaped openly at him. "Brothers? That's a laugh. He'd screw you over in a heartbeat and what about our friendship? Doesn't it mean anything to you anymore? I suppose not. You forgot all about our friendship after you took up with that band of hooligans."

"Do not speak ill of them." Severus voice boomed angrily across the room.

"I will speak very ill of them." Natalia was fighting mad now. "They are no good, Severus. Surely you can see that now. You're smarter than all of them."

"Check your tongue. We are growing larger and stronger every day."

Natalia rolled her eyes to the ceiling. "Ha! Mental, all of you!"

"It may interest you to know that Karkaroff agrees and is joining us."

Her heart stopped and her blood suddenly went cold. "What?"

"Yes, he's as good as marked." Severus raised his chin haughtily as he frequently did when he felt he was winning an argument.

"I don't believe it." Natalia shook her head violently and raised her hand indicating she did not what to hear any more. "He was firmly against all of that racist rubbish."

"Well, it seems his experience with those of questionable backgrounds has influenced his view of the world."

"Questionable backgrounds? You mean me?" She cried indignantly.

He shrugged as one corner of his mouth curled into a sneer.

She ignored his insult for desperation quickly swept over her. "Severus, I'm begging you to do something to stop him. Please tell him then. Tell him everything you know."

"What I know? What I know is that there is no stopping this process once things are set in motion. Give him up, Natalia; he belongs to the Dark Lord now."

Igor paced manically up and down Knockturn Alley. He didn't want to return to this dreary place again but he was out of Black Dragon and would never make it through the night without a steady supply. He had been partying with the LeStrange brothers, Regulus Black and a few other followers of Lord Voldemort. They were entertaining company and he was considering making the alliance permanent, asking loads of questions about their work and philosophies. His questions were never answered fully as they did not completely trust anyone who did not carry the brand they wore. Life with them had been exactly as Rodolphus had said; they lived by their own rules and took orders from no one. They we're frequently involved in duels, which he relished and never shied away from. It made him feel good to take his thinly repressed anger out on others. Then there was the constant stream of women in his bed. His mates were all young and handsome, and witches of all kinds were anxious to bed the swaggering Lotharios. Igor bedded every one of them with masterful efficiency, his sexual appetite more ravenous than ever, he couldn't get enough. The only thing more overpowering than his libido was his eternal chase of the dragon, and that was what led him here tonight.

The dealer he was told would be here was not and his legs were beginning to seize and kick for lack of the black goo. He leaned against the damp brick wall and raked his fingers roughly through his hair out of frustration.

"Getting antsy?" his connection finally arrived and Igor started at the sound of his oily voice.

"Where the hell have you been?" Igor sneered once he'd composed himself, for it wouldn't do to appear the least bit weak in front of such a sleazy character.

"Miss me?" The skinny wizard with a closely shorn head eyed the studly looking Igor up and down.

Igor ignored him and reached into his pocket bulling out a pouch of coins. "Fifty galleons."

"Not so fast." The dealer held up his hand to halt the transaction and did not take the money. "The ministry is really cracking down on illegal substances lately." His voice lilted mockingly. "I've had to take additional precautions and review my supply chain."

Igor knew full well where this was going but didn't give an inch. They bartered for everything in his country and he never backed down but rather enjoyed the challenge. "Yes well, your business savvy is impressive but immaterial to me. Hand it over." He once more thrust the bag at the dealer.

"One hundred galleons," the dealer replied shaking his head with false regret.

"Forget it. I can't pay you that."

Igor's lie was met with a snicker. "You're rich as shit so don't give me that. It won't hurt you one bit."

This transaction was already taking too long and Igor was becoming more and more anxious. He had to have a hit quickly and would stop at nothing. "Look, I can give you the rest of the money tomorrow. I just don't have it tonight. Or you could just give me half. Please, I have to have it now."

The dealer giggled like a little witch, which made Igor's stomach churn. "Oh how the mighty have fallen. You don't remember me do you?"  
>"No. No I'm sorry you have me at a disadvantage."<p>

"I was the manager for the Hufflepuff quidditch team. Don't you remember?"

He did not, but he lied. "Yes. Of course."

You and your friends played our team and one of your friends flew into me, broke my arm."

"Oh, yes.. I'm terribly sorry." Igor continued to lie as he had no recollection of this incident or this person.

"You weren't at the time. You said...what was it...oh yes...'man up you little poof.'"

_Oh shit_, it was all coming back to him now. "Forgive me," he sputtered, now at a disadvantage and panic stricken at the thought of not scoring any Black Dragon off this loser.

"Oh no. I owe you a debt. You see I was in the closet at that time, very confused and terrified. It's a very shameful thing in my family. After your little comment, I was outed. The reactions from my classmates were…intolerable. I left school. But I don't live by their rules any longer. "

"Good for you." Igor smiled nervously but inside was desperate to return to a more productive discussion. "Look perhaps we can work out a deal for the dragon."

"Expelliarmus!" Before he knew what had happened, Igor was disarmed and not liking where this was going one bit.

"0h I've got a deal for you right here," he said, one hand stroking himself through his trousers while his wand remained turned on Igor.

Igor's mind raced in a dozen different directions. He remembered the dagger he always kept in his boot but knew in his drug deprived state he couldn't reach it before he was hexed. He would have a small window of opportunity if any to avoid what he thought was coming.

"Get on your knees," the dealer demanded as he gestured downward with his wand.

"You're not my type," Igor smirked as every muscle in his body tensed. Igor barely got the words out before a painful but quick curse brought him to his knees.

"You're my type. I always fancied you. Just make this worth my while and I'll continue to give you what you need."

Igor tried to move but his knees were cursed and stuck to the ground and he felt a wave of nausea overcome him when the man stroked his hair and pulled his face into his crotch. He struggled and was able to turn his head away but then a sharp blow landed across his skull knocking him to the ground. The curse waned as the man began to open his trousers and exposed his cock. Igor was able to quickly grab the dagger in his boot and when his assailant pulled him up by the lapels so Igor's face was in his groin, he was surprised by the dagger, stabbing him violently in the belly. He froze but did not go down. Igor twisted the knife and violently shoved it deeper into his belly until the man slumped backwards.

Igor crawled away frantically. His heart was throbbing in his chest at the horrific site before him. His hands we're shaking and his legs began to kick erratically reminding him how he got into this mess in the first place. He crawled frantically over to the man and reclaimed his wand. He felt his neck for a pulse but there was none. He began to shake all over. This was bad, so bad. While he hadn't used an unforgivable curse, this was still beyond forgiveness. The lifeless eyes were wide open and looking right at him. Igor used his wand to close them and tuck the man's member back into his trousers. He was panicked but even in this state, desperately needed a hit.

"Accio, black dragon."

The drug flew out of the man's pocket into Igor's hand and he wasted no time infusing it into the vein of his arm. He slumped back onto the ground as the warm feeling came over him. He massaged his arm allowing the substance to absorb more quickly and gazed up at the stars. Orion was in the sky, the brave hunter that he had always admired as a child. He was so far away from that boy now, addicted, estranged from Natalia and his family and now a murderer. The dead man had been right when he said 'Oh how the mighty have fallen,' for Igor knew his fall was quick and hard. He was unsure how long he lay like that before he was jolted out of his thoughts by the pop of apparitions. The Lestrange brothers appeared with Regulus and Lucius.

Igor was too deep in his drug fog to be irritated at the sight of Lucius. He merely stared at him, considering him and thinking that he could see why Natalia would have fallen for him. His long hair and fair skin created a luminous effect, almost a halo with the moon behind him. He was tall and impeccably dressed in a sleek dark green jacket that was made of very rich looking fabric. While Igor and the others favored more outlandish styles, which reflected their rebellious natures, Lucius was always well manicured, perfectly groomed and attired in clothing that was cutting edge yet still classic. Igor lay there with everyone gawking at him like a train wreck.

Lucius clicked his tongue in admonishment. "Well, well, well, what have we here? This is a fine mess."

Regulus scowled at Igor and walked over to the dead man. He checked his pockets and found identification. "Shillingburg. I remember this bloke from school. He dropped out as I recall."

"Obviously he had lofty career ambitions." Lucius smirked. "Well you didn't use the unforgivable curse, there's far too much blood. I see you attack people as sloppily as you attack your dinner."

Igor's head lolled sideways as he heard the words but didn't fully process them. One thing was certain though; he was in big trouble. He made an effort to collect himself. "I have to dispose of the body." He mumbled, still barely comprehending that he had ended someone's life.

Rodolphus snorted. "Oh no, his carcass stays here." He raised his wand to the sky. "Morsmordre!" Green lightning shot out of his wand and into the sky into a cloud and suddenly the cloud began to take on a terrifying shape.

A haunting skull took shape causing Igor's heart to race. Then a large snake came out of the skull's mouth and in his altered state Igor knew it was coming straight for him. He scrambled to his feet nearly falling down again twice. "What the hell is that?"

"Oh Rudy, you always were a show off." Lucius remarked drolly. "So much for being discrete. Gentleman, I believe now would be a good time to pay our Lord a visit. Perhaps he can help our friend out of this terrible predicament. Take my arm, Karkaroff."

"Where are we going?"

"Does it really matter?"

"No."

Igor was brought into a cavern on the side of mountain. The wind howled all around them and no one spoke a word as they entered the mouth of the cave. Wand tips illuminated and they walked purposefully onward pausing only to duck from the occasional bat that flew at them. As much as Igor loved animals, bats were the one creature he could not tolerate. His brother, forever jealous of his wavy locks told him bats would get in his hair and lay eggs, and this phobia stuck with him into adulthood. He was so busy dodging bats, hunching his shoulders and looking upward for the next attack that he didn't know how far they walked, but eventually they rounded a corner and the cave opened up into an expansive living space.

There were cushions and expensive looking rugs scattered about with a large table full of food arranged near a warm fire. The Lestrange brothers went immediately for the food. Bellatrix who had been lounging on a cushion with the Dark Lord seemed to start when she saw her husband. Her eyes darted back to Voldemort who nodded, affirming that she may go to him. The exchange struck Igor as odd but he did not dwell on it, for another witch grabbed his attention. She was short-haired and slight of build and the familiar sight both comforted and terrified him. The witch was quickly joined by Lucius, who ran his hand from shoulder to bum as she turned to greet him. It was Greek Natalia and finally Igor began to realize there were no more chance meetings in his life.

"They tell me you've killed a man," Voldemort hissed coming closer.

"Yes, my lord." Igor was forthcoming for there was no use to lie for Voldemort would have no qualms about invading his mind to seek the truth. The Dark Lord was tall and one of the few that could stand eye to eye with Igor. His red eyes met Igor's unflinching gaze as he circled him like a predator who knows he has the upper hand. A lone bead of sweat dripping down Igor's cheek betrayed his nerves but he knew wiping it away would only attract attention to it and as he worried about it another one escaped on the other side.

"They'll find out you know. Eventually they always do."

"They don't always catch you." Igor winced the moment the words passed his lips.

One corner of Voldemort's paper thin lips curled up. "Interesting statement you make. It implies that you think I have committed crimes that The Ministry fails to prosecute. Do you not have faith in the upstanding members of that organization?"

Lately Igor had considered all of government an annoyance as they were interfering with his lifestyle choices. Bars and brothels were raided, his dealers were hassled endlessly and the aurors liked to harass anyone they thought might be involved in the dark arts, which lately included Igor. "I believe them to be out of touch with the will of the people. They have their own agendas and place far too many restrictions on our freedoms," Igor meant every word and his bold delivery betrayed no fear though his heart was racing.

"Yes," Voldemort grinned and nodded thoughtfully. "I have always found you to be insightful and," Voldemort leaned closer and whispered into his ear "exceedingly persuasive. People look up to you, you know." He circled Igor again. "Tri-Wizard Champion, Quidditch star, charismatic and a bit of a womanizer if what I hear about your reputation is accurate."

As Voldemort spoke Igor made an assessment of his life and all it held for him, for he knew exactly where this conversation was going. He had little prospects these days since he left the Karkaroff fold in search of greener pastures. He was too angry at his family to consider them and suppressed his happy memories under the crushing weight of resentment. He cared little for school or employment as little interested him these days other than pleasures of the flesh or the insistent craving for Black Dragon of which the continual search was becoming a full time occupation. It would be a relief not to have to constantly worry about his next hit. He did not mind the company of his new friends. Regulus in particular was enjoyable. The only one he abhorred was Lucius who was no eyeing him with interest presumably curious about his decision.

As Lucius eyes him the witch stroked his arm and looked longingly at him. "What a fool she is," thought Igor. Lucius' reputation as a womanizer increased daily yet did nothing to diminish his number of conquests, or so Igor thought. Surprisingly the witches never outed him to his fiancé but protected him with their silence just as Natalia had.

Igor's stomach twisted at the thought of Natalia and the loyalty she felt for Lucius and instantly his weak resolve began to crumble, the stones of his determination soon lay in a pile mixed with unanswered questions. "Why did she protect him? What had she been after? Did she ever love him? Was it all a lie? Was it his background? Could he ever be worthy?"

"I can meet your immediate need of protection from prosecution. All of this unpleasantness will vanish."

Igor gulped nervously. In his haze he hadn't exactly considered the consequences of his actions. He'd been too preoccupied with chasing the dragon to realize that if caught Azkaban was a foregone conclusion. He listened carefully as the Dark Lord continued.

"And you wouldn't have to go slithering about in alley ways to acquire substances that those closed minded bureaucrats should legalize anyway. We have a ready supply of whatever diversion might please you at any given time, potions, money and of course, witches."

Igor's ears perked up again at the thought of female companionship, but he knew all these things would come with a price.

"What are you proposing, my lord?" As if he didn't know, Igor stalled.

"Join me. I will give you life and a purpose again. You will live as you please, consume what you wish, do as you please, and fuck who you want. I could use someone with your charisma. You're a natural leader and so persuasive. I want you out in front."

Lucius took his eyes off Igor and turned to the witch before him and pulling her in for an uninhibited kiss that was so possessive he knew that he must also be imagining Natalia. Murderous rage boiled inside him but as much as Igor loathed him, he also admired him for what others thought of him and how he was able to live freely without consequence. And this jumbled up drug induced logic brought him to the decision he would forever regret when he responded, "I would be honored to serve you, my lord."

Lucius bit down on the insides of his cheeks when he heard the words that he felt responsible for pushing Karkaroff to say. He closed his eyes briefly and said a silent prayer, "Forgive me, Natalia."

AN: Well our hero has done it now. Poor Igor is a wreck and making really bad decisions while Natalia gets lost in her work. Then there is Severus, all snarky, but don't you just love him like that? He's just HOT! I might have to write another Snape-fic...Watched POA the other night and was chatting about it with my lovely Beta Ella and we got all revved up when he said "Turn to page 394."Oh enough of him. And then there is Lucius...sigh, all tortured and misunderstood. I think they need a group hug...or other stuff:)

Thanks to all who have favorite the story this week and left kind reviews. You guys are awesome! Please be so kind as to leave your thoughts:)


	50. Chapter 50 Big Shot

CHAPTER 50

BIG SHOT

In the years that followed their estrangement Igor and Natalia led vastly different lives. Igor became a favored pet of the Dark Lord and the sanitized face of the movement. In addition to exuding charisma, he was a passionate orator seducing pureblood wizards into the service of the Dark Lord and witches into his bed, or cupboard or stall in the loo. His unquenchable sexual thirst was epic and Voldemort took pride in Igor's conquests as if they were his own, encouraging the others to behave similarly. His weakness for women, his open heart, his increasing dependence on drink and drugs however made him a liability in the Dark Lord's eyes, despite his fondness for him. As was the Dark Lord's, practice with all of his followers, he kept certain things from him particularly the naked truth such as torture, rape and murder, and Igor became a misinformed pawn, albeit one with a very public profile. Igor questioned little, for the sex, intoxicants and intrigue filled his life and kept him occupied. But in rare moments of clarity or peace, his mind would drift back to his Lavender Girl.

Natalia found that her purchase of The Three Broomsticks worked out better than she could have imagined for she was a natural business witch. She was supportive of her staff, finding they responded better to kindness than the barking of orders that was Rosmerta's style, and so they were always willing to go the extra mile for her. When school was back in session she catered to students on Hogsmeade weekends and hosted staff on the weekends. Within six months she'd made back her down payment and was even able to buy up a struggling Honeydukes. When a scowling Severus walked in one day to announce the bookstore was in trouble she bought it for a song and quickly turned that enterprise into a success.

Her days were filled with the business of life and she finally felt comfortable financially and able to relax around people. She was a popular bartender, a practiced good listener from years of being too shy to speak. The teachers, particularly Slughorn, remembered her fondly and visited regularly. Even Potter and his ilk frequented the establishment. They were lively as ever and slightly more mature now that James and Lily were married. She found that now that she didn't have to watch them torture poor Severus, who rarely showed his face at all, they could be quite pleasant. The only hazards were the persistent advances of Sirius Black. But truth be told, he was growing on her. His devil may care outlook and bawdy sense of humor reminded her of Igor, as did his floppy dark curls and outlandish fashions, which only the most confident could pull off. But he wasn't as tall as Igor, or as burly, or as intellectual and his voice wasn't as deep and he lacked the sexy accent of Eastern Europe. Still he was handsome and attentive and Natalia knew very well when he looked at her as he did that she was always about six shots of fire whiskey away from ripping his clothes off and giving him the night of his life. It had been a long time since she'd been with a man and some nights she felt her resolve crumbling, so she wisely avoided liquor all together much to Sirius' disappointment.

While Igor knew nothing of her life in those years, finding it painful to think that she moved on, she was subjected to regular accounts of his sex-ploits as he had become a favorite muse of rookie reporter Rita Skeeter. Much as she hated the woman's tabloid type of reporting, she couldn't not read it, but the more she read, the more her heart ached with worry for him.

Not long after Severus informed her of Igor's soon to be sworn allegiance the headlines read, "Hogwarts Dropout Found Dead as Dark Mark Looms in the Night Sky." Though no one was ever implicated, she found the timing suspect. The Dark Mark in the sky was something that marked the murder as a conquest. She hoped to Merlin that he had nothing to do with it but the feeling that he might have been involved gnawed away at her.

"Well look at this will ya', Nat?" Roxanne the waitress tossed the tabloid at her over the bar one morning with a smug smirk. Natalia's eyes raced over the piece written by Skeeter who was obviously smitten with her Igor, really who could blame her. "Irish Cursed as Russian Rockets Soar to Victory. Former Russian Standout Karkaroff Owns the After Party," the headline read and Natalia scanned the article's first half that reviewed the quidditch match until she got to the part about Igor, then she read every word carefully.

_The post match festivities would have been uneventful if it weren't for the presence of former Russian quidditch star and Tri-Wizard Champion Igor Karkaroff. The tall, dark and handsome wizard entered the room with an air of conceit that had many witches clamoring for stories of bludgers and quaffles. His eyes were passionate as he spoke of blood purity and the preservation of our culture. Let's just say many of the witches at the party were enraptured with his…persuasive orations. He is rising quickly in the circles that matter and this reporter will make a firm commitment to her readers to find out what makes this longhaired Lothario tick._

Natalia nearly vomited when she read the last couple lines. It didn't take a genius to figure out that persuasive orations had little to do with his political speeches. But what else should she expect? A man like Igor wouldn't be without a witch if he chose not to be. Roxanne was eying her with curiosity so she quickly attempted to compose herself so as to avoid the gossip of the help. "I don't know why you waste time reading such rubbish. Garbage in, garbage out, why don't you pick up a book once in a while?" Natalia brushed by her and began to sweep in front of the hearth.

Natalia busied herself for the rest of the day, not only going about the normal chores of running a pub but also cleaning out a broom closet, weeding a section of the back lot to prepare for a garden and then going down to Honeydukes to reconsider the merchandising floor plan. The changes she wanted to make there took her the rest of the evening and well into the night, for she didn't return back to her little room over the pub until well after eleven that night. Work was her salvation when it came to forgetting her troubles and she desperately needed salvation after that bit of news. However, her salvation was short-lived and the moment she laid her head on the pillow to seek sleep, all the hurt, resentment and grief came flooding back in large tears. She buried her face in the pillow and sobbed until she had nothing left and sleep found her just after midnight.

A month went by and each day Natalia picked up The Daily Prophet with some trepidation, terrified of reading more about Igor that would disturb her but knowing she couldn't just not read it. Over parents weekend the staff was gearing up for a busy night. Natalia rose very early that morning and her preparations were complete when she settled down for a cup of tea at her desk to rest before the rush stated. She took a sip and picked up the Daily Prophet and nearly choked when she read, "My night with the Suave Slav". Her lip began to quiver but she could not stop herself from reading some sleazy tart's detailed account of her night with Igor. She spared nothing, accounting for every sordid detail and Natalia was shaking and biting her lip so hard by the time she finished reading it that she nearly drew blood. She took a deep breath but her exhale was ragged as she was barely able to keep herself together. _Keep it together, you have much to do today. Keep yourself together._ She rose and looked at the ceiling, shaking her wrists but not knowing how that would help. Finally she composed herself enough to go back out of her office but when she opened the door she was stunned to see her entire staff about the kitchen, staring at her looking embarrassed and not saying anything. They all knew and it was only the start of what would surely be a humiliating day. She exploded. "What the bloody hell are you all looking at? Get back to work before I sack the whole worthless lot of you!" She pushed her way out of the room leaving them in stunned silence, for she never addressed them like that.

Mercifully she was too busy to wallow in self pity and was able to focus on the running of the pub while checking in with Honeydukes, which was now more successful under her direction. The patrons were chatty and even schoolmates, underclassmen when she was there, who had previously barely known who she was, were now engaging and friendly now that she was proving herself to be a success. However, her forced role of extrovert was exhausting and at the end of the night as she lay her head down her heart ached for her Igor. How could he be the same person she was reading about? It was in such contrast to the ardent lover he had been with her. Now he was with another, or rather, many others and she was alone.

"Brawl in Brightwell", was the headline that confronted her on a cold December morning when the snow was deep and blowing outside which would surely mean a slow day for her. She took coffee in her room and sipped the steaming mug as she read about Igor's latest exploits. Apparently he had been speaking at a political gathering. His talk entitled "Muggles, Dumber Than We Ever imagined" was probably designed to provoke a reaction and cause a fight. She remembered how he would mischievously make off hand remarks to get people riled up when he wanted a fight. But back then his remarks were on the other side of the argument. No doubt his experience with her had turned him against anyone with inferior blood status. She read the article once and looked at the picture for a long time. Over and over she saw the photo of a man attempting to hex Igor, who moved aside only to tackle the poor bloke and send them both tumbling to the ground. She sighed heavily and tossed the paper aside though she no longer cried over the articles of him. She was all cried out over Igor Karkaroff, or so she thought.

In February the headlines were taking a more sinister tone; "Ministry Bans Wolfsbane Potion. Dangerous beasts to be exposed and jailed." This wasn't the first item of this nature for the Ministry was restricting many liberties these days. This one was particularly disturbing for not only did it present a public safety issue if werewolves were denied potions to control their transformations, but the Ministry was now treating the disease like a crime. While she understood the fears of people, she disagreed that they did not have a duty to humanity. She wondered if there were more to the story than that insipid Rita Skeeter was telling.

Her answer came when Sirius and Remus staggered in the following night already pissed and wanting to get more so. The normally reserved Remus found his way to a table of attractive witches and began to charm effectively with the courage of drink under his belt. Sirius as usual took a seat at the bar so he could chat up Natalia while she worked. "Hello, love," he greeted her with his breathy voice that women adored. It served to put them at ease and make them nervous at the same time. "You're looking lovely as ever this evening, my darling. Please tell me you've finally come to your senses and realized I can give you everything you've ever wanted." He cocked his head to the side and grinned at her mischievously.

She was used to his cheek and was getting better at giving it right back to him. "I highly doubt it unless you have a chocolate tallywacker that ejaculates galleons." She'd heard Roxanne the waitress say that to someone not long ago and made a mental note to use it on Sirius whom she knew would appreciate it at the first opportunity.

He cocked his head to the other side and didn't miss a beat before responding. "Why it just so happens I do," he answered with a straight face. "Shall we go to directly to your quarters or would you prefer the loo?"

She laughed, enjoying having someone she could say nearly anything too without offending them. "Suave as ever I see. It finally seems to be rubbing off on your friend there." She nodded to Remus then set about pouring a butter beer and handing it to Sirius.

Sirius suddenly turned serious and took a big gulp of his beverage. "He's a bit out of sorts." He lowered his voice and leaned across the bar closer to Natalia. "I'm sure you've heard the news."

She leaned in as well and whispered so Remus wouldn't hear. "Yes, it's terrible. What is he going to do?"

"Well he and I have never been known to follow the rules if we don't agree with them. I've already lined up someone willing to brew the potions and we can provide them on the black market. I'll make sure my mate is taken care of, but there are so many others."

"That sounds dangerous."

Sirius shrugged, again reminding her vaguely of Igor. "Better than the alternative."

"I suppose so. It's a risk you have to take for those you care about."

"Yes. You'd be surprised how many people are willing to help. Only I haven't been able to find someone to supply the ingredients. Wolfsbane requires close attention."

Natalia looked at Remus who was gazing desperately and one of the women as if he needed someone to love him desperately at the moment. It reminded her of Severus but also herself. It wasn't easy to be different. "I'll grow it for you. I have a courtyard in the back no one goes there but me and a fence conceals it. There is plenty of space too, we can grow enough to help others as well. No one will know."

"Are you certain? It's quite a risk. No telling what could happen if we are caught."

"I'm sure." A thrill went through her for she loved taking action as it gave her a sense of control, which she craved particularly since Igor left.

"Excellent." Sirius slapped his hand down on the bar. "But it's actually another project we need your help with."

"We?"

"Yes, my ahhhhh….associates and I have become aware of another segment of the population that could soon be at risk and this is far worse than werewolves. It involves a cause that I feel may be near and dear to your compassionate heart. You know I've always found you to be very sympathetic and kind to all that…"

"Enough flattery Sirius. What do you want?"

"You've heard of these disappearances?"

"Who hasn't?"

"Well some of those people left behind children."

"I've heard, terribly sad."

"Well, not all of those children have other family to take care of them and some that do, well they are scared for their own and not willing to take on another child."

"What about the orphanage where I was raised? It wasn't perfect but it was good enough for me."

"Was it? Was it really good enough? I've met the muggles that run that place. They aren't bad people but they don't understand the special needs of magical children. They are also aware of the shift in our cultures and afraid to house these children. As a society we can do better for them, don't you agree?"

Natalia sighed for she knew what was coming. "You want me to take them in."

Sirius pursed his lips together and swirled his drink around in his glass. "Well…yes."

"How many are we talking?"

"There are four infants."

"Four! And infants to boot! Are you insane? I don't know anything about infants, and four? I have a business to run. As you can see I'm very busy." She waved her hands around for emphasis.

"Natalia, there's no one else. Please you know this is right and look how effective you are at managing large projects. With the proper assistance it will be fine."

"Proper assistance? I hope you don't mean you! Proper assistance indeed," she huffed indignantly. However Sirius did not give in, merely sat there looking at her with his big brown eyes making her feel more guilty by the moment. He was right. She knew he was right but what a tremendous undertaking. He was right about one thing, she was a good project manager and she could hire some proper help for there were many people looking for work right now.

She began to think out loud. "I suppose I could house them in some of the upstairs rooms. I have trouble keeping them rented anyway. But I can't do all of that by myself. I'll have to hire someone very trustworthy."

"So you'll do it?"

"Yes." She rolled her eyes but with a broad smile. "Oh why do I let you talk me into such things?"

He raised his glass to her. "Because it's the right thing to do."

It was absolutely the right thing to do and something to give her a little more meaning in her life. For while she enjoyed running her businesses, no matter how much success she had, it would never fulfill her on an emotional level. While it was enjoyable and occupied her mind, she still felt slightly vacant at the end of the day. It didn't give her the joy she began to feel as she painted the walls in the room she was to use for a nursery a soft pink for the first little girl to arrive, or when she shopped for linens and nappies and teddy bears.

On the evening the little girl was to arrive Natalia fussed about the room rearranging the blocks on the top of the bookcase and neatening up the stack of nappies. She had already vowed to herself to give these children the best start she could so they would feel cared for and not have the same hang-ups that she carried with her to this day.

It was nearly midnight when she started at the loud rumble of Sirius' flying motorbike outside the window. "Merlin's Beard," she muttered. "Why can't that show off ride a broom like everyone else?" She peeked out just inside to see him land and then raced downstairs to let them in. When she opened the door her heart nearly melted when she saw the charming young rake of a man cradling a little pink bundle.

"I can't believe you brought her here on that contraption. That heap would wake the dead."

"Oh she loved it, as all witches do. Fell asleep as soon as we were airborne."

Natalia took her gently from his arms smiling broadly as she took nestled her head in the crook of her arm. She couldn't resist putting her nose to the child's head and inhaling deeply the addictive scent of a baby. "Ah, she smells wonderful," Natalia gushed.

"Ah, yes, I'd forgotten it was like heroin for housewives, that baby smell."

"What's her name?"

"Katherine."

Natalia nuzzled her nose against the sleeping baby's cheek. "No worries now, Katherine. I'm going to take excellent care of you."


	51. Chapter 51 Good Times Bad Times

CHAPTER FIFTY-ONE

Good Times Bad Times

Natalia settled down into her bed with a heavy sigh. Taking care of four infants, running the pub and keeping one eye on her other two businesses was exhausting, but the sense of purpose she experienced made her feel good. She'd had the children for six months and was pleased to see them thriving and growing. The pub staff all pitched in, setting up little high chairs in the kitchen and giving them tastes of this and that as they worked. Natalia had hired Roberta, an elderly but very sweet old woman to come in around bedtime and sleep in the nursery with them. It was the only time Natalia had a moment's peace.

Enjoying the peace, she sipped some chamomile tea and was finally able to open the morning addition of The Daily Prophet and scan it for tidbits of Igor. However, for weeks there had been little news of him except for a photo here and there with sleazy witches; the flavor of the week, draped over him. Still she couldn't stop looking, even if it did make her feel like rubbish. Compounding her sick feeling was the increasing attention the paper devoted to the upcoming nuptials of Lucius and Narcissa. After his recent kindnesses she was beginning to have a soft spot for him but would never let him know. He would have to work much harder to redeem himself before she could forgive all his trespasses. Still, when she looked at how forlorn they both appeared in their engagement photos, she felt sorry for them.

She was gazing at Lucius handsome face and thinking about some of the occasions long ago when she felt attracted to him when she heard a noise outside the door downstairs. She glanced at the clock, it was almost midnight. More than likely it was just some drunk wanting a nightcap. Normally she would ignore it but she didn't want them to wake the children, so she decided to throw on a robe and go downstairs to shoo them away. She grabbed her wand just in case. One couldn't be too careful these days.

As she crept down the stairs to the door the knocking increased in volume and urgency. "All right, all right. Don't get your knickers in a twist." She flung the door open and hissed at them. "We're….." she paused, shocked by who she saw. "Closed."

Lucius, unshaven, drunkenly disheveled but still drop dead handsome leaned against her doorframe smiling devilishly and she knew immediately this little encounter was about to get complicated. He wore a black dinner jacket and his white shirt was undone at the top with his tie hanging loose over his neck. "Hmmm, twisted up knickers. I love it when you talk dirty. How about a night cap for ole' Lucius?"

She was glad to see him but knew that you couldn't allow him an inch of latitude or he would push for more, particularly in his current state. "I told you we're closed," she said with a frown.

"I've not come as a patron. This is a social call. It's my bachelor party." He made a move to step in the door but she pushed him right back out.

"Then go find some tarts to celebrate with. I'm not serving what your ordering tonight." She turned her wand on him and he put his hand up in surrender.

The smirk disappeared from his lips and his eyes became serious. "I don't want prostitutes or liquor. Actually I've already had my fair share of them tonight." He raised his eyebrows.

"Ugh," she grimaced. "You're disgusting!"

He composed his face to a more business like expression. "Yes, you've mentioned that before. How about some tea and conversation?"

"Conversation?" She arched her eyebrows. "Is that what you're calling it these days?"

"Natalia, please." He suddenly looked serious.

Although she had a nagging feeling that this was a bad decision, she was desperate for adult conversation with someone on her intellectual level, so she relented. "Fine." She stood aside to let him pass.

He looked around at the establishment as he sauntered in. "Love what you've done with the place. You've become an excellent business-witch. I'm very proud of you."

She rolled her eyes as he flopped down on the couch near the fireplace. "Incendio." He started a fire and warmed his hands as he began to sing or rather mumble a Christmas song. "Chestnuts roasting on an open fire….Jack Frost nipping at your toes."

"Nose," she corrected sharply from across the room.

"What's that?"

"Nose. Jack Frost isn't nipping at your toes he's nipping at your nose." She handed him a steaming mug of tea. "I hate when people get the words wrong."

"Well, I've always had a bit of a foot fetish," he deadpanned.

Natalia burst out laughing. "You never change, Lucius. Even when I'm annoyed with you I do love your wit."

He smiled dreamily. "Do you?"

"On occasion." She looked at him and noticed the sadness in his eyes. "Why so melancholy tonight? It's three weeks to Christmas and only a week until your wedding. You should be happy."

"I don't want to get married to her."

"Then don't," she shrugged. "We've had this conversation several times. Did you come to have it again?"

"Sort of." He scowled and stared into the fire. "Last chance." He smiled and raised his eyebrows naughtily.

"Not happening."

Lucius chuckled softly. "I'm drunk and sad. Can't you spare my feelings for once?"

"I don't lie. Unless for some reason I am forced to."

"No. No you don't. You've changed little yourself. No, actually, you're prettier."

"Lucius, no matter what's happened I hate to see you unhappy. Call it off before it's too late."

He sipped his tea and gazed into the fire. "Really, it doesn't matter."

"It does matter."

"Not really. I mean it's not like I couldn't still find someone. Everyone has affairs. I'll not be lonely, nor will she. Natalia would you ever consider..."

She cut him off before he could finish. "Please don't insult me again by asking what I think you are going to ask me."

"Why should we both be lonely?"

"Because I am not about to sleep with a married man. And besides, I am not lonely. I have a very full life right now."

"Oh?" A shadow crossed his face. "Someone I am unaware of?"

"Several someone's actually."

Lucius lip curled up slyly. "I am shocked but pleasantly so for perhaps you may add me to your list."

Natalia snickered which only served to increase his curiosity.

"I am quite serious. I think you would find me more...fulfilling than these other ones that you refer to."

"Doubtful. Would you like to meet them? They are in one of the upstairs rooms."

Lucius fidgeted in his seat trying to quell the erection that immediately sprang up for in his drunken state he was under the impression that she was inviting him to an orgy. This was well beyond his expectations, and visions of nubile young women and athletic Adonis like men writhing against each other on silk and velvet cushions while white gauzy drapes blew a warm breeze into the room blending with the scent of spiced oils and sex. He gulped and felt his blood grow hot with passion as he nodded his head.

If Natalia knew of his assumption she did not let on. Quite the contrary she took him gently by the hand and led him upstairs. He lagged a couple steps behind her so he was eye level with her swaying bum as they ascended. She took him to the end of the long hallway and he saw the glow of candlelight escaping at the bottom of the doorway.

"Are you ready to see what changed my life?"

"So ready,'" he breathed. She opened the door but his erection wilted as soon as he saw the rooms occupants. Four cribs lined the walls containing sleeping babies and an old crone sat snoring in a rocking chair in the corner. He gathered himself quickly enough to make a snotty comment. "You really should look into some birth control, Natalia."

She giggled and slapped his shoulder lightly. "Shhh, if you wake them I'll put you right to work."

Lucius walked over to a crib with pink bedding and peered at the sleeping little cherub inside. "Who are they?"

"Well this ones name is Katherine."

"No, no, I meant who are their parents? Where do they come from."

Natalia smirked at his comment. After all those years he still judged people by their parentage rather than on their own merits. She knew she had to be selective in what she told him thinking in hindsight it was imprudent to bring him here. What was it about this man that caused her to make so many bad decisions? "They are orphans, taken from the muggle orphanage where I was raised."

"Muggles?" he hissed with distain.

"They aren't Muggles. They are magical but they were left there. I have them here so they can be raised in a magical environment."

"My lord is aware of this, Natalia. He doesn't know where these children are but he is aware that someone is taking them in. Be careful. He is not displeased to my knowledge but that could change. "

"I will." The clock began to chime midnight. "It's late and they will be up early tomorrow."

"May I stay?" He moved closed but did not touch her.

"Neither one of us need the scandal."

"Is that your way of letting me down easy?"

"Yes." She slipped out of the room and closed the door gently after he followed, then walked him downstairs.

When they reached the bottom of the steps he turned quickly towards her with a final alcohol driven request. "I will give the children ten grand if you give me a hand job." He raised his eyebrows naughtily for he was only half joking. "Twenty if we can have it off."

"Phht," she snorted. "I don't need your money any more, Lucius. I have my own."

"It was worth a try. You know the wedding is Saturday."

"So I hear. My invitation must have been lost in the post."

"Would you like to come?"

Natalia shook her head no while pursing her lips.

Lucius slipped his hand around her waist. "How about a kiss for the groom?"

She bit her lip, which he found incredibly attractive. Was she doing that on purpose?

"Not for sale anymore, Lucius."

"Not for sale, but I see you're doing charitable works these days."

She giggled which encouraged him. "Think of it as a goodbye kiss." He watched her process this request. She wanted to kiss him, of that he was certain, but she was struggling internally with the morality of it or perhaps the wisdom of it. He cared little about the nature of the struggle, merely the result.

"Just a kiss," he whispered seductively.

"Yes," she breathed.

He pulled her closed but did not kiss her right away. He looked deep into her brown eyes and she met his with care and misplaced trust. He stroked her cheek with the back of his fingers and was thrilled when this caused her to closed her eyes. She liked his touch. He used his thumb to stroke her lower lip while her eyes remained closed and a soft breath passed from her mouth to warm his thumb. The sight was too tantalizing to continue to resist and he bent his head to press his lips softly against hers gently caressing them with his own. She sighed softly making his angst all the more palpable and increasing the urgency of his kiss ever so slightly pulling her just a little bit closer and sneaking his fingers through her hair but not controlling her lest she reject him again. She responded to his gentle manner by melting against him and ran her hands over his chest, which served to make him even more desperate. He knew he should hold back but he may never have this opportunity again so he seized it by pulling her firmly against him and seeking entry into her mouth with his tongue. She however rewarded him with parting lips and her hands weaving their way through his sleek flaxen hair. Lucius, though admired by many, was loved by none and he groaned heartbreakingly and eased her back against the wall. Surprisingly she did not resist a bit and he felt her breasts heave against his chest as she began to breathe harder. He vowed to take her right there before she changed her mind. His hands moved deftly and untied her robe. He opened it as he moved to kiss her neck and then there was only a thin bit of her cotton nightgown between them.

"Lucius." The sound of his name from her lips encouraged him further and he ran his hand up her thigh and over her bum to find her without knickers. He groaned desperately and began a clumsy attempt to undo his belt. Her hands were immediately on his, which pleased him for it was far sexier for her to do it but she did not. Instead she held his hands firmly. "Lucius, this isn't right."

"I don't care. I want you." He moved to silence her with his kiss but she turned her head sharply and his lips were on her ear. "Please just once. I'll make you feel so good. I want you more than ever. "

"We can't, Lucius."

"Please, I love you. I have always loved you."

"But I don't love you."

"I don't care." He continued to trail kisses along her neck. "No, that's not true. I do care. I want you to love me but right now I just want you to want me."

"I do want you but that's not enough."

"Why not? It keeps this utterly uncomplicated for you." He ground his hips mercilessly against hers. "I will give you unparalleled pleasure for hours tonight and you'll walk away with a smile on your face and nothing more."

"That isn't enough for me."

"What can I do to make it enough?" He was willing to sell his soul if need be for this instant gratification. "How much do you want?"

"What?" She tried to push him off gently but he didn't move.

"Name your price. I have more money than you can imagine and I'm dying to fuck you."

"I don't want your money." She continued to try to move him away.

"A new business venture then. They're starting a new Quidditch team in Edinburgh. I could make sure you get a piece of the action if you give me some action."

Natalia shoved him off hard and he shook his head seemingly coming to his senses. "I'm not your hushed up whore!"

He blinked several times, still dazed. "I never thought of you that way. I...I just wanted you and that was my only hope." He tried to sound pathetic for he was wickedly horny and not one bit above a pity fuck.

"You need to leave right now."

Lucius' anger detonated and he punched a hole in the plaster wall just above her shoulder causing her to flinch. " You little tease. How dare you leave me hanging tonight. Do you get off on that? Well do you?"

She cowered under his rage and began to make what he found to be pathetic excuses. "I'm sorry, Lucius. It's been so long and you look so good but I made a mistake. I can't do this."

"Still not over that retarded Russian rube I see." He was inches from her face gritting his teeth as he spoke with liquor breath on her face while she shook under his wrath. "Mark my words, you foul temptress. One day you'll come crawling on your hands and knees BEGGING for my help and let me warn you; my price will be dear. You'll look back on this wasted opportunity with a mountain of regret and I will be merciless."

His remarks seemed to trigger some resolve within her for she clenched her jaw and raised her chin defiantly. "I hope you have a lovely wedding, Lucius."

Her sarcasm pleased him on some level but he didn't back down. "Just remember what I said, for that day will come and when it does, I will be waiting for you."

Natalia fearlessly rolled her eyes, walked over to the door and opened it, motioning for him to leave. He stopped in front of her gently tucking a loose strand of hair behind her ear then trailing his finger over her cheek before gently raising her chin. "I will be waiting," he whispered before walking out the door.

Natalia slammed it shut behind him and immediately warded it heavily while cursing herself for being so careless. What had come over her? Had it been so long since she'd had attention from the opposite sex that she would become putty in any man's hands? Lucius looked so wonderful and could be so charming but then there was their twisted history. She felt she deserved him to be angry with her, for after she led him on she should expect nothing less. It was a foolish thing to do. She should be glad all she got was an argument. She vowed not to be so careless again as she trudged back up to her room and collapsed into bed hating the life she found so satisfying just an hour ago. Was this as good as she could expect?

The evening of the aforementioned nuptials arrived and Natalia was fortunately too busy with a big crowd in the pub to dwell on the lackluster love life of Lucius. After the dinner rush she'd spent a few precious moments with the children upstairs in their room, which was under a silencing charm to shield them from the noise downstairs. Though it was anything but quiet in the room when they were all awake. All were sitting and crawling and two were beginning to toddle about on wobbly little legs. After Katherine arrived, another girl, Ella appeared and then one evening Sirius brought her two little boys, Curt and Donald. Curt was the oldest but only by a month and the others marveled at his new accomplishments and tried to keep up with him. By nine they were running out of steam and when the nanny arrived, she and Natalia got them ready for bed. They peered out of their little cribs listening to Nanny read their story as Natalia quietly slipped out of the room.

She entered a rowdy scene downstairs; music blasting, people she hadn't seen before we're about half of the crowd. They were dressed to the nines and dancing badly, as a flustered Roxanne buzzed around behind the bar trying to make drinks. "Need some help?"

"Desperately." Roxanne brushed the sweat off her brow and tucked a blonde ringlet behind her ear. "I don't know where all these folks 'ave come from t'night."

Natalia didn't know either. They were an eccentric looking bunch, slightly on the dark side, but no one was making trouble and she was glad to have the additional business as well as the distraction. It kept her mind off Lucius and his farce of a wedding night. They were a lively bunch and ordered expensive liquor and food. She and Roxanne kept them accommodated and entertained.

The crowd thinned out a bit after midnight but then the door burst open with another group of about ten people also dressed to kill but of a slightly edgier and far drunker attitude. She thought she recognized the first two men but couldn't place them. Then Regulus Black entered and she approached the door to greet him.

"Regulus! Why it's been ages!" She beamed as she approached him and then was even more thrilled to see Severus walk through the door. "And Severus! Merlin's nightgown it's like a homecoming!"

Severus made no expression but marched directly over to her and took her firmly by the arm. "Come with me."

"What? What's this about?" She nearly stumbled as he pushed her to the far end of the bar.

"Stay back here. I tried to get them to go someplace else but I couldn't stop them," Severus hissed under his breath.

"Tried to get who to go someplace else? Severus, what's going on?"

The answer to her question came in the form of a commotion coming through the door. A wizard stumbled in and loudly announced to the entire pub, "Never fear ladies, the Suave Slav returns!" Igor laughed loudly as did the first two wizards who entered the pub and the gaggle of cheap looking witches that were with them. Natalia gaped at the scene with a mixture of excitement and terror.

He wore some kind of old fashioned fedora hat pulled over one eyebrow and large blackout sunglasses although it was pitch dark out. His tuxedo jacket hung open and his shirt was unbuttoned down to his waist revealing his muscular chest with a smattering of hair trailing down to his groin. He wore two necklaces, one with a Durmstrang crest dangling from it and the other some kind of dark beads. His facial hair was

thick but trimmed closely and shaped sharply along his jawline.

Natalia couldn't help but watch him as he staggered over to the couch by the fire with a witch on either side. The two trashy looking tarts were fawning over him and he was relishing the attention, which broke her heart. He turned to the brunette and kissed her indulgently, roughly fondling her breast as he did. She could see their tongues licking each other's lips as the knot tightened in her chest. Then the blond on his other side began to feel left out. She ran her hand up his leg and began to grope his crotch. _What a slut._ He growled seductively and turned his attention in her direction, while the brunette began sucking on his neck, and sliding her hand under his shirt across his shoulder. In another moment they would be having it off right in the middle of the pub. Then a third woman walked up behind him, this one with auburn hair. She whispered something in his ear, and his eyes grew wide. He smiled turning towards her. He reached behind him and snaked an arm around her neck, then whispered something back to her, making her laugh. All the while, the other two continued to paw at him, taking turns stroking his crotch and kissing his neck and chest. He snickered, but his smile was forced and tense which was not lost on Natalia. No one else would have noticed that, but she knew him best. He had that same look prior to each task in the Tri-Wizard Tournament. He was in over his head.

She wanted to run but would be damned if she would let him see her defeated. A confrontation while he was dripping in an audience of sleazy women was surely to go in his favor, so she searched for something to busy herself. She ducked behind the bar and began to tidy up what was already immaculate.

"Evening, Nataila." Regulus greeted her formally.

"Oh, oh my heavens where are my manners?" She's forgotten that she never did greet her old friend properly. "It's lovely to see you again, Regulus. What can I get you?"

"Pumpkin juice for me. I've had enough. Get Severus a fire whiskey." Regulus nodded to Severus who was taking a barstool nearby. "He looks like he needs another round."

"Right." Natalia nodded nervously, served Severus his liquor and began to pour the pumpkin juice. However she was too busy watching the Igor show on the other side of the room and spilled the juice. "Oh shit!"

"Relax, Nat." Regulus vanished the mess for her and levitated the glasses to he and Severus.

She looked back at Igor just in time to see him extract himself from the skank fest, and begin to swagger towards the bar. There was nowhere to run so she turned her back to them and busied herself straightening the bottles behind the bar and wiping them down manually, though they were not remotely dusty.

"Regs!" She could hear him practically fall on the bar and felt the head radiate off his body, certain she was the only one who felt it. "Regs! I'm about to shag both these birds. I told them they were both lovely and couldn't choose. Guess what? They told me I didn't have to." He paused to giggle drunkenly. "Merlin knows I can handle it, but this third chick, she's a freak. She's scaring the shit out of me." His words were slurred. "You've got to take her off my hands, my friend."

"Not my type." Regulus cut him off.

"Not your type? Bugger your type! This girl is ready for action. She keeps talking about reverse cowgirl …I don't even know what that is but it sounds brilliant!" He dissolved into roars of laugher and she could hear his hand slap the bar. "But we have a very short window of opportunity. One more drink and they'll pass out. So will I for that matter."

Natalia winced thinking this couldn't possibly be any more excruciating.

"Pull yourself together, Karkaroff." Severus was completely disgusted by his friend's behavior as evident in his tone. "Regulus, help me get him out of here."

"Oh don't be such a drag, Snape." Igor turned on Severus who's gallantry was about to be mocked. "You know what's wrong with you? You need to get laid. Maybe you need that reverse cowgirl action. Yippe-ki-ya mother fuckerrrr!" Igor whooped and laughed while in the mirror she could see him swipe the drink sitting in front of Severus and down it in one shot. Severus merely glared at him in stony silence.

"Mmmm!" He paused to shake off the burn from the drink. "Now that I think about it, I don't think you could handle the Rhinestone Cowgirl over there, but we'll find you someone. Oh, see here." He pointed at Natalia's bum. "Look at the arse on this bartender."

Natalia felt her neck and cheeks grow hot under his disgusting observation.

"Shut up you idiot!" Severus hissed at him. It was an admirable yet entirely futile attempt to save her from the humiliation to come.

"Blood-dy hell! De-fucking-licious! I'd fancy getting balls deep in that myself." He slapped Severus on the chest with the back of his hand. "Don't tell me you don't want to take a bite out of that. Grrrr." Igor continued to laugh, finding himself most amusing. It didn't occur to him that he was the only one laughing, such a good time he was having.

"Knock it off, Karkaroff!" Regulus was also trying to help but to no avail.

"You shut it." Igor pointed his finger at Regulus, then he turned back to Snape. "Watch, and learn from the master." He would have been comical if her heart wasn't in shreds.

"Oi, sweetheart. What do you think of my comrade here?"

She tried to ignore him, but it was pretty obvious she wasn't going to be able to.

"Hey! You! Not very friendly are you?"

"Come on, Igor. Let's go check out the cowgirl." Regs tried to coax him away.

"Oh fuck that! What is this witch's problem? Is she deaf? Hey! You know snotty bartenders make terrible tips." He snarled, and turned to Severus. "And I don't care how bloody exquisite her ass is." Then he turned back on Natalia, "Why don't you turn around?" He attempted to whisper to Severus but was very loud. "She must be a butter face. You know what that is right? Nice body but her face…Oi!" He slapped the bar and roared with laughter yet again. He was the only one who found his jokes funny.

Finally she could take this humiliation no more. Knowing full well that this confrontation would be unavoidable, she whirled around on him. She clenched her jaw tightly to keep her lower lip from quivering. Under no circumstances would she allow him to see how he'd broken her heart again. Recognition was immediately obvious in his eyes, for they softened a bit, his shoulders dropped, and she swore she saw the beginning of a smile. It wasn't there for long, as he seemed to recollect even in his drunken stupor, why he loathed her. He stared at her, blinking several times before his eyes narrowed and he pursed his lips together. She knew that look well. He was planning his attack.

"Well, look at you." He hissed. "Bartending at The Three Broomsticks, thank _goodness_ you were able to…_work_ your way through school for this." He raised his eyebrows mockingly.

"For your information I own this establishment. I also own Honeydukes and the book store. You see I actually earn money rather than spending it on debauchery hand over fist."

"Oh yes." He smiled evilly, leaning over the bar. "I'm well aware of your penchant for _earning_ your own money. While I spend it on debauchery, it appears you earn it through debauchery." Damnit! She cursed herself for walking right in to that.

She narrowed her own eyes, mimicking his look and planning her own verbal assault. "I can't believe you joined them."

"Know what I can't believe?" His eyebrows shot up again, creasing his forehead. "That you took my father's money."

"Of course you can't. You've never been without money in your life. You don't know the desperation when you think you won't survive. You can't eat your principles you jackass! You've been coddled and indulged your whole life. And just look where it's gotten you."

"You are the one who compromised your integrity!" He accused her, slamming his fist on the bar.

"Says the Death Eater." She hissed right back at him. Two could play this game.

Regulus and Severus sat on either side of them looking at first one, then the other like they were muggles sitting center court at Wimbledon. "What did they do, lure you in with the promise of free snake tattoos and skeleton masks?" She was yelling at the top of her lungs now and heads all over the pub were turning in their direction.

Smirking at her joke, he retorted. "This is something I believe in, magical utopia."

"Magical utopia?" She laughed, mocking him. "Is that the same thing as reverse cowgirl?" She paused and then took a good look at his face. He looked different. His cheeks were hollow and his eyes bloodshot. He looked unhealthy with all the signs of a hard life. Then she noticed why his face looked so different and smirked. "Are you wearing eyeliner?" She paused to look more closely at his kohl rimmed eyes as her upper lip curled in disgust.

Igor, who previously thought he looked quite ravishing, now felt like a simple schoolboy who was trying too hard. His fury increased so rapidly that he was unable to articulate a scathing retort.

But Natalia was not at a loss. She had a head full of steam. "Go back to your bitches. I think they're in heat. Or perhaps you're just priming them to get passed around to your Death Eater friends like hot hors'devours."

"You shouldn't believe all the lies you hear about them." He sputtered.

"Why?" She was shouting loud making everyone uncomfortable. "You believe all the lies you hear about me."

"What lies? So you didn't have an abortion? You didn't carry Lucius Malfoy's child and lie to me about it? I think that's a big fucking secret to keep from your fiancé. How could I ever trust anything you say?"

He'd struck a nerve with that one and her tough exterior crumbled as she choked out her response. "It wasn't that simple."

"It was exactly that simple!" He bellowed, now attracting the attention of a majority of the patrons. "As if that wasn't bad enough you hid it from me. I had to endure the humiliating experience of having my father tell me."

"I was ashamed." She cried.

"As you should be." He boomed. "Not only were you irresponsible, you aborted a pureblood innocent."

"Listen to yourself! 'Pureblood innocent!' You sound like a fanatic. You don't know anything! Merlin! Will you never cease to talk out your arse prior to getting your facts straight?"

"He was too smart to let you trap him." Igor stooped over the bar, banged his elbow down on the table and pointed his finger at her like he often did when passionately arguing a point.

"I never wanted him." She screamed, tears beginning to burn their way through her tear ducts like acid.

"So he forced you?" He cocked his head to one side, raised his eyebrows questioningly and half-smiled as he waited for her to walk into his trap.

She didn't want to answer that. Considering their history, it wasn't simply a yes or no answer. While he forced her many times, there were just as many that he didn't. Furthermore, she was getting dangerously close to saying too much and breaking the unbreakable vow.

"Not so mouthy now are you, kitten?"

"Oh, Igor." How could he call her that now of all times?

"Oh Igor what?" He was still bellowing, out of his mind with fury. "Something you want to tell me? It's a simple question, either he did or he didn't. If he forced you, you should have turned him in to the authorities, so perhaps the truth is somewhere in the middle."

"Igor, you have to understand. I had no money. I was going to have to leave school. I would have been living on the street."

"He helped you? Paid you off you mean?"

She merely glared at him, tactically trapped and unable to respond. It was precisely what Lucius did, but when Igor said it, the story sounded a hundred times worse. She looked at the floor while desperately trying to steady her wobbling chin.

"Then you're nothing more than a common prostitute."

She jerked her eyes back up and stared at him dumbfounded, unable to speak. How could this man she loved, and still loved, say such a thing to her? How could someone she knew had such a kind and loving heart, cut her to the core like that? Why couldn't she make him understand that she didn't want to live that way? He stared at her unblinking for several seconds, now seeming sober as death. Then he gunned down his drink, slammed the glass down on the bar, and left. The thud of his hand hitting the door on the way out was so violent, everyone's head turned with a start in his direction.

Regulus was the first to speak. "Is that really what happened?"

"That's none of your business." Natalia quickly vanished Igor's glass, wanting to eliminate all evidence of him being there. She began wiping the counter with a vengeance.

"Lucius just married my cousin, it is my business."

"Narcissa knows what she's getting into." Severus gallantly answered for her, his deep voice bringing calm to the otherwise turbulent situation. "Telling her would only endanger Natalia. Then you would have me to contend with." Natalia never had a more true blue friend than Severus Snape, and that was the moment she realized it. Lily was surely an idiot not to see the potential in this man.

"Ever the defender of women." Regulus smirked and pushed his glass away. "I won't make trouble for you, Natalia. I'll talk to Igor for you too. He'll come around."

"Don't bother." As soon as she uttered the words she thought she sounded like a spiteful child and moved to retract them. Regulus meant no harm, quite the opposite. "I mean that's very kind of you, Regs, but if he can't listen to me, it will never work. I'm sorry you had to witness that. Please don't stop coming here because of this incident."

"All right then." He patted her hand before standing. "I'm going to get these girls out of here."

"Ahh, thank you Regulus." That was a welcome relief.

"How chivalrous." Severus heckled him.

"It's a dirty job, but someone has to do it. Why don't you help me?" He sounded so much like Sirius, when he proposed that it was uncanny. "It could have an interesting payoff."

Severus looked back at Natalia. Her head was down as she wiped up the bar for the tenth time, obviously not knowing exactly what to do with herself in that moment. A single tear escaped and spattered on the bar but she wiped it away almost immediately. "No. I'll stay here for a while."

Natalia sniffed hard. "You don't have to, Severus. Go have fun."

"I would rather stay here." He said softly. "You know that's not my nature."

Natalia smiled weakly. "Come on." She took his hand and led him over to the stairs. As she stepped on the second stair he stopped her.

Looking nervous, he gulped. "Where are we going?" He worried that she might have misinterpreted his kindness for something deeper. What would he do then? Further rejection would have a devastating effect on her.

She must have sensed his apprehension for she giggled. "Relax Severus. No reverse cowgirl for you tonight. I want you to meet my two best friends."

"Two best friends? I thought I was your best friend."

"Mmmmhmmm." She led him up to her room on the second floor. It was small, but neatly furnished. She walked over to a small refrigerator and pulled out two pints of ice cream. She tossed one to him and then pulled out two spoons from a nearby drawer. "Meet Ben and Jerry. We pass many lonely nights together and they always make me feel better."

Severus smiled and opened his pint. While Natalia dove right in and shoved a huge spoonful into her mouth, Severus was more tentative and scraped only a small taste onto his spoon. Tasting it, he winced a bit at the sweetness.

"Oh I forgot you don't care much for sweets. Would you prefer some crisps?" She opened a cabinet drawer and tossed a family size bag of crisps at him.

"No thank you." He watched her shove another enormous spoonful into her mouth and then shudder. Her shoulders drew up and she thumped at her forehead with her knuckle. "Are you all right?"

"Brain freeze." She gasped, while slumping down on the edge of her bed.

Severus chuckled. "You know what I like about you, Natalia?"

"Hot body?" She groaned, rocking back and forth and still thumping her head. "Great business head? Betty Davis eyes?"

"You always did use humor to cover pain."

"So what? You use sarcasm."

"Correct. What I like is that no matter what you've been through, you keep your innocence. You haven't become spiteful or dishonest. You're still the same."

"No, I'm not. I'm resentful and only share half the story. I am neither innocent nor the same. Not by a long shot, Severus. I don't trust anyone. Well except you, maybe Sasha. I'm lonely. I'm sad all the time. If I didn't have my work I don't think I could have enough strength to get out of bed in the morning. I dream of being in love and being loved in return but day after day goes by and I think it's an impossibility. "

"I wouldn't have guessed." He looked sadly at his friend.

"Depression is a very productive state for me. I can't bear to think of what was or what could have been, so I throw myself into work. It helps me forget."

"I can certainly relate to that." He took a seat beside her and dipped back into his ice cream.

"I know you can." She smiled. "That's why we're friends." She clinked her spoon against his.

Igor staggered drunkenly about the streets of Hogsmeade, feeling positively livid. He was furious all over again at Natalia for lying to him and humiliating him in front of his family. He was furious that she saw him behaving badly with those despicable whores. He was furious at himself for the ungentlemanly things he'd just said to her. But most of all he was furious that she was merely blocks away, yet he couldn't be with her. For despite all that happened since they parted ways, he'd never gotten over her. He'd thrown himself into other things, he'd tried hard, so hard to forget her, but the shock of seeing her again was too much. His heart physically hurt, a dull, longing ache, his breathing was irregular and his hands were shaking. How could she still have such an affect on him after all these years? That lying witch that broke his heart, he should hate her, but instead he was a slave to her.

Why must he still be so hung up on her? Why could he not move on? His fiery speeches made pureblood witches grow moist in his presence and he availed himself regularly of all the charms they had to offer. The pleasures were decadent, but much like rich food, they failed to nourish him, and he felt vacant inside afterwards. He'd stopped counting his conquests long ago, what did it matter? There was only one witch that mattered.

He staggered back to The Three Broomsticks but was too ashamed of himself to go inside. What could he possibly say to undo what had already been done? In his drunken stupor he could think of nothing to do short of falling at her feet, weeping and begging for her forgiveness. Certainly she would throw him out on his ear if he dared set foot inside again. He stood at the door trying to work up his nerve but could not, so he stumbled across the street and sat down on the curb, watching the building for any signs of her. The downstairs was dark, but there was a light on upstairs. Perhaps that was her room. He could see her shadow. She paced back and forth in the room. Was she upset about their argument? He hoped she was, for if it didn't upset her, if she was thinking about anything else at the moment, he would be crushed.

Her shadow sat down and her hands went to her face. Was she crying? Maybe she just had a headache. No, her shoulders were shaking and he could hear the faint sounds of her sobs through the window. Oh, how could he have done this to her again? A painful vibration shook his chest. Then another form appeared, and embraced her. He was still quite drunk and the sight of another man's hands on his Natalia made him physically ill. How dare they? It was his place and his place only to comfort her, to dry her tears, to embrace her and make everything better. But she was lost to him, and it was his own doing.

The realization made him feel physically ill. His stomach tensed and he began to taste the bile rising in his throat. With a shudder, he fell to his side and wretched loudly in the otherwise silent street. His body shook violently as everything he'd consumed in the last twenty-four hours was expelled from his body. Finally he was down to painful dry heaves that nearly paralyzed him with pain, and then slowly, they subsided. Breathing heavily, he used the sleeve of his dress robes to wipe the vomit off his chin.

When he looked back up at her window, the male form was looking out at him. He couldn't make out who it was, but the form quickly moved away from the window, presumably to come outside and confront him. Igor was in no condition for a fight but not in great condition to escape. He was too drunk to apparate away, surely he would splinch himself if he tried. Having no other option, he attempted to run, but could only stagger down the street.

He hadn't gotten far when Severus Snape burst out of The Three Broomsticks after him. "Karkaroff. Get back here."

Igor whirled around on him a little too fast, staggered, reeled, and nearly fell backwards. "Fuck you, Snape!" He slurred. "What the hell are you doing out here? Looked like you were getting ready to shag my witch? Oi! Not man enough to seal the deal, eh?"

"Your witch? If that isn't a laugh." Severus drawled calmly as he stalked down the street.

"Yes, MY witch." Igor sputtered, beating his chest, so furious and trashed, he couldn't articulate his thoughts. He wanted to hurt someone and Snape was the closest potential victim. He reached for his wand but wasn't quick enough.

"Expelliarmus!" Severus had him easily disarmed.

"What the? You mother fucker."

"Muffilato!" He was easily silenced. Severus picked up his wand, grabbed Igor by the collar and apparated them back to Spinners End.

"Where are we?" Igor mumbled as Snape was shoving him through the front door.

"My house."

"I'm going home." Igor started to leave but Severus pushed him down on the sofa.

"You're not going anywhere but the couch. Shut it and go to sleep." Severus walked to the hall closet to remove a pillow and blanket.

"What's going on with you and Natalia?"

"Nothing. I don't ball every woman that looks twice at me." Severus threw the blanket at Karkaroff and it smacked him in the face.

Igor snarled at him. "How long has she owned the pub?"

"Since a month after you broke your engagement. She's worked very hard you know. She had to. The business was failing when she took it over and now it's not only thriving, but she's acquired two more and looking at a third. She's quite successful." Severus went over to a wall cabinet and began examining small vials, looking for something

"I always knew she would be." A sense of melancholy fell upon Igor as he remembered the hard working little girl from the pub, and the pitch, and the potions lab. He remembered how hard she tried to learn his native language because she wanted to please his family and blend in to his life. "She is intelligent and hardworking. Success would of course follow her."

"I'm sure that's what you meant to say rather than calling her a…what was it…oh yes, a prostitute." Severus handed him one of the vials. "Take this. It will sober you up so you won't feel like rubbish in the morning."

Igor examined the draught, not sure he trusted Snape. Then decided he didn't care what the potion did to him and downed the whole thing. It was extremely bitter and he made a terrible face as he handed the vial back to Snape. "Is she seeing anyone?"

"No. She works constantly. Says she has no time for fun though she's asked out quite a bit. And don't you go getting any ideas either."

"What's that supposed to mean?"

"It means stay away from her."

"Oh so you have designs on her, eh?"

"No, but you need to understand your position. Let me enlighten you. You're married to the movement now. Any woman you bring into your life becomes endangered. Narcissa, look at her. She's married to Lucius but if the Dark Lord takes a fancy to her, that's over. Anyone you get close to has a target on their back. Am I getting through to you?"

Igor felt a chill run down his spine. Severus was one hundred percent correct. No matter how he felt about Natalia, they could never be together now. Not that she would want him after his performance tonight. He nodded.

"Good. Getting dumped by you was the luckiest thing to ever happen to her. You know it took her a long time to get over you. I'm not sure she ever did."

He winced and the pain in his chest intensified. "Don't tell me these things."

"I will. Why should you be the only one without a broken heart?"

_AN: Thanks so much to all who are following the story. Not sure if I will get another update in before Christmas so this one was a long one. Hope you all enjoy your holidays! We are heading to Harry Potter World in Orlando and so I am busy picking out my outfit for the Yule Ball-haha! If you leave me a review I'll make sure one of the Durmstrang hotties asks you to come too:)_


	52. Chapter 52

CHAPTER FIFTY TWO

Time out of mind

Severus scowled down at Karkaroff snoring loudly as he sprawled his long limbs across the sitting room couch. His hair was a tangled mess of dark waves and his rumbled dress robes reeked of expensive scotch and the cheap perfume of the sleazy company he kept. His mouth was hanging open with a bit of drool about to drip off his lip and his color was bad after a night of carousing.

"Get up," Severus snarled, becoming even more incensed when his order produced no reaction and Karkaroff snored even louder. "I said get UP!" This time he punctuated his demand with a firm kick to the shin.

"Ouch! What the fuck?" Igor growled leaning up abruptly and grabbing his shin. "What's wrong with you? Who wakes up a house guest like that?"

"Oh for Merlin's sake, you're a drunk on my couch, not a guest at the Savoy," Severus hissed in the snotty tone that was becoming more and more his trademark these days. "You look like rubbish. How's your head?" Severus stood over Igor and glared disapprovingly at him.

Igor winced and rubbed his temples. "Hurts," he grunted for he was still quite foggy.

Severus tossed another vial at him. "Drink this. It will take the edge off and then the fog should lift in about an hour. I have to go," Severus paused briefly. "Don't be here when I return."

"Govnjuk!" Igor grumbled childishly while hoping Severus didn't know that was the Russian word for bastard. He obediently finished the draught and growled at Severus while flopping back down on the couch. He would do as he damned well pleased and this bat would not stop him. However at the moment he felt too shitty to argue. Severus turned on his heel and left with a flourish of black robes swirling behind him.

Igor groaned loudly and then rolled over and tried to sleep but he could not, for a feeling that something bad had happened was gnawing at him. Slowly, little details of the previous evening began coming back to him. The Malfoy wedding he remembered, the dinner afterward as well, however the reception was foggy and he had no idea how they ended up at the The Three Broomsticks. He remembered the randy girls he had met and his cock came to life. Three girls at once was his lurid plan for the evening, but they were nowhere to be seen this morning and he felt insanely backed up so obviously that plan did not come to fruition. He'd never had a problem closing the deal before and searched his sketchy memory for the reason. Then all at once the hideous memory hit him like a crushing jinx, Natalia.

"Oh no," he groaned as he now understood the feeling of dread he awoke with. Natalia, he'd seen her. Ah, she looked lovely; that he remembered. They'd had words, very ugly words. What had he said? He couldn't remember but he knew from the knots in his stomach it wasn't good. They'd argued bitterly. She'd laughed at his eyeliner; that humiliation he was unfortunate enough to recall. He rubbed under his eyes knowing he looked like a raccoon at the moment. What else? He'd gotten angry and called her, oh no, a prostitute.

All these years he'd been so angry, so hurt, and so terribly bitter. He'd tried so desperately to escape the pain she left him with through drink, drugs, women, politics and dark magic, but although they were momentary distractions the memories always returned and he was forced further down the rabbit hole of vice and destruction. Ah, but to see that lovely witch last night turned his world upside down. Despite the pain and humiliation she left him with, he still ached for her. "Damn," he muttered to no one and got up to take a shower. Perhaps that would clear his head and he could go back to his life that was devoid of all things Natalia. He wanted to get out of this rat trap and back to his own bed in the penthouse suite he was now using in the swankiest section of magical London.

Natalia knocked on the door of her friend's house in the run down area called Spinners End. It had been years since she'd visited him here for he didn't like people coming to his home, but she had to see him. The prior evenings encounter with Igor was unsettling and he was the only one she could talk to. He knew everything, even the things she was sworn not to tell another living soul.

There was no answer and she decided he must be sleeping in a bit. It was a late night for all of them. She remembered the wards he used as a teenager and took a guess. "Half Blood Prince," she muttered and the front door popped open an inch. That was a little too easy and she made a mental note to mention it to him. She pushed her way inside and heard water running in the small bathroom just off the living room. It was a little late for him to be just now getting up but it was a lazy Sunday so she thought nothing of it. She wandered into the study to wait for him and noticed a pile of dress robes and a blanket on the floor. That was unusual for him not to sleep upstairs not to mention leaving a mess. Normally he didn't have house guests but then his life as a Death Eater was quite different these days. She heard the bathroom door open behind her at the exact moment she noticed the Durmstrang cuff link still attached to the cuff of the shirt. She froze, terrified to turn around.

Igor fresh from the shower was in nothing but a towel around his waist and another around his neck that he was using to dry his hair. He took only two steps into the room before he too froze. She turned slowly to face him and when their eyes met he felt his insides melt. Then a pained expression shadowed her face and she ran past him out of the room nearly knocking his towel off. He had to scramble to keep it on and go after her at the same time. She opened the door an inch but he was immediately behind her slamming it shut and pinning her between it and his wet bare chest.

"Let me go," she whimpered shakily.

"Not yet." No way in hell was he letting her go without a fight.

She began to struggle to open the door and attempting push him off but he was far too powerful to be moved unless he wanted to be.

"Stop. Don't run from me." He pressed himself back against her and lowered his voice, breathing purposefully on her neck when he spoke again. "No matter what's happened between us, you know I would never physically hurt you." She stopped struggling and he smiled blissfully knowing that while their connection was damaged, it was not broken. They were both breathing heavily and mercilessly he did not release her, not yet. "I'm sorry for my behavior last night."

"As you should be." She hissed, struggling to speak under his weight and her mad desire for him despite their circumstance.

"Yes, as I should." He ran his hand gently down her arm but did not release her. He couldn't let her go, still haunted by unanswered questions. "I just don't understand why…"

"I am not having this conversation again." Her body tensed again. "It's too late for this discussion and besides, we've both moved on."

He sighed heavily, his head still pounding despite Snape's draught which barely affected a hangover of Karkaroff proportions. "I suppose." But he did not release her, for he may have moved around, but certainly not moved on. He could never forget the greatest love of his life. He wasn't going to let her go so quickly. "At least stay for coffee. I want to hear all about your life." He felt tension ease out of her body once again and knew she would stay with him, at least for a little while.

"I'll make it. You get dressed." She tried to move but he remained pressed against her.

"Promise you won't leave if I let you go?"

"I promise," she replied, and he believed her.

He released her but reluctantly as he was enjoying the feel of her bum against his hips. She had filled out a little more since he'd last seen her. Releasing her was for the best though, as he was seconds from a hard on and felt quite confident that she would reward that with a slap in the face or a swift kick in the balls. Neither option was appealing to him.

While he was in the other room putting on his trousers and the shirt to his dress robes, he heard her clanging around in the kitchen and sighed yet again at the domestic rhythms that he could have enjoyed with her all these years. Why did she have to lie to him? It made his heart hurt all over again just thinking of how they'd parted so quickly and so horribly.

He busied himself tidying up the room which in addition to his robes being strewn across the place, also looked like there might have been a mild scuffle with Snape the prior evening. He remembered a terse conversation and some kind of warning, but the details were fuzzy. She entered carrying a large tray with a coffee pot, two mismatched mugs and some toast. He smiled at her attempt to pull together a small bit of hospitality in such an inhospitable abode. It was a mark of the humble sweetness that he'd always found so charming in this girl and his deep regret vibrated in his heart.

"Thought you looked like you might need a little something on your tummy. You're looking a little worse for wear this morning." She set the tray on the table and handed him a steaming cup of black coffee.

It had been so long since someone tended to him out of genuine concern. The women who drifted in and out of his life these days were all after something; power, money, a sexual adventure but they only did things for him in an effort to get something back. Knowing what he knew now about Natalia and Lucius, and the pay-off from both fathers, she was more than likely after something now. But what could it be? His head pounded and he reached out to take the steaming mug she was handing him. As he did, his unbuttoned shirt sleeve lifted revealing purple bruises and dark tracks along his thin but muscular forearm. He took a grateful sip of coffee and raised his eyes to find her staring at his forearm and the telltale track marks left by his addiction to Black Dragon.

"How long has that been going on?" She nodded to his arm. He was found out. Really his ongoing chase of the Dragon, as he called it was an open secret, not advertised but not aggressively concealed, for those in his circle cared not. It was only now, under her sweetly pained face that he felt ashamed, and this annoyed him. This is why he didn't need a woman in his life. She had always kept him away from excessive partying and made him to the right thing. At one time in his life he liked who he was when he was with her, but now under the twisted grip of the Dragon, he rationalized that he was better off without her. He was better off being alone and free of such constraints that a woman like Natalia would put upon him.

"What's it to you?" He snapped with a conceited cock of his head, for he was not in the mood for a sermon much less from a liar.

She seemed to consider her response carefully which irritated him further. He could almost see the wheels turning into her head as she concocted a way to manipulate him while taking another sip of her coffee. He noticed her cup it had cream in it as she always liked and even that served to annoy him, watering down a perfectly good brew to a tepid mess, which was exactly what she would try to do to him if he wasn't careful.

"That rubbish will kill you if you aren't careful," she finally said softly.

"Hasn't killed me yet." He gave a flat smile that did not reach his eyes and shrugged in an attempt to make her believe that this abuse of mind altering potions banned by the Ministry were was merely recreational, but that was a lie he was telling himself.

"Yet," Natalia sipped her coffee and raised a disbelieving eyebrow.

Igor began to feel jumpy at the mention of his favorite escape. The tar like concoction was a mere three feet away in his coat draped over a nearby chair; at least he hoped it was still there. His foot began to tap restlessly and his pulse quickened. He couldn't go more than a few hours without needing a fix these days but still didn't seem to think he had a problem. So many in the Dark Lord's circle used and it became commonplace. He became so focused on his craving that he didn't notice the widening gap of silence between the two of them. He took another sip of coffee and began to wish she would leave so he could have his fix.

"Eat your toast. It will calm your nerves," Natalia spoke softly to him.

Once again she was bossing him around but oh, how he missed the comforting sound of her voice. He looked at her again and thought how lovely her face was and what treachery it concealed. Still, what he wouldn't give for a hit of Black Dragon and violent shag. Yes a truly violent shag to put this conniving witch in her place and have her once again desiring him, the very thought was delicious. Would she resist him? Yes. Most likely she would resist and in his needy state she would win. He needed a hit so badly his legs were beginning to spasm. He tried to control them but she noticed and called him out.

"Don't let me stop you," she remarked haughtily. "If you need a hit take a hit. I was just leaving." She rose to leave, unable to watch him dissolve into a panic over his unquenched thirst for rubbish.

"No. Don't go." He grabbed her hand. "Stay. I...I...just need a little..."he became nauseous at the sound of his pathetic pleas that he hadn't intended to say out loud.

"Igor," she whispered softly, taking his hand. "You don't need any of that."

The thought of not having another hit was horrifying and rage rose up to defend the addiction like the worst kind of dark curse. He jerked his hand out of hers, stood up and backed away from her. "You have no idea what I need."

She sighed heavily, giving up quicker than he'd thought or hoped she would. "Perhaps not, but I did once...but you were a better man then."

And with that she left him, his heart wounded as well as his pride. She was right. But he couldn't think about that now. All he could think about was the warm wave of bliss he would feel in a few moments. So rather than go after her as a man deserving of such a witch would, he ran straight for the container of thick paste in his coat pocket. His hands shook as he struggled to open it and dip the tip of his wand in it. As soon as he touched the darkness to his arm he felt right again and slumped back in his chair as the familiar numbness overtook him.


	53. Chapter 53 Dr Feelgood

CHAPTER 53

Dr. Feelgood

Natalia spent Christmas Day with the children, which was perfect for they gave her much joy even though they were exhausting at times. Each child received a special present from her that she had personally chosen for them. She made a large Christmas breakfast while they sat in their little high chairs and watched with wide eyes. When their tummies were full, she changed all their nappies and tucked them in for a midday nap.

It was to be a day of rest but with the regular nanny off, she was already exhausted so she made herself a cup of tea and went into her room. She opened the curtains and forlornly watched the snow fall quietly along the deserted streets of Hogsmeade as she remembered previous walks in the snow with Igor so many years ago. The arms that had once so tenderly shielded her from the cruel world were now disturbingly disfigured by drugs and dark marks. The very thought made her shudder and she swallowed a large lump of worry in her throat.

She simply could not get herself into the Christmas spirit after her two disastrous run-ins with Igor. She was angry and disappointed in him but more than anything, she was terrified for his safety. The story in The Daily Prophet about his deplorable partying had been true, but far more disturbing was the revelation of his drug use. As if joining Voldemort wasn't bad enough, he was now dependent on Black Dragon and could be easily manipulated by that without magic. His judgment was already impaired if his erratic behavior was any indication.

To make matters worse, things were getting stranger in general. There were unexplained disappearances of prominent people and others known to openly oppose Lord Voldemort's racist notions. Natalia, though like-minded with those people, was savvy enough to keep a low profile and distance herself from them. She had four orphans under her care now and had to think of them first before grandstanding radically and drawing attention to herself as Sirius and his friends did. So when Sirius hopefully asked her to be his guest at Lily and James on Christmas day, she politely declined. As cocky as he was, she shouldn't have been surprised when he vowed to wear her down. But there would be no wearing her down. She had enough issues between worrying herself sick over Igor and dreading the inevitable moment when Lucius would proposition her again. Men were nothing but trouble and she already had plenty.

Igor awoke alone and I'll from too much drinking the night before. He rolled over to gaze out the window of his penthouse apartment in O'Kent Square to see near white out conditions. It was a white Christmas that reminded him of his youth in Russia, and the memories made him dreadfully melancholy. He missed his siblings and his parents on special holidays, but his stubborn streak prevented him from visiting them. Still he yearned for the traditional foods his mother would serve and the warmth of family life. He contemplated ordering his newly acquired house elf Sandy to cook the traditional holy supper for him but that was surely a recipe for disaster.

She'd come to him through a winning hand of poker against Dulohov and he had been ecstatic with his prize for it represented status to own a servant. He was surprised when Dulohov merely shrugged at the loss, but he soon realized why his opponent was glad to be rid of her. Sandy had come from some island in the West Indies and while her accent was charming, she was terribly bossy, flippant to her master and quite vocal about her disapproval of his lifestyle. 

"Who dat girl I saw sneakin' out of da room dis mornin'? Get yourself up now so I can wash dem sheets," she would chastise. "No tellin' where baggage like dat been dees days."

Igor snickered to himself for Sandy was dead right but he would outwardly scold her for her cheek.

"Eh," she coughed one morning after a party he'd hosted for the Lestranges. "De may come from a fine family but de got de manners of trolls. Knocking over my master's water pipes and cleaning out his liquor cabinet. Dat Misuz always cackling loud enough to wake de dead and checking out all de mens in front of er' 'usband."

"Enough!" Igor would groan even though he agreed with her. But his good humor ended when she discussed his illicit potions.

"You rot de brain wit dis garbage. No nice witch gonna talk to you wit dos marks on ya arm."

Igor's response was low and uncharacteristically menacing. "That topic is off limits unless you want me to sell you to the Lestranges. They won't put up with your mouth."

She was quiet on that subject after that, but Igor found that his stash frequently came up short or altogether missing if he didn't keep close tabs on it. Though he couldn't prove that he hadn't gotten so wasted he misplaced it, or did more than the thought, he was pretty sure she was hiding it from him. Sadly, his devoted servant was the closest thing to family he had today.

So when he bumbled into the kitchen in his pajama bottoms with massive bed head on Christmas morning, he greeted her with a hearty "Happy Christmas, Sandy."

"Appy Christmas to you too, Master Igor. Will dere be a lady joining you for breakfast dis fine morning?"

She knew him embarrassingly well. "No Sandy, not today," he sighed and poured himself a cup of strong black coffee from the pot she had sitting on the stove. "It's just you and me today." For this he was actually glad, for the morning after with these various witches he bedded was always awkward. "I'll see you again soon," he always lied and hoped they knew better than to believe him. Surely they didn't.

"You need to find yourself a nice witch and settle down, clean up your act," she muttered while clanging dishes around in the sink. "Den you won't be stuck with your house elf on Christmas."

Igor sipped his steaming cup of coffee, preferring to get some caffeine in his system before he dealt with little miss know it all. He was still too groggy for an argument so he chose to kill her with kindness as the saying went. "Sandra, you are by far the most charming woman I know, and a holiday with you is a blessing." He was laying it on thick but only half kidding for he had no better prospects. He raised his coffee mug to her. The little elf smiled and then directed him to the table. "Go eat your breakfast."

"Only if you join me." He swept his arm towards the table and bowed slightly. His particular brand of charm that worked on witches and muggle women of all ages and inclinations would certainly work on female house elves.

Sandy looked suspicious but shuffled dutifully to the table and hopped up on the chair, her large eyes barely seeing over the table.

Igor gazed across the table laden with sausages, quiche, sweet breads and fruit. His mother would have been pleased with the little elf's efforts and that was a statement for she was perpetually dissatisfied. He began to feel guilty for considering the little waif an annoyance at times and attempted to engage in cordial conversation.

"So Sandy, did you have any family Christmas traditions?"

"Why you wanna ask your house elf des questions?" She was unaccustomed to the level of familiarity Igor projected towards everyone even servants, for her last master was cold and dismissive.

Igor shrugged as he chomped on a large piece of sausage, his table manners still atrocious well into adulthood with no one to point out this shortcoming so that it might be corrected. "We might as well make conversation," he mumbled with a mouthful of food.

Sandy's lip curled in disgust though she tried not to be obvious. "I don' like talkin' 'bout my family."

Igor persisted, never being one who was respectful of personal boundaries and oblivious that others would be put off by such prying. "I'll make you a deal. If you tell me something about yourself, I will tell you something about myself."

Sandy looked down at her sausage and began to cut it up into bites. "I already know too much," she said gravely.

"Oh I doubt that," Igor quipped. "You strike me a right nosey little imp."

She scowled at him for a moment before starting the game. "When I was little, my mother and I served a family who lived by the sea. She would make me little presents and hide them in seashells."

"Hmmmm," he hummed thoughtfully while envisioning her as a tiny little elf opening seashells with eager anticipation.

"My turn." She quickly took her opportunity to ask something that she'd been wondering about. "I heard date you were once engaged to a lovely young lady dat adored you, but datt you abandoned her."

Igor dropped his fork which clanked loudly against his plate and made his surprise glaringly obvious. "Abandoned her?" He gaped at her for he'd never considered how his actions would have appeared to people who didn't know the sorted details. "No," he responded sadly. "It wasn't like that."

"Den why did you split up?" Sandy pressed him quickly, not wanting to lose momentum for she was dying to know the truth.

He leaned back in his chair and smirked at her in amusement, finally composing himself. "You know so much, you tell me."

Sandy was bold as always. "It was because she was poor. You wanted a rich wife and so when you got tired of her, you cast her off."

"Hmmm, so that's the story circulating through the kitchens and servants quarters these days."

"Is dere a better one?"

"For your information it had nothing to do with finances. She lied to me about something, something big. When I discerned the true nature of her character, I naturally could no longer associate with her." His stomach turned at his own words which sounded so clinical and cold while the mere mention of her name made his heart burn for her all over again. Duplicity was bad for his soul.

"And are dese witches you associate yourself wit now of upstanding character?" The way Sandy put the emphasis on "up" made it sound like she was stifling a belch and was quite apropos when considering the witches he'd been balling of late.

"It's not their character I'm interested in." He raised his eyebrows naughtily and shrugged an outward appearance of nonchalance. "It makes no difference really. "

"It does if you want to spend Christmas with someone other dan your servants."

Sandy remained silent for Igor was slow to anger and she knew she had overstepped her bounds. They ate in silence for several minutes before she spoke again, this time softly. "You learn a lot about the people you serve. I know you to be a kind hearted man despite the company you keep. I just hope you find a nice witch one day. Den you be happy."

"I'm happy now," he said coolly.

"Den why you need dat Black Dragon?"

Igor glared over the table at her his rage bubbling to the surface in the face of this impudent little elf. "Why you insolent little twerp! Who are you to judge me?" He whipped the napkin out of his lap and threw it down on his plate before rising to leave the table. "Clean this rubbish up. I'm going back to bed. Anything is better than listening to you flap your trap all day. " He'd had enough. It was almost noon and he had yet to have a fix of Black Dragon, so this conversation needed to end quickly. Igor stalked away from the table and into the seclusion of his locked bedroom. There he rifled through his coat pocket and sighed with relief when he found the pot of the dragon. His hands shook as he opened the pot and even his wand clanked against the sides of it as he dipped it in, but the moment he touched the substance to his arm the warm, heavy blanket of relief engulfed him and he flopped back down on the bed.

He lay there for an hour or so, watching the snow fall and stewing about his conversation with Sandy. It irritated him that a few barbs from a mere servant could get to him so. But what bothered him even more was that he'd been thinking about Natalia constantly since he last saw her. She'd called him out on his addiction as well and for the first time he was beginning to feel shame for the hold it had over him. He longed to see her, to apologize yet again and to experience the joy she'd once brought him. So since it was Christmas and also since he was high as a hippogriff, he made the decision to pay her a visit.

Igor apparated to the snowy streets of Hogsmeade just before dusk, and gazed along the empty streets, soaking in the eerie silence that always seemed to accompany a blanket of snow. He admired the improved frontage of The Three Broomsticks. When last he was here it had been pitch black and he was inebriated, so this pleasant scene had gone unnoticed. She had obviously worked hard in these years without him. She had accomplished something. If asked he would tout his own accomplishments to her, but inside he felt like he was floundering. The Dark Lord used him only at public events saving more important missions for others. He felt like a show pony rather than a work horse and the idleness was bothersome. It did not occur to him that he was quite useless and unreliable in the grips of his addiction that he would not call an addiction.

The melodious sound of children's laughter wafted from the back of the building and he immediately recognized the next voice as Natalia's. "Then we will give him a big orange carrot for a nose. Then Donald, you and Curt put the coal on the front for the buttons. Oh Katherine, that's a lovely snow angel, but jump up now before you get snow in your boots."

Igor's heart warmed immediately and he crept down the alley next to the pub as quietly as he could so he would be unseen and also still be able to eavesdrop. He peeped through a knothole in the fence to see Natalia looking lovely as ever in her old Slytherin stocking cap with her shoulder length dark hair peeking out below. He cheeks were pink from the chill in the air as she tossed tiny snowballs lightly at the children in the yard. There were four little ones; two little boys and two girls, none of which could have been older than two. He was baffled. Who could all these children belong to? Surely they were not hers. He would have heard for gossip such as that was too hot not to spread amongst his cronies and they would have been more than happy to unload that terrible tidbit on him. She looked as joyful as he remembered her when they were in school, and he couldn't help watching her in secret until she began to collect the children to go inside.

"All right then, can't have you all get chilled to the bone. Let's go inside and have some hot chocolate before dinner. Come now, spit spot! Don't forget to wipe your feet."

He chuckled softly at her motherly inclinations that were utterly her. She heard the soft male laughter and cocked her head in the direction of the knot hole. He was caught. She shooed the children quickly inside while drawing her wand in his direction and never taking her eye off the knot hole.

"Who's there?" She asked sternly when the children were inside. Igor did not respond but tried to remain motionless as she drew nearer. His heart nearly stopped as he continued to peer through the hole. Closer and closer she came now meeting his gaze directly as she zeroed in on the eye staring back at her. She was mere inches away from him and despite the barrier between them he could feel the electricity flowing between them. She stopped and for a moment their eyes remained locked. He moved his face even closer to the knot hole, his eye right upon the opening. His eyes were wide and vulnerable when her finger suddenly poked through the hole, nearly blinding him and sending him reeling backwards holding his wounded eye and grunting in pain.

"Ouch! What are you trying to do, poke my eye out?"

Natalia waved her wand, vanishing the wooden fence between them. "It would serve you right, spying on people. What are you doing here anyway?"

Igor shook his head violently and rubbed his eye, then blinked in an exaggerated manner trying to right his eye in the socket. He groaned again and looked upward, moving his eyes around to test them. Finally he looked down at her with his one bloodshot eye and answered, "I came to wish you a Merry Christmas."

Natalia paused and looked up to study him. "Merry Christmas." She replied flatly before she turned to go back inside.

"Wait. Don't go yet."

"What is it, Igor? I can't leave the children by themselves."

"May I come in with you? I could help you. Looks like you have your hands full." He cringed at the desperation in his own voice, how undignified.

"I don't want them around junkies," she spat.

"Junkie?" His spine stiffened at the insult for he did not use that word to define himself and even Sandy would tread lightly around such a slur.

She turned to go again. But he grabbed her arm.

"Take your hands off me!" She stuck her wand in his ribs.

"Oh, so high and mighty now aren't you, kitten?"

They glared at each other until she tried to, pull away again.

"Not so fast. Whose children are those?"

"That doesn't concern you."

"Well it's Christmas and they are with you and not their parents so my guess is they are orphans. You know the dark lord has heard of this. He's been making inquiries. It could get dangerous if he decides he doesn't like this."

"I know that. I don't need you sticking your nose into things."

Igor narrowed his eyes trying to figure out how she could know of something he thought Voldemort only shared with his inner circle. "You presume to know what the Dark Lord, thinks?"

Natalia tried to pull away but he held her arm tightly, so she spat the words that she knew would repel him, "Lucius told me."

He was predictably horrified, releasing her like she had a disease, and stepping away. So they were still in contact. Lucius was not long married and this information about the Dark Lord was new so they were surely in contact recently. He felt his lip curl up in disgust as the pit of his belly knotted and he began to crave the dragon once again to dull his pain. "Hmpf," he grunted. "I should have known; all these years and you are still crawling to that rat."

"I crawl to no one. We are friends and no more."

"Ah yes, what's that phrase? Friends with benefits?" He wanted to kick himself the second he said it. Why couldn't he get control of his mouth? This lack of self-discipline would not serve his needs.

"I won't grace that barb with an answer for it doesn't deserve one." Her tone was condescending as if she were speaking to one of the children while she busied herself picking up a discarded mitten and a wayward used tissue that one of the children had dropped. "Lucius Malfoy is a married man and I…" her voice caught in her through and when she looked up at him, he could feel their connection like the first time he kissed her. "Well I…" she inhaled sharply and exhaled the rest of her sentence, "I have a very full life as you can see."

"Are you seeing anyone?" It was a heavy handed inquiry but he had to know. Did he have any competition? Was his way clear?

"What business of that is yours?"

He was unprepared for her curt response and stumbled a bit. Perhaps he was mistaken about her feelings. "I…I certainly wish you no ill will."

"Ha!" Natalia rolled her eyes and put her hands on her hips. Igor knew he was in for it. "You wish me no will ill." She began to walk closer to him, wand down but gripped tightly. "Really? Really? That's the best you've got; 'no ill will'. After you cast me out without a prayer, humiliated me in front of your parents, never contacted me again until you waltz into MY pub and call ME a prostitute in front of everyone in the place. Me? A prostitute after I have to open the bloody Daily Prophet every day and hear about your latest STD ridden conquest? Well, that's just bloody brilliant, that is?" Her eyes blazed and he felt the heat in his cock. His mouth began to water.

"Natalia, please, just let me apologize." Dear Merlin, he wanted this witch in his bed tonight. He would do anything.

"I don't want your apologies."

"Then what do you want? Please tell me." He put his hand lovingly on her hip. Oh he was so close to kissing her. Another moment and she would be his again and this sad tale would end. "I'll give you anything," he breathed, mere inches from her face. "I want to make things right."

"Anything?"

Her tone was soft but he didn't like the way she said 'anything' like there would be some business condition some cause or caveat he was about to find extremely distasteful. Shamefully, he prepared to be asked for money, for that was still how he viewed her, but her request was to be far more terrifying."

She put her hands on his and gazed up into his eyes. "Get yourself clean."

He stood staring at her for a moment, knowing his response but ashamed to give it life.

She squeezed his hand and inched closer. "For me. Please."

He pulled back and squared his shoulders. "Always think you know what's best, don't you?"

"Not always, but in this case, yes. You wouldn't be acting so erratically if you weren't under the influence."

He sighed heavily and looked at the purple sky, darkening under the setting sun. He needed to change the subject. Perhaps if he could just get inside with her, if he could have her attentions with no one else, they could work through this. He knew he had enough Dragon in his pocket to get through the night and if he was careful he could hide the actual use of it. "May I at least come in?"

"No." She shook her head slowly; the joy from moments ago now completely vanished. From inside the kitchen a loud clatter of pots and pans startled them both, followed by laughter from the children who were setting about demolishing the kitchen. "I have to go." She went in before he could utter another word.

His shoulders slumped and he jammed his hands in his pockets while wondering how he'd let his life become such a mess. As the snow began to fall again he walked down the gloomy alleyway awash in painful nostalgia and deep regret for not telling her how beautiful she looked today.


	54. Chapter 54 Time Out Of Mind

CH 54

Time Out Of Mind

It was a warm and tender Christmas evening at the Levin household as Fiona and Leopold Levin played on the living room floor with their two little boys aged three and one. They had married right after leaving school and were the glowing example of wholesome, happy family life.

"Levin!" Both parents jumped at the obnoxious drunken voice coming from the fire. "Leviiiiiin, where the hell are you?" They both looked into the fireplace to see Igor's face in the coals.

"Idiot!" Fiona huffed as she gathered up her littlest and took her oldest by the hand to lead them out of the room away from such an unsavory character.

Igor watched her go with the Levin children then turned to his friend who had pulled a chair closer to the fire. "She never liked me," he grumbled.

"Not true," Levin said lightly. "Not true at all. She used to like you very much. I'm not sure I like you that much myself these days."

"Mmmmm, so you're deserting me too eh?" His boyhood friend's tone saddened Igor for Levin was the last vestige of his youth that was not tarnished.

"You deserted me years ago," Levin said bitterly. "You deserted everyone for that lot of troublemakers, and for what?"

Igor growled, "I don't want to discuss politics."

"We'll you obviously want something. I haven't heard from you in years and now here you are sticking your pissed face in my fire on Christmas. What's on your mind? You sound sort of..."

"I saw Natalia," Igor confessed quickly for he could not wait any longer to talk to someone about this and Levin was the only one who would understand.

Levin chuckled. "Oh, really? And how did it go? No wait, let me guess, not well."

"She looked stunning," he mused, recalling the lovely curve of her face and the pinkish hue of her cheeks in the cold weather. "By the wrath of Rasputin her body was...ahh...what I wouldn't give to shag her again."

"Charming. I hope you had the good sense to keep that bit to yourself." Levin remarked flatly. "So, did you mend things? Get if all sorted out and tidied up, did you?"

Igor sighed, unphased by Levin's sarcasm. "Is it possible to love and hate someone at the same time?"

Levin pointedly eyed his friend's face in the fire." Yes, I think it is."

"I wish things were different." Igor barely heard Levin's answer so lost was he in his own thoughts.

"We'll you've no scruples murder someone for a time turner and go back and fix it," Levin spat sarcastically now pacing angrily in front of the fire.

Igor smirked. "Rather amoral."

"We'll that's you."

"Not really."

"No? I disagree." Levin crouched in front of the fire to be eyeball to fiery eyeball with his former friend. "You walked out on your family and friends without a thought because of some adolescent narcissistic fit."

Igor became indignant. He'd come here for sympathy and understanding but was receiving nothing but abuse. "Narcissistic?"

"You didn't care about your parents or your brothers and sisters or even me, and you sure as hell didn't care about Nat. Did you ever even wonder what happened to her?"

"Of course I..."

"No you didn't," Levin interrupted him. "You turned her out cold after you promised to take care of her and in a strange country with no prospects and too late to register for school. I thought in a few weeks once the shock wore off you'd come around and at least make sure she was all right but you never did. You're an unchivalrous, self-absorbed bastard!"

Igor tried to speak but only sputtered.

"And then you joined those lying philistines. You recruit children for the devil! You hurt and torture innocents."

"That's a lie." Igor roared so loud several coals popped out of the fire.

"Listen to yourself. You've told yourself so many lies you don't even know what the truth is." Levin stayed on the offensive. "How much do you drink every day?"

"Aye, don't YOU start with me." Igor rolled his eyes.

"Better yet, how much heroin are you doing? Or how many witches have you..."

"None of that matters."

"You're right it doesn't." Levin leaned in close to the fire. "Because no matter how much liquor you consume, or drugs you ingest or witches you ball, you cannot escape the filthy reality you've become."

The coals were motionless as Levin's cutting words sunk in. Levin stood to leave the room but he turned back to deliver his warning. "This conversation is over and if you ever come near me or my family again I'll summon the aurors or cut you down myself and not think twice about it. Your lot will destroy our peaceful way of life for my children and I won't stand for it."

"So I've lost you too?" Igor called after him.

"No, you threw me away," Levin grumbled over his shoulder as he trudged up the stairs to check on his family. He composed himself before he peeked into the boy's room to find them sleeping peacefully. He knew they would go down quickly after a busy Christmas with both his and Fiona's family. Then he went into the bedroom to find Fiona, lovely as ever, changing into her nightgown. He caught a brief glimpse of the back of her, all perfect flesh except for the skimpy silk knickers covering her bum. He sighed, grateful for the beauty and peace that graced his life. While he and Igor had fun in their youth, he couldn't live the way his former friend lived. Family life with Fiona was the only way for him.

"Everything all right?" She asked, coming over to kiss him sweetly.

"Yes, darling, he won't bother us again." He rubbed her arms back and forth, enjoying the feel of her skin.

"I'm sorry. He was like a brother to you at one time. What did he want?"

"A shoulder to cry on. He ran into Nat."

"Oh?"

"Apparently it didn't go well."

"Not surprising."

"He sounded obsessed with her. I'm worried for her safety."

"I don't think Igor would ever hurt her. He was so in love with her."

"Yes, but now he's a junkie and quite unpredictable. I hope she's all right."

Several weeks later an unlikely assembly was gathered in the study of the Lestrange castle waiting for the arrival of the Dark Lord and a few more of his select followers. Rodolphus was drinking heavily and attempting to force liquor on them all. Something bothersome was affecting his mood tonight, though he was tight lipped about his problems this evening, preferring to regal them all with tales of his swashbuckling adventures in a local brothel.

"So when I got there, they said, 'Our apologies, Mr. Lestrange, but your regular witch is occupied. However our newest witch is quite lovely and will be more than accommodating.' Why you should have seen this little whelp; skinny, timid little waif, no tits to speak of. Well I told them I wasn't there to test drive new equipment. Yes, that place is going downhill if you ask me."

"We didn't," Severus drawled in a surly manner, which elicited a chuckle from Lucius. Neither of them were imbibing with the other two men, Severus merely letting his full untouched glass sit before him while Lucius poured his succession of drinks into a nearby potted mandrake. The liquor was producing and amusing result as the leaves were beginning to sway and hiccups could be heard from within the soil.

Rodolphus was oblivious to the barb and ranted on, "I mean we should all be getting a higher standard of ass these days, Death Eater grade ass, and here she is showing me some girl that I wouldn't shag with a muggle dick. Don't take my word for it. Ask Karkaroff. She was pitiful excuse for a professional don't you agree?"

Igor had enthusiastically accompanied him on the night in question but now was uninterested in the conversation, perpetually distracted by his Christmas visit to Natalia and her pointed request. "I found her quite lovely actually," he mused unwilling to disparage the poor thing who was disadvantaged enough in such a horrendous situation.

"Well, you have no standards," Rodolphus barked and took a long swallow of his drink.

Severus rolled his eyes at Karkaroff and decided to harass him for lack of a better occupation. "How many witches have you been with Karkaroff?" That remark drew everyone's attention and they all cocked their ears and watched him in eager anticipation of the answer.

Igor was taken aback by the question. He'd never stopped to think about it. It could be dozens, or it could be hundreds. No, surely not hundreds. That sounded bad. But it was certainly more than dozens. Well over a hundred or perhaps two hundred was more accurate. However he chose not to share this. He began to run some calculations on the over/under; two to three a week maybe one out of five or ten were repeats. His mind processed and calculated while he made facial expressions that outwardly displayed his figuring. Severus grew tired to waiting for the answer to what was a rhetorical question anyway.

"Hmph, that's what I thought. And other than Natalia, do you even remember their names?"

A haze seemed to descend over Igor, random names and faces none matching. What did their names matter? It was like asking Voldemort to name individual muggle victims.

His silence was enough to turn Severus' pent up sexual frustration into anger. "Disgusting! Don't you people get tired of it all? At some point after ejaculation does it cease to be enough?"

"No," all three retorted in unison and then laughed loudly at themselves. Even Igor chuckled wistfully.

"Well it's not enough for me," Severus frowned, finally taking a sip of the liquor. "I want more."

Lucius seemed to snap out of his laughter and suddenly turned serious himself. "Oh, Severus, what's the point? Nothing lasts. I had more once you know. I threw it away with both hands in favor of vanity."

It was Igor's turn to smirk for he knew the love to which Lucius was referring. "How tragic and undeserved I'm sure," he slurred sarcastically.

Lucius stepped towards Igor who was slouched in a large chair with his long legs dangling over the side. "But why do I tell you this? You've done the same thing. Do you ever wonder what could have been?"

Igor swung his legs round and stood immediately, towering over Lucius. "I don't dwell in the past," he snarled.

"No? I wish I could say that. It's the only place I was truly happy."

"You two sods bore me." Igor walked over to the bar to join Rodolphus, however the pop of apparations interrupted them and they were soon joined by Voldemort and Bella Lestrange. Igor was immediately aware of the reason for Rodolphus' bender. Bella gazed adoringly at the Dark Lord and he was now eyeing her back in an openly lecherous manner. His stomach turned in the face of such brazen adultery flouted in the face of them all. There was nothing Rodolphus could do about it. He had to stand there and take it. Igor glanced briefly at Lucius who caught his eye briefly before he looked away.

"I've called this meeting with all of you to discuss a matter that has interested me for some time." His voice was cool and smooth with just the hint of a rasp. His hair was thinning and slicked back away from his face adding an oily quality to is already waxy, chemical appearance. He sat in the chair that Igor had previously occupied. Bella perched possessively on the arm of the chair and put a hand on his shoulder. Igor looked at Rodolphus, whose hand was already shaking. Igor patted it once to get his attention and then shook his head no almost imperceptibly.

"I have intelligence that Natalia Smith, proprietor of The Three Broomsticks is harboring fugitives."

Both Igor and Lucius went white at the mention of Natalia's name by the Dark Lord. Severus' face however betrayed nothing, and as usual, he was cool in his response. "Fugitives, my lord?"

"Infants, children, I'm unsure of who they are but I will be finding out. Lucius," he turned to his platinum minion.

"My Lord?" His voice did not quiver but his lack of color betrayed him.

"You once had a…relationship with Ms. Smith. I want you to arrange a meeting between us. I wish to discuss her latest venture."

Try as he might and though he knew it was foolhardy to intervene, Igor could not let that slide. And against his better judgment, he spoke. "Forgive me, my lord, but Natalia loathes Lucius. I think perhaps she would respond better if I spoke with her."

"Ah yes," Voldemort smiled as much to his amusement, as this unfolded precisely the way he'd planned. "I'd forgotten you were once engaged to her. So many years have passed."

Bella cackled until her Lord looked disapprovingly at her and she clammed up immediately.

Severus rolled his eyes and interrupted. "My Lord, neither of these men have spoken to Natalia in years. I remain particularly close friends with her and I'm certain she will be more cooperative if I act as your emissary. She trusts me. She loathes these two hooligans despite what they may be fantasizing."

Voldemort considered the request of his most trusted follower. "Interesting dynamic and one I will enjoy seeing play out. Very well, Severus, make it so. Arrange the meeting and we will pay Miss Smith a visit. I remember her as well…fondly"

A chill ran down Igor's spine at the way Voldemort said 'fondly'.

After Severus met with Natalia to arrange the meeting for later that night she was a flurry of panicked activity. On her friend's advice she did not move the children. At this point Voldemort was not angry, merely curious and would want to see the entire arrangement. To move them would be seen as an act of defiance or subterfuge for which she might be severely punished. She did however give Roberta, the nanny, the night off and cast a light sleeping spell over all the children to ensure they would not wake up. Then she closed the pub early and began to prepare for Severus to arrive with Lord Voldemort. With a wave of her wand she had the mops gliding across the floor and feather dusters flitting about the furniture. She went into the kitchen and prepared a few trays of meats and cheeses that she could retrieve quickly should he request food. It would be best to keep him fed if need be for hunger was reflected poorly in most people's dispositions. The bar was stocked plentifully as always and soon she had nothing to do but wait. At precisely midnight they arrived.

Severus pushed open the door with a thud and entered first, purposefully striding in with robes streaming behind him. "Natalia," he nodded in her direction and she rose to go welcome her guests.

The Dark Lord entered next and she shuddered as she remembered the last time she'd seen him on that fateful night at the World Cup that changed her life. He still possessed that same waxy complexion and carried himself with an arrogant royal air. His dark hair had receded quite a bit since then and he now slicked it straight back. He glanced around the establishment frowning but nodding in apparent approval. Then his gaze descended upon Natalia.

"Miss Smith, its been some time since our last meeting. I believe the years have been good to you."

Natalia noticed two more hooded forms entering as she curtsied to Lord Voldemort, thugs no doubt present in case she had reinforcements herself. "Good evening, my Lord. How lovely to see you again, I'm so flattered that you remember our last meeting." Years in Slytherin house ensured such gracious statements could be regurgitated without thinking when the need arose.

"I believe you are quite unforgettable. At least that's the consensus in this room. I'm sure you remember my friend Lucius Malfoy," he gestured to one of the forms. Natalia's palms began to perspire as she smiled meekly at Lucius. She was actually relieved to see him for she knew he would go to great lengths to help her if the situation warranted it. Lucius returned her gaze but looked uncomfortable.

"And my friend, Igor Karkaroff." He stepped to one side revealing the other form that was now removing his hood. Igor looked at her stone faced and as much as she loved him, she considered this a complication for his behavior was erratic of late. She could tell from the glaze over his eyes that he was yet again high as a hippogriff. She nodded curtly in his direction and her manner elicited a snicker from her guest of honor.

"Sadly, I know both of them, but thought my meeting was with you and Severus. Do these gentlemen serve a purpose or are they purely ornamental?"

The Dark Lord snickered once again. Natalia looked over at Severus who was glaring at her and she immediately had the feeling that she should not have been so cheeky. She was desperate to change the subject. "Would any of you like some refreshment?"

"A kind offer but one that is not necessary. While the hospitality of the establishment is well known I have not come to partake of your libations. No, my dear, I have come to see where your loyalties lie."

Natalia thought it sounded like a very unpleasant test was about to unfold. "I have no loyalty to a cause. Never been much of a joiner."

"I would like to see these urchins under your care. Where are they?"

"They are upstairs, my Lord. If you will all follow me."

Voldemort raised a hand to stop the others. "I will accompany you but my associates will remain here."

Natalia did not like the idea but had no choice but to comply. "As you wish. This way, my Lord." She showed him upstairs and into the room where the children were sleeping. Her hands were perspiring so much when she reached the door she struggled to open it. Voldemort waived his wand and the door opened with ease.

"Thank you, my Lord," she mumbled nervously

He walked from crib to crib appraising the contents as she looked on in terror. "What about these children? Why would a successful witch such as yourself take up with these indigent creatures?"

"Are you familiar with the Stockwell orphanage?"

"Stockwell?"

"Yes, It's in north London."

"Yes. Yes indeed I do. I spent time there as a boy myself. Muggle orphanage, miserable place."

"Yes, it was quite bleak."

"I know how I wound up there. What about these?"

"Their backgrounds are not confirmed but I have suspicious. Your band of merry men have some undisciplined characters running about spilling their seed into all the willing and half the unwilling. They certainly wouldn't take care of them and they are too powerful to blackmail. That's just one theory but regardless, what else is to be done with them? I couldn't leave them in the care of muggles. They are magical but I do not know their lineage. I've taken them in because the orphanage is, as you I'm sure know, unequipped to handle our kind. I don't think these children should be made to feel different or inferior, when in fact they are rare and exquisite treasures, to be nurtured in our world. I don't want them to be made to feel like a freak as I was." She paused and could tell by his fascinated expression that she was on the right track. "It would be an abomination to have these magical children under the influence of inferiors." As distasteful as those words were, they were necessary.

"So you bring them here to keep them away from muggle influence."

"Yes, my Lord," Natalia cringed, knowing she was going to hell every time she forced herself to call him Lord even if it was in the name of self-preservation.

"Hmmmm, I like that. I myself grew contemptuous with those creatures in my youth. They cannot possibly understand our world." He stepped closer to her. "And what of your lineage, Miss Smith? Do you know who your parents were?"

"No sir." Her voice cracked and she cleared her throat.

"How do I know that your background is acceptable to me?"

"I have a certificate obtained through a blood test. It was necessary for the business." For one she was grateful for Lucius' meddling.

"Really? And where is this dubious certificate?"

"Safely tucked away in Gringotts. I can get it for you tomorrow."

"Why bother?" He approached her and wove his skinny fingers through her hair on each side of her head."

She gulped in fear, he eyes wide and lips trembling.

_"Legilimens_," he hissed and entered her mind. She was able to block him initially and he seemed to retreat a bit. She relaxed for a moment but then he pushed his way through and saw everything he wanted. He saw the night Lucius attacked her, gratuitously replayed though he was already a witness, Igor angrily rejecting her, and saw Lucius presenting her with the forged certificate though he saw nothing to reveal that it was forged. Finally he removed his hands, having seen enough, leaving her gasping. "You've led quite a life in your young years."

"Yes sir" she looked down assuming a submissive posture for he was surely in control and she was helpless to defy him.

"I'll allow it. Only because it furthers our race and doesn't interfere with my plans." He walked out the door and quickly down the stairs. She barely had time to collect herself before she went scrambling after her.

"Malfoy, you are to make a one hundred thousand galleon donation to Miss Smith's purse so she may properly care for these indigents. Severus, come. We have another stop to make. Igor, Lucius...enjoy your evening with this lovely young woman." Voldemort snickered on his way out the door followed by Severus.

The remaining three all breathed a sigh of relief. Natalia groaned as she exhaled out a massive amount of worry with her breath. "I normally don't indulge but I need a drink like you would not believe." Natalia rambled as she closed her eyes, so relieved for Voldemort to be gone she was a little more lucid than usual. "We're a rather motley crew but I'll invite you both to join me."

Fleeting thoughts of a threesome came to Lucius' mind but that would be a hopeless plan and in the event he ever had another opportunity with Natalia, he would not share. No, this would be a fruitless effort so he would have to settle for annoying Igor." I will settle for a cup of tea. Do you still have that lovely blend you so graciously prepared for me not long ago?"

Natalia glared at him. If he had any sense he would leave instead of stirring up trouble. She sneaked a sidelong glance at Igor and saw that Lucuis' remark was having the desired effect on him for he was glaring murderously at his flaxen rival. "Yes, Lucius," she hissed, obviously patronizing him which only bolstered his glee.

"What can I offer you, Igor?"

The sound of his name gently crossing her lips pulled him back from the brink of pouncing on Lucius. Her voice, when not raised in anger toward him as it had been in recent weeks soothed his soul and he felt his muscles start to relax. Not wanting to be any trouble he tried to be as agreeable as possible. "Please don't go to any trouble. Whatever you're having is fine." He smiled snappily at her, feeling awkward after his last few disastrous encounters. To have an argument in front of Lucius would be intolerable.

"I have exquisite Russian vodka that's been through this distillation process five times. It's smooth as silk and quite refreshing with a twist of lemon." The gushing tone of her voice told him she was desperately trying to appear worldly and perhaps wealthy. In the face of all this she was still trying to prove she could rise above her humble beginnings. He could still read her like a book.

"Wheat or grain?" He played along, gazing dreamily at her.

She smiled, "Wheat. Will you join me?"

"Dah," he nodded, the promise of fine vodka pulling his heritage to the surface.

Natalia waved her wand and hastily conjured a cup of tea for Lucius which landed with a shaky clatter in front of him, causing him to flinch. She then took down two of the best rocks glasses and filled them to the top with large chunks of ice then she levitated the ornate glass bottle that looked like some kind of chiseled ice down from the top shelf. She held it up for him to see, obviously proud of the quality. "Have you tried this before?"

Igor, who had an entire case at home knew exactly how precious this vodka was, fetching very high prices. Of course his entire supply was stolen directly from the distributor so he sacrificed nothing for it. He did however remember to mind his manners and not steal her thunder. "No, but I have heard wonderful things about it."

Lucius snickered loudly and they both shot him nasty looks for different reasons. Lucius knew full well that Igor served that at his house, but also knew that if he was foolhardy enough to out Igor that it would be to his detriment.

Natalia poured the liquor into the glasses, squeezed a bit of lemon juice into them and dropped the fruit into the glass. She handed one to Igor who raised the glass to her with a twinkle in his eye. "Shall we toast? To your health."

"And yours as well." He clinked his glass against hers and they both took gratefully long swallows, the welcome reward after a harrowing evening. "Mmm, that's wonderful. I think that is the crispest vodka I have ever tasted, and I have tasted many."

"Thank you. I acquired it last year on a buying trip to Norway. It was quite scarce. Apparently there had been some sort of theft that depleted his supply. So I really had to bargain with the distributor to let it leave the country."

"Really?" Igor let her go on, enjoying talking about a benign subject that would not get him in to trouble.

"Mother of Merlin," Lucius rolled his eyes to the ceiling and clanked his girlish little teacup into its saucer.

"Did you say something, Malfoy?" Igor turned a cold hard gaze on Malfoy, daring him to comment for he was itching for a fight and to best him in front of Natalia would be sweetly satisfying.

Lucius ignored Igor and turned his attentions to Natalia. Her eyes were dancing despite such a trying evening and sadly he knew that he was not the reason. Though time and tribulations had passed between she and Karkaroff, the electricity between them was palpable. Loathing to be at a disadvantage, he decided to bow out gracefully. If left to his own devices Igor would certainly say the wrong thing, do something stupid or even better be unable to refrain from hitting the dragon. He was his own worst enemy and Lucius best asset.

"Sadly I must leave this party early as I have another engagement. Natalia shall I just transfer funds to the usual account?" His words were well chosen once again for Igor narrowed his eyes and a vein became visible on his temple. Lucius had to fight not to laugh in his face. It was terribly simplistic.

"Yes, Lucius, that will be fine." Natalia once again adopted a patronizing tone. "When should I expect it?"

"First thing tomorrow morning."

"That will be helpful, thank you."

"Thank the benevolent Dark Lord," he proclaimed rather dubiously.

Natalia let that ridiculous remark pass without comment and tried to hurry him in his way. "I'll see you out. She took his arm and gently guided him to the door. Purely for effect, he rubbed her hand lightly and whispered in her ear. "I don't think I should leave you alone with such a dangerous character. Are you sure you don't need my protection."

"I think you've made enough mischief for one evening," she hissed.

He laughed loudly. "All right then. The money will be in tomorrow. Call me if you need anything else. And I do mean anything."

Natalia grimaced and opened the door. "Thank you, Lucius. Good night." She swept her arm in the direction of the street to give him the hint.

"Good night. And be careful."

Finally she was able to shut the world out and be alone with Igor who seemed to be in decent spirits. However when she turned around Igor looked like a man to be reckoned with. His eyes blazed and his jaw was tight. "The usual account?" It was less of a question than an accusation.

Natalia did not respond except to roll her eyes and sit down on the barstool beside him. She reached for her glass and took another swallow in preparation for what would surely be a testy conversation.

"So am I safe in assuming that you're now officially his mistress?"

She slammed her glass on the table and snarled at him. I'm not his mistress!"

Igor moved his face closer to hers as he tended to do when needling the truth out of someone. "Then why is he giving you money before tonight and exactly how much?"

Natalia looked down into her drink. "Not that I owe you an explanation, but he is a bit of a business mentor and he helps me from time to time, not often but occasionally."

"I thought you were into this women's lib thing." He gestured roundabout with his wrist which mocked the movement. "You've always been self-sufficient. Why would you take his help, or are you still blackmailing him?"

She scowled at him producing a hard line in her forehead. "Pleasant conversation is impossible with you isn't it? You're always picking a fight. "

"I happen to enjoy getting to the heart of the matter." He grinned and cocked his head to one side, enjoying being on offense for a change. "Don't skewer me just because you can't handle it."

"Oh I can handle anything you throw my way, Karkaroff. This is a pillow fight compared to some of the hell you've put me through." She smiled flatly.

Pillow fight? His mind wandered to the thought of them batting each other with feathered tufts while in the altogether. The very thought of such a reference demonstrated her cruelty. Even in the middle of this terse exchange he found himself wanting her to the point of pain. She was yet another addiction he could not kick. "You don't need him, Natalia."

She ignored him and swirled the ice around in her nearly empty glass.

"You know you don't need him, Kitten." He brushed a little wisp of dark hair behind her ear and felt her tremble under his touch. This only served to embolden his agenda. "Trust me you don't want to be indebted to these people. They will call the favor one day and the price will be dear. He's on the hook for this donation but after that refuse his help."

"Lucius is very powerful. He's been helpful to me in recent years. I need his protection."

Igor became exasperated and roughly put his hands on her smooth cheeks turning her face to meet his gaze. "Your protection is not his job."

"He's the only protector I have." Her voice waivered, betraying the truth in her heart yet again.

"You have me." His impetuous words hung in the air for a moment and he was fearful of saying any more lest he tip the delicate balance a disfavorable manner. Her large almond shaped eyes gazed lovingly at him and she blinked several times, her chest beginning to heave as her breathing quickened. The fact that he could still have that effect on her only heightened his desire.

"Igor," she put her hands on his.

"My Kitten," he sighed while slowly pulling her face to his for a long overdue kiss.

"Igor stop." She pulled his hands down.

"It's okay," he whispered still moving towards her lips and quite unable to stop. "I'll take care of you."

But she pulled her face away. "You can't take care of me, Igor. You can't even take care of yourself."

His countenance turned to stone for he was horrified that at the moment when he was finally able to swallow a large and painful lump of his cherished pride and humble himself before her that she would chose to point out a flaw. That was just like her to mock his sincerity. He'd forgotten that he wasn't the only one afraid of getting to the truth, and how thorny it was to be on the receiving end of such probing.

He turned away, but now it was she who gently cupped his face in her hands. "Darling, I'm worried about you."

"You worry too much." He knew where this was headed; in the opposite direction of where he was trying to go.

"I don't want to but I care about you. Igor, when was the last time you spoke to your family?"

He groaned, frustrated yet again. "A few years ago." He did not tell her that the last time he was home his father caught him using black dragon in his bedroom with a local prostitute and told him to leave and never return until he could be respectful of their house.

"And Levin, he was your best friend. When was the last time you saw him? He's married to Fiona now I hear and they have two little boys. Have you even seen them?"

"Levin and I grew apart." His friend had also ordered him never to darken his door again after Igor stuck his nose in their fire raging drunk not so long ago. Igor was still smarting from his friend's rejection.

"What about your other friends from school? What about Oblonksy?"

Igor knew better than to get anywhere near his former Headmaster Oblonsky when under the influence. "I have new friends now."

"But your old friends are cutting you out of their lives and I'm concerned that these new friends aren't your true friends."

He shrugged, "I have fun with them."

"Fun, wonderful but do they look after you? Are they concerned about your health?"

His lip curled up in annoyance. "My health is fine. "

"How much weight have you lost? My guess is a good thirty pounds since you left school and you didn't have it to lose."

"I'm exercising," he sneered.

"Doing what? When was the last time you were on a broom? You cheeks are gaunt; I notice it under your beard. Your arms are thin and full of track marks. Your veins will collapse at some point. If you keep going the way you are."

"I am not discussing this again." Igor waved his hand as if he was shushing a child.

"You don't have to discuss it, just listen. Igor, I'm terrified for you. If an overdose doesn't kill you eventually, then your body will just start shutting down. Not to mention a myriad of other potential catastrophes that could happen when you're wasted, particularly around the company you keep. The Dark Lord is dangerous enough when one is sober."

"You know no one else bothers me about this. You're the only one who thinks it's a problem." He didn't take Levin's or Sandy's opinion into account.

"No one else loves you as much as I love you."

He froze, though his heart was burning. Could this be true? Before his mind could take it all in, she kissed him softly, just grazing his lips before resting her head against his. He pulled her gently against him taking refuge in this moment that he barely knew he sought.

"Igor, I can help you," she said softly against his chest. "St. Mungo's has a program. We can go there right now."

"Don't be naive, Kitten, can't just walk into St. Mungo's with this mark on my arm." He stroked her back and nearly cried when he smelled lavender again.

"There are other resources. I know people in the werewolf community that can help. They don't go to St. Mungo's for obvious reasons."

"The Dark Lord is not a friend to them and I don't trust them either. I wouldn't take their help."

"Then we'll find another way."

He shook her firmly trying to bring her back to reality. "Stop trying to change me."

"I am not trying to change you. You changed yourself from the man I knew. I just want to help you return to your true self."

"Damn it, Natalia! You said you love me. Can't you just accept me as I am?"

Tearfully, she shook her head no.

It was his worst case scenario, to be unlovable by the one he most desired. He could not be what she wanted him to be. Why couldn't she just accept him as he was? He thought that what love was supposed to be, but then perhaps she didn't love him enough. In resignation, he pulled her close to him again and gazed into her eyes. Then he kissed her gently and walked out the door.

He mindlessly apparated to his balcony and by some miracle of fate did not spilch himself. He stared up at the stars, not wanting to go back into his empty abode when he had been so close to connecting with her again. An epiphany descended upon him and he was petrified knowing what he must do. Woefully, he walked back into his elaborately appointed penthouse and was greeted by his house elf Sandy.

"I'm glad to see you home early, Master. Can I get you something from de kitchen?"

"No," Igor said solemnly. "Come with me. I need your help."

She shuffled after him into his bedroom. He removed his coat and threw it over a chair but not before removing a pot of Black Dragon and throwing it on the bed. Then he went into the bathroom and brought out two more pots and tossed it next to the others. He then went to his closet and pulled two more half empty jars out of other pockets, also tossing them on the pile. "Accio, Black Dragon." Four more small packets flew to his hand from various spots about the room and they were also added to the pile. Then he turned his attention to Sandy.

"Have you been hiding any of my stash?"

Sandy's cheeks reddened slightly.

"It's all right. You're not in trouble. I should thank you. Just tell me are there any more packets in this house?"

"No sir. I flush dem in de loo." Sandy looked up at him in a quizzical manner.

"Humph! Well, you're lucky I didn't catch you but now I'm glad you did." Igor cast his wand over his pile of personal pollution. "Evanesco." He managed to murmur the spell despite the fear that tried to hold the words in his chest. The pots of Black Dragon vanished and dread gripped him quickly and more powerfully than he expected, but he knew what he must do. "Sandy, listen to me."

Sandy drew closer to him but cautiously for his demeanor was grave and she found it a strange sight on her normally jovial master.

"Ward the doors. Let no one in. If anyone comes or sends a message tell them I am out and you don't know where I am. I'm going to get sick, very sick. I may beg you to find me some Black Dragon. No matter what, don't let me have it and don't let me out. I may say some terrible things to you and I'll apologize in advance for that. I don't know how long this may go on. Some people say three days, some people say ten. I've never tried this before so I can't prepare you. I'm sorry this may frighten you, but it's the only way."

She took his hand with her bony fingers and patted the back of it. "We'll be fine. Des is for de best. You make a wise decision. Get in de bed and try to sleep. You may not feel well enough to sleep later."

"Yes. Good idea."

Sandy shuffled out of the room and Igor took a seat on the bed. He was terrified of the sickness that he knew was about to befall him. He went to his nightstand and took out a picture of he and Natalia that was taken in St. Petersburg a few days before their lives imploded. He was reclined on the grass along a river bank; young, smiling and happy. Natalia was cuddled beside him in the warm summer sun tracing the contours of his face with the soft end of a sprig of wheat. He smiled as it tickled him and she leaned over and kissed his nose. He stared at the picture, watching the scene repeat itself over and over. Surely the hope of her was the only thing that could summon the courage deep within him that he would need to get through the next few days. He'd made a mess of his life, straying far from his true self through addictions, women, and loyalty to the Dark Lord that for the first time he was beginning to question. But today he would begin his journey home.


	55. Chapter 55 Cold Turkey

CHAPTER FIFTY-FIVE

COLD TURKEY

Igor had been fearful but proud of himself hours ago when he'd made the courageous decision to kick his increasingly consuming Black Dragon habit, but now he was cursing himself for not holding back just a bit of his stash to get him through the night. He aimlessly wandered around the flat pondering a way to escape but Sandy had placed a room sealing spell on his entire abode, and he found himself securely trapped. He had been unable to sleep, too fearful of the excruciating pain he knew was about out to grip him. Several hours after he returned home his legs began to twitch and kick, the first sign of the rebellion building in his system. The initial symptoms terrified him for he knew what was coming next; nausea, sweat and pain that was legendary. He had not planned on doing this tonight or any other night for that matter, but seeing Natalia and how drawn she was to Lucius as her protector made him physically ill. She belonged to him whether she or that weasel Lucius knew it or not. He recounted over and over in his mind how she essentially told him he was not equipped to protect her; he, Igor Karkaroff not capable of protecting his witch. The very thought was emasculating, and he curled up in a fetal position on his bed under the weight of his own shame.

But she loved him. She'd confessed her heart to him. Oh, the joy and relief he felt at her words was indescribable. "No one else loves you as much as I love you." Those words had the power to push aside all the things he'd been filling his vacant heart with. They would give him the strength he needed to get through the next few days of hideous withdrawal. He would emerge on the other side and then be fit to be her protector. Those words would serve as his true north and lead him home. He drifted off to sleep hopeful in the promise of having her for his own again; the fantasy easing his fears.

When he awoke again he felt like he'd been run over by the Hogwarts Express, twice. Every bone and joint in his body ached and his skin felt like it was being melted off his body. Sandy padded softly into the room with a tray that held a glass and a large pitcher of ice water. The idea of ingesting such a chilly liquid into his body sent goose flesh rippling across his skin. Without asking, she poured him a little bit and put it to his lips. "Drink dis, master. We got to keep you hydrated even if you don wan it."

Obediently he lifted his head off the pillow and took two sips before the weight of the pain in his head caused it to flop back onto his pillow again. The effort exhausted him, and his breathing became labored. The pain was intolerable, and he rolled over to try to get more comfortable but was immediately more uncomfortable. He groaned and rolled over onto his back again. When he did he noticed the sheets were damp from his sweat. The coolness irritated his skin and he groaned again in frustration. "How long have I been asleep?" It took great effort to ask the question and still it came out as a whisper.

"Long time, 'bout 'tirteen hours."

"Ugh, that's it?"

"You specting to sleep longer?"

"I dunno. It's still the first day. That means this pain will get worse before it gets better and it's already terrible."

"Dat's for certain. Sit up and take anoder drink. No sense going tru all dis if you jus gonna die from dyhydration."

Igor managed to prop himself up on his elbows, still wincing from the pain in his neck and back and took a longer gulp this time. He would just have to keep his eyes on the prize at the end of this. It was the only way he would make it. As soon as he finished he fell back onto his pillow again. "Rasputin's robes! Why does this have to hurt so bad?"

"Dat's de boomerang," Sandy remarked casually.

Igor came out of his funk momentarily to raise a surly eyebrow at her. "Excuse me?"

"De boomerang. You use dat garbage to get a good feeling dat you don't have. You get it by artificial means. But sooner or later dat debt gonna get paid wit some bad feelings. So you gonna feel as bad now as you felt good before. It aaaaall come back to you like a boomerang to smack you in de head."

Igor studied her for a moment shuffling about the room in her little turban that concealed Merlin knows what underneath and her little rag dress. While he'd never considered her stupid, he now decided she was far wiser than he ever gave her credit for and was once again grateful to have her about. His head began to pound harder, rebelling against the lofty thoughts he was attempting to process. "I feel like that boomerang has smacked me more than once."

"It's the way of de universe, keeping tings even like dat. Once your body pay de debt for de Black Dragon, you gonna feel good again. Are you ready for something to eat yet?"

The very idea made his insides churn and he shook his head adamantly and immediately regretted the expenditure of energy. "No, no, no. Just turn out de light. Check on me every so often please. I don't know what's in store for me."

"Don't I always? Keep de water by de bed and drink when you can." As she removed the glass and pitcher from the tray to set it on his nightstand she noticed the picture of him and Natalia. "Who dis?"

Igor grumbled, resenting the intrusion.

"She's very pretty. You look very young in dis, 'bout seventeen."

"Dah," he affirmed.

"I never see her at any of de parties you have. She look like better stock dan de witches I see sneaking outta your bedroom in de morning."

"No she wouldn't associate with the lot I run with these days."

"She don't put up wit your rubbish den?"

He snickered and for the first time the pain eased slightly. "No, Sandy. No, she's never been one to put up with my shenanigans. No, not that one."

"You didn't answer my question. Who is she?"

"My reason for living."

"Ahhhhhh, now we get somewhere. She's why you put yourself tru dis, yes?"

"Dah."

"Well, she soun' like good people to me." Sandy handed the picture back to him and shuffled out of the room leaving him gazing at the picture until he mercifully drifted back to sleep.

When he awoke again there was a pot of tea on the nightstand and a bit of toast. Though he had no appetite he propped himself up and took a bite of it. It was dry and unpleasant and his mouth seemed unable to discern any flavor. He poured a bit of tea and took a sip, then spread a bit of jam on the toast and took another bite. The sweetness was an improvement but it was still just sustenance rather than something enjoyable. He forced down half a piece and a few more sips of tea. His body still ached but he could no longer confine himself to his bed. He jumped up and paced the floor, uncertain what to do. He was anxious, full of dread for something unknown. He opened the curtains and sat down in a nearby chair, then began drumming his fingers nervously on the arm. He needed an occupation desperately to get his mind off the pain still increasing within him. He looked down at his rapidly drumming fingers and decided to put them to use on his piano.

He wasn't aware that his room reeked and poorly until he entered another room of the flat and noticed the fragrant incense that Sandy was fond of burning. It was also much cooler in the rest of the flat, and the hair on his chest and arms immediately stood on end, however after almost two days of excessive fever and sweat, it was mildly refreshing. He peeled off his damp undershirt and slung in carelessly on the floor for Sandy to pick up later. The drapes were open revealing a rather ominous looking fog in the evening sky. It reminded him of Hogwarts and he had the urge to play a sad tune, or something violent, or just something. Without thinking he began gently playing the opening notes to Skrjabin's "Black Mass". He'd always found the piece beautifully erratic and consequently quite challenging, but today it seemed to flow so naturally from him. His fingers now found use for their stored energy and he closed his eyes as the music entranced him. For the first time he forgot the pain. Yes, it seemed to ebb away with each note almost hypnotizing him for quite some time before he completed the piece.

"Dat was beautiful." Sandy piped up from behind him.

"Thank you I'll be here all week." Igor smirked as he dismissed the piece and the compliment with a final glissando. He was forever proud of his natural musical ability, though he hadn't played anything of value in front of others in years. At parties he would occasionally, on request, drunkenly bang out some songs for others to sing along to, but he considered that rubbish. To play Skrjabin was a higher calling that few answered. He slouched at the bench vaguely recalling his sloppy rendition of "Moonlight Sonata" the night his lavender girl saved him for the first time before he even knew her name. "Any requests?" He stared at the keys unsure what to play next and no longer feeling inspired. Beethoven was out of the question.

"I don't know any music. Play what you will."

Without thinking he began to bang out a ridiculous song that Rabastan Lestrange always requested. It was tacky and carnival and always elicited laughs and rockus singing from inebriated party guests. "I've got a love-a-ly bunch of coconuts," he sang making a mockery of that life he was leaving behind. "There they are all standing in a row." He'd always hated this song, only playing it when Rabastan harassed him so much that he had to silence him. As he played along he recalled the last time Rabastan was there singing that song when he'd leaned over the open baby grand piano and a little packet of black dragon had toppled out of his pocket and into the piano. Igor had only laughed at the time, not telling Rabastan but considering it payment for having to play such a horrible tune.

Suddenly he was consumed by the thought of relief being inches away from him. Surely it was still in there. Without warning he pounced on the instrument, his knees and feet producing a nightmarish sound as they crashed on the keys.

"What you doing?" Sandy hollered but Igor didn't hear her.

He violently pushed the top of the piano off, ripping it off the hinge so he could get his entire body inside. His seekers eyes quickly scanned it but he didn't see the packet. The strings were in the way so he ripped them up finding new strength in his body at the thought of the instant relief the packet could provide. Strings popped off under the pressure, several snapping him across the face like a whip causing three gashes to open on his cheek, mouth and nose but he was oblivious. He stood up on top and began stamping his feet on the little hammers that once helped to produce such beautiful music.

"No master, why you do dis?" Sandy frantically leaped about the piano not knowing how to stop him.

"YOU!" Igor quickly turned on her. "What did you do with it?" He jumped down and came menacingly toward her.

She backed up, terrified. "Do wit what?"

"The packet. It was in here. I know it. You stole it. Where is it?"

"You probably destroyed it with the rest, you used de 'accio' spell to summon it all."

Igor's mind worked rapidly. Yes, she was right. He'd forgotten. It seemed like ages ago but it was much longer. Certainly now he was unable to let go of the promise of such a soothing dose of the dragon. He would need her help. "Sandy, I need you to do something for me."

"No." She shook her head knowing what he was about to ask

"Now, don't be disagreeable," he drawled in his most charming voice. "You're still my elf and you have to do what I ask you to do."

"Not in dis case. You already commanded me not to listen to you no matter what you say, so I don' have to obey you in dis."

She had him and that enraged him. "Why you little serf! You go out and get it right now before I…" He reached for his wand but realized for the first time that he hadn't had it on him in days. He looked back to see a self satisfied smirk on the little elf's face. "Where's my wand?"

"Put away. I knew this would happen."

"Give it back this instant you insolent little fuck!"

"No! Not till dis' is all out of you. Tink of dat little girl you suffer for. Tink of your own health. I'll not let you do dis again 'specially after you asked for my help."

"Motherfucker! I'll murder you!" He took two steps toward her before she raised her hand

"Incarcerous!" The body binding curse slapped into him, knocking him on the ground where he writhed around unable to free himself.

"Let me out! I command you! Let me out this instant!" He bucked furiously but to no avail.

"Wingardium Leviosa," Sandy mumbled calmly and Igor was lifted into the air above the demolished piano and toward the door of his bedroom.

"Put me down! Put me down this instant! I'll not tolerate insubordination from you!" He ranted away but to no avail and she lowered him onto the bed. Then she magically covered him up, tucking the blankets in on both sides to swaddle him like an infant who needed calming.

"You hush your mouth now," she shouted. "You gonna stay in here until you calm down and learn some manners." She turned to go.

"Sandy, no Sandy, don't leave me here. Don't leave me bound up like this. The pain. I'll go mad."

"You go to sleep; when I know you asleep I come back and release you. When you wake up maybe you not be so angry. I not gonna let you destroy your fine house. You thank me later." She shuffled out the door.

Igor fumed at his current indignity and continued to struggle against his binds. He flopped around like a fish on the deck of a ship, struggling in vain against elfin magic. He rolled onto his side and was once again face to face with the picture of him and Natalia. The sight of it took the fight out of him and now he was once again awash with sadness. For the first time since the day she left, he began to sob. It was not the quiet dignified sob of an aristocrat, but the wailing more liken to the Slavic peasants at the loss of a loved one. He moaned loudly; choking as the over production of snot and saliva conquered his respiratory system. "Natalia…" he cried over and over, loudly as if she could somehow hear him, but she never came. Perhaps she never would. Perhaps this still wouldn't be enough. He grieved loudly for several hours until his body was exhausted and he drifted into a fitful sleep.

Sandy listened at the door the entire time, her little heart hurting for the master she'd grown so fond of. It was hard to watch such a strong man go through such a sickness and become so helpless. Her loyalty was emboldened when she heard him calling for who must be the lovely girl in the picture. Had she known anything about the girl, she would have contacted her for help, for she was feeling overwhelmed by how unruly he had become and worried that she may not be enough to get him through this, but perhaps it was better that she not see him like this.

When his wailing subsided, she opened the door just a crack and found him sleeping. She tiptoed inside and watched him for a moment. His eyes darted around under the lids revealing he was dreaming about something, probably this Natalia he wanted so badly. She loosened his binds and curled up in the chair by the window thinking she should stay close for whatever might befall them next.

He slept for another ten hours and awoke moaning and writhing around in the bed which was now nearly sopping wet from his profuse sweating. "Ahhhh," he groaned. "Sandyyyyy," he pleaded.

She hopped off the chair and took some tentative steps toward him. His normally glossy waves were soaked and plastered to his head. His color was gray and his eyes were hollow. The sickness was getting worse not better and the thought of his behavior becoming worse was frightening.

"It's all right. I won't try to hurt you again. I don't have the strength if I wanted to. I'm sorry, Sandy. I'm so sorry. So sorry…" he lamented his apology over and over like a prayer.

She smoothed the dripping strands of hair off his face. "Is okay. I know you're not yourself jus now. How you feelin'?"

"Bloody awful. I ruined the piano didn't I?"

"It's jus a ting not a person. When you feel better you get anodder one."

"I've destroyed people too, you know."

"Hush now. No sense talkin' bout de past. You jus' focus on de here an now."

"I've killed people," he confessed, more lucid than normal.

"You talkin' nonsense."

"No. Not nonsense. I've tortured people too, used all the unforgivables. I deserve all this and more. I'm garbage. She could never want me if she knew what I've done."

"Master, don go on about such tings. It's not right for me to hear dis."

"You won't take my confession? I supposed it is a bit much for you. It would be too much for her too. She's so far above me you know. No family to speak of and always so worried about that, but it didn't matter to me. She was so precious to me, so treasured. I adored that witch."

"What happened?"

"She lied to me."

"About what?"

"She carried another man's child, a very rich man. Then she tried to blackmail him and so he paid her off to have an abortion and make the scandal go away. She sold her honor, the only thing she had except for my heart. I guess neither was of much value to her."

"I'm sorry, master."

"You know the ironic thing is, for years I've condemned her for selling her honor, but it seems I've given mine away and nothing to show for it. Look what it's got me. What's the use?"

"Once this is over, go to her. If she loved you once…" but Sandy didn't know how to finish that sentence.

"All of our recent interactions have ended so badly. I thought if I could get my head straight again that I could fix things. But as this junk leaves my system I see now that I have made things unfixable, unforgivable." He was just coming to the realization as he spoke the words. His breathing became frantic and sweat began profusely pouring out of him again. Bile began to rise out of his stomach and he scrambled out of the bed, knocking poor Sandy aside as he leapt toward the bathroom. He didn't make it and vomited splattered across the floor just outside the door. The cramps in his gut brought him to his knees and he struggled to crawl to the toilet before vomiting again.

Sandy didn't know what to do for there was little she could do to help him in such a state. For lack of something else, she quickly vanished the sick from the floor and went to his side.

He heaved and heaved into the pot crying in between. "I can't do this. Please Sandy, please go find me a hit. I can't. This will kill me if you don't. It's no use anyway. My reason for quitting doesn't exist. I see that now. Please, I'm begging you to get it for me. I won't make it if you don't."

Sandy was unable to respond other than to hold his hair away from his face and stroke his back. She perked her ears as she heard what may have been a knock at the door. Igor was oblivious for his body was convulsing hard as his body pushed out the poison. "I be right back, master. Let me get you someting." She quickly padded out to the door and heard the knock again. This was not a good development for no one must see him like this. The unsavory crowd would not be sympathetic to his plight.

"Open up, Iggy!" It was Regulus Black. "Come on, open up."

Regulus Black was a man of better character than the rest. He didn't treat her poorly as the others did and he was closer to Igor than the others. She'd even noticed that he would water down her master's drinks if he thought he was getting too drunk. So she took a risk and let him in.

"Oh hello, Sandy. Is Igor about? He was supposed to meet me for the Hollyhead Harpies match today and he didn't show. Not hung over again is he?"

"My master is very sick. He told me not to let anyone in but I'm afraid. I don't know how to help him. I nurse loads of sick wizards in my day but dis is in his head as well as his body. I dunno what to do."

"Has he overdosed?" Regulus stepped inside.

"No, de opposite. He kicking the habit. No dragon since tree days ago."

Regulus observed the wreckage that was once a beautiful black baby grand piano. "Blimey! He must be in a state. All right, where is he?"

Sandy led him toward the bedroom. Before they entered she turned, "I warn you, dis not a pretty sight."

Regulus winced when the smell of sweat and sick hit him and he pulled a silk handkerchief from his pocket to calmly cover his nose and mouth. "Well well well, I see you're having a lovely evening," he announced as he entered the bathroom.

"Regs! Oh, bless Rasputin! Regs, I need some dragon, please just a hit. Do you have some?"

"You know I don't touch that rubbish, been warning you for years about this."

"Please, go get me some. Please. You can help me."

"More dragon won't help you lad. That's why you're in this mess."

Igor did not respond for another heave gripped him and he vomited again.

"Merlin's beard!" Regulus sat down on the side of the large bathtub watching in disgust. "So what was the tipping point that made you want to quit? I thought you were rolling merrily along."

Igor wiped the vomit off his chin with his bare arm. It would not do to tell Regulus anything. He was with them, and the information could be used against him. He didn't respond, but merely rested his head on the edge of the toilet seat, too exhausted to be humiliated by such a posture.

"No? Not sharing? Well it matters not, so long as you are doing it. It seems you've frightened your house elf."

"Mmmm," Igor groaned. "It was beyond my control I assure you."

"What can I do for you?"

"Leave," Igor waved him away. "This is bad enough without an audience. My body is shutting down. I can feel it Regs. I'm not going to live through this. I'm not even sure I want to. Hell has to be a better place than this."

"You're talking nonsense," Regulus replied rather dismissively for he didn't want to play into the melodrama. "Death from detox is very rare."

"Leave. Now. Just let me go. I'm giving into it. There's no more fight in me."

Regulus looked over at Sandy who silently motioned him out of the room. When he was back in the bedroom she shut the bathroom door and tiptoed over to the nightstand. She picked up the picture of Igor and Natalia and handed it to Regulus. "Do you know who dis is?"

"Yes, of course. It's Natalia Smith. She was in Slytherin house and was engaged to Igor at one time before he mucked that up."

"He keeps talking about her. Says that's why he's quitting. Says she demands it."

"Really?" Regulus cocked his head to one side. "No surprise. She's no nonsense and lately he's all nonsense."

"I'm worried he might not have de strength to get tru dis. He's been terrible and getting worse with each hour. Do you tink she would come to him? He needs her badly."

Regulus sighed heavily. "I don't know. I was there when he ran into her and he was a right foul git. She was heartbroken. I don't know."

"But if she ever loved him she must help him now. My master couldn't love a woman so cold that she would turn her back on a dying man."

Regulus rolled his eyes. "I don't think he's going to die. Igor always was dramatic."

"We have to try. Please, he needs more help than I can give."

"All right then. You're a good elf, Sandy. I'll stay with him. You go apparate to The Three Broomsticks. It's a pub in Hogsmeade. She's the owner. Go in and ask for her, and tell no one except her why you are there. Speak with her directly, no messages. If she's not there, wait. If you wait more than an hour come back and I'll go out and search for her. Tell her Igor is gravely ill."

"Yes, Master Black." Sandy wasted no time getting herself to the pub. It was a busy Saturday night and the place was packed with people who were too drunk to even notice her shuffling in around the vicinity of their kneecaps.

"Roxanne, get someone to clean up that table in the corner, I need to seat another party. Merlin's Beard! I've only got one wand you know!"

Sandy recognized the witch barking orders from behind the bar as the girl in the picture. She was busy pouring pints for jolly patrons. When she handed a foamy pint to a handsome, long haired wizard at the end of the bar he grinned and whispered something in her ear. She laughed heartily, "In your dreams, Sirius." Sandy had heard that name before and now noticed the resemblance between this man and Regulus. Desperately she hoped that Natalia hadn't taken up with this man, for Igor's heart would disintegrate at such news. She had no time do discover that truth now however and began to make her way to the rail so she could address her master's love.

A beautiful blonde witch with an athletic build and attired in the latest style of robes threw an arm around Sirius. "Cousin, are you harassing Nat again? How many times do you need to get knocked off your broom before you learn to fly on someone else's pitch?"

"There's enough of me for all the pitches…and the witches…and the..."

"Watch it, Black!" Natalia cast him a disapproving look. "I've tossed you out of here before. Don't make me do it again."

"Yes, mother!" He smirked, and turned his attention to a group of men playing wizard darts on the other side of the room.

"Sorry, Nat," the blonde apologized. "I'll take him out of here if you need me to."

"Oh no he's fine. I can handle him." Natalia laughed.

"Natalia Smith?" Sandy began her address.

"Yes?" Natalia and the blonde looked down at her.

"May I have a private word with you?"

"Who are you?"

Sandy looked at the blonde, then back to Natalia. "I'll tell you in private, please."

The blonde rolled her eyes and walked over to Sirius and his friends who were laughing loudly at something.

Natalia pulled her over to a less rowdy side of the bar. "It's not too private but I'm far too busy to be away for a second. State your business."

"My name is Sandy. I'm the house elf to Igor Karkaroff."

Natalia inhaled sharply. "Oh, Merlin, what's wrong? Has he been arrested? Where is he?"

"He's sick mam."

"Sick?" Her voice cracked and she crouched down to be eye level with Sandy. "What do you mean? How sick? Sick with what? Has he taken too much dragon?"

"No mam. He's detoxifying his body, but it's bad. He's getting worse all the time. He keeps talking about you."

Natalia choked. "About me?" She squeaked.

"Yes. Please come with me. Master Regulus said I could come ask you. Please miss, he's in a bad way."

Natalia didn't answer her but ran across the room to the blonde and pull her away by the arm.

Sasha nearly spilled her beverage. "Hey, what's the big idea?"

"Sasha, I need your help."

"What? What's the matter?"

"I have to go. I have to go now and I can't explain. Tell Roxanne she'll have to run the pub tonight. The night nanny is upstairs with the children but I may not be back by morning. I may not be back for several days. I need you to see to the children."

"The children? What, me change nappies? You can't be serious."

"No that's me!" Black piped up from the corner.

"Hush up!" Natalia hissed then turned back to Sasha. "Please, just do this for me. Please. There's no one else."

Sasha examined her for a moment; seeming realizing this was not a frivolous request. "Fine, I'll do my best but where are you going?"

"I have a friend who's very ill." Natalia turned to go but Sasha pulled her back with a death grip on her arm.

"Is it Severus?" she asked, her face as sober as the grave.

"No."

Sasha exhaled loudly, and then gulped for more air.

"It's Igor." Natalia locked eyes with the woman and there was an unspoken understanding between them.

"Go!" Sasha released her. "Go now and don't worry about anything here. I'll take care of things as long as you need me too. Just go to him."

Natalia nodded. She took Sandy by the hand and they weaved their way through the crowd to the street outside. "Take me to him." With that, Sandy grabbed her hand and apparated them directly inside the Karkaroff flat.

The first thing Natalia saw was the demolished piano. "Merlin's nightgown! What happened here?"

"He had a fit."

Natalia's mouth was still agape as she took in the expensive surroundings on the way to the bedroom. The stench hit her as it did Regulus earlier, but her reaction was not as dramatic after a year of changing muddy nappies for four children. She saw the drenched sheets on the bed all tangled about. Then she heard a loud grunt from the bathroom as Igor struggled with dry heaves. She walked with purpose to the room and opened the door to find Igor kneeling in nothing but his boxers before the porcelain toilet and hanging onto it for dear life.

"Oh my God!" She fell to the floor beside him, wrapping her arms around his cold and clammy back. "Oh Igor, my poor darling."

He seemed to have difficulty realizing it was her for he blinked and breathed heavily. "Na..Nat..al..ia." His body shivered shook uncontrollably.

"It's okay baby, I'm here." She reached up and ripped a towel down from the rack and threw it over his back, rubbing it hard to get circulation going. "I'll take care of you. It's going to be all right."

"I'm doing what you asked." He mumbled weakly. "You wanted me to quit so I'm quitting. I quit that night. I'm doing this because it's what you wanted. I can't do anything else."

"Shhh, don't try to talk, darling."

Regulus blushed at such a private display and quietly tiptoed out of the room unnoticed by either of them.

"I'm scared." He looked up at her with the eyes of a little boy, and she couldn't help but pull herself closer to him. "I don't think I can do it. No strength." His body seized again but in a nod to his ego, nothing was regurgitated in front of her.

"Yes you can. I'm with you know."

"I can't do this without you, Kitten." He gripped her sleeve, bunching up the fabric.

"You don't have to. We'll do this together." She kissed his forehead softly. "I'll take care of you. Give me one second." She walked out into the bedroom to find Regulus and Sandy looking anxiously at her. "Sandy, when was the last time he's eaten?"

"He push de food away. Not much to drink either."

"Well, let's keep trying. Go make...mashed potatoes. And make them from scratch no short cuts, it makes them taste like glue. Not too much butter either, his stomach is delicate. Once you put the potatoes on, get back in here and change these wretched sheets. They smell like rubbish."

"Yes mam." Sandy shuffled away relieved to have someone else giving orders for she was not accustomed to it as an elf.

"Regs, I need you to fetch Severus."

"I don't think that's a good idea. No one else should know about this for his own good."

"I didn't ask for your opinion. I trust Severus. Igor needs medical attention and we can't call a regular healer because of who he is. Perhaps Severus can give him something to help him through the rough spots. Tell him I need him. I know he'll come."

"Very well." Regulus walked out into the hall and apparated.

Natalia went back into the bathroom to find Igor trying to stand on legs as wobbly as a newborn colt's. "Where do you think you're going, love?"

"I thought you were leaving. I heard someone disapparate."

"That was just Regs. Sit back on the floor before you hurt yourself."

She turned on the water to the bath and hot water began pouring out of four gold faucets. While the tub was filling she waved her wand. "Accio candles!" Three candles came floating into the room. She grabbed them and sniffed each one to find they were all the familiar scent of lavender similar to the soap she'd used since childhood. She looked at him and he nodded weakly. She set them about the room and lit them to mask the smell of sick in the air.

"Now let's get you into the tub so we can warm you up." She helped him stand. "Take your skivvies off."

Even in his weakened state he was prideful enough to be horrified at the thought, for his body was not cooperating and he couldn't vouch for the state of the inside of his pants. He remained stubborn.

"Oh for Merlin's sake, Igor," Natalia admonished but softly. She flicked her wand and the potentially offending skivvies were vanished.

He flinched a bit, feeling exposed and vulnerable.

"Really now, you used to like it when I did that," she teased.

Igor chuckled softly. "The honeymoon is over now, sweetheart. Surely you've noticed." He leaned on her for much needed balance.

"Not so sick that you can't be cheeky I see."

"Never." He eased himself into the tub already feeling better now that she was here and bantering easily with him. "Ahh," he groaned in pleasure as the warmth began to sooth his aching muscles.

When he was settled, she took a soft washcloth and dipped it in the warm water. Then she dabbed it lightly on his face, cleaning the dried blood on his skin. "Care to tell me how this happened?"

He recalled his embarrassing display. "No."

"You were always getting into scrapes."

"Some things don't change."

The blood was stubborn after being there for many hours. Natalia gave up and dipped the cloth back in the hot water. "Here, now hold this across your face for a few moments. I'm going to wash your hair."

"Mmmm," he groaned and reclined a bit. She took a cup and poured water over his hair before lathering him up. Her fingertips felt like heaven on his scalp. She was gentle and thorough and it occurred to him that she washed his hair in the same manner that she used to make love to him. If he was just a little bit healthier he would have pulled her into the tub with him and enjoyed the feeling of her soft wet flesh. He knew he was lucky she was here at all and in a rare moment of self denial, refrained.

"All finished," she said with a quiver in her voice. What could that quiver mean? "Dunk your head under so we can get you rinsed. Igor obeyed. When he emerged, she took the washcloth back and was able to properly clean his face, taking particular care with the corners of his eyes and behind his ears as his mother used to do. "Do you want to soak for a while or go back to bed? Sandy's changed the sheets and laid out some clean pajamas. She's making you some mashed potatoes too if you're hungry."

"I love mashed potatoes."

"I remember," she smiled. "Ready to get out?"

"Dah, I can do it myself if you want to check on Sandy. She's never quite mastered English food."

"All right. Do you want me to help you out?"

"No, I'm fine."

"Okay. I'll be right back."

Igor dressed and eased back into the bed. Ah, what was it about clean sheets that was so wonderful? It was the simplest thing but he loved getting into a bed with clean sheets. There was nothing more soothing. Natalia entered with a tray holding a large pot of tea and a steaming bowl of mashed potatoes.

"Are you going to be a good boy and eat or do I have to force feed you."

"No, I'm suddenly ravenous." He grabbed the spoon and shoved a large bit into his mouth.

Natalia smiled remembering his horrendous table manners which she decided to excuse tonight. She tidied up the room a bit and moved the candles from the bathroom to the bedroom while he ate. When he finished he pushed the tray aside, and reached for the water still on his nightstand from earlier. He chugged the entire glass.

"Goodness, shall I fetch more water?"

He shook his head yes and she acted on his wish. His legs began to twitch and his fingers to drum again with pent up energy again. She returned with the water and offered it to him but he declined, now antsy again.

"You know Igor, you probably would do better with some distraction. Shall I read aloud to you?"

He considered her request and nodded. His mind needed something to focus on other than his own plight and the maddening curve of her hips.

"Let's see what's on your shelf." She walked over to peruse the books on his shelf. "You have the complete works of Jane Austen. Have you actually read them?"

"No."

"Then why do you have them?"

He'd gotten them to make witches think he was sensitive and so they would have something to read while he went to the guest room to ball another. Disgusted by his own lecherous plotting, he sank deeper into the covers and ignored her question.

"I don't want to know do I?"

He shook his head.

"Moving along, ah the Kama Sutra. Guess I don't have to ask why you have that. Probably read it cover to cover I reckon."

He shrugged.

"Would you like me to read that to you?"

"You mean to torture me don't you."

Natalia chuckled. "No, but it's nice to know I can." She cast a backward glance at him. Áh, hear we go, _Return Of The Native _by Thomas Hardy; beautiful prose, lovely characters and long as time. This should get us through the night." She pulled up a chair and began the first chapter. It was a lengthy description of an English heath at sunset that he would have found monotonous if not for the charming and familiar lilt of her voice. When the first chapter was complete, she marked the page and shut the book. "Would you like some nibbles form the kitchen? The potatoes seem to be staying down. Or maybe some hot chocolate?"

"All I need is before me." He held out his hand to her. She placed her hand within his and watched his fingers close around hers. He tugged gently in an attempt to coax her into bed beside him and she obliged. "Stay with me please, Kitten," he whispered as she nestled in beside him. His arms wound round her thin frame as she nuzzled her face in his chest. He chose not to think about his current plight but instead to recall the first night they slept like this; the night of their first date, The Yule Ball. His pain eased long enough for them to drift off to sleep in each other's arms.

_AN: Hello to all and thanks for following the story. I hope you liked this chapter. Igor is having a rough go at the moment but don't fault him too much. Addiction is a terrible sickness that isn't easy to abolish out of your life. I don't claim to be an expert in the subject but I am a strong supporter of those who try to kick the habit and those who help them. If any of you are struggling, I hope you can find the strength to get clean. Peace..._


	56. Chapter 56 Brown Sugar

CH 56

Brown Sugar

Natalia awoke in the early morning just as a bit of light was beginning to peak beyond the fringes of the blackout curtains that blighted the window. She found herself wrapped in Igor's weakened arms, lying in his bed and smiled in the knowledge that no matter what was happening to him, there was no place on earth she would rather be. His face bore a peaceful expression as he slept; lips slightly parted, his chest ebbing and flowing with his breath and his expression sweet and blameless like a young lad's. She snuggled closer to him and though he didn't appear to awaken, his arms wound just a little tighter around her. Watching him sleep, she simply stayed in his embrace, enjoying the moment until she heard Sandy tiptoe softly into the room and whisper to her.

"Mister Snape is here, mam."

"Oh." Although she had summoned him, she was now caught off guard and knew he was going to disapprove of her being involved in this situation. Friendship with Severus came with a heaping helping of judgment that was shoved upon people like vegetables on a truculent child, and was just as unpleasant sometimes. The dread of his impending reprimand made her squirm a bit. "Tell him I'll be right there," she hissed, and Sandy left the room as quietly as she came.

Natalia began slowly extracting herself from her beloved's embrace so as not to wake him, but before she was completely free she felt his hand tighten possessively around her forearm. "Where are you going?" The groggy whisper was weak but its earnest quality melted her heart.

"Not far, darling. Severus is in the other room. He's here to help you."

A pinched expression formed on his face, then turned into a yawn. "How does he know?"

"I sent for him."

"You did what?" He propped himself up on one elbow, now wide awake and slightly panicked. "Natalia, you have no idea how close he is to the Dark Lord. He could bury me."

"For what? Getting clean? If anything I would think you would be viewed as better equipped to serve him, not that I want him to have the best of you. Igor, he has a knack for healing. I just want him to check you over." She smoothed the sleepy hair out of his face hoping to smooth away the worry lines along with it. "He may be able to ease your pain."

He shook his head and yawned again. "It's not a good idea. I don't want him to know what I'm doing."

She shrugged for lack of another avenue. "Cat's out of the bag now I'm afraid."

Igor scowled at her for a moment, obviously not convinced. "All right then. I guess I have to face him like it or not. Let me get myself together." He yawned a third time which Natalia found odd for it didn't seem to fit the moment.

"Fine, I'll go see him first."

Then she tiptoed out of the room, still in her clothes from the night before with bare feet and bed head. When she shut the door and turned around, she found her face in a broad, darkly robed chest.

"What the hell are you doing here? Have you gone mad?" Severus growled at her in a protective, fatherly manner.

"Shhh," she waved him quiet and pulled him away from the door and into the other room. "He's finally calm after a very rough night, so don't you dare go upsetting him," she hissed.

"Calm? Lying in wait is more like it," Severus sneered at her naiveté. "Do you ever learn your lesson?"

After years of friendship with Severus she was hardened enough to give it right back to him when she felt he deserved it. "If we are going to discuss toxic infatuations I've got quite an earful to give you too, Severus."

That retort was predictably met with tightly pursed lips and haughtily arched eyebrows as Severus found himself unwilling to broach the subject of his own dysfunction. So he skipped his editorial in favor of a more practical occupation. "So what sexually transmitted disease would you like me to cure him of?"

"Very funny."

"I wasn't joking and if you think I was you'll probably be in need of the same cure."

"For your information, he's getting himself clean."

Surprise was obvious, for Severus did not have a snappy comeback for her. "No more Dragon?"

"No more Dragon."

"Since when?"

"Three or four days ago."

"Well which is it? Three or four? It makes a difference on how I should help him you know."

"Sandy can tell you more. She's been with him most of the time but yesterday it got much worse. Regulus happened by and he sent her to fetch me from the pub."

They were interrupted by the terrifying crash of broken glass and a loud thud from the bedroom. Natalia immediately raced in with Severus right behind her to find Igor collapsed in a heap just inside the bathroom door.

"Bloody hell, Igor what's happened?" Natalia tried to rouse him but to no avail. She turned him slightly to find a fresh wound on his forehead from impact with something.

"Be careful. There's glass everywhere." Severus swirled his wand and the glass levitated from the floor, came together and reformed the drinking glass that Igor kept on the shelf near the sink. "He must have had this in his hand when he went down."

"What was in it? Some kind of potion."

Severus rolled his eyes. "Water." He's just weak, Natalia; it takes a tremendous amount of energy for a body to rid itself of this rubbish. He probably got light headed and fell. Move, let me see to him."

Natalia moved slightly but not too far away from him. Her hands remained on his shoulder.

Severus slapped both cheeks roughly. "Wake up!" Igor's eyes clenched shut even tighter, then released but didn't open.

"Come on, wake up!" Severus slapped his cheeks again and Igor's hand came up instinctively to shield himself from further blows.

"Stop it, Severus!"

"Enough of your mollycoddling! He could use a smack in the mouth once in a while," Severus voice crackled with impatience.

"If you slap him one more time, I'll slap you back myself. Now, stop it!" Natalia tried a softer approach, rubbing his back between his shoulder blades. "Igor, darling, can you hear me?"

He groaned and tried to prop himself up on his elbow. He blinked several times and shook his head. "What happened to me?" His voice was a sleepy mumble.

"You passed out I'm afraid. Can you sit up?"

"Hmmm," he hummed and rubbed his head. "I feel a little concussed."

"Probably hit your unusually large head," Severus cracked yet again.

"Ugh," Igor groaned and looked at Natalia. "Of all the people you could have called."

"Stop it, both of you. Severus help me get him back to bed." Between the two of them, they helped Igor back up to his feet but he shrugged them both off, insistent that he could walk back to be by himself.

"Natalia, go fetch him some pumpkin juice or something along those lines while I examine him. He looks a bit dodgy."

"All right then." Natalia scurried off to the kitchen and prepared a tray of juice, cups and some scones that Sandy was just pulling out of the oven.

"How de Master doing today, mam?"

"Much better. Thank you for making these. He needs to keep his strength up." She hurried back into the room just as Severus was finishing up.

"We'll, you're over the worst I think. However the pain will not totally relent for several more days it may have some unpleasant spikes as well. I can give you a pain relieving potion but there are risks and some people find themselves kicking one addiction only to form another. It is however a more socially acceptable one." Severus' mouth was composed into a tight line. He obviously found addicts to be derelict rather than ill.

Natalia reached for the potion. "Maybe you should leave that with me. I can make sure I meter out the dosage in a safe manner."

But Igor held up his hand and shook his head adamantly. "No! I am not taking anything. I've lived through the worst I can take it. Abstinence is best"

Severus arched a snitty eyebrow at him. "We'll there's a word I never thought I'd hear out of your mouth."

"What a charming bedside manner you have."

"Alright you two, that's enough. How many times do I have to reprimand grown men? Severus besides additional potions, is there anything else he should be doing?"

"Not much to do other than flushing this out of his system. Make sure he gets plenty to drink. Make sure he eats. A hot bath will help ease the pain in his muscular system."

"I'll go draw one right now." Natalia immediately went into the bathroom to start the water running.

Severus huffed in annoyance watching her step so lively to help this man who, in his omniscient opinion, didn't deserve her. He glared back at Igor who returned the look with a smirk and raised eyebrows, taunting him. Severus glanced quickly over his shoulder to find Natalia momentarily occupied. He then leaned in menacingly close to Karkaroff. "Don't…hurt her…again," he drawled slowly. Karkaroff narrowed his eyes but did not respond while Severus pulled away.

Natalia re-entered the room. "Igor, the water is running. If you want to get in the tub, I'll bring you your coffee. Do you need me to help you up?"

"No, darling, I'm fine." Igor, still naughty even in his weakened state decided to lay it on thick in front of Snape, just for sport.

Severus rolled his eyes again while one corner of Igor's mouth turned up in a self-satisfied smile. The only thing more wonderful than Natalia's devotion was Severus' annoyance. Despite the slippery slope they were both treading on these days, Igor still genuinely liked Severus. He saw much of himself in the reserved man in the way he ran from what was best for him.

Natalia looked back and forth between the two men. "Did I miss something?"

"Not at all. " Severus was suddenly composed. "I'll just be going."

"Severus," Igor held out his hand, now serious.

Severus reluctantly shook his hand.

"Thank you."

Severus nodded curtly and left the room with Natalia following. "Can you stay for breakfast?"

"No I have to go. So while you're shacked up here with this lethargic Lothario, who may I ask is watching the children?"

"Sasha."

"Sasha?" Severus was suddenly so loud it made her jump. "Bloody hell woman! Have you gone mad?"

"No. I've been friends with her for years. She can be quite the mother hen. I'm sure they are fine."

"You say that like you haven't even checked on them."

"I don't want her to think I don't have any confidence in her. The night nanny is there and the rest of the staff will pitch in."

"She's a spoiled little princess. She'll have no idea what to do with one baby, much less four of them!"

"Oh, I forgot what an expert on child rearing you are. If you're so concerned, you go check on her. I'm staying here."

"Fine," Severus huffed. "Someone has to be responsible while you're having your romantic reunion."

"Oh, for Merlin's sake, it's detox not Pride and Prejudice. If you can't be civil, then be off with you." She waved him towards the door but he didn't move.

"Natalia, just be careful. You remember what happened last time. He needs you now but at his core he remains the same man that cast you off when you offended his vanity."

"Severus, my eyes are wide open, but thank you."

He snorted a disgusted response and then went to check on the children. He was sure to find yet another mess he would need to sort out. Sometimes he felt that other than the Dark Lord, he was the only sensible person on earth. He watched all his associates make one stupid mistake after another particularly when it came to the things they would say and do before their master. All of them were more focused on improving their position rather than furthering their cause. As a result, Severus was now the most trusted of all of them, for he put his own needs last. He was rewarded with favor, wealth, power and when they were carousing, second choice of the women after Voldemort made his pick, usually Bella. However this elevation in his status was coming with unprecedented arrogance and when he entered The Three Broomsticks he went upstairs without a word to anyone that he should have asked, and went to the room he knew to be the nursery. He sighed heavily before he opened the door, dreading the debacle he was certain to find; Sasha, disheveled and yelling at the children, room a mess, smelling of unchanged nappies and snot. But when he opened the door he found quite a different scene.

Sasha was sitting cross legged in a circle with three of the children. She wasn't dressed to kill as she usually was. She was barefoot in a pair of faded jeans that looked like they belonged to a man. She wore a baggy white men's undershirt with the sleeves pushed up on her shoulders. Her hair was pulled into a pony tail and her face was free of cosmetics and glamour spells. He realized for the first time, that she was naturally, a beautiful girl, and that realization stopped him dead in his tracks.

The fourth child, Donald was toddling around the outside of the circle tapping the others on the head and squeaking, "Duck, duck, duck, duck, GOOSE!" When he said 'goose' he tapped one of the little girls on the head and she jumped up and ran around the circle chasing him, much to the delight of the others who were squealing and clapping. Sasha was laughing when she looked up and met his eyes. The look on her face was pure joy and it occurred to him that few people were ever actually glad to see him these days.

"Oh look children we have a new friend!" Sasha's eyes were as bright as a spring morning when she held out her hand to him. "This is Mister Snape."

"Hi," a few of the children managed to mumble a greeting but they all looked intimidated and one of the little girls even scooted herself closer to Sasha. _Stupid prats. _

"Let's make a little room for our new friend." Sasha shifted closer to the little girl who was practically on her lap now and made enough room for him. For some reason he did not know, he obliged her and reluctantly joined the circle sitting beside Sasha. She smelled nice. That he did notice before the shrill and grating game began again

The braver of the two little girls who was in goofy looking green and navy jumper, began going around the circle as the little boy had. "Duck, duck, duck, duck, GOOSE!" Predictably, she chose Severus as the next goose eliciting a roll of the eyes as the girl took off running around the circle screaming her tea-kettle-whistle-of-a-little-girl scream. Severus remained seated and stone faced.

"Go on, Sev!" Sasha gave him a friendly shove to the shoulder.

"Surely you jest'" he said flatly.

"No! You have to catch her." She pushed him gently with both hands trying to cajole him into playing. "Come on, they're kids!"

Severus huffed indignantly but took out his wand. He waved it in the direction of the little girl and hoisted her into the air much to her surprise. The other children gasped and her eyes grew wide as saucers but she then squealed with glee and clapped her hands together. "I fly! I fly!" She squeaked while spreading her arms wide like wings.

Sasha turned to Severus with a forced scowl, for it was hard to keep a straight face when he exercised his dry wit. "Very funny, Severus."

He raised a sardonic eyebrow at her and her scowl immediately broke into a laugh. "Severus, you have a delightful sense of humor. I adore it."

"Tell no one." He pulled his mouth into a tight flat line and looked back at the airborne little girl embarrassed by Sasha's brash compliment and unaccustomed to attention from the fairer sex that he didn't pay handsomely for.

"Never," she laughed then softly added, "I want that for myself."

He felt his neck redden and was grateful for the distraction of the other children jumping up and clamoring for his attention. "Me next, me next," they shouted.

"All right now, he can't do everyone at once. Let me help." She waved her own wand and sent Curt floating up into the air. He giggled and flapped his arms. The other two pouted and continued to protest, "Now me! Me next!"

Severus held a hand in their direction and they were both soon off their feet and joining the others three feet off the ground.

"Wandless magic!" Sasha's tone was only half mocking. "I am impressed."

Though his intent had been to shut the little brats up, the thought of impressing such a lovely girl gave him a strange feeling inside. He didn't know the meaning of it, but it wasn't unpleasant. However he had no time to dwell on it for they were interrupted by one of the waitresses from the pub who entered the room without knocking.

"Lunch is re...blimey! What's going on in here?"

"Oh just having a little fun, Roxanne. This is my friend, Severus."

Roxanne eyed him rudely. "We've met," she snapped.

Indeed they had met, repeatedly; once in the alley behind the pub, once in a bathroom stall, once on a woodsy trail near the forbidden forest. Roxanne met lots of wizards after hours but while it was well known among local wizards who fancied women of ill repute, Sasha seemed oblivious or pretending to be. Looking at the bedraggled woman before him next to the naturally lovely Sasha made him regret his lack of standards, and he became increasingly uncomfortable; losing focus and nearly dropping one of the children.

"Roxanne, can you please take the children downstairs? I just want to tidy up the nursery." She and Severus gently lowered the children who then scurried out the door with Roxanne, who cast a nasty backwards glance at Severus before shutting the door behind her.

Sasha began picking up scattered blocks and tossing them into a nearby basket, while Severus remained sitting on the floor, too tired after a late night and an early morning to get up. He reclined on two elbows and stretched out his legs in front of him.

They were silent for a while until Sasha finally spoke again. "Sorry to disappoint you today but Natalia isn't here."

"I know." He stretched his neck from one side to the other, trying to release some pent up tension that had accumulated. "I saw her earlier this morning."

"Oh?" A quizzical look crossed her face but he couldn't read her. "How is Igor?"

"Humph," Severus rolled his eyes. Of course she was interested in her old boyfriend. It irritated him for many reasons. "He's better off than he deserves. That's certain."

Sasha laughed. "We'll you know Iggy, he could fall in a pile of dung and come up smelling like a rose. So, I guess Natalia must have sent you to check up on me?" Finished with the basket of blocks, she moved on to folding some blankets and storing them in the cribs.

"No, she has the utmost confidence in your abilities." He watched her go about her domestic tasks, enjoying seeing a side of her that he hadn't thought existed; a useful one.

"But you didn't," she remarked flatly.

"I didn't say that. Can't I drop by for a visit?" The whiney defensive quality in his voice sounded so Hufflepuff it nauseated him and he cleared his throat to cleanse it.

"You _can_ drop by to see me, but you never actually _have_."

"Did you want me too? Funny, I saw you at your brother's wedding not too long ago and you were too busy to talk to me that night." The venom in his voice was just below the surface. He was still smarting from his perceived slight that night.

When she turned around abruptly there was a flash of anger in her eyes. "I'm never too busy to talk to you, Severus."

"You were that night. You danced with every wizard there." Pretending to examine a watercolor landscape on the wall was all he could do to appear uninterested in this conversation though his pulse was quickening. "Except me."

"I wanted to dance with you but you didn't ask me, you git."

He looked back at her, relieved to find his excuse. "You know I don't dance."

"Yes, yes," she huffed while picking up a large stuffed rabbit and stretching to put it on the shelf on the other side of Severus while he made no effort to get out of her way. "You have loads of rules for yourself don't you." As she reached across him her breasts were less than an inch from his face and separated by the thinnest white material that did not conceal the lacey pale pink outline of her bra. What would it be like to touch them again? He'd touched them once in a drunken fumbling at the boathouse one night that ended in a humiliating rebuff. What would it be like to make love to a witch like this? Sasha was a lady, but one with a little fire in her, nothing like the Death Eater groupies he availed himself of on the rare occasion when he was so backed up he couldn't stand himself.

Mercifully, she pulled away from him and went over to the changing table and began tidying it up. This gave him the opportunity to ogle her bum. He'd always wished he'd not blown it that night they were both drunk and randy in the boathouse. While his perfect and sweet Lily would always be his first and only love, Sasha was his first lust. Such repression of both love and lust was toxic and manifested itself snidely when he spoke again. "You had plenty of partners I don't know why you're complaining."

"I am not complaining. You brought this up. I wanted to talk about why you are here but you changed the subject."

"Fine. I was concerned that four children would be too much for you."

"Humph, you don't think I have a maternal bone in my body do you? I'm just some useless little princess. That's what you've always thought of me isn't it?"

While there were many rude little uses he could have for her, he was wise enough to keep them to himself and remain silent.

The silence fueled her temper and she whirled around on him. "We'll isn't it?" She shouted with her eyes burning wildly at him. It was maddeningly attractive to him.

Whatever he said next would tip the precarious balance of the moment and he wasn't sure which way he wanted it to go. Telling her some of the uses he had in mind for her could earn him a slap in the face or a painful hex. Then again it could mean that they ward the door and he would have the pleasure of ravishing her on the nursery floor. But she might expect something more emotionally afterwards and he wasn't interested in that. Plus, if he ever did have another opportunity like the boathouse, he would make sure it was someplace more comfortable and inspiring. So he decided to bow out gracefully. Perhaps he could meet up with Roxanne later. He rose from his position on the floor and walked toward the door. "Let me know if you need any help from me."

"Of course," she hissed. "You'll be the first person I call for questions about child rearing."

A smirk curled across his lips as he walked out the door. Good natured sarcasm from an attractive witch was delightful. As he made his way down the stairs and out of the pub he caught another look at Roxanne. Immediately he decided the bloom was off the rose and he would not seek her company again. He would wait and hope for better things. Besides, he had other things to do. He was about the Dark Lord's business.

The word was that Dumbledore was considering hiring Sibyll Trelawney, a ditzy seer that he'd always found annoying. However if Dumbledore was considering hiring her, that meant she was also under his protection and so there was obviously more to the story. She was rumored to be staying at The Hogsheads so he went to check it out. 

Natalia spent the day with Igor attending to his every need. She brought him his breakfast while he was in the tub. She read the entire Daily Prophet to him including a dramatic interpretation of the Harpies match that he was to have attended with Regulus. Though he was not hungry for lunch, she fed him an orange and then suggested they go out for a walk as the weather was a little warmer than usual. They chatted about sights on the street and then sat on a park bench for a while watching birds and reminiscing about benign incidents from their school days, careful to avoid discussing their former relationship. When the sun began to set, they walked back to his flat. Igor was finally getting a bit of his appetite back and was quite happy to smell the thick aroma of Sandy's lasagna coming from the kitchen. The little elf served them in the dining room and after a full tummy and more activity than he'd had in days, he began to yawn.

"Time for bed?" she inquired softly.

"It's still early. I can stay up a little."

"Don't be silly. Let's be gentle to your body. If you feel tired, rest."

Igor tried to respond but it came out as an unintelligible yawn.

"Let me draw you another hot bath. That will relax your muscles and help you sleep." She stood and took their plates to the kitchen.

He began to feel guilty about being waited on hand and foot. "Are you sure you don't want to go first? I feel like I've been putting you through your paces."

"No, that's okay, you go ahead. I showered in the guest bath while you were in the tub today." She went off to the bathroom and he heard the water running. He stretched a bit and then made his way to the master suite. He found her turning down the corner of his bed, an endearing gesture. Nearly content, he found his way to the tub and stepped in to the steaming water that she had laced with bubbles. He giggled at her thoughtful touch and sniffed it to make sure he wouldn't smell too girly when he got out. It smelled like coconuts, similar to suntan oil which he found acceptable. After a few moments, she entered the room wearing only his pajama tops.

"Okay if I borrow your pajamas?"

"Sure." His voice was barely above a whisper for he was mesmerized by the sight of her long sinewy legs remembering how firm yet silken they used to feel under his palms. His breath quickened slightly and he felt the familiar desperate longing in his groin. He should have tried to restrain the notions going through his mind but instead he found himself giving in to them. She leaned over the basin to spit out a mouthful of toothpaste and the shirttail of his pajama top lifted high enough to see the beginnings of the smooth cheeks of her bum. His cock betrayed his desires beneath the warm water. Hidden in the tub, he could still conceal his passion. It was still possible until she turned to face him.

Their eyes found each other's and didn't look away. He remembered how he'd always told her to look directly in his eyes when they made love and as she held his gaze now, he knew she was remembering the same thing. He was clean now. Would she have him? Would she accept him? The answer frightened him for in his fragile newly post dragon state he could not weather her rejection. What would be the use of remaining free of the dragon if she found him still unworthy? Her chocolate eyes remained transfixed on his and though he wanted to know he was afraid to ask.

Not knowing what else to do or how to form the question favorably, he held out his hand, finding simplicity in reaching for what he wanted like a child that has not yet found the proper words. She inhaled softly but remained frozen to the spot as his heart stopped creating a large hollow in his chest. He knew immediately that he'd misjudged the situation but could not extract himself easily. His extended arm hung in the air, a bold question he could not run from without humiliating himself further. No, confidence was essential when he was before her so he turned his palm upward and beckoned slightly with his upturned fingers. "Natalia," he softly called to her, still pleading with his eyes in the face of her hesitation. Her eyes closed as she exhaled, obviously patronizing him as she searched for a way to dash his hopes in the kindest manner possible. The weight of his arm was now intolerable and he dropped it on the side of the tub, crushed.

She took a tentative step toward him as she reached up to unbutton the top button of the pajama top. A heavy sigh of relief mingled with needy anticipation poured out of his chest before he quickly breathed in a fresh supply of oxygen that he would hopefully need for ravishing her thoroughly. His testosterone began to course through his system for the first time in what seemed like ages. She took another step towards him this time undoing two more buttons. While her eyes remained on his, he couldn't help but follow her hands downward as she unbuttoned the last button. The taut skin of her abdomen above the line of her black knickers made his mouth water as he fancied removing them with his teeth and burying his face in her sex until she was at his mercy. The darkness of his nature frequently came out during their encounters but then she had always embraced that side of him in the bedroom and revealed a bit of her own darkness. But they were kids then, unexposed to the cruel ways of the world. His dark side was darker now and he suspected hers was as well. His eyes travelled up to her breastbone and the tantalizing curve of her breasts peeking out from under the loosely hanging fabric. She appeared charmingly unsure of what to do next, not removing the garment but biting her lower lip nervously, which was maddening.

Was she merely allowing him to regain some sense of his masculinity so lost in the last few days as he struggled with detoxification, or was she really nervous? Taking the time to carefully consider which was the truth, was a prudent move with the added benefit of allowing him to savor the vision before him. Her sigh was nervous and he seized the opportunity to guide her, a familiar role. He nodded towards her knickers, gesturing downward with two fingers for her to remove them. She blushed but did not hesitate to do as he asked and he was treated to a glimpse of paradise. His cock twitched again as he curled his fingers to motion her closer to him. When she was close enough she took his hand. He waited for her to shrug out of the garment but she did not, too nervous. She stepped between his knees in the tub as he guided her. Apparently she was just as apprehensive as he for she was still wearing his pajama top.

He ran his hands up her thighs which felt even better than he remembered. His mouth fell open absentmindedly as he stared up at her naked form. He tugged her hand gently and she knelt down in the water only then realizing she was still partially dressed.

"Oh, no, I'm sorry. I..."

"Shhhhh," he soothed her as he pulled her closer until she was kneeling on his thighs. He reached up and slowly eased the pajama top off her shoulders and letting it float in the water towards their feet. She bit her lip again but now he knew it was from apprehension not indecision and his protective nature guided him. He stroked her shoulders and admired her for a moment before murmuring, "You're so beautiful, Natalia." A bashful smile found its sweet beginning at the corner of her mouth on lips so tempting he had to touch. When his hand caressed her cheek she leaned into his touch, closing her eyes when he traced her lips with his thumb. Her back arched slightly, pushing her hips forward against his stout erection. This forced a low growl from him that he tried to restrain to no avail. To sound the slightest bit aggressive with her after what she must think of him would ruin the moment. He remained tentative but was unable to keep from pressing his hips up to meet hers.

A needful moan rose from her chest before her hands wound round his neck and her lips found his. The passion between them so dormant for years now burned again. The lust in her kiss overwhelmed him for he thought for many years that he cared far more than she, but it was now apparent that the depths of her affection matched his own. The time to be tentative was gone. His skilled hands encircled the flesh of her waist as they pulled her body closer to his chest. Again she sighed and now moved her lips down to kiss the smattering of dark hair on his chest. His head lolled back while he relished in her adoration, weaving his fingers through her hair and gently holding her head to his heart. This made the struggle of the last few days more than worth it. To be skin to skin with this incredible creature was worth everything and more. "I need you, Kitten."

"I need you too," she breathed while working her way up to his neck and nuzzling against his beard. As she brought her lips to his and began sucking on his full lower lip, his hands found their way to her hips and began guiding her to his increasingly insistent erection. Her back arched again while she ground against him. With her focus broken she stopped suckling his lips, leaving his mouth bereft. But her bare breasts were now before him, glistening from the bath and he descended upon her right nipple while reaching up to gently tug her hair and maintain the delicious curve in her spine that was allowing him such illicit liberties. Trailing his tongue across her chest he then found her left nipple and gave it his undivided attention and even nibbling gently with his teeth. "Igor, please." She wiggled her hips desperately seeking satisfaction that only he could provide.

Igor growled a primal sound and grabbed the flesh of her backside and moved her over the tip of his manhood. He so wanted her eyes on his at that moment and was about to make the request but when he looked at her she was already gazing into his very soul. He pulled her hips down and pushed his own up finally bringing the, together again. "Oh yes," she cried as her eyes briefly closed while he pulled back and thrust his hips slowly up to meet her again. By the second thrust he was already damned near an explosive orgasm for she was tight around his swollen member. The tawdry company he'd kept of late was, well seasoned in the pleasures of the flesh but with that use came the feeling that some of these women were quite broken in by the time he had his way. Natalia however was as tight as the first time and he knew she had not been with many others. The notion increased his desire nearly to the brink and he had to concentrate on holding back.

Natalia however did not possess such discipline as she usually did and thrust her hips back and forth with rapidly increasing speed. Her eyes remained on his throughout drawing on the connection from their souls as well as their bodies. He was seconds from an epic orgasm, quite unable to turn back but unwilling to go on without her. If the sounds coming from her lips were any indication, she too was close to her edge. A little coaxing would surely push her over. He dug his fingers deeper into her bum pulling her down hard onto his shaft while growling primally. Natalia moaned louder still, her rapture delighting him further. This witch was perfect. "That's right baby, come for me. Come hard for me. I need you to."  
>Some unintelligible words passed across her lips before grabbed his face and pressed her forehead to his, whimpering his name as ecstasy engulfed her. The moment her core contracted around his shaft, his hot seed exploded inside her. He groaned loudly pulling her close to his rigid body and holding her fast as they squeezed every moment of perfect bliss out of each other.<p>

The sensation slowly ebbed away but he was quite unwilling to release her even a little and his grip remained around her like a vice. He felt her relax in his arms while she sighed and kissed his neck lazily. He could never truly let her go.

She moved her hand to push her hair out of her face and then rested it on his shoulder. "Merlin's Beard Igor, that was incredible...as ever." She stroked his cheek softly but was startled when he grabbed her wrist roughly.

"Was that all this was to you? Just sex? Just some game? It was much more for me."

Rather than being fearful of his wrath, she seemed to be understanding. She rested her forehead softly against his and kissed him sweetly. "No, Igor it's always been more than that between us. Surely you know that."

He merely nodded, aghast at his laddish outburst.

She stroked his cheeks softly and kissed him again. "What I needed was the connection with you again. I've missed you terribly. Ah, darling you have no idea."

"Natalia, I've done what you asked; gotten myself clean. I'll never touch another witch as long as I live. I'll swear off, spirits as well. Please just don't leave me. I can't stand to be without you any longer. I've been a fool. I don't care what happened in the past. I only care what lies ahead. Please say you're mine again. I'll do anything you ask."

"I've always been yours," she whispered while wrapping her arms around his shoulders and resting on his chest. "And I always will be." 

_AN: Sigh….I must go dream of Iggy and a steamy bathtub now…..I hope you will forgive me for taking so long with this update. Rest assured though there is no way in hell I would abandon this story now! Thanks to all my reviewers and followers of late. You are keeping me motivated. Big goofy Disney Princess hug to my awesome beta The Princes Phoenix. Without your dirty mind, I am nothing!_

_Thinks are going to get crazy now with the DL. So without giving you a spoiler I do want to prepare some of you. Other than some OC's and filling in the blanks where Igor's past is concerned I've been pretty good about sticking to canon. I like canon. I respect the genius that is JKR. I also feel very strongly that the endings for a few of the characters are a little…..well….unsatisfying. Some deserve better and some deserve worse. So be warned I will be screwing with canon in a BIG way so I can manipulate these endings for a more judicious outcome. One thing in particular I have coming you might have some trouble with. Just please keep an open mind_


	57. Chapter 57 Get Up Stand Up

Chapter Fifty-Seven

Get Up, Stand Up

"I wish you didn't have to go." Natalia fussed with the collar of Igor's robes which was a ridiculous act that he didn't have the heart to criticize. It must be some habitual tendency for surely she didn't care if he looked presentable for the rough company he was about to be joining. It had been a week since she'd arrived at his side, and although he was essentially clean, she was still treating him like a precious glass ornament that might shatter at any time. Though he enjoyed her attentions, he was much stronger now and felt better than he had in years.

He wrapped her hands in his much larger ones to still them. "There is no way around it, Kitten. I'm sworn to serve him and to attempt to leave his fold would be fatal."

"Will he make you go after anyone? Will you have to hurt someone?" Her large eyes resembled a worried child, gazing up at him and begging for him to calm her fears.

Igor pressed his lips lovingly to her forehead to sooth her, but could not lie. "If he asks, I must."

She looked down at her feet and he knew the question she would ask him next, "Do you still believe in all of that? Magical superiority and purity."

"No. I thought I did once but I wasn't in my right mind."

She raised her eyes to him again and he could see her eyes begin to fill with unfallen tears. "The dragon."

"Yes, black dragon, pain, anger...so much foolish anger. Natalia, nothing can excuse all that I've done, but that was my twisted motive. I was angry at the world."

"It was my fault wasn't it?" She bit her bottom lip and looked down again. "I drove you to all of that didn't I?"

"No, no, don't say that." He pulled her close against his chest, stroking her back gently. Pain welled up in his heart as he heard her blaming herself, as if he hadn't hurt her enough. "I made my own decisions. You weren't at fault."

"Igor, when you come back tonight, I think we should talk about what happened," she mumbled into his chest. "We've talked about everything except that this week, and we can't keep avoiding it. There are limits to what I can tell you, but we've never talked about it and..."she trailed off.

"If that's what you want, Kitten, but know that it doesn't matter to me anymore. All that matters is that I have you back. I love you so much." He lifted her chin gently and brushed his lips softly against hers. Though she leaned into his kiss, he pulled away quickly and left, knowing that lingering even a moment may make it impossible to leave.

Severus waited smugly behind his mask at the right hand of the Dark Lord for the others to arrive. When he'd told his Master about the prophecy overheard at the Hog's Head, his status had been immediately elevated. When this was over, and the majority of the Order had been crushed he would save Lily for his own. Surely when she saw Potter and his ilk vanquished she would realize her true destiny was with him.

Tonight's gathering would be a larger than usual one, for the Dark Lord was feeling the need to unify his forces for such an important mission. This meant that they would all be in full masked regalia, though he could easily figure out who most everyone was. They arrived one or two at a time, the earlier arrivals choosing seats closer to the Dark Lord. Lucius arrived right after Severus, unmistakable with his platinum blond hair flayed out across his back. He seated himself on their Master's left but when Bella LeStrange appeared the Dark Lord pointed to him to move, which he reluctantly did. Rudolphus settled in several seats away from her and Severus was glad they were all masked as watching this man's pained expressions lately made his stomach churn. He rationalized to himself that it was no more than the poor sod deserved, for that man knew full well that Bella was an amoral social climber when he married her.

When they were all assembled Voldemort revealed the prophecy, and in a rare display of benevolence gave Severus full credit for presenting it to him. The others were sure to be jealous.

"This subject is to be born at the end of July," the Dark Lord hissed. "That's months away but we must prepare now. I will need to know the identities of all expectant mothers in this area. We may later have to expand but we will start with those closest. Who do we know of at the moment?"

"Alice Longbottom." Rudolphus growled.

" Zeena Patel." Lucius mentioned her triumphantly, such a racist that he would of course want to target families of Pakistani descent first.

"Molly Weasley." Severus had to smirk at that name. Surely nothing of consequence could come from that brood of rubes.

"Crabbe and Goyles wives both have a bun in their ovens." Yaxley, the oaf, brought the names up in his crass way. Severus half expected Voldemort to dismiss the names since their husbands were two of his followers, even if they weren't the smartest. But he merely nodded and the mood in the room changed. No one would be spared.

"Lily Potter, that filthy mud blood." Bella hissed into her master's ear. Severus went white at the mention of his beloved, and was once again grateful for the mask. He hadn't known. Surely this couldn't be true. Married to another, fine, he'd accepted that long ago but his Lily being a mother to that swine's child was unfathomable. The idea of another man's seed in her womb was nauseating. How could she continue to do this to him? He'd thought by now that she would have tired of Potter and come to her senses, but she had not. And now it could be her undoing. His palms began to sweat and he tucked them inside his robes.

"When shall we kill them?" Bella hissed resembling a serpent ready to strike.

Voldemort laughed softly as one would when indulging a child's endless simple questions. "Patience, Bella. We don't even know when these women are due. We must sort that out first."

Severus jumped in immediately, laying out the first of many stalling and diversionary tactics. "My Lord, perhaps we should think more closely about this prophecy. According to it, the child must be born and it speaks only of a male child. Shouldn't we then wait?"

"Yes we should. A more precise plan of action would be best." I want to preserve magical blood where at all possible.

Severus breathed a sigh of relief for the child meant nothing to him and this would give him a chance to spare his beloved. Surely he could persuade the Dark Lord to spare her. After all he had been a good and faithful servant.

"Everyone do your research, complete with projected due dates. We will reconvene in one week. Tell no one." He took Bella's hand and apparated them both away, leaving Rudolphus behind. He was quickly gone as well, then Severus and the others in quick succession until only Regulus and Igor remained.

Regulus removed his mask knowing full well he was not concealing his identity from one who had known him for so many years, and Igor did the same.

Regulus cast an appraising look at him. "We'll you look better than I've seen you look in years. So your eyes aren't naturally bloodshot. What a surprise. All cleaned out are you?"

"Yes." Igor felt shaky at the moment though after that conversation. Being with Natalia, no matter what he might want was putting her life at risk. He had no one to blame but himself. All the poor choices he'd made were now coming back to haunt him. It mattered not that he was clean or forgiving, or well meaning. The damage was done.

"Is Nat still with you?"

"Yes. " Igor had been so out of it the last week he'd forgotten that Regulus was the one who sent for Natalia. "Thank you for sending for her. I wouldn't be alive if it weren't for both of you."

"I thought as much. She is so obviously devoted to you. You should have seen her after you left the pub that night. Positively gutted but trying so terribly hard to be strong. She loves you just as much as when we were in school."

"Mmm," was Igor's only response for he was wary of discussing her with anyone at the moment.

Regulus however was direct as always. "What if she was pregnant? Ever think of that? What am I asking, of course you did. That was your first thought tonight. "

Igor glared at him. "She's not."

"But what if she was? What if she bore you a son? He'd go after them despite what you may want. How do you think Snape felt tonight when that mud blood's name came up? Poor bugger and it wasn't even his. That could easily be you. Worse for you really because it would be your own child. Your own flesh and blood."

"Why do you care? It's not your problem."

Regulus leaned in close and whispered urgently. "We can stop him."

Neither of them spoke for a moment, the gravity of his words sinking in and Igor, though he had not committed felt in danger for even hearing the words. "What are you saying?"

"I know his secrets. I know what he's planning and why he thinks he's so invincible. There is a way to stop him."

"You're talking treason." Igor was apprehensive and feigned loyalty for surely this was just some kind of trick engineered to test his allegiance. Still, he wanted to believe his old friend, so he didn't shun his suggestion, but instead listened intently.

"Not treason for he doesn't rule everyone yet, more of a mutiny. Why should we blindly serve him like a deity and get nothing in return? Look at all we've done and where has it gotten us? Look what he's considering with Crabbe and Goyle. He's going to kill their own children. If he would not spare the ones we love then what are we fighting for? Just hear me out, that's all I ask."

Igor was just desperate enough that he made a likely unwise decision to appease Regulus. "Fine, I'll come to your house tomorrow evening and listen to you. All I will promise you is that I will listen. No more." Igor knew however that he was ready to rebel alongside his mate and would not take much convincing. But there was something he must do first.

As soon as Lucius returned home, he wasted no time, dashing up the stairs and directly to the bedroom he shared with Narcissa. While theirs had been a marriage of convenience he had at come to admire her greatly. She was a wife who would make any man proud; beautiful, the perfect hostess, clever and supportive. Though their union had been arranged and he knew she couldn't possibly love him in the way a wife should love her husband, she was dutiful, both in the running of their household as well as devoting herself to him and the Malfoy family. She even followed through with her conjugal duties, appearing to enjoy it or at least giving a convincing performance. Lucius looked forward to these monthly liberties that usually occurred after she had more than one glass of wine. The groupies that chased after him were sexually inventive and wild. They were loud, free and up for anything but nothing could compare the smell and feel of a well breed witch under his touch.

Yes, he had grown to care for her, and feel protective of her. She was friendly with Crabbe and Goyle's wives and they were now in terrible danger. He would order her to stay away from them effective immediately. Undoubtedly she would protest but he would simply inform her that it was not up for debate. Though she wouldn't like it, she would comply as a proper wife would.

At this late hour he could count her to be asleep and that was better, for he could curl up next to her and drift off into the land of nod himself. She had put up with quite a bit from him, and the sacrifices did not go unnoticed or unappreciated. However, when he opened the door to the bedroom, he found the light sill on and his wife still awake and waiting on him.

"Oh, hello, Lucius. I was hoping you wouldn't be too late tonight." She smiled warmly at him, warmer than usual which led him to believe that she had either over shopped today or wanted permission to do so tomorrow.

"Oh, you're still up. Good, I didn't want to wake you," he lied.

She was sitting up in bed wearing a lovely petal pink nightgown that accentuated her beauty without revealing more than a lady of her caliber would. He kissed her on the forehead and began to loosen his cravat while walking into his closet to disrobe.

"I've been waiting all day for you. We need to discuss something very important."

Lucius sighed his annoyance for their definitions of important differed vastly. He took his time getting into his pajama bottoms, not ready to discuss her gardening dilemmas or social strategies. Perhaps he could silence her with seduction. He was under enormous pressure and could use the full and satisfying relief that a mere wank would not provide. He squared his shoulders and pulled the pit of his belly inward as he exited the closet, peacocking for his own wife.

"My dear, can it wait till morning, darling?" He slid into bed and wrapped his arms around her, "Mmmmm, Lucius has had a hard day." His attempt to gain some sympathy was not well received for she squirmed out if his grasp and looked him directly in the eye.

"I just said this is important, Lucius. I need your full attention...and your support," she mumbled at the end finally peaking his curiosity.

"All right, my dear, what is it and how much will it cost me?" He flopped over onto his back and laced his fingers together behind his head rolling his eyes to the ceiling.

She sighed heavily and paused before beginning slowly. "Well, I am not exactly sure what it is but it will cost you quite a lot."

He rolled his eyes. Of course it would cost him a lot. When did her whims not cost him a lot? "How much is a lot?"

"A rather large share of the family fortune."

"Then whatever it is, it's out of the question." He rolled over onto his side, miffed that he was probably not getting any, but she pulled his shoulder back flat against the bed.

Her force startled him for it did not match with her normally serene demeanor. Icy eyes stared back at him and he knew she was about to ask him for a divorce. Honestly, he was surprised she hadn't done it sooner, for he was a poor husband to her. While she had remained dutiful he was sure that his slights and infidelities were not unknown to her. However he would not allow it. The family would not be disgraced. They were joined for a lifetime no matter what either of them wanted and he prepared himself for a row. "Out with it, woman! I detest it when you speak in code."

"I'm pregnant."

Her hopeful news and expression were met by his motionless gape. He blinked several times but was unable to formulate a response.

The smile faded from her lips and she began to squirm. "Oh, Lucius, say something."

Emotional paralysis kept him from rejoicing with her and he could only handle factual information. "When?"

"June, end of June actually, but they say the first pregnancy can run a little long. It could be July, who knows."

July was not good but the prophecy said the end of July so they would probably be fine. Regardless, he was furious for putting him through this at such a time. "So you're four months pregnant and just now telling me? What kind of treachery is this?"

"Treachery?" Obviously she had not anticipated this accusation.

"Why did you keep this from me?"

"I wanted to be sure and then when I was sure, it just never seemed like the right time. You're away so much and when you are here you seem so preoccupied. I knew you wouldn't be happy. It seems I can't do anything to make you happy these days." She wrung her hands and looked down but mercifully, did not cry. "I thought this was the whole reason we were forced to marry in the first place. It certainly wasn't love."

Narcissa was one of the few people that could make him feel guilty about anything. His wife, his mother and Natalia all he'd that power, and he loathed it. He recalled how he'd treated Natalia all those years ago when she'd come to him in the same condition. The cold response he gave her had haunted them both ever since and now here he was doing it again to the woman he was bound to forever. "Narcissa, that's not true. You please me more than you know. I...I am happy. It's just a shock that's all." He pulled her into his arms and against his chest.

This was an opportunity to do things right for once in his life. He hadn't ruined this child's life yet, but the specter of the Dark Lord loomed in the background. He would have to play his hand carefully. He leaned her gently onto her side, creating enough space so that he could touch her belly with his hand, his first bond with the child. Tomorrow morning he would send her away to the safety of her parent's summer home in Cypress. She and the child would be out of sight from Death Eaters with twitching wand hands. He would still have to come clean with his master but the estimated June delivery would exclude her from his calculated interest.

Severus stood in front of the Potter residence in Godric's Hollow gazing longingly up at what he believed to be Lily and James' bedroom window. Though he could easily break through what were probably ridiculously simple wards and enter the house, he knew Lily would find that behavior appalling, so he attempted a more subtle approach.

"Expecto Patronum," he whispered and watched the ghostly doe take shape in front of him. The doe floated up to the window and hovered before it, streaming its gentle glow into the room. It was a risky move but desperate times called for desperate measures. He hated that she brought such recklessness out in him, it caused him to make mistakes in is carefully ordered life. But there was no time to waste, for she must hear this warning immediately even if it cost him his own life. If James awakened before she did, he would just have to deal with it. While such a prospect was distasteful, for once they would both be fighting on the same side. War made strange bedfellows.

Favor graced him for once in his life when his ginger haired love appeared in the window. She must have remembered his Patronus for she opened the window and looked over the dark yard. "Severus?" She called to him in a whisper.

He stepped out of the shadows and waved to her to come to him. Incredibly, she did not hesitate, and his heart soared when she opened the door. She was wearing a long sleeved white cotton nightgown that clung to her delicate frame and nearly rendered him speechless.

"Well?" She prompted, crossing her arms in front of her chest and scowling at him.

So this is how it would be, yet again. As always he would be doing anything to please her and she would be unappreciative and sullen. He would have to take solace in knowing that he was doing what he must, and that one day she would bestow her gratitude on him. "I need to speak to you in an urgent manner. May I come in?"

"No." She answered coldly and he began to wonder why she'd come down at all.

"Then will you come out?"

"No. Say your peace and the leave my doorstep." She tapped her foot impatiently and looked past him to the street.

Severus looked over his shoulders, worried that he had been followed. "I can't have this conversation with you in front of your house. We can't be seen. Can we at least go round back."

"You're quite notorious these days," she hissed. "How do I know you aren't trying to trap me?"

"If you were that concerned you would have awakened that arse you live with."

"You mean my husband," she corrected him.

"No," he drawled nastily. "I mean that arse you live with." And then it dawned on him. "He isn't here is he?"

"He's upstairs asleep and if I scream, he will come down here and level you."

Was she lying? He was not sure but it mattered little. He leaned in an inch from her face. "My dear, if I were trying to trap you, you would already be caught. Now either let me in or meet me round back, but to not hear me out would be folly."

"Fine, meet me in the back." She shut the door quickly and Severus went round to the other side to wait for her. Behind the house he found a modest garden that would have been lovely in the spring, but for now was looking rather desolate under a dusting of snow. He waited impatiently and was beginning to think she would not emerge from the house until he heard the door click open. She'd thrown on a long grey wool coat, a hat and some furry looking boots, a rather frumpy ensemble by some people's standards but he found her lovely as ever. Lily was the picture of a proper English witch. How could she not be his?

She strolled over to him rubbing her arms for warmth in the cold night air. "State your business, Severus."

"You're in danger, Lily," he began. "I've come to warn you."

Igor returned to his flat earlier than expected with an enormous weight on his weary shoulders. Rather than materializing right into his abode, he'd appeared in the hall so as not to wake Natalia if she was asleep. Truly he was too sad to face her, for he knew what he must do. It mattered not how much he loved her, or she him. It didn't matter that he was clean or that he wanted to stay that way, for his life was forever tainted, eternally damned as a result of his foolhardy decision made in the hasty firestorm of his youth. The lights were out when he entered which was a good sign. He leaned against the door, pulled off his boots and set them by the door so he could walk about and not rouse her. As he entered, he shrugged out of his black robe and let it fall to the floor in a hill of black silk. He pulled his shirt over his head and tossed it on a nearby chair, still accustomed to having someone else take care of such things despite being on his own for many years.

As he entered the large room with the best view of London sprawled out for miles, and the light of the pale full moon pouring in, he stopped cold when he saw the grand piano, glistening in the light, completely refurbished. Even the most accomplished wizard would have had a time putting each piece back in its proper place and he knew Natalia must have taken great pains with it while he was out this evening. He ran his fingers over the smoothly lacquered surface as his heart sank further. Here she was working so hard to do something that would please him and when he was about to tell her goodbye again, perhaps forever this time.

He sat down at the bench to play something but when his fingertips touched the keys he felt utterly uninspired and didn't play a note. His shoulders dropped in unison with a regretful sigh.

But the perfect melody of her voice filled his ears. "Do you take requests?" Before he knew she was there, she was close enough to run her hands across his tense bare shoulders and down his arms. Her head rested upon his shoulder and he leaned into her hair, inhaling lavender just one more time.

"How did it go?"

Worst case scenario didn't even come close to describing how it went, but when he turned his head and looked into her painfully hopeful brown eyes, he couldn't bring himself to tell her anything. He touched her cheek gazing wonderfully as if seeing something new again. How could this monster take her from him? What gave him the right to do this to those that had so faithfully served him? Oh they'd all gone willingly to him but now Igor was no longer willing. He would no longer give his permission for Voldemort to take that which was most dear to him. His decision was made. He would fight alongside Regulus and bring this sociopath down. It was the only way he could ever have Natalia again. Certainly the chances of prevailing were slim, but it was his only choice. It was preferable to die trying than to just walk away from her again.

"What is it? What's happened?" Her tender gaze filled him with an urgent need that he couldn't repress before telling her what he knew he must. He turned and took her cheeks in his hands.

"Have I ever told you how beautiful you are, Kitten?" A luminous blush graced her cheeks which he found endearing. "You leave me devastated every time you look at me with those eyes. I get lost in them." Gently he pulled her face to his and kissed her parting lips slipping his tongue inside her mouth to begin to possess her. She shifted to sit next to him on the bench leaning against him and softly submitting to his will with a feminine sigh. He accepted her submission and wrapped his arms around her waist, pulling her firmly against him, his kiss deepening in intensity and urgency. Desperate did not begin to describe what he felt which included a sad melancholy, for this may be the last time he would ever make love to her. This sadness was made even worse with the knowledge that if not for his foolish pride he could have been with her for years and more to come if he was not contracted by Voldemort. "I need you, Natalia," he groaned painfully.

She responded by flipping her leg over his, straddling him and pushing her hips against his awakening erection. "I need you too." Her hands wove lovingly into his untamed mane and held his lips against hers. She nipped softly at his lower lip coaxing a low rumble from his chest. Tracing his gracefully poised Slavic cheekbones with her thumbs she guided his lips exactly where she wanted them and he allowed it, her willing subject, for how long would such ador last? Slowly her hands drifted down his neck and across his bare chest and down to the waistband of his trousers where she traced her fingers just inside, taunting him. A choked moan wordlessly begged her for more and she obliged him by deftly undoing his belt. In her haste the leather flipped back, cracking across the flesh of his belly causing him to wince and sharply draw breath.

"Oh, sorry," her brow pinched together with concern.

But there was no need for concern for Igor liked it a little rough and remembered that she used to take pleasure in his manhandling of her.

A wry smile began on one corner of his mouth. "Bad Kitten, I may have to discipline you, break those feral tendencies so you can be a proper house kitty." Perhaps he was pushing his luck, but that was his nature. Tonight he wanted to do all the things they used to love before everything changed.

Natalia buried her face in his hair and purred naughtily against his neck as she wriggled her sex against his trousers. He laughed softly and bared his neck to her while sinking his fingers into her bum and pressing her against his now stout erection. It was the first time he'd laughed in months which made him feel immediately lighter. She was so good for him, his only healthy addiction and one he had to feed immediately. Without the Black Dragon to get him high, he craved the replacement that her love, desire and his orgasms would bring.

With a roar sounding like a bear he grabbed her backside and stood, lifting them both and knocking over the piano bench behind them which crashed loudly.

"Shhh, Sandy will hear you," Natalia scolded.

"She knows better than to come nosing about. Now no more reprimands from you, Miss Smith or I will fuck you soundly right here in the hall." He punctuated the word fuck by squeezing her bum a little more and pressing her against him.

"You and your empty threats." She rested her head on his shoulder.

He carried her into his room, kicked the door shut behind him with his foot and tossed her playfully on the bed. With a backward wave of his hand he warded the door. Before he could tumble into bed beside her she slid off the bed, dropped down to her knees and began to finish removing his trousers, sliding them down then kissing the tip of his member that was happy to be free of the constraints.

"Natalia, wait," he breathed. She did not know what she was in for. Over the years he'd developed an insane amount of staying power, so if she was planning on bringing him to a climax through fellatio, she was probably in for a painful case of lockjaw.

Dark eyes looked up at him. "Don't make me break the leather strap out again." Her lips were full and pouting and after a cheeky comment like that he selfishly couldn't wait for them to be around his cock. He was so ready for her that the muscles in his abdomen were trembling and concerns about lockjaw were replaced with the lecherous wish that she didn't forget his balls. She didn't.

Her lips grazed lightly around his groin while she gently cupped his family jewels with her silken hands. An angsty groan came from deep within him for she hadn't even taken him in her mouth yet and he already felt ready to explode. He tried to distract himself, thinking of the landscape of St. Petersburg, quidditch strategy, industrialization and men's fashions but when her lips closed in on his member and she took him in all the way down, he whimpered her name and dug his fingers into her hair. His expressions seemed to spur her on for she sucked harder and moved her head faster. Now her hand was moving backward behind his balls pressing gently on the spot between them and his bum. Damn! Where was his usual 'Dragon dick' when he needed it. He would not be able to hold out much longer and the witch was relentless, showing him no mercy, going harder and faster as he became breathless. Her hand continued pressing gently into him, moving back further to his bum before surprising him by inserting her finger inside him.

"Ah fuck," he shouted in surprise as he came unraveled and erupted down the back of her throat. She kept her finger in place but moved it in and out slightly while he shook and his body tensed through the end of his orgasm. When he looked down he watched her swallow and then pull away and rest her head against his thigh. Though weak and recently spent he found the strength to scoop her up and lay her back on the bed before curling up beside her.

He lay there on his back for several moments, unable to do much other than blink and stare at the ceiling, his mind devoid of conscious thought. As he replayed the naughty interlude in his mind, he began to analyze why she would have touched his bum in that manner. For all his randy ways and experimentation, he was firmly heterosexual and like most men of his kind, mildly homophobic. Though what she'd done was pleasurable, he began to become concerned that he felt that way, and even more concerned that Natalia would know that lurid unspoken desire. He couldn't keep from asking her, "Why did you do that?"

"Do what?" She sighed.

"You know." He was mildly annoyed that he would have to provide more detail.

"Oh, I don't know," she shrugged. "Seemed like the thing to do at the time."

That answer wasn't anywhere near what he wanted to hear, so he pressed for more. "Why did it seem like the thing to do? Why did you think that I would like that?"

"Intuition." She smiled devilishly at him which rather than charmed him, made him a little paranoid. Did she think he was a little on the witchy side?

"Why?" He asked flatly. Was she mocking him?

"We'll I was right wasn't I?"

He frowned.

She laughed.

"What's so funny?"

"I always knew you had latent homosexual tendencies."

She knew exactly how to get to him. "Excuse me?" He rolled on top of her, pinning her arms above her and her legs under her weight. "Are you questioning my heterosexual drive?" Despite the subject matter and the perceived slight to his manhood, he adored these little games they would play.

Natalia pursed her lips together and considered her reply. "We'll considering some of your outlandish fashion choices, the fact that you have on at least one occasion worn eyeliner, it could be naturally assumed by some people…"

"I'm quite sure no one has ever assumed that about me."

"I'm sure they wouldn't say that to your face but as for me, I think you are essentially straight," she teased.

"Essentially?" Igor snickered. "No, my dear, there is no 'essentially' involved. Let's get that straight now."

"But you went to that all boys' school," she giggled. "I mean really, you all had fur coats and pimp canes, plus who know what went on in the _bowels_ of that ship at night."

He ground his hips against hers, holding her down still. "Those are your fantasies Kitten not mine."

Natalia laughed loudly, "Oh, you know all my naughty fantasies do you?"

"Indeed. I will say this only once more, I am only into women. Actually no, I must correct that. I am only into one woman." His lips descended onto hers, dominating her. He could taste himself on her lips but decided he much preferred the taste of her sex to his own, so he began to move south, first to her breasts. She moaned softly, arching her back be closer still. He sucked her nipple until it was firm and then moved to the other to give it the same attention. When it was also standing at attention he began to move down to her tummy, leaving a trail of wet kisses, as he neared her pubic region.

"I want you," she groaned and tried to pull him back up, still shy about that even after their history.

He appeased her; wanting only what she wanted, and moved upwards until he was eye to eye with her again. "You have me." He sighed wistfully as he stroked her hair. For a brief moment their evening had been enchanting, but the miserable reality was creeping into his mind again and he didn't feel right seducing her without telling her everything. All between them must be honest and on the table or they couldn't move forward. "I am yours, and I will always be yours. It's so important that you believe that even though after my record I'm sure that's a stretch."

"Igor, I know we've been apart for a very long time, but I've not been with anyone else in any way. Even when you cast me off I've always felt I belonged to you. That night when you came into the pub…"

"Don't remind me. I was horrible to you."

"It wasn't you. Not the Igor I knew anyway. Let's not talk about that anymore. I don't want to waste a moment with you on things that don't matter now that I have you back." She pulled his face to hers for a kiss but he resisted, his guilty conscience pulling him away from her. "What's the matter."

He flopped over on his back wondering how he would ever begin such a discussion.

"What happened tonight? You didn't tell me when you came in."

"You're in a great deal of danger with me."

"How so? Though I don't support You Know Who I thought that since you were on his side you were protected."

"I thought so at one time, but I was a fool. I've been a fool in a great many things, Natalia. You're a fool for loving me."

"Oh, Igor, why do you always talk in conceptual language when I want pertinent details?"

"I prefer concepts to the reality. Reality is frequently too difficult for me to face. That's why I run from it."

"There you go again. Just tell me."

He sighed loudly, working his jaw nervously before he began. "I can't give you details. To do so would only endanger you more, but I tell you what you need to know. The Dark Lord has become aware of a prophecy that predicts his potential undoing."

"Most of those so called prophecies turn out to be rubbish but I'll hope for the best with this one."

"It's not that simple. He's trying to change the course."

"Not surprising."

"The prophecy predicts the birth of a child that will grow to eventually murder him unless he can kill it."

"Oh, no, the children."

"No dear, your little charges are safe for now. The child is to be born at the end of July, but tonight he began compiling a list of expectant mothers and we are to reconvene once he knows their due dates so we can prepare to vanquish them."

"Oh,"

"Some of the wives of his followers are with child and you wouldn't believe how callously he reacted. Their loyalty means nothing to them. Lily Potter's name was mentioned as well."

"Oh sweet Merlin, does Severus know."

"We mustn't discuss who knows what. I've said too much already. But, Natalia, listen to me, being with me doesn't protect you. It only puts you in more danger on both sides."

She threw herself on top of him and hugged him tightly. "I don't care. I know where you're going with this but I'm not letting you go again. Igor, please."

"It's the only way, my love. I'll not be giving you a choice in this matter, but fear not, I have a plan."

"A plan?"

"Yes, I'm not going to serve him any longer. I'm going to find a way to undermine him and bring about his downfall. After tonight there are sure to be others who feel the same."

"No Igor, he'll find out. All these disappearances…he knows who opposes him. If he finds out he'll kill you. We can hide. We can run."

"No one leaves his service, my dear. Some have tried, all have failed. If I continue to follow him, I will have no life with you. If I openly oppose him, it's suicide. No, this is the only way. Tomorrow morning, I'm sending you back to Hogsmeade."

"No," she protested.

"This is not a discussion. If I don't know you're safe I won't have my wits about me and I'll be unable to do anything. No, if you love me and you want a life with me…though Merlin knows why you would, we must part ways, just for now. I want you to take Sandy with you too."

"No, you have to have someone to look after you."

"I'll be fine now that I'm clean, I can take care of myself. I'd rather she help you with the children and I want her to be safe too. She's been a good servant to me. There may also come a time that I would be arrested and if so, they would seize all my assets. Who knows where she would end up then, possibly auctioned off to someone horrible. No, I want you both together."

"Igor, don't talk like that."

"I don't want to talk at all." He rolled on top of her and kissed her deeply until she turned her head.

"Igor, stop, I want to discuss this."

"Ah, Kitten, you're so strong," he whispered into her hair. "Always wanting to control a situation, but this is one that you can't." She made to speak again but his lips covered hers with much more force this time. She began a struggle but he held her wrists firmly and pinned her with his weight, continuing to kiss her thoroughly, pressing her head into the pillow until she acquiesced and her legs curled round the backs of his. "Do you know how hard I will fight for you?" His lips murmured against hers but she was unable to respond. "My love, nothing will keep us apart now. We may be separated by distance temporarily but our hearts are one again. I love you, Natalia Smith. Never forget that." His lips crushed hers and he began his slow methodical seduction of her that would be their last for quite some time.


	58. Chapter 58 Fire On The Mountain

**Chapter Fifty-eight**

**Fire On The Mountain**

Igor knew the moment he had to tear himself away from his lovely Natalia, that his newfound sobriety would be under duress. He had no want for substances when she was near him, but now, lonely in his large and luxurious bed, he found himself unable to sleep and considering just a small glass of whiskey to numb his nerves and provide the escape of slumber. But that was something he would have to do without. Surprisingly he did not consider it a sacrifice, merely an annoyance.

Besides an empty bed, he had much to think about this evening. His meeting with Regulus and their discussion of horcruxes had blown his mind. While he'd heard whisperings of such things during his time at Durmstrang he thought them to be purely rumor, for even in his current associations, the prospect of eternal life through spells was rarely ventured. He was now certain that if Voldemort caught wind of such whispering he would put a quick end to it. When Regulus told him about the necklace and how he'd come upon it through his own house elf, he found the story even more outlandish. To involve another wizard's house elf in such a scheme seemed uncharacteristically careless to him, and he suspected that Regulus would be carefully watched from now on. They'd discussed other possible horcruxes and ways to destroy them for hours, but while their theories were many, their facts were few.

Without a better plan, Igor decided to pay a visit to his old school the following day and try to see Oblonsky. Normally he would have been happy to return to his alma mater, but sadly he suspected he would no longer be welcome by his Headmaster or anyone else these days. He was grotesquely infamous. When he rose the next day, he decided against the traditional red robes of a Durmstrang alumnus and opted for dark trousers with a drab dark sweater and nondescript black robes. The last thing he wanted was to be noticed by either side. He apparated just outside the castle gates and was immediately chilled to the bone. He'd been away so long that he'd forgotten how miserably cold the place could be. He frantically fumbled for his wand and cast a warming spell over himself.

"Is the English weather so fine that you're now unaccustomed to a little cold?"

The voice startled Igor and he whirled around with his wand drawn to find Oblonsky smirking at him. "Put your wand down, Igor, I'm not an auror, though I'll thank you to give me one good reason not to summon them."

Igor straightened his spine and raised his chin, a reflex from all the years of Oblonsky correcting his posture. "I come in peace," he spoke gently for the man he was addressing appeared frail and slightly disheveled; a far cry from the stout and demanding headmaster of days gone by.

"Peace," he growled. "That's a laugh. No one has had a moments peace since you and that band of pretentious criminals came together." Oblonsky took two steps forward now drawing his wand in an attempt to intimidate, which failed due to the elderly shake of his hand. "State your business quickly before I rip the hide off you."

"I must speak to you in private, sir. You may hold my wand if you like." Igor twirled his wand nimbly in his fingers until the handle was facing Oblonsky. The older man snapped it up quickly. "Follow me." He led Igor around the side of the massive castle and through the door of a nearby shack that looked barely large enough to house a child. The inside however was far more spacious with a big fireplace. Oblonsky pulled him into the floo, tossed powder on the ground and announced, "My office."

They were quickly inside Oblonsky's office and Igor felt a bit of melancholy sweep over him at being in such a familiar place. He recalled many evenings of being invited into this sanctuary with other select young men and listening to the old man impart his wisdom on their young minds. Shame gnawed at his belly, for Oblonsky must certainly see him as a disappointment.

"Cognac?" Oblonsky offered.

"No sir. I no longer indulge in spirits." Even if he was not in recovery, it was ten o'clock in the morning. Things must be bad at ole Durmstrang if the normally reserved Oblonsky was drinking this early.

Oblonsky snorted and poured himself a drink, apparently having no qualms about drinking alone. "Since when?"

Igor counted the days, no small feat since they seemed to run together. Three days roughing it out on his own and then seven long and delicious days with Natalia. "Ten days, sir."

"Indeed?" Oblonsky blinked at him and then shrugged spilling his liquor as he gestured with his glass. "Well that's good I suppose. Will it disturb you if I imbibe?"

Igor didn't really know if it would bother him or not. He had not been around anyone drinking or using in ten days. Under the sweet attentions of Natalia he was carefully tended and also untested. He squared his shoulders, determined not to let this man see weakness in him after years of trying to become a man worthy of the Durmstrang heritage. "No, sir."

"Thank you. And you can drop the sir; I'm not your Headmaster any longer."

"Yes, sir,'" Igor mumbled clumsily eliciting a nasty look from Oblonsky before he took his first sip.

"Sorry. Habit." Igor was bothered by his own seemingly adolescent mumblings. He was a grown man but being back at Durmstrang with Oblonsky was pulling him back into the role of student.

"Go on then, state your business." The old man grumbled at him before slouching down into a well-worn oxblood leather chair.

"I would like your expertise on a type of obscure dark magic."

Oblonsky sneered at him over the rim of his glass. "Humph," he grunted. "Why come to me? Why not ask your lord and master?"

Igor knew he deserved that and worse and so took the remark in stride. When he was younger he would have to do some significant ego stroking when the Headmaster was in such a mood. Presumably there would be no difference today. "I trust only you in this matter."

"Well, well, trouble in magical utopia?" He clicked his tongue to shame him but was unable to provoke a reaction from the now cool Karkaroff. "All right then, what magic do you seek?"

"I don't seek it." Igor shook his head slowly. "I just need to know about them, horcruxes."

Oblonsky sighed his disappointment and took a long drink of his liquor. "Of all my students," he rasped while shaking his head. "I would have never imagined this of you, my brilliant, dashing protégé."

Igor held his hands up in defense. "I'm not interested in making one. I'm interested in destroying them."

Oblonsky appeared more interested now and leaned forward in his chair. "Oh, I see. You have an enemy."

"Many," Igor snorted.

Oblonsky smirked at him, a little chuckle quickly turned into a coughing fit and it was a moment before he could speak again. "I may be aligned with your enemies."

"Not this one. Please Headmaster, I cannot tell you more. It would put you in danger."

"I think I understand." He eyed his former charge warily.

"I just need to know, is there a way to destroy these horcruxes?"

"I know of only two, but they are extremely difficult."

"What are they?" Igor asked quickly, wanting to get to heart of the matter and move on before he was found to be there.

"The first is by use of Fiendfyre. Do you remember my lecture on this?"

Igor did remember it as one of the most fascinating classes, but they had not been permitted to attempt the spell. "Yes sir, but you did not teach us the spell."

"No of course not. It's too dangerous and if your emotions are not in check, it will turn on you. I couldn't have a bunch of erratic hotheaded young men practicing that? The castle would have been burned to the ground. You would have been the worst, always flying off the handle over a match or losing your mind over some witch."

"I only ever lost my mind over one witch," Igor snapped.

"And all for not, wasn't it? You dumped her."

"I'm here to discuss magic, not my sex life. You said there were two ways?"

"Yes, the other is with Basilisk Venom."

"Basilisk venom? Where can I find that?"

"A basilisk obviously." Oblonsky raised his eyebrows mockingly while swirling his drink in its glass.

Igor rolled his eyes and waited, hoping something more useful would come out of this man's mouth.

"The easiest way is to kill one and then remove the fangs."

"That's the easiest? You aren't giving me good options."

"We'll they are the only options you have."

"Thank you." Igor rose to go.

"How can you be sure you've destroyed the only one?"

Igor froze and turned slowly, for this was something they he discussed with Regulus, but they weren't sure it was possible to create more than one. "Are you saying there could be more than one?"

"It's possible. Unlikely but possible."

"How would one determine the number?"

"There is no way to be certain, however if you can find out how many people the creator has murdered, it would give you a maximum amount."

This was the worst news of the day, for there was no telling how many people Voldemort had murdered over the years.

"The more the soul is split, the more unstable the original person becomes both in appearance and demeanor. That won't give you much to go on I'm afraid."

"Can you tell me anything else?"

"Nothing more to tell," he said with a shrug before tilting his glass and swallowing the remainder of his drink.

Igor took a long hard look at the man he considered as second father to this day. He looked ancient and there was a terrible sadness about him. "Why are you drinking so much so early?"

Oblonsky abruptly slammed his empty glass down on his desk. "Oh, on your high broom now since you are all nice and sober are you?"

"Not at all. I mean no disrespect. I just don't remember you drinking during the day before. Is something bothering you?"

"You think you know so much now don't you? You know nothing. Certainly nothing of love, I mean the non-carnal sort."

Igor's temper was beginning to get the better of him and he was starting to remember how much he despised this man when he was unreasonable. "I'm not claiming to know anything. I'm asking a question because I'm concerned about you."

Oblonsky waved his hand dismissively. "You needn't be concerned about me. But say a prayer for my Rosmerta. She's not well." His voice cracked as he spoke of the woman he loved.

"Oh?" Now it made sense. Igor recalled how drawn to the former patron of The Three Broomsticks he had been. He now felt a strange kinship with him over their shared fondness of witches who ran pubs. "Has she been ill long?

"About a month. Ever since our last anniversary."

"What is the matter with her? "

"I don't know. It started with a foul mood. Then her language became coarse then her behavior just got more and more erratic. Now she is clinically insane and so violent that she must be restrained at all times." Oblonsky cleared his throat loudly. "She's a completely different person."

Something began to twitch within Igor's belly. It was his intuition, back after a long hiatus and he was more than happy to follow it. "May I see her?"

"Why not?" Oblonsky sighed with an exaggerated shrug of his shoulders. "No reason not to really, but prepare yourself, it isn't pretty."

Igor followed him out of the office and to a room two doors down with at least five different oversized pad locks that Oblonsky opened with his wand. "Rosie? Look who's come to see you." He crouched a bit and entered the room tentatively.

The woman before them was nearly unrecognizable. The normally buxom and beautiful Rosmerta was thin with blotchy red marks on her skin. Her boney arms were tied to the bed and when she saw them she began to struggle against her binds, snarling like an animal. Her eyes were wide and wild with none of the merry warmth that Igor remembered.

"Rosie," Oblonsky addressed her sweetly and smoothed a long frizzy bit of hair out of her face. Her hair was streaked with grey and matted in spots. Igor watched this hardened man as he tenderly addressed the beastly woman before them. His eyes were already reddening at the rims and Igor looked away, loath to see such a strong man crumble. "Look who's come to see you Rosie,. It's my star pupil Igor. Do you remember him? He was Natalia's beaux."

Oblonsky motioned Igor to come closer to the bed, while Rosmerta cocked her head to the side. It was as if she understood and was trying to place him. Igor moved in closer and saw her mouth turn up at the corners, she did recognize him. Without warning, she threw her head back and cackled loudly, possible remembering some antidote. While her head was back he heard her gargle in her throat and before he knew it slimy thick mucus was spat in his eye. Igor jumped back and resigned himself to pulling out his handkerchief to wipe the humiliation off his face.

"I think she recognizes you," Oblonsky quipped.

Igor scowled back at him. While it was tempting to snap back, he felt a soft place in his heart for his old headmaster and chose to refrain. He turned his eyes back on Rosmerta, still struggling against her binds and growling like an animal. She was dressed in a baggy cotton nightgown and looked rather downtrodden except for some kind of bejeweled tiara perched on top of her tangled mop.

"What's that on her head?" Igor nodded towards the object of interest.

"It was an anniversary present. She hasn't taken it off since. Has a fit if we try to take it from her."

Igor's curiosity was plodding him along. "Where did it come from?"

Oblonsky became defensive. "It should have been mine all along."

Igor put both hands up as he acquiesced, for this situation must be handled with great care and Oblonsky was quite emotionally unstable. "I didn't say you stole it."

"I traced my ancestry back to the Middle Ages," he stated indignantly. "Rowena Ravenclaw's mother was a born an Oblonsky. It was she who gave her the diadem and when her daughter died it should have come back to my family."

Igor could barely believe his ears, or his luck, for more pieces of the puzzle were suddenly falling into place without warning. "Are you telling me that's the lost diadem of Rowena Ravenclaw?"

"Yes. The last time I was at Hogwarts I was walking down this corridor wishing I could find some quiet place away from the students. They were quite troublesome that day, when this room opened up out of a stone wall. You wouldn't believe all the treasures in there. Whoever was hoarding things won't even miss this; there was so much rubbish in there."

Igor's mind worked rapidly. It was an incredible coincidence but the similarities were impossible to ignore. If Voldemort chose to make Slytherin's locket a horcrux, it would stand to reason that he would also use objects from other houses. One look at Rosmerta was enough to tell him that she was under the influence of some twisted dark magic, so he ventured his theory to his old headmaster. "You know, we already have one horcrux; Slytherins locket."

The old man's eyes widened in disbelief making it immediately apparent that he thought the same thing. "Are you saying you think this is a horcrux?"

Igor shrugged, for all he had was a hunch, no proof. "Could be, the locket can't be worn without drastically affecting the mood of the wearer. If the diadem is a horcrux that could be what is making Rosemerta ill."

"Then we must destroy it."

Igor nodded emphatically, pleased that Oblonsky even in his current state was a decisive man of action. "I can do it."

"Outside and I will do it so you don't burn the place down."

"I can do this," Igor huffed indignantly, hating the role of student to which it seemed this man would forever relegate him.

"Bah! You always were a hothead. Let me see to this." He turned to his wife in the bed. "Rosmerta, dear your tiara is tarnished. I'll just take this to the house elves to be cleaned up right proper." Rosmerta struggled, thrashing beneath her restraints and growling her displeasure at him, but he was able to snatch it from her. As soon as he had it, he began shoving Igor out of the room. "Let's go. She'll be in a foul temper now."

Indeed she was, for she screeched like an angry fox behind them. Igor silently wondered if destroying this prized item would help her at all. This was beyond a bad mood, she had regressed into an animal state and it occurred to him that she hadn't been able to formulate a single word.

Oblonsky led him down a short stairwell and out a back door that was hidden and previously unknown to Igor.

"How long has that door been there? I don't remember it, and I thought I knew every inch of this castle."

Oblonsky looked at him with a merry twinkle in his eye, the first time it was visible today. "You don't know all my secrets." They walked about twenty yards away from the castle before Oblonsky set the diadem down on the ground and removed his wand.

"Headmaster, perhaps you should let me do this." Igor interjected, though Oblonsky still had his wand.

"Oh, I see," Oblonsky huffed. "You think I'm old and don't have the will for it."

"Not at all. I just feel it's my responsibility. Really, it should be me."

"We'll it's not going to be you and here's why. Number one, you're Undisciplined."

"Undisciplined?!" Igor shouted indignantly.

"Yes. Poor study habits, dropped that nice girl when she wounded your pride, illegal potions, fighting, dark magic, loose women," Oblonsky enumerated Igor's shortcomings holding up a finger for each offense.

"All right, all right you've made your point, but you're wrong."

"Two, you've never done or seen this spell."

"If you just tell me what to do I could do it."

"Three, and this tells me you aren't thinking things through; he may feel it when this is destroyed, and if he does, he'll be looking for the person who did it. If he conducts an analysis of your wand, he will know."

"All the more reason it should be me. I don't want to endanger you unnecessarily."

"He will never know. He still thinks it's at Hogwarts. If he suspects anyone, it will be Dumbledore. Now step aside and let an old man join the fight." Oblonsky held out his wand and prepared to cast the spell. "Oh," he reached into his pocket and handed Igor back his wand. "If this gets out of control... cast some kind of water spell or something."

"Or something?" Igor chuckled. Though he liked living in the moment, this still seemed extremely reckless.

"Just use your best judgment."

"I though you didn't trust my judgment."

"I trust it if you're trying to protect your own hide."

Igor snickered at the shrewd analysis, and watched as Oblonsky prepared himself. He took a deep breath and began to swirl his right arm over his head in a circular motion, slowly at first, then building speed. His eyes closed as he went into a trance like state and sparks began to fly from his wand. The sparks became larger then joined together to form a flame, snaking over his head. The orange flames became bigger, soon dwarfing the man conjuring them. A thick cylinder of fire grew and lengthened until it formed a serpent snaking across the sky in search of something and hissing. Igor kept his wand at the ready though how he could stop such a creation he did not know.

Oblonsky's arms raised above his head were now shaking from the force of holding such a spell. The situation looked about to take a turn for the catastrophic when Oblonsky leaned back and with a furious shout threw his shoulders forward, driving the Feindfyre down toward the diadem. The flaming serpent opened it's mouth and engulfed the object within it, then began to thrash about as if it was in pain. Oblonsky lost control and fell backwards just as the serpent shot straight up into the sky like a rocket. He flame seemed to fizzle out into nothing. Oblonsky, now on the ground squinted upward looking for it. Igor offered his hand to help him up.

"Do you think that destroyed it?"

"I don't know." The words were no sooner out of Oblonsky's mouth before a loud explosion accompanied by a burst of sparks similar to fireworks erupted above them. Grey ash rained lightly down on them leaving them both baffled. Then a pile of tiny jewels hit the ground in front of them followed by the gold frame of the diadem, in two charred pieces.

"You did it!" Igor gushed excitedly.

"Humph, of course I did." Oblonsky dusted himself off. "Here, you take the pieces and hide them away. He may know it's been destroyed and if that is the case, he will be looking for the one who did it. Hide them and get yourself home quickly."

"Yes, Headmaster."

"Igor," Oblonsky began but then hesitated seemingly uncomfortable with what he was about to say. "I'm glad to see you straightening your life out, son. I was always fond of you like you were my own."

Igor looked down at his feet humbled by such rare and in his opinion undeserved sentiment.

"May I tell your father that you are well?"

"I would rather you didn't, please." Igor shook his head slowly. "We haven't spoken in years."

"But he's still your father."

" He's disowned me. Let the family just move on."

"As you wish, but I hope one day you will reconcile with him."

Igor let that remark pass, for the point was futile to consider much less argue. "Thank you for your help today. It was more than I expected and I am indebted to you."

"You owe me nothing for doing the right thing. You'll come see me again and let me know how you're getting on."

"Yes, I will."

"Right then, I'd better go check on Rosie." Oblonsky nodded and turned to go, but before he had taken two steps Igor turned his wand on the old man and whispered,"Obliviate." Oblonsky began to collapse slowly but Igor caught him and eased him gently to the ground.

"I'm sorry, Headmaster," he whispered to temporarily deaf ears. "It's for your safety."

Igor's pulse was racing. One horcrux was destroyed and he knew how to destroy the second. They were making progress. He would go immediately to see Regulus tonight and they would destroy the locket. But were there more? He had a pretty good hunch that there were several more. The first two were associated with houses of Hogwarts and so the possibility of two more associated with the remaining two was a safe assumption. But the number was the unknown variable that would stop them at every turn. They would have to do much more reconnaissance work in order to get the maximum number. It was ludicrously dangerous but he was up for the fight. After years of numbing himself to all manner of feeling, he felt alive again.

Lucius sat by the window bathed in the light of the full moon staring at the diary in his hand. For years he'd fallen all over himself in feeble attempts to ingratiate himself to the Dark Lord. He'd betrayed friends, family and above all his own conscience over the years. And now here it was; trust of the most untrustworthy wizard on the earth. The diary, he was told possessed the power to unlock the fabled Chamber of Secrets in the bowels of Hogwarts. Lucius was entrusted to hold this item for safe keeping but he sensed there was more to this little book than that, for it felt evil in his hands, heavy and disconcerting. When he held it for too long his mood darkened, he snapped at his wife and felt murderous at the slightest offense. He'd read about such things on occasion when he could weasel his way into the restricted section of the library. It was starting to add up; Voldemort's increasingly disturbing appearance, the concern and significance he placed on seemingly ordinary objects such as the diary, his frequent statements of immortality and invincibility; they were all pointing to one conclusion. This diary must be a horcrux and it was not the only one.

He gazed at his lovely wife, sleeping peacefully in their bed, the graceful swell of her belly incubating their child only adding to her beauty. The moment she told him she was pregnant he felt deeply connected to her, like he had not before. A part of him was growing inside of her and that bond would never be broken. He found it odd that he had not experienced such a bond when Natalia came to him pregnant all those years ago. Perhaps it was fear, or perhaps it was the unfathomable amount of shame that he had put her into such a predicament, but whatever the reason, the bond had been absent. Now however he felt protective of his new little family and would stay up late into the night plotting against the Dark Lord alone. For there was no one to help, no one to confide in and no one to advise him. He was the only thing that stood between his family and darkness.

Severus stood on top of the hill in the dark thicket of woods that concealed a heap of ruins of what was once the Guant House. He smirked a bit at the sight for even in its decaying state it was obvious that it had never been much more than a shack. To think the last descendants of the House of Slytherin used to dwell here. It was a terrific farce and the irony was not lost on him.

The wind blew a chill down his neck and he used his free hand to pull his cloak closer to his neck. His other hand was occupied with his wand, trained steadily on the object floating in front of him; a garish ring presumably to be worn by a man. He knew it was cursed but not the precise spell so he would not touch it until he was certain. Could this be the key to destroying the wizard who dared to try to harm Lily? It was a stretch but he had no other prospects. To oppose the Dark Lord was folly but what did he care now? To live in a world without the one you love was not to live at all.

_AN: Well here is where we diverge a bit. Hang on! Thanks to all for following the story. A little pluggy plug…my wonderful beta has a new story out, also dealing with horcruxes. It's fantastic and if you like Snape and or Regulus, you should definitely check it out! It's called Treason's Treasure by The Prince's Phoenix._


	59. Chapter 59 Search and Destroy

Chapter Fifty-Nine

Search and Destroy

Igor no sooner returned to his flat when the cursed brand on his forearm burned with a vengeance. _He must know_. Igor steeled himself, knowing he was about to face an exhaustive inquisition like no other. Death surely loomed before him, but the only possible way of escape was to face it head on. So he quickly donned his mask and with a flourish of his wand, and apparated to the side of his demented master in the ballroom of a large manor house. He was relieved immediately to find that it was a large assembly. Surely not all of the followers were included but it was the usual circle that he was included in, and enough that it improved his odds of survival.

"There is a traitor in our midst," came the rasp of the waxy skinned wizard before him. Igor noticed Lucius shifting his weight uncomfortably but Regulus thankfully, remained cool. He watched everyone with rapt interest. What would Lucius be hiding? He would find that out later. "Give me your wands." Severus came forward immediately heeding the request and bowing as he presented his wand without hesitation. The rest of the group hesitated, which made him wonder what they were hiding.

"I said I require your wands…this instant!" Voldemort bellowed and the rest of them stepped forward to hand over their wands before his wrath rained down on them all. The Dark Lord examined them all carefully and Igor knew precisely what he sought. Oblonsky had saved him when he insisted on casting the spell himself.

When all wands had been examined, he growled at Lucius. "Where is the object I have entrusted to you?" _What object could he mean? Better yet, why would he entrust it to Malfoy of all people?_

Lucius gulped nervously and patted his breast pocket. "R-right here, my lord."

"Give it to me!" He held out his thin pasty fingers and Lucius placed a small leather bound book into his hand. He snatched it and examined its pages and cover closely. He seemed pleased with what he saw and handed it back to him. Then he smoothed Lucius long hair and rubbed his shoulder slowly, the sexual manner of which made Igor nauseous. Lucius tolerated it but was noticeably uncomfortable. Igor had long suspected Voldemort to be bi-sexual and thought little of it. He'd always considered himself worldly and evolved, but at his core Igor was just a red blooded male from the Russian countryside and seeing it firsthand freaked him out just a bit. Thank goodness he seemed to prefer his wizards blonde.

"I will find this traitor, and his accomplices. When I do, you will see what happens to those who dare to betray me." And then he was gone.

The apprehension lingered in the room as the rest of the pack mercifully slithered away. When it was just Regulus, Igor and Severus. Regs removed his mask. "So Iggy, still sober?" Regulus asked as if he hadn't just seen him the day before.

"Ten days," Igor responded proudly as he removed his mask and shook his unruly mane free from the hood of his robes. The shroud that he once felt protected beneath, now felt like a bind.

"What an accomplishment," Severus commenting in a sing song manner that mocked Igor's effort. "Did you earn a little plastic chip for that?"

Before Igor even realized he was angry, his wand was shoved under Snape's chin pushing it upward. "Don't belittle it, you filthy bat!"

"Hey, whoa, easy, Karkaroff!" Regulus tried to defuse the situation, but stopped short of stepping between them. "It's Severus. You know he has no couth."

"Yes, put your wand down, you barbarian! You would think after all this time in a civilized country you would know how to conduct yourself."

Igor narrowed his eyes, knowing he would never hurt Severus but still wanting to put him in his place. He shoved his wand harder into the fleshy underside of Snape's chin and remarked, "Mind your tongue, Snape," before lowering his wand.

"All right both you two, settle down. It's close to dinner, what say we go get something to eat?"

Igor nodded, for he'd been too busy to eat all day. He hadn't realized it until just now but he was famished. "Fine, where shall we go?"

"My place, Severus will you join us?"

"I have better things to do than kill time with you sods," Severus drawled before stalking away with robes drifting gracefully behind him.

Igor was exceedingly grateful for his exit, for in his shaky state of mind Severus could easily press the right buttons to make him explode. It would also give him much needed time to talk strategy with Regulus.

They arrived at 12 Grimmauld Place and gathered around the large kitchen table. It never failed to amaze Igor how cramped and dark the place was. The Karkaroff family home was large, airy and spacious, with plenty of room for all the children and cousins to run around. It must have been suffocating to grow up in such a place as the Black family home. Judging by the screeching greeting they received from the portrait of the late Mrs. Black, she would not have understood if something was out of place. No wonder Sirius ran away from home.

"Kreacher," Regulus summoned the house elf who shuffled into the room slower than molasses in January.

"Good evening, Master Regulus. I see you have a dinner companion this evening."

"Yes, old boy. Fetch some wine from the kitchen."

"None for me thanks." Igor mumbled still unsure how to handle such situations tactfully.

"Oh, right, sorry," Regulus seemed embarrassed by his gaffe. "What would you like, mate?"

"Tea is fine, or whatever you have. Please don't go to any trouble."

"Mind if I have one?"

"No." It annoyed him to be asked that twice in one day. Was every future social situation to be so awkward for those around him? Would it embarrass Natalia to be out with him, weakness laid bare for all to see? Natalia, they'd barely been apart for 48 hours and he felt her absence sorely. He wondered what she was doing tonight; probably working at the pub. She would be around men drinking themselves into an uninhibited state of lust and fancying her no doubt. Would she forget him? No, surely not. She loved him. He felt it. He would give anything to see her again. Maybe he could sneak away later tonight. No, that would endanger her. Surely they were all being watched. Ah, but he ached for her comforting touch and sweet voice.

"I could use a drink." Regulus poured himself a large glass of red wine while Igor shook his wandering mind back on track. "So, interesting meeting tonight. Who do you think the traitor is?"

Igor smiled mischievously at his friend. "Me."

Regulus cocked his head to the side. "Something you would like to share?"

Igor could not contain the grin that began on onside of his mouth. "I located and destroyed a horcrux today." 

Lucius sat alone in his study with a decanter of ridiculously expensive single malt scotch in front of him. He was already well onto his second glass but still the shake in his hand would not subside. He eyed the diary in front of him, both curious and fearful of it, for it seemed to breathe and live as some kind of animal. He ran his fingers over the name on the front; Tom Marvolo Riddle, smirking to himself at the first name being not a proper name but a shortened version of Thomas; a mark of low connections that he wouldn't dare to point out to anyone, much less the owner.

A knock at the door of his study made his heart nearly jump out of his chest. The house elves generally stayed out of his way since Narcissa went to spend the rest of her period of confinement with her parents in Cypress. He shoved the dairy in the drawer and called out, "I'll take dinner in here tonight, Dobby."

The door flew open violently startling him again and only adding to his anxiety. "I'm not your servant'" Severus snarled as he entered the room.

Lucius sighed in annoyance but was relieved it was only Severus. Unfortunately though he wanted to drink one more and fall into drunken slumber, but now he had to deal with this miserable sod. He attempted to be hospitable. "Severus, how delightful. Will you join me in a drink?"

"I knew I'd find you indulging. The dark lord suspected you for a moment tonight. That's enough to set anyone on edge." Severus waved his arm over his head and the door slammed shut behind him.

Obviously, Snape was onto what Lucius was thinking but had not yet verbalized to another soul. He pretended not to notice and hoped this was not a test of his loyalty. "I have nothing to fear from him. He knows I am loyal."

"What was that book he's entrusted you with?"

Severus was cutting right to the chase, but Lucius was not sure he wanted to play tonight. Severus was closer to Voldemort than anyone and confiding in him could be extremely dangerous. "If he has not chosen to enlighten you, do not expect me to do so."

"As I thought. You have no idea, do you?" Severus strolled about the room looking down his nose at Lucius. "It's obviously quite precious to him for he looked murderous when he approached you. He must have thought it was damaged or missing. But then it wasn't, so something else must be amiss. What do you make of it?"

Lucius took a gulp of liquor and shook his head. "I don't question him, Severus, nor should you."

"I'm not questioning him. I'm questioning you. "

Lucius swallowed and glared over his glass at Severus. "Well don't."

Severus sat down in the handsome leather chair across the desk from Lucius. He had to find a more tactful way to begin. Lucius had no idea what he was holding. He had to proceed quite carefully for it would not be prudent to reveal all too soon, particularly about the ring. He would hold that bit of information for now. Lucius was a slippery scoundrel and would be on whatever side was winning at the moment. He was not to be trusted and if Severus had any other options he would use them, but he did not. He knew the moment that Voldemort demanded to see the book that it was a Horcrux. If he wanted to move forward and protect Lily, he would have to involve Lucius. So, he took a different route. "Did I hear correctly that your lovely wife has gone to Cypress, for the remainder of her confinement?"

"You did."

"You cannot hide her from the Dark Lord, Lucius. If he decides that your child is the one the prophecy refers to, he will kill it and she could very well be collateral damage."

Lucius snapped at the mention of her name, "Don't you think I know that?" He was so nervous, drunk and angry he spit when he spoke. "I'm not hiding anything. He knows she is there and he knows she carries my child." A little bead of perspiration broke on Lucius' forehead and he wiped it away quickly.

"And you're just going to let that happen, are you?" Severus stared at him with arched eyebrows. "Let him kill your child? He _would_ kill Narcissa too, you know it's true."

"I have no options. I am bound to him and sworn to serve him. I could die trying to fight him but I would lose. He is said to be immortal."

"Perhaps not," Severus' cryptic response hung in the air.

Lucius snapped his head in Snape's direction. "What are you saying?"

"Have you ever heard of something called a Horcrux?"

Convincing Lucius to join him was not as difficult as Severus thought it would be. Explaining his theories on how they could defeat such a powerful being had been the hard part, for Severus was not certain they could do it. However, with both of them being fearful for their witches' lives and otherwise out of options, Lucius eventually relented. Predictably he'd been a nervous Nelly ever since, most likely fearful that he had made a terrible mistake and that Severus would double cross him. The very idea amused Severus, for if anyone would weasel out of a deal to save their own hide, it was Malfoy. Severus had far more reason to worry than Lucius but that didn't stop him from insisting they meet at Spinners end for a strategy session.

Lucius thought it was far more private than Malfoy Manor with all the house elves scurrying about and random social climbers popping in for this and that. No one ever wanted to visit Severus and he was generally an unsociable sort that did not invite anyone. They carefully examined the diary but didn't handle it much for Lucius explained how to him it felt like it was alive. It could very well be that they were already found out. They discussed that theory but them decided that if Voldemort had an inkling of their betrayal, they would already be dead.

Severus knew of only one way to destroy a Horcrux and so they discussed at length how to locate a basilisk and how to kill it. They decided to search in the rain forests of South America and perhaps also India where such creatures had been known to live. It could be a lengthy search however and time could very well be of the essence. They had nearly wrapped their discussion when there was a knock at the door. Both wizards looked at each other warily.

"Are you expecting someone?" Lucius whispered.

Severus put a finger to his lips and shook his head no. "Put that away'", he whispered as he nodded to the diary on the table.

Lucius picked up the diary and slipped it into the breast pocket of his jacket. As Severus approached the door with his wand drawn, Lucius stealthily assumed a position just inside the study door, hiding his presence but ready to fight. The knock on the door came again, this time louder and more urgent.

"Oi, Snape, open up! It's Regulus!" Severus turned to Lucius who nodded towards the door indicating he should open it. Severus opened the door quickly to find not only Regulus, but also Karkaroff. "We need to talk." Regulus' tone indicated he would not be put off by Snape's usual snarky comments and even the normally mischievous Karkaroff looked sober as a judge tonight. Severus was at the very least, interested if still guarded and let them in.

"Do come in, gentleman," Severus snarled. "I hope you don't mind but I already have company this evening."

Regulus and Igor followed Severus into his sitting room but Igor stopped cold when he saw Lucius. Though their paths crossed constantly over the years and by all outward appearances people would have considered them to be friends, each bitterly resented the other for their involvement with a certain witch.

"Lucius," Igor drawled his disingenuous greeting to his old rival.

"Igor," Lucius nodded coolly, not wearing his sentiment as Igor was prone to do.

Severus found their sullen greetings tiresome and childish. He detested such displays, finding them counter-productive when they all obviously had bigger things on their minds. He made a feeble attempt at being a proper host, "Would anyone care for a brandy?"

"I'll pass," Igor said softly, again feeling awkward refusing intoxicants.

Lucius eyes widened, gaping at Igor, "You're joking,'" he remarked flatly.

"No," Igor drawled, challenging him.

Regulus inserted himself into the conversation before it could escalate. "Igor is not longer indulging in drinking or dragon or anything else that might cloud his judgment."

"Indeed?" Lucius began his taunt. "And what prompted this epiphany?"

"Nothing that concerns you." Igor's wand hand was twitching and he began cracking each knuckle with his thumb, limbering his hands in preparation of a fight.

Regulus was not about to tolerate a fight with those that they needed to enlist. "Don't you two think it's time you put your schoolboy spats to rest? Let's dispense with these unpleasantries and discuss why my friend and I are here tonight. Lucius tell us what you know about that book the Dark Lord entrusted to you."

Lucius looked briefly at Severus who shook his head almost imperceptibly. "I know he has entrusted it to me and if he wished either to know about it he would have told you."

"Oh shut it," hissed Regulus. "You have no idea what it is, do you? Let me enlighten you. It's called a Horcrux."

Lucius met Snape's eyes with urgency, and the two exchanged knowing looks. So they weren't the only ones who had this figured out. Regulus mistook their silence for ignorance and began to elaborate.

"It's a type of very dark magic that,"

"We know...what it is," drawled Severus in his typically snide fashion. "The issue is how to destroy it. I suppose we might as well bring you into the fold. It seems we are on the same side. We were discussing possible places in which to locate a basilisk. You can destroy a Horcrux with the venom. It won't be easy but now that there are four of us, we can split up to find the location and then regroup to kill it."

"We don't need to do all of that," Igor sighed, slouching back in his chair and stretching his long legs out in front of him.

Lucius looked expectantly at Severus who was studying Igor closely. "What are you getting at, Karkaroff? Are you saying there is another way?"

Igor stretched out his arms before lacing his fingers behind his head. "Precisely, Feindfire will also destroy a Horcrux and you won't attract attention by traipsing around hunting for a basilisk."

"Preposterous," huffed Lucius. "You expect us to believe you? What do you know about such things?"

"I've already destroyed one."  
>Both Snape and Lucius gaped at him for a moment, then Snape pulled a chair close to him and said, "Tell me more."<p>

For the next hour Igor told his tale but took the credit or the blame, depending on one's perspective, for actually destroying it. He could hardly repay his old Headmaster by dragging his name into things. He told them he'd stunned an unsuspecting Durmstrang student and borrowed their wand to explain why the trace magic was not left in his wand when checked.

Regulus seemed to tire of listening to what he already knew and moves the conversation to something more productive. "So, we have one destroyed, and one in hand. "

"Two in hand," Severus corrected and walked over to one of his overstuffed bookshelves.

"Two? Have you been holding out on me, Severus?"

Severus smirked to himself, for he had indeed been holding out on his slippery friend. However he now felt more confident that the dependable Regulus was involved. Igor too was probably not a risk seeing as he was now sober and his future life with Natalia was at stake. He removed a book from the shelf and opened it. The book had a false center allowing for storage inside. It had been his mother's and she had used it to hide money from his father. The ring was inside and he levitated it out and into the room between them.

"It belonged to his family I believe. It's protected by a very dark curse of some kind. One touch could very well kill you." The other three gazed at it, trying to process it all. "I think we may fairly assume that all of these items will have either historical or personal significance."

"So perhaps he has utilize some object of significance from Hufflepuff and Gryffindor. The cup and the sword are the most logical choices.

"I may be able to locate the cup." Lucius was anxious to contribute for he felt rather useless thus far. "I seem to remember Bella boasting about acquiring it."

"Proceed with caution there," Severus added. "You know who she is to the Dark Lord."

"Not so much who as what." Igor snorted.

"I'll help Lucius with that one." Regulus chimed in. "She is our family, sad to say."

"Igor and I will seek the sword." Snape would actually rather have Igor as his partner in this than the other two. He knew he was good under pressure. "We should store them all here together while we look for the others. To destroy one at a time would give him more clues to our identities. And you never know when we may have to destroy them all at once."

"Storing them at one of our homes would be foolish. I know of a better space, our family has a seaside cottage outside of Bath. No one goes there." Regulus added.

"Very well, but the diary must remain with Lucius," Snape added. "We never know when he may have to account for it."

_AN: My lovely beta said she would love to be in a room with all four of these guys. Me too!_


	60. Chapter 60 Gone, Gone, Gone

CHAPTER SIXTY

GONE, GONE, GONE

Natalia tossed and turned in her bed knowing she simply must get to sleep soon in order to have enough vitality to face another busy day. However, sleep continued to elude her as it did most nights, and watching the hours tick by on the clock edging closer to morning only increased her anxiety. Months had gone by and there was still no word from Igor. Although he'd told her he would not risk contact with her, the uncertainty of it all was terribly stressful. Even the normally informative gossip tabloids made no mention of him. Was he safe? Hurt? Dead? She did not know anything and it was maddening.

It was one thirty in the morning and she was a bundle of nerves. Her legs were fidgety and uncomfortable no matter how many times she rearranged them under too heavy and restrictive covers. With an exasperated huff she flung off the bedcovers and shuffled down the hall to peek into the nursery. They were all snug and fast asleep with Sandy, curled up in her bed that was also in the nursery.

Having Igor's former house elf around was a godsend, for she ran a rather tight ship with the little ones and Natalia was able to sack the aging and slightly senile nanny and save some money. The other staff had sulked for weeks about it, thinking Natalie cold for getting rid of the old woman. However they eventually warmed to Sandy who was as efficient as she was charming. Natalia was pleased to notice that her bottles of sherry now seemed to last longer, confirming her suspicions about the old nanny.

She eased the nursery door shut without a sound, and tiptoed downstairs in search of some sleep inducing carbohydrates and a large glass of milk. When she found her way to the kitchen, she did not turn on the lights, preferring instead to conjure up a little flame suspended over the center worktable that offered a warm glow about the room without disturbing the peace of the dead of night. She'd never minded insomnia. Rather, she found it quite freeing. During the day she felt as if her time was never her own. Between the running of several businesses, the children, the staff and continuing to support the werewolf freedom movement, there wasn't a moment to spare. But now, in the still of the night, she could think, reminisce, and dream of a time when she could be with Igor again. Sadly, at the moment she didn't know if those were to remain foolish dreams. She craved some news of him and became lost in her musings as she stood absent-mindedly in front to the open refrigerator door. She saw nothing appealing but continued to look, seeking comfort in starch and sugar.

The sharp pop of an apparition just outside the kitchen door that opened to the back ally snapped her body to attention. Whoever was out at this hour could only be up to no good. Natalia instinctively drew her wand and backed into the corner just beyond the hinge of the door. She watched the handle twist slowly and heard a man's voice huff in exasperation on the other side. She was annoyed herself that the kitchen staff had failed to reactivate her wards, and now this intruder would waltz right in, unchallenged. But little did they know that they would have her to deal with. The door opened slowly with an eerie creak and then a hooded figure wearing what were unmistakably death eater robes entered the room. They stepped inside slowly, but before they could turn around, Natalia mustered enough courage to stick her wand hard into the small of their back. "Turn around slowly and you just might survive," she hissed, trying with all her might to sound threatening. She jabbed her wand in a little harder causing the figure to flinch.

"Ouch," came a familiar voice. "You know if you would take the proper precautions you wouldn't have to guard your entrances." The figure turned and she saw the dark eyes she loved so much. It was Igor, looking well but sober as death.

"Oh," she cried, throwing her arms around him and nearly collapsing with relief. But her greeting was immediately interrupted by a cry coming from something between them. It was cradled in his arms, preventing her from melting into him as she wished.

"Careful," he whispered softly, dropping his arms to reveal something bundled up in what looked to be an old horse blanket. His rough looking hands adorned with garish silver rings depicting skulls and other symbols of dark magic worked to unwrap the innocent parcel, revealing the angelic face of an infant who was grimacing and sputtering as if he was revving up for a loud cry.

"Oh my heavens," Natalia cried, instinctively reaching for the child, for she had grown quite fond of children these past years, particularly babies. Igor handed the child over, before slumping back against a now shut door. The baby unleashed a lusty cry and began to squirm in Natalia's arms. He began nuzzling against her breast and grabbing at the cloth of her nightgown. "Oh, Merlin's Beard, I'm afraid you're out of luck there darling, but surely I can find a substitute." She reached for her wand and summoned a bottle from the cupboard, grateful that she remembered the bottle preparation spell from when the orphans were a bit younger.

"Ah," Igor sighed wistfully as he watched her lick her index finger and put it in the baby's mouth causing him to suckle it and calm himself almost immediately. "I knew you would know what to do with him."

Natalia looked sharply at him, narrowing her eyes in an expression that baffled him. Even in the unusual circumstances he thought she would have been happy to see him.

"Is he yours?" The reason for her scowl was now apparent, and it annoyed him. He was always doubted, even by Natalia.

"What? No!" He huffed indignantly, bristling at such a question even though deep down, he knew he deserved no better.

Natalia considered his answer as she reached for the full bottle now hovering before her. "Well, who is he?" She suspected it was one of his Death Eater cronies who now needed Igor's help to get him out of a pickle. He would have to help in order to maintain his cover, but still. The very thought disgusted her. She was certainly not prepared for his response.

"His name is Neville Longbottom."

The name made her shake with terror. "Oh my gosh, Alice and Frank's son, what's happened to them?" She held the child just a little bit closer knowing something very bad must have happened for Igor to have the child. The poor dear latched onto his bottle, blissfully unaware of his unfortunate circumstance. The sight nearly broke her heart.

Igor shook his head violently, now seeming to break down a bit himself, for his voice as ragged and uneven. " I don't know. They were coming for him. They thought he was the one the prophecy referred to."

"Oh God, Igor, did they see you?" She looked up briefly, then back to the little one in her arms.

Again he shook his head. " No, I overheard some of them talking. I remembered Longbottom from Hogwarts. There was intelligence on the location of their house. I just took the boy. I didn't stick around. They would have killed him. There was no other way."

"What about Frank and Alice?"

Igor looked down at his feet, for it was too terrible to share with her. She was not accustomed to such horrors. However in this case even the battle hardened would flinch at such a tale. When he spoke, his voice cracked. "I don't know. I broke in the house and found the child. There was no time to explain. They were right behind me. I just got out of there with Neville. It was the best I could do for him in that moment."

"You did the right thing. Tomorrow I'll get word to Alice and..."

"Natalia," his pained expression met hers, begging her to understand so he didn't have to say it.

"You think they killed them?" Her voice quivered barely above a whisper.

"I'm sure of it." Igor nodded slowly while watching her carefully for her reaction.

Her breathing sped up as she held Neville a little closer, her heart breaking for this tiny creature. Igor approached them slowly and wrapped his arms around both of them, planting a soft kiss on her forehead.

Silent tears slid down her cheeks, dripping onto Neville's forehead, causing him to wince a little before he began to drift off to sleep. "They'll be looking for him," Natalia gulped, trying to be brave.

"Undoubtedly."

"Is he the one?"

"I have no idea, nor do they. They are on an indiscriminate rampage and enjoying the sport. We have to hide him. Give me a day or two to figure something out and then I will come back and move him. Until then dress him in pink, give him a girls name and don't let anyone near him but you, and I mean no one. You change every nappie."

"People will be suspicious."

"Tell them it's colic and you have to keep him close or he'll cry."

"She'll cry," she corrected. "Sandy's been helping with the children. We can trust her right?"

Igor considered this for a moment. "I'd rather not bring anyone else into this but yes, we can trust her." He stepped closer to Natalia and Neville and placed his rough hand gently on her shoulder. "Natalia, I'm sorry to bring you into the middle of this but I can't trust anyone else. I know you'll take good care of him."

"Like he was my own." Her lower lip quivered a bit for there was nothing she wanted more than Igor and his children, but that was not to be today. She would have to find solace in the care of little Neville.

He seemed to understand her perfectly, reaching up to comfort her by stroking her hair. "One day, Kitten, I promise you."

She tried to keep a stuff upper lip, but her voice cracked. "I know."

The bare emotion in her voice made his knees weak, for he never loved her so much as when she expressed her love for him. He hadn't planned on staying, for fear of being discovered, but tearing himself away seemed impossible in that moment, so he stalled. "Let me help you get him settled upstairs before I go."

Natalia smiled weakly, too desperate to have a few more precious moments with him to think better of it. When she reached the top of the stairs with him she turned and whispered, "Go to my room at the end of the hall. I shall see to Sandy. The less she knows the better."

"Dah," he affirmed and crept quietly down the hall to her room. He entered the dark room and waved his hand to illuminate the candle on her nightstand. The room was characteristically minimalist, but the furnishings were expensive. The duvet was made of a fine fabric and the pillows were fluffy and plentiful. His naturally jealous tendencies got the better of him and he feared that this exquisite decor was for someone else. In his newly sober state, and as a byproduct of his associations, he'd been careful to keep very close tabs on Lucius lately. But since Narcissa had become with child and even more so since Draco had been born, her husband had been nearly above reproach. Igor sat down on the bed and shrugged out of his robes, then reached down with a weary sigh and pulled off his boots, careful to set them down gingerly so as not to make a sound. He flopped backward onto her rumpled bed and indulged in the scent of lavender. He breathed deeply in and out through his nose and began to relax. So much so that he was nearly asleep when she entered the room.

He blinked his heavy lids and raised his head slightly. "All right?"

"He's fine," she murmured with a quivering lower lip. She stepped toward him and eased herself on top of him, burying her face in his tangled, unkempt mane  
>of dark waves. "I've missed you so much," she sobbed, clinging to him greedily.<p>

"Ah, Kitten, I've missed you too." He turned to see her face. "You know if there was any other way, I would be by your side every second of the day, but it's not safe for either of us. I shouldn't be here now."

"Don't you dare leave me, Igor." Tears rolled down her cheeks. "I've been so worried. I haven't had a bit of news from anyone, not even Severus. It's maddening. All the disappearances, and even The Ministry has gone mad, arresting people for the slightest infractions. The aurors come by every so often to the pub, just looking for trouble. If you ask me they are all drunk with fear and power. It's like martial law."

"Shhhh," he silenced her lips with his own as he wiped her tears with his thumbs. Her kiss, initially tender, quickly turned ravenous, the sexual connection between them still electric after months apart. Igor groaned his appreciation and rolled on top of her, grinding his eager erection into her sex. He was on fire with need after so long away from her. It was the longest time he'd gone without having sex in, well, ever. And now without the solace of Black Dragon to sooth his desires, the thirst for her was maddening.

Natalia arched her back, tangling her fingers in his hair as she wrapped her legs around his. Ah, to be loved, to be caressed by this woman was all he wanted in life. To think how carelessly and recklessly he had tossed her aside. The foolishness if his snap decision that day terrified him, so he held her tighter and kissed her harder to try and push the memory out of his mind. She responded in kind, moaning into his mouth and arching her back, making a sensual curve that he caressed, but it wasn't enough. It seemed he couldn't get close enough to this woman. Knowing how her skin would feel against his made him impatient, and rather than a slow methodical seduction, he reached into his pocket and eased out his wand. He whispered the charm that caused her nightshirt to slide up and over her head and her knickers to travel down her legs. She had to unwind her legs a bit to let them slip all the way off. The buttons of his shirt undid themselves and he released her only long enough to shrug out of it. His belt undid itself and when he lifted his hips, his trousers quickly left his body and finally there was nothing between their skins but heat.

Then he began to devour her. He moved his mouth away from her lips leaving her gasping for him. He moved his lips across her cheek, tasting her flesh with his tongue just under her jawline. She turned her face to allow him more of her and he responded by teasing her with his warm breath along her neck and shoulder, hovering his lips just above her body to tantalize her. She reached up to pull him closer but he resisted.

"Please don't, Igor. It's been so long." She breathed. His resolve crumbled in the face of her words and he aligned her hips with hers. Her hands caressed his back and travelled down to his bum, pulling him firmly against her sex.

"Did you miss me, Kitten?" He growled. "Tell me you did."

"Yes," she breathed. "I've missed you terribly. I lay awake in this bed worried to death about you every night." She began to tear up again, but he kissed them away.

"You have me tonight, my love." He eased into her, slowly, deeply, while watching her eyes close and her lips part. The effect they had on one another continued to entrance him after all these years. No one knew him or cared for him like his lavender girl. Despite her request for immediate gratification he took his time with her, preferring to savor every precious second with her as if it may be their last.

Just before dawn she drifted off in his arms, exhausted and finally content enough to sleep. But Igor could not sleep. Though he should be blissfully content, at least temporarily, something was gnawing at him. He had a bad feeling in the pit of his belly that something was off. Rarely did his instincts let him down, but at present he could see no logical issue. Perhaps it was just the feeling that being here was too good to be true. It was, really. In a few short hours he would leave her again and who knew if or when he would ever see his love again.

The alliance he and Regulus had formed with Severus and Lucius, while distasteful was thus far productive. They had been successful in locating several horcruxes, unfortunately they had no idea how many more might be in existence. Other than the diadem, they had not destroyed any. This was strategic, for to destroy them would be to alert the Dark Lord and leave them open to exposure. So for now, Regulus was safeguarding them until the time came. Igor had no idea when that time might be or how they would even know when the time came. The lack of control was maddening,

He turned his head to kiss the top of her head and nuzzle her silken hair. She looked more grown up now, possessing a certain air of competency and sleek professionalism about her. His erratic lifestyle and associations gave him an entirely different look. He worried that in a few years he would distinctly resemble Vlad the Impaler, and then she would not desire him. The idea sent a shudder through him and he pressed his lips to her head again, just because he could. She awoke with a start.

"Oh no, " she gasped, raising her self up but still in his arms. "We forgot the spell!"

Igor merely smiled dreamily at her, pushing a chunk of hair from her eyes. "What spell is that, Kitten?"

"Agh, THE spell! The contraceptive spell. Oh, my word, I can't believe I did that. It's just that I haven't taken the potion in ages, with you being away and all. "

Her fretting had a surprising affect on him. He gazed vacantly at her for a moment, not blinking. He had truly forgotten the spell and this would be a highly inconvenient time for children, but now that it was possible, he warmed quickly to the notion. He stroked her cheek gently. "Opposed to playing Russian roulette with your favorite Russian?"

Her shoulders relaxed as her eyes filled with melancholy as she gazed into his. But then she frowned and her mood hardened once again. "Igor, we have to face reality. Neither of us are in a position to deal with that, and it would only be one more life at risk."

Igor squeezed his eyes shut tightly and flopped his head back into the pillow. She had seemed winsome when she held Neville, but now her emotions were back under wraps and cold street sense took their place. If he disliked anything about her, it was her inability to relax her mind and dream a bit. Sometimes he wondered if this made them incompatible, for his mind wandered to fantasies incessantly. Insecurity crept in to his head, planting the reminder that she had once carried a child, and it wasn't his. What could he offer her? Nothing at the moment, perhaps nothing, ever. What was she doing with him? Disaster followed, every time they were together. A man like Lucius, even if she was only his mistress could offer her far more security than he could at the moment as a disreputable ex junkie, with no ethical prospects, a family who disowned him, and low associations. He'd never even held an actual job. Suddenly, he hated himself and wanted to hide from her.

"I have to go." He sat up and began to search for his clothes.

Natalia sat up with only the sheet covering her nudity. "Don't be like that."

He didn't respond or acknowledge her, but kept about the business of redressing. Her tardy protests were slightly irritating.

"Igor, don't leave like this. You know I'm talking sense. "

The women was maddening and he was now so rattled he couldn't speak for a moment. He busied himself pulling on his trousers with as much dignity as he could muster considering he did not take the time to locate his skivvies, then he shoved his arms into his shirt and began working on the buttons. Feeling her gaze on him he glanced up to see her sad expression and felt ashamed of his mini tantrum. He snatched his boots up and flopped down in a chair to put them on. "I know," he grumbled as his boot hit the floor with a depressing thump after he slipped it on. "I can always count on you to bring me back to reality." His foot slid into the other boot and also hit the floor with a thump. He leaned forward, elbows on his knees and lifted his head to look her in the eye. "But sometimes reality is difficult for me to face. I suppose that accounts for the extremes in my life, drugs, women, dark magic." He sighed and shook his head as if to shake something out of it. "I shouldn't be here right now. The aurors have been after me lately, but I needed the escape that your bed provides. More of my bad judgment," he spat angrily.

She looked quizzically at him, the guilt heaping on him under her gaze until his shoulders bent under the weight of shame. This was his issue, not hers, and he softened.

"I didn't mean it like that." He moved to sit beside her on the bed. "You know I love you." He kissed her forehead and rose to leave. "I'll contact you when I can." He moved to the door, but Natalia scrambled to her feet and blocked his exit.

"Don't leave me with just a peck in the forehead. You can't be that heartless."

She thought him heartless. How could she? He must reassure her before he left, for it would never do to leave each other for an unknown amount of time with questions hanging between them. Gently, he encircled her half naked body with his arms and pulled her softly against him, holding her a little too long, but unable to bring himself to release her. He lifted her chin with his two fingers and pressed his lips to hers, softly savoring their taste and the feel of her flesh one last time. Reluctantly, he pulled away, knowing hat they could not stop time. "I'll never be heartless as long as I have you. You are my heart."

"I love you, Igor," she breathed. "Get word when you can.

"I will, Kitten." He gave her one more lingering kiss on her forehead and then tore himself away while he still had the strength.

Natalia sighed fearfully with the added burden of weaving a tapestry of lies in which she would hide Neville. She had a bad feeling that she couldn't explain. It was most likely just the grief that she always felt after he left, but it was far stronger today, permeating through her entire body like an electric current, leaving her drained and nauseous.

She would have loved nothing more than to flop back into bed, pull the covers over her head and sleep the day away. However, she had businesses to run, patrons to serve and now another mouth that she not only had to feed, but hide in plain sight. It was risky to say the least, but she was his best shot at survival. She raked a brush through her sex-tousled hair, hating to brush away the evidence of him, but knowing that it was the safe move. Nothing could be amiss should anyone examine her or her dealings. The child being dropped off in the middle of the night to her makeshift orphanage was a plausible lie, but her story would have to be airtight.

Before going to the nursery, she looked out the window at the fog-laden street. It was just getting light and the streets were empty except for one lone figure strolling down the street. They were obviously an auror or one of their underlings on a regular patrol of Hogsmeade. While it was concerning considering Igor had just left her bed, it was not out of the ordinary. There was no time to wallow in paranoia, so after a quick scan of both ends of the street, she went to the nursery.

As she walked down the hall she could hear Sandy speaking in her West Indies lilt that she loved hearing. "Dats right, she a new friend to us all." An un audible chirp came from one of the toddlers. "We don know her name. De faries brought her in de middle of de night, just like she brung you all. We gonna call her Jane, and we gonna welcome her into de family. Sandy will need all af you to be good helpers. Can you all do dat for me?"

Natalia closed her eyes and smiled. Mentally thanking Igor for insisting that Sandy stay with her. The exotic little elf was a godsend. Natalia plastered a kid friendly smile into her face and eased the door open. "Good morning! How are my favorite people in the whole wide world?"

"Morning Natty!" They chimed in. She smirked to herself, for no one but adorable little moppets such as these would call her 'Natty' and live to tell about it.

Sandy was perched on a rocking chair, her legs so short that only her feet dangled at the edge. Neville was on her lap devouring a bottle. Natalia smirked. Apparently the little one ate his feelings. "We'll, I see Jane is well tended. What would the rest of you like for breakfast?"

She mentally took note of their requests and walked over to the rocking chair to observe Neville. He was not really suckling the bottle, but merely gumming the bottle with his little eyes darting around the room, taking in his new surroundings. Natalia palmed the silky fine hair on top if his head, causing him to look up at her.

"E's a brave little lad, er lass E never cries unless hungry."

"Bound for Gryffindor one day perhaps," she sighed wistfully remembering Frank and Alice, Gryffindor sweethearts. "I'll get the other children's breakfast together. Bring them down in fifteen minutes."

They were interrupted by a commotion coming from the pub downstairs. "Natalia Smith! Show yourself!" Was heard from the normally silent at this hour streets.

She recognized the rough brogue immediately. "That's Alastair Moody. Whatever could he want and why the rude demands at this hour?" Natalia had a pretty good idea what and whom he wanted. She hoped Igor had gotten safely away. She began to tremble.

"Day soun like trouble," Sandy hissed while wiggling herself down from the rocking chair and pulling Neville close to her chest.

They were interrupted by Roxanne bursting into the room and babbling excitedly. "Natalia! Come quick! These men outside say they are from the Ministry but they don't act like it. They're hassling Cook in the street and won't let him come in. They asked me to remove the wards and let them in, but I'm scared. They're angry about something and keep saying they'll find him with or without my help and..." Roxanne flailed her arms about, huffing so excitedly that Natalia briefly considered slapping her like one does to hysterical women in the movies.

"Hush up!" Natalia, always good in a pressure situation, cut her off and started barking orders. "Roxanne you stay up here with the children and don't act like such a bloody fool! No need to get them all excited. We've nothing to fear from Alastar."

But an aggressive pounding on the door downstairs told them otherwise. "Under the authority of the Minister himself I demand you open this door, Natalia Smith or you will find yourself in Azkaban, so help me Merlin!"

"Take Jane away for now." Natalia spoke to Sandy who nodded and with a pop, dissapparated away.

"Who was that baby? Is that what he wants?" Roxanne demanded.

Natalia whirled around and with a whip of her wand and an obliviation spell, all memory of the child was gone. "What baby? Are you mad? Stay with the children. I'll be right back."

Natalia hurried downstairs, trying to compose herself before she faced the menacing auror. She sighed shakily and opened the door with a nervous smile plastered across her face. "Alastar, we're not open yet but you know I would be more than happy to let you in early if you mind your manners."

The crusty auror reached over the threshold and jerked her out into the street. By the time she found her balance and stood upright he was inches from her face. "Where is he?"

"Where is who?" She tried to look innocent.

"Done play dumb with me missy. I know your hiding him. He was seen in this area last night and I know he'd come straight to you."

"Alastar, I'm sure I don't know what you're talking about. Come inside for some breakfast and let's discuss it."

"Incarserus!" Ropes appeared out of nowhere wrapping around Natalia's arms and pulling them out wide until her arms felt like they would nearly pop out of their sockets. Natalia struggled though she knew it was in vain, for her binds would only tighten against her resistance.

"What's the meaning of this Alaster? You know bloody well I've always been loyal to the ministry!" She tried to keep her voice calm yet forceful, though her heart was racing with fear.

An astonished and still sleepy crowd began to gather in the street, and others huddled in doorways whispering fearfully. She hoped that someone might step forward in her defense but people didn't dare challenge Alaster Moody these days. The Ministry permitted him to do his duty by any means necessary.

"Tell me where he is or you'll find yer lily white arse in Azkaban for harboring Death Eaters."

"I...I don't know what you mean, Alastar," she protested. I'm not harboring anyone."

"You must think I'm a fool. I know you used to have a thing for that Slavic Satan and I'd wager it's still going on."

"That ended ages ago."

"Don't bother lying. We've been watching this place. I know Malfoy is a regular," he paused to clear his throat in a rather leading manner, "patron. I know he supports your orphanage and whatever it's a front for."

"It's not a front for anything. Alastar let me go!"

"Not till you tell me where Karkaroff is hiding!"

"Why would I even bother hiding him? Why would he need to hide? Has actually done something or is this just harassment by a ministry so drunk with fear and power that they've taken to attacking their own people? I thought people were still free to come and go as they pleased."

"Oh he's done something all right. He led an attack on the private home of an auror last night that resulted in two people being sent to St. Mungos who may never come out! As if that weren't horrible enough, he's also wanted for kidnapping."

Natalia knew she was in trouble now. They knew almost everything. "Kidnapped?"

"That's right. He's maimed your old classmates the Longbottoms and taken their son. I fully expect to find him hidden in your establishment. If you want to save yourself, you'll let us in"

Though she knew their search would uncover nothing, she also knew the longer she kept him occupied, the longer Igor and Sandy would have to get away from his reach, so she remained difficult. "You have no cause or right to search my home and business, so I will thank you to leave and not return unless you have proper authorization to search. Obviously you don't have it now or you wouldn't need to try to bully your way past me."

"Very well, as you like it." He stalked behind her and before she knew it he was uttering one of the darkest spells she knew. "Septum semprtum!"

She felt the cold sting across her back before the violent burn of her shredded flesh paralyzed her with pain and terror. She choked and gasped, but was too stunned to protest or argue further. She hung loosely in the restraints, knees buckled and head lolling weakly, before Alaster came around to be in her face again.

"Tell me where he is or there's more to come."

"I don't...know " she cried meekly through the burning pain.

"Let her go!" Igor's voice boomed through the air as he stepped out of the morning shadows and into his fate. "I surrender." She looked up in time to see him raise his hands and release his wand. It seem to fall from his fingertips in slow motion before clicking against the cobblestones.

"Igor, NO!" Natalia shouted, but it was no use. The other aurors had him bound and disarmed before she could blink. The binds clenched tightly around his limbs eliciting a wince and dropping him to his knees. His head bowed as he accepted what had befallen him.

"Let her go," Moody barked. "He's the one we came for." Natalia's bonds disintegrated and she immediately ran towards her shackled love.

"Igor, what have you done? Are you mad?" The aurors allowed her to touch his shoulders for he was going nowhere under their guard.

"I've failed you many times, Natalia. Not today," he breathed. "For once, I've done the right thing."

"Oh, you fool, this will land you in Azkaban. Don't worry though. I'll find a way to get you out. " Natalia fussed desperately about touching his hair and stroking his shoulders.

But Igor shook his head slowly. "I'm afraid they won't allow that, Kitten. This is goodbye."

"No, don't say that," she cried. "We'll find a way."

Igor sighed in resignation to his fate. "Write to my parents and Levin. Tell them I love them and I'm sorry I've disgraced them."

"Don't talk like that. You'll see them again. I'll make sure of it."

He groaned like a wounded animal. "You were the best thing that ever happened to me, Natalia. I was too much of a fool to hold on to you. Our time together was the happiest time of my life."

"Oh, mine too, but there will be more."

"'Fraid not ,Miss Smith." Alastar pushed his fat carcass between them. "Karkaroff s going away forever. Mark my words; you'll be the better for it. Take him away."

"I love you, Igor!" Natalia managed to shout her last words before Alastar and his Ministry henchman apparated and left her with nothing but misery.

_AN: I'm sure many of you thought I had abandoned this story. I haven't abandoned it, just been derailed by life lately. Rest assured there will be much more to come._

_Enjoy your holidays!_


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